Lancet Fluke- Ten
Alright! So, I know it's been a while, and I'm sorry for that- this chapter just really fought me while I was writing it. I'm not really satisfied with how it ends, but I'd rather just publish it and let myself move on than continue to stew over it indefinitely. As for the content warnings, as usual we have a lot of them: body horror, insects, gore?, self-hatred, very brief allusion to sexual assault, bullying, and cannibalism.
Despite all the terror, depression, and absolute misery the last few months had been somehow it's now- when things are going surprisingly not disastrously- that Taylor feels like she's the most stressed she's ever been.
When they- when she triggered, there hadn't been enough time for her to dread anything- it was all a nightmare fever of fear and humiliation and horror. Things had progressed so rapidly from juvenile prank to- to what happened, that she had barely even been able to process it at the time.
The following days and months were soaked with anxiety and anger at the world around her, disgust and despair over her own powers, and a constant undertone of both depression and an agonizing sort of tenseness that refused to let up.
It had been fucking awful- waking up every day already feeling so violated that she assumed the lumps and movement under her skin was part of some sort of pathetic phycological break. Then realizing slowly but surely that- no- she really did have something inside her, crawling and itching and biting.
Going to school had been its own sort of torture as well- the worst day of her life had been public, which meant she was a spectacle- something to be amusingly commented on like the weather or the state of the winning football team.
Having to sit in the same classes with the people who made her life living hell- having to sit and say nothing, and do nothing, and be nothing as they giggled about how shitty she looked covered up in all her layers- she meant it sincerely when she said that she'd rather just have them beat the shit out of her for eight hours instead.
But even against all of that- somehow, this was more terrifying.
Maybe it was because the stakes were higher- she'd fucking killed people now- children- whatever the law, or the PRT or hell, even Sophia, decided to do to her would be more than justified. She was probably heading towards a steel bunker underground, drugged up to her gills with the Hive somehow incapacitated at best. And as much as she deserved it- it was hard not to dread it as well. Her subconscious full of all of the horrible things that they could do to her without anyone even raising an eyebrow.
Would she be kept alive and docile, slowly going crazy within the confines of her own mind as she withered away in some cell? Would they take her apart- cold sharp metal unveiling a mass of writhing bodies inside her- never able to die but never free of pain? Would they try to kill her- and if they did- which was the kindest option- what would happen to her dad? Would he ever know what happened to her? Would they let him believe she was just another victim of some unknown bug-master? Would they tell him, whisper to him and him only that his daughter- the girl he'd raised and loved and stilled cared about even when he couldn't be there- that she'd snapped and gone crazy and killed everyone- killed what he still thought was her best friend-
Taylor suppressed a wince as an Excavating Terminal pushed aside something in her stomach on it's way- an organ of some kind, either her original set or a manufactured thing. It's sharp legs carefully avoided puncturing anything important, but it was still painful, and uncomfortable in a way she couldn't quite describe- like having an itch on the back of your mouth that you couldn't scratch or soothe no mater how many times you cleared your throat.
Or maybe she was tense because as much as the situation with the Hive had 'improved' (in terms of communication) she still wasn't really 'in control' of them. Sure, the ones localized in her body seemed to be almost freakishly receptive to her orders when necessary- but that was the thing, it was only when necessary. They would listen smoothly and without complaint when the situation called for it- but as soon as they- or rather, the Hive- disagreed- then all bets were off.
She couldn't just tell them to fuck off for example- the thought didn't really even seem to translate. Just the same way that she'd thought she had a good handle of her healing Terminal until suddenly it leaped into Victoria's mouth.
She'd had like, three nervous break-down-panic-attack-things since she left the safety of the nest, she was barely fucking keeping it together! And now that she was near people it was going to be a million times worse!
And that was really the damning part of it. The reason why her probably non-human heart felt like it was going to explode even though she was just walking- the reason why her fingers trembled and shook enough she had to keep them in her pocket and clench her jaw shut to keep from clattering.
People. She was surrounded by humans and she felt like she was going to be physically sick on the busted up sidewalk in front of them.
She felt their eyes on her constantly- judging and prying and watching her every twitch carefully. No doubt they were disgusted by what they saw- no doubt they had to stain themselves to keep their faces neutral and their noses unwrinkled. They knew she was a threat; knew she was dangerous- that a part of her- the Hive- her- had torn apart her classmates like their skin was paper.
They had to be thinking of ways to put her down even now- and worse, she'd fucking told them about herself.
Stupid. So fucking stupid. It had felt almost painfully good in the moment- like pouring hydrogen peroxide on a wound infected and watching it fizzle. It had been…freeing almost, to actually tell someone- anyone- about at least some of the things that had happened to her.
But it had only been freeing because she hadn't expected it to last. It had been one last attempt to explain events from her side before everything inevitably fell apart. She had expected them to not care. Or at the very most, feel slightly conflicted about putting her down. It had been a selfish urge. She hadn't thought they'd listen.
But now they knew! They knew just how pathetic she was- just how much she had screwed everything up just because she couldn't handle a few mean words. They seemed legitimately surprised and angry at the…way things had turned out around her trigger event- which- which had been shockingly nice- but any sympathy they might've had was going to swirl down the drain once they got acquainted with the reality of the situation.
