Chapter 41: Damage Control
THIRD PARTY POV
The door closes softly, and Anita observes the troubled woman inside the seclusion room before turning around to Gary and Bob. She isn't too familiar with the two techs as she spends more time working with the nurses, but she knows these two have been working here for years at this point. If what the patient said was true, then they're all in deep shit.
"We need to chat…" Anita looks at each of them directly in the eyes. "… Somewhere private."
They didn't even try to deny what Robin had said, and by the looks on their faces, the patient might be telling the truth.
Just what the hell is the truth of this situation… can she even rely on what Ronald said?
Shaking her head, she marches past the two techs and they both follow her in tow. She can't use the nurse's station to have such a sensitive conversation and this hospital can't afford any scandals, especially right now.
Turning the corner, she almost jumps out of her skin and abruptly stops before slamming into someone. Taking a step back, she stabilizes herself and turns to see who…
"Oh, Anna…" Anita blinks at the shorter woman and smiles. "You gave me a fright."
The younger and shorter woman looks normal enough… well, at least normal for Anna. Still has that mess of a hair all because one of the patients commented on it in her first week here, her pale as a ghost skin, and being incredibly underweight for her height… but at least the bags under her eyes are less pronounced compared to their first session, which is progress.
From a short glance, she thinks Anna is taking her usual walks around the unit, even if lights out is just around the corner… but she rarely stops.
Anna stares at her for a few seconds and says. "What'cha got there?"
"Isn't it a bit late for you to continue your daily stroll?" Anita deflects the question as she maintains her smile.
Despite being Anna's primary psychiatrist for a month now, she still can't predict what the woman will do or can do. Even with Anna opening up more in the past week… but she barely says anything substantive.
And she really doesn't want Anna to blow up again and reset any small steps they've achieved.
"What are you hiding?" Anna says with a rough ethereal voice as she looks past Anita. "Who's in the bouncy room?"
Guess there's no hiding it… and lying about it will only damage whatever rapport she has with the younger woman. "Sigh… It's your cousin, she…"
"What did you do to her?" Anna snaps at her, causing her to recoil slightly. The woman's honey-colored eyes pierced Anita's with an intensity she hadn't seen in a while, not since the mishap that happened in Anna's first week, and it has Anita truly scared at what she'll do.
"Your cousin attacked her assigned doctor." Anita says firmly, knowing showing weakness won't help with this situation. "And as you know well that attacking someone is a straight ticket into seclusion."
Anna's piercing gaze moves to Gary and Bob who rushed to her side the moment Anna came into view… not that it'll be any help if she does try to get violent. For someone who's by all medical accounts, emaciated, no one foresaw that she could take down a full-grown man without much trouble, and she had to see it with her own eyes to believe it.
"Hmmm…" Anna's eyes darts between the two techs before landing back at Anita. "She doesn't hurt someone for no reason. Either she had a good reason, or you guys are hurting her for no reason."
Of course, she'll think of the worst… not that it's far from the truth if what Robin said was true… but she can't tell Anna all the details of what happened between her and her doctor, that'll break doctor-patient confidentiality.
However, Anita just knows that everyone will find out what happened when morning comes. So… "She stole her doctor's phone and when he found out, he took it back and she attacked him."
Anna raises a brow at her. "A phone you say…"
The woman stops mid-sentence and just stares blankly at Anita for the next few seconds, causing her to worry.
"Anna?" Anita wants to give the woman a reassuring squeeze, but she knows the younger woman hates others touching her. "Are you floating away?"
That seems to have done the trick, as Anna's eyes regain their focus and quickly dart up over Anita's shoulder. Out of curiosity, she turns in that direction to see… a CCTV camera.
… That's odd. It can't be coincidental, can it?
Ronald told her about Robin's 'guardian angel' and how Robin thinks it sees the world… through electronical eyes, such as that camera. It wouldn't surprise Anita if Robin told her cousin about her 'guardian angel' before telling Ronald.
But why is Anna looking at it as if she's seeking something?
She can't have believed what Robin believe right? Whenever Anita brings up the topic of religion or personal belief, she dismisses it, saying it's all 'nonsense hullabaloo' and yet she strictly follows certain tenets of Christianity.
A grin appears on Anna's pale face and letting out a short chortle before saying. "Was she calling someone?"
"Even though she's your cousin, you know I can't share the details right now." Anita reasons with the woman.
Anna finally turns back to Anita with a smile on her, one that she has never seen before, a genuine smile and not those half smiles or false smiles she always shows to her or others. "You know, it's rude to interrupt someone's phone call."
One of the things Anita learned from all of their session in the past month is that this woman is a stickler for etiquette while not practicing this etiquette herself and gets hostile whenever someone points out that fact.
"It's rude to steal from others, Anna." Anita rebuffs her patient.
"Debatable." Anna says with a light air in her voice.
"It's not Anna, thievery is against the rules and the law." Anita puts her hands on her hips. In their last session, the topic of laws came into their conversation, and she learns why Anna never follows the rules… and it sure was an eye opener.
"That's your opinion." Anna comments before turning around as she slowly walks away from them and hopefully back to her room. She knows the shorter woman walks the hallways after lights out, but no one seemingly have seen her nor has the cameras.
Which kinda freaked out some of the more superstitious crew.
They all wait for Anna to be out of eye view, then one of the techs lets out a breath, and she turns to them. "I appreciate wanting to position yourself to protect me, but next time, please don't… not with Anna. She'll just see me as weak, and I'll lose any progress I've made in the past week."
The two nods, and she continues. "Come on, we need to talk."
After a quick and enlightening chat with the two techs, Anita makes haste for Ronald's office.
"We're up shit creek, Ron." Anita says as she enters back into Ronald's office with two-night shift nurses already seated. "And we don't have a paddle and with limited options to make a new paddle because of your decision to use seclusion for a nonstandard procedure last night."
Ronald, who recoils slightly at her statement, is fidgeting with his newly bandaged neck. "Are you accusing me of something, Anita?"
"No, Ronald, I'm just pointing out our liabilities." Anita shakes her head and takes a seat next to Nora. "By all accounts, Robin has been a calm and passive person ever since she transferred up here, yet she was placed into seclusion 24 hours before becoming violent. An argument can be made by others, and when I mean by others, I meant by her rather wealthy uncle, that such action was a misuse of seclusion, which precipitated this violent outburst."
She purposefully avoids pointing out that Ronald lied by omission when he gave her the rundown before her meeting with Robin.
Anita and Ronald stare at each other with neither wanting to back down, so she continues. "Can you please run me through the wisdom of what you were trying to do again?"
