A Frellin' Messy Crossover pile of shi....

Just why in the F*ck am I doing this?
Ok. As an aside for any who got here?

Any who ask themselves why bother if there are few reactions/likes/whatever?

....

Well, this is hobby writing not for praise and recognition.

It is nice to get recognition and praise.

But for me? It is stress relief. 😕

If I wasn't doing this I'd be doing something less healthy. Like drinking to the destruction of the liver or something else as stupid.
 
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A Tale in Which Taylor's Elden Ring Adventure Get's Interrupted by . . . Gate Crashers-Chapter6: Side Effects May Vary....
Side Effects May Vary....

"Morgott? Brother?!" a merry, booming male sounding voice shouts from behind. "Queen mother let you finally free of the Shunning Grounds!? Fantastic!!"

Margit (or rather Morgott) . . .

The whole SERIES of expressions that pass across the Fell Omen was a thing to see! Lilith later would say that it had been worthy of an Oscar movie award! She'd say that they just don't MAKE the play of expressions that Margit displayed like that any more!



Nah! What actually happens here is that Margit (let's just call him that for now) FREEZES in his tracks with a look of utter shock and disbelief.

OH! Yes, the Omen King had had both the flash of mortification and rage at to having his real identity being broadcast far and wide. However, THIS was his long lost brother Godwyn!

….

Unlike with his half brother and sister demigods Miquella and Trina, Morgott had enough spent more than enough time with Godwyn on his visits to know the demigod by first sight (and other senses versions as well).

It had been one of the more welcome memories he and his brother Mogh had whilst entrapped in the Shunning Grounds. Godwyn (and Lord Godfrey) had always made it a point to visit both himself and his brother down in the Shunning Grounds . . . While the other siblings pretty much only saw him face to face AFTER he and Mogh had escaped the Grounds.

Meaning exactly what in this case? Simple! It meant that unlike his earlier meeting with his half brother Miquella (and Trina), Margit (Morgott) is able to tell that this is the true Godwyn. An impostor would be hard pressed to fool him.

So anyway!

After spinning around and looking at Godwyn the Golden--who's apparently managed to excuse himself from the crowd of people he'd been traveling with, promising to just see WHO the petitioners and report back—the Fell Omen King then gave himself whiplash doing a wild take first to the masked (female) mage at his side. Trina looks back at him, a bit shocked herself.

The Tarnished wasn't attempting some kind of grand scheme to gain yet another Great Shard. Unaware of the . ..

Okay, let's just say that Trina and Morgott are now thoroughly confused. And not that they both are unhappy to see Godwyn, but . . . THEY BOTH HAD SO MANY questions now. All of the demigods present (or at least most have so many questions now).

Melania already had a boat load of questions for Lilith, but that list had piled up BEFORE Lord Godwyn's unexpected appearance. She is very sure that Lady Lilith shall answer those questions. When there comes a proper time, this ODD Tarnished (or whatever Lilith REALLY happened to be here) would answer. Fully and properly.

Right now Lilith had been following "a feeling" and was too invested on following it up. "Paying due diligence", the pale winged woman had said pretty much when Godwyn had stumbled into the picture back in Stormveil Castle.

And HEY! Maybe in the course of things maybe Melania could find out what her purpose could/should be now that. That made the waiting a bit more bearable than what it could be for the false Finger Maiden....

Margit--let us just continue calling him that—also has a barge full of questions himself. But the top question running through his startled mind is...


"How?" the Fell Omen sputters, looking wildly back at Lilith. "How didst thou even KNOW my broth!. . . that Lord Godwyn was within Stormveil Castle, much less hale and WHOLE?!"

"Brother?" Godwyn asks, meanwhile finding himself in a situation that he'd jumped into blind with BOTH FEET.

Who was this Tarnished, and why was his brother Morgott acting like he had seen . . .

Idiot, Godwyn lambasted himself realizing at least SOME of what was happening!

Everyone he had met before now had kept saying that he'd DIED during the Night of the Black Knife, correct? That his body had lived, but his soul had been destroyed. That mean that in as far as Morgott was concerned, Godwyn was actually something of a ghost indeed!

Or something worse than a ghost... at least until now, with Godwyn's unexpected recovery—both in body and soul-- down in the bowels of Stormveil Castle.

"Simply put?" Lilith answers after giving a quick (but hopefully acceptable curtsy, albeit in power armour) to both Lord Godwyn and Lord Morgott. "After hearing from one of the Grafted Scion twins here with me that their castle had gotten invaded by a Tarnished Army? While the other may have not noticed an invading army with THEIR version of Stormveil Castle, I wasn't going to just blithely waltz up here and have a coin flip of a chance of running into hostiles like some kind of idiot; and thus risking the twins here getting injured or worse."

Lilith suppressed a shudder, remembering that ONE bio-warning her probes had detected moments earlier. Which had of course made her opt on going OVERT with her scrying, by using her more powerful magics.

The Scarlet Rot was like nothing she had ever seen before and was something... She'd rather NEVER had seen.

Then again, she and her gang had walked in another realm recently with diseases even worse, she supposed.

Nurgle was an actual thing, she recalled back in the Warhammer 40k realm. Nasty!!

. . .

Do remember that name and setting here in the future! It will . . .become relevant.



"That would not do at all!" Lilith finishes off. "Especially if the one young woman I detected was somehow VICTIM of that VERY THING in some way. Would be more concerned about things and not be even THINKING about coming here if not for a pure gold magic needle keeping her scarlet rot in check!"

"What?!' the Fell Omen shouts in alarm. Bad enough that this was the VERY first time he had heard of anything about anything about an actual ARMY of Tarnished having attacked Stormveil Castle. But that the fools had used Crimson Rot?! In that manner?

Nobody but NOBODY with any sanity (and few with insanity) would dare try such a ploy, because of how dangerous that curse/disease happened to be! Ah, and Morgott is not the only one who'd been alarmed about this insanity. Lilith and those who'd been traveling with her had been VERY alarmed about the young woman's infection of Crimson Rot (even if it had been held in check with an unalloyed gold needle). The fact that more of the same should have been used on the castle? Even IF the physical evidence had been mystically whisked away . . .



In his time line.

Yes, it is pretty much as you have figured. This Morgott the Omen King (who moonlights as Margit the Fell) happens to hale from another reality (aka an "invader" as they call doppelgangers here about).

"Especially when said Tarnished Army unleashed Crimson Rot upon the castle," adds Godwyn, gesturing back towards the way he came. "The tales that Craw . . .that Crawa 'the Winged' told me was most alarming things. Which . . .I can see you had no idea has happened?"

With a minimal of back and forth between brothers the fact that Morgott the Omen King finally confirm what those who are reading have by NOW figured out. So now everyone was on the same page (more or less). Morgott now was aware that his doppelganger had been defeat while barring the way to the castle from the Tarnished Army. The other Omen King was probably still back in the Royal Capital of Leyndell, taking care of the business of running the city (from the shadows) and such. So as such the OTHER Morgott wasn't aware YET of what was going on here. . . .

Back at the Capital, meanwhile....

Margit the Fell (let us called him this to differentiate from the Omen back at Stormveil Castle), after having seen the now much healthier Erdtree (among other things) is attempting to figure OUT what in the Hell is going on here.

