Guest Omake - Three Phone Calls and a Coda
- Location
- the wrong state
Oh, it's been too long since I've tried this, but here goes:
(In the end, I might have written way too much. But it's Friday and this was a great de-stress exercise.)
An omake of an omake of a fanfiction - to be absolutely clear this is an immediate continuation of the "Help Wanted" sidestory.
edit: a most annoying missing word
Three Phone Calls and a Coda
Taylor punched in a phone number as her guest watched. Tali appeared slightly bemused by the manual addressing system, then took a polite step backwards so she wouldn't accidentally overhear the far side of the conversation.
"Hi, Brendan! Am I interrupting anything?"
...
"That's awfully nice of you to say, but you've got to have some time off duty."
...
"Don't make me invent something to make you rela-"
...!
"No, no, I was just joking. Sorry."
...
"That's a bit of a funny story; so, um, you know I have a little lab in the basement at home. And I have a lot of, uh, experimental gear I've built over the years. Prototypes, and some interesting computing gear, tools and machining, and an awful lot of really, uh, esoteric sensors."
...?!?
"No, no, nonono, everything is fine. Here."
...
"Well, that's kinda the thing. So I picked up a really wonky signal after school on Friday - it was really unique, popping right out of the subspace background noise, and I mighta pulled an all-nighter building a new bit of gear to look at it better."
...?
"Subspace is... well, maybe about three major papers away? It's sorta hinted at in the frame regenerator docs, but ultimately maybe kinda space-time for space-times? The math is beautiful."
...
"You haven't seen our high-school textbooks. Anyway, pretty soon I'd teased out the audio and video streams, and built something which could reply. We traded codecs, and then we traded dictionaries-"
...?
"About seven thousand light-years and-"
...!!!
"-and a bunch of universes away. Huh, I really need to develop a system for notating distance in subspace. But that doesn't matter now-"
...?!?
"BECAUSE, I helped her build a teleporter pair and we got her off that shipwreck she was trapped in."
"...Brendan? General Calhoun? Are you okay"
... ...
"Yes. No, not at all. Yes, her name is Tali. Yes, I compiled a full lexical update to add English to her already-robust translator system, so communication is not an issue."
...?
"She has some inherited immune deficiencies, and she's worried about radiation exposure from the wreck, but I've got the world's greatest healer heading over so-"
...!
"Amy can keep a secret. We'll have to read her in on a few things, but it gives you a reason to fund her during this separation period and help get that mess under control. Everyone wins, especially my new, slightly-purple friend."
...
"Some pictures and notes are already in your secure email. There is some kind of chemical mismatch issue so we'll have to figure out how to feed her long term, but The Great Amy can probably help with that one way or another."
...
"I had a few hours to think through the details while Tali was putting the teleport endpoint together. General, while she is alone, and mostly helpless, and further from her home than any Quarian has ever been," Taylor looked away from the phone to grin disarmingly at her guest. "There will be no dissections, is that clear?"
...?
"No, she didn't say that. She's young, and grounded, and doesn't seem to really be interested in politics that much. A sensible engineering type though that collapsible space shotgun looks somewhat badass. I think we'll get along great."
-----
Danny was driving back from the store when his phone rang. He was at a stoplight so he looked down to see the incoming number. Taylor did not tend to call him very often, so...
He made a lane change when traffic started moving again, then pulled off into a big-box parking lot, and dialed her back.
"Hi, Taylor." He really didn't want to ask if everything was all right. Please let her be-
Okay, that was something new. "A... guest?"
"Wait, is this one of the guys whose class you've been interdimensionally stalking?"
"Okay, someone new who you rescued from slow starvation in an interstellar spacewreck. ...do I need to buy extra food?"
"Oh, dear. I suppose you've called Brendan already? I imagine that they'll want to take her... I don't know, at least to Gravtec-"
It was good to hear Taylor thinking about the world as more than just purely science and engineering, but starting with bug-eyed monsters staying overnight was more than Danny had expected to deal with today.
"I suppose this will send a message, but will she fit in our guest bed?"
"What do you mean, she's not a Krogan?"
-----
Brendan Calhoun very carefully put the phone down again, sighed, and rested his forehead on his hands.
Eventually he straightened up and began to make the most important phone call of his life. His secure phone had a programmed number for the White House switchboard, but he actually needed to look up the code needed for the situation. That meant unlocking the drawer, pulling out the red binder...
He flipped two pages in, ran his finger down the contingency list, tapped the best-fit case twice, and dialed.
"Yes, this is General Calhoun. Priority code. Papa. Alpha. Alpha. Golf. One. Beta. Yes, I'll hold."
White House hold music was... not good. But he'd never heard a repeat song, there were no obnoxious advertisements - at least not with this administration - and unlike with a few software vendors he'd had the misfortune of calling it was not actively trying to put him to sleep.
"Mister President. Yes. We have a situation, though not a threatening one at this time. The Prime Asset has had a little adventure this weekend, with her usual world-changing results. And we're - carefully - going to need to deal with the results."
