The problem with "The War-Torn Kingdom" is that it makes this quest seem like it's going to be bleak, dark and angsty, all about the horrors of war. Also, anyone looking at the title might expect it to be about the kingdom, not about the people - they might expect it to be in the style of Crusader Kings 2, a game of grand battles and political decisions affecting entire countries - whereas in actual fact this is a deeply personal story about a little girl growing up and finding her own place in a peculiar fantasy world.
Yeah, it's a sort-of sequel/prequel/remake of A Hedge Maze Is You, which was occasionally very bleak, dark and angsty, but I want this new quest to be much lighter, softer and more fun, and I think the title should reflect that. Also, "A Hedge Maze Is You" stood out because of its unusual title; "The War-Torn Kingdom" doesn't have that.
I want the new title to be fairly light-hearted and reflect the fact that this is Elys' story. The word "Princess" should probably be in it somewhere.
Uh… I was thinking of renaming it "The Tinpot Princess and Her Many Travels", for these reasons:
1. It sounds a bit silly and light-hearted, which is what I want.
2. According to my Collins English Dictionary, "tinpot" means "inferior, cheap, or worthless" or "paltry; unimportant." Well, I'm British and I've most often heard the word used to pour scorn on foreign countries that are perceived to be small and unimportant, usually dictatorships. Ismar is a tiny, unimportant country and no one outside it is likely to take Elys' title seriously, so I think it's appropriate.
3. It's an oblique reference to the Welsh legend of Culhwch and Olwen (which is connected to Arthurian legend); the version I read was translated into English as "The Pig-Sty Prince and the Many Travels", presumably because English people can't pronounce "Culhwch" (I'm reliably informed that it's pronounced "Coolk", like "cool" but with a hard "k" on the end). Arthurian legend was one of the major inspirations for the Kingdom of Quellonia in this story.
4. The "Many Travels" hints at the adventures Elys will have when she's grown-up, I hope.
What do you think?
Does anyone have any objection to my renaming this quest, "The Tinpot Princess and Her Many Travels"?
I decided to go ahead with changing the title of this quest. I hope no one minds.
I'm going to be away for at least a day or two. I've rushed to get this latest update finished before I have to set off for my friend's bachelor party. If there's anything wrong with it, I'll edit it when I get back. Here it is:
*
Children Should Be Seen but Not Heard
The next day, you tried to stay out of the way while the grown-ups were busy; they made sure you were properly fed and watered, but they were too preoccupied to do more than wish you a perfunctory "Good day!" whenever they noticed you were in the room with them.
Your mother spent much of her time with Bellona and Artaxas, sketching intricate patterns you knew had something to do with magic. In the dining room, where maps and nautical charts had been spread across the table, your father conspired with Captain Flawse, Hrolmar, and Brus Warrence. You overheard some interesting conversations, but at the time you didn't understand their significance; you were unaware of the context.
'How are we going to find the ship we want?' asked Flawse. 'Dozens of ships go in and out of Aspitolm's harbour every day. Most of them are crewed by people who've lived fairly blameless lives; they've got cargo they want to sell and there are things they want to buy, and Aspitolm is a fabulously rich city… Yeah, they turn a blind eye to the horrors of slavery wherever they see them, but so do most other people; they tell themselves "it's terrible, but there's nothing I can do about it" or "it's nothing to do with me." I mean… I'm not trying to defend them, but… I'm assuming we don't want to attack any merchantmen who aren't slavers, right?'
'All right,' said your father. 'How can we identify a slave ship that has no slaves on-board? I'm open to suggestions.'
Hrolmar wrinkled his nose. 'By the stink. A ship that's been used to carry slaves can never really get rid of the stench, no matter how they try to they wash it down afterwards. That smell… it has something in common with an open sewer, something in common with an army camp in which there's been an outbreak of plague, but mostly it's like a battlefield where the corpses have been left to rot. If the wind's right, I can identify a slave ship from miles away. There's nothing else like it.'
'Follow the sharks,' said Flawse with a harsh laugh. 'Carrion eaters, they follow the slave ships in the hopes of a free meal or two. They know which ships have been good to them in the past, so I hear. If we see sharks following in the wake of a ship that isn't carrying any slaves right now, it's probably one of the ones we seek.'
'Or we could ask Belle to send one of her spirits to scout for us,' suggested Brus.
'Possibly, but there's a risk that it might be seen and traced back to us,' said your father. 'Still, it seems we have a few options.'
Later, over a light lunch of oatcakes, scrambled eggs and poached fish, Captain Flawse asked, 'How are we going to get in touch with King Marc? We need to let him know we're going privateering on his behalf, otherwise he's not going to be willing to pay us.'
'I could enlist one of my spirit allies as a messenger,' Bellona offered.
Brus laughed uproariously. 'Spirits! Is there any problem they can't solve? Hah!'
'Or… I could build a simulacrum, animate it and give it wings, and–'
'I'm not sure we have enough time,' said your father. 'A spirit might be better. Thank you.'
'How did we manage before we met you, dear?' said your mother to Bellona, putting an arm around her shoulders and reeling her in for a hug.
'I've heard some of the stories of what you did before you met me,' said Bellona. She was like a statue, cold and still, allowing Yslena to hug her but not really joining in. 'It sounds like you got horribly lost, most of the time.'
You got up and ran over to them, begging to be allowed to join in: 'Let me in, big sis! Group hug!'
That broke the tension nicely. Bellona laughed, picked you up, and embraced you while Yslena was embracing her; the three of you were like a set of nesting dolls.
After lunch, your mother wanted to talk to you. 'I'd originally planned to go with your father on this trip. Brus was meant to watch and look after you while we were gone,' she said. 'However, I've been thinking… my skills aren't going to be much use aboard a ship. Brus really wants to go and I'm inclined to let him; I'd rather stay here with you. I haven't discussed it with your father yet, but… well…' She sighed. It was clear that something was niggling at her. 'Elys, I know Mishrak visited you last night. Just for my peace of mind, tell me exactly what happened. Please.'
What was Elys' reply to this question?
[] "He said he was keeping an eye on me because… uh... after he helped save my life, he feels responsible for me."
[] "We played a game with my dolls. I was the wizard-princess Irina, he was the dragon emperor Tatse Gozira."
[] "You were busy, so he told me a bedtime story."
[] "He promised to teach me illusion magic, if you say yes. Please say yes!"
[] "We're going to make a trade. I'll give him a bag of seashells; he's going to get me a whistle!"
[] Say something else (write in).
Who looked after Elys while the rest of the group was away on their adventure?
[] Brus
[] Yslena
[] Someone else (write in*)
*Note: I may veto any suggestions I think are unsuitable.
