A collection of one shots, snippets, drabbles and whatever's in between. Plot bunnies need their homes after all.
SirBearington's Private Study Room
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This will serve as the repository of some ideas that are just begging to be written down to see if someone would actually want to see it become a story of its own. This will also serve as a place for One Shot, ideas and maybe just discussion if anyone's up for it. Reserving this little post up here as a place to describe every fic that will be posted here. Hey, threadmark titles have their limitations.
Absolution: Prologue (High School DxD God SI)
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Prologue
Waking up to an unfamiliar bedroom was something he never expected to experience in his lifetime. Gone was the small, but comfortable, bed he slept on every night as he laid atop a large four poster bed in the middle of an equally unfamiliar room wearing nothing but a long white toga; though they were admittedly comfortable so he did not mind them overmuch. The room lit up as the light of dawn filtered in through the ornately decorated window on the left of the room. He had no idea where he was right now.
He looked around the room to look for clues on where he was and what happened last night, finding himself in a large room that would fit better in the Edwardian era rather than the modern time with all the exquisitely carved wooden furniture made of ebony along with the noticeable lack of anything vaguely electrical. There was neither a socket nor light bulb in this room. In fact, there was only a silver candlestick sitting atop the white bed stand beside his bed.
He wanted to get up and investigate but he was far too comfortable to do so. He felt like he was sleeping atop a cloud as he practically sunk into the bed he found himself in. The equally fluffy pillow where his head rested upon wasn't helping either. He decided that he wasn't going to waste this chance to sleep in as he tucked himself in and closed his eyes.
The next time his eyes opened, the room that greeted him was the very same room that he found himself in earlier. "So, that wasn't just some fever dream …" He said out loudly only to blink as he found his voice higher than normal. He sat up and looked around, wondering if there was someone else but there was no one but him.
"What the hell?" He asked once more only for his voice to remain this young boyish tone. Confusion soon gave way to shock as he bolted off the fluffiest bed he'd ever had the privilege of sleeping in to look for a mirror. He looked around, wondering where the bathroom was and found two sets of doors. One was a large double door while the other was a door by the side of his room.
He took the door by the side. Thankfully, despite the lack of electrical lighting, the room was well lit… from somewhere. He shook off that thought as he grabbed the edge of the mirror and looked. Long silken blond hair and bright blue eyes stared back at him. He would have had difficulty trying to figure out if he was a boy or a girl if not for the adam's apple bobbing up and down his throat. Still, despite waking up looking like a completely different person, it wasn't that which caught his attention. No, what caught his attention was the large golden halo atop his head.
He shakily reached up for the floating halo and grabbed it, yanking on it only to find that the thing was attached to his head through some unknown means as he pulled his own head along with it. "Note to self, do not yank the halo." He breathed out shakily as he pressed his forehead against the mirror. Thankfully, the halo seemed to phase through solid matter, but not his hands.
Did he die in his sleep? Was he an angel? What in heaven's name happened to him? He shove those thoughts to the back of his head for now as he decided to just do his morning routine and act as if this was normal. Eventually, he'd get over this… hopefully. He washed his face and started cleaning himself.
After doing his business, he exited the bathroom and muttered about his current situation, "I really wish there was someone that I could talk to right now so I can figure out my current situation. There isn't even a St. Peter to welcome me at the pearly gates. It's just boom, you're now in a strange room with a halo atop your head. Didn't even get to have a cool pair of wings or anything."
He was looking at his hands so he did not notice the person he bumped into before they were in his face while he walked back to the bed he'd found himself in. Blinking as he backed off pretty quickly and pulled himself free of the cloud of feathers he'd face planted into. There, in front of him, stood a woman with six pairs of large feathered wings upon her back and a golden halo atop her head, though the halo wasn't as ornate as the one he had on his head. The golden haired woman wore a functional maid outfit with a long skirt and equally long apron and looked too be busy fluffing up the pillow he used earlier.
"Oh, sorry about that. Let me just fold this blanket." the woman replied as she was too engrossed in fixing the bed that he messed up. "I swear, someone just had to sleep on this particular bed. They could have used any other bed but no, they had to use this one."
He winced as he chuckled nervously at that. "Sorry about that miss, the person who slept there would be me, but never mind that; I need your help. I think I might have died?" He replied as he scratched the back of his head, he really wasn't sure anymore.
"Well, you're not dead but you'll soon wish you were when my brother hears about this! You have a lot of explaining to do, mister! I don't care that you're just assigned here for the first time but sleeping on God's… bed." The woman replied as she finished fixing the bed and turned towards him with a righteously pissed expression in her face before trailing off as her eyes landed on him. He would have been left speechless with how beautiful the woman was if not for the fact that she froze in front of him. He became increasingly concerned by the fact that she looked like she was holding her breath and that angry look faded away, now looking like she saw a ghost
"Ummm, miss. Are you ok?" he asked as he waved his hand in front of her after she just froze. He snapped his fingers but there was no response and she still hasn't moved worried. Slowly, he poked her cheeks to try and get her to snap out of it.
The woman's eyes rolled up their sockets before she promptly collapsed and passed out from shock. He cursed as he quickly knelt down to check on her. "Miss? Miss! Come on, don't pass out on me now!" He shouted in panic. Thankfully, he didn't see her hit her head. He shook his head as he decided to lift her up to the bed and get her comfortable there so he could go search for help.
He hooked his arms beneath her and found that she was uncomfortably light. Either his new body was stronger than it looked or she needed a sandwich or three. Just as he was about to set her down on the bed, the large double door opened as a maid with five pairs of wings peeked out and asked, "Miss Gabriel, we finished cleaning the throne…room". The bespectacled woman trailed off as she saw the woman he was currently holding
"Call a doctor or something! She just collapsed and-" His request was cut off as the woman screamed and ran off. Fear gripped his own heart now as the sound of people outside did not seem friendly. He quickly set her down and started pacing around and started thinking of what he could do now.
He could barricade himself inside the bathroom but that would only delay the inevitable. He could barricade the room but that would only make things worse. He could stay but he wasn't sure if the angels, and he was pretty sure they were angels, were as friendly as they were depicted so the only choice of action he knew where he wouldn't die was to flee. He turned towards the window and nodded; he had a way out.
He walked up to the window and threw it open. He expected to see heaven and he was really expecting it to be beautiful but he really wasn't ready to actually see the heavenly kingdom above the sky. Large pillars of cumulonimbus clouds rose high up while white washed temples and buildings dotted the surface. Between the valleys of these mountain sized clouds were the highways where angels flew by without a care in the world. He blinked as a large castle floated close by, sitting atop a sizable cumulus cloud. It was so close that he could see children playing on the grounds around the castle. With the uniform the angelic children were wearing, it looked like it was a school. It didn't take long for one of the children to notice him and wave at him excitedly. He waved back weakly as he looked around dumbstruck at everything.
"Wow." He breathed out a whisper of surprise as he saw everything. It wasn't just the sight that amazed him but the cold crisp air blowing against his face. The smell of flowers filled the air while the sound of singing could be heard in the background. He was… at peace at the sight.
His sight seeing was disturbed, however, as new found instincts flared and screamed at him to turn around. His halo flared brightly as he spun around and reached out for the shaft of the spear aimed at his back. His heart thundered in his chest as he stared down the tip of a very sharp and dangerous spear made of light wielded by an equally pissed angel with six pairs of wings and he didn't come alone as two other angels came with him, armed with a sword and an actual shepherd's staff respectively.
His eyes shifted to the spear wielder who's look of anger quickly faded to a litany of other emotions. First came bewilderment as his eyes widened. Then came denial creeping into the beautiful man's face as his jaw hung open and his grip slackened on his spear. Finally, it morphed into that of immense sadness and relief as he let go of the spear and fell down on his knees. Tears flowed down the angel's face and before the reincarnation could even think of what to say, the angel threw himself at him and cried his eyes out.
"It's… ok? I forgive you?" He said in a bewildered tone but that only made the man cry all the harder as the two angels dropped their weapons as well before they threw themselves at him. He called out for help as he found himself buried under three angels only for the woman from earlier to wake up.
"Father!" She cried out as the reincarnated man felt her weight adding on top of the three. He panicked as he tried getting them off but they held onto him like he was going to disappear if they let go. Thankfully they let go before he passed out from the lack of breath, a very uncomfortable discovery he made when the edge of his vision darkened for a brief second beneath all four of them.
"Let's give father some space everyone. He must be confused right now." The angel who thrusted his spear spoke with a shaky yet authoritative tone as he pulled away from him reluctantly and wiped the tears of his eyes. Yes, he was very confused right now alright.
"It's just… father's back!" Cried out the woman as she sobbed openly, only confusing him further. Father? Did he lose his memory as well? That didn't make any sense as he clearly remembered his life before this. He even remembered the meal he made yesterday. Still, for a brief second, he wanted to reach out and pat the woman's head but he held back as that would be highly inappropriate since he didn't even know her name.
"Father? You must be confusing me with someone else. I just woke up not knowing how I got here." He replied honestly. He must look like someone these angels knew because he'd remember fathering four angels though something niggled at the back of his head that they were familiar, that he knew them.
"Oh no, it happened again." The sword wielder replied with a worried tone. 'What happened again?' The reincarnated man asked himself as he stood there frozen in fear and disorientation at the situation he found himself in. With those words uttered, the four angels burst into action as the reincarnated man found himself lifted up above the head of the spear wielder.
"Wait! Put me down!" He protested and flailed around but the spear wielders had him firmly in his grip as he carried him out of the room. He did not like being carried around like a sack of potatoes but he was far too shocked to pry himself off the man.
"Uriel! Grab Father's Diary!" The spear wielder commanded and the sword wielder saluted as he ran off to the foot of the bed where a chest was and started rifling through its contents trying to find this diary that they spoke of.
"Where the hell are you taking me!" He shouted, trying to get their attention but they ignored him as he found himself carried off to God knows where. The long hallway outside was just as richly decorated as the room he found himself in.
Exquisitely carved statues lined the hall while masterfully painted scenes of various dragons, monsters and the sexiest devils he'd ever seen being vanquished by a heavenly host. What was more shocking was the all too familiar face in all these paintings. It was the same face he saw in the mirror. "Is that me?!" He shouted in confusion.
"It's worse than I thought." The staff wielder muttered as he stomped ahead as he cleared the way. Uniformed angels of various wings numbers jumped out of the way as the look of awe and worship dawned on their faces. All the reincarnated man could do was look around in bewilderment.
"Gabriel, cancel everything! Father's having one of his episodes again. He needs our help remembering things. I'm sure the church will understand once Father's back to his old self." The spear wielder pointed at the woman who saluted.
"I'll call everyone as well Michael! Metatron will be extremely happy!" The woman replied happily with a salute before she barked, commanding the various maids and servants back to their task as she flew off to a branching corridor.
"Don't worry father, we'll get this all sorted out. We won't fail you again. Raphael, call the kitchen. Tell them to prepare Father's favorite meal." The now identified Michael said as the staff wielder nodded before flying off. At this point, the reincarnated man gave up and just allowed himself to be taken.
"Can you at least tell me why you're calling me father?" He asked as he sagged on Michaels shoulder while they ascended a flight of stairs. As to why they weren't flying, he did not know but he noticed the other angels walking up the stairs as if they were carrying a great work.
"You're our Father of course. You are the Most High. You are Adonia. You are YHWH." Michael replied as they finally got to the top. It was a large circular room filled with various angels attending to all sorts of tasks. It wouldn't be out of place of a busy government office except for the large pearly gates in the back.
All the angels stood in attention as they entered. "I am who now?!" He shouted as the angels around him stared at him in awe.
"Oh father, you always had a fun sense of humor." Michael laughed out as he marched straight to the door and opened it. A cold blast of air escaped from the room behind the door as he beheld a relatively spartan room. Unlike the rest of the building, it was just a simple throne atop a monolithic stepped platform made of marble and surrounding it was a tiered ring of seats along with various carved columns where torches could be placed. The room was ornate yes, but there hung an air of disrepair and disuse. Cracks spread from the throne while some of the columns were broken. Cauldrons sat atop platforms, unlit and unused from millenia. It was also painfully empty, without a living soul in sight.
Michaels steps echoed inside the empty room as he marched atop stairs. For some reason, The reincarnated man could feel a sense of familiarity as he stared at the chair. It beckoned to him, like an old friend just waiting all this time. He remained silent as he was carried up the steps and there at the top of it, the very top of heaven as he would soon find out as the starry sky stretched across the sky while the city atop the clouds stretched as far as the sky could, he was promptly deposited into the empty seat.
At first, he was confused as he sat on the deceptively comfortable seat, not knowing why he was placed there... until it hit. A flood of memories filled his head, instincts flooding him as an all mighty headache formed inside his skull. The room was drowned out by a loud hum as well as a veritable flood of golden light as his halo started to sing with power. For the very first time in his life, he felt his eyes open and there he beheld eternity and it stared back with a tired smile.
"It's your turn now. Good luck" A voice whispered into his ears as the presence in the throne faded to nothingness. He was left panting and breathless as his fingers gripped the side of his throne. Michael was knelt before him while a heavenly host of angels assembled around his throne. Cracks no longer marred the beauty of the room as golden veins spread from his seat. Pillars miraculously repaired themselves as phantasmal light flickered and burned in the cauldrons surrounding his throne.
"I… am God?" he whispered as he stared ahead sightlessly, yet he was peering into the world below with the unlimited sensations of omniscience.
The Archangel smiled as a lone tear flowed down his cheek. "It's good to have you back, father." He replied as the host cheered and praised him.
There atop the world, he exuded power yet he felt nothing but dread inside. 'I'm now responsible for the literal fate of billions. God help me now.' He thought to himself before the prayer echoed in his ears as if to mock him. He not so gently knocked his fist against the back of his throne at that.
Waking up to an unfamiliar bedroom was something he never expected to experience in his lifetime. Gone was the small, but comfortable, bed he slept on every night as he laid atop a large four poster bed in the middle of an equally unfamiliar room wearing nothing but a long white toga; though they were admittedly comfortable so he did not mind them overmuch. The room lit up as the light of dawn filtered in through the ornately decorated window on the left of the room. He had no idea where he was right now.
He looked around the room to look for clues on where he was and what happened last night, finding himself in a large room that would fit better in the Edwardian era rather than the modern time with all the exquisitely carved wooden furniture made of ebony along with the noticeable lack of anything vaguely electrical. There was neither a socket nor light bulb in this room. In fact, there was only a silver candlestick sitting atop the white bed stand beside his bed.
He wanted to get up and investigate but he was far too comfortable to do so. He felt like he was sleeping atop a cloud as he practically sunk into the bed he found himself in. The equally fluffy pillow where his head rested upon wasn't helping either. He decided that he wasn't going to waste this chance to sleep in as he tucked himself in and closed his eyes.
The next time his eyes opened, the room that greeted him was the very same room that he found himself in earlier. "So, that wasn't just some fever dream …" He said out loudly only to blink as he found his voice higher than normal. He sat up and looked around, wondering if there was someone else but there was no one but him.
"What the hell?" He asked once more only for his voice to remain this young boyish tone. Confusion soon gave way to shock as he bolted off the fluffiest bed he'd ever had the privilege of sleeping in to look for a mirror. He looked around, wondering where the bathroom was and found two sets of doors. One was a large double door while the other was a door by the side of his room.
He took the door by the side. Thankfully, despite the lack of electrical lighting, the room was well lit… from somewhere. He shook off that thought as he grabbed the edge of the mirror and looked. Long silken blond hair and bright blue eyes stared back at him. He would have had difficulty trying to figure out if he was a boy or a girl if not for the adam's apple bobbing up and down his throat. Still, despite waking up looking like a completely different person, it wasn't that which caught his attention. No, what caught his attention was the large golden halo atop his head.
He shakily reached up for the floating halo and grabbed it, yanking on it only to find that the thing was attached to his head through some unknown means as he pulled his own head along with it. "Note to self, do not yank the halo." He breathed out shakily as he pressed his forehead against the mirror. Thankfully, the halo seemed to phase through solid matter, but not his hands.
Did he die in his sleep? Was he an angel? What in heaven's name happened to him? He shove those thoughts to the back of his head for now as he decided to just do his morning routine and act as if this was normal. Eventually, he'd get over this… hopefully. He washed his face and started cleaning himself.
After doing his business, he exited the bathroom and muttered about his current situation, "I really wish there was someone that I could talk to right now so I can figure out my current situation. There isn't even a St. Peter to welcome me at the pearly gates. It's just boom, you're now in a strange room with a halo atop your head. Didn't even get to have a cool pair of wings or anything."
He was looking at his hands so he did not notice the person he bumped into before they were in his face while he walked back to the bed he'd found himself in. Blinking as he backed off pretty quickly and pulled himself free of the cloud of feathers he'd face planted into. There, in front of him, stood a woman with six pairs of large feathered wings upon her back and a golden halo atop her head, though the halo wasn't as ornate as the one he had on his head. The golden haired woman wore a functional maid outfit with a long skirt and equally long apron and looked too be busy fluffing up the pillow he used earlier.
"Oh, sorry about that. Let me just fold this blanket." the woman replied as she was too engrossed in fixing the bed that he messed up. "I swear, someone just had to sleep on this particular bed. They could have used any other bed but no, they had to use this one."
He winced as he chuckled nervously at that. "Sorry about that miss, the person who slept there would be me, but never mind that; I need your help. I think I might have died?" He replied as he scratched the back of his head, he really wasn't sure anymore.
"Well, you're not dead but you'll soon wish you were when my brother hears about this! You have a lot of explaining to do, mister! I don't care that you're just assigned here for the first time but sleeping on God's… bed." The woman replied as she finished fixing the bed and turned towards him with a righteously pissed expression in her face before trailing off as her eyes landed on him. He would have been left speechless with how beautiful the woman was if not for the fact that she froze in front of him. He became increasingly concerned by the fact that she looked like she was holding her breath and that angry look faded away, now looking like she saw a ghost
"Ummm, miss. Are you ok?" he asked as he waved his hand in front of her after she just froze. He snapped his fingers but there was no response and she still hasn't moved worried. Slowly, he poked her cheeks to try and get her to snap out of it.
The woman's eyes rolled up their sockets before she promptly collapsed and passed out from shock. He cursed as he quickly knelt down to check on her. "Miss? Miss! Come on, don't pass out on me now!" He shouted in panic. Thankfully, he didn't see her hit her head. He shook his head as he decided to lift her up to the bed and get her comfortable there so he could go search for help.
He hooked his arms beneath her and found that she was uncomfortably light. Either his new body was stronger than it looked or she needed a sandwich or three. Just as he was about to set her down on the bed, the large double door opened as a maid with five pairs of wings peeked out and asked, "Miss Gabriel, we finished cleaning the throne…room". The bespectacled woman trailed off as she saw the woman he was currently holding
"Call a doctor or something! She just collapsed and-" His request was cut off as the woman screamed and ran off. Fear gripped his own heart now as the sound of people outside did not seem friendly. He quickly set her down and started pacing around and started thinking of what he could do now.
He could barricade himself inside the bathroom but that would only delay the inevitable. He could barricade the room but that would only make things worse. He could stay but he wasn't sure if the angels, and he was pretty sure they were angels, were as friendly as they were depicted so the only choice of action he knew where he wouldn't die was to flee. He turned towards the window and nodded; he had a way out.
He walked up to the window and threw it open. He expected to see heaven and he was really expecting it to be beautiful but he really wasn't ready to actually see the heavenly kingdom above the sky. Large pillars of cumulonimbus clouds rose high up while white washed temples and buildings dotted the surface. Between the valleys of these mountain sized clouds were the highways where angels flew by without a care in the world. He blinked as a large castle floated close by, sitting atop a sizable cumulus cloud. It was so close that he could see children playing on the grounds around the castle. With the uniform the angelic children were wearing, it looked like it was a school. It didn't take long for one of the children to notice him and wave at him excitedly. He waved back weakly as he looked around dumbstruck at everything.
"Wow." He breathed out a whisper of surprise as he saw everything. It wasn't just the sight that amazed him but the cold crisp air blowing against his face. The smell of flowers filled the air while the sound of singing could be heard in the background. He was… at peace at the sight.
His sight seeing was disturbed, however, as new found instincts flared and screamed at him to turn around. His halo flared brightly as he spun around and reached out for the shaft of the spear aimed at his back. His heart thundered in his chest as he stared down the tip of a very sharp and dangerous spear made of light wielded by an equally pissed angel with six pairs of wings and he didn't come alone as two other angels came with him, armed with a sword and an actual shepherd's staff respectively.
His eyes shifted to the spear wielder who's look of anger quickly faded to a litany of other emotions. First came bewilderment as his eyes widened. Then came denial creeping into the beautiful man's face as his jaw hung open and his grip slackened on his spear. Finally, it morphed into that of immense sadness and relief as he let go of the spear and fell down on his knees. Tears flowed down the angel's face and before the reincarnation could even think of what to say, the angel threw himself at him and cried his eyes out.
"It's… ok? I forgive you?" He said in a bewildered tone but that only made the man cry all the harder as the two angels dropped their weapons as well before they threw themselves at him. He called out for help as he found himself buried under three angels only for the woman from earlier to wake up.
"Father!" She cried out as the reincarnated man felt her weight adding on top of the three. He panicked as he tried getting them off but they held onto him like he was going to disappear if they let go. Thankfully they let go before he passed out from the lack of breath, a very uncomfortable discovery he made when the edge of his vision darkened for a brief second beneath all four of them.
"Let's give father some space everyone. He must be confused right now." The angel who thrusted his spear spoke with a shaky yet authoritative tone as he pulled away from him reluctantly and wiped the tears of his eyes. Yes, he was very confused right now alright.
"It's just… father's back!" Cried out the woman as she sobbed openly, only confusing him further. Father? Did he lose his memory as well? That didn't make any sense as he clearly remembered his life before this. He even remembered the meal he made yesterday. Still, for a brief second, he wanted to reach out and pat the woman's head but he held back as that would be highly inappropriate since he didn't even know her name.
"Father? You must be confusing me with someone else. I just woke up not knowing how I got here." He replied honestly. He must look like someone these angels knew because he'd remember fathering four angels though something niggled at the back of his head that they were familiar, that he knew them.
"Oh no, it happened again." The sword wielder replied with a worried tone. 'What happened again?' The reincarnated man asked himself as he stood there frozen in fear and disorientation at the situation he found himself in. With those words uttered, the four angels burst into action as the reincarnated man found himself lifted up above the head of the spear wielder.
"Wait! Put me down!" He protested and flailed around but the spear wielders had him firmly in his grip as he carried him out of the room. He did not like being carried around like a sack of potatoes but he was far too shocked to pry himself off the man.
"Uriel! Grab Father's Diary!" The spear wielder commanded and the sword wielder saluted as he ran off to the foot of the bed where a chest was and started rifling through its contents trying to find this diary that they spoke of.
"Where the hell are you taking me!" He shouted, trying to get their attention but they ignored him as he found himself carried off to God knows where. The long hallway outside was just as richly decorated as the room he found himself in.
Exquisitely carved statues lined the hall while masterfully painted scenes of various dragons, monsters and the sexiest devils he'd ever seen being vanquished by a heavenly host. What was more shocking was the all too familiar face in all these paintings. It was the same face he saw in the mirror. "Is that me?!" He shouted in confusion.
"It's worse than I thought." The staff wielder muttered as he stomped ahead as he cleared the way. Uniformed angels of various wings numbers jumped out of the way as the look of awe and worship dawned on their faces. All the reincarnated man could do was look around in bewilderment.
"Gabriel, cancel everything! Father's having one of his episodes again. He needs our help remembering things. I'm sure the church will understand once Father's back to his old self." The spear wielder pointed at the woman who saluted.
"I'll call everyone as well Michael! Metatron will be extremely happy!" The woman replied happily with a salute before she barked, commanding the various maids and servants back to their task as she flew off to a branching corridor.
"Don't worry father, we'll get this all sorted out. We won't fail you again. Raphael, call the kitchen. Tell them to prepare Father's favorite meal." The now identified Michael said as the staff wielder nodded before flying off. At this point, the reincarnated man gave up and just allowed himself to be taken.
"Can you at least tell me why you're calling me father?" He asked as he sagged on Michaels shoulder while they ascended a flight of stairs. As to why they weren't flying, he did not know but he noticed the other angels walking up the stairs as if they were carrying a great work.
"You're our Father of course. You are the Most High. You are Adonia. You are YHWH." Michael replied as they finally got to the top. It was a large circular room filled with various angels attending to all sorts of tasks. It wouldn't be out of place of a busy government office except for the large pearly gates in the back.
All the angels stood in attention as they entered. "I am who now?!" He shouted as the angels around him stared at him in awe.
"Oh father, you always had a fun sense of humor." Michael laughed out as he marched straight to the door and opened it. A cold blast of air escaped from the room behind the door as he beheld a relatively spartan room. Unlike the rest of the building, it was just a simple throne atop a monolithic stepped platform made of marble and surrounding it was a tiered ring of seats along with various carved columns where torches could be placed. The room was ornate yes, but there hung an air of disrepair and disuse. Cracks spread from the throne while some of the columns were broken. Cauldrons sat atop platforms, unlit and unused from millenia. It was also painfully empty, without a living soul in sight.
Michaels steps echoed inside the empty room as he marched atop stairs. For some reason, The reincarnated man could feel a sense of familiarity as he stared at the chair. It beckoned to him, like an old friend just waiting all this time. He remained silent as he was carried up the steps and there at the top of it, the very top of heaven as he would soon find out as the starry sky stretched across the sky while the city atop the clouds stretched as far as the sky could, he was promptly deposited into the empty seat.
At first, he was confused as he sat on the deceptively comfortable seat, not knowing why he was placed there... until it hit. A flood of memories filled his head, instincts flooding him as an all mighty headache formed inside his skull. The room was drowned out by a loud hum as well as a veritable flood of golden light as his halo started to sing with power. For the very first time in his life, he felt his eyes open and there he beheld eternity and it stared back with a tired smile.
"It's your turn now. Good luck" A voice whispered into his ears as the presence in the throne faded to nothingness. He was left panting and breathless as his fingers gripped the side of his throne. Michael was knelt before him while a heavenly host of angels assembled around his throne. Cracks no longer marred the beauty of the room as golden veins spread from his seat. Pillars miraculously repaired themselves as phantasmal light flickered and burned in the cauldrons surrounding his throne.
"I… am God?" he whispered as he stared ahead sightlessly, yet he was peering into the world below with the unlimited sensations of omniscience.
The Archangel smiled as a lone tear flowed down his cheek. "It's good to have you back, father." He replied as the host cheered and praised him.
There atop the world, he exuded power yet he felt nothing but dread inside. 'I'm now responsible for the literal fate of billions. God help me now.' He thought to himself before the prayer echoed in his ears as if to mock him. He not so gently knocked his fist against the back of his throne at that.