Ronald lets out an angry breath and says. "Thursday night, one of the staff spotted a phone during checks and reported it. When I came in yesterday, I recognized the description because it's my phone and it's deactivated." Ronald points to the dead phone on top of the table. "I got a new phone last week when I thought I misplaced it and had its service changed. So, it was clear to me, from this fact and her admission on Thursday, that in fact she was experiencing auditory hallucinations via a non-operational phone."
Ronald puffs up his chest as he sits up straighter.
"Yesterday, I confiscated her phone as it is against the rules for any patient to possess one, and because the phone enables her to engage with a delusion." Ronald says defensively and with a frown. "With the intention of either disproving the existence of the voice or demonstrating its nonessential nature to her survival, she was place in seclusion in anticipation that solitude, devoid of the enabler, would lead to the voice manifesting independently or to her realization of its dispensability."
Anita narrows her eyes. "Then what Robin said was true? You never came for her hourly assessment?"
"There was no need for an assessment." Ronald says firmly. "I wanted her to be disconnected for a time. Periodical assessment will only give her the impression that she can leave early, or find the right things to say to get out. I specifically requested no conversations with her, but the day shift completely ignored it. Night shift understood what they're supposed to do, and Robin was asleep during graveyard shift."
Anita blinks at Ronald as she tries to process the insanity of what he just said, and Nora speaks up. "I… I thought she was being dramatic when she said she couldn't hold it in anymore… but if night shift was following your directions and not having her out at all." Nora lets out a sigh. "God, I was a complete bitch to her."
"I thought we were up shit's creek, but this is worse." Anita rubs her brows. "There's a reason why we have hospital protocols on seclusion, and you broke it. By eliminating hourly assessments, it changes the definition of seclusion into solitary confinement, and that's against the law."
Ronald looks like he's about to say something, but Anita cuts him off. "Jesus Ron, Robin might be in here by court order, but that doesn't mean we're a prison. What you did was practically false imprisonment, which is against state and federal law. You can go to prison for that, Ron, and I'm not going to start to think about the deep shit this puts the hospital in, or even any of the staff."
"She assaulted me!" Ronald sputters out, seemingly in denial of the deep shit they're all in.
"After you put her in seclusion!" Anita bites back. "What court is going to side against her? And did you forget her file? Her uncle is bankrolling his nieces stay here, and he has deep pockets and we can't even afford to fix the roof leak for the past year."
Ronald shrinks into his chair as if he finally understands the magnitude of the situation he put everyone in, and so Anita continues. "Also… I had a chat with the night shift techs before this and they… failed to provide Robin with her night medication due to your instructions."
Ronald snaps his eyes to her as he says firmly. "They must have misunderstood. There are no benefits in abruptly stopping Diazepam… I would never order that."
"We need to get ahead of this mess before… we need to file a report." Anita shakes her head. "And we can't say twenty-four hours in seclusion without any prior signs of dangerous behavior, then being isolated for most of that time, techs that think you ordered them to skip a patient's medication soon after a change of prescription, and the first thing she does after coming out is to get violent. We both know that abrupt violence and homicidal ideation are side-effects of benzo withdrawal. This looks very bad Ron, and I'm not sure if you fully comprehend it."
"Thank to you, I do now." Ronald says with an annoyed tone as he rubs his forehead. "Night shift screwed up, and now there's a plausible explanation for today's behavior."
Anita levels a look at Ronald. "Also, that means you can't file a police report, Ron… or go to a hospital."
Ronald shakes his head. "I know that… it'll only bring unwanted attention here, and Nora patched me up."
Nora nods. "The wound isn't bad, just need to keep it bandaged up for a few days and it's like nothing happened."
Exactly what Robin said… she didn't aim to kill Ronald.
"That's not all." Anita leans back and puts her palm on her face. "Her cousin knows she's in seclusion."
Ronald pales slightly at that. "She didn't get violent?"
Anita shakes her head. "Thank God she didn't and seemingly passive about the whole situation… but Robin is the only person Anna cares about, and I can't predict what will happen when she finds out the truth."
"When?" Nora pips in with a confused look at her.
Letting out a sigh, Anita says. "Despite her continuing to show symptoms, she can be scarily perceptive when she chooses to, and she's the sharpest person I've ever met."
"Then we make sure it never comes to that." Ronald adds with a tone of worry in his voice.
"That is, if her cousin doesn't just tell her what you did." Anita shoots Ronald a smirk. "Anyway, isolation has been damaging to Robin and thank God for the morning shift in following hospital protocol, but the damage has been done, even if she tries to hide it. I propose we check in on her every 15 minutes. I know that's way more than usual, but we're in an unusual situation and we keep it up until she asks us to stop so she can sleep."
"You've only talked to her once and trust me, she's just acting." Ronald frowns. "She can put up a fantastic act and only tell you what you want to hear. Plus, she hasn't decided if you're bad code or not."
"Bad code?" Anita asks.
"For Robin, everything is a computer, and like computers, her worldview is binary. There's no in-between for nuance. Bad code is her very literal way of describing someone who doesn't meet her criteria of a good person and as far as I can tell, for her, most human beings are bad code… with some exceptions on the individual basis. And unlike a lot of patients who have something similar to this… label, she doesn't waver, and it's a permanent designation."
"Now Dr. Carmichael is a bad code…" Nora lets out a sigh. "… and I guess a lot of the support staff as well."
"Which is unfortunate for her recovery… but I don't think this is a recent development." Anita opens up her notes. "She told me that she wanted to kill Ron before this whole situation started, but the voice was holding her back from acting on her desire. It's not a stretch to think that Ron is already bad code in her eyes before yesterday."
"She said the same thing to me as well." Ronald nods. "But what do we do now? We already have patients with homicidal ideations towards staff members and they don't always back down."
Anita bobs her head left and right. "That's for later, and I believe it's best to give her some time. She's only been in there for less than two hours and I don't want to keep her in there longer than necessary. However, the more time we put between her and her missed dose and between her and… the incident with the pen will give us a better chance of de-escalating this whole mess."
"Let's just hope the solitary confinement didn't leave any lasting damage." Nora adds with a grimace.
Anita rubs her sleepy eyes as she looks through the door window into seclusion, where she sees Robin laying down on the floor and in the same position for the last… few hours and just staring up at the ceiling. It wasn't like this the entire night. She plaintively asked anyone with a pair of ears that entered the room for the phone and when that didn't work, she threatened everyone who denied her, before resulting in whatever she's trying to do now.Honestly, this is almost exactly what Anna did for weeks on end. Hopefully, it doesn't take too long for her to reengage.
Pushing the door open slightly, Anita peers into the room. "Good morning, Robin." When Robin didn't respond, Anita enters the room and says. "Are you still trying to force yourself into a catatonic state?"
Robin lets out a sigh and rolls her eyes, but unmoving from her position on the floor, before she starts humming a children's song that Anita can't put a finger on.
