All-American Small Town Evil Conspiracy Quest
- Thread starter EarthScorpion
- Start date
- Original
[X] Black Goat Excavating Inc.
I'd like to vote for Omicron's Black Goat plan, because I found it hysterical. Particularly the parts about how the old executives got eaten, and how the new guy's free skill is pieces of smart people in his head. The whole thing is flavorful in all the best sort of eldritch horror/business type wording that I love. I liked all the plans I've read so far, honestly, but Black Goat Excavating Inc really stood out to me.
I'd like to vote for Omicron's Black Goat plan, because I found it hysterical. Particularly the parts about how the old executives got eaten, and how the new guy's free skill is pieces of smart people in his head. The whole thing is flavorful in all the best sort of eldritch horror/business type wording that I love. I liked all the plans I've read so far, honestly, but Black Goat Excavating Inc really stood out to me.
While I really like the Black Goats I'm disappointed we don't have an Alien conspiracy, what in this day of new XCOM and X-Files.
What is the name of The Conspiracy?
[X] American Youth Yokels and Locals of Marin and Alameda Organization
(Yes, actual Californian counties)
What is the nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] Outsiders from beyond the stars that have come to harvest the planet and its people
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] Defeated twice before, once because Zorbleck couldn't keep it in his pants and managed to get a terrible rash spread throughout the fleet and once due to the abominable nature of rock music, nothing will stand in the way of this conquering civilization! Except they're running a bit low on funds after the head Gorner Kirchack blew all their space gold in the Great Galactic Lottery, they've decided to start small and insidiously brainwash the youth so that they'll have native foot soldiers for their eventual conquest. They also have been performing experiments on the local livestock in hopes of creating something to fund their nefarious plans and maybe win back the Maldevian Cluster from their old foes, the Nitrish.
What is your Secret Lair?
[X] They have a variant upon the Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts that was introduced after scandal ripped those organizations apart. They also run the local Boy and Girls clubs and through shell companies own the local minimum wage joints where said youth toil. Their main headquarters is the two story McJhorblok's building in the office district which, much like their restaurants, has a nice disc shape to it.
Tools of the Conspiracy:
Supreme Leader
[X] True Name: Mzack Maci
[X] Local Troop Leader and McJhorblok's Burgers and Shakes Regional Manager
[X] Actually gets most of his knowledge on Earth culture from bad sitcoms such as TBBT and 3rd Planet from the Sun, which tends to hinder his ability to convince kids and teens that he's "cool" and "with it"
Write in One Combat Skill, One Management Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Somehow able to get kids all moving in the same direction (Free 3)
[X] Ancient Alien Technology (Combat 4)
[X] Able to Make Money and Not Have Huge Employee Turnover in this Economy (Management 5)
Local Authority and Influence
[X] Influence over the School Board likes what they're doing in terms of turning kids into productive adults and getting them off that horrid electric guitar "music" so the conspiracy has a great pull with how the schools are run (2 dice)
[X] Extensive Control of the local official youth organizations such that they all march to the beat of the same Karshian Worm fitted drum, be it either direct or through funding (4 dice)
[X] McJhorblok's Burgers and Shakes is entirely owned by the Organization, testing our their horrid genetic abominations such as a cow that makes its own barbecue sauce! Most of this happens up the supply chain however (6 dice)
What is the name of The Conspiracy?
[X] American Youth Yokels and Locals of Marin and Alameda Organization
(Yes, actual Californian counties)
What is the nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] Outsiders from beyond the stars that have come to harvest the planet and its people
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] Defeated twice before, once because Zorbleck couldn't keep it in his pants and managed to get a terrible rash spread throughout the fleet and once due to the abominable nature of rock music, nothing will stand in the way of this conquering civilization! Except they're running a bit low on funds after the head Gorner Kirchack blew all their space gold in the Great Galactic Lottery, they've decided to start small and insidiously brainwash the youth so that they'll have native foot soldiers for their eventual conquest. They also have been performing experiments on the local livestock in hopes of creating something to fund their nefarious plans and maybe win back the Maldevian Cluster from their old foes, the Nitrish.
What is your Secret Lair?
[X] They have a variant upon the Boy Scouts and Girl Scouts that was introduced after scandal ripped those organizations apart. They also run the local Boy and Girls clubs and through shell companies own the local minimum wage joints where said youth toil. Their main headquarters is the two story McJhorblok's building in the office district which, much like their restaurants, has a nice disc shape to it.
