Sune's Solution (D&D/MGE)

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Erien said:
So, wanted to get the mood of the thread. I'm on break at the moment from writing due to burnout, so I'm figuring some things out. Sune is... an interesting one. I'm quite happy with it, but it went places I didn't expect. This story was... actually meant to be crack at first, and also just showing off the MG universe since that fandom is very... dead. But then I started to focus more on the culture clash, the drama, and heavily on Baeran's own mental health which surprised me. Baeran was meant to be a perfect, shining figure, a parody of overpowered D&D characters, and he was meant to basically have an unwanted harem due to him being immune to their charms.

That, as you can see, didn't happen. And as of late it has been heavily focused on Baeran and his issues. Was hoping to get ya'lls thoughts so far on the story.
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Your story does bring a smile to my face.

I loved the seen with the bovine? Monster girl who knew everything that was going on but refused to explain it plainly. Just like a real exposition machine
 
Calico J said:
The setup of a dramatic difference in cultural mores plus living in close daily contact is more than a good opportunity for a work to be a character study, it nearly demands it to some extent. I really don't see how you could avoid doing a lot of character development without the work suffering sharply for it. And since it's such a diverse, vivid and endearing cast, frankly every one of them so far would be worthy of doing a deep dive into.

Sorry, but if this was intended to be disposable fluffy crack, you executed it with too much quality for your own good.
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Thank you very much!
 
MGE is very frequently too much. You've performed a minor miracle in balancing out MGE's... MGE-ness, with very solid characters who I can get invested in.
 
I think the most important part of any story is its characters, because if you don't care about the people in the story, you won't care what happens to them. And that's where this story shines for me. Seeing Baeran develop, and seeing his relationships with the other characters develop, has been a real treat.
 
Shared History - Cidrom New
  • Apocrypha
    • Good chance to show the themes~

    Thanks to @SpacePaladin for the comm, they've asked for one of Cidrom, Fuyao, and Ignis! Cidrom is first.

    ---

    (What if for chapter 4.9)


    View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDtokWTVskI

    It's not a surprise when the doors burst open to reveal Cidrom. Her hand now a claw pressing against the wood, it's splintered and broken around it, falling to the floor in little more than disparate shards not unlike glass. Then she's upon you, Cidrom doesn't move so much as she glides, hurrying from the threshold to be at your side. "Baeran… speak to me."

    You lower your hands slowly, casting one more look at Sune before focusing on the dragon that only yesterday was claiming to be your wife, and now was looking at you like you were made of glass. You didn't much like that, glass was transparent, and you tried very hard not to be. "What do you want me to speak about Cidrom? I've said all I needed to say."

    Cidrom opens her mouth, then closes it. She looks away, arms crossing, hands reverting to their normal selves. "I… Baeran, how long have you been like this?"

    "In my chapel? Thirty secon-"

    "Baeran."

    You close your eyes and sigh. "I believe I was most blunt about it, Cidrom. I do not see the need to repeat myself again. There is little you can do to help me, there is little anyone can. Because I do not need help. I was born to perform my duty and I shall continue to perform it as well as I am able."

    "Sune doesn't need you to be an automata!" Cidrom roars.

    "But the realm does." You whisper. Then stand up fully, facing Cidrom, matching her gaze. "I wanted to be a hero, I became one. I just had to stop being a mortal to do so. It doesn't matter what I want Cidrom. It doesn't even matter what she wants." You bite, pointing at the mural of Sune. "What matters is what the world needs, what her followers need. You do not question the shrinking of a whetstone, you do not cry for the dulling of a blade. You replace, or resharpen. I have been replaced now three times, and I will be again, and again, and again until all the evils in this world are gone. I am not Elminster who hides until he is called, I do my duty, and I'm sorry that that offends you."