But while trying to direct everything (and trying NOT to pull out his hair over reports of isolated town guards here and there questioning his authority) and a bunch of the peasantry being out and about instead of observing the curfew...

And trying to not pull his hair out in trying to figure out why it seemed like everyone in the city (and those who lived OUTSIDE the city) seemed to be so . . . unconcerned about all the changes about. The Erdtree being back to full health (but still baring entry to all that try to enter). Why all those about him seemed so . . .passive and submissive to given orders from those with authority....

<....>

Above and inside the Erdtree another . . .entity is also wanting to tear it's metaphorical hair out as well. Nice and well that the Elden Ring is no longer shattered. That the shards are now back in place (including certain shards which Queen Marika had removed without authorization), but . . .why were there Great Shards still out in the wild? With the Shard Bearers? Why were the minor Shards still out in the wild? Still being used as currency?

How did this happen? Who did this?! The Entity had just finally gotten back to fix things and . . .somebody already did it.

Well, he/she/it would look into it more thoroughly instead of from afar after fixing the broken Queen. The . . .more agreeable one who'd been screaming in rage at her mirror still crucified above, enraged at what her doppelganger had done of her own free will while she (the other) had been a mere puppet . . .

And then FINALLY that anomaly can be addressed! Why in the Blind Eternities was that Outer Goddess still here?! The sacrificial offering by way of the Contingency should have satiated her to where she would have naff-ed off to where ever Outer Gods and Goddess scamper off to when not interfering with an honest Deity's hard work. She had the Emperium in hand to play with, but NOOOO!!! Still scampering about, mucking things up here and there by just LINGERING!!

As safety measure, as much as this Entity found such extreme measures distasteful even for him/her, better to have the masses at large held in a passive/submissive state than needlessly panicking and tearing all things down. Not before the Entity could make their next move....

When his train of thought is interrupted by a single, screamed name. A male voice that is very familiar to those who are familiar with the James Bond movie franchise: Rikiya Koyama.

It is a dead ringer for that actor's voice, but while Human enough but . . .more is than human! It says A name.

Not that the Greater Will would know that...

<....>


Said in hate.

AND RAGE!!


"Kirei!!" is the screamed name.

That priest. That PRIEST!

Played a part in the death of his daughter in some paths of the Fifth Grail War, capping off his failures in the Fourth Grail War.

Played a direct part in his Wife's death! Leaving behind that twisted . . .mirror that he'd had to put down after "winning" the Fourth Grail War, else the world die in Grail Mud...

....

Yeah, she'd been destined to die because of being the integral part of the War as it were, but it would have been a gentle death. Not what Kirei did!

. . .

Not what he'd had to . . .do in that fell dream state . . .

"You?!" the fake priest blinks, not expecting to suddenly see his opponent from the Fourth Grail War.

"Do it," the Magus Killer mutters, not even bothering to chat with long time enemies. As amusing as it would be, right before ending him . . .and all other evil and just plain WRONG things in his and his son's . . .Grail Wars.

Rei Takahashi, the ring leader in this ill advised jaunt to save those . . .who'd been otherwise beyond saving due to "unforeseen consequences" and "outsider interference", nods.

The Magus Killer's brevity was a God Send after dealing with the "Heroic Spirits" who kept insisting on giving their live stories EVERY SINGLE combat situation!

MADDENING!

A magical device is activated, and the LITERAL substitute (literal) heart/regent for activating the Grail . . .burns into ash, destroying the life support device that kept it beating until now.

There is a huge cracking sound of the Dome above all in Rei's holographic image of the world they had left behind. The look of surprise (and more than a little fear) in Kirei's face was . . .heartening to those viewing it from this end of things. Almost made the dark humor of the fake/evil priest falling into the darkness below as all but he and other . . . people and things (certain Servants and Worm Using Maguses) that just CANNOT be brought along without endangering ALL!

Not that the falling last longs.

Blinking, she sees a flash of bright light along with a great cracking of glass before EVERYTHING is swallowed in lava....

The coup de grace is where the blasted/ruined surface of a sun scorched Earth finally, after magicks had been keeping it OUT finally succumbs to gravity. And doing a somewhat graceful swan dive into the surface of the Red Giant the Sun had become after so long.

Five billion years overdue, the death of this Earth. Considering that due to unforeseen consequences of Magus society dealing in things beyond it's kin with the Grail Wars (with all the cheating and twisting this and that). Nothing outside of the dome had lived very much longer due to a train of consequences from the Grail War fallout.

Looking around and seeing (gladly!) that she is no longer in a moonlit night grace VICTORIAN style graveyard.... And feeling utterly drained as the cost of that ceremony she'd participated in for this Fell Grail War beginning to hit her, she turns to look at one Rin Tosaka.

"Ah and now about that appology you owe," Rei sneers, looking at the tsundere. "We'll start with me and . . . maybe go from their to the rest of the gang, hm?"

After a short bout of sputtering, Rin squares her shoulders and gives it. Considering the powers she'd seen displayed (and Archer outright refusing to intercede in this embarrassing situation)? She gives it, but . . .

...

See, Rei and the gang? Not the most trusting of sort, given what they know about this setting with Magus types? Even if Rin was considered a decent person by far compared to most Maguskind?

It was lost to time due a war of multi-spanning proportions. There had been archives to preserve pop culture, but some kinds had fallen through the cracks.

The idea of using "built in lie detectors" in power suits had come from some web novel where a power wearing "Hero" had used such on a regular basis.

It came from the same place where becoming the "Queen of Esculation" haled from, even if WHO the Queen was there wasn't known nowaday.

That and said "hero"? Had the worst taste in commercial sponsers for products supporting his crusades for "justice" and "law". After all, what kind of freak would allow their visage to be placed upon woman's panties of all things?!

Rin's appology is lack luster, but the damnable thing?

She didn't mean a single word of it.

Smiling slightly, a smile that did not reach her eyes, Rei nods at Rin. The smile then drops.

"...And thus we managed to wrangle out the wish to teleport ALL to a world where they all could perish and prosper," the extremely tired (barely standing) young woman says as he glares the twin tailed tsundere. "Managing the nearly impossible considering the CURSED nature of the Grail."

But if not it, what remained of those upon Earth would have been consumed in nuclear fire...of the Sun!

"And as for your apology . . .," Rei Takahashi snarls, remembering and NOT forgiving the insults done that made her youngest sister cry.

What did Rin expect? They were not Heroic Spirits!

Fight a war? Yes.

Fight a war inside a city and not cause noise and enough damage to leave clues to the "muggles" that something is going on?! It was a miracle that with the magics they use that . . .

Snarling at the stupidity of it all, Rei ends up giving an obscene jesture with two fingers AND not bothering to see Rin Toksaka, Rei turned and marched off into a blue box to gather up her adventuring party and be DONE with this whole mess! She actually wants a pound of flesh from Rin, but instead . . .

Cut losses and call it a f*ckin' day!

Of course, that was before detecting a bunch of anomolies that should NOT have cropped up on what was to have been a dead world, ripe for the picking with a MASSIVE wish to make it habitable (and more)...

The BIG GLOWING TREE in the distance was one such anomaly...


"Shit," Rei mutters, just shaking her head looking at the readings. The Grail JUST had to have the last laugh...

"At least it's not Yharnam," Rei muttered. "Praise the Sun."

Giving the communicator on her belt a questioning look as it interrupts her quipping.

