Unknown Heroine (Worm, Altpower!Taylor)

Should Danny get powers? (Events depends on the winning choice)


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  • Poll closed .
Voting is open
Our civic identity is also now a consultant. We need someone who has the right knowledge, skills and personality traits for this role while not possessing inhuman traits. Of the characters available to us now, only Iris is suitable for this role. While her looks stand out, it's not something that can't be achieved with good looks, makeup, and hair dye.
Her main disadvantage is that she is a basic human and is vulnerable to attacks. We should try to fix this later. Enchantment, probably.
 
Was looking into Konosuba class system but I don't see how to make the object that makes the adventure cards. If anybody has a idea for that it would be great.
 
Voting time will end within 3 ~ 4 hours. If you want to change your votes or discuss more about your decision, you can still do it at the duration of this voting time.
 
Really recommend choosing a different cape name, from civilian identity. trying to fix the worlds problems when we zero reputation is way overreaching, at the very least we need to get a lab session with Armmaster.
 
Voting is now closed. Please wait for the update!~~
Scheduled vote count started by Levelgap on Aug 18, 2021 at 7:54 AM, finished with 16 posts and 8 votes.
 
Rebirth 1.11
I decided to think about it later. My Dad is fine. I am sure he is still on the house. He might be depressed because of my death, but I am sure he is at the house.

... I'll look into it. I just need to find the right opportunity for it.

Now about this document, I wrote my Cape name as Iris and then my civilian identity as Iris Lana Armelia, the name that this form seems to have.

After I'm finished, I presented it back to the Deputy Director.

He takes it and look into the documents. He seems to be raising his eyebrow to some of the contents in there though he didn't made any comments and just stood up.

"Well then Iris, it is nice to work with you." He said as he presented his hand to me.

I took it with my hand and shook it in exchange.

It seems like everything else will be done tomorrow. Like making my new ID, bank account, orientation on newbie consultants, and other responsibilities that I have.

After that, it seems like I will be escorted to the apartment that was loaned to me. The one who will escort me is one of the PRT Agents here.

The two heroes lead me to the outside of the headquarters. While we were walking, we're conversing with each other.

"You know, you're pretty amazing when you were negotiating for your position there." Assault told me in amazement.

"Well... I really don't want to be in a combat situation. I think I can't handle it." I said while giving them a wry smile.

"Is that so?" Assault said. "I think your powers might be useful. Maybe you can use it for S&R. It's not like you always need to fight just because you're a hero." Assault told me in a casual tone.

"How can I even do search and rescue?" I asked while feeling confused.

I can only change forms. It's not like one of my forms have powers or something right?

I mean, I already have four forms but it seems like none of them have any powers other than knowledge and some sort of experience. I am not sure about Myne because I didn't get a deep impression of her before I quickly changed to another form, but I think she's also a normal human.

"Anyone can do search and rescue. Like if there is a hostage situation, you can change into one of the criminals there and get within their ranks. Then you can do a surprise attack or something." Assault explained.

".... I only have limited forms. My power is not that flexible that I can freely change my appearance." I said with a deadpan.

"Oh right. Sorry, it slipped my mind!" Assault apologized while scratching the back of his head.

"Iris, we're here." Battery suddenly called out to me.

It seems like we are already at the front door of the PRT. It seems like it's already midnight. So it took me some hours just taking care of anything here huh...

"Anyway, let's get in touch Iris!" Assault said. "See you in the morning!"

"See you later, Iris." Battery also followed with a smile on my way.

"Yes. See you tomorrow!" I said back with a smile before going forward.

It seems like there is a van waiting for me and a guy there. He must be the one who will escort me to the apartment that was loaned to me.

"Hello Iris. I am Officer Hanks Ranger. I will be the one who will escort you in your apartment."

"Thank you." I said while nodding at him.

He gestured for me to get inside and I obliged.