"That's about what I said, sir. Now, don't panic, but the Prime Asset detected a cross-universal signal, built what I think is an FTL - probably instantaneous - communication system, established communications with the lifeform at the other end, and assisted it - her, apparently - out of a bad situation by building a teleporter which brought the alien to Brockton Bay."
Brendan resisted the urge to pull the phone away from his ear, but he did reach over and turn the volume down three steps.
"No, sir. Apparently she was able to do this with sensors, computing equipment, and assorted hardware she had laying around her basement."
"It didn't sound like Miss Hebert was keeping her in the basement, sir. But she did insist on allowing Tali - that's apparently the alien's personal name - to stay the night at her family home. And I had to assure her that we would treat her guest well."
He reached up to rub the bridge of his nose, where the first strains of a tension headache were rising. One of his least-favorite department secretaries was apparently in the room...
"Yes, sir. I'm looking at the notes, and some pictures, and I'm pretty sure I've not heard of the Prime Asset ever pulling any pranks ever. She even sent over some of the math involved though that may be above everyone's head. Except hers, of course."
Brendan decided it was annoying that everyone assumed the military wanted to dissect aliens.
"No, sir, we don't do that, sir. And sir, you know what the Prime Asset did with some random bits of tinkertech - what do you think she can do with assistance of an actual alien starship engineer? One who by the way probably owes her continued existence to a personal rescue by the Prime Asset. And if I'm understanding correctly, there's a whole - though fairly shot up - starship at the other end of the teleporter we can examine. Possibly somewhat radioactive."
By this time there were multiple cabinet officials in the room with the president, and all of them sounded a little excited.
Brendan nodded. "I think most of the intelligence agencies will play ball - they already were, even before we started distributing the cloak units. The PRT continues to be a problem, of course, and we really need to expand the security perimeter even farther. I've already got the neighborhood teams on alert and doubled up tonight, but actually sending military forces to secure the Hebert house would likely not be appreciated and attract unwanted attention anyway."
It seemed like the President was calming down, which was good. Even better, he seemed to be thinking intelligently about the next steps.
"Yessir. Brockton Bay doesn't have any hotels I'd really want to host a VIP of this tier at anyway, and that would be far too public. We might be able to cover her as a parahuman, but... I think it's better to control the situation more tightly. I think my next step is going to be to get a crash remodeling of some warehouse space at Gravtec into luxury quarters started - though I have no clue as to what amenities a... Quarian? A Quarian would prefer."
"Sorry sir, there's apparently some glitch with food, so a fruit basket might not be appreciated. Though the Prime Asset has brought Panacea in on this and maybe she'll be able to do something about that? The summary I have indicates she's young and more a technical type - if you want to meet her I'm sure we can make that happen but maybe let's get her settled first..."
It was going to be a long, long weekend.
-----
Amy was feeling a little harried as she arrived at Taylor's home in a taxi. She marched right in through the unlocked front door, not paying nearly enough attention to notice the dozen watchers behind darkened windows in the surrounding houses.
"Taylor! Where are you? I don't have time for this - I've gotten three voicemails from one of my emergency contacts in the last ten minutes. And what did you do to that poor taxi company? I've never had such good service on a weekend!"
Her friend's lanky form emerged from the basement stairwell. "No sweat, Amy - they were just going to send you here, anyway. And the taxi guys must have told the driver about the company name on the card."
Amy's phone buzzed again. "That's my Pentagon contact, Taylor! They never call me unless the shit is really deep. I don't have time for a house call!"
Taylor's grin only seemed to expand. "This house call IS the national emergency. Trust me."
A second slender figure came up out of the stairwell, this one wearing a stylized full-body-coverage environmental suit in lavender and black with some strange fashion highlights. Definitely female, though the gloved hand on the bannister didn't have the right number of fingers and those legs were absolutely not jointed normally.
"I can't do anything about Case 53's, Taylor. Sorry, whoever you are, but I need-"
"Tali isn't a Case 53. We need to make sure she's not contagious, and that we don't infect her with anything, and there was this little radiation exposure issue..."
The speaker in Tali's mask lit as she spoke. "Taylor, you said she was the best medic in town. Where's her sensor suite?"
"She is her own sensor package - we do things a little differently around here, when I get you into the office tomorrow morning I'm sure Brendan will have the whole dog and pony show ready to explain our planet to you. In the meantime, Amy is going to need just the slightest bit of skin contact..."
Amy blinked. Planet?
"If I catch something and die, Taylor, I swear I'm going to haunt you." Tali waved her hand and a nifty computer interface seemingly made of pure light rezzed up in an attractive digital pattern. She tapped at it for almost ten seconds, then waved it away. The left sleeve of her bodysuit hissed and visibly tightened around her arm, then the glove below clicked twice and she pulled it off. "Please do not pierce my skin. Taylor, can you boil some water so I can sanitize after?"
Amy automatically reached forward to take the proffered talon gently in one hand. "Do I have per-"
Tali was unsure of local etiquette, so she waited politely for fifteen seconds before waving her other, still-gloved hand in front of the medic's unblinking eyes. She turned to call after her new friend, who had disappeared into the kitchen. "Taylor? Taylor! I think your friend is broken!"
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