"Breaker breaker!" a young woman's voice says over the device as Rei activates it. "Angel the Second to the First Children! You have your ears on?"

Rei nearly drops the device as lingering Magicks from that Grail Wish seems to wish to make one last backstab (but actually just fulfilling it's assigned tasked, albeit in a most inconvenient manner).

Delivering them to a world where they could grow and prosper. Can't do that if certain Outer Gods keep doing what they've been trrying to do and the Rot spreads all over the lands, eh?

Honestly, if Lilith had KNOWN that Rei had been so frazzled? So DONE with it all after being FORCED into the Role of the Good Hunter (up to and including having to deal with MOON PRESENCE)?!

The wave of fatigue Lilith was now feeling (and powering through) as the Ceremony's dues catch up with her is telling her that Rei is doubly not in the mood for her humor...

She would have at least not been so flip when attempting to contact sister Rei! Using her old CB "handle" of "Angel the Second" while trying to see see if the "First Children" (aka Rei) or any of the others would have their "ears on" had been funny enough to use at the time.

The looks of the others around her of confusion had been funny enough for a small chuckle. That look on Miquella's face (adding to the slight cute blush he'd taken on after she'd shown interest in at least going on a date). . . .

Priceless!

But . . .ALSO!

Perhaps using that souvenir deck of cards (that one spare deck of the Emperor's Tarot) had been a bad idea? Then again, what with the interference Lilith had been getting at almost every turn from the Erdtree for her less mundane means of scrying and communications? The Emperor's Tarot had that little "something extra" to get through what basically what Lilith mentally calls it screaming magical "interference"!

Ah yes, the Emperor of Mankind? You know, that one chap from the tabletop game Warhammer 40K? The one game who's setting is basically everything cranked up to eleven (at a the least)?

Kind of a given that He has a History with hating Demon Gods, four major ones in particular. Of which, the Demon God of disease and rot is being one of them!

Mayhaps an echo of the Emperor played a part in that over the top display of healing magicks which just hit that poor red headed woman in the background?

Maybe. That guess was as good as any mages and mystics would theories later....

Earlier there? The Emperor had blinked having realized (too late) that the entity on the other side of the Tarot hand that Lilith had dealt on a CHEAPLY made card table, in the Lands Between. He looks out sees that the blow he'd put forth to drive back his Enemy . . .is both much more lethal than intended.

That and the target of His ire is not a Warp entity known as a Demon God at all! But rather soon enough something quiet a bit different, a magical entity we know as an Outer God.

Oh? Why was (Lady) Lilith Quatermain attempting to use Tarot cards of all things here? Why not something more . . .normal?

Well, Lilith had been attempting to use her card deck in a magical communications to attempt to reach out and contact various peoples out in the wider realms of this odd world she'd landed in here. This had been with permission from Lord Godrick (having finally won free from the fretful children from earlier there) so well and good! With the stipulation that the Grafted Scion she'd been traveling with up until now would have her sword drawn, ready to strike her down if Lilith should attempt some kind of betrayal.

Which Lilith understood the idea, even if she didn't exactly appreciate that. And that the kindly Grafted Scion girl should be put into such a position.

At least nobody was yelling for her head. What with that wave of Gold there only striking one young woman, without actually killing her!

Ah? That Gold wave? The healing magicks? Well....

A wave of GOLD hits the blinking crimson haired woman who just happens to be afflicted with said Crimson Rot, and staggers as the power of the Grail hits, and she finds herself on the ground (on her posterior). Feeling something . . .absent now within her and the the unalloyed needle quivering almost like a tuning fork! A tuning fork that is quivering like it had been struck with GREAT force instead of HER quivering like a tuning fork (sort of speak).

"What?!" the young woman blinks, wondering what in the Hells that was about and why her head is spinning so much.

Elsewhere. . . .

A figure stares, looking on as the Lake of Rot's shore. Or rather, the spot where the Rot had ended and receded to something like to a fourth of what it had been until now. Accompanied by a scream of absolute agony and now the soft (but gurgling) crying of a woman somewhere in the distance.

"What the hell?" the holder of the Rune of Death mutters, flummoxed at this latest development.

Looking at the small, blue skinned doll he'd come across elsewhere, earlier . . .

Shaking his head, the Shadow knew that whatever just happened was NOT due to her.

She was . . .truly beyond being able to do anything, good or bad, due to a fatal encounter with her doppelganger

Weird enough that the Boss of his Boss to give an Order that this Shadow NEVER expected to be given (much less be ABLE to follow).

But the Greater Will (for that was what the Entity who'd came to him up in Crumbling Farum Azula . . .

After getting the Fingerslayer Blade in order deal with the traitors? To deal with the puppet masters? The true reason why Queen Marika was as she was now?

What was this latest development? His last target was on the other side of this Lake, but if the Greater Will was able to do THIS while healing the mind of his Queen (shattered after so long from the agony of crucifixion and EVERYTHING ELSE she'd endured while being puppet-ed by the Two Fingers)...

It was with a flash of Gold, but it wasn't the Gold of the Greater Will. Of anything of the Golden Order . . .

It was . . .different . . .Alien!

Also Elsewhere . . .

"Mommy?" a young girl's pain filled voice whimpers, drawing a groan out of a young woman with a golden prosthetic arm.

She had just drawn forth an unalloyed Golden Needle. To die as herself instead of Blossoming/ To rot away to nothing. To have the Tarnished who'd accompanied her here to deliver it to Malenia.

"Where's Mommy?" another young girl's voice asks. "Who's this icky bug?"

"Huh?" The young woman calling herself Millicent mutters intelligently, looking into the golden eyes of . . .five young girls who look VERY familiar Four of them look to be the very "sisters" who'd been out to strike her down. Force her to bloom! "What in the Erdtree is this?!"

But . . .they cannot be those, since they are all . . .three years old! Too young by far. The very ages where they'd come out of the swamp where they'd spawned and the poison their "father" had poured into their ears for years on end, warping them into monsters

But who was this fifth little girl? Who was this face that was so like her own? The one she'd seen in the mirror? Except, why was she also three?!

Who was that shriveled corpse over there? What damnable Kindred of Rot?!

Why was she still here? Where was the pain?

Where was the Rot?

Why hadn't she Rotted away into nothing?

Why did she have a cracking headache about fit to split her skull open? Gods! It was almost like her head was vibrating like a tuning fork.

Groaning softly, Millicent wanted more than anything right then and there to curl up into a ball and just pray that the pain would pass.

"Who are you?" twin adult female voices ask to the left (and right) of the youngsters and Millicent.

Groaning again, M Millicent cracks opens her eyes. Glancing over to where one of the adult's voice came from, Millicent freezes. It was HER!!

"MOMMY!!" a young set of voices behind Millicent screams (apparently being somehow able to throw off whatever had hit them all perhaps due to sheer youthful vigor . . .or just plane luck) followed by the scampering of little feet over to the owner. Passing by Millicent from behind, over next to Malenia! Past some VERY familiar liking three year old red headed girls.


And at the same time? The original group of three year old look confused for a second, first glancing back at the crimson haired demigoddess before them. One standing in a pile of golden limbs, who's staring wide eyed at a health set of limbs.

And then at somebody with the same voice a Malenia before them . . ..

Turning her head, Millicent turns to see the same face and form. One with a similar set of golden limbs, but who's face is marked. Marked with the the splotches and marks of Crimson Rot, but only the very beginning stages of infection.