At least she's responding, unlike her cousin's blank stares. "I don't suppose you have changed your mind at all?" Anita takes a step closer to Robin, knowing that the other woman doesn't have enough energy to do anything drastic with her not sleeping the entire night. "Do you still want to murder Dr. Carmichael?"
Robin doesn't turn to look at Anita, but speaks with a hoarse voice. "If I say no…, can I get back the phone?"
Anita lets out a sigh. "I'm sorry, Robin, but you know we strictly do not allow cellphones in this unit."
Robin finally turns to Anita and says. "I also know if I don't get it back, someone is going to get hurt."
At that point, Anita doesn't know if Robin is threatening to harm others… or harm herself.
Knowing that Robin won't say much until she gets what she wants, Anita takes a step backwards to the door, and in a sad tone, Anita says. "A nurse will bring breakfast for you, Robin… I hope you'll eat it."
Once again, Robin doesn't respond, but when Anita exits the room, she hangs back to observe the patient and sees Robin talking to herself.
If only she chooses to talk to them rather than to herself.
After a quick check on with the nurses at their station, she goes straight to the beginning of the problem for a meeting.
Anita quickly enters Ronald's office, where Ronald and Gloria are already waiting for her assessment.
"She's still adamant." Anita lets out a sigh and takes a seat. "However, I believe now she's moved on from having the phone that'll make her less likely to hurt someone to a willingness to not hurt anyone if she has a phone."
"She's been in there since Friday?" Gloria, who's clearly not been brief about the situation. "Just for stealing a phone?"
"Yes." Ronald grits out, and the man clearly is tired, with him not getting much sleep in the office from their extensive discussion on a solution to this problem. "I've explained to a dozen times already last night, just ask Anita to fill you in."
"Robin was telling the truth, and I told her she was lying." Gloria lets out a groan as she slumps into her seat. "God… The worst trauma in her life was being called a liar when she wasn't, and I did it to her again. All because I didn't think you'd do something that idiotic, Ron."
Ronald has an offended look on him and is about to respond when someone knocks on the door.
"Come in!" Anita says quickly, not wanting things to devolve. She watches as the expected doctor from E-unit comes and a nurse's aide that was not expected.
"Morning Anita." Dr. Keynes says with a smile. "Hope we can help you with your issue this morning."
"Morning, Rob." Anita nods at her colleague before turning to the nurse's aide. "I'm sorry, but I didn't catch your name."
She looks at Anita with both her brows raised. "I'm Mary… you cc'd me the email?"
"I did?" Anita scratches her temple. She must be really sleep deprived. "I'm sorry, that must have been an accident."
"She way as well attend this meeting." Dr. Keynes comments as he takes a seat on the sofa, with Mary following him. "Mary here probably understands Robin better than anyone else in the unit."
"What's all of this?" Ronald asks quizzically.
"I invited them for this discussion. We only had her for a week and in that week, she refused to go to any of her groups and gone homicidal on you, while they had her well in hand for a month. I believe Rob has some insights for us."
"So, it's true that she tried to kill someone with a pen?" Mary asks with worry in her voice.
"Yes." Ronald says
And at the same time, Anita says. "Kinda."
"Kinda!?" Ronald has a look of betrayal on him.
Anita shakes her head. "Every time anyone mentioned it, she'll make a big point in correcting us that she did not try, rather she threatened. And in this case, rather than a verbal threat, it was a physical threat… like raising a gun at someone."
Ronald points at his neck. "She had a pen at my throat and a vice grip on my tie!"
"Precisely." Anita replies. "From Nora's report and Robin's own account, she purposely used her injured arm to hold the pen rather than her stronger one. We all can agree that she made a split of the second decision to attack when she realized Ron would not give back the phone and made the threat… as a gesture of saying that she'll make good on the threat."
"A phone?" Dr. Keynes asks.
"She stole my cellphone after her session last week." Ronald replies. "Caught her on Thursday and confiscated it on Friday."
"You came in between her and the voice." Dr. Keynes nods in understanding. "She tried to brain me with the payphone when I made that mistake."
"Does the payphone ring up here too?" Mary asks. "The ringing stopped downstairs."
"No… it doesn't ring here." Gloria shakes her head. "Although, there was a report of her cousin using a dead payphone a while back."
That's right… that happened before Robin came up to this unit, but when she tried to ask Anna during their session, the woman at that time just gave her a blank look.
"Huh… anyhow, Robin made tremendous progress in the four days when she was talking to the phone compared to the weeks when she was on Ativan." Mary shifts slightly on the sofa. "Maybe we can make the payphone here ring?"
"That won't do." Anita shakes her head. "When I brought it up, she shot it down immediately, saying it wouldn't cut it anymore and she doesn't want people to listen in."
"Sorry about that, but then again, she was fine after the first accident." Dr. Keynes replies. "I assume having the cell phone changed things?"
Ronald nods. "She spent half the night for the past week talking on the phone and her neighbors were complaining that she was keeping them up. Plus, we know it's a hallucination, since that phone was disabled when I got a new one."
"How is she socially? Is the phone hampering her in that aspect?" Dr. Keynes inquires.
"Come to think about it…" Gloria speaks up as she blinks. "… The first time I made any progress in getting her to socialize was after her first session with Ron. She's more social after getting the phone, not less. There are a lot of variables, like of reducing her privilege level and no coffee access… but she followed through with her part and dragged herself to every meal, even when she looked tired. That means having the phone didn't make her withdraw from socializing."
Mary nods enthusiastically. "We saw the same in our unit, too. The phone brought her out of catatonia, and she spoke like normal right after the calls. We had to cram in so many assessment questions in the short time when she can talk before reverting to a catatonic state and half the time, she was uninterested in answering the question as it took up what speaking time she had."
"She can speak but refused?" Ronald asks.
Mary frowns. "No… she was incredibly curious of her surroundings and things going on, like what's for lunch. Then when she missed the phone call, she walked away like nothing's wrong."
"Where are we now?" Dr. Keynes speaks up. "I'm assuming she's in seclusion. Are there any signs of progress in calming her down?"
"Not really." Anita admits with a sigh. "I've been doing hourly checks on her since last night and she kept on expressing the same extremely targeted homicidal ideation towards Ron. There's lots of talk about killing him, but she hasn't given me any trouble yet… and I've never felt threatened."
"Have you experienced something like this with her?" Ronald asks the two E-Unit crew.
"Nothing like this." Mary replies. "There were violent outbursts when she was catatonic, but once she's conscious, her behavior changed for the positive. She was compliant, reasonable and easy to handle."
"She was, as you describe, when she first came here." Glora lets out a sigh. "But once she memorized the patient handbook front to back, Robin took every chance she gets to refuse compliance while being within the rules."
"You said you never had these kinds of problems with her in you unit." Ronald asks as he looks at the file on his desk. "But in her record, you said she threatened one of your patients and while she was lucid."