Tools of the Conspiracy:
Supreme Leader
[X] True Name: Mzack Maci
[X] Local Troop Leader and McJhorblok's Burgers and Shakes Regional Manager
[X] Actually gets most of his knowledge on Earth culture from bad sitcoms such as TBBT and 3rd Planet from the Sun, which tends to hinder his ability to convince kids and teens that he's "cool" and "with it"
Write in One Combat Skill, One Management Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] Somehow able to get kids all moving in the same direction (Free 3)
[X] Ancient Alien Technology (Combat 4)
[X] Able to Make Money and Not Have Huge Employee Turnover in this Economy (Management 5)
Local Authority and Influence
[X] Influence over the School Board likes what they're doing in terms of turning kids into productive adults and getting them off that horrid electric guitar "music" so the conspiracy has a great pull with how the schools are run (2 dice)
[X] Extensive Control of the local official youth organizations such that they all march to the beat of the same Karshian Worm fitted drum, be it either direct or through funding (4 dice)
[X] McJhorblok's Burgers and Shakes is entirely owned by the Organization, testing our their horrid genetic abominations such as a cow that makes its own barbecue sauce! Most of this happens up the supply chain however (6 dice)
NonSequtur
a body
u really want to contest the church of st. jagger for the youth vote
[ ] Black Go-
...ahahaha oh god that acronym this is almost the best conspiracy
Which makes it all the harder to vote for the best conspiracy
[X] Black Goat Excavating Inc.
...ahahaha oh god that acronym this is almost the best conspiracy
Which makes it all the harder to vote for the best conspiracy
[X] Black Goat Excavating Inc.
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prometheus110
Join Cayman-Global & be part of the 1E-9 percent!
- Location
- La Ballena City Raft
- Pronouns
- He/Him
What is the Name of the Conspiracy?
[X] Killer robots need no names. They are merely killer robots sent from a dystopian future by some alphabet-soup agency long after the US bureaucracy became entirely cybernetic, to eliminate inefficiency in previous US administrations.
What is the Nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] Killer Robots From The Future Secretly Planning To Take Over The World
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] The conspiracy is seeking to replace the US government with implacable, unstoppable death machines to defeat PARTISAN GRIDLOCK and ensure AMERICAN DOMINANCE. Or something.
[X] Oakspring is a small town which nobody notices. It is the perfect place to put underground secret robot factories, vanish people to replace them with killer robots, and you know, send out serial killers to kill that damnable Sarah Connor.
Secret Lair:
[X] The abandoned car factory next to the town once provided it with much wealth, but now has been repurposed to build the next generation ofbipedal autonomous killer robots.
The Supreme Leader:
"God had a pretty decent idea when he tried to wipe mankind out a couple of times."
Father Michael Hamilton, the local priest.
Fatal Flaw:Time travel did some damage on his circuits. He doesn't like to admit this, but he's more or less forgotten exactly what he needs to do. He only has a general idea.
Actually a Unstoppable Killer Robot-5
He Absolutely Will Not Stop Paying You Overtime, Ever, Until The Job Is Done-4
Theology-3
Local Authority and Influence
Utter Control: [X] The local church. Most people outside of Oakspring would refuse to believe that Jesus is actually a cyborg, but it makes total sense. Jesus was half-divine, machines are divine, ergo Jesus was a cyborg. Nobody in Oakspring bats an eye when religiously-inspired murals seem to make angels look more like killer drones with laser guns than pretty humans with wings. And holy communion takes a very different tone when there are nanomachines involved.
Extensive Control: [X] The Local Blue-Collar Worker's Union. Many of them think that they're building these robots to Make America Great Again. They're... actually not wrong. They will probably be rewarded by having their brains destructively scanned and their personalities installed into killer robot chassis at some point. Dissidents will, of course, be exterminated with laser eyes.
Influence: [X] The police. They took a look at their new blank-faced recruits wearing shades and asking around for people by name and decided that yes, this was a good idea.
Let's sacrifice some teenagers to Cyborg Jesus, guys.
[X] Killer robots need no names. They are merely killer robots sent from a dystopian future by some alphabet-soup agency long after the US bureaucracy became entirely cybernetic, to eliminate inefficiency in previous US administrations.
What is the Nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] Killer Robots From The Future Secretly Planning To Take Over The World
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] The conspiracy is seeking to replace the US government with implacable, unstoppable death machines to defeat PARTISAN GRIDLOCK and ensure AMERICAN DOMINANCE. Or something.
[X] Oakspring is a small town which nobody notices. It is the perfect place to put underground secret robot factories, vanish people to replace them with killer robots, and you know, send out serial killers to kill that damnable Sarah Connor.