Off to the side, a US nuclear submarine (the USS Georgia) given human form looks over at a WW2 two Mahan destroyer (USS Oppenheimer) given human form and shakes her head in askance.

Suddenly finding themselves here back on this Earth like world?

Confusing does not even begin to cover it!

What is this latest bit of insanity? These gingers who are looking around now, pained but wondering now after asking who each other were? Little girls who asked their Mommy was (and apparently finding it in the two EIGHT FOOT TALL Valkyrie looking women)?

Now they all were looking around, confused and with more questions!

Like asking where the Erdtree (whatever the hell that was) happened to be?

The towering Amazonian women looking down at the gaggles of three year old girls snuggling (cute as buttons) up to them, clearly split between wanting to protest that they are not their mothers. And wishing to lean down and give them the most loving hugs....

And what in the hell were tarnished and why the concerned looks, when they glanced over at Georgia and the Fleet of ship girls?!

"Do you know these assholes?" USS Georgia asks the former abyssal submarine from the Crossroad Fleet.
 
BOOK FOUR-In a Suddenly Patch Work/Magical World, Is Gunboat Diplomacy the Thing?! Chapter 2:One Thing After Another for the Gingers...
One Thing After Another for the Gingers...

As the Tsukumogami known as the USS Georgia asks that question, all "higher powers", both alien and native, are wondering something similar right now. Having seen a until now unknown "god" having casually brutalized the Outer God known as the Crimson Rot. Injuring it almost to the point where it barely hangs on, too injured to do more right now but lie where it was struck and cry in agony from what the MAGIC of the Holy Grail (ala the Nasu-verse one) did to it.

The Dragging the Rot Goddess had experienced from the spaces between to . . . this new Void had done her no favors as well!

As the other Outer Gods? Some are curious. That is all they can be, considering their alien nature, having no true understanding of . . .death. Cessation of life. Ending of existence.

Some do have those concept, in one way or another. In Varying degrees allowed to their alien nature. So? Those few are are concerned.

VERY CONCERNED!! ESPECIALLY THE GREATER WILL! WHO GOT DRAGGED ALONG FOR THE RIDE AND IS SLUMPED TO THE GROUND WITHIN THE ERDTREE, DIZZY AS #$%#%#$!

"Lilith" had been a concern and something of a mystery. But deemed as not an immediate threat.


A wave of alien magicks of unexpected and powerful origin? Powerful enough to easily snuff out deities without warning?!

THIS kind of thing makes a deity stand back and take notice!!

Who is this newest interloper, and what does he want?!

Are They next?

….

Will the Lands Between be destroyed or warped beyond recognition due to this newcomer?


With USS Georgia

"Do you know these assholes?" I ask my fellow submarine ship-girl, giving up trying to figure out how this gaggle of red heads figure into this latest . . .thing.

"Never laid eyes on them before now," the submarine ship-girl admits, dashing any hope of a quick resolution of mysteriously appearing gingers in our midst.

...

Nothing was over there just a moment ago, and now? BOOM, red heads aplenty!! Didn't do a damn thing about how that fake correspondence from Saratoga got her all the way to Mars. Much less DOWN on the surface of Mars, without a space suit.

Without a NEED for a space suit! What the Hell?!

...


Yeah, anyway! Redheads! Out of the f*cking thin air!! Of which, the two towering red heads are armed with gain FUCK OFF huge KATANNAS. Albeit ones which are currently attached to what look like golden prosthetic arms.

But HEY? ABOUT THAT?

Mere details!


Kind of like how we all got here in this field? Which did what here exactly?!

What is with that FUCKING HUGE GLOWING TREE?!

...

We all just got ROBBED, didn't we! I know we've just got hit by some kind of Random Omnipotent Being! Got to be1!

Hey? ROB, who zapped us all here. Who also forged that paperwork from Saratoga to allow me access through the Gate, onto her Earth and to MARS!!

That stupid idea is about as likely as anything else!!

Jesus Christ on a pogo-stick, this is my life now? I mean being reborn as and Abyssal Submarine Princess is odd at times, I will admit (quietly) to myself, but this?!

,,,,

God, I am going to have so much paperwork and investigations! I JUST KNOW IT!! And I HATE PAPERWORK!!

*Saratoga, do you know anything about a bunch of red heads just magically showing up here?* I radioed over to my long time (albeit sometimes estranged for various reasons) friend, the red haired Lexington class ship-girl, USS Saratoga. *A bunch of little girls with two warrior woman/Valkyrie types? With long hair and armed with some kind of golden katannas of all things by chance, eh?*

Long range communication seems to have gone into the toilet for some reason, but over short distances the radio would do just fine.

Hopefully Saratoga would be able to answer that question. Or at least send a few more bodies in order to sort out this latest thing.

First that scream over by the towers about some Blade guy or sometihing like that! Sounded like a woman in distress, or a trap...

...

SHE could do it. Handle this problem, but . . .people always COMPLAIN on how she handles problems.

No sense of humor at all!

Meanwhile with Malenia, Blade of Miquella (aka the Miquella not renamed Trina)...


"Where is the Erdtree?" the red headed Valkyrie finally giving voice to one of the many questions running through her mind.

Turning to look behind her, she is gladden to see the Erdtree. She'd been seeing it before. Known where it had been, as silent witness for the upcoming duel and . . .

Now here? The Three Sister's rise?!

"Oh Erdtree no," Malenia muttered to herself, not at all looking forward to having to SPEAK to that blue witch EVER again!!

Not her fault! She had NO say in why Ranni's father had abandoned Rennala, Queen of the Full Moon!

Not her or her brother's fault what happened there. Even had put out feelers after the Shattering to try to finally make some . . .accords. Heal severed relations.

Ranni had no call at basically spitting on their offers of friendship and alliance!

'Tis had been a foolish dream on both her and her brother's part alas.

But speaking of dreams?

But what about faint memories of sleep? Of her dreaming?

I dreamt for so long. My flesh was dull gold... and my blood, rotted. Corpse after corpse, left in my wake. As I awaited... his return. ...

Shivering, the crimson sword woman puts that foolishness aside. Why? Since, that made no sense! That dream had been at Brace of the Haligtree. After Finley had . . . .Had . . .had . . .

No! That was a . . .a nightmare! Not true, since she was here and. . .

Did Miquella . . .manage to give BACK to her what had been Severed!?

Many questions are running through her mind, indeed! Questions like... Who are these . . .wonderful children snuggling up to her and calling her "Mommy"? Surely they don't mean her? How in the name of Marika's TITS could she be the little ones' mother, considering that any man who'd ever attempt the . . .acts needed for giving her children was doomed to failure?! The Crimson Rot, It would ruin their dangly bits AND the Rot had seen her to be MOST incapable of bearing children. Dammit.

"Who are thou?" Malenia asks her almost twin (again after being interrupted by her . . .children?), the somewhat shorter red haired woman with a golden prosthetic arm like the one she had been sporting (up until she found herself HERE, replaced with a living flesh and blood one).

...

Why does she have flesh and blood limbs again after the Rot had caused them to ROT away?

Shaking her head slightly--and noting that her identical twin seems to be glancing down at her own limbs and asking herself the same question--Malenia, Blade of Miquella (male edition, but she doesn't know that wrinkle yet), waits for this young woman with the prosthetic arm to speak.