    Chill fills the air as the dragoness stares at me, mist coming out of her mouth. "Offends? You think it offends me? I've been with you as long as Fuyao has, I've seen you grow. I've seen you bleed. I'm worried about you. I'm entitled t-"

    "Then be entitled." You say, cutting her off. "I am Baeran Anderghast, Paladin of Sune, and many people are entitled to me in one way or another. You cannot change what has occurred, nor would I ask you to. This is not a good fate, but it is a useful one, and I would not go back."

    "You… you bastard." Cidrom says, her voice barely above a whisper.

    "So I've been called." You reply. "But you should not let it bother you. I merely want to resolve their situation so that I can move onto the next problem. I truly do not regret what has happened to me, Cidrom. Cruel as it may be, I'm… genuinely sorry that it bothers you, I wish I could fix your worries."

    Her hands grasp you by the front of the tunic and yank you forwards. And you stare at her, you were going to say something, but you freeze, transfixed by her changing face. Cold, blue eyes bore into your soul, cold eyes, and bone.

    "Do nOT SpEak tO Me oF saCrIfIcE." Cidrom snarls. Mist filling the room. "YoU… yOu ArE nOt THe onlY One."
     
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    • What does it say when the evil goddess was the better choice for him to talk to?

    Because jeez I'm impressed Sune didn't smite him right there for how utterly dismissive he was of her, not to mention how he talked to Cidrom.
     
    SpacePaladin said:
    Elminster gets another mention, we see that Cidrom has her own trauma, and Baeran's slip towards evil goes unmentioned.
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    Unmentioned, but demonstrated super well: the guy has decided what he will do and view everyone who wants him to stop as 'wrong, so I'll ignore you' He decided to rid the world of all evils, but has said in the canon chapter that he smells evil everywhere there is civilisation.

    This is a good showing of evil Baeran.
     
    Erien said:
    It doesn't even matter what she wants." You bite, pointing at the mural of Sune.
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    Wow. In her own chapter. He is very lucky that Sune likes him so much, because i don't think most paladins would get away with that kind of stuff.

    Yeah, he's definitely on the road to become a oathbreaker.
     
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    Metalbard said:
    Wow. In her own chapter. He is very lucky that Sune likes him so much, because i don't think most paladins would get away with that kind of stuff.

    Yeah, he's definitely on the road to become a oathbreaker.
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    Baeran is doing great.

    That aside, Cidrom just pushes him into deeper, and darker thoughts as her existence reminds him a bit of who he used to be.
     
    5.0 - Groupthink New
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    • View: https://youtu.be/AG2IAuhzbMc?si=uEOVB9qZ-Fj0W8pD

    [Accept]
    She… seems to know what is bothering you. More than anyone else.

    Thanks to @Armoury for the beta!

    —

    "I can help you."

    Funny little thing, that string of words. So innocent, so noble. They hadn't been uttered much to you, always the other way around. You were the hero, you had to be. You were steadfast, you had to be. You were stalwart. Because people needed you to be. And you were… evil.

    You were becoming evil. Why?

    Why would you be evil? Your convictions? Or was it where they were leading you. Your mind raced, thinking. You hadn't been turned away at the temple, but would they have even known? Would the Heartwarder? Were you that blind? Were you that foolish? You knew you were cursed, you knew you were faltering, but you had thought through service you would find a purpose in life, and that makes you evil? That makes you evil? Thirty years, a fifth of your lifespan, wasted? No, it couldn't be. She was lying, she had to be. But you confirmed it yourself… why? Was it residue from that dragon? Or… no. It couldn't be obfuscated except by magic, and neither you nor anyone else cast such a thing. You were… failing. Falling, the one task you had set out for yourself and you had faltered in i-

    A hand is placed upon your head, and your racing thoughts pause.

    You stare up at the face of the goddess, saying nothing. No words pass between either of you. Instead she gently lowers herself, her tattered robes catching on the floor as she gets down onto her knees. Then gently, ever so gently, she grasps you by the back of the head and pulls you into her shoulder. Her voice is barely above a whisper, a quiet tone that radiates desperation all the same. "Don't, don't let your thoughts go there mortal. I've seen it in too many men and women. Do not walk where I did, you are…" Ilias says nothing for several moments, simply holding you against her. She smelt rotten, rancid and unpleasant. But through it all, there was the faintest scent of grain, and a fresh spring day. "You are…" Ilias tries again, before clutching you tighter. "You can still go back, I can't, but you can still go back."