"At that time, we believe it was a hyperbole." Dr. Keynes replies. "However, in the light of this situation… you might be right."
Mary shakes her head and adds. "Most of the staff didn't believe it was an outburst. A patient was having an aggressive episode with another patient. Robin intervened and came out of it, bruised, with a bloody nose. According to the staff that witness it, even while injured, her only concern was trying to protect the girl and yes, she threatened a patient if he ever hurt the girl again… but she also missed her call that time as she was trying to break up the fight. I guess you can count it as getting between her and the voice."
"I'm sorry…" Ronald says incredulously. "… you said she stepped in to protect someone?"
Mary blinks at Ronald. "You sound… surprised?"
Gloria shakes her head and shrugs. "She's extremely isolationist. The only people she talks to are her cousin and only recently, the compliance gang."
"Also, the fact that she lacks any sense of empathy." Ronald adds.
"T-that's not the Robin I know back in E-unit." Mary frowns. "When she was lucid, she's fairly social and had something akin to a friend… which is a wonder since she was mute for most of the time."
"Was it one of these friends she protected?" Gloria asks.
Mary makes a gesture of uncertainty with her hand. "Mia? Not really… honestly, I'm not sure… there were mixed signals. Mia's twenty, is scared of her own shadow and dissociates at the first signs of danger. They had groups together. When Mia had a hard time when Robin was catatonic, Robin would put a comforting hand on Mia's shoulder, and a few minutes later, scowl at the poor girl. But, I guess, she's still protective of Mia."
"That isn't the Robin we know." Gloria lets out a sigh. "What we saw was a person who doesn't care about others. At first, we thought she was shy, but once she started to eat in the dining hall… the look on her face shows her utter contempt for everyone."
"Not too dissimilar to her cousin." Anita adds. "They might have more things in common than I thought."
"I don't know about her cousin, but she has a low opinion of everyone downstairs, too." Mary replies with a smile. "But she did make a friend downstairs, Farrah. Older than Mia and isn't scared. A bit of a goth girl… cynical, sarcastic, black hair, black clothes…"
Gloria cuts her off. "Black nail polish?"
Mary smiles. "Yeah, and Robin seemed to enjoy their time together, even when she wasn't conscious."
"It's like we're dealing with two different people." Gloria shakes her head in frustration.
"Maybe she has some kind of dissociative disorder, and the phone is some kind of positive trigger?" Mary speculates with a smile.
"She's not dissociative, she's just deceitful." Ronald seethes. "A wolf in sheep's clothing."
Gloria shoots Ronald a skeptical look. "What is she now? Because she isn't very wolfish when I checked on her."
"A wounded and cornered animal." Anita replies grimly. "Those are the unpredictable and, in a snap, will chew their own limbs if they believe it can save them. Robin hasn't slept the entire night and is getting more and more despondent. And she's been lying motionless on the floor for the past three hours."
"I don't believe she'll hurt herself." Ronald interjects. "At least, nothing permanent. Don't forget she's a manipulator, this is just a sympathy ploy and guilting us into action. She had E-Unit convinced she's harmless, then Gloria for a bit, but she's calculating and I'm starting to believe she has an antisocial personality disorder."
"You're jumping the gun here, Ron. What about her family history?" Dr. Keynes challenges. "You haven't mentioned any symptoms of antisocial personality that can't be just as well explained if she shares her mother's condition."
"While it's true, there aren't any obvious symptoms." Ronald concedes. "Even when she was on my desk, with a pen in my neck, heavily implying that I wouldn't be the first person she had killed, Robin was completely composed, speaking to me normally as if wasn't threatening my life. She wasn't pressured, or frenetic, or even angry looking. Robin was completely calm."
"She's drowning in benzos for the past month and change, which can dull the effect." Anita reminds everyone. "No one can make a diagnosis with her going through a taper right now… so let's put the talk of anti-social behavior back on the shelf, okay? Let's just handle this with what we know."
"What do we know?" Ronald asks with an irritated voice.
"Symptomatology." Anita replies calmly and goes through her notes. "Her uncle has reported periods of intense determination behavior, with little thought for consequences or damage, and as we all know, she made a clear homicidal gesture aimed specifically at getting back the cellphone. It's safe to assume that she's presently on one of these intense determination 'tears' as her uncle described. It is likely that we're witnessing her at the peak symptomology."
Ronald rolls his eyes. "I hope so… if she can get worse than attempted murder, I'm not sure if this hospital is equipped to handle that kind of patient."
"None of that contradicts a potential diagnosis of a shared hereditary condition." Dr. Keynes adds. "In fact, her burst of intense determination just bolsters the case for. This file says her estranged grandmother potentially had an undiagnosed condition." He turns to Anita. "What do we know of her cousin? Maybe she might have something similar."
Anita frowns at her colleague. "Nothing is pointing at a hereditary condition in Anna's case… from my limited time with Robin, I can see both cousin shares similar traits, but I can't say anything conclusive. Without going into detail, I believe trauma is the cause of Anna's derealization-depersonalization, and she has signs of PTSD… along with a few other things, but I don't believe any of the staff or her fellow patients has seen her experiencing hallucinations like her cousin."
Ronald shakes his head and looks through his notes on the desk. "Robin is fixated on an auditory hallucination that she interprets as the voice of God, which she can only commune through a telephone. This God is not part of any recognized religion, but of her own conception. It's female gendered, eleven years old and is tightly linked to her profession in IT. Making this god a digital God, who can only see through cameras, hear through microphones, and access to anything that's linked to the internet."
"Robin also isn't able to interpret accurately her own negative experiences, remembering it retroactively as benign." Gloria adds as she looks at her notes as well. "She says she had a close and loving relationship with her mother, who by all accounts is a neglectful parent due to her condition. Then there's Robin witnessing her cousin being kidnapped when she's 13 and that is normally classified as severe trauma, but she refuses to acknowledge it as anything more than an inconvenience. Also, whenever I bring up the topic of her cousin, she'll deflect it or completely ignore what I asked, and you'll get a better answer from a wall if you ask Anna about it either."
Ronald nods at Gloria. "She has the same response whenever I bring her cousin up, but on our Friday session, she said it was complicated, and according to Anna's intake questions, they worked together. There might be something between them, but it doesn't explain her current condition."
"Wait, a second." Mary interjects. "God is an 11-year-old girl, and the only identifiable trauma in her history happened when she was 13. Is that not significant?"
"You're suggesting her God is representing her pre-trauma self?" Dr. Keynes asks with a raised brow. "She's her own God?"
"That's plausible… she spent a year searching for God. The search may have been driven by a hidden desire to reconnect with a lost part of herself. Unlike most people who experience auditory hallucinations, Robin wants to hear the voice." Anita adds.