[It's Dangerous!] +1 EXP

After that, I got inside the van, on the passenger seat at the back. Hanks takes the driver's seat. After that, he drives the van to the road.

Now then, I think it is time to think what I should do next.

My Dad is still a concern... but I need to solidify my identity first before I get to my Dad without giving a hint that I am related to him.

I still can't go back to my original form so I think I am now going to live as Iris Lana Armelia. I think I should also ask for an appointment to test my powers again and try to see what I can do.

After that.... what should I do after that?

Currently, the whole city is slowly dying due to the gangs. The Empire, the ABB, and the Merchants are the gangs most well known in the Bay. They are killing this city because of stupid ideologies, pride, or just being the scum of this place.

Because of the gangs, even normal criminals are getting away just because most people's focus are always on the gangs.

It felt like the PRT can't handle this. Though I wonder why they are not calling for any reinforcements from the other cities?

Anyway, because of the constant terror that the three gangs are doing on this city, a lot of people are being affected in a negative way. The most prevalent are human casualties and public disorder.

That is just this city.

Based on what I know, the whole US is being terrorized by the S Class threats. Each S Class threat is a danger near the level of the Endbringers.

Some examples like Nilbog, The Machine Army, and the Slaughterhouse Nine.

They are capable of causing untold amount of damages, both physical and psychological.

Then there are the Endbringers. Giant creatures that wipe out a city every three months.

There is the Behemoth, which causes cities to become uninhabitable. The Leviathan who sinks islands. And the Simurgh, one of the most terrifying of the three that causes any city it invades to be quarantined due to it's massive Master effect.

I don't know if I have anything that can help with those. Maybe with Ringo's knowledge, I can create some sort of tech that can counter the effects of the aftermath?

I know that I can create a filtration machine that can clean radioactive areas. If I change into Ringo and think about this more, maybe I will have more ideas to counter the other problems?

I need to make it cheap. I can't just create something using expensive and rare materials. I need something that can be mass produced.

If I manage to create something that can be mass produced and is helpful to this country, I think it will be worth it.

"... Hm?"

I felt myself getting sleepy. Maybe I am really tired right now.

Maybe I'll take a nap.

[Defenseless] +1 EXP
[Avoiding Death Flags] +10,000 EXP (x2)


"Iris. Wake up!"

"Huh?"

I felt someone shaking me in my shoulder so I opened my eyes for a bit. I saw the guy on the driver's seat shaking me with his hand.

"We're here." He told me.

I quickly recall being tired and sleeping while on the road. It seems like we are here now.

I'm still a bit light headed but I am conscious enough to leave the car without stumbling.

"Thank you for taking me here." I said politely.

He just grunted before driving out, leaving me alone.

I look at the building on my side. They said that it was on 14th Mary St. and it was the red building.

Which means, this is the right place.

The room I am currently assigned was the room 203. Which means I am going to the second floor.

It's just a single flight of stairs.

After getting to the second floor, I look for my room. When I find it, I take the key that was given to me before I left the PRT HQ, then use it to unlock the door.

I took a moment to find the switch to light this up. After the light opens, I look around.

"Hmm... this is a bit small but it is fine for me." I muttered to myself.

After looking around for awhile, I walk to the bed and take my heels off (I just noticed I am wearing heels) and go straight to the bed.

I am really sleepy. I think I'll take my time to sleep and think about my problems tomorrow.

As I decided that in my mind, my eyes are already closing. After that, I fell asleep.

Course of Action
[]Try visiting your home at the Docks
[]Ask PRT for something
-[]Test Ringo's knowledge on a Tinker's Lab
-[]Try and ask for permission so you can heal someone using Keine
-[]Test Myne again
-[]Write-In
[]Buy a new form
-[]Write-In
[]Write-In


[Act 1 Rebirth Finish] +100,000 EXP
[Chapter Grade : A] +500,000 EXP
[Government Is The Best] +10,000 EXP
[Heroes Are Good] +10,000 EXP


(You can ask the QM to reveal 3 Achievements.)
Just ask the QM if you can unlock an achievement by doing certain actions and the QM will update the Achievement Section.
(You can now create Side Stories.)
If you create a Side Story and the QM put it in the Side Story threadmark, you will acquire EXP depending on what happened on the Side Story.
(You can now create Omakes.)
If you create an Omake and the QM put it in the Omake threadmark, you will acquire EXP depending on what happened on the Omake.