Secret Lair:
[X] The abandoned car factory next to the town once provided it with much wealth, but now has been repurposed to build the next generation ofbipedal autonomous killer robots.
The Supreme Leader:
"God had a pretty decent idea when he tried to wipe mankind out a couple of times."
Father Michael Hamilton, the local priest.
Fatal Flaw:Time travel did some damage on his circuits. He doesn't like to admit this, but he's more or less forgotten exactly what he needs to do. He only has a general idea.
Actually a Unstoppable Killer Robot-5
He Absolutely Will Not Stop Paying You Overtime, Ever, Until The Job Is Done-4
Theology-3
Local Authority and Influence
Utter Control: [X] The local church. Most people outside of Oakspring would refuse to believe that Jesus is actually a cyborg, but it makes total sense. Jesus was half-divine, machines are divine, ergo Jesus was a cyborg. Nobody in Oakspring bats an eye when religiously-inspired murals seem to make angels look more like killer drones with laser guns than pretty humans with wings. And holy communion takes a very different tone when there are nanomachines involved.
Extensive Control: [X] The Local Blue-Collar Worker's Union. Many of them think that they're building these robots to Make America Great Again. They're... actually not wrong. They will probably be rewarded by having their brains destructively scanned and their personalities installed into killer robot chassis at some point. Dissidents will, of course, be exterminated with laser eyes.
Influence: [X] The police. They took a look at their new blank-faced recruits wearing shades and asking around for people by name and decided that yes, this was a good idea.
Let's sacrifice some teenagers to Cyborg Jesus, guys.
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Look guys the killer robots are the only conspiracy promising to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN. Like that America which never existed in the past but will because the killer robots will build it. Thus you should vote for them, because they have a broad constituency!
They have wide-ranging support from blue-collar workers and religious leaders. What else do they need?
They have wide-ranging support from blue-collar workers and religious leaders. What else do they need?
I like to think of this as coming from the opposite direction; who else do you think Unplugged Nirvana and ushered in an age of acoustics such that their heads would no longer explode?
Plus playing as an outpost of Space Argentina tickles my fancy.
Emy
Artificial Defender
Yes. Yes, you can.
Remember what Scorp was saying about "not a farce"?
- Location
- in the trash
But we're the villains.
And if the villains are the ones who want to make America Great Again that must mean the protagonists are Anti-American.
Clearly.
Well, punny names are still okay. See B.O.N.E.R.
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Well yes. See? That just makes the dynamics better. The 90s TV show which we're clearly playing in will ask its watchers if what they're doing is REALLY pro-american, or if it's actually pro-american to question authority. This being the 90s, the answer is obviously the latter. This makes the killer robots the most thematic of all.
Emy
Artificial Defender
It's not just the name. Maybe it's only my personal taste, but I thought the whole writeup skewed too far toward the farcical end of the irreverence spectrum.
- Location
- in the trash
You do have a point tha it might be a bit too... yeah. Though we'll let ES be the final arbiter of that.
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It's the older adults trying to be cool, how youth organizations are indoctrinating our kids, the bleak reality of teenager jobs. I dressed it up with plentiful amounts of humor but I think basically everything here draws on actual issues (much more on the Boy Scouts than Girl Scouts really though).
The only funny for the sake of funny is the pure background such as the War of the Worlds and Mars Attacks references but if we're going with Cyborg Jesus I think that's reasonable.
I will fight to the death to have Space Argentina over generic galactic wars though.
prometheus110
Join Cayman-Global & be part of the 1E-9 percent!
- Location
- La Ballena City Raft
- Pronouns
- He/Him
My only question is why it took me until now to think of The Sharing. We could be Yeerks, Yeerks!
Yeerks, despite being in a young adult novel, are way too dark for a 90s teen TV show. That's X-Files territory and even then it's one off episodes in small isolated areas rather than "your friends and family are screaming let me out but nobody can hear them." Animorphs was a goddamn horror series masquerading as teen adventure.
- Location
- Brittany, France
- Pronouns
- He/Him
The great thing about Black Goat Excavating is make-up.
This is a 90s-styled conspiracy explicitly inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This means that special effects and monsters tend to be designed with ample paint and rubber. It has a very particular aesthetic; most monsters are clearly people in suits, but the suits are elaborate and with a very 'thick,' organic aspect to it, while the inhuman monsters are animated props with those odd, stilted movements of hand-made effects.