That and being content to let the crowd of odd Tarnished people (and other people with appearances somewhat akin to Misbegotten and Demi-humans) stay well away from them for the moment. If they showed no hostility to her and hers? She'd return the courtesy. AT least until she gets this first part sorted out...

THAT was the way she felt this entire SITUATION she'd suddenly found herself in unexpectedly should be handled.

So! With that?

With the Red Haired Young Woman with the golden prosthesis..

"My-my name is Millicent," the red haired young sword maiden stutters while tightly holding her unalloyed golden needle. "I came from a long ways away to deliver this to you. I-I believe I am somehow related to you? A daughter or sister?"

A little red head three year old girl with a familiar name...

"But I'mma Melina," one of the little red haired girls who looked . . .disturbingly familiar to the golden prothesised warrior woman. A tiny girl who, like those in her group, are being mostly ignored in favor of the adults talking and trying to figure out what in the @#$@#$ is going on here.

"Me too," the twin of the first little girl echoes. "Maybe she like how we have two Mommies and all stuff like this?"

"Let's share Mommies and names then with her?" the Pollyanna still snuggling. "And maybe have her as Big Sister?"

Soft mutterings soon come to some kind of consensuses, some of which will bring consternation to the adults...

Meanwhile, back with "Big Sister" Melina...

Having said what she had said...

The last part is delivered with more than a little trace of hope. In what she'd thought would have been her last moments, she's settled on the idea and hope that the Tarnished she'd traveled with would deliver the Unalloyed Gold Needle to Malenia. To restore her dignity...

Of course, that plan had been with the understanding that there was just ONE Malenia.

And what was it with all those little girls (two of which just strike her as so . . .familiar)?

"Where did thou . . .?" Malenia blinks, knowing that that thing had gotten misplaced during her fight with that brother kidnapping scum, Radahn.

"MAKE A HOLE!" a female's voice interrupts whatever the red headed demigoddess was exactly to ask. The owner sounded just a bit put out over everything right now, shall we say. Concerned, if nothing else.

Turning in consternation, BOTH Malenias look to the source of the voice.

The wall of oddly dressed woman Tarnished (for what else could they be without the golden grace in their eyes) parts way to show a small odd gathering of people.

The red haired and uniformed woman with long hair has an air of command to her and seems (somehow) to have been the source of the voice. However, she is not the one that draws all but a slither of their attention.

One Malania turned to the other, and noted the signs of Crimson Rot on her twin's face. Where as she seemed to be missing ANY signs of Rot infestation, for now...

It wasn't as if . . .the Rot got cured, right?

Right?!

But that said? Best to put things right for now! Her sister would need that Needle that her . . .daughter? . . .had. If only to keep the Scarlet Rot at bay AND to keep these strange Tarnished . . .non-hostile.

Hostility would be met with hostility, but the Tarnished had been . . .non-hotile. Best to keep things as non-hostile as possible, especially considering it would put her dear daughter in harm's way. . . .!

!

The Crimson Valkyrie stumbled over that word: daughters. Only to power on.

Whatever these little girls actually WERE in the scheme of things? Best not hav battle, since that ran the risk of them getting caught in the crossfire!

Wordlessly after taking the needle from Milicent and placing it into her twin's hand. The thing had been MADE by dear Miquella for a Damn good reason. While both warrior woman had been able to manage to resist the call of the Crimson Rot in the past, better to have it in place to needlessly risk things, right? That and while not widely advertised the totality of her Curse? A normal person would/should know enough about Miquella the Unalloyed efforts with unalloyed gold treatment for his sister, the Valkyries reasoned. Seeing it out would send all sorts of wrong signals to panicky peasants and Tarnished, right?

But while asking questoins . . .

Why in the name of the gods and goddesses was it OUT in the first place?

A quick turning aside to provide some form of privacy, the needle is quickly placed and the grownup red heads turn to speak with the approaching shipgirls.

The roar of outrage from awaken dragons blasted that effort to Hell and Gone...

Nearer the tower where the screaming had come from earlier....

"Dragons?!" screamed Trinitite, not believing her viewfinders at all!

But real dragons or falsely named monster lizards? The aircraft carrier girl was pulling out her weaponry for a fight!! Her and her sisters who'd gone forth to lend aid.
 
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BOOK FOUR-In a Suddenly Patch Work/Magical World, Is Gunboat Diplomacy the Thing?! Chapter 2: Reasonable Dragons, Crying Princesses, and Heavy Metal Burglar Alarms....
Reasonable Dragons, Crying Princesses, and Heavy Metal Burglar Alarms....

"Dragons?!" screamed Trinitite, not believing her rangefinders at all!

But real dragons or falsely named monster lizards? The aircraft carrier girl was pulling out her weaponry for a fight!! Her and her sisters who'd gone forth to lend aid.

Now, how do you think this will end?

. . . .

Well, if you thought that the two Glintstone Dragon Adulas were going to get good and lit up by all the warships weaponry facing them? You would be wrong. Nor was there a terrible battle to break out between the dragons once they became aware of each other, and looked at each other. Eye to eye.

Now! For the uninitiated? Or those who've just dropped into the middle of things without reading the last few chapters/episodes? In certain tales from Germany, there are these things called doppelgangers. Doppelgangers are defined as this (as taken from "Oxford Languages", online): A doppelganger is a mysterious, exact double of a living person. It's a German word that literally translates to "double walker" or "double goer". A doppelganger isn't someone who just resembles you, but is an exact double, right down to the way you walk, act, talk, and dress.

Yeah, tales can vary what that means and what comes from having that apparition double around for an unfortunate. But in the case here with "Invaders" who just happen to drop into the Lands Between had happen to come across their mirror selves?

Usually as you may guess? They flip out. Some kind of mystical/magical/psychic THINGY happens. They look into the other's soul and don't like what they see. CANNOT stand what they see because it shows something they cannot stand to acknowledge within themselves, as corny as it sounds. They try to kill each other. At least, that is what usually has happened, in the rare instances that such meetings took place.

Thus is what happened with Preceptor Seluvis meeting his Invader/Doppelganger. Both went practically insane in rage at what they saw in the other. Their egos just couldn't take it. And they didn't care to hold back in their battle over little things like collateral damage/endangering the life of their mistress, Lady Ranni.

And Blaidd put BOTH down for endangering Lady Ranni (and THOSE two identical . . . sisters or whatever they actually were).

Could go on here about how it can go lethal for such encounters.

This isn't one of THOSE, though...

"You have pretty eyes," both female dragons mutter, entranced. "Glittering scales. Powerful wings . . ."

Yeah, kind of the opposite.

Love at first sight, and since dragons are known for being rather vain creatures (and poor Adula is rather vain)...


And the compliments? Each gives the other heartfelt compliments, only to blink after SOMETHING in their hind brain (or just plain COMMON SENSE!!) tells them that turning their attention AWAY from the large grouping of TARNISHED is a very BAD idea. They look human, but...There is something decidedly OFF about these intruders.

. . .

Or whatever in the HELL THESE people are!! Both dragons just got the scent coming off of the various women before them. Smells of saltpeter (potassium nitrate), sulfur, and charcoal do not spell out the ingredients of smokeless powder (and all that is related with navel shells and such). However, that and other decidedly ODD metallic smells and just . . . weird "vibes" that the dragons are now sensing.