    You try to speak, try to do… something, but as the scent of spring becomes stronger, you find your words fail you. Your eyes sting, and you do something you hadn't done in many a year, you cried.

    "It's alright," Ilias says quietly. "You haven't harmed anyone, you can come back from this, you can recover. You aren't… a hero, but you are still a good man."

    "I… I need hel-"

    —

    *Fuyao POV*

    You burst into the chapel, panting, you could hear the rest of them at your rear. But they didn't know this place like you did, they didn't know how to get through it quickly like you did. There was only one place you knew he would be, only one place he'd want to be when he wanted to be alone. It was the place he always fled to on those darker nights. When he got quiet and contemplative. You had never questioned it, you should have. But why would you?

    You fucked up. You fucked up bad.

    Your boots skid along the stone, and you come to a stumbling stop. Just in time to se-

    "Get away from him!" you shout.

    You stumble forward, grabbing Ilias by the shoulder and shoving her back into a pew. You catch Baeran, holding him as he falls towards the floor, and glare at the 'goddess'. She lands with a crash, her back slamming into the wood and her body falling to the floor a moment later with a groan. You watch her, then turn to face Baera-

    You almost don't recognize him. His face, normally so rigid and stoic, giving a smile or a slight frown and little else. Is crestfallen, his eyes have lost their luster, no longer shining. His face was stained by tears, and he was staring at you in horror. Your eyes meet for a moment, only a moment, then he jerks away from you, shoving you back. You hold firm, holding him in place, holding him there. His strength, normally so beyond yours is feeble now, and his struggles are desperate, uncoordinated. Until, after a few seconds longer, he breaks, he stops fighting, he goes limp in your arms, his eyes unfocused, tears running freely down his face. His mouth opens, his lips move, but you can't hear any words. You lean in closer, ignoring the sounds of rapidly approaching footsteps behind you, and listen.

    "I'm sorry."

    You crush him against you, one hand pressing against the back of his head, the other wrapping around his waist. He's halfway on the floor now, the position is awkward, the man is heavy. And Sune herself couldn't remove you from him at the moment. "It's alright Baeran, it's alright. I'm here… there's nothing to be sorry about."

    "I'm sorry."

    "It's alright, it's alright." You say in quiet, hopefully calming tones. This wasn't your specialty, it was never your specialty.

    A hand on your shoulder, a ghost of your touch. And Brynhild is kneeling beside you, without a word she wraps her arms around Baeran's shoulders, not pulling him away from you, but simply holding him.

    "We aren't upset." Brynhild says, her voice a whisper.

    "I'm sorry."

    A snort. "Be sorry when you're dead." Then a hand on his back, large and scaled that radiates warmth.

    You look up, Baeran was crying openly now, babbling words that weren't. Ignis was huddled in close, her massive frame not letting her get much closer. Brynhild wasn't better, but Baeran didn't seem to mind. Hell, you weren't even sure he knew they were here. They weren't the only ones either. Isabella was standing just a foot away, a hand placed on her shoulder. She had said nothing, which was a surprise. She was just standing there, a worried expression on her face. Miki was right beside her, arms crossed, looking equally worried but not getting any closer.

    You continue to hold him to you, running your hand gently along his back. "It's alright Baeran, it's alright." Then you turn your attention to Ilias, she was staring at the lot of you, a… small smile on her face. It lasted until Cidrom walked up, placing her hand gently on the top of Baeran's head, and whispered something in a language you couldn't understand.

    Baeran's babbling stopped, and his breathing calmed. Cidrom stared down at him, her face vacant of any expression. Then she turned her focus onto you. "Did he say anything?"