It's very... grungy, gritty visually speaking. Not smooth. You have executives who look like normal people but with overly pale, pasty features, a plastic-like complexion; and you have employees who burst out in grotesque The Thing fashion, meaty rubber tentacles flailing haphazardly around. It's grotesque but in a fashion that has been used for both very spectacular horror and more comedic action, and to me it's a feature of the times.
This is a 90s-styled conspiracy explicitly inspired by Buffy the Vampire Slayer. This means that special effects and monsters tend to be designed with ample paint and rubber. It has a very particular aesthetic; most monsters are clearly people in suits, but the suits are elaborate and with a very 'thick,' organic aspect to it, while the inhuman monsters are animated props with those odd, stilted movements of hand-made effects.
It's very... grungy, gritty visually speaking. Not smooth. You have executives who look like normal people but with overly pale, pasty features, a plastic-like complexion; and you have employees who burst out in grotesque The Thing fashion, meaty rubber tentacles flailing haphazardly around. It's grotesque but in a fashion that has been used for both very spectacular horror and more comedic action, and to me it's a feature of the times.
And we're clearly going for the "those darned teenagers foiled my plans once again!" tone there, rather than "those traumatized child soldiers have killed another two dozens of my elite soldiers in a gruelling battle of dismemberment, what can possibly stop them?"
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prometheus110
Join Cayman-Global & be part of the 1E-9 percent!
- Location
- La Ballena City Raft
- Pronouns
- He/Him
- Location
- UTC -6
What is the name of The Conspiracy?
[X] Ed's Grand Endeavour
What is the nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] For years everything that could go wrong for Edward Greene did go wrong. Until he realized that he could inflict his vast misfortunes upon others, and by doing so gain a measure of luck for himself. After a few false starts he formed a group dedicated to his goals.
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] The good luck stolen from others always runs out, usually at the worst possible time. Edward has set his sights on the greatest concentration of luck possible! He will open the gates of Heaven and seize all blessings for himself. Once done he will be able to grant fortune and misfortune and rule the world as a god!
[X] To open the way to Heaven is no easy task. In a run of stolen luck he recruited a sage that determined that a ritual involving a nuclear explosion would open a gate to that blessed realm. Oaksprings nearby silos are an ideal source for these components.
What is your Secret Lair?
[X] Your efforts to influence the local politicians with your magic have borne fruit. The Endeavour has been brought in to do a security audit on the nuclear silos, thus allowing your team to sniff around the perimeter and construct "theoretical" plans for how to subvert them from the comfort of the the town hall.
The Supreme Leader
[X] Edward F. Green, Sorcerer of luck and fate.
[X] Posing as an outside security consultant, probably disgraced to be sent to the middle of nowhere.
[X] Even though he's experienced the crash of bad luck many times, he can't seem to stop himself from relying upon stolen luck and risky plans. This leads to greater trouble down the road as some of the bad luck draws in angry supernatural beings to investigate. And then he steals more luck to try and get out of it.
Write in One Combat Skill, One Management Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] There will be a curse upon you if you fail. (Management 3)
[X] Slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. (Combat 4)
[X] Phenomenal, if short lived, luck. (Free 5)
Local Authority and Influence
[X] The Banks: By using some luck and misfortune you've caused the local banks to prosper, and earned a vast amount of money and influence for your conspiracy (6 dice)
[X] City Hall: You've bent many of the local politicians to your will by cursing their opponents to ensure victory. (4 dice)
[X] The Tradesmen: A place must be prepared for the ritual, much money has been spent to buy control over the builders. (2 dice)
I just like the idea of stealing luck by breaking into Heaven.
[X] Ed's Grand Endeavour
What is the nature of the Conspiracy?
[X] For years everything that could go wrong for Edward Greene did go wrong. Until he realized that he could inflict his vast misfortunes upon others, and by doing so gain a measure of luck for himself. After a few false starts he formed a group dedicated to his goals.
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[X] The good luck stolen from others always runs out, usually at the worst possible time. Edward has set his sights on the greatest concentration of luck possible! He will open the gates of Heaven and seize all blessings for himself. Once done he will be able to grant fortune and misfortune and rule the world as a god!
[X] To open the way to Heaven is no easy task. In a run of stolen luck he recruited a sage that determined that a ritual involving a nuclear explosion would open a gate to that blessed realm. Oaksprings nearby silos are an ideal source for these components.
What is your Secret Lair?
[X] Your efforts to influence the local politicians with your magic have borne fruit. The Endeavour has been brought in to do a security audit on the nuclear silos, thus allowing your team to sniff around the perimeter and construct "theoretical" plans for how to subvert them from the comfort of the the town hall.