And, why do they keep seeing a faint image of what looks to be some kind of vehicles . . .that look vaguely like some kind of sea going vessels.

Oh, they have no set of sails like traditional wooden ships, but . . .they are ships. But are also human seeming entities.

They are not Tarnished. THEY ARE not even HUMAN!

And what are those crossbow looking weapons being aimed at both dragons and why does that give the dragons feelings of dread within their bellies?

The last time they'd ignored such a foreboding feeling within their gut had been with their now mistresses, Lunar Princess Ranni. And both dragons remembered how THAT battle had panned out.

While it had not ended in death, and their knightly vow of service to the Lunar Princess had not been arduous?

No, best not rush into this.

....

Especially with who seems to be keeping these (not) Tarnished company!

Why was Malenia the Severed here? And twinned like they, the dragons, had been whilst asleep!

One dragoness recalled some nonsense a visiting mage Tarnished about this situation: invaders.

But weren't invaders supposed to be . . .hostile?

"Who are you?" one of the Glintstone Dragons named Adula growls out, putting on a brave front after shaking her scaly head to clear it of useless questions. "Why are you trespassing on my . . .our mistress' lands?"

The other dragoness starts and stares at her twin, wondering just HOW her sister (for want of a better term) just managed that! Usually she had to make do with gestures and nods to convey meaning and questions. Communication "verbally" as what she was familiar with her fellow dragons being able to do? It had shattered more than a few windows in Ranni's Rise (and caused her ration of Glintstone for her scales to be cut for a unacceptable amount of time)!

. . .

Why are the windows to Seluvis' Rise all shattered? And large portions of said Rise blown out?

Surely . . .it wasn't possible that they somehow SLEPT through THAT?! Both of them w-were only resting their eyes and surely would have . . .

"We heard the lady in the tower over there screaming about somebody named Blaidd," Trinitite says, venturing to perhaps cut off a fight with something out of mythology before whatever issue that seems to have caused these dragons pause wears off. "But hold that thought!"

"AHOY IN THE TOWER!!" the former Abyssal aircraft carrier shipgirl shouts, wishing VERY much to short circuit a battle here. "DO YOU NEED ASSISTANCE!"

Several surprised shouts are heard from within the tower confines before one red haired woman comes rushing out, looking most stressed out indeed.

"We cannot get the bleeding to stop!!" Ranni (the one who'd rushed out to see who had haled those within Seluvis' Rise) gasps desperately. "Please! Come in and help!"

Now, by now it is a given that Ranni (all three of them) are now much more . . .naive and trusting than they'd REMEMBERED. Ranni always had an angle. A plan.

This? The way Ranni is acting is well outside of what the female dragons know of her.

This and the fact that BOTH dragons recall their mistress being . . .well . . . no longer having an organic body? Back in her original body to boot?

Of course both things cause the dragons pause! A pause which Saratoga, former Abyssal Princess/now Admiral of her fleet takes full advantage of here, seeing a possible avenue to perhaps find out the answer to a few questions. Things like just what in the world is going on here? Just why and how they found themselves here?

What is the status of her space station?

Where was her grand daughter? Hopefully she still was up in her bed on the space station, safe and sound.

Hell, Saratoga hoped that the space station was still MANNED instead of everyone somehow getting beamed down (or whatever the HELL had happened here) to the surface!!

Up in the Space Station....

Soft snoring can be heard from Trinitite's little girl, snuggling her doll as she dreams the dreams of the innocent as she flies over the "Lands Between". A place which could be said to have a LOT of very NOT "innocent" people...

She sleeps, as the remaining human crew aboard the space station are running about trying to locate suddenly missing commanders and various shipgirls...

Back down on Mars, at the "Three Sisters Rise"....

"Alamogordo, Firestorm, and Groves," Saratoga barks out, gesturing to each in turn and then waving over towards the tower. "Go in and lend aid as much as possible for Blaidd!"

Named shipgirls rush off into the tower to lend aid (or deal out punishment if this should turn out to be some form of trap).

Say what you will about the shortcomings of the "on shore defense weapon systems" each shipgirl was outfitted with in her fleet? While not nearly as powerful as their more traditional weaponry for sea use? It was able to be fired ON Land without becoming a geometry problem (IE firing it off wouldn't cause the poor shipgirl to go flying from recoil). And was (hopefully) more than powerful enough to put a serious hurt on any monsters about.

Like say . . . a glint stone dragoness or two if they get uppity?



Ignoring slight hesitation from the three shipgirls when they see something unexpected within the tower before continuing on inside, Saratoga turns back towards the blinking dragons.

Good! They weren't attacking since the lady of the house (tower) gave tacit approval for her daughters to help this Blaidd person!!

Well....

Actually, both Adulas are doing that And are being a bit . . .reserved about the fact that the BANE of Caelid within their midst. So while they are abiding with their mistress' wishes (though at a loss as to why Ranni cannot magically heal Blaidd), there is the fact that they do NOT want to draw the ire of the Crimson Valkyrie over there, considering the Crimson Rot. The fact that Malenia was a demigoddess who'd never known defeat (IE the dragons didn't wish to die at Malenia's blade, knightly vow or not). . .

They'd fly off, but they HAD vowed to protect Ranni....who didn't seem to be herself.



Well, besides the fact that she was back in her Living/breathing body!

Ranni was decidedly . . .off.

"Now!" Saratoga continues, taking on the air of command only a former Princess turned Admiral could muster on such short notice. In a lot of cases, the best way to handle emergencies is to appear to know instinctively to know what is what and what to do so... "Let us share a bit!"

So? What do she do with this rather colorful and diverse cast before her? She introduces herself and her fleet, that is what she does here. That and . . .makes sure as to confirm with Ranni (the apparent owner of these lands here and "mistress" of the Glintstone female dragons) that her daughters do INDEED have the green light for BEING here. For being ALLOWED to aid this Blaidd person, who according to her daughters who silently contact her by radio is a half wolf/human person.


A lightning round of introductions is made between the shipgirls (and one husband) with the rest of the group. Those of the Lands Between are not sure what to make of Sarratogs's fleet and the nation/kingdom/whatever she says she belongs with, but that gets sidetracked.

First by the sheer/unadulterated cuteness of when Pollyanna (and Pollyanna 2) give their own introductions, adding before both Malenia's can give the usual introduction of them being "Malenia, Blade of Miquella" both Pollyannas introducing them as "Mommy" and "Mommy 2".

"Because both of them are our mommies!" the other Pollyanna giggles after Hypocenter asked them.

This garners a slight chuckle from the shipgirls, who have seen similar family situations between various former princesses and former common Abyssals. Given how often common Abyssals had died in service to one Abyssal Princess only to be re-summoned by another Princess during the Abyssal War? How Common Abyssals viewed their Princess as their mother which in turn sometimes meant that a motherly connection in return forming between summoner and summoned?

Makes for VERY interesting family trees by human standards, and leave at that.

And something similar was happening here, apparently.

Both Malenias gape at each other as if asking how'd this had happen, but shake off their shock and opt on tacking it LATER. When they have the TIME for it.

What with all the oddities about? Besides the unexpected children (who've apparently unilaterally ADOPTED them both as parents)? These oddly dressed not-Tarnished (who look human but give off definitely NON-human vibes)?