    You raise a finger, and point it at Ilias.

    Cidrom turns her head around with all the threat of a ballista being aimed. To Ilias credit she doesn't flinch as the dragoness steps towards her. "What. Happened. Here?"

    Ilias stares up at the dragon, saying nothing for a few moments. Then turns her gaze towards the stained glass window depicting Sune. "Let us have this conversation elsewhere. I do not enjoy this place."

    —

    "Dragonshit." You say, staring at the 'goddess' sitting in front of you. "I know he's stressed beyond anything else, hell, I know he's stubborn as an ox. But he isn't in danger of falling."

    The dining room had been converted into an impromptu interrogation chamber, namely, Illias was sat in a chair in the center of it, with the rest of you surrounding her.

    "I do not lie, not anymore." Ilias says, staring up at you. "It gets me nowhere. I went in there to find him believing himself alone in the world, apart from other mortals. With no purpose beyond that of his duty and mission that he set for himself. I had succeeded in having him open up, when you barged in just as he realized he wasn't the man he believed himself to be."

    Your hand reaches down for your dagger… when a hand grasps your wrist. It's cold, and pale. You turn your head to see… Isabella shaking her head. "She isn't lying."

    "How would you know?" Ignis asks, sounding annoyed, she had sounded annoyed for a good while.

    Isabella reaches up to tap her nose. "I'm evil, and I can smell evil. Got it from my dad. Ilias reeks, like rotten garbage… and Baeran has started to smell like her. Nowhere near as bad but… yeah."

    You stare at Isabella for a short eternity, then turn your gaze back to see Ilias smirking at you.

    "I. do not. Lie." Ilias repeats. "I offered to help him, because I believe he could still be saved."

    "And what could you offer 'im?" Brynhild asks.

    "An example of what not to be." Ilias replies, "he thinks himself above you all, but not out of… dislike. He simply knows he is stronger, so he wishes to maintain that. He wishes to be helpful, he wishes to have a purpose. And he will defend that to the death, he is willing to forsake any form of stability as long as it helps another. He said he believed only one being would be able to stop him, which means he realizes how powerful he is."

    "... Tyrant." Miki says quietly. "He would become a tyrant."

    "A tyrant of great purpose perhaps," Ilias rolls her eyes. "Some would hate him, most would love him, but a tyrant still."

    "Baeran wouldn't." You hiss.

    "You hope." Ilias replies.

    "And what would ya know about it?" Brynhild asks.

    Ilias turns her gaze lazily towards Brynhild. "Tell me monster, do you believe I wound up deprived of my powers, crashing into a field of my own free will? I am a goddess, I was a demiurge. And I am, or was, a tyrant."

    "You sound proud of that." You reply.

    Ilias shrugs her shoulders, the tattered remains of her robe shifting slightly, revealing scarred flesh around the shoulder. "I was, until the man I adored taught me otherwise. Of course, it came at the cost of everything I held dear." She leans forward, staring at you. "I asked Baeran to kill me, he didn't. Perhaps that was fate, perhaps it is simply a joke from whatever deity made this realm. But I would not see him walk the path I did."

    "He won't." You say quietly.

    "He didn't seem to care much about your opinion regarding it." Ilias counters.

    Cidrom shakes her head. "Be that as it may. What he needs now is rest." She turns her head to focus on you. "I'm not letting him out of this mansion, Want to inform his mother that he's fine?"

    You hesitate for a moment, fuck no you don't. You want to stay here with him, but…

    …

    You nod. "I can."

    Cidrom nods back, then turns to look at Ignis. "Go to the Temple of Ilmater, see if they have anyone there that needs help. Baeran won't rest otherwise. Take Brynhild and Isabella with you."

    "Er… I… " Ignis starts.

    "I can send a clone with you to guide you there, they will not turn you away under any circumstance." Cidrom continues, then she turns her attention onto Miki. "You there, alchemist. You said you're good at this."

    "Best alchemist in Zipangu." Miki replies.