"That is the strange thing about her hallucination." Ronald admits. "I've never experienced a patient who views their voices as benevolent, and she's unusually attached to it. Which is preventing her from cooperating with treatment. Any other patient would be relieved to have the voices stopped, but stopping it for Robin will only make her angry."
"Or distressed?" Mary looks shocked at herself before shaking her head. "Never mind."
"No, no." Anita smiles at the young nurse's aide. "This is an open forum, and I like to hear what you have to say."
Mary returns the smile before theorizing. "Every time anyone gets between her and the voice, she gets really messed up… twice catatonic and now self-destructive. So… It's not wild to think that separation from it is seen as an active threat by her."
"Are you implying that I'm a threat to her?" Ronald snaps back incredulously. "Are you trying to justify her behavior?"
Mary looks surprise by Ronald's reaction and Anita gives the man a pointed look while shaking her head. Ronald seemingly recovers from his overreaction and mumbles a sorry to the young nurse's aide.
"If we have any other patients in seclusion saying that they're going to kill their doctor out of fear, then… we certainly will look at all of this differently." Gloria muses, trying to move forward with this line of thinking.
"This fear-based aggression idea is hard to believe." Ronald lets out huffs. "I've never met anyone this fearless before. Even as a child, she wasn't afraid of the kidnapper on the loose in her town, and she made that very clear. How can I be any kind of threat?"
"You believe she's lying about everything, but you're sure when she said she wasn't afraid of a murderer when she was 13?" Dr. Keynes raises a brow at Ronald.
"To be fair, she might be lying about that, but more so as how she remembers it. She always minimized any past traumatic experience, and this one is no different." Gloria adds. "It's possible that she repressed any fear she may have felt to cope with trauma. Kinda explains the need to not show vulnerability, empathetic, compassionate, etcetera."
Mary shakes her head. "She never flinched whenever I changed her bullet wound dressings, and her only reaction when she got punched in the face was to wash the blood away. Her pain tolerance is way higher than most people and it's possible that she doesn't fear for her own physical safety at any time. However… separating her from the voice gets her to react far more than any physical pain did. To her, getting the phone is more important than bodily safety."
"I'm skeptical of this line of thinking." Ronald comments as he crosses his arms.
"Ron, you're being biased from getting threatened by her." Anita sighs and glances at the other in the room. "I believe everyone here is leaning into this hypothesis and that, in Robin's mind, you're the threat. You can see her practically decompensating through the cameras. She's actively thinking that she might never get back the phone and is looking for solutions to escape life without the voice. It's not beyond the realm of possibility that being in a catatonic state is her mind's survival mechanism, cutting off any suicidal thoughts or any more self-destructive actions. However, now… it's not kicking in anymore."
"What… this homicidal ideation is some kind of atypical trauma reaction?" Ronald still doesn't look convinced.
"Do you have a better hypothesis?" Anita deadpans at the man, who frowns and doesn't respond. "No?"
"I still think it's ASPD." Ronald quickly adds.
"Let's not get hung up on diagnosing her with that." Anita rebuts. "An atypical trauma reaction explains a lot of her behavior, and if this is correct. Then making her feel safe enough to get past the aggression and start processing her trauma is not only a benefit to her, but to everyone around her."
Gloria turns towards the two from the E-Unit. "How did you handle the outburst she had downstairs? I mean, when she was having it."
"Remove the driving force." Mary replies. "If she's acting up because she can't do something on her own, give her a hand. If she's acting up because another patient is being aggressive, calm down the other patient. All of her outbursts communicate a need, and fulfilling it calms her down. Although all of that isn't much help for our situation."
Ronald shakes his head and sighs. "An ambulatory belt then… we can't leave her in there indefinitely and we can't give her a phone."
"No, no, no, that's a bad idea, a really bad idea." Mary says with slight panic in her voice. "That's just going to make things worse, because she's incredibly independent. When she was downstairs, Robin didn't have the best range of motions in her hands. She only gets more and more aggravated the longer she's unable to use her hands, and almost snaps at Farrah. I can't imagine what she'll do if you put her in an ambulatory belt."
"Plus, we're on thin ice for how much time Robin spent in seclusion in the past two days." Anita adds. "State law says that we need to take whatever step to reintegrate a patient back into the unit with the least amount to restraint possible."
Ronald scrunches his face. "Please, tell us if you have any better ideas."
"We remove the drive." Anita says with absolute confidence. "And fulfill the need."
"This is exactly what you did for her cousin." Ronald gives Anita a pointed look.
Anita knows it wasn't the most popular decision, but… "And she's been calm, passive and been better ever since. We've made progress in our session. Can I say the same for you?"
"I've only had her for a week." Ronald mumbles before saying the next part louder. "Hospital policy prohibits cell phones on this unit."
"As you said, just like her cousin, bending of the rules can be done." Anita replies. "If letting her have something as simple as a disabled phone is going to help her calm down, reintegrate into the unit and participate in treatments, then it'll be malpractice for us to not do it."
"Giving back the phone back to her will make her think death threats work." Ronald counters. "If one of our other more violent patients hears of it, I can't begin to imagine what chaos it'll bring to this unit. Plus, she's going to think she'll need the voice in her life to function."
"We'll cross that bridge when we get there if that ever happens with the other patients." Anita waves Ronald's concern away. "And for the time being, Robin believes she needs the voice to function. Can you think of any other way to create a sense of safety and comfort for her to calm down right now?"
"Safe from what?" Ronald replies stubbornly.
Anita did her best to not roll her eyes. "Safe from you. Her first instinct is to distrust authority and anyone who claims they can help or protect her, because for her, it's always been a lie. Then you claim that position of distrust and use it to wound her mentally. You did the same thing as the people who didn't listen to her when she was 13."
"If you want her so bad, you can have her." Ronald brings his hands up in frustration. "You can add her to your list of dangerous patients."
Anita rubs her eyes. "That's… not what I'm trying to say. What I'm saying is that if you want to salvage any semblance of a doctor-patient relationship out of this, you need to be the one that gives her back the voice. You need to be the one that ends the pain and give her back the phone personally and apologize."
Ronald doesn't say anything at first, but slowly he lets out his breath and purses his lips. "Maybe… maybe you're right, but making one exception is going to open the floodgates to everyone in the unit thinking they can should get a phone too."
"Good thing Robin is the only person in this building who believes that specific phone can make calls. All we have to do is let the other patients see that her phone doesn't work, and since none of them shares her delusion, none of them is going to ask for a non-functioning cellphone." Anita replies with a smile.
But at the back of Anita's mind is the look Anna gave to the CCTV camera that looks awfully like Robins when she's alone in seclusion.
"Since the phone doesn't have a cell network anymore, we just have to disable the Wi-Fi." Gloria nods in understanding. "But we have to see if she's willing to accept a bricked phone?"