- Location
- North America
the idea of God being a body with rotating souls waiting to retire for the next soul is funny.
OH SHIT GOD DIED!
no he didn't he just lost his memories again. he'll be back in a century or 5
OH SHIT GOD DIED!
no he didn't he just lost his memories again. he'll be back in a century or 5
Isiri Pudireach
Predictive text can go duck itself
That feeling when the angels think God has Dementia, when its really Dimensional Soul Roulette.
A Warboss's Retirment Plan: Prologue
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Prologue
He looked down upon the crude, kitbashed, holographic display showing a thousand star systems highlighted in green. There seated upon a comfortable throne, he inspected his holdings and found the borders caved. Before him was the map of the entirety of his empire and right at its border highlighted in gold and denoted with the double headed aquila was the enemy at the gates. In one lifetime, he would have rooted for the men under the aquila but today was a different existence, for he was no longer a man and this was an age where there was only war.
"Bozz, the beakie's fleet has just arrived at the edge of the system anz oh boy there'z a lot of them 'ere." One of his men said, a gigantic ork wearing minimal armor, in passable high gothic as he pointed at the spots of golden light streaking straight for the heart of his empire.
He hummed for a bit as he looked at the display before his attention was caught by a meek little human trying to keep her head low as she pushed a large cart containing large tankards of beer. She was one of the human servants that he saved from the slaughter. It was either the frying pan or this; he might no longer be human but he still had some humanity left. He grabbed one as the others jostled for who to get, growling warningly if one of his nobs looked like he was getting a bit hungry.
With his thirst sated, he reached towards the display and gestured for it to zoom in and on each light he'd see the symbol of the legion they were affiliated with. There amongst the ships were the expected symbols of the Omega, a slitted red eye, and a red lightning bolt; but there were those bearing a stylized black first along with a winged eagles claw. They were an unexpected addition to this decapitation strike. He started counting at the green dots and found that his fleet was outnumbered three to one.
"Well color me surprised. They're sending in five of them here? Ha, thought they'd only send in three." He barked out a laugh as he gently placed his beer down on the table before him. It was concerning yes but he couldn't help but smile along with the boys. It was going to be a good fight, he could feel it in his bones.
"So boss, what do we do?" Asked his right hand ork as the stooped weird boy held on his banner. His eyes crackled with green energy.
"We bleed them out. Our fleet will not last long against those 5. Crack open the vaults to the nice shootas and big choppas." He responded as he got off his seat, stretching a bit, and worked on the kinks on his shoulder. He was getting restless and the prospect of a fight was making it worse. "Arm everyone, even the gretchen. Have them crew the larger weapons."
"The one you had Gearhead and his crew make all year long?" another Nob asked with glee in his beady little eyes.
"That vault." He replied with a widened green as he reached for his helm. The stylized orkoid face looking back at him, grinning back at him as if hungry for battle. Well, it certainly wouldn't be hungry for long with the awaiting blood bath. "Abandon the cities, let them take it. We're going to the fortresses." He ordered as he placed his helmet on. It might impede his vision but it was better than having no head at all.
"And miss out on the fightin when they start droppin?" A disgruntled nob wearing power grumbled out. The room became deadly quiet as Magsnik stared at the nob who looked around nervously. His grip tightened at the handle of his adamantine hammer. Flipping his maul so that the spiked end was facing forwards, he reached out with his weapon and pulled the Nob by digging the spike on his armor.
His muscle bulged at the effort of dragging the Ork down but he had to send a message as he growled at his face slowly. "We're not missing out on the fighting. We're just taking the fight where it's going to be the most brutal. Down in the tunnels, there's no cover." he explained to him in pain-staking detail.
He could see the gears grinding in the orks head as he looked crossed eyes down on his tusk before a smile stretched across his face. "Yes boss, I get it now! That's why you is the boss! Yur definitely one of 'dem brain boyz! " He nodded eagerly as he grinned at him. He had to suppress a groan of disappointment as he pulled his hammer off the orks armor. Sometimes, he wondered if this was really worth it.
"Any objections?" He grounded out, waiting for any to make a move but the shakes of their heads and their averted gaze told him their answers. "Then what's with the thumb fiddling here? Get up you lot, the turrets in the mountain aren't going to arm themselves!" He shouted as he slammed the butt of his maul down on the floor.
That spurred them into action as they quickly filtered out of the room. He looked down on them as they passed by him and waited for them to get out before he could give his final orders. Once they were gone, he pointed at the lone servant left in the room. "You, come here," he ordered, making the girl squeak as walked towards him. "Get every servant to safety. Evacuate the palace. Things are going to get ugly." He said as he pulled out a small stubber from one of his pouches and gave it to her as a symbol of her authority. The girl nodded as she took the gun and ran off.
Fiddling with knobs on his belt, he finally got the setting right and smashed the button over the buckle and he was tossed in the immaterium. The wailing sea of souls rejected his orkiness as he shot through it, punching anyone that got too close, before he felt the large concentration of orks nearby and he slammed the button again to which he found himself deposited on the train station where orks of all sizes were boarding their transport. With the sky burning as lances of fire streaked across the heaven, it wouldn't take long before they came down to the ground.
-x-x-x-
He expected this, he'd been preparing for this but when the news came, he still felt he wasn't ready. "Bozz Magsnik! Bozz Magsnik! The Beakies are 'ere! They be droppin like you said they would!" Shouted an ork messenger as he burst into the room, disturbing him from his planning with the boys. He straightened up as he stared at the orks excited face as the cave he was in shooked. The plasteel reinforced ferrocrete pillars the mountain complex cracked despite how they were wider than he was tall and he towered over the other green skinned monsters inside this room.
"Gitzappa, prepare the Weirdboyz." He ordered as he walked towards the nearby window to the battlefield. He was currently inside a bunker where his men could shoot the enemy with impunity. He could be in those underground bunkers but he needed to see things with his own eyes. Currently, some of his own nobs were using the mounted shoota's to spray and pray to the aircraft buzzing by.
Protected by several feet of reinforced ferrocrete, he overlooked the war torn from one of the vantage points of his mountain fortress as the battle raged on from down below. Millions of soldiers of the Imperialis Auxilia assaulted them from all sides, marching along their Leman Russ and supported by their basilisk as they climbed up the slopes of the mountain. The very skies burned as the massive drop ships of the Legio Titanicus and the shells of Nova cannons rained from above. The ground itself trembled as thousands of astartes launched themselves at his defenses but he did not fret for this is exactly what he wanted.
Along with the dropships came the burning hulks of both his own and imperial warships falling from the sky, burning and crushing both humans and orks alike. The sky was lit up as his fortresses' anti air batteries spewed a storm of lead. Men and Astartes alike fell as his forces ambushed them in close quarter combat as these soldiers were forced to fight in the claustrophobic trenches and tunnels dotting his mountain fortress.
"It's almost like Iwo Jima." he chuckled out as he watched with a feral grin on his ugly mug. With five legions barreling straight for his fortress world, he knew the fight would be a tough one. It could be won, he just needed to last longer than they could. A decapitation strike was good for his kind but that could lead to them being trapped behind enemy lines.
"Wuzzat bozz?" One of his Nobz asked as the large ork scratched his head. He suppressed a groan at that. He sometimes wished he had someone to talk to that doesn't require him punching and beating someone but alas, he was an ork. Any talk will eventually devolve into a fight or a challenge.
"Nevermind, just get ready to evacuate to the next fortress. We're taking this fight elsewhere. For now though." he turned to his standard bearer who came with the weirdboyz as instructed. They twitched and mumbled as they hooked to tha banner. The baleful green glow in the eyes of the skull atop the banner was a good sign.
He walked up to the banner and grabbed hold of it. Immediately, power flowed through his veins. Green lightning danced across his skin and down his hammer. They lashed out, singing and striking randomly until he started to exert his might. The lightning turned inward, arching around the banner and his weapon. With this power contained in hand, he raised his hammer and pointed at one of the titans belonging to the Colegio Mortis. Its grizzly form is covered with the skulls of both orks, xenos, and humans alike as it waded around the battlefield. He found a target and nothing in the battlefield right now was more worth his attention as the giant started digging through the tunnels at the side of the mountain.
He breathed in and started pulling at the force of the horde below, drawing at the power permeating every orkoid in this very planet. His lungs filled with not just air but power as the air around him shimmer. Pressure quickly built up as his body was forced to contain the power of the horde, channeled to him by the screaming and roaring weirdboyz around him. His head feeling like it was going to burst, and indeed some of the weirdboyz around him had their heads pop, yet his hammer helped him channel it, drawing it away from his body and preventing it from building up too much. He held on to this raw untapped force until he couldn't anymore.
Thrusting his hammer out, He bellowed out, letting his roar carry out and directing the psychic energy of a billion orcs ark out and hit the Titan squarely on the chest. A million tons of steel was lifted off its feet and sent back tumbling back. It's colossal form crashing against the hard ground, crushing its allies and his own forces as green smoke plumed from its chest. He laughed out maniacally as he felt his blood sing while the force of the WAAAGH bled off.
The weirdboyz around him were left twitching and drooling after being made to channel that much energy. He pulled at his banner, tearing the connection tethering it to them as he handed it back to his standard bearer. He was in no position to talk about toughing it out as his own mind felt like it was being apart. Only his superior constitution as a warboss allowed him to keep going.
With that display of power, his position would soon be focused upon. He needed to get out here soon else he'd be eating Nova Shells as breakfast. He turned around to see his Nobs cheering and shouting as they raised their shoota's and choopa's. "What the hell did I just say? Go on you lot! Scram!" He shouted as he backhanded the nob he commanded earlier with his hammer. A good knock on the head was the quickest way to send his orders across as they scrambled to their feet and ran off.
"I swear these idiots…" he growled out as he shook his head and went to follow them. This mountain was a bust and they'd soon overwhelm it. The next nearest mountain was a thousand miles away and he fully expected one idiot to have the "bright idea" of leaving him behind. Running there would be a pain especially in the cramped tunnels and he did not like the prospect of traveling that far through the warp.
Just as he was about to leave this room, he heard shouting from outside along with the tell tale explosions of a bolter exploding as it hit the Plasteel reinforced ferrocrete of his bunker as well as retaliatory fire from his own men. What peeked his ears were not the gun fire of heavy bolters but the roar of chainswords and the crackling of some energy weapons. He immediately hit his panic button and the alarm claxons rang out and bathed the room in a red light.
The grin on his face turned feral as he burst out of the room and came face to face with the power armor clad form of a Terminator. He had to give credit where it was due as the man immediately aimed his heavy bolter at his head and sprayed lead right at his face. Unfortunately for the man, he was currently wearing a helmet and it pinged off his head uselessly.
He swung his hammer and he savored the sound and feeling of the warriors armor crumpling as he was launched to the wall. The hallway he walked into was large enough to allow a small Gargant to walk around and here was a sizable contingent of white armor clad Astartes led by an absolutely gigantic superhuman wielding a power claw on one hand and a maul on the other. The bald head, the wolf pelt and that singular eye upon his chest piece told him who he was facing.
"Ahhh, the infamous Horus Lupercal of the Luna Wolves." He shouted in greeting as he raised his hand and fired at the Primarch with the modified Stormbolter strapped on his left arm.
He never saw such bullshit as the man swiped his claw and vaporized his shots even when he was clearly surprised. "High Gothic?" The superhuman shouted in surprise as Magsnik was forced to deal with more Terminators. He blocked their swords, letting their tooth blade scratch his adamantine hammer before he pushed them away and they were blasted by his standard bearer's lightning.
"It's a fucking pain to learn I swear, much less teaching to my nobs!" He shouted as he headed straight for the primarch who was clearly intent on killing him. He swiped his hammer, hitting and smashing everyone on his way as bloodlust tinted his vision green. He was going to smash that stupid smile spreading across the mans face.
The primarch laughed as he charged forward, passing by surprised Nobs and Terminators alike, and shouted in response "Hah! I never expected the day that I'd agree with an Ork of all things."
They clashed and at first Horus proved to be the better fighter as he forced him back. He was far faster, more nimble even, and he made great use of it to get under his strikes. Magsnik was missing but soon he found his footing when he started bodying the primarch and using his bigger size and thicker armor. The warsmaster's strikes might dig deeper into his flesh but he was tougher. He bullied the Primarch back as the fighting and claxons attracted every ork in the vicinity.
Magsnik pulled back to take a breather as feral gretchins and snotlings threw themselves at the Primarch as they burst out of the air vents from above. The little creatures proved their worth by showing the son of the emperor why he must always wear a helmet as he was bathed in blood and was blinded by it. The warboss didn't waste his time as he started pelting his enemy with bolter fire for distraction.
"Enough of this!" Roared the primarch as he threw off the last gretchin only to find that he and his children were surrounded by Orks of all sizes. Magsnik laughed out loudly as the ground started to shake and a pair of glowing green eyes appeared from behind Magsnik and Horus.
"I concur." Magsnik agreed as he started to pull at the WAAAGH and channeled it in his hammer just as a pair of small Stomaps appeared from the tunnel. Surrounded on all sides and with no way out, Magsnik roared as he sent his men to the brave and valiant men.
He would soon see Horus mobbed by a green tide giving Magsnik time to fiddle with his teleporter. Horus was fighting like a trapped squig as he sliced through orks left and right but that left him open as Magsnik slammed his hands on the big red button and appeared several feet above the Primarch. With the hammer raised up high, he fell down like a big damn Rok and slammed his hammer right on the Primarchs shoulder. The man feel down from the grievous injury and he was quickly beset by furious and suicidal marines yet it was for naught as their leader was rendered unconscious from the shock leaving them without direction.
He stood atop a pile of Marines as he stared down at the unconscious form of the primarch. "You will make for a useful bargaining tool." He chuckled out as he reached down and picked the Warmaster up for he had a plan, he always had a plan.
With Horus stripped of armor and dragged in chains, Magsnik strolled into battle with his banner attached to his back. The moment he stepped out of his fortress door with the Warmaster in hand, the battlefield seemed to come to a stop as his men turned to him and cheered while the Astarte's morale dropped as they faltered in their charge. There in front of him was the greatest general of the imperium in chains and collared like a common criminal.
"Soldiers of the Imperium!" He called out, letting his voice ring out across the battlefield. "Stand down and your Warmaster might live longer!'' He demanded as he kicked the battered form of the primarch. His right shoulder was a mess but it was a pragmatic choice on his part. He would not live a day longer if Horus died now. With his hammer resting on his shoulder and his banner fluttering in the wind, he looked at the battlefield as it grinded to a halt.
"Boyz, let the Beakies have time to think." He added with a cruel laugh, hamming up his action to get the attention of his men. Thankfully, the Orks held back and fell back to their defensive position. Any Ork smart enough to disobey were dispatched by the wall of guns called his mountain fortress.
That quickly put a damper on the action as he effectively forced a ceasefire down the invaders throats. Combat quickly grinded to a halt as he felt every gun on the enemy's side trained their way towards him. He feared them not for he had someone in between them and his fleshy body. Out from the enemy line stepped a heavily armored astartes clad in artisanal purple armor with the symbol of the imperium proudly used as his own symbol.
"What's stopping us from turning your head into paste, Ork?" The Phoenician asked as he could practically feel the hundreds of red dots appearing on the forehead of his armor. The venom and hate dripping from those words was almost palpable and he reveled in it.
"I'm glad you asked." He replied as he raised his clenched fist and the collar on Horus's neck started to blink. "Wanna fuck around and find out, Phoenician?" He asked. The things you could do with simple and dirt cheap blinking lights was just amusing. One misstep however and he died.
"Why?" called out another voice, this time he couldn't discern where it was but the dry and unamused yet intrigued voice hinted him on who it was.
"Asking for my demands, Praetorian? That would be simple really. Leave." He demanded and even his own men were taken aback. Him, the warboss letting the enemy go? It was the most unorky of demands and no ork in their right mind would ask for a thing. Good thing he wasn't fully orky inside his head. "Isn't a temporary white peace more appealing for both of our sides than what we have now?" He asked.
This was what he wanted. Ullanor in the long run was fucked and there was no prospect of him ever touching his retirement plan if this battle was to continue. He needed the imperium off his back long enough for the Heresy to kick off. With him having one of the primarchs, he might just be able to force that. Everything was going according to his plans until things didn't.
For a brief second, he felt an oppressive pressure descend on the battlefield. He felt four pairs of eyes settle on him until they faded away as a crushing, all encompassing feeling fell upon the battlefield. The battlefield was bathed in golden light before HE arrived.
Clad in golden armor and wielding a flaming sword, the master of mankind arrived in the battle. For a brief moment, Magsnik's eyes met those terrible golden eyes and his spirit started to scream. He felt his feet step backward as overwhelming fear as his custodes started to appear though the very same portal He appeared from. For the first time in his new life, he once more felt fear. Instinct and his conscious mind warred inside him as he felt his throat lock up, his mouth hanging open as the man before him stepped forward with his ten thousand in his back.
All his plans came crashing down as the one person he wished to never personally meet was forced into battle. He knew deep in his bones that this hair brained scheme of his was the cause and now it was going to be a fight for a lifetime. He could already hear the twins roaring in his ears, demanding him to move forward but he couldn't and so he did what any sane person in this insane galaxy would do given his situation.
"Fuck this! I'm out!" He shouted as he tossed the rock he had been holding on the ground before grabbing the banner on his back and thrusting it the the nearest ork. With little to no regards to his own safety, he overloaded his belt by breaking the button and teleported out of the situation. He was forced into the warp screaming and kicking as he was pulled in every which direction. The moment he fled, he felt the twins screaming at him while the sea of souls heaved and roiled. With no way to control where he would land, he floated around blind to the eternities. He swung his hammer around, using what meager energy was left in him to ward off the nipping creatures in the dark for untold ages until it ended as soon as it began.
He found himself crashing and tumbling in a pile of broken metal and rocks. He laid their broken and defeated yet whole and sane. "It actually worked…" He whispered out as he started laughing. He turned to his back and there he beheld a sky filled with stars and around him were the broken remains of hundreds if not thousands of ships.
He did not know where he was and he could not feel the WAAAGH anywhere. He was lost out in space in some unknown space hulk and it suited him just fine. He took in a deep breath and found that the air was thin but that was fine, he was an ork after all. He tried to get up but he found himself weakened, severely so as the armor he wore and the weapon he wielded felt like its actual weight. The WAAAGH left him just as he had left his WAAAGH.
"This… is unexpected but I can work with this." He declared. He was tired and drained but he was very much still alive. Even if his limbs weren't so strong anymore, he now had time aplenty to spend in this little corner of the galaxy, he found a place where war has yet to reach. He was not really cut out for all this war stuff anyways, might as well retire.
"My name is Magsnik Kogchewa and I'm officially retired." He called out to no one as he forced himself up. With his heavy maul in hand, he started to walk in search of a place to make a house in this strange space hulk with its atmosphere and strange heavy gravity.
"This place isn't exactly bad." He declared as his foot found actual silicate rock. Maybe he could actually make this work but he really needed to find a spot to settle down first as his armor needed to be pulled off. A good dark cave would be nice to settle in, somewhere cool, damp and, most importantly of all, hidden away from the prying eyes up in the sky. He was in a space hulk so a trip to the warp from time to time wouldn't be too out of the question. He also needed it to contain plenty of rock to smash and make soil using his blood and spores. He couldn't exactly farm in solid metal… well he could be whatever he made wouldn't taste good.
Unbeknownst to him however, amidst the countless junk and debris that covered this space hulk, two pairs of glowing red eyes watched from a distance. The owner of those eyes watched him, staring intently before a blood thirsty grin stretched across their face.
A/N:
It's stupidly hard to plan around the emperor. If he steps in the field, you fucking run and pray he doesn't chase you down.
He looked down upon the crude, kitbashed, holographic display showing a thousand star systems highlighted in green. There seated upon a comfortable throne, he inspected his holdings and found the borders caved. Before him was the map of the entirety of his empire and right at its border highlighted in gold and denoted with the double headed aquila was the enemy at the gates. In one lifetime, he would have rooted for the men under the aquila but today was a different existence, for he was no longer a man and this was an age where there was only war.
"Bozz, the beakie's fleet has just arrived at the edge of the system anz oh boy there'z a lot of them 'ere." One of his men said, a gigantic ork wearing minimal armor, in passable high gothic as he pointed at the spots of golden light streaking straight for the heart of his empire.
He hummed for a bit as he looked at the display before his attention was caught by a meek little human trying to keep her head low as she pushed a large cart containing large tankards of beer. She was one of the human servants that he saved from the slaughter. It was either the frying pan or this; he might no longer be human but he still had some humanity left. He grabbed one as the others jostled for who to get, growling warningly if one of his nobs looked like he was getting a bit hungry.
With his thirst sated, he reached towards the display and gestured for it to zoom in and on each light he'd see the symbol of the legion they were affiliated with. There amongst the ships were the expected symbols of the Omega, a slitted red eye, and a red lightning bolt; but there were those bearing a stylized black first along with a winged eagles claw. They were an unexpected addition to this decapitation strike. He started counting at the green dots and found that his fleet was outnumbered three to one.
"Well color me surprised. They're sending in five of them here? Ha, thought they'd only send in three." He barked out a laugh as he gently placed his beer down on the table before him. It was concerning yes but he couldn't help but smile along with the boys. It was going to be a good fight, he could feel it in his bones.
"So boss, what do we do?" Asked his right hand ork as the stooped weird boy held on his banner. His eyes crackled with green energy.
"We bleed them out. Our fleet will not last long against those 5. Crack open the vaults to the nice shootas and big choppas." He responded as he got off his seat, stretching a bit, and worked on the kinks on his shoulder. He was getting restless and the prospect of a fight was making it worse. "Arm everyone, even the gretchen. Have them crew the larger weapons."
"The one you had Gearhead and his crew make all year long?" another Nob asked with glee in his beady little eyes.
"That vault." He replied with a widened green as he reached for his helm. The stylized orkoid face looking back at him, grinning back at him as if hungry for battle. Well, it certainly wouldn't be hungry for long with the awaiting blood bath. "Abandon the cities, let them take it. We're going to the fortresses." He ordered as he placed his helmet on. It might impede his vision but it was better than having no head at all.
"And miss out on the fightin when they start droppin?" A disgruntled nob wearing power grumbled out. The room became deadly quiet as Magsnik stared at the nob who looked around nervously. His grip tightened at the handle of his adamantine hammer. Flipping his maul so that the spiked end was facing forwards, he reached out with his weapon and pulled the Nob by digging the spike on his armor.
His muscle bulged at the effort of dragging the Ork down but he had to send a message as he growled at his face slowly. "We're not missing out on the fighting. We're just taking the fight where it's going to be the most brutal. Down in the tunnels, there's no cover." he explained to him in pain-staking detail.
He could see the gears grinding in the orks head as he looked crossed eyes down on his tusk before a smile stretched across his face. "Yes boss, I get it now! That's why you is the boss! Yur definitely one of 'dem brain boyz! " He nodded eagerly as he grinned at him. He had to suppress a groan of disappointment as he pulled his hammer off the orks armor. Sometimes, he wondered if this was really worth it.
"Any objections?" He grounded out, waiting for any to make a move but the shakes of their heads and their averted gaze told him their answers. "Then what's with the thumb fiddling here? Get up you lot, the turrets in the mountain aren't going to arm themselves!" He shouted as he slammed the butt of his maul down on the floor.
That spurred them into action as they quickly filtered out of the room. He looked down on them as they passed by him and waited for them to get out before he could give his final orders. Once they were gone, he pointed at the lone servant left in the room. "You, come here," he ordered, making the girl squeak as walked towards him. "Get every servant to safety. Evacuate the palace. Things are going to get ugly." He said as he pulled out a small stubber from one of his pouches and gave it to her as a symbol of her authority. The girl nodded as she took the gun and ran off.
Fiddling with knobs on his belt, he finally got the setting right and smashed the button over the buckle and he was tossed in the immaterium. The wailing sea of souls rejected his orkiness as he shot through it, punching anyone that got too close, before he felt the large concentration of orks nearby and he slammed the button again to which he found himself deposited on the train station where orks of all sizes were boarding their transport. With the sky burning as lances of fire streaked across the heaven, it wouldn't take long before they came down to the ground.
-x-x-x-
He expected this, he'd been preparing for this but when the news came, he still felt he wasn't ready. "Bozz Magsnik! Bozz Magsnik! The Beakies are 'ere! They be droppin like you said they would!" Shouted an ork messenger as he burst into the room, disturbing him from his planning with the boys. He straightened up as he stared at the orks excited face as the cave he was in shooked. The plasteel reinforced ferrocrete pillars the mountain complex cracked despite how they were wider than he was tall and he towered over the other green skinned monsters inside this room.
"Gitzappa, prepare the Weirdboyz." He ordered as he walked towards the nearby window to the battlefield. He was currently inside a bunker where his men could shoot the enemy with impunity. He could be in those underground bunkers but he needed to see things with his own eyes. Currently, some of his own nobs were using the mounted shoota's to spray and pray to the aircraft buzzing by.
Protected by several feet of reinforced ferrocrete, he overlooked the war torn from one of the vantage points of his mountain fortress as the battle raged on from down below. Millions of soldiers of the Imperialis Auxilia assaulted them from all sides, marching along their Leman Russ and supported by their basilisk as they climbed up the slopes of the mountain. The very skies burned as the massive drop ships of the Legio Titanicus and the shells of Nova cannons rained from above. The ground itself trembled as thousands of astartes launched themselves at his defenses but he did not fret for this is exactly what he wanted.
Along with the dropships came the burning hulks of both his own and imperial warships falling from the sky, burning and crushing both humans and orks alike. The sky was lit up as his fortresses' anti air batteries spewed a storm of lead. Men and Astartes alike fell as his forces ambushed them in close quarter combat as these soldiers were forced to fight in the claustrophobic trenches and tunnels dotting his mountain fortress.
"It's almost like Iwo Jima." he chuckled out as he watched with a feral grin on his ugly mug. With five legions barreling straight for his fortress world, he knew the fight would be a tough one. It could be won, he just needed to last longer than they could. A decapitation strike was good for his kind but that could lead to them being trapped behind enemy lines.
"Wuzzat bozz?" One of his Nobz asked as the large ork scratched his head. He suppressed a groan at that. He sometimes wished he had someone to talk to that doesn't require him punching and beating someone but alas, he was an ork. Any talk will eventually devolve into a fight or a challenge.
"Nevermind, just get ready to evacuate to the next fortress. We're taking this fight elsewhere. For now though." he turned to his standard bearer who came with the weirdboyz as instructed. They twitched and mumbled as they hooked to tha banner. The baleful green glow in the eyes of the skull atop the banner was a good sign.