    "Good, you're going to help me find out what's wrong with him. Got it?"

    "And what of myself?" Ilias asks, innocently.

    "Be grateful I haven't removed your head from your shoulders." Cidrom snarls, turning to face the goddess. Then she pauses, staring down at her. The dragoness turns her head then to Ignis. "Take her with you. I don't like her being a distraction here."

    "Aight," Ignis walks past you, moving up to the chair, then, with a yelp coming from the goddess, she picks up Ilias up by the back of her robes and carries her out of the building. Isabella, Brynhild, and a copy of Cidrom following. You watch them go in silence, then turn your attention back to Cidrom.

    "... What are you thinking?"

    Cidrom lets out a long, and slow breath.

    "That he needs to be beaten within an inch of his life then go on a long vacation somewhere." Cidrom says. She turns her head, looking towards the ceiling as if it contained answers.

    You shake your head, knowing he would never agree to it… well, perhaps the former at the moment. But definitely not the latter. Pushing yourself up from your chair, you followed after the mass, your thoughts a mess.

    …

    Why didn't he ever tell you?

    Weren't you good enough for that?

    —

    *POV Vote*

    [] [Ignis]
    An Ushi-Oni, a cult. A whole lot of running and shouting. A chance for answers.

    [] [Fuyao]
    An explanation, a plan, a mother's prerogative. A change for the better.

    [] [Miki]
    Research, quiet conversations, secret admissions. Progress towards a solution.
     
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    • Erien said:
    "Don't, don't let your thoughts go there mortal. I've seen it in too many men and women. Do not walk where I did, you are…" Ilias says nothing for several moments, simply holding you against her. She smelt rotten, rancid and unpleasant. But through it all, there was the faintest scent of grain, and a fresh spring day. "You are…" Ilias tries again, before clutching you tighter. "You can still go back, I can't, but you can still go back."
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    This is one of the really delightful things about Ilias as a villain, she's evil, and we know exactly why and how she got there, she's a walking tragedy and who expected to feel so much pity for the villain of an H-game?

    Erien said:
    "I… I need hel-"
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    The first and most important step in getting help, acknowledging that you need it.

    Erien said:
    A snort. "Be sorry when you're dead." Then a hand on his back, large and scaled that radiates warmth.
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    Good girl Ignis, never too late to change.

    Erien said:
    Your hand reaches down for your dagger… when a hand grasps your wrist. It's cold, and pale. You turn your head to see… Isabella shaking her head. "She isn't lying."
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    Hm, not quite who I would expect to intervene here, but it's good to see more from Isabella.

    Erien said:
    Cidrom shakes her head. "Be that as it may. What he needs now is rest." She turns her head to focus on you. "I'm not letting him out of this mansion, Want to inform his mother that he's fine?"

    You hesitate for a moment, fuck no you don't. You want to stay here with him, but…

    …

    You nod. "I can."
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    Ah, I'm sure that pretense to his mom that he's fine will last approximately .001 seconds.

    Erien said:
    Why didn't he ever tell you?

    Weren't you good enough for that?
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    No, no, Fuyao, he just wanted to protect you and didn't realize that doing so would only hurt you.

    Man, I want to see all of these point of views, but I think...

    [X] [Miki]
    Research, quiet conversations, secret admissions. Progress towards a solution.

    Let's see some steps towards breaking a curse or two.
     
    Nice chapter. Not much happened, but it now the monster girl party is starting to take a more active role beyond staying at Baeran's mansion.

    [X] [Ignis]

    They all feel important, but I want to catch up on Ignis and her thoughts on being a paladin/making Baeran fall in love with her.
     
    [X] [Miki]

    A little coolheaded analysis of this chaotic situation seems like a good idea. Define the problem, identify the contributing factors, set a goal, lay out a course towards it. Nothing here we can't handle eventually! Right? Right?
     
    Hope ya enjoyed, still learning to write in a new direction here. Sorry if not much happened.
     
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