Voting time is open until 16 ~ 72 hours.

[Forms]
Iris Lana Armelia (Currently Used)
Kanzaki Keine
Ohoshi Ringo
Myne

EXP : 660,552
 
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Hidden Achievements
Hidden achievements can only be taken after a Chapter is finished. These are achievements that Taylor can't see.

This is the list of hidden rewards that you unlocked :

Complete all the Rebirth Chapters.
Complete all the Unveil Chapters.
A problem occurs that is indirectly caused because of you.
You believe in the Government and think that they can help you.
You see heroes as your allies and is willing to help them.
You and the characters were helping each other.
You discovered something very important or world changing.
The laws and logic of another world was introduced on this world.
No deaths. Always do something that is advantageous to you. Also, not being in a dangerous position. Though you are sure you can do better.
No deaths. You do something right and do something wrong. You think you can do better.
No one created a Sidestory on the duration of the Act.
No one created an Omake on the duration of the Act.
 
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Sakaguchi Hinata can copy abilitys with ursurper. We can buy her. Also i think she is a brute. Just saying . She cost like 50k
 
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Virgo would also be a nice buy for her healing, forcefields, and power nullification. The only problem is that she has white wings and other abilities that can be considered as a master power, so the Simurgh comparisons would be troubling...
 
....600k+ if that's not an invitation on spending, I don't know what was.

I think at the minimum we need a 300k character with combat focus. Also avoid the Dungeon Cores and Angel Characters. Too much complications if we go that route.

Alright after thinking for a bit I think this is for the best.

[X] Plan: War Goddess and Ninja
-[X]Buy a new form
--[x] Shizuku Yaegashi
--[x] Shinobu Sarutobi
-[x] Investigate discreetly your home using Shinobu after throughly checking your new house for bugs. Leave some of the bugs in the house intact while taking note of their location. If there's some in your person then destroy it.


.....I know, I know. She is literally crazy, but hear me out.

Her craziness is why I picked her. We want the PRT and Taylor to treat her personality changes seriously, as in if she were acting cruel and monsterous it was because of her form and that they need to treat each of them accordingly and not just shrug it off saying 'She could handle it'.

That's why I want our first combat form to be mentally unhinged. Whoever our unfortunate victim is we can get away scott free mauling them saying that we didn't expect the changes to be so drastic, her ability being a super undying melee fighter also helps Taylor acclimating to fighting without being in danger if Lung were to unfortunately be the starter boss again.
 
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[x] Plan investigation
[x]Try visiting your home at the Docks,
-[x] using shinobu form for stealth
[x]Buy a new form

-[x] Shinobu Sarutobi
-[x] Aoi Ichij

Lets get danny investigation done, with Shinobu who is a stealth expert it will be east. Aoi is a good combat powerhouse, so lets save until we can get Shaltear bloodfallen we are almost their
 
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[X]Buy a new form
-[x] Polux
-[X] Dina


both of them is super strong
and in case of polux she can resurrect other

While dina have time manipulation sealing that strong enough to seal ruphas for 200 years and creation skill that can create skill
 
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[x]Try visiting your home at the Docks,
-[x] using shinobu form for stealth
[x]Buy a new form

-[x] Shinobu Sarutobi
-[x] Aoi Ichij

Lets get danny investigation done, with Shinobu who is a stealth expert it will be east. Aoi is a good combat powerhouse, so lets save until we can get Shaltear bloodfallen we are almost their
Looking at Shinobu, yeah she looks like a good cheap one. Though her being able to change personality worries me. Don't know whether that's going to be good or bad for Taylor.