The Supreme Leader
[X] Edward F. Green, Sorcerer of luck and fate.
[X] Posing as an outside security consultant, probably disgraced to be sent to the middle of nowhere.
[X] Even though he's experienced the crash of bad luck many times, he can't seem to stop himself from relying upon stolen luck and risky plans. This leads to greater trouble down the road as some of the bad luck draws in angry supernatural beings to investigate. And then he steals more luck to try and get out of it.
Write in One Combat Skill, One Management Skill, and One Free Skill:
[X] There will be a curse upon you if you fail. (Management 3)
[X] Slings and arrows of outrageous fortune. (Combat 4)
[X] Phenomenal, if short lived, luck. (Free 5)
Local Authority and Influence
[X] The Banks: By using some luck and misfortune you've caused the local banks to prosper, and earned a vast amount of money and influence for your conspiracy (6 dice)
[X] City Hall: You've bent many of the local politicians to your will by cursing their opponents to ensure victory. (4 dice)
[X] The Tradesmen: A place must be prepared for the ritual, much money has been spent to buy control over the builders. (2 dice)
I just like the idea of stealing luck by breaking into Heaven.
Ah, if only they had gone forward and made a TV show. What a show that would have been! But alas, we must assign that to the "what-if" dustbin of history for that which never was.The books were like that, sure.
But the show.....
Ridiculously Average Guy
I'm you, but stronger
- Location
-
I didn't see it until I was older, but looking back...Animorphs was rpetty fucking grim and had a great universe.
Which is unfortunate since the sheer number of books, their size, and the way they were published keeps them from getting the recognition they should.
~~~~~~~~
I was thinking, could the more popular other conspiracies be setting up in other towns across the states rather than just scrapped? Because that would be nice.
Also sets up evil orgs for later seasons/spin-offs.
Which is unfortunate since the sheer number of books, their size, and the way they were published keeps them from getting the recognition they should.
~~~~~~~~
I was thinking, could the more popular other conspiracies be setting up in other towns across the states rather than just scrapped? Because that would be nice.
Also sets up evil orgs for later seasons/spin-offs.
About that ...
Well, you might like this:
What is the name of The Conspiracy?
[x] [Classified]
What is the nature of the Conspiracy?
[x] [Redacted] Well, that's not completely true. The freedom of information request you submitted did get a response, even if the only thing usable in it was your own name. Also, the cryptic orders on government stationary have to be coming from somewhere, as does your generous paycheck.
What is The Conspiracy's ultimate goals and what makes Oakspring important??
[x] Officially also [Classified], but so far you've mostly been supervising, writing reports, and keeping tabs on everyone else in town. You expect this will change soon, but you're not sure how.
[x] Your here because the town is full of secret conspiracies. It's probably just coincidence, for them, but you're glad since your girlfriend lives nearby. You thought that you were going to have to move to the east coast, but when you asked for something closer, this appeared on the list.
What is your Secret Lair?
[x] A nondescript room in a nondescript office building near the center of town, luckily you get a window and a corner office, and most of the other patrons seem nice enough (except Steve).
Tools of the Conspiracy
The Supreme Leader
The supreme leader leads the group. If they're killed... well, unless there's a trusted lieutenant who can take over, it's game over for you. And you don't have a trusted lieutenant yet.
[x] Jason Brown, while this is your birth name, it seems to fit right in for some reason.
[x] It turns out that if you look like you know what your doing, look like you work for the government, and you give someone a specific order, they do it. Who knew? Other than that, you're just the average white collar mid-level manager.
[x] Your completely out of your depth here. You just wanted a steady paycheck, not these secret spy shenanigans.
Write in One Combat Skill, One Management Skill, and One Free Skill:
[x] Running away at 3 (combat)
[x] Actually enjoys filling out forms 4 (management)
[x] Somehow always succeeds, generally not sure how 5 (free)
Local Authority and Influence
[x] The town's other conspiracies, of which there are many. Somehow none of them expect to be infiltrated in turn. (6 dice)
[x] Your homeowner's association. For some reason you were the only one who ran for office and nobody shows up at the meetings, except Steve; dammit Steve, go away, nobody likes you. (4 dice)
[x] Other local government agencies seem to mostly do what you tell them to. Eventually. (2 dice)
It's late enough and close enough to a farce that it probably can't win, but @EarthScorpion claims he wants an idea of what we're looking for in our conspiracy quest, and the above should provide.