He walked up to the banner and grabbed hold of it. Immediately, power flowed through his veins. Green lightning danced across his skin and down his hammer. They lashed out, singing and striking randomly until he started to exert his might. The lightning turned inward, arching around the banner and his weapon. With this power contained in hand, he raised his hammer and pointed at one of the titans belonging to the Colegio Mortis. Its grizzly form is covered with the skulls of both orks, xenos, and humans alike as it waded around the battlefield. He found a target and nothing in the battlefield right now was more worth his attention as the giant started digging through the tunnels at the side of the mountain.
He breathed in and started pulling at the force of the horde below, drawing at the power permeating every orkoid in this very planet. His lungs filled with not just air but power as the air around him shimmer. Pressure quickly built up as his body was forced to contain the power of the horde, channeled to him by the screaming and roaring weirdboyz around him. His head feeling like it was going to burst, and indeed some of the weirdboyz around him had their heads pop, yet his hammer helped him channel it, drawing it away from his body and preventing it from building up too much. He held on to this raw untapped force until he couldn't anymore.
Thrusting his hammer out, He bellowed out, letting his roar carry out and directing the psychic energy of a billion orcs ark out and hit the Titan squarely on the chest. A million tons of steel was lifted off its feet and sent back tumbling back. It's colossal form crashing against the hard ground, crushing its allies and his own forces as green smoke plumed from its chest. He laughed out maniacally as he felt his blood sing while the force of the WAAAGH bled off.
The weirdboyz around him were left twitching and drooling after being made to channel that much energy. He pulled at his banner, tearing the connection tethering it to them as he handed it back to his standard bearer. He was in no position to talk about toughing it out as his own mind felt like it was being apart. Only his superior constitution as a warboss allowed him to keep going.
With that display of power, his position would soon be focused upon. He needed to get out here soon else he'd be eating Nova Shells as breakfast. He turned around to see his Nobs cheering and shouting as they raised their shoota's and choopa's. "What the hell did I just say? Go on you lot! Scram!" He shouted as he backhanded the nob he commanded earlier with his hammer. A good knock on the head was the quickest way to send his orders across as they scrambled to their feet and ran off.
"I swear these idiots…" he growled out as he shook his head and went to follow them. This mountain was a bust and they'd soon overwhelm it. The next nearest mountain was a thousand miles away and he fully expected one idiot to have the "bright idea" of leaving him behind. Running there would be a pain especially in the cramped tunnels and he did not like the prospect of traveling that far through the warp.
Just as he was about to leave this room, he heard shouting from outside along with the tell tale explosions of a bolter exploding as it hit the Plasteel reinforced ferrocrete of his bunker as well as retaliatory fire from his own men. What peeked his ears were not the gun fire of heavy bolters but the roar of chainswords and the crackling of some energy weapons. He immediately hit his panic button and the alarm claxons rang out and bathed the room in a red light.
The grin on his face turned feral as he burst out of the room and came face to face with the power armor clad form of a Terminator. He had to give credit where it was due as the man immediately aimed his heavy bolter at his head and sprayed lead right at his face. Unfortunately for the man, he was currently wearing a helmet and it pinged off his head uselessly.
He swung his hammer and he savored the sound and feeling of the warriors armor crumpling as he was launched to the wall. The hallway he walked into was large enough to allow a small Gargant to walk around and here was a sizable contingent of white armor clad Astartes led by an absolutely gigantic superhuman wielding a power claw on one hand and a maul on the other. The bald head, the wolf pelt and that singular eye upon his chest piece told him who he was facing.
"Ahhh, the infamous Horus Lupercal of the Luna Wolves." He shouted in greeting as he raised his hand and fired at the Primarch with the modified Stormbolter strapped on his left arm.
He never saw such bullshit as the man swiped his claw and vaporized his shots even when he was clearly surprised. "High Gothic?" The superhuman shouted in surprise as Magsnik was forced to deal with more Terminators. He blocked their swords, letting their tooth blade scratch his adamantine hammer before he pushed them away and they were blasted by his standard bearer's lightning.
"It's a fucking pain to learn I swear, much less teaching to my nobs!" He shouted as he headed straight for the primarch who was clearly intent on killing him. He swiped his hammer, hitting and smashing everyone on his way as bloodlust tinted his vision green. He was going to smash that stupid smile spreading across the mans face.
The primarch laughed as he charged forward, passing by surprised Nobs and Terminators alike, and shouted in response "Hah! I never expected the day that I'd agree with an Ork of all things."
They clashed and at first Horus proved to be the better fighter as he forced him back. He was far faster, more nimble even, and he made great use of it to get under his strikes. Magsnik was missing but soon he found his footing when he started bodying the primarch and using his bigger size and thicker armor. The warsmaster's strikes might dig deeper into his flesh but he was tougher. He bullied the Primarch back as the fighting and claxons attracted every ork in the vicinity.
Magsnik pulled back to take a breather as feral gretchins and snotlings threw themselves at the Primarch as they burst out of the air vents from above. The little creatures proved their worth by showing the son of the emperor why he must always wear a helmet as he was bathed in blood and was blinded by it. The warboss didn't waste his time as he started pelting his enemy with bolter fire for distraction.
"Enough of this!" Roared the primarch as he threw off the last gretchin only to find that he and his children were surrounded by Orks of all sizes. Magsnik laughed out loudly as the ground started to shake and a pair of glowing green eyes appeared from behind Magsnik and Horus.
"I concur." Magsnik agreed as he started to pull at the WAAAGH and channeled it in his hammer just as a pair of small Stomaps appeared from the tunnel. Surrounded on all sides and with no way out, Magsnik roared as he sent his men to the brave and valiant men.
He would soon see Horus mobbed by a green tide giving Magsnik time to fiddle with his teleporter. Horus was fighting like a trapped squig as he sliced through orks left and right but that left him open as Magsnik slammed his hands on the big red button and appeared several feet above the Primarch. With the hammer raised up high, he fell down like a big damn Rok and slammed his hammer right on the Primarchs shoulder. The man feel down from the grievous injury and he was quickly beset by furious and suicidal marines yet it was for naught as their leader was rendered unconscious from the shock leaving them without direction.
He stood atop a pile of Marines as he stared down at the unconscious form of the primarch. "You will make for a useful bargaining tool." He chuckled out as he reached down and picked the Warmaster up for he had a plan, he always had a plan.
With Horus stripped of armor and dragged in chains, Magsnik strolled into battle with his banner attached to his back. The moment he stepped out of his fortress door with the Warmaster in hand, the battlefield seemed to come to a stop as his men turned to him and cheered while the Astarte's morale dropped as they faltered in their charge. There in front of him was the greatest general of the imperium in chains and collared like a common criminal.
"Soldiers of the Imperium!" He called out, letting his voice ring out across the battlefield. "Stand down and your Warmaster might live longer!'' He demanded as he kicked the battered form of the primarch. His right shoulder was a mess but it was a pragmatic choice on his part. He would not live a day longer if Horus died now. With his hammer resting on his shoulder and his banner fluttering in the wind, he looked at the battlefield as it grinded to a halt.
"Boyz, let the Beakies have time to think." He added with a cruel laugh, hamming up his action to get the attention of his men. Thankfully, the Orks held back and fell back to their defensive position. Any Ork smart enough to disobey were dispatched by the wall of guns called his mountain fortress.
That quickly put a damper on the action as he effectively forced a ceasefire down the invaders throats. Combat quickly grinded to a halt as he felt every gun on the enemy's side trained their way towards him. He feared them not for he had someone in between them and his fleshy body. Out from the enemy line stepped a heavily armored astartes clad in artisanal purple armor with the symbol of the imperium proudly used as his own symbol.
"What's stopping us from turning your head into paste, Ork?" The Phoenician asked as he could practically feel the hundreds of red dots appearing on the forehead of his armor. The venom and hate dripping from those words was almost palpable and he reveled in it.
"I'm glad you asked." He replied as he raised his clenched fist and the collar on Horus's neck started to blink. "Wanna fuck around and find out, Phoenician?" He asked. The things you could do with simple and dirt cheap blinking lights was just amusing. One misstep however and he died.
"Why?" called out another voice, this time he couldn't discern where it was but the dry and unamused yet intrigued voice hinted him on who it was.
"Asking for my demands, Praetorian? That would be simple really. Leave." He demanded and even his own men were taken aback. Him, the warboss letting the enemy go? It was the most unorky of demands and no ork in their right mind would ask for a thing. Good thing he wasn't fully orky inside his head. "Isn't a temporary white peace more appealing for both of our sides than what we have now?" He asked.
This was what he wanted. Ullanor in the long run was fucked and there was no prospect of him ever touching his retirement plan if this battle was to continue. He needed the imperium off his back long enough for the Heresy to kick off. With him having one of the primarchs, he might just be able to force that. Everything was going according to his plans until things didn't.
For a brief second, he felt an oppressive pressure descend on the battlefield. He felt four pairs of eyes settle on him until they faded away as a crushing, all encompassing feeling fell upon the battlefield. The battlefield was bathed in golden light before HE arrived.
Clad in golden armor and wielding a flaming sword, the master of mankind arrived in the battle. For a brief moment, Magsnik's eyes met those terrible golden eyes and his spirit started to scream. He felt his feet step backward as overwhelming fear as his custodes started to appear though the very same portal He appeared from. For the first time in his new life, he once more felt fear. Instinct and his conscious mind warred inside him as he felt his throat lock up, his mouth hanging open as the man before him stepped forward with his ten thousand in his back.
All his plans came crashing down as the one person he wished to never personally meet was forced into battle. He knew deep in his bones that this hair brained scheme of his was the cause and now it was going to be a fight for a lifetime. He could already hear the twins roaring in his ears, demanding him to move forward but he couldn't and so he did what any sane person in this insane galaxy would do given his situation.
"Fuck this! I'm out!" He shouted as he tossed the rock he had been holding on the ground before grabbing the banner on his back and thrusting it the the nearest ork. With little to no regards to his own safety, he overloaded his belt by breaking the button and teleported out of the situation. He was forced into the warp screaming and kicking as he was pulled in every which direction. The moment he fled, he felt the twins screaming at him while the sea of souls heaved and roiled. With no way to control where he would land, he floated around blind to the eternities. He swung his hammer around, using what meager energy was left in him to ward off the nipping creatures in the dark for untold ages until it ended as soon as it began.
He found himself crashing and tumbling in a pile of broken metal and rocks. He laid their broken and defeated yet whole and sane. "It actually worked…" He whispered out as he started laughing. He turned to his back and there he beheld a sky filled with stars and around him were the broken remains of hundreds if not thousands of ships.
He did not know where he was and he could not feel the WAAAGH anywhere. He was lost out in space in some unknown space hulk and it suited him just fine. He took in a deep breath and found that the air was thin but that was fine, he was an ork after all. He tried to get up but he found himself weakened, severely so as the armor he wore and the weapon he wielded felt like its actual weight. The WAAAGH left him just as he had left his WAAAGH.
"This… is unexpected but I can work with this." He declared. He was tired and drained but he was very much still alive. Even if his limbs weren't so strong anymore, he now had time aplenty to spend in this little corner of the galaxy, he found a place where war has yet to reach. He was not really cut out for all this war stuff anyways, might as well retire.
"My name is Magsnik Kogchewa and I'm officially retired." He called out to no one as he forced himself up. With his heavy maul in hand, he started to walk in search of a place to make a house in this strange space hulk with its atmosphere and strange heavy gravity.
"This place isn't exactly bad." He declared as his foot found actual silicate rock. Maybe he could actually make this work but he really needed to find a spot to settle down first as his armor needed to be pulled off. A good dark cave would be nice to settle in, somewhere cool, damp and, most importantly of all, hidden away from the prying eyes up in the sky. He was in a space hulk so a trip to the warp from time to time wouldn't be too out of the question. He also needed it to contain plenty of rock to smash and make soil using his blood and spores. He couldn't exactly farm in solid metal… well he could be whatever he made wouldn't taste good.
Unbeknownst to him however, amidst the countless junk and debris that covered this space hulk, two pairs of glowing red eyes watched from a distance. The owner of those eyes watched him, staring intently before a blood thirsty grin stretched across their face.
A/N:
It's stupidly hard to plan around the emperor. If he steps in the field, you fucking run and pray he doesn't chase you down.
I'm surprised he didnt shout "You fucking piece of shit cheater! Im out of here!"
Isiri Pudireach
Predictive text can go duck itself
I'm kinda curious about Emps's thoughts on all dis. Especially after he finds da Humies Da Bozz kept.
Beyogi
and a fairy
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Probably really freaked that there's an Ork with this much survival instincts.
Magsnik Kogchewa: Oi, dat waz a close un. But nowz I be retired!
Big E: Holy shit, an Ork with a survival instinct. Destroy the entire sector.
Chill, Have an Ice Cream: Prologue (My Hero Academia Slice of Life)
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Prologue
Ochako sighed as she started packing her things in her worn out bag only to notice the uneven strap after she picked it up. She clicked her tongue as she just noticed a tear on the stitching of the straps. There was no going around this, she'll have to repair that little tear later. And here she was hoping she could have some extra time to watch TV but with the assignments today as well as the advance reading she needed to do just in case there was some surprise quiz, that looked more and more unlikely.
She wondered if she still had any leftover thread until her train of thought was broken as a wild mane of pink suddenly occupied her field of vision. "Hey Uraraka, wanna go for ice cream later?" asked Mina while a bright smile stretched across her face. Standing beside the pinkette was the cool yet surprisingly friendly beauty of their class, Momo.
She blinked for a bit, taken by surprise by the sudden offer but the lightness of her coin pouch and her grumbling of her empty stomach made her think twice. "I kinda want to go with you, I'm on a diet? Sorry." She lied, apologizing for not being able to go out with them. She really wanted to go with them but she just didn't have the funds for it.
"Oh come on~ You could use a cheat day or two." Mina replied as she walked to Ochako's side and poked her waist. The brunette jumped as she lightly glared at the pinkette who grinned back with a cheeky smile. Mina then added "We're heroes in training! We need all the calories we can get so come on Uraraka, Let's go!"
She looked away as she twiddled with her thumb before she answered back "I don't know, Ice cream are calorie bombs." Delicious, mouth watering calorie bombs she'll gladly indulge in given the the chance. She was tempted, really tempted to join them but that might mean she had to pull from the rainy day funds and that was a big no for her.
Thankfully, Momo was there to back her up. "While we do burn through alot, it's best not to over indulge." Momo said as she tapped her chin while deep in thought. Ochako could almost breath out a sigh of relief at that. She had an excuse to dip out for now. She really hated it but her hands were tied here. Either she enjoys it now and suffer later or temper herself and have it pay off in dividends in the future.
Mina turned to Momo with an annoyed and aggrieved look on her face as she pouted and said "Not everyone can have a quirk fueled by their fat reserves.". Momo only smiled back while Ochako covered her lips as she let out a snicker of amusement. She felt her mood lighten up already despite missing out now. Smalls like this reminded her why she loved hanging around with them. The camaraderie and fun they shared as heroines in training was so more pure. There was no back talking or rumor mongering, it was just this.
While it was fun, it's best not to keep them occupied. They had a long night ahead of them and they were burning daylight. Getting back home after dark is still a daunting prospect. "Well, I hope you guys have fun." She said as she excused herself. Still, that mischievous smile spreading across Mina's face was making her break out in cold sweat. She picked up her pace with cleaning her desk just in case.
"You know~" MIna started as she circled around Ochako before continuing "Maybe we should invite Midoriya as well. Would it be too much? You are treating me and I don't want to impose.". That stopped her in her tracks as the boy perked up at the mention of his name with this cute clueless look on his face. There were growling and shouting in the back of the class but she ignored it as she turned to look at the smug grin in Mina's face as she gave her a look of betrayal. That was just dirty. The offer of free food was bad enough but she wasn't prepared for what Momo was about to say next.
Momo looked at them in surprise before waving Mina's concern with a cheerful smile."Oh, no, It's fine. I was actually thinking of inviting Midoriya as well.". Alarm bells started ringing inside Ochako's head as she saw that smile turn a bit too fond at the end and that light dusting of pink on the raven haired beauty made her panic.
Slamming her palm on her desk, Ochako then shouted "I'll join!". Everyone left in the class stopped what they were doing as they turned towards her. She felt her cheeks burn as she slowly sunk down beneath her desk and covered her face in shame. She wanted her existence to end as Mina's annoying smile stretched from ear to ear.
"Heh." The pinkette simply responded as she pulled out her phone and snapped a photo. Never before had Ochako felt such an urge to throttle someone right now.
Momo tilted her head as she asked "Aren't you on a diet? I wouldn't want to break your plan. I know just how easy it is to go off the rails after just one bite.". Bless this girl's pure soul, She wanted so bad to reach out and both hug and squeeze the life out of the heiress.
Mustering her courage and gathering her wits, she slowly peeked out of her desk as she answered "W-well, I forgot that I missed my cheat day last week. I just realized it now."
"Oh yeah, I remember you passing out on Tsuyu and Tenya's offer for a night out in the city." Momo agreed with a nod. She hid a wince at that. She almost forgot about that. She couldn't join that particular outing because she needed to wash her clothes.
Ochako averted her eyes as she replied "So yeah, I'd join if… if Deku joins.". She felt her cheeks heat up once more but she couldn't miss out on a chance to hang out with the boy. Not when…
"What's this about ice cream Yaoyorozo-chan?" Deku suddenly asked behind her, making her stand up in attention. How did she not notice him walk up to them? This was extremely embarrassing for her. Was her hair still straight? Was her uniform in order? She should really greet him right now and not ignore him.
"Deku! I-I didn't notice you there." She said rather stiffly as the boy smiled at her radiantly. She almost felt her heart skip a bit at that moment. She quickly drove her elbows to the pinkette's side just as she was about to open her mouth and the other girl was quickly brought down to her knees. There was going to be no teasing when she was savoring this moment.
"Worth it." Mina chuckled out in pain as she slowly got back to her feet.
"Oh, I finally got chosen in the Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor raffle and the slot is for tonight. I could bring four friends with me and I was thinking of asking you to join us. I already have Ashido onboard and Ochako here would join if you'll join us" Momo replied as she clapped her hands. "Are you free tonight?" She then asked and the look on Izuku's face made Ochako's felt like jelly.
The way he brightened up and how his cheeks turned red had Ochako's heart hammering like crazy inside her chest. He gasped out and covered his mouth and Ochako wanted nothing more than to flee right there and there but she was rooted in the spot. Her ears burned as she raised her hands before she tried to deny it but she was far too high in cloud nine to reply. She choked on her tongue in surprise and even Mina looked wide eyed in surprise. The words that quickly followed brought her crashing down to the ground.
"M-Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor! The one the former hero it's named after runs? The hero themed shop where All Might and Endeavour frequents? That Ice Cream Shop!?" He shouted excitedly as he grabbed onto Momo's hands. Ochako wanted to scream and tear her hair out before crying. She wanted to turn her back and clutch her chest but this was just Deku being Deku. This was normal, she had to remind herself even as a stray tear dripped down from her cheeks.
"Let me at him! Let me at him!" Mineta roared out in outrage and anger as Tsuyu grabbed him by the collar. Tsuyu actually had to put her back on it as the purple haired boy glared at the utterly oblivious moss haired boy who was too busy fanboying.
"It's not worth it dude. Let it go." Tsuyu said as she dragged him away so he could cool off.
"It's not fair!" Cried out Mineta in despair before it was silenced as the door closed behind them.
"Oh man, I've been trying to win a ticket at his shop for ages. The amount of memorabilia he has for "burrowing" stuff is insane and that's not talking about his photo collection. He usually cycles through them with how large it is" Izuku kept on gushing as Momo stared at him in bewilderment. Thankfully Mina was there to help deal with him as she walked up to the boy and started dragging him away.
"Ok fanboy, enough of that. We still have an ice cream parlor to go to and we can't have you talking Yaoyorozo's ears off with your trivias" The girl said as he held him by the collar of his jacket. He flailed around a bit but quickly calmed down as he let himself be dragged away. Ochako felt laughter bubbling up her chest at the ridiculous sight. He looked like a puppy being dragged away by its mother.
Wiping away the tears off her cheeks, she looked over to Momo before asking "So, is this shop far away?.". It would be a pain if it was far away but she can almost walk back to the station like usual. Besides, she'll have ice cream for dinner which was well worth the effort of walking an extra mile or so.
"Oh, it's just beside the school. We just have to cross a street." Momo answered simply as she walked after the two. Ochako raised a brow at that. How could she have missed this supposedly famous ice cream shop if it was just a stone throw away? Shouldn't she see the line stretching across the block if All Might frequents it all the time?
-x-x-x-
As it turns out, the place was as plain as it can get. Aside from the old fashioned neon light sign, nothing particular stood out from the brick and mortar store. Yes, it looked like it came from some prequirk drama with the ice cream of the day drawn on a blackboard sign along with the old faded colors of red and white stripes, but it was so painfully plain. Still, she couldn't peer through the window as her reflection stared back at her so maybe it looked better inside?
Turning to visibly vibrating Izuku and Momo who looked at the shop in awe, she asked "Are you sure we're in the right place?". Even Mina looked unsure as looked around, trying to find another ice cream shop but there was no building aside from the ice cream shop before them. Still, It definitely had the signs emblazoned in front of the glass door with the All Might-esque figure of an old-timey hero.
"Oh yes, this is definitely the place." Momo replied as she looked up at the large sign in wonder. "It's been months since I've last visited this place. I didn't think I'd actually win the raffle." She added with a nod.
"Wait, you've been here before?" Izuku asked as he looked at the heiress in envy and awe.
'"My father brings me here whenever a family friend wins a slot. Last time I was here was just this summer." Momo replied with a sigh of nostalgia and fond longing. She looked like she was remembering all the good times she had with her parents here. Ochako would be a liar if she wasn't a bit jealous of the other girl but she was also happy for her. Memories with one family was precious and something she'd always treasure.
"Is it really that hard to win the raffle?" Still, Ochako was quite curious about this mystery shop. It seemed that this place was rather exclusive with its customers given how she heard Izuku admit to having tried before and failing. She wondered just the raffle is to make it so hard to get a spot inside?
"Definitely. The fee for the raffle is small, like thirty yen but that's the problem" Izuku said as she frowned. She could definitely see why but she kept on listening as he continued "it's so cheap that everyone and their mother try their luck at least once. With the limited slots, people often sell the slots they won with how lucrative it is. Things can get out of hand fast… like i've seen the ticket price go up to two hundred thousand yen".
Ochako did a spit take as she heard the mind boggling price of the tickets. That was almost one fourth of her family's monthly budget. With how cheap the cost of entry was for the raffle… maybe she should try her luck. She could spare 30 yen for the raffle.
"So, what flavor do you guys have in mind?" Momo asked, breaking her out of her reverie. Her mind defaulted to chocolate or vanilla but maybe they don't have those flavors given how high class this shop seemed so she decided to keep quiet for now.
"Definitely the All American Banana Split! I'm so excited! Mr. Yagi kept on waxing poetic about that particular order and I just can't wait to have a taste for myself." Izuku replied as his eyes sparkled with wonder.
"It's definitely good Izuku though I'm more partial to Mirko's Peanut Butter Ice Cream." Momo replied. Were the ice cream sold in the shop themed after heroes? Well, the All American definitely sounded like something that All Might eats.
"How about you Ashido, Uraraka?" Momo then asked as she walked up to the entrance and pushed the door open. The sound of merriment and music filled the air as she caught glimpse of waitresses dashing around in skates of all things. Well, this place was certainly lively at the very least.
Mina smiled as she proudly replied "Nope! I have nothing in mind but I wonder if they have anything colorful and full of personality?".Ochako snorted in amusement at that as she and the punkette followed Momo inside with Deku trailing behind. Bubblegum ice creams were something that came to mind when it comes to colorful. With Mina having her mind set on her ice cream, the only one left was her.
"Ummm, this is the first time I've heard about this ice cream place so I guess we'll just have to see." Ochako replied as she scratched the back of her head. Choosing a flavor shouldn't be too hard right? That line of thought was quickly derailed the moment they entered the shop.
It wasn't the 50's diner look the shop sported that caught her attention nor the wall filled with memorabilia and candid photos of various heroes and heroines, what caught her attention was the fanged waitress that suddenly filled the entirety of her field of vision. "Welcome to Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor!" The girl greeted them with an almost feverish smile on her face.
It took her a few seconds to process this but Momo didn't even blink as she greeted the young blonde with a casual tone "Hey Himiko, how's it going?". The two obviously knew each other as the blonde practically launched herself at the heiress and hugged her tightly. She held on to Momo like she'll go away if she ever lets go of her and the girl merely gave the blonde a pat on the head despite how uncomfortable she looked with how tightly the waitress hugged her.
"Oh my gosh, Momo! It's been so long! I thought you already forgot about me~" The blonde replied as she let go of the girl. She vibrated in place and it was a miracle that she didn't slip on her roller skates. She was certainly excitable, she had to give her that.
"It's only been a month." Momo answered back.
"A month too long" The girl then said with a pout on her face.
Momo raised her hands in surrender. "Fair enough." she said with a soft smile on her face.
"You two know each other?" Mina then piped up and Ochako nodded at that. They certainly knew each other with how casual they were to each other.
The already wide smile on the girl's face stretched wider as she nodded energetically. "Momo-chan here's a regular here. I can't forget the face of my favorite customer~" She answered as she slung her arm around the taller girl.
Momo smiled fondly at the blonde as reached for her pockets. Pulling out a plain red and white token that reminded her a lot of peppermint candy, she then said "You can say that. Hey, think you can give us four good seats?"
Himiko quickly snatched the token before raising it up against the light. She took a quick look before pocketing it and pulling away from Momo. "Do you have to ask~? Come on." She replied as she twirled around, making her already scandalously short skirt flutter up before she skated away and headed for a particular table near the counter. If it wasn't for the biker short the blonde wore, Ochako's cheeks might have heated up a bit more. Even Deku wasn't immune to the girl's strange charms as he had his gaze turned away while his ears burned.
They followed the girl as she waved at them from the table. She looked at the various patron's inside the ice cream shop and almost did a double take when she saw the hunched form of the number two hero himself, Endeavour staring at his frozen treat which burned with a blue flame. She quickly averted her gaze as the man turned towards them while Deku kept gawking. The man's stare can be quite unnerving in person.
Thankfully, the man turned his attention back to his ice cream as their little group found themselves at a comfortable seat further away from the busy restaurant. She could feel herself sink into the seat and she wanted nothing more than to sleep now with how it felt like she was sitting on clouds.
Toga came back to their table with four menus in hand soon after. She then fished out her phone and pulled out a stylus as she asked "So, what'll it be?".
"I'll have my usual." Momo replied.
"I'll have the All American Sundae!" Izuku then said.
Himiko let out a soft chuckle as she wrote down their order before commenting"Someone's an All Might fan~ So how about you cutie?". She then turned her attention towards Mina who preened at the complement.
Mina leaned forward with a suggestive look on her face "Got anything that'll match my color?"