Let's try to do plan voting though. Last time we do this only the action vote got through while the form buying we need to revote on in the next chapter.

[X]Buy a new form
-[x] Polux
-[X] Dina


both of them is super strong
and in case of polux she can resurrect other

While dina have time manipulation sealing that strong enough to seal ruphas for 200 years and creation skill that can create skill
Let's....not add ressurecting, or something complicated this early in the Quest. I think based on the nanomachines magic incident in the previous story we can tell that the QM isn't afraid to escalate accordingly to what we choose. Let's just pick a simple brute right now.
 
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Looking at Shinobu, yeah she looks like a good cheap one. Though her being able to change personality worries me. Don't know whether that's going to be good or bad for Taylor.

Let's try to do plan voting though. Last time we do this only the action vote got through while the form buying we need to revote on in the next chapter.
Made it a plan, and shinobu is a good actor basically.
 
[X]Try visiting your home at the Docks,
-[X]Using Shinobu form for stealth
[X]Buy a new form
-[X]Shinobu Sarutobi
-[X]Aoi Ichij


I think we should try saving up for one of the more expensive characters.

but I am sure he is on the house.
but I am sure he is at the house.

After I'm finish, I presented it back to the Deputy Director.
After I'm finished, I presented it back to the Deputy Director.

I took it with my hand and shakes it in exchange.
I took it with my hand and shook it in exchange.

It seems like anything else will be done tomorrow.
It seems like everything else will be done tomorrow.

The two heroes leads me to the outside of the headquarters. While we were walking, we're conversing to each other.
The two heroes lead me to the outside of the headquarters. While we were walking, we're conversing with each other.

"You know, your pretty amazing when your negotiating for your position there." Assault told me in amazement.
"You know, you're pretty amazing when you were negotiating for your position there." Assault told me in amazement.

Maybe you can use it for S&R. It's not like you always need to fight just because your a hero."
Maybe you can use it for S&R. It's not like you always need to fight just because you're a hero."

I am not sure about Myne because I didn't get a deep impression of her before I quickly change to another form, but I think she's also a normal human.
I am not sure about Myne because I didn't get a deep impression of her before I quickly changed to another form, but I think she's also a normal human.

"Oh right. Sorry, it slips my mind!"
"Oh right. Sorry, it slipped my mind!"

Based on what I know, the whole US are being terrorized by the S Class Threats. Each S Class Threats are dangers near the level of the Endbringers.
Based on what I know, the whole US is being terrorized by S-Class threats. Each S-Class threat is a danger near the level of the Endbringers.
Interesting thing, a hundred years ago, "the US are" would be correct, because the United States used to be plural. It's now singular though, so "the US is" is the correct version.

Giant creatures that wipes out a city every three months.
Giant creatures that wipe out a city every three months.

There is the Behemoth, which causes cities to become inhabitable.
There is the Behemoth, which causes cities to become uninhabitable.
Inhabitable means it's good to live in. Adding the prefix un makes it to opposite, so uninhabitable means it is not a survivable area.

"Hmm... this is a bit small but it was fine for me." I muttered to myself.
"Hmm... this is a bit small but it is fine for me." I mutter to myself.

(I just noticed I am wearing hills)
(I just noticed that I am wearing heels)

The most common mistake I saw was mixing up you're and your. You're is a combination of the words 'you' and 'are'. So when deciding which one to use read out the sentence, once using you are, and the next using your. Such as "Those are you are shoes" vs "Those are your shoes" in this example your is the correct version, because you are makes no sense. "You are old" vs "Your old" in this example you are makes sense, so the correct word would be you're, not your. Please tell me if my explanation makes sense, if not I'll try to reword it.
 
Rebirth 1.b - ???
'I wonder why I am here?'

It is what Iris is thinking as she look at the giant screen in front of them as she sits on a comfortable sofa.