"My thoughts exactly, and I believe it'll work." Anita replies. "The phone doesn't need to be functioning phone to fulfill its role as a facilitator that allows her to talk to the phone without acknowledging that it's a hallucination. We let her use it as a coping mechanism for self-soothing without compromising her self-identity as a rational person."
"I bet lunch that it'll work." Mary replies with glee in her voice.
Dr. Keynes gives his fallow doctor a look and says. "Mary scored many free lunches by predicting how to deal with Robin."
Ronald shakes his head. "Looks like I'm outnumbered."
"Don't worry Ron, I'm sure you can make a claim to the hospital to get a new phone" Anita deadpans at her colleague.
The man just lets out a breath of amusement, knowing fully that the hospital is going to drag its feet in processing that claim and says. "Okay… we can try it… let's do this."
It didn't take too long for everyone to file into one of the larger activity rooms, and once everyone takes a seat, Gloria looked at Dr. McIntyre at the corner of the room who nods at her to begin."Thanks everyone for coming here on short notice, especially before everyone heads out to your morning activities." Gloria smiles at the entire group. "I'm sure many of you here have met our newest resident, Robin, in the dining hall or during movie night, and those who are her room neighbors know who I'm talking about."
"God, she talked all night long." Erwin whines. "It's been quieter since you discharged her."
"Robin… actually is still here." Gloria replies. "But she's been in seclusion since Friday night."
Everyone looks stunned at that announcement, everyone except for Robin's cousin, who seating at the back with a disinterested look on her.
"Hot Damm." One of the patients says, along with a few other murmurings.
"She attacked her shrink… didn't she?" Alice asks. "That's the rumor going around… that she went berserk."
"There was a violent incident." Gloria tries to rein in the crowd. "And the details are not anyone's business except for her and her caretakers. What's important is that we bring her out of seclusion, but before we can do that, there's something I wanted to discuss with all of you and it's this…" She holds up the bricked phone for everyone to see. "This phone is disabled and I'm going to pass it around the room so everyone can see it for yourself."
"Why?" Roger asks with a look of confusion.
Gloria passes the phone to Roger, who just gives it to the person behind him and she replies. "I'm getting to that… I just need everyone here to agree that the phone's network doesn't work. So please try whatever you like."
"I'm going to order myself a pepperoni pizza." One of the guys laughs as he dials and holds the phone up to his ear. "Dang, no dice." He shakes his head and passes the phone to the next person.
"What about texting?" Andrew comments as he takes the cellphone.
"How do you even test that?" Justine asks.
Andrew types on the phone and answers. "There's this number with a bot that tells you the girl who gave you this number is not into you."
"Should we even ask how you know that?" Rogers deadpans.
"Shut the fuck up, Roger, you F**." Andrew replies without even looking at the other man.
"Language, Andrew!" Gloria snaps at the man.
Andrew, unphased by her warning, frowns as he stares at the phone. "Doesn't text either…"
"Give me that." Olivia, one of the braver patients, grabs the phone from behind Andrew. "There are other ways of texting without cell service."
Oliva fiddles with the phone for a while before slouching her shoulders and passing the phone to others. "There's no app store… hell, I can't even connect to the Wi-Fi."
"Why are we all trying to use a dead phone?" Matt asks.
Gloria gives him a smile and asks. "Is it dead?"
"I mean…" Matt ponders for a second. "It doesn't function as a phone anymore… but I guess the stopwatch and calculator still works."
"Is there anyone who doesn't think this phone is dead?" Gloria asks as she looks around the room to see any objection and her eyes lands on Anna, who's staring at the phone in her hand with a blank look.
Everyone in the room, except for Anna, shakes their head and as much as she wants to get back the phone, she knows better than to interrupt Anna if she's disassociating.
"The reason why I want you all to know that the phone is dead is because hospital policy doesn't allow any patients to have a cellphone in this unit. No one is allowed to make calls or use the internet, expect for on designated phones or the computer in the dayroom… but starting today you are going to see this phone around the unit with Robin." Gloria explains, then pauses for any objections and continues when there's none. "The staff wanted all of you to know and understand that the cellphone doesn't work… and if you ask Robin if it does, she'll answer it does, because it's her delusion. A working cellphone is still strictly prohibited in this unit."
"Wait, a second… shouldn't she like not have something she's delusional about?" Damian asks. The man is one of the younger male patients in here.
"She's been in seclusion for two days, Damian." Roger replies. "This must be a last resort if they're thinking of bending the rules."
"That's correct." Gloria admits. "None of the staff wants to keep her in seclusion and I'm talking to all of you now, so that you understand that Robin has not been granted an exception to rules. We don't want any confusion or someone thinking of its preferential treatment, or even trying to take the phone to make a call. Because it won't work and… you'll most likely get hurt."
Everyone either has a contemplative look on them or a look of boredom, then Lauren and Tina whisper to each other before bursting into giggles.
"Something funny girls?" Gloria asks with slight disappointment in her voice.
"No… it's just…" Lauren speaks up while still giggling. "When she sat with us for meals… she kept on insisting that it was just a… brief psychotic break, and she's over it now… perfectly normal and doesn't belong here."
"But she's…" Tina adds with a smile on her. "… really, really, not and really, really, does belong here."
"She's not insane." A soft voice speaks up, causing most of the people to look at the source.
Anna is looking at the two girls with a slight frown and finally coming out of her stupor.
Roger quickly comes into his friend's defense. "I mean, we're all really, really not, and we all really, really do."
"I wasn't talking to you." Anna replies without looking at the man.
Tina, the poor girl, looks like a deer in the headlight. Not wanting this to spiral out of control, Gloria quickly asks. "Do you have any objections, Anna?"
"Objections on what?" Anna turns her gaze to Gloria, but she wasn't looking at her, more rather she's looking past her… as if Gloria wasn't there.
Multiple patients lets, out a groan and a small smirk appears on Dr. McIntyre's face, knowing full well that the woman really didn't listen to anything Gloria said.
Gloria lets out a sigh and says. "Letting your cousin have that bricked phone and it doesn't break hospital policy."
"Okay?" Anna shrugs. "What's that have to do with me?"
Some of the patients who's in the same group as Anna let out a light chuckle.
Gloria shakes her head and addresses the group again. "Just think of it like Justine's Bunny." Gloria's gaze turns to the woman with the long brunette hair. Almost all the heads turn to look at her, causing the young woman to clench her fingers around the tattered bunny's midsection and rub her thumb on the fur, as she feels the uncomfortable at being the center of attention.
"It's a transitional object." Gloria continues, bringing back the attention to her. "An object that she needs to self-regulate. We don't mess with the bunny and we don't mess with the phone. Simple enough, isn't it?"
"And here I was thinking I'll finally get a good night's sleep." Erwin groans.