She desperately wished she could rip the knowledge from their heads- that she was weak- that she was all vulnerable underside with no hard shell, that horrible things happened to her and she did nothing to make anything better.
And that wasn't even getting into Tattletale- Taylor genuinely didn't want to even try imaging what she probably knew about her life now. If she was as good as she said she was then- then she no doubt knew all the things she had left untouched in her summary- all the shit Taylor wanted most locked away and buried and forgotten about.
She tried to remember that the villain had seemed horrified, almost sick on her account- but no matter what she saw, or what she knew logically, she couldn't help but wait- tense and uncomfortable for the laughter to start.
"-oing? Taylor?" Taylor flinched to the tune of thousands of muffled legs twitching, snapping her head to the side so harshly her neck protested.
Victoria blinked, seemingly startled by the response, before half-heartedly raising her hands in innocence.
"…Hi. Um. I was just asking if you were doing okay? You look a bit- well, um, your probably still in pain, right?" She sounded awkward enough that Taylor felt her cheeks heat up in sympathy- god, how the hell did she manage to get inside her own head with a literal sentry-bug flying directly over her head?
Taylor picked up her pace a little so that Victoria wouldn't have to slow down for her while she struggled with a response.
How the hell was she supposed to reply to question like that? Of course she was in pain, she was the human equivalent of a clown car over stuffed with flesh eating bugs- she doubted that she ever went more than a couple seconds without some sort of irritant or pinch scraping at her skin or squeezing her guts. But saying that would be oversharing- and weird, and she'd already whined enough before- and besides, what right did she have to complain after everything she'd done? Why would Victoria even ask a question like that?
"It's manageable. I… it's been worse, and I'm sort of used to it by now." All true enough. Taylor absently encouraged a terminal away from her lips by biting the inside of her cheek where it was crawling. It made a truly unpleasant sound, and her teeth itched at the sensation of it writhing underneath them. Blood filled her mouth- it must have scratched though the flesh on the inside of her cheek in its panic.
Victoria was looking at her with her eyebrows lowered in concern, eyes an unfairly deep color of blue. When Taylor swallowed her throat tasted like blood.
"Really. It's fine. I'm more concerned about what-" Taylor stopped herself mid sentence, frustration rising up like a tide at her own stupidity. She'd been about to say 'I'm more concerned about what they're going to do to me' like some sort of brain-dead idiot.
She was being way too trusting of Victoria- as genuinely kind as she seemed, she was still a hero- still pretty and rich and popular- when it came down to it, she was never going to side with ugly, awkward, stupid little Taylor. She didn't need to give any more vulnerabilities away; Victoria already knew too much about her as it was.
Victoria hovered a little, eyes flicking briefly upwards to scan their surroundings before resting back on Taylor again. Taylor thought maybe the flying thing was an automatic thing the blonde did when she was stressed or worried- something she did without thinking. She went back to looking at her shoes kick up gravel as she walked.
"What? What where you going to-" Victoria was interrupted mid-sentence as Regent casually slid up to them, his scepter twirling idly in his hands.
Taylor had spotted him apparently deliberating on approaching them previously, and was prepared enough to keep walking steadily when he got within punching distance. A part of her was glad he had decided to barge in, because she honestly didn't want to continue the previous thread of conversation with Victoria- but it was a small part of her.
Mostly she just felt very, very, intensely aware that he was right beside her. If she stretched out her arm she'd be able to easily touch his arm, and vice versa.
Her shoulders stiffened impossibly tighter, and she tucked her arms into her side, hunching slightly so that her hair would hide her face and she made a smaller target. Not much smaller- considering her height, but a bit.
There was a curious sensation rolling through her insides- a slow a deliberate migration of some of her tougher terminals over to her right side. She imagined that a ship at sea might be familiar with the sensation- it's crew and supplies rocking precariously to one side by the force of a powerful ocean wave. The feeling was nausea inducing, mildly painful, and her right arm, side, face, and leg got ever so slightly heavier.
She wasn't even all that sure as to the effectiveness of this maneuver either- surely anything that was ripping through her skin and upper layers of fat was powerful enough to burst through the makeshift wall of carapaces?
And even with all that going on under the surface she was still a hundred percent focused on Regent. She asked one the Sensor Terminal to keep one of its 'eyes' fully focused on him alone, paying particular attention to his hands. Thankfully, it did so without complaint or question which was a relief- fighting against the Hive on top of whatever the hell her body was doing right now would have been anxiety inducing to say the least.
"Soo what are we talking about over here?" He drawled his bored tone at ends with the tension her terminal could see in his legs and back. Was he getting ready to run if things went bad? That was the most sensible thing any of these people had done today.
Victoria- who had just started walking with her feet to the ground and everything- started floating again, jaw clenching. She seemed fairly wary of Regent as well, though undoubtably for different reasons. With her level of strength Taylor doubted Victoria had to worry about being touched when she didn't want to be.
Taylor expected Victoria to answer him- she seemed like a very 'take charge' sort of person- but surprisingly she left replying up to Taylor, simply folding her arms across her chest.