She is Iris Lana Armelia. First daughter of the Louis Dan Armelia and Mellice Reese Armelia. She is the acting feudal lord of the Duke of Armelia's territory, and is also the founder Azura Conglomerate.

She is also a former Japanese office lady in her past life. After she died due to a truck running over her, she opened her eyes and finds out that she has become Iris.

It was weird. Because she knows Iris as the villainess of her favorite Otome Game. Also, she wakes up during the ending of her Otome Game.

It's the ending where her original fiance, the Second Prince, became the protagonist's lover.

It's also the ending where Iris was condemned on the whole class and after that, she was exiled from the kingdom.

Or it was supposed to happen but she changes it because her father surprisingly hopes to separate her from the Second Prince. She gratefully accepted her role as the representative of her father to his territory.

Anyway, she recalls having slept on her house in the capital after attending the party on the Royal Palace.

When she opened her eyes, she was in this expansive black space with a giant screen, a lot of comfortable looking sofas, and a shelf full of books besides those sofa.

She was surprised when a table suddenly appeared when she took a seat. It became a feeling of amazement after food suddenly appeared on the table.

It seems like depending on what she wants to eat, those food will appear on the table.

She looks besides her and see the petite girl with a long deep blue hair tied in a bun behind her, and expressive golden colored eyes.

She have introduced herself awhile ago as Myne. Currently, she is happily eating some sweets. She can hear her muttering "I miss eating this" or "This one's delicious too!~"

Then on the other sofa besides her, there are two girls sitting in there. One is a small girl wearing an engineer-looking clothes, and the other is a blonde girl wearing a white lab coat.

The two have introduced themselves awhile ago as Ohoshi Ringo and Kanzaki Keine.

Those names are clearly Japanese.

The four of them seems to be curious about why they are here and how they find themselves here.

They are also pretty curious about the person that they are watching.

Her name seems to be Taylor Anne Hebert. Someone living in a certain coastal city in US called Brockton Bay. Though they aren't familiar with that city.

Iris is sure there is no such city existing in her former life.

Anyway, it seems like Taylor died on some sort of accident. It might be a traffic accident based on what she recalls.

The four of them can hear what she thought and see whatever she is thinking. They can see Taylor's perspective. Even her emotions are being clearly conveyed on them through this giant screen in this expansive black space.

As for the books on the shelves besides their sofa, it seems like those contain basic information about Earth Bet and the whole history of Taylor Hebert.

Myne is reading the books while eating her sweets. As for the other three, they only read some of the books and take only the important things they want to know before focusing on what Taylor is currently doing.

They saw Taylor using their own forms. It also seems like she can buy the other forms.

When she bought Ringo and Keine, the two girls just appeared on their side abruptly. This meant that whenever she buys someone, the person she bought will appear in this expansive black space.

It also seems like they are not really stuck her.

Awhile ago, Myne fell asleep after being satisfied on the sweets. She only slept for a minute before waking up once again.

It seems like when she slept here, she wakes up in her own world, or so she claims.

It seems like they can get in this place anytime they sleep in their own world. Though if they sleep here, they will wake up in their world.

Which means this place can be considered as their own dream.

Iris is not that sure because she hadn't tested it yet. If she really manage to wake up after sleeping in this weird space, her deductions will be proven true.

While she was thinking like that, it seems like Taylor was just done negotiating her position on the PRT.

The four of them turned their focus on what is happening again.

It seems like Taylor decided to use Iris as her civilian identity. Though they are confused why she wants to use Iris as her alias.

"... Isn't that counterproductive for hiding her identity?" That's what Myne honestly stated.

"She thought it is a smart plan. She thinks no one will think she is the superhero known as Iris if she uses the name as her civilian identity." Iris said, recalling some of Taylor's thoughts that they heard. "Iris seems to be one of the common names here. Though it is still a stupid move." She claimed with a disappointed tone.

They saw Taylor talking to the two superheroes. Though after arriving to the entrance, they said their farewells before Taylor got to the van that was prepared for her.