Himoko pulled up the menu in front of Mina and started flipping through the rather hefty selection of ice cream."I just got that thing. How does a bowl of Superman Ice Cream sound?" She replied as she stopped at a particular page before showing a rather colorful ice cream.
"Ohhh~ I like it." Mina's eyes sparkled as she grabbed the Menu and looked at the frozen treat.
Turning towards her, the waitress then asked "So, how about you honey? Got anything you have in mind?". Ochako picked up the menu and started flipping through the selection. She balked a bit at the price and quickly turned back. They looked good but she did not want to burden Momo with something so expensive. Her eyes quickly turned to the first page and found herself looking at the most basic of selections.
"Ummm…" Ochako hummed for a bit, silently debating if she should go for strawberries or vanilla but the latter's slightly cheaper price gave her her choice. "I'll take the Vanilla on a Waffle Cone?" She replied. The bowl was nice but she felt like she could get more out of the waffle cone.
There was a pause as she felt the girl's eyes staring at her. The intense look she had on her face which was devoid of her usual smile made her feel on edge. The last time someone gave her that stare was their homeroom teacher. It was as if she was looking through her very soul with those piercing golden eyes of hers.
Just as quickly as she sported this look did the smile come back. The girl saluted after she wrote everything down and waved at them as she skated away from them. "Ok~ I'll make sure to tell the old man that one of our regulars came back with friends and a special boy." The girl teased out making Momo blush rather intensely. Her unease was quickly replaced with a pang of jealousy but thankfully Deku was far too busy gushing about the photo hanging beside their chair. It was a black haired woman and All Might punching some unknown tuxedo wearing villain.
"Himiko!" Momo called out but the girl was already back at the counter telling their order to the huge dark skinned man manning the register. "That girl…" Momo sighed out with a shake of her head.
Biting her lips, Ochako then asked "Is she always this…?". It was hard to describe Himiko's herness. She was weird but not in a bad way but dealing with her was exhausting.
"Excitable? Intense?" Momo listed out before Ochako nodded at the latter descriptor. That was the word that she'd been missing. Momo chuckled as she leaned back and replied "Yes, that's Himiko for you. She has an eye for interesting people or so Mr. Fantastic say. I swear he's the only one that can keep her on a short leash, well aside from Kaina but she doesn't count."
"That I do. Sorry about Himiko." A voice suddenly apologized, making Ochako, Mina and Izuku jump in surprise as they turned to find the apron of a huge man. They turned their heads up and up and up as they beheld a chocolate skinned man holding a tray with their order. Ochako couldn't help but gape at the man. He looked just as, if not bigger, than All Might. He was definitely a foreigner and not just tanned or half like Mirko.
"Holy crap where did you come from! And is that our order?" Mina shouted in shock as she pointed at the man.
"Right you are on that one missy." the man replied as he started setting their order down. Momo was the first one to get hers, a rather heavy looking treat with all sorts of nuts topping several scoops of peanut ice cream topped with a candy in the shape of a carrot. Mina got hers next, a bowl of ice cream that was a mix of red, blue and yellow with matching sprinkles and hard shelled button-shaped chocolates.
"Wow, that was quick. I thought that would take longer. Like, did not expect the service to be instant!" commented as she looked down upon her bowl of ice cream with barely contained hunger.
The large man merely quirked his lips as he said "Quirks are bullshit." That got a chuckle out of her and Izuku. Even with all the knowledge people have in this day and age, Quirks can still be quite bullshit indeed.
"That's Mr. Fantastic for you! He's the fastest hero I know of but his quirk..." Izuku cheered before trailing at the end as he started muttering about what the man's quirk could be. Super speed? Teleportation?
"Is a secret." the now identified Mr. Fantastic replied as he gave him his order. The boat-shaped bowl contained a scoop of vanilla, chocolate and strawberry sandwiched between a banana split in half. Each scoop was topped with whipped cream and cherry along with a healthy serving of chocolate syrup. Ochako's empty stomach grumbled a lot louder, enough that everyone in the table heard. Ochako blushed as she sunk into her seat while her friends and the man chuckled.
Finally, it was her order but it was not what she ordered. Instead of a waffle cone, what she had was a large bowl of vanilla ice cream, much more so than the single scoop she ordered. "Umm sir, I think you gave me the wrong order" she brought it up. She didn't want Momo to pay too much for her order even if she wanted to dig in.
The man blinked as he looked down on her order. "Oh, would you look at that? I forgot to add the toppings." the large man replied as he snapped his fingers and suddenly a tray of condiments dropped on his awaiting. "Caramel, Chocolate or Strawberry?" the man asked as he pulled out three normal sized bottles that looked miniscule in his hands.
"There's no need! I can't-!!" Ochako panicked as she stood up only for the man to smile at her and shook his head.
"Don't worry about it. It's in the house. All your orders are especially your Momo-chan!" The man simply replied with a smile making the rest of the table light up with smiles. The man simply shrugged as he added "Hey, no one said I can't treat students from my Alma mater. So, what toppings will it be?" The man softly asked, making her slowly sit down on her seat. She felt her throat tighten up as she looked down on her treat.
"... Strawberry" She choked out with a shaky smile as the man nodded as he placed the bottles back on the tray and picked out another before he started sprucing up her ice cream. First came a generous serving of strawberries which bathed in some form of syrup before they were drizzled with a thick syrup which shouldn't quite call as caramel with how dark and fragrant it was. She was left with an appetizing bowl of strawberries and vanilla ice cream. With a bow and flourish, the man disappeared and reappeared back in the cashier in the blink of an eye.
With their order here, they could finally dig in. Ochako stared at her ice cream before she picked up the golden spoon that came with the bowl. She dug in the scoop and made sure to get some of the syrup and strawberries before taking a bite. The sweet and tart taste of the syrup perfectly complemented the creamy vanilla ice cream and the sweetened strawberries. One spoon turned to many as she felt tears drip down her cheeks.
"Ochako? Are you ok?" Momo asked as she paused. The others looked at her in worry but she simply shook her head as she swallowed the delicious treat.
"Y-yes, It's just so good!" She shakily replied as a large smile stretched across her face. The kindness of the man and the taste of the treat was all too much for her emotions welled up from her chest. She just couldn't help herself feel so happy right now.
"Oh now I'm curious. Give me a taste~!" Mina replied as she reached out for her strawberry filled goodness and Ochako swatted her spoon away with her own as she cradled the treat close to her chest.
"No! Mine!" She cried out as she quickened her pace.
"Oh come on~ Just one bite." Mina begged before everyone at the table laughed out loudly. For a brief instance in time, the specter of having to worry about the bill faded away and she could just enjoy this time with her friend. She savored every minute of it and hoped that in the future, she could have this feeling once again.
A/N:
No matter how many times I keep telling my self that I should really expect the unexpected with my patrons, I still keep getting surprised by their choices. Still, I can't say my patrons have shit taste cause I love writing this shit. Give thanks to Tikky for this one cause he inspired me with that idea over at Shiro's discord.
Ochako sighed as she started packing her things in her worn out bag only to notice the uneven strap after she picked it up. She clicked her tongue as she just noticed a tear on the stitching of the straps. There was no going around this, she'll have to repair that little tear later. And here she was hoping she could have some extra time to watch TV but with the assignments today as well as the advance reading she needed to do just in case there was some surprise quiz, that looked more and more unlikely.
She wondered if she still had any leftover thread until her train of thought was broken as a wild mane of pink suddenly occupied her field of vision. "Hey Uraraka, wanna go for ice cream later?" asked Mina while a bright smile stretched across her face. Standing beside the pinkette was the cool yet surprisingly friendly beauty of their class, Momo.
She blinked for a bit, taken by surprise by the sudden offer but the lightness of her coin pouch and her grumbling of her empty stomach made her think twice. "I kinda want to go with you, I'm on a diet? Sorry." She lied, apologizing for not being able to go out with them. She really wanted to go with them but she just didn't have the funds for it.
"Oh come on~ You could use a cheat day or two." Mina replied as she walked to Ochako's side and poked her waist. The brunette jumped as she lightly glared at the pinkette who grinned back with a cheeky smile. Mina then added "We're heroes in training! We need all the calories we can get so come on Uraraka, Let's go!"
She looked away as she twiddled with her thumb before she answered back "I don't know, Ice cream are calorie bombs." Delicious, mouth watering calorie bombs she'll gladly indulge in given the the chance. She was tempted, really tempted to join them but that might mean she had to pull from the rainy day funds and that was a big no for her.
Thankfully, Momo was there to back her up. "While we do burn through alot, it's best not to over indulge." Momo said as she tapped her chin while deep in thought. Ochako could almost breath out a sigh of relief at that. She had an excuse to dip out for now. She really hated it but her hands were tied here. Either she enjoys it now and suffer later or temper herself and have it pay off in dividends in the future.
Mina turned to Momo with an annoyed and aggrieved look on her face as she pouted and said "Not everyone can have a quirk fueled by their fat reserves.". Momo only smiled back while Ochako covered her lips as she let out a snicker of amusement. She felt her mood lighten up already despite missing out now. Smalls like this reminded her why she loved hanging around with them. The camaraderie and fun they shared as heroines in training was so more pure. There was no back talking or rumor mongering, it was just this.
While it was fun, it's best not to keep them occupied. They had a long night ahead of them and they were burning daylight. Getting back home after dark is still a daunting prospect. "Well, I hope you guys have fun." She said as she excused herself. Still, that mischievous smile spreading across Mina's face was making her break out in cold sweat. She picked up her pace with cleaning her desk just in case.
"You know~" MIna started as she circled around Ochako before continuing "Maybe we should invite Midoriya as well. Would it be too much? You are treating me and I don't want to impose.". That stopped her in her tracks as the boy perked up at the mention of his name with this cute clueless look on his face. There were growling and shouting in the back of the class but she ignored it as she turned to look at the smug grin in Mina's face as she gave her a look of betrayal. That was just dirty. The offer of free food was bad enough but she wasn't prepared for what Momo was about to say next.
Momo looked at them in surprise before waving Mina's concern with a cheerful smile."Oh, no, It's fine. I was actually thinking of inviting Midoriya as well.". Alarm bells started ringing inside Ochako's head as she saw that smile turn a bit too fond at the end and that light dusting of pink on the raven haired beauty made her panic.
Slamming her palm on her desk, Ochako then shouted "I'll join!". Everyone left in the class stopped what they were doing as they turned towards her. She felt her cheeks burn as she slowly sunk down beneath her desk and covered her face in shame. She wanted her existence to end as Mina's annoying smile stretched from ear to ear.
"Heh." The pinkette simply responded as she pulled out her phone and snapped a photo. Never before had Ochako felt such an urge to throttle someone right now.
Momo tilted her head as she asked "Aren't you on a diet? I wouldn't want to break your plan. I know just how easy it is to go off the rails after just one bite.". Bless this girl's pure soul, She wanted so bad to reach out and both hug and squeeze the life out of the heiress.
Mustering her courage and gathering her wits, she slowly peeked out of her desk as she answered "W-well, I forgot that I missed my cheat day last week. I just realized it now."
"Oh yeah, I remember you passing out on Tsuyu and Tenya's offer for a night out in the city." Momo agreed with a nod. She hid a wince at that. She almost forgot about that. She couldn't join that particular outing because she needed to wash her clothes.
Ochako averted her eyes as she replied "So yeah, I'd join if… if Deku joins.". She felt her cheeks heat up once more but she couldn't miss out on a chance to hang out with the boy. Not when…
"What's this about ice cream Yaoyorozo-chan?" Deku suddenly asked behind her, making her stand up in attention. How did she not notice him walk up to them? This was extremely embarrassing for her. Was her hair still straight? Was her uniform in order? She should really greet him right now and not ignore him.
"Deku! I-I didn't notice you there." She said rather stiffly as the boy smiled at her radiantly. She almost felt her heart skip a bit at that moment. She quickly drove her elbows to the pinkette's side just as she was about to open her mouth and the other girl was quickly brought down to her knees. There was going to be no teasing when she was savoring this moment.
"Worth it." Mina chuckled out in pain as she slowly got back to her feet.
"Oh, I finally got chosen in the Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor raffle and the slot is for tonight. I could bring four friends with me and I was thinking of asking you to join us. I already have Ashido onboard and Ochako here would join if you'll join us" Momo replied as she clapped her hands. "Are you free tonight?" She then asked and the look on Izuku's face made Ochako's felt like jelly.
The way he brightened up and how his cheeks turned red had Ochako's heart hammering like crazy inside her chest. He gasped out and covered his mouth and Ochako wanted nothing more than to flee right there and there but she was rooted in the spot. Her ears burned as she raised her hands before she tried to deny it but she was far too high in cloud nine to reply. She choked on her tongue in surprise and even Mina looked wide eyed in surprise. The words that quickly followed brought her crashing down to the ground.
"M-Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor! The one the former hero it's named after runs? The hero themed shop where All Might and Endeavour frequents? That Ice Cream Shop!?" He shouted excitedly as he grabbed onto Momo's hands. Ochako wanted to scream and tear her hair out before crying. She wanted to turn her back and clutch her chest but this was just Deku being Deku. This was normal, she had to remind herself even as a stray tear dripped down from her cheeks.
"Let me at him! Let me at him!" Mineta roared out in outrage and anger as Tsuyu grabbed him by the collar. Tsuyu actually had to put her back on it as the purple haired boy glared at the utterly oblivious moss haired boy who was too busy fanboying.
"It's not worth it dude. Let it go." Tsuyu said as she dragged him away so he could cool off.
"It's not fair!" Cried out Mineta in despair before it was silenced as the door closed behind them.
"Oh man, I've been trying to win a ticket at his shop for ages. The amount of memorabilia he has for "burrowing" stuff is insane and that's not talking about his photo collection. He usually cycles through them with how large it is" Izuku kept on gushing as Momo stared at him in bewilderment. Thankfully Mina was there to help deal with him as she walked up to the boy and started dragging him away.
"Ok fanboy, enough of that. We still have an ice cream parlor to go to and we can't have you talking Yaoyorozo's ears off with your trivias" The girl said as he held him by the collar of his jacket. He flailed around a bit but quickly calmed down as he let himself be dragged away. Ochako felt laughter bubbling up her chest at the ridiculous sight. He looked like a puppy being dragged away by its mother.
Wiping away the tears off her cheeks, she looked over to Momo before asking "So, is this shop far away?.". It would be a pain if it was far away but she can almost walk back to the station like usual. Besides, she'll have ice cream for dinner which was well worth the effort of walking an extra mile or so.
"Oh, it's just beside the school. We just have to cross a street." Momo answered simply as she walked after the two. Ochako raised a brow at that. How could she have missed this supposedly famous ice cream shop if it was just a stone throw away? Shouldn't she see the line stretching across the block if All Might frequents it all the time?
-x-x-x-
As it turns out, the place was as plain as it can get. Aside from the old fashioned neon light sign, nothing particular stood out from the brick and mortar store. Yes, it looked like it came from some prequirk drama with the ice cream of the day drawn on a blackboard sign along with the old faded colors of red and white stripes, but it was so painfully plain. Still, she couldn't peer through the window as her reflection stared back at her so maybe it looked better inside?
Turning to visibly vibrating Izuku and Momo who looked at the shop in awe, she asked "Are you sure we're in the right place?". Even Mina looked unsure as looked around, trying to find another ice cream shop but there was no building aside from the ice cream shop before them. Still, It definitely had the signs emblazoned in front of the glass door with the All Might-esque figure of an old-timey hero.
"Oh yes, this is definitely the place." Momo replied as she looked up at the large sign in wonder. "It's been months since I've last visited this place. I didn't think I'd actually win the raffle." She added with a nod.
"Wait, you've been here before?" Izuku asked as he looked at the heiress in envy and awe.
'"My father brings me here whenever a family friend wins a slot. Last time I was here was just this summer." Momo replied with a sigh of nostalgia and fond longing. She looked like she was remembering all the good times she had with her parents here. Ochako would be a liar if she wasn't a bit jealous of the other girl but she was also happy for her. Memories with one family was precious and something she'd always treasure.
"Is it really that hard to win the raffle?" Still, Ochako was quite curious about this mystery shop. It seemed that this place was rather exclusive with its customers given how she heard Izuku admit to having tried before and failing. She wondered just the raffle is to make it so hard to get a spot inside?
"Definitely. The fee for the raffle is small, like thirty yen but that's the problem" Izuku said as she frowned. She could definitely see why but she kept on listening as he continued "it's so cheap that everyone and their mother try their luck at least once. With the limited slots, people often sell the slots they won with how lucrative it is. Things can get out of hand fast… like i've seen the ticket price go up to two hundred thousand yen".
Ochako did a spit take as she heard the mind boggling price of the tickets. That was almost one fourth of her family's monthly budget. With how cheap the cost of entry was for the raffle… maybe she should try her luck. She could spare 30 yen for the raffle.
"So, what flavor do you guys have in mind?" Momo asked, breaking her out of her reverie. Her mind defaulted to chocolate or vanilla but maybe they don't have those flavors given how high class this shop seemed so she decided to keep quiet for now.
"Definitely the All American Banana Split! I'm so excited! Mr. Yagi kept on waxing poetic about that particular order and I just can't wait to have a taste for myself." Izuku replied as his eyes sparkled with wonder.
"It's definitely good Izuku though I'm more partial to Mirko's Peanut Butter Ice Cream." Momo replied. Were the ice cream sold in the shop themed after heroes? Well, the All American definitely sounded like something that All Might eats.
"How about you Ashido, Uraraka?" Momo then asked as she walked up to the entrance and pushed the door open. The sound of merriment and music filled the air as she caught glimpse of waitresses dashing around in skates of all things. Well, this place was certainly lively at the very least.
Mina smiled as she proudly replied "Nope! I have nothing in mind but I wonder if they have anything colorful and full of personality?".Ochako snorted in amusement at that as she and the punkette followed Momo inside with Deku trailing behind. Bubblegum ice creams were something that came to mind when it comes to colorful. With Mina having her mind set on her ice cream, the only one left was her.
"Ummm, this is the first time I've heard about this ice cream place so I guess we'll just have to see." Ochako replied as she scratched the back of her head. Choosing a flavor shouldn't be too hard right? That line of thought was quickly derailed the moment they entered the shop.
It wasn't the 50's diner look the shop sported that caught her attention nor the wall filled with memorabilia and candid photos of various heroes and heroines, what caught her attention was the fanged waitress that suddenly filled the entirety of her field of vision. "Welcome to Mr. Fantastic's Ice Cream Parlor!" The girl greeted them with an almost feverish smile on her face.
It took her a few seconds to process this but Momo didn't even blink as she greeted the young blonde with a casual tone "Hey Himiko, how's it going?". The two obviously knew each other as the blonde practically launched herself at the heiress and hugged her tightly. She held on to Momo like she'll go away if she ever lets go of her and the girl merely gave the blonde a pat on the head despite how uncomfortable she looked with how tightly the waitress hugged her.
"Oh my gosh, Momo! It's been so long! I thought you already forgot about me~" The blonde replied as she let go of the girl. She vibrated in place and it was a miracle that she didn't slip on her roller skates. She was certainly excitable, she had to give her that.
"It's only been a month." Momo answered back.
"A month too long" The girl then said with a pout on her face.
Momo raised her hands in surrender. "Fair enough." she said with a soft smile on her face.
"You two know each other?" Mina then piped up and Ochako nodded at that. They certainly knew each other with how casual they were to each other.
The already wide smile on the girl's face stretched wider as she nodded energetically. "Momo-chan here's a regular here. I can't forget the face of my favorite customer~" She answered as she slung her arm around the taller girl.
Momo smiled fondly at the blonde as reached for her pockets. Pulling out a plain red and white token that reminded her a lot of peppermint candy, she then said "You can say that. Hey, think you can give us four good seats?"
Himiko quickly snatched the token before raising it up against the light. She took a quick look before pocketing it and pulling away from Momo. "Do you have to ask~? Come on." She replied as she twirled around, making her already scandalously short skirt flutter up before she skated away and headed for a particular table near the counter. If it wasn't for the biker short the blonde wore, Ochako's cheeks might have heated up a bit more. Even Deku wasn't immune to the girl's strange charms as he had his gaze turned away while his ears burned.
They followed the girl as she waved at them from the table. She looked at the various patron's inside the ice cream shop and almost did a double take when she saw the hunched form of the number two hero himself, Endeavour staring at his frozen treat which burned with a blue flame. She quickly averted her gaze as the man turned towards them while Deku kept gawking. The man's stare can be quite unnerving in person.
Thankfully, the man turned his attention back to his ice cream as their little group found themselves at a comfortable seat further away from the busy restaurant. She could feel herself sink into the seat and she wanted nothing more than to sleep now with how it felt like she was sitting on clouds.
Toga came back to their table with four menus in hand soon after. She then fished out her phone and pulled out a stylus as she asked "So, what'll it be?".
"I'll have my usual." Momo replied.
"I'll have the All American Sundae!" Izuku then said.
Himiko let out a soft chuckle as she wrote down their order before commenting"Someone's an All Might fan~ So how about you cutie?". She then turned her attention towards Mina who preened at the complement.
Mina leaned forward with a suggestive look on her face "Got anything that'll match my color?"
Himoko pulled up the menu in front of Mina and started flipping through the rather hefty selection of ice cream."I just got that thing. How does a bowl of Superman Ice Cream sound?" She replied as she stopped at a particular page before showing a rather colorful ice cream.
"Ohhh~ I like it." Mina's eyes sparkled as she grabbed the Menu and looked at the frozen treat.
Turning towards her, the waitress then asked "So, how about you honey? Got anything you have in mind?". Ochako picked up the menu and started flipping through the selection. She balked a bit at the price and quickly turned back. They looked good but she did not want to burden Momo with something so expensive. Her eyes quickly turned to the first page and found herself looking at the most basic of selections.
"Ummm…" Ochako hummed for a bit, silently debating if she should go for strawberries or vanilla but the latter's slightly cheaper price gave her her choice. "I'll take the Vanilla on a Waffle Cone?" She replied. The bowl was nice but she felt like she could get more out of the waffle cone.
There was a pause as she felt the girl's eyes staring at her. The intense look she had on her face which was devoid of her usual smile made her feel on edge. The last time someone gave her that stare was their homeroom teacher. It was as if she was looking through her very soul with those piercing golden eyes of hers.
Just as quickly as she sported this look did the smile come back. The girl saluted after she wrote everything down and waved at them as she skated away from them. "Ok~ I'll make sure to tell the old man that one of our regulars came back with friends and a special boy." The girl teased out making Momo blush rather intensely. Her unease was quickly replaced with a pang of jealousy but thankfully Deku was far too busy gushing about the photo hanging beside their chair. It was a black haired woman and All Might punching some unknown tuxedo wearing villain.
"Himiko!" Momo called out but the girl was already back at the counter telling their order to the huge dark skinned man manning the register. "That girl…" Momo sighed out with a shake of her head.
Biting her lips, Ochako then asked "Is she always this…?". It was hard to describe Himiko's herness. She was weird but not in a bad way but dealing with her was exhausting.
"Excitable? Intense?" Momo listed out before Ochako nodded at the latter descriptor. That was the word that she'd been missing. Momo chuckled as she leaned back and replied "Yes, that's Himiko for you. She has an eye for interesting people or so Mr. Fantastic say. I swear he's the only one that can keep her on a short leash, well aside from Kaina but she doesn't count."
"That I do. Sorry about Himiko." A voice suddenly apologized, making Ochako, Mina and Izuku jump in surprise as they turned to find the apron of a huge man. They turned their heads up and up and up as they beheld a chocolate skinned man holding a tray with their order. Ochako couldn't help but gape at the man. He looked just as, if not bigger, than All Might. He was definitely a foreigner and not just tanned or half like Mirko.
"Holy crap where did you come from! And is that our order?" Mina shouted in shock as she pointed at the man.
"Right you are on that one missy." the man replied as he started setting their order down. Momo was the first one to get hers, a rather heavy looking treat with all sorts of nuts topping several scoops of peanut ice cream topped with a candy in the shape of a carrot. Mina got hers next, a bowl of ice cream that was a mix of red, blue and yellow with matching sprinkles and hard shelled button-shaped chocolates.
"Wow, that was quick. I thought that would take longer. Like, did not expect the service to be instant!" commented as she looked down upon her bowl of ice cream with barely contained hunger.
The large man merely quirked his lips as he said "Quirks are bullshit." That got a chuckle out of her and Izuku. Even with all the knowledge people have in this day and age, Quirks can still be quite bullshit indeed.
"That's Mr. Fantastic for you! He's the fastest hero I know of but his quirk..." Izuku cheered before trailing at the end as he started muttering about what the man's quirk could be. Super speed? Teleportation?
"Is a secret." the now identified Mr. Fantastic replied as he gave him his order. The boat-shaped bowl contained a scoop of vanilla, chocolate and strawberry sandwiched between a banana split in half. Each scoop was topped with whipped cream and cherry along with a healthy serving of chocolate syrup. Ochako's empty stomach grumbled a lot louder, enough that everyone in the table heard. Ochako blushed as she sunk into her seat while her friends and the man chuckled.
Finally, it was her order but it was not what she ordered. Instead of a waffle cone, what she had was a large bowl of vanilla ice cream, much more so than the single scoop she ordered. "Umm sir, I think you gave me the wrong order" she brought it up. She didn't want Momo to pay too much for her order even if she wanted to dig in.
The man blinked as he looked down on her order. "Oh, would you look at that? I forgot to add the toppings." the large man replied as he snapped his fingers and suddenly a tray of condiments dropped on his awaiting. "Caramel, Chocolate or Strawberry?" the man asked as he pulled out three normal sized bottles that looked miniscule in his hands.
"There's no need! I can't-!!" Ochako panicked as she stood up only for the man to smile at her and shook his head.
"Don't worry about it. It's in the house. All your orders are especially your Momo-chan!" The man simply replied with a smile making the rest of the table light up with smiles. The man simply shrugged as he added "Hey, no one said I can't treat students from my Alma mater. So, what toppings will it be?" The man softly asked, making her slowly sit down on her seat. She felt her throat tighten up as she looked down on her treat.
"... Strawberry" She choked out with a shaky smile as the man nodded as he placed the bottles back on the tray and picked out another before he started sprucing up her ice cream. First came a generous serving of strawberries which bathed in some form of syrup before they were drizzled with a thick syrup which shouldn't quite call as caramel with how dark and fragrant it was. She was left with an appetizing bowl of strawberries and vanilla ice cream. With a bow and flourish, the man disappeared and reappeared back in the cashier in the blink of an eye.
With their order here, they could finally dig in. Ochako stared at her ice cream before she picked up the golden spoon that came with the bowl. She dug in the scoop and made sure to get some of the syrup and strawberries before taking a bite. The sweet and tart taste of the syrup perfectly complemented the creamy vanilla ice cream and the sweetened strawberries. One spoon turned to many as she felt tears drip down her cheeks.