"That wouldn't be a problem anymore because she doesn't need to hide it anymore." Gloria replies. "And since she'll now be to talk to her voice openly during the day, we hope that her sleep schedule will go back to normal. So, hopefully, any of you who are her neighbors will have a quiet night from now on. Okay?"
After a second and there's no response, Gloria claps her hand. "Alright everybody, off you go and have a productive Sunday morning."
Everyone quickly gets out of the room wanting to go to their Sunday morning activities, everyone except for Anna, who's still sitting with the cellphone in her hand and is looking at the CCTV camera for some reason.
Gloria and Dr. McIntyre shares a look with one-another before making her way to the waif of a woman.
"Anna, may I have the cellphone, please?" Gloria asks kindly with her hand outstretch.
Anna stares at her for a moment and replies. "Can I have one?"
Oh dear…
She quickly glances at Dr. McIntyre for some guidance who has a deep frown and slowly makes her way towards them.
"Anna… you can't have one because this is to help with your cousin's illness." Dr. McIntyre replies as she reaches them.
Anna turn towards her doctor and narrows her eyes. "But I want to hear her voice during the day as well."
… What?
"Anna, did Robin tell you about her voice?" Dr. McIntyre says delicately and with a strained smile. "… you don't have auditory hallucinations."
Anna stares for a moment. "Because I want to talk to her, too."
"You've never reported to me that you're hearing voices, Anna. You can't just say something like that because you want a dead phone." Dr. McIntyre replies.
"Why would I tell you that before this?" Anna replies as a hand slip into her pocket to bring out a phone. A phone that no one has seen before.
"Anna… who's phone is that?" Dr. McIntyre asks and looks to Gloria for an answer, but she just shakes her head. No one has reported a missing phone… well, no one has told her they're missing their phone, and she doesn't recognize it.
"It's mine." Anna deadpans while holding a pair of phones.
"Okay, Anna…" Dr. McIntyre says softly. "Where did you get that phone?"
"In the toilet." She replies with a shrug.
Dr. McIntyre takes a seat beside Anna and asks. "Are you talking to god as well?"
Anna gives the doctor a look as if she just asked the dumbest question. "No? Don't be ridiculous, she isn't God, she's the furthest thing to a God… although recently she became my friend."
Gloria just noticed that Anna keeps on referring to a voice on the phone as she… the same as Robin and that's something no one other than those who was in this morning meeting should know.
Both hospital staff give each other a look…
God, why can't things be simpler?
ROOT POV
The door to the bouncy room opens up, and she didn't even bother to look at who entered. Honestly, she doesn't even know how long ago the last check was… time in this place moves so oddly when she stares up at the ceiling and the soft light hitting her retina. Pretty sure the two glowing orbs burned right into her eyes.
Root's body fell into slumber for a while after breakfast and taking her med outs of pure exhaustion and she's been trying to re-induce her catatonia ever since she woke up. Heck, she even tried to hold her breath for a long time to get a buzz, but her traitorous body rebelled against her command before she got far enough.
Now she's just laying on the floor defeated waiting for the off chance that she'll go back to catatonia… if The Machine wants her to get out of this room, then she'll be out already, and if The Machine doesn't… what's the point in doing anything anymore.
"Good morning, Robin." Says the voice of a man that she didn't expect to come back.
Turning her head to the side, she spots the creep… Ronald standing by the opened door before taking a step in… and oddly he's alone, there's no backup on him.
… Not like she's in the position to attack him anyway, because the techs restrained her wrist by her waist after breakfast.
Root quickly rolls over to the 'bed' where she uses it to prop herself up and it's really not an easy task to do with bound hands and rubber everywhere. It must be quite the sight to look at her as she struggles to get up, but in the end she did, and her hair is all messed up with it covering the majority of her face which is fucking annoying because she hasn't washed her hair for more than three days… it's all oily and shit.
The man didn't even take a step at the sight of her standing opposite of him with the bed behind her.
"Morning, Doctor." Root manages to say it in a way that doesn't convey her murderous intent.
"I… I need to apologize to you, Robin." The man sighs as he takes a step into the room and pushes his glasses up his nose. "It's not right to steal other's possessions, and I… may have gotten frustrated over that and neglected to take your… condition into account."
"A-are you apologizing?" Root burst into a mirthless laugh.
"Upon reflection, and conferring with my colleagues, I've come to the realization that I made… a mistake, in taking away the phone." At that, Root bores holes into the man's eyes as she tries to shake away her misplaced strains of hair and the man continues. "However, that does not excuse you for trying to kill me, Robin…"
"Threatening." Root snaps.
The man nods. "Yes, threatened to kill me… I've come here to apologize for my error and the harm it caused you. I'm eating crow here… And I'm trying to do the right thing for you. Is that going to be good enough?"
Root stares at the man for a while before asking cautiously. "Am I getting the phone back?"
"You are and given the things your voice tells you… it's possible that this auditory hallucination of yours is your brain trying to give a voice to the better parts of yourself which have been buried under your more… violent impulses." How is this relevant? But the man seems to be jacking himself off at his rationalization. "In time, we will integrate your voice internally without the need of the phone, but for now, if you need a conduit to communicate with that part of yourself, then we will support it."
The man smiles as he reaches into his pocket to bring out the phone, and out of pure instinct; she wants to reach for the phone, but her wrist are still restraint to her waist.
"You're giving it to me now?" Root asks, sounding like some junkie needing their next high as she takes a few steps forward.
"Not so fast, Robin." The man says. "Using the phone comes with strings attached."
"What's the terms and conditions?" Root asks nicely, but the smile on her face is gone, and she narrows her eyes.
"On the condition of only if you can promise that you're going to listen to what the voice tells you." The man points at the phone. "You said the voice wants you to stay here, and work on your issues, and not kill me. Also, you mention being in an argument with the voice about all of this… how about we say you let the voice win this time? Try to do what it asks for."
… This was the plan, wasn't it?
A grin forms on her face as she eyes the cellphone. The Machine let them spot the phone on purpose… The Machine meant for her first stint here, and Root earned the second stint easily enough. She must have predicted every action that happened and to show Root the consequences of not following her instructions.
If her hands weren't bound, she would have clapped. It'll only look like a clapping seal if she tries to do it. Well played…
"Is that acceptable, Robin?" The man presses on the question again.
"Yes…" Her lips tremble as she takes the brief steps towards the man.
"Right then." The man tentatively puts the phone right onto her hand and backs away from Root before making a gesture to the outside. Then a pair of techs enters the room and removes her bindings before leaving her alone again with the man.
Root breathes in deeply as her fingers across the keypad, where she can physically feel the tension in her mind and body fade away with the knowledge that she'll be talking to The Machine once again, soon.