It seems like Taylor is a bit too preoccupied on her thoughts because she didn't see the pop up that essentially screamed at her to leave the van quickly.

"What's going to happen?" Myne asked in a worry.

Iris narrowed her eyes as she waits for something to happen.

The two high school prodigies seems to have two different reactions. Ringo is afraid what will happen to Taylor while Keine is looking carefully what the guy will do.

When they saw Taylor falling asleep, they are alarmed. They can still see the Taylor's surroundings even though her eyes are closed.

It seems like they can change into a third person view whenever they want. The large cinema-like screen seems to discern whatever they want so it changes POV depending on their desires.

Though it is still focused on Taylor.

Anyway, when Taylor fell unconscious, a pop up suddenly appeared on Iris' vision.

Character Override is possible!

Do you want to take control of the body?
(Warning : Changing forms is not available in the duration of the override)

(Yes/No)

Iris looks at the other three and saw that they are not reacting much. It seems like they weren't notified other than her.

'Maybe because she is using my body now?' Iris deduced. 'I'll wait and see for now.' She thought before putting her focus on the guy in the driver's seat.

The guy at the driver's seat suddenly speaks to no one while he was still driving.

"Target has been incapacitated. What's my next order, sir." He said to no one while taking some turns on the road.

They can't hear what's being said on the other side. They can only hear some audible radio noises on the driver's side.

"...It's a wireless communication earpiece!" Ringo exclaimed. "It seems like... it was connected through somewhere..., I don't know... where it was connected..." Ringo said while feeling down.

"You don't have to be depressed. We can't even interact with her right now." Keine reassured her friend.

Hanks drives on the road and take more turns once again. He seems to be going on in circle on the Downtown. All of them recognized this fact.

After awhile, it seems like the one he was calling from has something to say again. They can't still hear other than the audible radio noises.

"Affirmative, sir." The driver said to the other side.

After that, he drives to a place that seems to match what the Deputy Director describes to Taylor about her new home.

They saw him waking her up. Taylor seems to be oblivious of what is happening as she thanks the driver for escorting her to this place.

When Taylor wakes up, the prompt that appeared on Iris' vision had suddenly vanished.

It seems like whenever Taylor is unconscious, the character that she is currently using can take over the control of her body. Or it is what Iris deduced.

"... I wonder... how we can help her..." Ringo said with a soft tone.

It seems like she is worried about Taylor's health.

Well, it might because she reads some of her history, like her being bullied by her supposed to be childhood friend.

"Actually... I might have an idea." Iris said before explaining about the prompt awhile ago.

After she was done explaining, Keine made a thinking gesture before she nodded to herself.

"Then, why don't we test your theory." She said, then she looks at the screen. "Look, she seems to be sleeping once again. Why don't you try and takeover?"

"Of course." Iris replied with a nod before looking at the prompt that appeared on her vision when Taylor sleeps once again.

She picks the Yes option and suddenly, she was lying on the bed face first.

She stood up and saw that she was inside the room where Taylor is currently located.

"... This proves my theory then." She said before looking at the ceiling. "Can you hear me, Kanzaki-san, Ohoshi-san, Myne-san."

She still didn't forget her politeness as a Japanese person. Adding those honorifics must be done, mostly because two of her companions on that dark space are Japanese.

She didn't hear anyone replying back to her, but she thinks they can hear her and see her just fine.

"Well... take note, I can't currently hear you." She said to them on the other side.

Of course she can't hear their reply but she thinks they can understand.

"Well then. First, I need to warn Taylor about that guy. That PRT Organization seems to be lacking in their security." Iris muttered to herself in disdain.

She looks for a pen and paper to write on.

'I hope she understands and didn't think of this as a prank...' Iris thought to herself.
 