"Ochako? Are you ok?" Momo asked as she paused. The others looked at her in worry but she simply shook her head as she swallowed the delicious treat.
"Y-yes, It's just so good!" She shakily replied as a large smile stretched across her face. The kindness of the man and the taste of the treat was all too much for her emotions welled up from her chest. She just couldn't help herself feel so happy right now.
"Oh now I'm curious. Give me a taste~!" Mina replied as she reached out for her strawberry filled goodness and Ochako swatted her spoon away with her own as she cradled the treat close to her chest.
"No! Mine!" She cried out as she quickened her pace.
"Oh come on~ Just one bite." Mina begged before everyone at the table laughed out loudly. For a brief instance in time, the specter of having to worry about the bill faded away and she could just enjoy this time with her friend. She savored every minute of it and hoped that in the future, she could have this feeling once again.
A/N:
No matter how many times I keep telling my self that I should really expect the unexpected with my patrons, I still keep getting surprised by their choices. Still, I can't say my patrons have shit taste cause I love writing this shit. Give thanks to Tikky for this one cause he inspired me with that idea over at Shiro's discord.
Isiri Pudireach
Predictive text can go duck itself
Ah, Himiko's living in an icecream parlor AU.
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Hmmm, she does live and work in an Ice Cream parlor so it is though this fic is more the idea that MC decided heroing is too much so he retired and just did ice cream
The little acts of kindness goes a long way yeah?
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
![[IMG]](https://i.imgur.com/UREW45S.jpg "[IMG]")
A Warboss's Retirement Plan won the polls for December and now has a Chapter 1 written for it. Chapter 1 is up now in Patreon, Ko-Fi page, and SubscribeStar so if you're interested in reading it in advance, you know where to look. Writing it was the easiest I had in a while because it was just writing itself. New character gets to be introduced in next chapter so hope you guys are just as excited as I am for her! Here's a little teaser I want to share just to entice you all, just... around 600 words of it. Enjoy and see you next week!
Chapter 1: Homesteading 101
Magsnik raised his heavy maul up high air even as his muscles ached from the effort. Sweat dripped down his brow as he roared and brought it down as hard as he could down at his target. Stone was pulverized, Ferrocrete broken, and the metal within bent as the former warboss toiled away, crushing the debris around the edge of his growing farm. The mycelium might be able to break everything down eventually to usable soil but smashing things down to smithereens made it faster.
He toiled away at the hard ground while the soft green and blue glow of the tree-like mushrooms growing near the edge of his farm illuminated his area. Looking above, he'd see the large, claw-like, pieces of rocks and ships reaching up to the void lining the edge of the crater where his farm was. Up there in the sky above hung a huge tear in reality, staring down at his humble farm like the eyes of a great reptilian beast. It formed above his home not too long after he arrived. At first it was small, barely comparable to that of the Eye but it grew larger until it grew as wide as the crater but it stopped. He had an inkling of how it was formed as it had stopped growing after a while, staying as a large black tear above the starry sky.
This was where he now lived, right inside one of the craters dotting this gigantic hulk which drifted in space in its lonesome. Nestled right in the middle of it all was his home and he made it his mission to expand the farm until the entire crater was filled with life. It was just him, his farm and the tools he bought with him. Turning back to the rubble, he grunted as he went back to work "There's no one to talk to…"
After breaking one last boulder, he finally decided to call it a day. He sat his hammer down before pulling the gourd he had strapped to his hips. Pulling off the cork, he allowed himself a good long sip of precious water. The cold melt-water was quite the refreshing drink, especially after a day's work. Speaking of work, He looked at the sizable patch of rubble he made and nodded in appreciation. It was slow progress but each day brought him closer to finally expanding the mushroom forest to the point that he'd have some snotling around to bully though he was a touch bit apprehensive at that.
He was quickly reminded why as the soil nearby burst open revealing a newly born squig. The fat, squat thing which was more a mouth with two legs than anything else shook itself off the amniotic fluid that dripped from its dark red skin before it caught a whiff of the ork. It turned around and caught sight of him. The fungoid creature just woke up and it chose violence as it roared out and charged at him with unsteady legs.
Magsnik let out a groan but he wasn't one to complain about a boon despite the fact that said boon thought he was an affront to nature. He jabbed his hammer at its face, making it stumble over on its back disoriented, which made his job of catching it a whole lot easier. He picked up the feisty little bugger before tossing it on the large woven basket strapped to his back. He closes the basket tightly to avoid any unwanted accidents.
"One more Squig to fatten up." He whispered to himself with a satisfied smile as he started scouring the rubble for any usable metal.
Magsnik raised his heavy maul up high air even as his muscles ached from the effort. Sweat dripped down his brow as he roared and brought it down as hard as he could down at his target. Stone was pulverized, Ferrocrete broken, and the metal within bent as the former warboss toiled away, crushing the debris around the edge of his growing farm. The mycelium might be able to break everything down eventually to usable soil but smashing things down to smithereens made it faster.
He toiled away at the hard ground while the soft green and blue glow of the tree-like mushrooms growing near the edge of his farm illuminated his area. Looking above, he'd see the large, claw-like, pieces of rocks and ships reaching up to the void lining the edge of the crater where his farm was. Up there in the sky above hung a huge tear in reality, staring down at his humble farm like the eyes of a great reptilian beast. It formed above his home not too long after he arrived. At first it was small, barely comparable to that of the Eye but it grew larger until it grew as wide as the crater but it stopped. He had an inkling of how it was formed as it had stopped growing after a while, staying as a large black tear above the starry sky.
This was where he now lived, right inside one of the craters dotting this gigantic hulk which drifted in space in its lonesome. Nestled right in the middle of it all was his home and he made it his mission to expand the farm until the entire crater was filled with life. It was just him, his farm and the tools he bought with him. Turning back to the rubble, he grunted as he went back to work "There's no one to talk to…"
After breaking one last boulder, he finally decided to call it a day. He sat his hammer down before pulling the gourd he had strapped to his hips. Pulling off the cork, he allowed himself a good long sip of precious water. The cold melt-water was quite the refreshing drink, especially after a day's work. Speaking of work, He looked at the sizable patch of rubble he made and nodded in appreciation. It was slow progress but each day brought him closer to finally expanding the mushroom forest to the point that he'd have some snotling around to bully though he was a touch bit apprehensive at that.
He was quickly reminded why as the soil nearby burst open revealing a newly born squig. The fat, squat thing which was more a mouth with two legs than anything else shook itself off the amniotic fluid that dripped from its dark red skin before it caught a whiff of the ork. It turned around and caught sight of him. The fungoid creature just woke up and it chose violence as it roared out and charged at him with unsteady legs.
Magsnik let out a groan but he wasn't one to complain about a boon despite the fact that said boon thought he was an affront to nature. He jabbed his hammer at its face, making it stumble over on its back disoriented, which made his job of catching it a whole lot easier. He picked up the feisty little bugger before tossing it on the large woven basket strapped to his back. He closes the basket tightly to avoid any unwanted accidents.
"One more Squig to fatten up." He whispered to himself with a satisfied smile as he started scouring the rubble for any usable metal.
Shiki's Twenty Year Plan [One Piece SI] - Ch 0
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Prologue
High up in the clouds, far from the insanity that was the Blue Sea down below, was where Shiki finally retired. The view was amazing up in the sky with nothing but birds and clouds to accompany him. The sound of the wind and the cries of seagulls brought him back and allowed him to reminisce on days gone by.
Don't get him wrong, he was still very much a pirate at heart but without Roger, the seas weren't that interesting. He could have conquered the world but was it even worth it if he had no equal to gloat at? Life was interesting when Roger was around because that man brought out the best in him. He had a dream and that was to wipe the smile off that infuriating mug of his rival but the fucking Marines of all people took that dream away from him.
It wasn't he, Shiki the Flying Pirate that killed Roger, but two faceless men whose sole task was to execute the Pirate King in the weakest sea. It was insulting and down right infuriating that they didn't even have Garp kill him or even one of those rising stars like that mad dog or that cold mother fucker. No, they had to give his rival the most ignoble of deaths and that didn't sit right with him. He took that personally and with that, he'd made the dumbest and most boneheaded move he could have done. Stupid as it may have been, he'd still done it but at least it was over; it'd been twenty years if he remembered correctly.
He scratched his knees while he sat on the edge of the wall surrounding the deck of his ship, "Damn harness' itchy as hell. I miss them being buried in my legs," He grumbled out as he chewed on the butt of his cigar while he fiddled the leather straps holding his swords in place. He tightened them back up as soon as he had a good scratch.
"And have you die from infection of all things?" Called out the voice of a young man behind him as the clacking of wooden geta hitting the stone deck filled his ear. He glanced towards his back before grinning at the spitting image of himself staring back at him, if only a bit younger, taller, and with slightly softer features.
The young man grinned back as he tossed him a gourd of sake. A mere tap was all he needed to stop it from tumbling down to the ten thousand foot drop ahead. It floated beside him as the young man took a seat to his left. Shiki came prepared as he pulled out two cups just for the occasion. He opened up the bottle and took a whiff before pouring himself a cup. The restrained scent of the clear sake was a treat all on its own.
"Better it itchy than that. Also, didn't I tell you to knock off the cigars? There's a god damn reason your hairline receded." The young man scolded, making him frown as he let out a puff of the harsh acrid smoke. With a heavy sigh, he pulled the cigar off his mouth before tossing it off the edge.
"Does everything good in this world come at a cost?" He lamented out loud, much to the annoyance of the young man as he rolled his eyes at him; cheeky brat. Shiki ran his hair on his thinned, but still luxurious mane of hair. He had bald spots but nothing like having a clear dome atop his head. He was way too old to have his head look like it was shaved.
"Not everything, you can enjoy things in moderation but not cigars. I swear, fucking cancer sticks." The golden haired youth shook his head. Shiki found him too much of a worrywart but that was a good thing considering their profession. Caution was something you couldn't have an overabundance off especially in the high seas.
Shiki tossed the man the other cup before he offered to pour him a drink. The younger man took the offer as he held out the cup with both hands, making sure that he gave him a generous amount before setting the bottle down between them. The boy took his time savoring the scent of his drink before he downed it all down. He offered to give his companion a refill but he simply shook his head as he set his cup down by his side, which had Shiki quirk an eyebrow at. Good sake and not in the drinking mood? Must be something special then.
"So, what brings you to your old man? Nothing as frivolous that trip we had to Skypiea, I hope." He asked as he teased his son on that particular adventure. He gazed up to look at the jagged blacked scar running up and down the trunk of the main mast; the trip had been well worth it.
His son laughed, accepting the ribbing sent his way in good nature as he shook his head before replying, "No, nothing of that kind. I'm just here to say my goodbyes."
Shiki was just about to pour himself another cup when his son dropped that particular bombshell. He glanced back towards his son and noticed the armor he wore on top of his rugged clothing as well as the particular nodachi he had strapped to his back. The boy was serious and he was kitted out for a trip out even in the harshest of weather.
Allowing himself another cup before placing back the cork of the bottle, he gave him his answer, "No, I refuse," Shiki downed the cup and savored its clean and refreshing flavor going down his throat. The only thing missing was some sashimi and he'd have a wonderful time, but not everyone can have everything he supposed.
"Oh come on! I thought you said I was ready," The boy grumbled out as he shook his head in dismay. As much as he might complain, Shiki refused to budge.
"You're still what? Like 16 years old?" He argued, refusing to acknowledge his son's age as he went on his usual spiel, "I'd be an irresponsible parent if I let you on your own at such a young age. Genji, you're my heir, be reasonable here," He stressed out. Shiki had a shitty upbringing and he refused to have his own blood experience it. Making them tough his ass, that was just people's excuse for not being responsible with their own children. One's son or daughter can grow up tough so long as one has a firm but steady hand in rearing them.
"I'm 21 you jackass," Genji shot back and the grin on Shiki's face grew larger. He barked out a laugh as he grabbed the bottle of sake and slipped it in his tattered cloak. He was going to keep this and enjoy it later when his son wasn't around to scold him.
"Eh, way too young. Come back to me when you're a year older," Shiki waved him off as he stuck his pinky in his ears to clean it. He could have said it better and more diplomatically but what was the fun in that? Especially when his son hated being told off.
"You said that last year as well," Genji gritted out through clenched teeth, reminding Shiki of the incident they had last year.
"And I proved you weren't ready when I beat the ever loving crap out of you," Shiki reminded his wayward son as he gazed at him with hardened eyes. The flock of seagulls passing by froze up before they passed out and plummeted down to the clouds below.
"That was last year and you're a year older you rat bastard," Genji met him as his equal as he refused to back down on his own.
"Oho? Looking for a repeat of last year?" Shiki asked as he got up from his perch and rolled his shoulder to limber up. He kicked his feet a bit, letting the sword cut through rock to remind his son who he was facing but he remained unphased as he got up and unslung his own sheathed blade.
"I'm looking for a reversal, this year," His son cockily replied as he walked up to the center of the deck where there was enough space for them to have their little spar.
"Bring it on brat. You're a hundred years too young to beat me!" Shiki snorted in amusement as he followed along, letting him have his moment. He stood there at the center with his boy with only a few dozen paces separating them both. With hands outstretched, he taunted him and dared him to strike him down, "Well, is that all bark and no bite?"
Before he could even think, Shiki bent backwards as the sheathed blade of Genjis's nodachi sailed just above his nose. His bones creaked but he ignored it as he retaliated flipping away from him, letting his twin swords strike upwards. Genji proved just how much faster and youthful he was as he dodged the strike.
"Is that all you got!?" He shouted as he launched himself back at his boy and began their deadly dance. They struck each other but both of them refused to parry the other's strikes as they danced around the flashing blades. His muscle ached at the effort but he could comfortably keep up. He kept low to the ground, grabbing as many things as he could before he made his move.
"Fancy tricks you have there, but unless you have something else, ain't nothing will help you now," Shiki yawned as he had enough. He jumped back and floated away and hovered just out of the boys jump. Shiki gestured down on nearby cannonballs and they started floating upwards. He had the superior attacking angle and his son had no gun on him.
"You haven't seen anything yet!" The youth fired back as Shiki started pelting him with shots. The boy struck out with his sheathed blade, shattering the wrought iron spheres that he couldn't dodge before he did something Shiki only saw the members of a particular government do before; the boy was walking on air. Shiki's eyes widened as the boy started rising up, jumping on top of the things he was throwing down.
His brow twitched as he stopped his barrage and had the leftovers orbit around him, opting to use his pistol instead to attack but his son just proved to be full of surprises. The moment he reached the last cannonball, he jumped off it before he started rising in the air on his own with quick light steps. For a second there, he thought he was kicking rapidly but no, he was merely stepping on air.
Shiki laughed out loudly as his son joined him in the air. Shiki would quickly find that the skies were no longer just his to command as Genji proved himself capable of rising up to meet him eye to eye, "Well I'll be damned, you actually did it!" he cried out in joy as he lashed out at his son with a kick to the face.
"Didn't I tell you to never underestimate me, old man?" His boy laughed out as he parried his strike, pushing him off balance just as a fist came to meet his jaw. Shiki was rattled by the punch but he was made of sterner stuff. He amped up the ante, striking at him with almost indiscriminate fury while tossing in stuff to keep him occupied but the little shit was dodging every attempt he made. Curve balls were sidestepped, boomerangs were ducked under, and attacks from above and below were dodged by jumping to the side and the boy kept on coming. They fought with barely any pause as the sun traveled across the clear blue sky.
The boy was keeping his strikes economical, jabbing at his stomach to drive out the wind out of his lungs whenever the opportunity came up as well as bearing down on him with his weight. The boy was sapping his stamina and he damn well knew it. Shiki was starting to sweat from the effort of having to fight for so long. The sun was starting to set and they had been at it for fucking hours.
"Getting tired old man? You know you can give up," His son taunted him as he bounced around, fresh as daisies while he floated there panting like a geriatric. He really should stop with the cigars like his son recommended him. He shouldn't have been this tired but there he was, sweating like a pig as well.
"I'm merely getting warmed up," He growled out as he launched himself at his boy one last time but his vision doubled and his son smiled. His eyes widened as he found his limbs feeling like lead and his body feeling like it was holding up the weight of the world. He couldn't move and he was powerless to stop his son from finally striking him down. As soon as his son unsheathed his sword, he knew it was over. All he could was brace for impact as his son made his strike.
Blinding pain ripped through his body as the blade connected. It was over in an instant and the next thing he knew, he was inside a small crater in the middle of the deck of his ship. Stone crumbled around him as he tried to force himself up but he could not muster the strength to do so. The large diagonal wound from shoulder to hip did not help but it wasn't as bad as it looked. It barely cut through the skin and the problem he faced now was his sudden lack of strength.
He cursed out as he collapsed back on the crater. He ran his tongue against his teeth and found it numb to pain. "Clever little shit," he cursed out at the tell tale sign of some form of mild paralytic. No wonder the boy chose to drag out the fight.
"Fucking finally and stay down!" His son shouted as he landed with a heavy thud. The boy flicked the blood of his sword before sheathing it. He walked up to him, guarded and with his hands on his weapon despite the state which Shiki found himself in.
"Fuck it, I give." Shiki groaned out as he decided to simply lay there and find a far more comfortable position. He might have been weakened but he could still move.
"Wait, just like that?" The boy asked skeptically and Shiki couldn't help but roll his eyes at him. So melodramatic this one, he blamed the boy's mother for this.
"Fucking hell boy, I know when I'm beat, now help up your old man." He shouted in irritation. He really wanted to get out of this crater because of all the sharp jagged rocks poking his poor back. The boy finally relaxed as his shoulder sagged and his grip left that of his weapon so he could better help Shiki up.
"That is going to leave a mark," He commented as he looked down at the scar his son gave him.
"I'll go call Indigo," Genji offered as he set him down atop an upturned box of cannon balls. He was pulling out a snail dial but Shiki shook it off, refusing to call the doctor when everyone heard their fight.
"Nah, no need. He heard the commotion, he's coming. Just help me tie this up," Shiki shook his head at that as he shakily tore off a piece of his ruined coat. He grimaced at the sound of silk tearing; he really liked this coat but it was well worth the price for what his son managed to achieve today.
He extended his hand and his son gave him the vial of antidote he had along with a bottle of sweetened orange juice, "It'll help you down the damn thing," His son said with a grimace and he barked out a laugh at that. For a boy who had yet to eat his own devil fruit, he sure was cock sure that the liquid inside the vial was vile. He popped off the cork before down it. It was damn bitter but not bad. He only drank the orange juice to help with the shaking.
He sat there as his son started to bandage him with the torn fabric. He stared down at his hand as he clenched and unclenched them without any sign of fatigue. The method he used might have been underhand, but they were god damn pirates and wasn't that poison effective. He didn't even notice it until after the effects started to hit. Insidious little thing, he'd be sure to make use of it in the future.
They sat there in silence as the bleeding was stemmed. Just him and his son as they watched the sunset together. For the first time in so many years, he was beaten and what he felt now lifted the weight bearing down on his shoulder. Twenty years was not spent in vain.
"This brings me back," He sighed out as he reminisced of times long past, of times when he and his rival butted heads with him usually being on the losing end.
"Memories of your gay lover?" His son mouthed off, making him cuff the boy in the back in the head in turn. This boy and his filthy mind, was the youth of this day and age this crude with their humor?
"Oh fuck off you shrimp. Roger had a wife and a child while I have you. I'm more a man than you'll ever be, I fucked your mom!" He hollered out laughing making the boy palm his face. Hah! Two can play at the game he was doing.
"God fucking damn it. That was bad and you should feel bad," The boy snorted out as he looked away with a small smile on his face. Shiki sighed out fondly as he reached out and gave the boy a pat on the back.
"Heh," He snickered out as he reached up for his son's shoulder and gave them a squeeze. The boy turned and looked back at him. Even as a grown man, Shiki couldn't help but see the same old boy that barely reached up to his knees with those old wizened eyes but… the scar on his chest showed him that he was more than just his son now, he had become a man and he was here to see it for himself. "Son, I'm proud of you," He whispered out with a proud smile stretching across his face.
The boy looked at him with surprise before he smiled back and shook his head, "You goddamn sentimental man... Thanks Dad," he replied.
Shiki laughed as he pulled his boy close to his chest, making the smaller man cry out in annoyance, "Now come here and give your old man a hug!" He howled out in laughter as Genji tried to push him off but he underestimated the strength he possessed. He held onto the boy as he ruffled the golden mane atop the youths head. He might be a grown man now but he'd never be too old for a hug from his old man.
"Oh come on! You're covered in blood, It's going to be a pain to wash off my clothes!" The boy protested but Shiki refused to let go. Finally, his son relented and stopped struggling. "… oh fuck it fine," He sighed out as before he finally let him go.
"Raising you was the best plan I ever had. You're the best son a man could hope for," He declared proudly as he stood up with his hands firmly gripping the boy's wrist. The boy looked at him in confusion as he dragged the boy up from his seat and off to the bow of his mighty ship.
"Dad…you're crushing my arm… Dad?" The boy called out in confusion as bewilderment gave way to panic. He tried to pry off the grip he had on his arm but he held on to him with all his strength. He shook his head at how his son failed to notice his plan. He was still young but he'd learn and now he was to impart him an important piece of wisdom.
"Now let this old man give you one last piece of advice," He shouted through the howling wind as the ship plowed into the jetstream up ahead. The ship lurched forward making the boy stumble as he dragged him atop the golden lion head. With him unbalanced, he pulled, bringing the boy above his head as he looked down at the ground shrouded by the clouds below; just as planned, "It ain't over till it's fucking over!" He declared as he tossed him off his ship.
"Mother fucker!" The boy cursed out as his very clothes dragged him down to the ground below. The boy rocketed away, quickly becoming a speck until he couldn't make him out. He laughed out maniacally as he watched the boy disappear from view.
"I'll toss a ship down with your things later! Just survive the landing," He shouted, he was crazy and cruel, yes, but he wasn't a bad father. He would not deprive his son the tools he had intended to use in this journey of his. He also wouldn't toss him somewhere he couldn't survive. The boy would thank him later once he got out of the trouble he'd most certainly land in both figuratively and literally.
Right on cue, the squeaky shoes of his doctor and head scientist could be heard from a distance. He turned and watched as the blue haired clown waddled up to him with a medical kit held atop his head. "Captain! I heard the commotion, is the young master in need of medical assistance?" The man asked as he looked for his son.
"Nah, he's fine. I'm the one that actually needs it." He waved off his concerns before gesturing down on his chest. As good as the blood soaked bandages were in keeping him from bleeding out and staining the deck any further, he'd rather have clean bandages on.
"Wait, he finally did it?" The good doctor sputtered out in surprise as he boggled at the large wound he now sported.
"And I couldn't be any prouder," He declared, a wound of this caliber was something to be celebrated. A shame that he wouldn't be drinking the sake given to him.
"It's finally time, I'll call the crew." The man excitedly whispered as he turned and was about to bolt off. Shiki grabbed the man before he could alert the fleet of their impending sortie back into the Blue Sea below. It was time but he had some plans before committing to that plan.
"Not quite yet. I just need to see what my son will do there. He might not know his role but I've been waiting for twenty long years for this day. Let's see just how much chaos my boy will bring." He told the man before letting him go.
He turned around and walked back to the prow of his ship and savored the salty scent of the sea brought up by the updraft. Today was a special day for today was the day that his son finally set out on his own. The Age of Pirates might have long since started when he and Roger set out to sea but it'll just be as exciting as before, now that his boy was there to mess things up. He spread his arms wide as he grinned out wide.
"Look out Sengoku! My heir has finally arrived! Shihahahah!" He shouted into the wind as the ship plowed ahead with the sun behind its back.
A/N:
You know... I kinda wanted Shiki to be a bit of dick but the more I write this chapter, the more the idea that Shiki's a good father or at least trying his damn best won out. Also, this shows that if you're reborn as a child of one of the big names in One Piece... expect pain, lots of pain.
High up in the clouds, far from the insanity that was the Blue Sea down below, was where Shiki finally retired. The view was amazing up in the sky with nothing but birds and clouds to accompany him. The sound of the wind and the cries of seagulls brought him back and allowed him to reminisce on days gone by.
Don't get him wrong, he was still very much a pirate at heart but without Roger, the seas weren't that interesting. He could have conquered the world but was it even worth it if he had no equal to gloat at? Life was interesting when Roger was around because that man brought out the best in him. He had a dream and that was to wipe the smile off that infuriating mug of his rival but the fucking Marines of all people took that dream away from him.
It wasn't he, Shiki the Flying Pirate that killed Roger, but two faceless men whose sole task was to execute the Pirate King in the weakest sea. It was insulting and down right infuriating that they didn't even have Garp kill him or even one of those rising stars like that mad dog or that cold mother fucker. No, they had to give his rival the most ignoble of deaths and that didn't sit right with him. He took that personally and with that, he'd made the dumbest and most boneheaded move he could have done. Stupid as it may have been, he'd still done it but at least it was over; it'd been twenty years if he remembered correctly.
He scratched his knees while he sat on the edge of the wall surrounding the deck of his ship, "Damn harness' itchy as hell. I miss them being buried in my legs," He grumbled out as he chewed on the butt of his cigar while he fiddled the leather straps holding his swords in place. He tightened them back up as soon as he had a good scratch.
"And have you die from infection of all things?" Called out the voice of a young man behind him as the clacking of wooden geta hitting the stone deck filled his ear. He glanced towards his back before grinning at the spitting image of himself staring back at him, if only a bit younger, taller, and with slightly softer features.
The young man grinned back as he tossed him a gourd of sake. A mere tap was all he needed to stop it from tumbling down to the ten thousand foot drop ahead. It floated beside him as the young man took a seat to his left. Shiki came prepared as he pulled out two cups just for the occasion. He opened up the bottle and took a whiff before pouring himself a cup. The restrained scent of the clear sake was a treat all on its own.
"Better it itchy than that. Also, didn't I tell you to knock off the cigars? There's a god damn reason your hairline receded." The young man scolded, making him frown as he let out a puff of the harsh acrid smoke. With a heavy sigh, he pulled the cigar off his mouth before tossing it off the edge.
"Does everything good in this world come at a cost?" He lamented out loud, much to the annoyance of the young man as he rolled his eyes at him; cheeky brat. Shiki ran his hair on his thinned, but still luxurious mane of hair. He had bald spots but nothing like having a clear dome atop his head. He was way too old to have his head look like it was shaved.
"Not everything, you can enjoy things in moderation but not cigars. I swear, fucking cancer sticks." The golden haired youth shook his head. Shiki found him too much of a worrywart but that was a good thing considering their profession. Caution was something you couldn't have an overabundance off especially in the high seas.