The fact that the moons have either disappeared or turned into tiny little rocks in the sky? Also that the horizon is now much closer than it should be?

The last two is what is being ignored with MUCH effort. Dammit Ranni, why does she have to cast this sort of disconcerting illusions when visitors visit!

Amazing what lies even demigods tell themselves sometime!



But that said?

One of the blinking Malenia asks about getting drafted into parenthood without even a "by your leave" by these . . .wonderful children.

This was their life now, apparently.

Well! At least it seemed like their Scarlet Rot wasn't acting up as usual. For one of the Malenias it was almost as if it wasn't even there at all, but that was crazy!

Right? Right?!

...

Tree dammit, that witch always needed to mess with her or Miquella's envoy's senses every time when visiting.

EVERY TIME!!

Indeed! Rumors that her sister had done the same thing as some sort of trap for any would be conquering Tarnished who'd dare invade her mother's academy to claim Renalla's Great Rune, but even more mind bending than this little display!

"That's nice child," Hypocenter smiles, clearly wishing to just get ON with things here (like getting BACK in touch with the space station and the planet side colony facilities). Still, the little tykes had been cute enough to warrant SOME patience here. "By chance do they go by any other names besides that?"

"Uh," Pollyanna blinks, looking confused for a second before looking over to her younger siblings for an answer. The other three years olds look at each other and realize . . .they have no clue! Why would "Mommy" and "Mommy 2" need any other name?!

"I am Malenia," Malenia 2 (aka the Malenia with Miquella's Needle stuck within her) proclaims, pride evident within her voice to all. "Blade of Miquella."

Gods, she missed her sister! Hopefully she could rescue her after her business in Caelid and teaching that treacherous bastard a lesson he would NEVER forget!

The Red Valkyrie then cuts herself off with an embarrassed cough, not wishing to complete the last part of that introduction. First, these people before her were NOT some kind of hostile Tarnished, coming to plunder. Second, in fact these people had not made a hostile move or expressed a violent intention since go. Finally, except for the young man of this group was NOT of the Tarnished ilk for both demigoddesses knew this odd "fleet" before here only LOOKED human. And not only were they not human, but their battle instincts screamed that this fleet was compose of very POWERFUL human looking (but not human) people.

Having never known defeat in battle did not mean that the Malenia's would stupidly charge into battle. Great way to get into a battle they didn't want and was a great way make needless enemies of potential allies (or friends).

No need to be rude....

"'Tis my name as well," Malenia (2), Blade of Miquella, adds before shaking her head slightly in consternation. She and her brother Miquella might need to go and figure out a new title if this "invader" business failed to end. Whoever was actually the "invader" might be stuck here for a LONG time...

"By chance does either your mothers or Lady Ranni here know just why and how my Fleet and I have found ourselves here?" Saratoga gently asked the precocious girl, while giving the grownups of Malenia's group a meaningful glance.

And while we are it it why is everyone so much TALLER than me and the girls? Saratoga thinks to herself while waiting for an answer.

Both warrior demigoddesses would have taken issue with the red headed shipgirl for such questions, if it hadn't been so polite in it's asking (or only asked within Saratoga's mind).

Saratoga was had the appearance of one of the Small Folk/Peasants by her stature (being only two thirds of Malenia's height). There was the matter of stations, after all so . . . the Red headed Aircraft carrier girl would have been reprimanded Harshly back at the capital.

Then again . . .there had been many reasons for getting AWAY from the capital! And so . . .why be so snobbish? Were not ship's captains (and admiralty by association) a form of royalty in their own fashion?! That and AGAIN must it be stated the unearthly vibes Saratoga and her "Fleet" were giving off here?!

"No we do not know how you arrived here," Malenia 1 sighs, after placing a hand upon Pollyanna 1's after the little girl shook it to show she had no idea. Frowning slightly, and facing Ranni.

"I . . .I fear I cannot say whether or not I somehow brought all of you forth here," Ranni begins, twitching nervously. "Neither I nor my sisters within Seluvis' Rise even recalled our very names until the kindly wolf man Blaidd . . ."

Ranni reveals to the others about how she (and her sisters) had found themselves alone and afraid, with only a shattered blue doll (with an idiotically big hat) to keep them company. How Blaidd had appeared. How after being alarmed at all three (!) Rannis

How another wolf-man, a veritable twin to Blaidd, had jumped and started attacking Blaidd. Interrupting the kindly wolf man before much more than mere names could be shared.

How rude!

And after defeating and killing that vile wolf man/assassin Blaidd had taken her (and gathering up the idiotic blue shattered doll) to see Seluvis to aid Ranni. After a brief argument between Blaidd and Seluvis, a fell twin showed up within the Rise which led to a crazed battle between Seluvis and twin. A battle which cared not about how deadly it turned. About how Blaidd had no choice in having to END both before the fools killed Ranni and Blaidd.

"And Blaidd fell due his wounds and lacking a means for healing them," Ranni finishes, voice shaking slightly with repressed emotion. A lone tear runs down her face and onto her mage cloak. "Mayhaps I or one of my sisters brought you all here inadvertently Mayhaps some unexpected side effect caused both noble Adula to slumber whilst Blaidd had slew Seluvis and his fell twin.

"And I cannot tell you anything more than this," Ranni finished, shivering.

She felt so . . .empty. Lost.

She felt she'd lost . . . nearly everything.

Hells, she still didn't even know what the name of this kingdom she was dwelling within now.

Even the name of that giant glowing tree? No. Nothing. She had no idea what it's name was.

Would she and her sisters ever be whole again?

"You do not even know me?" Malenia 1 asked, appalled at the state Ranni was in. Nothing of the cold but knowledgeable magic user was before her. Nothing of the aloof Empyrean who'd rebuffed both Malenia's and her brother's offers of aid and alliance. "Of . . .you being the daughter of Radagon? My father Radagon? Us . . .being sisters?"

Well, half sisters but still!!

Silly questions like HOW in the Erdtree was she flesh and blood again (and what was this about sisters) had to wait. This was MUCH more important!!

"No," Ranni whispered, shaking as more tears fell.

The shipgirls outside (as well as the ones inside the Rise who'd been listening in via radio through Saratoga) look uncomfortable at Ranni's obvious distress.

Putting aside all the insults and snide comments, both Malenia's come over and softly hug the crying Lunar Princess. And would have added a promise to help Ranni by enlisting Miquella after rescuing him from Radahn over in Caelid.

Which could have lead to the questions raising around in both Adulas heads about why Caelid no longer seemed to have that red haze it had gain ever since Malenia (whichever one was the actual native one of this world) had unleashed the Scarlet Rot upon it.

That could have lead to all sorts of interesting revelations, but of COURSE something had to interrupt!

Back over near the spot where Blaidd had come across three amnesia suffering Lunar Princesses (and fought and killed a hostile twin)....

SLAM-SLAM-SLAM-SLAM!!

The metallic tone of metal impacting metal, like two sheets of HY-80 Hull Steel meeting HY-80 Hull steel can be heard for mile and miles, muffling the screams of sheer agony as the anti-theft contingency being enacted by a VI that had been created by a . . . .rather eccentric heavy metal loving fanatic plays out a lively drum cover for one the more obscure (and barely talented) heavy metal artists of the 21rst century from a place called . . .

Earth.