Great.
"Nothing. Victoria was just asking how I'm doing, and I'm doing fine." She said tersely, trying not to snap. She had been even tempted to just end her sentence after 'nothing' but that would have made her seem suspicious. Or. Well, more suspicious.
Taylor glanced up at him. She couldn't see the upper half of Regents face- his mask covered that much pretty solidly, and what little she could see of his eyes was shaded and hidden. Undoubtedly she could get a better glimpse through the sensors vision- hell, she could probably make out the exact pigment of his eyelashes with the Sensor Terminal- after all, even from where it was hovering it could easily distinguish Victoria's pores or the dust on Clockblockers shoulders. Unfortunately, he was tilting his head in a direction which made that impossible.
Still, she got the impression from what little she could see that he was raising his eyebrows.
"You're doing fine? You've got mutant bugs with a taste for highschoolers crawling around in you, you basically just wiped a school off the map, and you're probably going to the big-bad-Birdcage for the rest of your life, and you're doing fine?" Regent let out a condescending little laugh.
Taylor subconsciously took a few steps closer to Victoria, before realizing what she was doing and straightening out again. Her fingers were starting to hurt from how harshly she was clenching her hands.
She tried to ignore the mocking 'taste for highschoolers' that was looping mercilessly around in her head, hiding her expression behind her hair and trying not to be sick. She wished so desperately that she didn't have any memories from the brief lapse when she ceased to be 'Taylor' and melded with the Hive- wished that it was merely an ominous hole in her memory, torn from her mind because it was simply too alien to comprehend. But it hadn't been alien at all- not all of it at least. Hunger, and eating and tearing wet meat with starving teeth- these things were natural to her as well- humans were omnivores after all.
The truth was that people tasted a lot like pork- like food. Except for raw and grisly and bloody and warm- except for the sharp crack of bone and the wet yellow fat peeking out from-
"Cut it out Regent. There's no reason to say it like that." Victoria snapped, her aggressive tone thankfully taking Taylor from her darkening thoughts.
Victoria was now a good head or two above them both, somehow turned towards Regent while still maintaining a course straight ahead. It didn't seem like a very wise maneuver- especially since the streets were full of seemingly hastily parked cars and debris. Taylor made a mental note to make sure the hero didn't float into anything while she was preoccupied.
Preoccupied defending Taylor which was extremely weird. It was probably just because she was aware of how little mental stability Taylor had, but it still left her feeling off-balance and flustered.
Regent put his hands up sarcastically and subtly moved his head in a way she assumed meant he was rolling his eyes.
"Oh come on- it's not like she doesn't already know. You went to Winslow- that's the shitty school that makes every other public school in America look like paradise right?" Taylor jolted slightly, surprised he'd gone back to talking to her directly. She was pretty sure Winslow wasn't actually that bad but-
She nodded hesitantly, uncertain where he could possibly be going with this.
"Right, so you're probably poor- and let me guess, everyone's bullying you, so no friends either?"- What the fuck? Was he trying to pick a fight with her? Was he that stupid?- "You only mentioned your dad once earlier- so only one parent, and your power is bugs. Big, murderous- and if I'm reading this right- semi-intelligent- bugs, that you suck at controlling and also happen to live inside you. Now, if we take a look at someone like Canary- hot, talented, super popular- who still ended up getting Birdcaged, and then we look back at you-" Victoria cut him off with a aggressive slicing motion.
"What is your problem?!" She practically snarled, and Taylor had to stop herself from startling at the volume of it- she'd gotten too close to Victoria again.
Before Regent could reply Vista called back- "Is everything alright back there?"- from in front of them, mouth twisted into a harsh frown. She'd probably heard Victoria and had assumed correctly that, no, everything was not 'aright'.
Bizarrely, Taylor was reminded of her mom dryly interrupting her and Emma's arguments on long road trips. Her heart ached a little at the thought of her mother, and then again but much harsher when she remembered that Emma was dead now too.
Regent smiled winningly.
"Oh absolutely, completely and totally fine." He claimed, stressing the last word mockingly. Taylor grit her jaw.
Tattletale, who had been talking quietly with Bitch behind them, quickly jogged up a few paces to catch up- though thankfully she approached from behind Regent and not Taylor.
She grabbed the renaissance themed villain on the shoulder, her grip punishingly tight if his pained grimace said anything.
"Oh well that's great! I'm glad you're trying to be a bare-minimum amount of decent to the two women in our little group most likely to squish you like a shitty stress ball!" Tattletale cheerfully said, her smile baring a few too many teeth to be friendly.
Regent winced.
"I thought that was Bitch?" He half-joked, slowly and awkwardly allowing himself to be dragged backwards by his teammate. Not that Taylor really thought he had much of a choice.
"Nope! After them it's me actually!" Tattletale threatened manically, her voice fading as she started whispering furiously at Regent.
Okay then. Taylor shared an uncertain look with Victoria, who seemed like she couldn't decide whether she was still angry at Regent, amused at Tattletales antics, or uncomfortable with their last conversation.
For once Taylor understood pretty much exactly how she was feeling.
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