Shiki tossed the man the other cup before he offered to pour him a drink. The younger man took the offer as he held out the cup with both hands, making sure that he gave him a generous amount before setting the bottle down between them. The boy took his time savoring the scent of his drink before he downed it all down. He offered to give his companion a refill but he simply shook his head as he set his cup down by his side, which had Shiki quirk an eyebrow at. Good sake and not in the drinking mood? Must be something special then.
"So, what brings you to your old man? Nothing as frivolous that trip we had to Skypiea, I hope." He asked as he teased his son on that particular adventure. He gazed up to look at the jagged blacked scar running up and down the trunk of the main mast; the trip had been well worth it.
His son laughed, accepting the ribbing sent his way in good nature as he shook his head before replying, "No, nothing of that kind. I'm just here to say my goodbyes."
Shiki was just about to pour himself another cup when his son dropped that particular bombshell. He glanced back towards his son and noticed the armor he wore on top of his rugged clothing as well as the particular nodachi he had strapped to his back. The boy was serious and he was kitted out for a trip out even in the harshest of weather.
Allowing himself another cup before placing back the cork of the bottle, he gave him his answer, "No, I refuse," Shiki downed the cup and savored its clean and refreshing flavor going down his throat. The only thing missing was some sashimi and he'd have a wonderful time, but not everyone can have everything he supposed.
"Oh come on! I thought you said I was ready," The boy grumbled out as he shook his head in dismay. As much as he might complain, Shiki refused to budge.
"You're still what? Like 16 years old?" He argued, refusing to acknowledge his son's age as he went on his usual spiel, "I'd be an irresponsible parent if I let you on your own at such a young age. Genji, you're my heir, be reasonable here," He stressed out. Shiki had a shitty upbringing and he refused to have his own blood experience it. Making them tough his ass, that was just people's excuse for not being responsible with their own children. One's son or daughter can grow up tough so long as one has a firm but steady hand in rearing them.
"I'm 21 you jackass," Genji shot back and the grin on Shiki's face grew larger. He barked out a laugh as he grabbed the bottle of sake and slipped it in his tattered cloak. He was going to keep this and enjoy it later when his son wasn't around to scold him.
"Eh, way too young. Come back to me when you're a year older," Shiki waved him off as he stuck his pinky in his ears to clean it. He could have said it better and more diplomatically but what was the fun in that? Especially when his son hated being told off.
"You said that last year as well," Genji gritted out through clenched teeth, reminding Shiki of the incident they had last year.
"And I proved you weren't ready when I beat the ever loving crap out of you," Shiki reminded his wayward son as he gazed at him with hardened eyes. The flock of seagulls passing by froze up before they passed out and plummeted down to the clouds below.
"That was last year and you're a year older you rat bastard," Genji met him as his equal as he refused to back down on his own.
"Oho? Looking for a repeat of last year?" Shiki asked as he got up from his perch and rolled his shoulder to limber up. He kicked his feet a bit, letting the sword cut through rock to remind his son who he was facing but he remained unphased as he got up and unslung his own sheathed blade.
"I'm looking for a reversal, this year," His son cockily replied as he walked up to the center of the deck where there was enough space for them to have their little spar.
"Bring it on brat. You're a hundred years too young to beat me!" Shiki snorted in amusement as he followed along, letting him have his moment. He stood there at the center with his boy with only a few dozen paces separating them both. With hands outstretched, he taunted him and dared him to strike him down, "Well, is that all bark and no bite?"
Before he could even think, Shiki bent backwards as the sheathed blade of Genjis's nodachi sailed just above his nose. His bones creaked but he ignored it as he retaliated flipping away from him, letting his twin swords strike upwards. Genji proved just how much faster and youthful he was as he dodged the strike.
"Is that all you got!?" He shouted as he launched himself back at his boy and began their deadly dance. They struck each other but both of them refused to parry the other's strikes as they danced around the flashing blades. His muscle ached at the effort but he could comfortably keep up. He kept low to the ground, grabbing as many things as he could before he made his move.
"Fancy tricks you have there, but unless you have something else, ain't nothing will help you now," Shiki yawned as he had enough. He jumped back and floated away and hovered just out of the boys jump. Shiki gestured down on nearby cannonballs and they started floating upwards. He had the superior attacking angle and his son had no gun on him.
"You haven't seen anything yet!" The youth fired back as Shiki started pelting him with shots. The boy struck out with his sheathed blade, shattering the wrought iron spheres that he couldn't dodge before he did something Shiki only saw the members of a particular government do before; the boy was walking on air. Shiki's eyes widened as the boy started rising up, jumping on top of the things he was throwing down.
His brow twitched as he stopped his barrage and had the leftovers orbit around him, opting to use his pistol instead to attack but his son just proved to be full of surprises. The moment he reached the last cannonball, he jumped off it before he started rising in the air on his own with quick light steps. For a second there, he thought he was kicking rapidly but no, he was merely stepping on air.
Shiki laughed out loudly as his son joined him in the air. Shiki would quickly find that the skies were no longer just his to command as Genji proved himself capable of rising up to meet him eye to eye, "Well I'll be damned, you actually did it!" he cried out in joy as he lashed out at his son with a kick to the face.
"Didn't I tell you to never underestimate me, old man?" His boy laughed out as he parried his strike, pushing him off balance just as a fist came to meet his jaw. Shiki was rattled by the punch but he was made of sterner stuff. He amped up the ante, striking at him with almost indiscriminate fury while tossing in stuff to keep him occupied but the little shit was dodging every attempt he made. Curve balls were sidestepped, boomerangs were ducked under, and attacks from above and below were dodged by jumping to the side and the boy kept on coming. They fought with barely any pause as the sun traveled across the clear blue sky.
The boy was keeping his strikes economical, jabbing at his stomach to drive out the wind out of his lungs whenever the opportunity came up as well as bearing down on him with his weight. The boy was sapping his stamina and he damn well knew it. Shiki was starting to sweat from the effort of having to fight for so long. The sun was starting to set and they had been at it for fucking hours.
"Getting tired old man? You know you can give up," His son taunted him as he bounced around, fresh as daisies while he floated there panting like a geriatric. He really should stop with the cigars like his son recommended him. He shouldn't have been this tired but there he was, sweating like a pig as well.
"I'm merely getting warmed up," He growled out as he launched himself at his boy one last time but his vision doubled and his son smiled. His eyes widened as he found his limbs feeling like lead and his body feeling like it was holding up the weight of the world. He couldn't move and he was powerless to stop his son from finally striking him down. As soon as his son unsheathed his sword, he knew it was over. All he could was brace for impact as his son made his strike.
Blinding pain ripped through his body as the blade connected. It was over in an instant and the next thing he knew, he was inside a small crater in the middle of the deck of his ship. Stone crumbled around him as he tried to force himself up but he could not muster the strength to do so. The large diagonal wound from shoulder to hip did not help but it wasn't as bad as it looked. It barely cut through the skin and the problem he faced now was his sudden lack of strength.
He cursed out as he collapsed back on the crater. He ran his tongue against his teeth and found it numb to pain. "Clever little shit," he cursed out at the tell tale sign of some form of mild paralytic. No wonder the boy chose to drag out the fight.
"Fucking finally and stay down!" His son shouted as he landed with a heavy thud. The boy flicked the blood of his sword before sheathing it. He walked up to him, guarded and with his hands on his weapon despite the state which Shiki found himself in.
"Fuck it, I give." Shiki groaned out as he decided to simply lay there and find a far more comfortable position. He might have been weakened but he could still move.
"Wait, just like that?" The boy asked skeptically and Shiki couldn't help but roll his eyes at him. So melodramatic this one, he blamed the boy's mother for this.
"Fucking hell boy, I know when I'm beat, now help up your old man." He shouted in irritation. He really wanted to get out of this crater because of all the sharp jagged rocks poking his poor back. The boy finally relaxed as his shoulder sagged and his grip left that of his weapon so he could better help Shiki up.
"That is going to leave a mark," He commented as he looked down at the scar his son gave him.
"I'll go call Indigo," Genji offered as he set him down atop an upturned box of cannon balls. He was pulling out a snail dial but Shiki shook it off, refusing to call the doctor when everyone heard their fight.
"Nah, no need. He heard the commotion, he's coming. Just help me tie this up," Shiki shook his head at that as he shakily tore off a piece of his ruined coat. He grimaced at the sound of silk tearing; he really liked this coat but it was well worth the price for what his son managed to achieve today.
He extended his hand and his son gave him the vial of antidote he had along with a bottle of sweetened orange juice, "It'll help you down the damn thing," His son said with a grimace and he barked out a laugh at that. For a boy who had yet to eat his own devil fruit, he sure was cock sure that the liquid inside the vial was vile. He popped off the cork before down it. It was damn bitter but not bad. He only drank the orange juice to help with the shaking.
He sat there as his son started to bandage him with the torn fabric. He stared down at his hand as he clenched and unclenched them without any sign of fatigue. The method he used might have been underhand, but they were god damn pirates and wasn't that poison effective. He didn't even notice it until after the effects started to hit. Insidious little thing, he'd be sure to make use of it in the future.
They sat there in silence as the bleeding was stemmed. Just him and his son as they watched the sunset together. For the first time in so many years, he was beaten and what he felt now lifted the weight bearing down on his shoulder. Twenty years was not spent in vain.
"This brings me back," He sighed out as he reminisced of times long past, of times when he and his rival butted heads with him usually being on the losing end.
"Memories of your gay lover?" His son mouthed off, making him cuff the boy in the back in the head in turn. This boy and his filthy mind, was the youth of this day and age this crude with their humor?
"Oh fuck off you shrimp. Roger had a wife and a child while I have you. I'm more a man than you'll ever be, I fucked your mom!" He hollered out laughing making the boy palm his face. Hah! Two can play at the game he was doing.
"God fucking damn it. That was bad and you should feel bad," The boy snorted out as he looked away with a small smile on his face. Shiki sighed out fondly as he reached out and gave the boy a pat on the back.
"Heh," He snickered out as he reached up for his son's shoulder and gave them a squeeze. The boy turned and looked back at him. Even as a grown man, Shiki couldn't help but see the same old boy that barely reached up to his knees with those old wizened eyes but… the scar on his chest showed him that he was more than just his son now, he had become a man and he was here to see it for himself. "Son, I'm proud of you," He whispered out with a proud smile stretching across his face.
The boy looked at him with surprise before he smiled back and shook his head, "You goddamn sentimental man... Thanks Dad," he replied.
Shiki laughed as he pulled his boy close to his chest, making the smaller man cry out in annoyance, "Now come here and give your old man a hug!" He howled out in laughter as Genji tried to push him off but he underestimated the strength he possessed. He held onto the boy as he ruffled the golden mane atop the youths head. He might be a grown man now but he'd never be too old for a hug from his old man.
"Oh come on! You're covered in blood, It's going to be a pain to wash off my clothes!" The boy protested but Shiki refused to let go. Finally, his son relented and stopped struggling. "… oh fuck it fine," He sighed out as before he finally let him go.
"Raising you was the best plan I ever had. You're the best son a man could hope for," He declared proudly as he stood up with his hands firmly gripping the boy's wrist. The boy looked at him in confusion as he dragged the boy up from his seat and off to the bow of his mighty ship.
"Dad…you're crushing my arm… Dad?" The boy called out in confusion as bewilderment gave way to panic. He tried to pry off the grip he had on his arm but he held on to him with all his strength. He shook his head at how his son failed to notice his plan. He was still young but he'd learn and now he was to impart him an important piece of wisdom.
"Now let this old man give you one last piece of advice," He shouted through the howling wind as the ship plowed into the jetstream up ahead. The ship lurched forward making the boy stumble as he dragged him atop the golden lion head. With him unbalanced, he pulled, bringing the boy above his head as he looked down at the ground shrouded by the clouds below; just as planned, "It ain't over till it's fucking over!" He declared as he tossed him off his ship.
"Mother fucker!" The boy cursed out as his very clothes dragged him down to the ground below. The boy rocketed away, quickly becoming a speck until he couldn't make him out. He laughed out maniacally as he watched the boy disappear from view.
"I'll toss a ship down with your things later! Just survive the landing," He shouted, he was crazy and cruel, yes, but he wasn't a bad father. He would not deprive his son the tools he had intended to use in this journey of his. He also wouldn't toss him somewhere he couldn't survive. The boy would thank him later once he got out of the trouble he'd most certainly land in both figuratively and literally.
Right on cue, the squeaky shoes of his doctor and head scientist could be heard from a distance. He turned and watched as the blue haired clown waddled up to him with a medical kit held atop his head. "Captain! I heard the commotion, is the young master in need of medical assistance?" The man asked as he looked for his son.
"Nah, he's fine. I'm the one that actually needs it." He waved off his concerns before gesturing down on his chest. As good as the blood soaked bandages were in keeping him from bleeding out and staining the deck any further, he'd rather have clean bandages on.
"Wait, he finally did it?" The good doctor sputtered out in surprise as he boggled at the large wound he now sported.
"And I couldn't be any prouder," He declared, a wound of this caliber was something to be celebrated. A shame that he wouldn't be drinking the sake given to him.
"It's finally time, I'll call the crew." The man excitedly whispered as he turned and was about to bolt off. Shiki grabbed the man before he could alert the fleet of their impending sortie back into the Blue Sea below. It was time but he had some plans before committing to that plan.
"Not quite yet. I just need to see what my son will do there. He might not know his role but I've been waiting for twenty long years for this day. Let's see just how much chaos my boy will bring." He told the man before letting him go.
He turned around and walked back to the prow of his ship and savored the salty scent of the sea brought up by the updraft. Today was a special day for today was the day that his son finally set out on his own. The Age of Pirates might have long since started when he and Roger set out to sea but it'll just be as exciting as before, now that his boy was there to mess things up. He spread his arms wide as he grinned out wide.
"Look out Sengoku! My heir has finally arrived! Shihahahah!" He shouted into the wind as the ship plowed ahead with the sun behind its back.
A/N:
You know... I kinda wanted Shiki to be a bit of dick but the more I write this chapter, the more the idea that Shiki's a good father or at least trying his damn best won out. Also, this shows that if you're reborn as a child of one of the big names in One Piece... expect pain, lots of pain.
My Lovely Rose: Prologue [Harley Quinn Show Ivy SI-ish]
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
One Bad Trip
When Ivy took in her best friend Harley after a particularly nasty break up with her "Puddin'~", she expected some headaches. It was after all unavoidable considering how crazy Harley could be at times. It was actually a miracle how they got along, but the world had a funny way of bringing people together. Still, as much as she loved the adorably misguided firebrand of a psychiatrist that she called her bestie, Harley could sometimes get on her nerves; like how her morning started.
Ivy yawned as she lazed on her coach while she watched the morning news. Her hair was still a mess and she was still using her oversized shirt she called her pajamas, but it's not like she had anything planned today. There was also the fact that they ran out of shampoo but she could always mix something up later. For now, she just wanted to relax and that was what she did.
She stared unseeingly at the screen while the droning of the tv reporter went over her head as she drank her cup of apple peel tea. The aroma of the spices, mixed in with the flavor of the fruit and the sweetness of honey helped her relax so she could start her day as fresh as a daisy.
She was in bliss, free from distraction and thought, until her peace was shattered, "Gooood morning sleepyhead! I bought groceries~!" Shouted her ever so lovable, if rather loud, temporary roommate, Harley as Ivy heard her kick the door open. Ivy cringed at how loud the door banged against the wall and she wouldn't be surprised if it was cracked.
Ivy closed her eyes and counted down from 10 and begged that she didn't dent the metal door before she turned around and found herself face to face with the grinning face of her best friend, smiling softly as she shook her head at the girl, "Harley, you know we have neighbors and it's not that late," She reminded her as she reached up to give her a pat.
"It's 9 am already Pam!~ You know most of them have already gone to work or are just preparing to go to sleep so it's fine!" Harley replied as she stuck out her tongue at her. Ivy flicked her on the forehead making the girl stumble back in surprise before pouting at her.
She rolled her eyes at her as she scolded her slightly, "Bad Harley. You really want me to get in trouble with my landlord?"
"Poison Ivy? Worried about your landlord? And they say I'm the comedian here," Harley snarked out with a grin as she walked up behind Ivy and wrapped her arms around her.
Ivy chuckled as she leaned back against the girl's hold. It was quite funny how she, Poison Ivy, villain extraordinaire was renting out an apartment. Then again, she did have a hard time getting legitimate cash flow and asking a bank you robbed a few weeks earlier to fund one of your research projects or schemes does not go too well. So here she was, in a simple, but quite spacious, apartment surrounded by her plants.
"So, want me to cook breakfast?" Harley then asked. Ivy's empty stomach grumbling reminded her that she had yet to eat.
"You did buy from the family down the street right? I love the eggs their chickens produce and their apples are the best," Ivy asked. While she did disapprove of some of their choices for crops, like carrots and cabbages, she reluctantly let that issue go as they were a net positive with their urban farming in Gotham. Anything that could make a dent in the smog of Gotham was a net positive really.
"Of course! You know how you had me hooked with their produce thanks to their juicy zucchinis!" Harley replied with a cheer as she pulled away and skipped to their kitchen. Just as she heard the woman turn on the kitchen hood, she heard Harley shout out. "By the way! I
bought some replacement shampoo. We're running a little low so I dropped by the local supermarket."
"Shampoo… wait, did Harley just say the supermarket? You know I make my own… " but her words were drowned out by the loud fan and music that Harley was blasting in the kitchen. IIvy frowned as she got off her seat and headed for the kitchen. There, she'd find Ivy preparing a fruit salad, with the blonde carefully separating the more mature seeds so Ivy could use them later, while the pan was heating up. Sitting on the countertop was the produce she bought from the nearby organic farm along with some innocent looking paper bags.
She grimaced as she approached the groceries and started rifling through them. There was a bottle of avocado oil, some dried tropical fruits imported from… Sri Lanka if her powers were correct, as well as the bottle of shampoo that Harley mentioned. Picking up the bottle, she turned it around and inspected the ingredients. The all natural claims in the packaging did not fill her confidence one bit before she scowled at the list of ingredients.
"Palm Oil? Palm Oil!? Harley!" She growled out as she turned to the girl who flinched and almost dropped the pan just as she was cooking some eggs. "You fucking know well they burn entire forest to make those mono culture monstrosities! How can you fucking do this!" She shouted as slammed the bottle on the counter before using a vine to close the music app Harley had on her opened in her phone. She almost chucked it at the window if it wasn't for the fact that she'd waste all that oil harvested from those tortured plants.
Ivy blushed in shame as she shrunk away at her scorn. Good, she knew damn well what she did and she should be ashamed. "W-Well! I need to take care of my hair damn it and I picked the wrong shampoo. Give me a break here Pam, it's not like there's any easy to get alternatives that do not contain fucking palm oil here in Gotham!" The girl then fired back as shame turned to indignation.
Ivy took in a deep breath and puckered her lips at the gal. They wouldn't even be in this situation if she didn't use up her shampoo! Like, who uses that much shampoo!? "If you didn't use up shampoo like crazy then this wouldn't be a thing! I haven't taken a bath thanks to just how you used up in the past week!" Ivy screamed and Ivy squawked out in anger.
"I was trying to be considerate here! I didn't know that you would overreact-" Harley tried making excuses but Ivy was not having any of it as she hushed the girl. Ivy gritted her teeth as she desperately tried not to break the bottle of shampoo clutched in her hands.
"Overreact!? I have the right to overreact with the environmental destruction caused by this product!" Ivy snapped out as she shoved the bottle on Harley's chest. Harley stared at her with mouth agape while Ivy took deep calming breaths as she paced around.
"You are insufferable!" Harley shrieked out as he tossed the bottle on the trash can before pulling at her hair in frustration.
"And you are an immature, ungrateful brat!" Harley yelled back at her as he jabbed her finger at her chest. She took her in when she needed it and this was how she was going to repay her? She faltered a bit as Harley stepped back with eyes brimming with tears.
The ugly feeling of shame welled up Ivy's chest but she pushed it back down as she looked away from Harley. This was Harley's fault, not hers. She should have known better. She should have been more considerate to her.
Big fat tears fell down Harley's cheeks as the girl wiped them off. "... Fine! Have it your way! I'm leaving!" the girl shouted as she ran off crying to her bedroom. Ivy flinched as the girl slammed the door close behind her leaving her there in the kitchen all alone.
She tried reasoning to herself that she was in the right, that she wasn't being the asshole here but her traitorous heart did not listen to her. "Fucking damn it…" she gritted out before she noticed the smell of something burning and found the eggs burning in the pan. She cursed out as she tried salvaging the food but in the end, she ended up having to eat quartered fruits and burnt eggs for breakfast.
Harley still hasn't come out of her room and Ivy was in no mood to go out so she ended up just holing up in her own room, the normally spacious place stuffed with boxes that she had kept inside Harley's room before she moved in. It wasn't much, just an assortment of stuff she had from her old university before she killed that pig.
She sighed as gazed over at the clipboard she would have used in teaching sustainability and the importance of the environment. She would have loved to have Harley as a colleague or maybe even just her psychiatrist if their lives were a bit more normal. She groaned out as the intrusive thoughts about her roommate came creeping in. She hated how Harley could just live in her mind rent free. She was already living in her apartment rent free!
Frustrated at the situation, she decided to get up and start arranging things to clear her mind. She had a lot of things she had tossed in boxes she never got around to fixing. She needed to sort them out anyways so might as well.
As she was rummaging through her old stuff and tossing out things that she wouldn't need, she came across her old bag of goodies from her freshman days. Seeing the bag of magic mushrooms brought out memories of her when she was so young and naive. Surprisingly, the shrooms looked as good as the day she zipped them up in a plastic bag.
She hummed as she opened the bag and stared into the dried mushrooms. She probably shouldn't, but she didn't have any stocked up elsewhere and she desperately needed to unwind so she shrugged as she popped them in her mouth before going off to bed. She should probably have asked someone to babysit her and it'd been a while since she'd gotten high, but it was only a handful compared to the amount she used to take back then. With her choice of music on, she tossed herself on the bed.
As soon as she plopped down, things started getting weird as she started sinking into her bed. "What the fu- oh shit!" She shouted in alarm only to find herself losing purchase in the soft silk of her bed. She scrambled against her coverers as she sank in further in her bed, desperately trying to fight the sucking force from beneath her while her powers remained dormant.
Panic quickly set in as she sank down to her chest and was quickly sinking. What's worse was that she was shrinking as the bed stretched on and on while the walls shot up high till she could no longer see the ceiling. Colors bled away from objects as if they were watering washing of objects while the sound started getting distorted and twisted. With options running out, she caved in and finally called for the one person that could help her.
"Harley! Harleeyyy!" She screamed out even as her voice stretched out to infinity with echoes resounding across the four corners of her walls. The last thing she saw as she fully sunk was the tear streaked and panicked look of Harley as she reached out for her hand. She grabbed hold but her grip quickly slipped as she tumbled down into the screaming eternity between space.
She blinked as she awoke in another life and in another world as life passed by her eyes. Memories from two lives collided as she relieved another life with loving parents and a peaceful picturesque life. It was boring yet there were no powers, no magic, just humans living their lives till it ended. In this fevered dream, she merely watched along as if watching a movie through another's eyes and felt the crushing loneliness as eternity passed by inside her head and how her body reached out for companionship only to find it in screens.
What's weirder was that she found her life, or maybe multiple instances of her life, in the form of media being told and retold a hundred times. Her life and those she knew were nothing more than a story to be told for the entertainment of everyone. From reasonable to insane, she watched her life over and over again and even wrote new instances of them but one constant remained in those lives and that was Harley being there for her. She blinked back tears as she felt decades slip by with life passing by until it ended as soon as it began. She opened her eyes screaming as she found herself back to reality with Harley holding her down.
"Oh god! Ivy! I thought you were dying! You were shaking and your mouth was foaming and I didn't know what to do! I didn't even know if 911 would be able to help since you're more plant than human!" Harley bawled out as Ivy found herself crushed by the girl's arms. She felt her bones creak in protest but the pain reminded her that she was still alive and well, that everything was now ok as things had returned back to the way they were. She clung onto Harley as tears started streaming down her cheeks.
"Harley, oh Harley I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have said those words. I was being mean and irrational and-" Ivy babbled out before she let out an ugly cry with big fat tears of her own. She was shaking and breathless from the experience. Was her life just merely an illusion? Was it just merely a story? She didn't know and she was afraid to answer it.
"I should be the one apologizing here! Why did you take those shrooms without me!? We could have had a journey together." Harley whined out making Harley snort out and laugh at the absurdity of her statement. Ivy tapped on the girl's back and she was finally allowed to breathe. Laying down, Harley made her rest her head on her lap.
"Harley, you wouldn't have liked being on that trip. It was awful. It felt like I lived another life and saw our lives as stories. You wouldn't believe half the things I saw," Ivy replied as she wiped away the tears while laughing shakily. She let out a sigh of comfort as she felt Harley combing her hair as she had her head rested on the pale girl's thigh.
"Oh?" Harley asked, lending her ears to her as Ivy blabbered away.
"Yeah, I saw Bruce Wayne as Batman and Superman being a random reporter from the Daily Planet. Can you believe that?" Ivy snorted out in amusement. Bruce Wayne, the biggest Playboy Philanthropist there ever was in Gotham being the hardened and scary Batman? She could hardly believe the guy had the guts to hurt a fly. He looked like a big softie much like that reporter from Daily Planet.
"Awww, I missed out then," Harley complained with a pout making Ivy chuckle. "Say, did you see us together there?" She then asked, smiling hopefully at her. Her memories came flooding in, instances of them making out, countless stories of them being a couple, and an untold number of fanarts of the two screwing each other came flooding in. She felt her cheeks turn dark green at the thought. She knew she and Harley were hot but how much could the internet thirst for them and have them together?! As couples even! They were friends… though she wouldn't mind having Harley as a girlfriend.
Harley screamed out inside her head yet kept her expression as calm and collected as she could even after she had just bawled her eyes out, "Y-yeah… and every single instance we were friends," She whispered back as she tried to still her beating heart at the sight of the beautiful smile on Harley's face. She could lose herself just staring into those big baby blue eyes of hers.
"Besties for life!" Harley cheered as she pulled her close to her rather busty chest and Ivy's mind stuttered for a bit while she processed just what happened. Thankfully, she didn't suffocate as Harley pulled her away just in time to allow her to breath.
Y-yeah, besties for life," Ivy replied with a shaky smile. Her thoughts and feeling warred inside her and how she really felt about Harley but one thing was sure about what she felt and that was she didn't want to loose Harley as someone close to her and she needed get her head out of her ass and apologize
"Hey Harley, want to go out shopping?" Ivy asked before she added "I'm really sorry about earlier and I was being a shitty friend. I know it doesn't mean much but I could fork in a few hundred dollars?" She's probably going to regret it, but seeing that goofy smile on Harley was worth it. Next thing she knew, she was pushed into the bath being ordered to hurry up. Well, who was she to say no to that; especially when it felt like she was going to have a great day ahead.