...I didn't think Coil would try to act so soon she didn t show anything particular and is technically under the protection of the PRT

And is it still possible to change cape names? If yes I vote for Kaleidoscope(pretty obvious why)
Also we are too weak right now so:

-[X]Buy Form:
-- Hinata Sakaguchi
-- Sicily
--Shizue Izawa
--Shinobu Sarutobi
-[x] Investigate discreetly your home using Shinobu after thoroughly checking your new house and your person for bugs. Use Ringo to try and track where they where sending information to. Next day use Ringo to go thou the PRT computer systems for signs of spies
Sicily for the enchantments, Hinata for the strength and Shizu to hopefully convince Hinata to help in character override etc

Also I am pretty sure the PRT put cameras and micros(probably but Coil would definitely put them) that Coil is currently using so buying Hinata is really urgent or at least someone tanky enough
 
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Yeahh.....I am more convinced of my plan now. Shinobu for getting rid of the bugs and Adenela for nasty surprise. Edited my plan a bit adjusting for this new information.
 
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but I am sure he is at the house.


After I'm finished, I presented it back to the Deputy Director.


I took it with my hand and shook it in exchange.


It seems like everything else will be done tomorrow.


The two heroes lead me to the outside of the headquarters. While we were walking, we're conversing with each other.


"You know, you're pretty amazing when you were negotiating for your position there." Assault told me in amazement.


Maybe you can use it for S&R. It's not like you always need to fight just because you're a hero."


I am not sure about Myne because I didn't get a deep impression of her before I quickly changed to another form, but I think she's also a normal human.


"Oh right. Sorry, it slipped my mind!"


Based on what I know, the whole US is being terrorized by S-Class threats. Each S-Class threat is a danger near the level of the Endbringers.
Interesting thing, a hundred years ago, "the US are" would be correct, because the United States used to be plural. It's now singular though, so "the US is" is the correct version.


Giant creatures that wipe out a city every three months.


There is the Behemoth, which causes cities to become uninhabitable.
Inhabitable means it's good to live in. Adding the prefix un makes it to opposite, so uninhabitable means it is not a survivable area.


"Hmm... this is a bit small but it is fine for me." I mutter to myself.


(I just noticed that I am wearing heels)

The most common mistake I saw was mixing up you're and your. You're is a combination of the words 'you' and 'are'. So when deciding which one to use read out the sentence, once using you are, and the next using your. Such as "Those are you are shoes" vs "Those are your shoes" in this example your is the correct version, because you are makes no sense. "You are old" vs "Your old" in this example you are makes sense, so the correct word would be you're, not your. Please tell me if my explanation makes sense, if not I'll try to reword it.

Thank you for the corrections once again.

Some of my mistakes there are because of the auto correct (like what the hell, I swear I type heels there!)

But the your and you're difference is something I understand. Though, I still get it wrong most of the time because I always think how they sound like and decides that maybe it is, without checking once again. I read both words in the same accent so that's why I always forget about it most of the time....

By the way, there are two more interludes that are coming!
 
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Yeahh.....I am more convinced of my plan now. Shinobu for getting rid of the bugs and Adenela for nasty surprise. Edited my plan a bit adjusting for this new information.
Adenela bring her entire magic system with her, and makes it available to everybody. That would only make the villains much more powerful. It is also a massive waste of points Darkness or Aoi are much more points effective for combat until we can afford Bloodfallen who is basically the best combat form possible sub millions.
 
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Adenela bring her enitre magic system with her, and makes it avaliable to everybody. That would only make the villains much more powerful. It is also a massive waste of points Darkness or Aoi are much more points effective for combat
What? Her magic is system based? Does her system using some kind of screen? Does the screen only appears to only few select individuals? What are the explanations of those screen existance like are they created by semi omnipresent nanobots obeying their command or are they just a way to identifying the characters strenght while also assisting their growth?

If it's the first then their entire system would be brought here, yes, because the caster are only inputting the commands while the system itself does the heavy lifting, but if it's the later then those system wouldn't come here as they are just a method to view and assist the naturally existing magic in the body.
 
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