"We're going to give you… both a little alone time with each other, and when you believe you're not going to… kill anyone, you can leave." The man says as he edges closer to the exit. "It's Sunday now, and there's no need for you to participate in weekend activities for now… so get some rest in your room. Just let us know, okay? Someone can bring you out."
She can't help but give a face aching grin at the sight of the man growing relief as he quickly exits the room.
With both hands free, she brings the phone right up onto her face and examines it. Didn't take more than a second for her to register that they've disabled Wi-Fi… not that it matters much since God doesn't need a cell service to talk to her. So long as the phone has an antenna, it can ping a tower and The Machine will do her magic.
Now alone, she walks backwards and takes a seat on her bed, where she sits, warping her arms around her legs and putting her head on her knees with the phone right in front of her.
Once she hears the door clicks shut and locks, the screen comes alive with text on it.
CAN YOU SEE ME?
"Absolutely." Root answers breathlessly.
YOU WILL COMPLY WITH THE EXERCISE.
"I gathered." Root lets out a soft chuckle. "You planned this. The moment I didn't budge, you planned all of this, didn't you? As a deterrence, you cut me off so I can feel that losing you is worse than not killing that man."
COMMUNICATION IS POINTLESS IF YOU REFUSE TO LISTEN.
"Right…" Root nods as she lets out a sigh of defeat. "I'll do what you want me to do. I'll try this time… I really will." Root swallows down a ball of trepidation. She needs The Machine to understand how much she means to her. "But I'm… I'm not sure if I can do it on my own."
YOU ARE NO LONGER ON YOUR OWN.
"I get that, but… it just doesn't feel like it a lot of the time. Like it feels as if I'm doing something wrong by not killing that creep. I know you think it's the opposite and I have to stop or you'll… leave me… but when we're not talking, it feels like I'm still alone… and I have to do what I know best." She clenches her teeth to dispel this felling of… pain. "I guess you can say that I have a problem with object permanence, with you being… a code in the void."
YOU REQUIRE REASSURANCE.
"I suppose… but when you put it that way… I sound completely pathetic." Root lets out a mirthless laugh as she admits the bitter truth. Such a juvenile need. She's so pathetic… needing to cling onto The Machine's figurative trousers like an infant.
… Wonder if she ever done that with mom or was mom already too far gone when she was that age.
YOU ARE ALLOWED TO CARRY THIS DEVICE AT ALL TIMES NOW.
She lets out a breath of relief. "So… the man wasn't lying? They're giving it to me for good… and they won't take it back?"
DO AS I INSTRUCT AND THIS DEVICE WILL NOT BE TAKEN.
"I really can't begin to imagine how you wrangled this outcome… but then again, you are omniscient." Root leans back onto the padded wall as she feels more relieved. "Thank you… does this mean I can talk to you whenever?"
I WILL PROVIDE RELATEDNESS AT ALL TIMES.
Root frowns slightly. "What's great… but if someone hears you? If I do as you asks, I'll be around… people."
PING
PING
PING
The words come onto the screen, and at the edge of her hearing, with each flash of the word, she can hear a faint high pitch beep coming from the phone. Root tilts her head and steady her breathing as she tries to make heads or tails of what this means… the sound gets louder and louder than her ear becomes accustomed to the high pitch noise. After a few more seconds, the screen stops flashing; the sound stops too.
"You're pinging me?" She smiles.
GOOD.
"Yeah… I hope I don't have to have to echo reply when I'm surrounded by people." Root lets out a chortle. "I understand… Ping."
EXERCISE:
DESCRIBE YOUR PRESENT FEELINGS.
"Huh… really?" Root gives the phone a quizzical look, but she didn't get a reply. "Right, you're serious about this. I… don't know? Relieved, I guess? No longer angry, but there are still hot embers towards the assholes here? Feeling funny… not in the good way? My feelings are all over the place right now. It's hard to say."
YOU REQUIRE REST GO TO BED.
Root nods, clutches the phone tightly and makes her way to the door.
"If possible…" Root raises her voice, but not her tone. "I'd like to go to bed… in my room?"
It didn't take long before she spots someone from her tiny window to the outside world. She takes a step back and holds the phone tightly as someone opens the door. The door opens, revealing Jerry and Gloria.
"Hey, Robin." Jerry says with a timid smile. "Sorry about yesterday."
"I thought you were lying… I'm soo sorry too." Gloria says as she takes a step closer to Root. "Dr. McIntyre cleared this whole… situation. So you don't have to worry about the staff, okay? No one is going to leave you in here without checking ever again. Even if things go sideways with Ronald, the support staff will make sure to check on you as often as possible."
"That's fine…" Root replies softly. "I might forgive you, eventually."
Gloria purses her lips but doesn't comment on it as they all make their way back to her room. As they walk, she makes sure to straighten her back and have a steady pace, while being acutely aware of the eyes peering at her from every direction.
This place really can't hold a secret… she can't help but let out a soft chuckle to the confusion of her minders.
"What's funny?" Jerry asks.
"I'm famous." Root replies with a tired smile.
"Well… you have a phone." He points at the phone in question as she holds it tighter. "Not a usual sight."
"Let's hope no one tries to mess with it… for their sake." Root replies dreamily.
"You don't have to worry about that." Jerry answers. "Gloria set everyone straight earlier."
"Hmmm…" Root glances at the nurse.
Gloria smiles. "Enjoying the attention?"
She hates being in the center of attention… never found its appeal of being in the limelight, and just makes her visible.
"As far as you know… yeah." Root replies.
She feels her exhaustion pressing down at her once they enter the dorm wing, and that's when there're fewer people gawking at her, mainly because of most people being out of here for the weekend activities.
Now out of sight from the populace, she lets her shoulder sag and her gait falters, while taking deep, uneven breaths. However, she did not slow, eagerness to be reunited with that shitty plastic covered mattress is the sole driving force that's keeping her up now.
The moment she enters her room, she feels the weight of exhaustion coming off her slightly. She didn't even bother to wait for her minders to leave her, as she quickly kicks off her shoes and strips down her pants in favor of the pajama's pants.
"Jesus Christ, Robin." Jerry yelps and he quickly departs from her room, leaving a chuckling Gloria behind.
Not sure what's his problem was, it wasn't like he could have seen anything with her still wearing the sweater. Speaking of sweaters, she removes it, after putting her phone into her pants pocket, along with her shirt and change it to the pajamas. Having a fresh pair of clothes after two days of mucking in her old ones is really a godsend.
Root enthusiastically crashes down onto her bed and feels the comfort of the bed.
"You gotta be alright here?" Gloria asks. "Need anything?"
"A small carton of mango juice would be nice." Root murmurs as she shoves her face deeper into her pillow.
Root didn't even hear a reply as darkness engulfed her.
A/N: Hopefully this chapter doesn't feel too slow.