A/N:
So Ivy gets to live another life and comes out a bit wiser from it. She spent nearly 25 years out there and now she's back a bit more mellow. I think that Gotham is not ready for what's to come lol. Also, poor wallet doesn't know what's about to hit it.
When Ivy took in her best friend Harley after a particularly nasty break up with her "Puddin'~", she expected some headaches. It was after all unavoidable considering how crazy Harley could be at times. It was actually a miracle how they got along, but the world had a funny way of bringing people together. Still, as much as she loved the adorably misguided firebrand of a psychiatrist that she called her bestie, Harley could sometimes get on her nerves; like how her morning started.
Ivy yawned as she lazed on her coach while she watched the morning news. Her hair was still a mess and she was still using her oversized shirt she called her pajamas, but it's not like she had anything planned today. There was also the fact that they ran out of shampoo but she could always mix something up later. For now, she just wanted to relax and that was what she did.
She stared unseeingly at the screen while the droning of the tv reporter went over her head as she drank her cup of apple peel tea. The aroma of the spices, mixed in with the flavor of the fruit and the sweetness of honey helped her relax so she could start her day as fresh as a daisy.
She was in bliss, free from distraction and thought, until her peace was shattered, "Gooood morning sleepyhead! I bought groceries~!" Shouted her ever so lovable, if rather loud, temporary roommate, Harley as Ivy heard her kick the door open. Ivy cringed at how loud the door banged against the wall and she wouldn't be surprised if it was cracked.
Ivy closed her eyes and counted down from 10 and begged that she didn't dent the metal door before she turned around and found herself face to face with the grinning face of her best friend, smiling softly as she shook her head at the girl, "Harley, you know we have neighbors and it's not that late," She reminded her as she reached up to give her a pat.
"It's 9 am already Pam!~ You know most of them have already gone to work or are just preparing to go to sleep so it's fine!" Harley replied as she stuck out her tongue at her. Ivy flicked her on the forehead making the girl stumble back in surprise before pouting at her.
She rolled her eyes at her as she scolded her slightly, "Bad Harley. You really want me to get in trouble with my landlord?"
"Poison Ivy? Worried about your landlord? And they say I'm the comedian here," Harley snarked out with a grin as she walked up behind Ivy and wrapped her arms around her.
Ivy chuckled as she leaned back against the girl's hold. It was quite funny how she, Poison Ivy, villain extraordinaire was renting out an apartment. Then again, she did have a hard time getting legitimate cash flow and asking a bank you robbed a few weeks earlier to fund one of your research projects or schemes does not go too well. So here she was, in a simple, but quite spacious, apartment surrounded by her plants.
"So, want me to cook breakfast?" Harley then asked. Ivy's empty stomach grumbling reminded her that she had yet to eat.
"You did buy from the family down the street right? I love the eggs their chickens produce and their apples are the best," Ivy asked. While she did disapprove of some of their choices for crops, like carrots and cabbages, she reluctantly let that issue go as they were a net positive with their urban farming in Gotham. Anything that could make a dent in the smog of Gotham was a net positive really.
"Of course! You know how you had me hooked with their produce thanks to their juicy zucchinis!" Harley replied with a cheer as she pulled away and skipped to their kitchen. Just as she heard the woman turn on the kitchen hood, she heard Harley shout out. "By the way! I
bought some replacement shampoo. We're running a little low so I dropped by the local supermarket."
"Shampoo… wait, did Harley just say the supermarket? You know I make my own… " but her words were drowned out by the loud fan and music that Harley was blasting in the kitchen. IIvy frowned as she got off her seat and headed for the kitchen. There, she'd find Ivy preparing a fruit salad, with the blonde carefully separating the more mature seeds so Ivy could use them later, while the pan was heating up. Sitting on the countertop was the produce she bought from the nearby organic farm along with some innocent looking paper bags.
She grimaced as she approached the groceries and started rifling through them. There was a bottle of avocado oil, some dried tropical fruits imported from… Sri Lanka if her powers were correct, as well as the bottle of shampoo that Harley mentioned. Picking up the bottle, she turned it around and inspected the ingredients. The all natural claims in the packaging did not fill her confidence one bit before she scowled at the list of ingredients.
"Palm Oil? Palm Oil!? Harley!" She growled out as she turned to the girl who flinched and almost dropped the pan just as she was cooking some eggs. "You fucking know well they burn entire forest to make those mono culture monstrosities! How can you fucking do this!" She shouted as slammed the bottle on the counter before using a vine to close the music app Harley had on her opened in her phone. She almost chucked it at the window if it wasn't for the fact that she'd waste all that oil harvested from those tortured plants.
Ivy blushed in shame as she shrunk away at her scorn. Good, she knew damn well what she did and she should be ashamed. "W-Well! I need to take care of my hair damn it and I picked the wrong shampoo. Give me a break here Pam, it's not like there's any easy to get alternatives that do not contain fucking palm oil here in Gotham!" The girl then fired back as shame turned to indignation.
Ivy took in a deep breath and puckered her lips at the gal. They wouldn't even be in this situation if she didn't use up her shampoo! Like, who uses that much shampoo!? "If you didn't use up shampoo like crazy then this wouldn't be a thing! I haven't taken a bath thanks to just how you used up in the past week!" Ivy screamed and Ivy squawked out in anger.
"I was trying to be considerate here! I didn't know that you would overreact-" Harley tried making excuses but Ivy was not having any of it as she hushed the girl. Ivy gritted her teeth as she desperately tried not to break the bottle of shampoo clutched in her hands.
"Overreact!? I have the right to overreact with the environmental destruction caused by this product!" Ivy snapped out as she shoved the bottle on Harley's chest. Harley stared at her with mouth agape while Ivy took deep calming breaths as she paced around.
"You are insufferable!" Harley shrieked out as he tossed the bottle on the trash can before pulling at her hair in frustration.
"And you are an immature, ungrateful brat!" Harley yelled back at her as he jabbed her finger at her chest. She took her in when she needed it and this was how she was going to repay her? She faltered a bit as Harley stepped back with eyes brimming with tears.
The ugly feeling of shame welled up Ivy's chest but she pushed it back down as she looked away from Harley. This was Harley's fault, not hers. She should have known better. She should have been more considerate to her.
Big fat tears fell down Harley's cheeks as the girl wiped them off. "... Fine! Have it your way! I'm leaving!" the girl shouted as she ran off crying to her bedroom. Ivy flinched as the girl slammed the door close behind her leaving her there in the kitchen all alone.
She tried reasoning to herself that she was in the right, that she wasn't being the asshole here but her traitorous heart did not listen to her. "Fucking damn it…" she gritted out before she noticed the smell of something burning and found the eggs burning in the pan. She cursed out as she tried salvaging the food but in the end, she ended up having to eat quartered fruits and burnt eggs for breakfast.
Harley still hasn't come out of her room and Ivy was in no mood to go out so she ended up just holing up in her own room, the normally spacious place stuffed with boxes that she had kept inside Harley's room before she moved in. It wasn't much, just an assortment of stuff she had from her old university before she killed that pig.
She sighed as gazed over at the clipboard she would have used in teaching sustainability and the importance of the environment. She would have loved to have Harley as a colleague or maybe even just her psychiatrist if their lives were a bit more normal. She groaned out as the intrusive thoughts about her roommate came creeping in. She hated how Harley could just live in her mind rent free. She was already living in her apartment rent free!
Frustrated at the situation, she decided to get up and start arranging things to clear her mind. She had a lot of things she had tossed in boxes she never got around to fixing. She needed to sort them out anyways so might as well.
As she was rummaging through her old stuff and tossing out things that she wouldn't need, she came across her old bag of goodies from her freshman days. Seeing the bag of magic mushrooms brought out memories of her when she was so young and naive. Surprisingly, the shrooms looked as good as the day she zipped them up in a plastic bag.
She hummed as she opened the bag and stared into the dried mushrooms. She probably shouldn't, but she didn't have any stocked up elsewhere and she desperately needed to unwind so she shrugged as she popped them in her mouth before going off to bed. She should probably have asked someone to babysit her and it'd been a while since she'd gotten high, but it was only a handful compared to the amount she used to take back then. With her choice of music on, she tossed herself on the bed.
As soon as she plopped down, things started getting weird as she started sinking into her bed. "What the fu- oh shit!" She shouted in alarm only to find herself losing purchase in the soft silk of her bed. She scrambled against her coverers as she sank in further in her bed, desperately trying to fight the sucking force from beneath her while her powers remained dormant.
Panic quickly set in as she sank down to her chest and was quickly sinking. What's worse was that she was shrinking as the bed stretched on and on while the walls shot up high till she could no longer see the ceiling. Colors bled away from objects as if they were watering washing of objects while the sound started getting distorted and twisted. With options running out, she caved in and finally called for the one person that could help her.
"Harley! Harleeyyy!" She screamed out even as her voice stretched out to infinity with echoes resounding across the four corners of her walls. The last thing she saw as she fully sunk was the tear streaked and panicked look of Harley as she reached out for her hand. She grabbed hold but her grip quickly slipped as she tumbled down into the screaming eternity between space.
She blinked as she awoke in another life and in another world as life passed by her eyes. Memories from two lives collided as she relieved another life with loving parents and a peaceful picturesque life. It was boring yet there were no powers, no magic, just humans living their lives till it ended. In this fevered dream, she merely watched along as if watching a movie through another's eyes and felt the crushing loneliness as eternity passed by inside her head and how her body reached out for companionship only to find it in screens.
What's weirder was that she found her life, or maybe multiple instances of her life, in the form of media being told and retold a hundred times. Her life and those she knew were nothing more than a story to be told for the entertainment of everyone. From reasonable to insane, she watched her life over and over again and even wrote new instances of them but one constant remained in those lives and that was Harley being there for her. She blinked back tears as she felt decades slip by with life passing by until it ended as soon as it began. She opened her eyes screaming as she found herself back to reality with Harley holding her down.
"Oh god! Ivy! I thought you were dying! You were shaking and your mouth was foaming and I didn't know what to do! I didn't even know if 911 would be able to help since you're more plant than human!" Harley bawled out as Ivy found herself crushed by the girl's arms. She felt her bones creak in protest but the pain reminded her that she was still alive and well, that everything was now ok as things had returned back to the way they were. She clung onto Harley as tears started streaming down her cheeks.
"Harley, oh Harley I'm so sorry! I shouldn't have said those words. I was being mean and irrational and-" Ivy babbled out before she let out an ugly cry with big fat tears of her own. She was shaking and breathless from the experience. Was her life just merely an illusion? Was it just merely a story? She didn't know and she was afraid to answer it.
"I should be the one apologizing here! Why did you take those shrooms without me!? We could have had a journey together." Harley whined out making Harley snort out and laugh at the absurdity of her statement. Ivy tapped on the girl's back and she was finally allowed to breathe. Laying down, Harley made her rest her head on her lap.
"Harley, you wouldn't have liked being on that trip. It was awful. It felt like I lived another life and saw our lives as stories. You wouldn't believe half the things I saw," Ivy replied as she wiped away the tears while laughing shakily. She let out a sigh of comfort as she felt Harley combing her hair as she had her head rested on the pale girl's thigh.
"Oh?" Harley asked, lending her ears to her as Ivy blabbered away.
"Yeah, I saw Bruce Wayne as Batman and Superman being a random reporter from the Daily Planet. Can you believe that?" Ivy snorted out in amusement. Bruce Wayne, the biggest Playboy Philanthropist there ever was in Gotham being the hardened and scary Batman? She could hardly believe the guy had the guts to hurt a fly. He looked like a big softie much like that reporter from Daily Planet.
"Awww, I missed out then," Harley complained with a pout making Ivy chuckle. "Say, did you see us together there?" She then asked, smiling hopefully at her. Her memories came flooding in, instances of them making out, countless stories of them being a couple, and an untold number of fanarts of the two screwing each other came flooding in. She felt her cheeks turn dark green at the thought. She knew she and Harley were hot but how much could the internet thirst for them and have them together?! As couples even! They were friends… though she wouldn't mind having Harley as a girlfriend.
Harley screamed out inside her head yet kept her expression as calm and collected as she could even after she had just bawled her eyes out, "Y-yeah… and every single instance we were friends," She whispered back as she tried to still her beating heart at the sight of the beautiful smile on Harley's face. She could lose herself just staring into those big baby blue eyes of hers.
"Besties for life!" Harley cheered as she pulled her close to her rather busty chest and Ivy's mind stuttered for a bit while she processed just what happened. Thankfully, she didn't suffocate as Harley pulled her away just in time to allow her to breath.
Y-yeah, besties for life," Ivy replied with a shaky smile. Her thoughts and feeling warred inside her and how she really felt about Harley but one thing was sure about what she felt and that was she didn't want to loose Harley as someone close to her and she needed get her head out of her ass and apologize
"Hey Harley, want to go out shopping?" Ivy asked before she added "I'm really sorry about earlier and I was being a shitty friend. I know it doesn't mean much but I could fork in a few hundred dollars?" She's probably going to regret it, but seeing that goofy smile on Harley was worth it. Next thing she knew, she was pushed into the bath being ordered to hurry up. Well, who was she to say no to that; especially when it felt like she was going to have a great day ahead.
A/N:
So Ivy gets to live another life and comes out a bit wiser from it. She spent nearly 25 years out there and now she's back a bit more mellow. I think that Gotham is not ready for what's to come lol. Also, poor wallet doesn't know what's about to hit it.
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Just dropping by to say that the March Polls are in! If you want to keep the current line up of fics active or have a new one have some time in the lime light, best to drop by my patreon!
Heh. I just love writing romance. It's so fun. Speaking of mushrooms, do you know that there's The Grey? The mushroom equivalent to the Green
Shovels and Shotguns: Prologue [Warhammer 40k Death Korp of Krieger Gamer SI]
- Location
- A Tropical Island in the Pacific
Prologue
All was quiet on the front she was assigned to, yet it filled her with nothing but dread. For a few precious hours the guns of the Death Korp Siege Artillery attached to her regiment had stopped thundering as the walls of the fortress before them fell silent. There was still the staccato of gunfire from the look outs, but for one brief instance in this campaign there was just blissful yet uneasy silence.
After hours of non stop bombardment they were finally given some reprieve and rest. Taking advantage of this brief lull in the siege, the regiment she was attached to was quick to whip up a hot meal for the men and women on this front to lift their spirits; something that everyone needed with how long their lines had remained static in the face of such stiff resistance.
There she stood amongst beleaguered and weary soldiers as they lined up for their meal, "Here you go lassie, a hearty serving of vermin stew to fill you up. Should let you grow nice and healthy!" The cook joked as he took a jab at her height. It wasn't something she could control given how she was born of a ratling. She was supposed to be small and cute, not tall and oafish like the rest of them.
"Ever the comedian Joyeuse," She replied as she rolled her eyes while she held up her tray. Stirring the pot before him, he then lifted up his ladle and started pouring her share of the rations. She then frowned as she noticed that the soup in her bowl was just a tiny bit less filled than usual, "Hey, this is one less scoop than last time! Damn it, you know I'm already getting scraps here," She complained as she kept holding up her tray, demanding he fix this at once.
"Sorry Cici, General's orders. Can't give you more food than is absolutely necessary. The supplies are stretched as it is, we need to make this one last before the next supply run comes our way," the man apologized and she couldn't help but grumble at that. It was that time of the month when the rations are just about to run out and they didn't know if the rations were going to last. They just needed to last long enough before they could feast for a bit on fresh food, "Good news though! The quartermaster found several boxes of recaf hidden behind some Ammo boxes so you can drink to your heart's content."
She sighed as she lowered her tray before she pulled out her flask and tossed it to the man, "Fine, but fill her to the brim, got it?" she replied as she tapped on her foot while waiting for the man to give her her drink.
With her canteen filled to the brim with the precious, life-giving liquid and her sad bowl of watered down corpse starch and vermin meat, she walked back to the mixed bag that was her squad as they tended to the campfire. She had to bite back a groan as they waved at her, "There she is! How's our squad's mascot doing?" Her joker of a squad leader teased her as she plopped herself down. Even behind that scarf he wore over the lower half of his face his smile still reaches up to his eyes.
"Fuck off Hasim, I'm hungry," She flipped him off as she was reaching for her pockets to pull up some vermin jerky her brother made for her. Tearing up the preserved meat, she sprinkled it over her bowl as garnishing for the insultingly thin stew they were served with.
"Aw, is someone getting a bit cranky?" Their group's heavy weapons specialist and resident beast man teased. For a beastman he looked for more like a horned man rather than the far more bestial abhuman he was. Despite that, he was just as rude and stupid as any beastman will ever be.
"Shut it, some of us want to enjoy peace and quiet while the artillery crews take their rest," A heavily accented voice called out from their group. The beast man was quick to shut up with the Vostroyan leveling a glare at him.
"Remember your Retirement Plan, remember your house in the colonies," She muttered, reminding herself of her dream. If she was ever to retire from old age she needed to keep her record clean enough and survive long enough. As tempting as it was to throttle the beastman, she didn't want to risk her retirement just for the cheap thrill of seeing him bloodied.
Sometimes, she wondered if it would have been better if she had just volunteered for the scouting parties. At least she'd be far more appreciated in the field with her kind. Given how small and diminutive she was even compared to her already tiny brethren, she'd make for a great scout. Then again, she'd be exposed to the horrors of no man's land and she'd be all alone; just her and her Long Las rifle.
As for why she, the sharpshooter extraordinaire that she was, and a Vostroyan Firstborn were stuck with these clowns? It was simply a matter of regiments being decimated and torn up by the campaign. With some regiments down to their last man, it was decided that the leftovers were to be lumped together. Thus, the 101st Irregulars was born.
Situations like theirs was the norm as not only did they fight back against Heretics but they also had to contend with the Orkish horde that had risen up due with the PDF no longer culling their numbers. There were even rumors of the thrice damned Eldar snooping around. The Heretics and the Orks were one thing, but the Eldar? She wished nothing but death and agony on the knife ears. If they were here, they were probably looking to swoop in and claim this planet while they were weakened. Considering this planet was the last line of defense to a nearby Forge World, that simply cannot happen.
She sighed as she dug into the watery gruel before her and grimaced at the bland taste that graced her tongue. Cardboard had far more flavor than what she was eating and not even the, admittedly tasty, scraps of vermin meat could save her meal. She had to force it down with her recaf else it wasn't staying down. As she was eating, she noticed something peculiar over at the campfire where the still relatively intact Krieger Regiment sat.
There in their lonesome, amidst the sea of faceless soldiers in their orderly groups, was a lone Krieger separated from the rest by a good distance away. The man was just like any other Krieger, bigger yes, but still faceless like the rest of them with that same habit of theirs of wearing their mask almost all the time.
What piqued her interest was not the fact that the man chose to sit away from his brothers, but the fact that his only companion was an Ogryn of all things. What was weirder was the two having quite the animated conversation with the Ogyrn laughing at the muffled replies of the Krieger. For a second, she thought she was seeing double but even as she rubbed her eyes, they were still there.
"Hey guys, you see what I'm seeing?" She asked as she pointed over at two.
Hasim and the rest turned and almost all of them did a double take at the sight of the two. Yes, they could not understand the Krieger one bit, but the ogyrn looked like they were doubling over laughing. Yes, Ogyrns were easy to amuse but it wasn't that ogyrn that was the problem here, it was who was currently amusing the Ogyrn and she just couldn't make heads or tails of what she's seeing right now.
"Wait, are those guys telling jokes to each other?" Hasim asked incredulously as he looked at the two in disbelief.
"Never in my life did I think I would ever see a Krieger having fun…" the Vostroyan mouthed as he too stared in disbelief.
"Do any of you know who those two are?" She then asked them as her curiosity got the better of her. All she got was head shaking in negative, making her huff out in annoyance, "Seriously? Nothing? You're all useless I swear," She complained as went back to eating her gruel to hopefully get them off her mind.
Hasim's gaze, however, still remained on the two as he then stated, "You know, come to think of it. That's the first time that guy came to this position. Never seen that guy before…" It was now their turn to look at the man in disbelief as he looked back at them in turn. Confusion was clearly painted across their faces as they asked, "What? You can spot the difference between Kriegers if you spend enough time with them."
"So, what sets these two apart aside from the Ogryn," Cici probed while she chewed on her meal. To her, all of them looked the same, smelled the same, and sounded the same. If it wasn't for the name tag they had on their uniforms, it would be hard to know who she was talking to until they brought it up.
"See the guy's coat?" Hasim pointed out. Squinting, she noticed the dusty coat he wore. Despite the caked up mud and dirt with all the time they probably spent out in the field, it still looked relatively intact. Not a hole nor any patches could be seen in their gear.
"Yeah," She replied.
"It's brand new," Hasim answered, "Actually, everything they have is brand new," He then quickly added as he raised his brow.
"I don't get it," One of their squad mates asked. She frowned, wondering what that had to do with identifying a krieger. Everyone gets new gear from time to time as things were down or get damaged. Sure, they'd get a tanning from the quartermaster but it'll eventually be all replaced.
"You know how our lasguns often get passed on to the next poor schmuck after we die? Those guys take it to a whole nother level. Weapons, uniforms? You name it, it gets passed on. Their gear is built to last and with rumors about them being vatborn, I can see why they don't waste anything since it's going to fit them anyways," He mused.
"And this guy's gear is brand new..." She noted as her gaze drifted off to the other Kriegers. While his was dirty, theirs were a patch work of repairs over holes and tears. Their gear was worn in a way that only decades of use could mimic, "Now I'm getting all curious," She mused as a call rang out from the Krieger line as their meals were finished. They were quick to stand up and run to their stations to await further orders. They all ran except the Krieger and his friend.
Finishing her meal as far as she could, she then set aside her plate and said, "Hey, I'm going to be snooping around, talking to some people. Just want to know more about those two."
The turbaned man snorted as he waved her off, "Good luck getting a Krieger to talk. You'll have a better chance of having an actual conversation with a rock than those guys," The man replied with a shake of his head.
She smiled, making the man tilt his head at her, "Who said I'm going to be talking to the soldiers?" She fired back as her sights drifted off to the figure of a man wearing a distinct peaked cap amongst the faceless crowd.
-x-x-x-
"Good afternoon Commissar! Is this seat taken?" Cici greeted the man with her best smile just as the man was about to take a large bite out of the sausage in his fork. Being all wide eyed and innocent always came in handy when talking to men and getting what she wanted. After all, what was a little girl going to do to such a big and strong man? She could do plenty, but she'd rather have them underestimate her; especially with who she was dealing with.
Some would say that what she was doing was crazy and suicidal, walking up to a commissar of all things to strike up a conversation, but she would say she was just doing a calculated risk. Yes, Commissars aren't really the most reasonable of the bunch, but she wasn't talking to just any old and regular commissar. No, she was talking to the commissar of the Death Korp of Krieg. They were by far the calmest and most reasonable of them all, a not so high bar but a trait essential for keeping these soldiers from essentially flying off the handles.
The man blinked before he bit down on his sausage and chewed. Swallowing, he then replied, "... No, not at all," He scooted over a bit to give her a seat. Seeing that she didn't have a hole in her head, she sat down by his side with a happy hum, "So, what do you want to know about the soldiers under my care?" The man asked while he continued eating.
"Me? Curious, what makes you say that? Can't a girl have an honest conversation with someone?" She replied, doing her best to look offended but the snort of amusement the commissar made had her drop her act, 'Nothing really does get past these guys huh?' She thought to herself.
"Please, I've encountered enough ratlings to know when something caught your eyes, so spill it and make it easier for the both of us," The man chuckled as he stabbed the last sausage in his platter, "Also, no, I will not share my rations."
Cici pouted but conceded to the fact that the commissar saw through her act almost immediately. Then again, they were commissars for a reason, "Fine. Here I thought I could finesse you out of that meal you're eating," She sighed out. Turning her attention to the two enigmatic figures nearby, she then asked, "What's with those two? Never seen a Krieger ignore orders and just play around with his friend."
"Charles and Bosco? Best damn soldiers I've ever met, even if they have a few loose screws in their heads," The commissar answered without a hint of hesitation. There was no false platitude or praise directed at the two, just sheer respect and admiration. Something that was hard to believe given how the Krieger was currently balancing a shovel on the nose of his mask while the Ogryn clapped in amusement.
"Loose screws is an understatement," She remarked as she kept watch, "Looks like a whole toolbox's loose inside that head," She added at the absurdity of it all.
"Charles has that effect on people. He's nuts, but if you ever land yourself in trouble you can bet your ass that he'll be there to back you up. There's a reason why his friend Bosco follows him around," The commissar explained. Ogryns, as simplistic as they were, were good judges of character. Their childlike innocence lended itself well in making them extremely loyal to those they perceived as their friend.
"Did he save him?" Saving a ogyrn? They were living and breathing tanks, and they were technically walking tanks as they wore tank armor. To save them meant that there was enough trouble in the first place to bother such a large man.
"Yup, and taught him his numbers," The commissar answered, making her turn to him with mouth wide open.
"Excuse me?" She asked, seeing if she might have misheard him for the first time.
"Yup. He taught him basic arithmetic and everything," The man chuckled as he shook his head. His jovial expression soon melted away as finished his meal, "As for why he doesn't follow orders? Well, he's an irregular that the General loves to toss around the theater. You don't usually see him and his friends around unless things are going to get messy. Consider this your warning kid," He then said as he gathered his things and got up to get it cleaned.
"Wait, what do you mean by messy?" Cici questioned him just as he was about to go away.
The man looked back at her with a grave and serious expression as he answered, "The General ran out of fucks and patience so he's going to toss his best to break the enemy lines."
"I'll keep that in mind…" She replied as she looked back uneasily.
"It's best you keep your distance as things tend to get a little weird around them," With those parting words, he left which left him with more questions than answers. The mystery only deepened the more she dug around. Who the hell just was this guy?
She walked back to her squad, her mind abuzz as her mind was occupied with the mysterious man. She sighed as she realized that she was going to have to ask the man himself if she was going to get anything. She couldn't talk to anyone else and she'd rather not risk herself any further with talking with the commissar again.
Her thoughts were delayed as a voice called out behind her, "Staff Sergeant Hasim Nazer and Sergeant Charlotte Corday?" There standing behind them was a bored looking lieutenant who looked a bit ruffled, probably with how it looked like he was pulled away from an office with the distinct lack of mud and dirt in his uniform.
"Yes?" Hasim asked as the rest of the squad looked up to what they were doing.
"High Command requests your squad's presence at the command tent immediately," The man declared, making her stomach drop while the warning of the commissar rang in her ears. She had to bite back a curse as she, along with the rest of her squad were escorted to a nearby transport waiting just for them.