"STOP! STOP!!" screamed Patches, heartily now regretting MOST thoroughly not having listened to the verbal warnings from the items he'd . . .borrowed from that set of unconscious warrior types (with wings on their back, odd). "GET OFF ME! Get OFF ME!! GET THE BLOODY HELL OFF MEEEE!!!"

Falling to the ground, Patches realized It was turning out that was a VERY bad idea!

Patches had paused in concern that the shinnies he'd picked up would actually speak, but had thought it a bluff.

Then some kind of black metallic helmet had magically appeared over his head (and eyes, blinding him) right before what felt like war hammers started slamming into said helmet. It should have broken his neck, if impacts weren't illusion (albeit inflicting REAL pain). The noise should have shattered his eardrums, but the anti-theft measure was only set for non-lethal (and an built in auto heal feature kept the eardrum intact, small mercies).



The racket would either draw the VI's owner to here for recovery. Or it would draw the authorities to arrest this thief

Still screaming and struggling to rip the magical helmet off of his head (and finding the magicks not allowing removal), two winged (and armored) figures land nearby.

"Memetic hazard!" shouted the female of the group. "Desist!!"

The beeping from the VI almost sounded . . .disappointed before the "burglar alarm" ceases, and the magic metallic helmet vanished from said thief

"So. . . are you the asshole who just set off that alarm that's fucking loud enough to wake the dead?" John Conner Quaterman growled, not at all liking the four alarm headache both that teleport here AND the racket had inflicted upon him and his wife. "Ah, fuggit!!"

A stun blast from an energy weapon that Patches hadn't burgled (due to not recognizing it as a weapon) silences anything the smarmy sometimes merchant would have said.

"And now . . .oh shit," John mutters, looking over at the very dead wolf man/ fighter off to the side of this taboo.
 
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Book Four-In Which the Bear-zilla Clan Gets Excaliber-ated (and Malenia Too, ALMOST)!!
Book Four-In Which the Bear-zilla Clan Gets Excaliber-ated (and Malenia Too, ALMOST)!!

Moments later...

John


What is with this place? I MEAN SERIOUSLY!!

Yeah, well... This is how it started out before that . . .thing with a wave motion SWORD!!

I and Yuki?


View: https://i.imgur.com/tOjmQeY.jpg

Well, we had just come across a dead wolf . . .man. A huge wolf man armed with a slab of metal like that one Japanes manga Berzerk (except a lot more ornate). Did you forget that said wolfman (dressed in armor), is dead?

Did the bald headed thief we just dealt with here KILL this guy, maybe? Don't know how he would have managed it, considering the size difference and all, but...

...

But that is getting side tracked.

Get WITH IT JOHN!!

When we had a bunch of visitors coming out of the woods and around the corner of the building? It looks bad. For ME and Yuki! Several ways, you see.

In one way we have the red headed warrior/valkyrie (?) with a huge Katana in had barreling around, probably investigating the source of all that noise and sees two unknowns hovering over a dead body.

Probably thinking WE killed said wolf man and isn't a fan of that, by the way she is looking rather hostile right now. Or maybe we had something on our faces, the red head was reacting like we were the spawn of Satan or something.

Called us tarnished, or something like that. No idea what that was exactly addressing, but . . . the obvious thing was We were here and she didn't like it, whatever the case!

Then there was the small pack (or whatever the proper term you're supposed to use) of the biggest GOD DAMNED BEARS I HAVE EVER seen! I mean Bear-zilla! Bears the size of small houses big!!

Big or not? I mean a bunch of banging noise like that you'd think would drive AWAY wild animals, not attract them to you in the forest! Back on Earth we'd done enough to teach these oversized Yogi Bear rejects that us human beings are right BASTARDS and they'd better fuck off and leave!! But this ain't Earth. Nope!! Even though EXCEPT for that big ASS glowy fantasy tree off yonder, a lot looks LIKE Earth. So forgive me for being extra surprised!

"BEARS!!" both I and Yuki scream as we grab for weapons to DEAL with it! That and activate what basically boiled down to built in magicks woven within our armor. What basically amounted to what in AD&D would be called "Haste".

….

But without EVERY downside you'd read about in the Player's Handbook.

Oh! But we're going to be feeling IT after all this is said and done, damnit. And we both are feeling like total ASS from that rough ride HERE. Where Ever "Here" is, this place!

,,,,

So! When you see a bunch of bears running your way (at you)? And while there is a red headed (VERY tall) warrior woman who's hostile towards you but not attacking?

I and Yuki (mostly me), opted on handling the BEAR-zilla threat first, being that they were the bigger (by every meaning of the word) problem before us.

I pull out one of the very SPECIAL weapons from the bag . . .

The BAG OF HOLDING in all but name. The one which has a very quirky anti-theft measure device I'd slapped onto it due to having made a VERY sincere promise to a VERY powerful someone you just do NOT WANT to break a promise to without doing your damn best in keeping.

But I seemed to have pulled out one of the ODDER ones of all the ones we'd found laying about wither and yon from prior battles in a modern (early 21rst century) Japanese Earth city. Battles between what amounted to artificial gods...

Made even more insane sounding when said city is in a weird time warp and...

Fuggit, I messed up! I grabbed one of the magic swords that was much more powerful than what the Queen used, prior to her transcendence.

But in my defence, we were in a hurry so . . .mistakes were made!

Malenia, Sword of Miquella

"Rune Bear!" I shout seconds after these young looking Tarnished shout out, gesturing towards a small family of Rune Bears that loud metallic cacophony had summoned.

Mayhaps these Tarnished are not totally without honor? That perhaps some accord could be struck where blood needn't be shed. Fine and well, if they can be reasoned with afterwards and are not blinded by greed in seeking my and my sisters' Great Shards. Blinded by greed in seeking the throne of the Elden Lord and . . .!?

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Fate/Prototype - Excaliber


Fate/Prototype - Excaliber


A flash of bright, holy light all but blinds the red headed warrior maiden. And when her eyes clear after a few moments, the warrior woman finds . . . not only are the Rune Bears no longer attacking. . . .they and basically the entire forest BEYOND them for a frightening long ways away has been . . .

Deleted. Leaving only smoldering stumps and fused, glass like dirt in it's wake where that beam of light had struck!!

No fires, but . . .

Malenia stumbles out of winding up to unleash her special move-- the Waterfowl Dance—upon the approaching ursine menace. Stumbles out of dashing before the Tarnished couple and instead looking back at the male Tarnished who'd now collapsed into a groaning heap, holding the most beautiful sword she'd EVER laid eyes upon.

"Parley?" the young sounding man (barely) gasps, looking up at the slack jawed demi-goddess. "We-we can explain!"

"What in the bloody HELL is going on?!" Patches whispers, having awoken to THIS. Blinking golden (let that statement roll around in your mind in it's implication) eyes, he suddenly finds himself staring cross eyed at a crossbow looking weapon pointed at his face by a very irate looking young woman (in a strange, brown colored, armor).

Okay, cards on table. These new randos? They aren't here to be the overpowered saviors swooping in to overpower the story. They just got done with fighting in a fight where they were almost comedically underpowered by the Fate Stay Night setting. Elsewhere? Well . . .It won't be a curb stomp due to . . .things. There are better ways than battle, you know?
Annoyed Catholic threw 1 20-faced dice. Reason: John Pushing his Luck... Total: 6
6 6
 
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