"I should have listened to that Commissar," Cici muttered while biting her thumb as she tapped her heels against the cheap and hastily laid rockcrete floor of the command tent. There they sat around a table inside one of the many rooms inside the large spacious tent of the general. Away from the fighting only the distant din of the gun fire and artillery strikes could be heard from the distance. Despite being away from the action, she wished she was back on the front line as not only was her squad here but also the strange Krieger that had caught her attention earlier.
"Cheer up Cici, at least you won't die alone!" Hasim joked as he chuckled nervously. Not even the normally unflappable Vostroyan was unaffected as he crossed his arms across his chest. Everyone was on edge. After all, it wasn't every day that the high command called for soldiers away from the front line.
"Shut up!" She hissed back as she rocked on her seat. Scratching her head, she complained, "Damn it! How can I retire now if I'm going to be sent on a damn suicide mission."
"Are you sure it's a suicide mission? They only rounded up our squad and that guy you were interested in in this tent. Maybe they'll get attached to our unit?" Hasim suggested, giving her some pause as she thinked about it.
"Maybe you're right. I have to think positive." Cici replied as she took deep calming breaths Maybe, just maybe, but probably unlikely as they could have just sent a message over at vox to give the order or even a courier. Still, there was a slim chance it was something else. Maybe they were being promoted!
Before she could think any further, the flaps that served as the door parted revealing the heavily decorated and imposing commander of this region. He was trailed by a young blonde girl whose sharp gaze sent shivers of fear down her spine along with a techpriest who held onto a device with reverence. Everyone stood up, bar the Ogyrn who knelt, as they saluted the man, "Sir!"
"At ease gentlemen," The man ordered as he sat at the head of the table. They soon followed suit. His adjutant(?) stood by his side while the tech priest set up the device in front of him while praying a litany of binary chants and prayers.
Clearing his throat, he called upon their attention as he said, "I'll keep it short and simple. I need you here for two reasons," Nodding over to the Krieger, he then announced, "First of all, Staff Sergeant Hasim, meet your new squadmates, Staff Sergeant Charles-0412 and Bosco. This assignment is only temporary and will last so long as I deem it so, understand?"
"Yes sir," Hasim replied as they looked at the two. Up close, and in the presence of a commanding officer, they looked quite normal. The ogyrn was quite well behaved while the Krieger looked a little bit pent up as she noticed the man's foot tapping on the floor.
"As for the second reason, I need your squad for a crucial mission for this front," He then said, as he nodded to his adjutant, "Major Tanya, you can take over from here."
"Thank your General," The Major replied. Stepping forward, the diminutive looking woman thanked the techpriest who nodded before slinking back to the edge of the room. For a brief second, she stood there observing them, judging them. Cold sweat dripped down her forehead as they waited in bated breath until finally, she spoke up, "Now you might be wondering why your squad was specifically chosen. Why out of all the men and women serving under the Irregulars, you were chosen? The answer is simple. Your squad is by far the most varied among all the regiments, even within the Irregulars themselves. Not only that, but your combat record speaks for itself. Twelve months with few casualties? You're certainly up to the task we have in store for you."
The woman started strong as she felt a bit of pride well up her chest, but she had lived through so much shit that she wasn't fooled. She could feel when the woman was buttering them up. Yes, they were technically the last of their respective regiments and groups but this squad also had quite the number of ab humans. A small voice in the back of her head reminded her that technically she was undesirable but she squished it as she focused back on the topic at hand.
"We searched for the best and we found the best. Do not betray the expectations that we have set upon you." The woman challenged them. Now, everyone's attention was on her as she felt what little pride she had inflamed by the woman's words. She was good, she had to admit.
Reaching out, she pressed a small button on the flat device on the table before lit up. Suddenly, the table before them was overlaid with a green holographic rendition of the lone continent of the world they were on, "Now, I would like you all to turn your attention to the live feed map before you," She called out as he pointed at the map before her. Immediately, the colors changed as the map was divided into three sections.
There in the west, colored in gold, were the territories held by the Imperium. To the north the map stayed green denoting the territories held by the Orks. There in the east, beyond the great mountain range that split the continent in twain, was the blood red territory held by the traitors to the emperor.
Gesturing at the map below, the image zoomed in as the mountain range soon became visible. Pointing at the singular pass blocked by a formidable fortress, the same fortress that they had been bombarding all this time, "As you can see from the map before you, our lines stalled after our forces reached this fortress. Flanked by two large mountain ranges, this fortress sits right at the only entrance leading to heretic heartlands. Due to this lone heretic stronghold, the line has remained static for the last six months. We have thrown everything at it yet the cultists inside remain and the fortress still stands. Not even the famed soldiers of Krieg can break their walls from the outside," She explained. To the Kriegers' defense, they were but a small regiment.
She then pointed at them as she declared, "That's where your squad would come in. Our scouting forces have found a hidden goat path up the mountains that leads to a relatively undefended section of the fortress. Unfortunately, due to the nature of this path, we can only send in one squad at a time. Any bigger and you'd just be slowed down and detected."
The map zoomed in once more to show the large, towering mountains flanking the fortress. A small golden trail soon traced itself from the camp surrounding the western end of the fortress, up to the mountains beside them and towards the southern flank of the fortress.
"Under the cover of darkness, you are to take this path and scale the walls in that part of their strong hold. Once inside, you have two objectives. Your first objective is to plant explosive charges inside their armory to cause a distraction. Your second, and most important, objective is to head for the gate, open it up, and keep it open long enough for our forces to storm in and take control of the entrance," The woman ordered as she gave them a blank requisition sheet that was already signed. If she wasn't being tossed into what was effectively a suicide mission she would have rejoiced, but now she she had to be serious about filling up what they need. Yes, they were given a blank check but they could only carry so much. They needed to make this count.
Leaning down on the table, the Major then said, "I can not stress enough how important this mission is for our campaign. So long as this fortress remains a thorn in our side the heretics can remain secure in their end of the continent and regroup enough that they can launch their own counter offensives. The fate of this theater is in your hands."
With that, the hologram faded away as the Major pressed another button. The tech priest came forward once more to retrieve the device and performed their prayer upon it. Given how advanced it was it was no wonder that they worshiped it.
"Any other questions?" The woman questioned to which they responded too with shakes of their heads. The mission was simple. Get in, crash the party, hold the door open, and stay alive long enough for their forces to flood in. The lack of any commands asking them to value their safety was concerning, but they just had to deal with the cards dealt for them, "Good, Operation Ragtag starts at 0200 hours tomorrow. The Emperor protects."
And thus, her adventurer with this weird Krieger started. If she was given the chance to back out now and choose the emperor's mercy instead she would have considered it, but what was to come might just be the single most defining moment of her life. She only wished that she wasn't going to be in so much danger.
A/N:
One of my patrons asked if I could make a fic revolving around a Death Korp of Krieg character so here it is! Got to say, I do kinda like it. Though it is from the outsiders perspective, something I have increasingly used, it'll still follow the misadventures of this one Krieger as he drags everyone along in his weirdness. Oh yes, I actually plan on this being a gamer fic but our little Ratling hasn't been added to the party so she doesn't quite know just how insane things are going to get.
All was quiet on the front she was assigned to, yet it filled her with nothing but dread. For a few precious hours the guns of the Death Korp Siege Artillery attached to her regiment had stopped thundering as the walls of the fortress before them fell silent. There was still the staccato of gunfire from the look outs, but for one brief instance in this campaign there was just blissful yet uneasy silence.
After hours of non stop bombardment they were finally given some reprieve and rest. Taking advantage of this brief lull in the siege, the regiment she was attached to was quick to whip up a hot meal for the men and women on this front to lift their spirits; something that everyone needed with how long their lines had remained static in the face of such stiff resistance.
There she stood amongst beleaguered and weary soldiers as they lined up for their meal, "Here you go lassie, a hearty serving of vermin stew to fill you up. Should let you grow nice and healthy!" The cook joked as he took a jab at her height. It wasn't something she could control given how she was born of a ratling. She was supposed to be small and cute, not tall and oafish like the rest of them.
"Ever the comedian Joyeuse," She replied as she rolled her eyes while she held up her tray. Stirring the pot before him, he then lifted up his ladle and started pouring her share of the rations. She then frowned as she noticed that the soup in her bowl was just a tiny bit less filled than usual, "Hey, this is one less scoop than last time! Damn it, you know I'm already getting scraps here," She complained as she kept holding up her tray, demanding he fix this at once.
"Sorry Cici, General's orders. Can't give you more food than is absolutely necessary. The supplies are stretched as it is, we need to make this one last before the next supply run comes our way," the man apologized and she couldn't help but grumble at that. It was that time of the month when the rations are just about to run out and they didn't know if the rations were going to last. They just needed to last long enough before they could feast for a bit on fresh food, "Good news though! The quartermaster found several boxes of recaf hidden behind some Ammo boxes so you can drink to your heart's content."
She sighed as she lowered her tray before she pulled out her flask and tossed it to the man, "Fine, but fill her to the brim, got it?" she replied as she tapped on her foot while waiting for the man to give her her drink.
With her canteen filled to the brim with the precious, life-giving liquid and her sad bowl of watered down corpse starch and vermin meat, she walked back to the mixed bag that was her squad as they tended to the campfire. She had to bite back a groan as they waved at her, "There she is! How's our squad's mascot doing?" Her joker of a squad leader teased her as she plopped herself down. Even behind that scarf he wore over the lower half of his face his smile still reaches up to his eyes.
"Fuck off Hasim, I'm hungry," She flipped him off as she was reaching for her pockets to pull up some vermin jerky her brother made for her. Tearing up the preserved meat, she sprinkled it over her bowl as garnishing for the insultingly thin stew they were served with.
"Aw, is someone getting a bit cranky?" Their group's heavy weapons specialist and resident beast man teased. For a beastman he looked for more like a horned man rather than the far more bestial abhuman he was. Despite that, he was just as rude and stupid as any beastman will ever be.
"Shut it, some of us want to enjoy peace and quiet while the artillery crews take their rest," A heavily accented voice called out from their group. The beast man was quick to shut up with the Vostroyan leveling a glare at him.
"Remember your Retirement Plan, remember your house in the colonies," She muttered, reminding herself of her dream. If she was ever to retire from old age she needed to keep her record clean enough and survive long enough. As tempting as it was to throttle the beastman, she didn't want to risk her retirement just for the cheap thrill of seeing him bloodied.
Sometimes, she wondered if it would have been better if she had just volunteered for the scouting parties. At least she'd be far more appreciated in the field with her kind. Given how small and diminutive she was even compared to her already tiny brethren, she'd make for a great scout. Then again, she'd be exposed to the horrors of no man's land and she'd be all alone; just her and her Long Las rifle.
As for why she, the sharpshooter extraordinaire that she was, and a Vostroyan Firstborn were stuck with these clowns? It was simply a matter of regiments being decimated and torn up by the campaign. With some regiments down to their last man, it was decided that the leftovers were to be lumped together. Thus, the 101st Irregulars was born.
Situations like theirs was the norm as not only did they fight back against Heretics but they also had to contend with the Orkish horde that had risen up due with the PDF no longer culling their numbers. There were even rumors of the thrice damned Eldar snooping around. The Heretics and the Orks were one thing, but the Eldar? She wished nothing but death and agony on the knife ears. If they were here, they were probably looking to swoop in and claim this planet while they were weakened. Considering this planet was the last line of defense to a nearby Forge World, that simply cannot happen.
She sighed as she dug into the watery gruel before her and grimaced at the bland taste that graced her tongue. Cardboard had far more flavor than what she was eating and not even the, admittedly tasty, scraps of vermin meat could save her meal. She had to force it down with her recaf else it wasn't staying down. As she was eating, she noticed something peculiar over at the campfire where the still relatively intact Krieger Regiment sat.
There in their lonesome, amidst the sea of faceless soldiers in their orderly groups, was a lone Krieger separated from the rest by a good distance away. The man was just like any other Krieger, bigger yes, but still faceless like the rest of them with that same habit of theirs of wearing their mask almost all the time.
What piqued her interest was not the fact that the man chose to sit away from his brothers, but the fact that his only companion was an Ogryn of all things. What was weirder was the two having quite the animated conversation with the Ogyrn laughing at the muffled replies of the Krieger. For a second, she thought she was seeing double but even as she rubbed her eyes, they were still there.
"Hey guys, you see what I'm seeing?" She asked as she pointed over at two.
Hasim and the rest turned and almost all of them did a double take at the sight of the two. Yes, they could not understand the Krieger one bit, but the ogyrn looked like they were doubling over laughing. Yes, Ogyrns were easy to amuse but it wasn't that ogyrn that was the problem here, it was who was currently amusing the Ogyrn and she just couldn't make heads or tails of what she's seeing right now.
"Wait, are those guys telling jokes to each other?" Hasim asked incredulously as he looked at the two in disbelief.
"Never in my life did I think I would ever see a Krieger having fun…" the Vostroyan mouthed as he too stared in disbelief.
"Do any of you know who those two are?" She then asked them as her curiosity got the better of her. All she got was head shaking in negative, making her huff out in annoyance, "Seriously? Nothing? You're all useless I swear," She complained as went back to eating her gruel to hopefully get them off her mind.
Hasim's gaze, however, still remained on the two as he then stated, "You know, come to think of it. That's the first time that guy came to this position. Never seen that guy before…" It was now their turn to look at the man in disbelief as he looked back at them in turn. Confusion was clearly painted across their faces as they asked, "What? You can spot the difference between Kriegers if you spend enough time with them."
"So, what sets these two apart aside from the Ogryn," Cici probed while she chewed on her meal. To her, all of them looked the same, smelled the same, and sounded the same. If it wasn't for the name tag they had on their uniforms, it would be hard to know who she was talking to until they brought it up.
"See the guy's coat?" Hasim pointed out. Squinting, she noticed the dusty coat he wore. Despite the caked up mud and dirt with all the time they probably spent out in the field, it still looked relatively intact. Not a hole nor any patches could be seen in their gear.
"Yeah," She replied.
"It's brand new," Hasim answered, "Actually, everything they have is brand new," He then quickly added as he raised his brow.
"I don't get it," One of their squad mates asked. She frowned, wondering what that had to do with identifying a krieger. Everyone gets new gear from time to time as things were down or get damaged. Sure, they'd get a tanning from the quartermaster but it'll eventually be all replaced.
"You know how our lasguns often get passed on to the next poor schmuck after we die? Those guys take it to a whole nother level. Weapons, uniforms? You name it, it gets passed on. Their gear is built to last and with rumors about them being vatborn, I can see why they don't waste anything since it's going to fit them anyways," He mused.
"And this guy's gear is brand new..." She noted as her gaze drifted off to the other Kriegers. While his was dirty, theirs were a patch work of repairs over holes and tears. Their gear was worn in a way that only decades of use could mimic, "Now I'm getting all curious," She mused as a call rang out from the Krieger line as their meals were finished. They were quick to stand up and run to their stations to await further orders. They all ran except the Krieger and his friend.
Finishing her meal as far as she could, she then set aside her plate and said, "Hey, I'm going to be snooping around, talking to some people. Just want to know more about those two."
The turbaned man snorted as he waved her off, "Good luck getting a Krieger to talk. You'll have a better chance of having an actual conversation with a rock than those guys," The man replied with a shake of his head.
She smiled, making the man tilt his head at her, "Who said I'm going to be talking to the soldiers?" She fired back as her sights drifted off to the figure of a man wearing a distinct peaked cap amongst the faceless crowd.
-x-x-x-
"Good afternoon Commissar! Is this seat taken?" Cici greeted the man with her best smile just as the man was about to take a large bite out of the sausage in his fork. Being all wide eyed and innocent always came in handy when talking to men and getting what she wanted. After all, what was a little girl going to do to such a big and strong man? She could do plenty, but she'd rather have them underestimate her; especially with who she was dealing with.
Some would say that what she was doing was crazy and suicidal, walking up to a commissar of all things to strike up a conversation, but she would say she was just doing a calculated risk. Yes, Commissars aren't really the most reasonable of the bunch, but she wasn't talking to just any old and regular commissar. No, she was talking to the commissar of the Death Korp of Krieg. They were by far the calmest and most reasonable of them all, a not so high bar but a trait essential for keeping these soldiers from essentially flying off the handles.
The man blinked before he bit down on his sausage and chewed. Swallowing, he then replied, "... No, not at all," He scooted over a bit to give her a seat. Seeing that she didn't have a hole in her head, she sat down by his side with a happy hum, "So, what do you want to know about the soldiers under my care?" The man asked while he continued eating.
"Me? Curious, what makes you say that? Can't a girl have an honest conversation with someone?" She replied, doing her best to look offended but the snort of amusement the commissar made had her drop her act, 'Nothing really does get past these guys huh?' She thought to herself.
"Please, I've encountered enough ratlings to know when something caught your eyes, so spill it and make it easier for the both of us," The man chuckled as he stabbed the last sausage in his platter, "Also, no, I will not share my rations."
Cici pouted but conceded to the fact that the commissar saw through her act almost immediately. Then again, they were commissars for a reason, "Fine. Here I thought I could finesse you out of that meal you're eating," She sighed out. Turning her attention to the two enigmatic figures nearby, she then asked, "What's with those two? Never seen a Krieger ignore orders and just play around with his friend."
"Charles and Bosco? Best damn soldiers I've ever met, even if they have a few loose screws in their heads," The commissar answered without a hint of hesitation. There was no false platitude or praise directed at the two, just sheer respect and admiration. Something that was hard to believe given how the Krieger was currently balancing a shovel on the nose of his mask while the Ogryn clapped in amusement.
"Loose screws is an understatement," She remarked as she kept watch, "Looks like a whole toolbox's loose inside that head," She added at the absurdity of it all.
"Charles has that effect on people. He's nuts, but if you ever land yourself in trouble you can bet your ass that he'll be there to back you up. There's a reason why his friend Bosco follows him around," The commissar explained. Ogryns, as simplistic as they were, were good judges of character. Their childlike innocence lended itself well in making them extremely loyal to those they perceived as their friend.
"Did he save him?" Saving a ogyrn? They were living and breathing tanks, and they were technically walking tanks as they wore tank armor. To save them meant that there was enough trouble in the first place to bother such a large man.
"Yup, and taught him his numbers," The commissar answered, making her turn to him with mouth wide open.
"Excuse me?" She asked, seeing if she might have misheard him for the first time.
"Yup. He taught him basic arithmetic and everything," The man chuckled as he shook his head. His jovial expression soon melted away as finished his meal, "As for why he doesn't follow orders? Well, he's an irregular that the General loves to toss around the theater. You don't usually see him and his friends around unless things are going to get messy. Consider this your warning kid," He then said as he gathered his things and got up to get it cleaned.
"Wait, what do you mean by messy?" Cici questioned him just as he was about to go away.
The man looked back at her with a grave and serious expression as he answered, "The General ran out of fucks and patience so he's going to toss his best to break the enemy lines."
"I'll keep that in mind…" She replied as she looked back uneasily.
"It's best you keep your distance as things tend to get a little weird around them," With those parting words, he left which left him with more questions than answers. The mystery only deepened the more she dug around. Who the hell just was this guy?
She walked back to her squad, her mind abuzz as her mind was occupied with the mysterious man. She sighed as she realized that she was going to have to ask the man himself if she was going to get anything. She couldn't talk to anyone else and she'd rather not risk herself any further with talking with the commissar again.
Her thoughts were delayed as a voice called out behind her, "Staff Sergeant Hasim Nazer and Sergeant Charlotte Corday?" There standing behind them was a bored looking lieutenant who looked a bit ruffled, probably with how it looked like he was pulled away from an office with the distinct lack of mud and dirt in his uniform.
"Yes?" Hasim asked as the rest of the squad looked up to what they were doing.
"High Command requests your squad's presence at the command tent immediately," The man declared, making her stomach drop while the warning of the commissar rang in her ears. She had to bite back a curse as she, along with the rest of her squad were escorted to a nearby transport waiting just for them.
"I should have listened to that Commissar," Cici muttered while biting her thumb as she tapped her heels against the cheap and hastily laid rockcrete floor of the command tent. There they sat around a table inside one of the many rooms inside the large spacious tent of the general. Away from the fighting only the distant din of the gun fire and artillery strikes could be heard from the distance. Despite being away from the action, she wished she was back on the front line as not only was her squad here but also the strange Krieger that had caught her attention earlier.
"Cheer up Cici, at least you won't die alone!" Hasim joked as he chuckled nervously. Not even the normally unflappable Vostroyan was unaffected as he crossed his arms across his chest. Everyone was on edge. After all, it wasn't every day that the high command called for soldiers away from the front line.
"Shut up!" She hissed back as she rocked on her seat. Scratching her head, she complained, "Damn it! How can I retire now if I'm going to be sent on a damn suicide mission."
"Are you sure it's a suicide mission? They only rounded up our squad and that guy you were interested in in this tent. Maybe they'll get attached to our unit?" Hasim suggested, giving her some pause as she thinked about it.
"Maybe you're right. I have to think positive." Cici replied as she took deep calming breaths Maybe, just maybe, but probably unlikely as they could have just sent a message over at vox to give the order or even a courier. Still, there was a slim chance it was something else. Maybe they were being promoted!
Before she could think any further, the flaps that served as the door parted revealing the heavily decorated and imposing commander of this region. He was trailed by a young blonde girl whose sharp gaze sent shivers of fear down her spine along with a techpriest who held onto a device with reverence. Everyone stood up, bar the Ogyrn who knelt, as they saluted the man, "Sir!"
"At ease gentlemen," The man ordered as he sat at the head of the table. They soon followed suit. His adjutant(?) stood by his side while the tech priest set up the device in front of him while praying a litany of binary chants and prayers.
Clearing his throat, he called upon their attention as he said, "I'll keep it short and simple. I need you here for two reasons," Nodding over to the Krieger, he then announced, "First of all, Staff Sergeant Hasim, meet your new squadmates, Staff Sergeant Charles-0412 and Bosco. This assignment is only temporary and will last so long as I deem it so, understand?"
"Yes sir," Hasim replied as they looked at the two. Up close, and in the presence of a commanding officer, they looked quite normal. The ogyrn was quite well behaved while the Krieger looked a little bit pent up as she noticed the man's foot tapping on the floor.
"As for the second reason, I need your squad for a crucial mission for this front," He then said, as he nodded to his adjutant, "Major Tanya, you can take over from here."
"Thank your General," The Major replied. Stepping forward, the diminutive looking woman thanked the techpriest who nodded before slinking back to the edge of the room. For a brief second, she stood there observing them, judging them. Cold sweat dripped down her forehead as they waited in bated breath until finally, she spoke up, "Now you might be wondering why your squad was specifically chosen. Why out of all the men and women serving under the Irregulars, you were chosen? The answer is simple. Your squad is by far the most varied among all the regiments, even within the Irregulars themselves. Not only that, but your combat record speaks for itself. Twelve months with few casualties? You're certainly up to the task we have in store for you."
The woman started strong as she felt a bit of pride well up her chest, but she had lived through so much shit that she wasn't fooled. She could feel when the woman was buttering them up. Yes, they were technically the last of their respective regiments and groups but this squad also had quite the number of ab humans. A small voice in the back of her head reminded her that technically she was undesirable but she squished it as she focused back on the topic at hand.
"We searched for the best and we found the best. Do not betray the expectations that we have set upon you." The woman challenged them. Now, everyone's attention was on her as she felt what little pride she had inflamed by the woman's words. She was good, she had to admit.
Reaching out, she pressed a small button on the flat device on the table before lit up. Suddenly, the table before them was overlaid with a green holographic rendition of the lone continent of the world they were on, "Now, I would like you all to turn your attention to the live feed map before you," She called out as he pointed at the map before her. Immediately, the colors changed as the map was divided into three sections.
There in the west, colored in gold, were the territories held by the Imperium. To the north the map stayed green denoting the territories held by the Orks. There in the east, beyond the great mountain range that split the continent in twain, was the blood red territory held by the traitors to the emperor.
Gesturing at the map below, the image zoomed in as the mountain range soon became visible. Pointing at the singular pass blocked by a formidable fortress, the same fortress that they had been bombarding all this time, "As you can see from the map before you, our lines stalled after our forces reached this fortress. Flanked by two large mountain ranges, this fortress sits right at the only entrance leading to heretic heartlands. Due to this lone heretic stronghold, the line has remained static for the last six months. We have thrown everything at it yet the cultists inside remain and the fortress still stands. Not even the famed soldiers of Krieg can break their walls from the outside," She explained. To the Kriegers' defense, they were but a small regiment.
She then pointed at them as she declared, "That's where your squad would come in. Our scouting forces have found a hidden goat path up the mountains that leads to a relatively undefended section of the fortress. Unfortunately, due to the nature of this path, we can only send in one squad at a time. Any bigger and you'd just be slowed down and detected."
The map zoomed in once more to show the large, towering mountains flanking the fortress. A small golden trail soon traced itself from the camp surrounding the western end of the fortress, up to the mountains beside them and towards the southern flank of the fortress.
"Under the cover of darkness, you are to take this path and scale the walls in that part of their strong hold. Once inside, you have two objectives. Your first objective is to plant explosive charges inside their armory to cause a distraction. Your second, and most important, objective is to head for the gate, open it up, and keep it open long enough for our forces to storm in and take control of the entrance," The woman ordered as she gave them a blank requisition sheet that was already signed. If she wasn't being tossed into what was effectively a suicide mission she would have rejoiced, but now she she had to be serious about filling up what they need. Yes, they were given a blank check but they could only carry so much. They needed to make this count.
Leaning down on the table, the Major then said, "I can not stress enough how important this mission is for our campaign. So long as this fortress remains a thorn in our side the heretics can remain secure in their end of the continent and regroup enough that they can launch their own counter offensives. The fate of this theater is in your hands."
With that, the hologram faded away as the Major pressed another button. The tech priest came forward once more to retrieve the device and performed their prayer upon it. Given how advanced it was it was no wonder that they worshiped it.
"Any other questions?" The woman questioned to which they responded too with shakes of their heads. The mission was simple. Get in, crash the party, hold the door open, and stay alive long enough for their forces to flood in. The lack of any commands asking them to value their safety was concerning, but they just had to deal with the cards dealt for them, "Good, Operation Ragtag starts at 0200 hours tomorrow. The Emperor protects."
And thus, her adventurer with this weird Krieger started. If she was given the chance to back out now and choose the emperor's mercy instead she would have considered it, but what was to come might just be the single most defining moment of her life. She only wished that she wasn't going to be in so much danger.
A/N:
One of my patrons asked if I could make a fic revolving around a Death Korp of Krieg character so here it is! Got to say, I do kinda like it. Though it is from the outsiders perspective, something I have increasingly used, it'll still follow the misadventures of this one Krieger as he drags everyone along in his weirdness. Oh yes, I actually plan on this being a gamer fic but our little Ratling hasn't been added to the party so she doesn't quite know just how insane things are going to get.