You take in a ragged breath. Let it out slowly. And in your lowest voice, you mutter: "What would it take for you to go along with me on somethin' real stupid?"
"...How stupid..." comes the hesitant reply.
"The kid is up to something. I think I might be dying. So. I'm going to go to the chapel, see the Chaplain like I said I would. Maybe it has answers for me, maybe it doesn't, but -" and here you stop, for you see the light sweeping towards you; you let it pass through you, leaving behind the intimate knowledge that you are
vermin, unworthy of freedom, unworthy of love, unworthy of the taste of sunlight. But even a rat abhors a cage, doesn't it? "- but...it's also close to the Panopticon. If I can bring the tower down, this place will explode."
Your cellmate bites its lip, leans away from its one glass foot. Looks away uncertainly.
So you pull it into you by the chest and press your forehead into its, faces close. "You don't have to help," you murmur. "But I'm doing this. It's freedom or death for me, or worse, parole."
Your cellmate lets out a ragged breath, shaky and hot against your lips, and then kisses you. You were not expecting this. You squeak, like a godsdamned toy, and bite it without thinking; it shivers, and you taste blood, see it dripping down your cellmate's chin in a thin stream when it pulls away. "Fuck you," it whispers. "I'm in. What do you need?"
Your heart is trying to slam its way out of the glass prison in your breast, but you concentrate. Focus. Listen to the not-breathing of the Wolf, that needs no air...
"...Distract the guards in twenty minutes. Then stay alive. Maybe get the kid to safety."
"You got it, doll."
* * * *
You're sure you can do this?
No. But I'm sure I don't have a choice. What are you doing?
Speaking dot code with a bunch of fish to a topless mermaid so your plan can succeed.
Uh-huh. And you're interested in me because...?
You have a gentle soul.
Weird way to pronounce 'big tits'.
I'm in a fucking coma, O Monarch of the No Compliments Ever. You have a gentle soul. I haven't even seen the big tits, are they nice?
Uhhhh...
Maybe?
Figure your shit out before you try to be cynical at me.
* * * *
Three minutes to get glass from your cell. Move casually. Don't start shit. Don't make eye contact with the other Inmates. You just have to make it through gen pop without rattling or rolling too much, which is helped by the bit where you fuse your glass into solid masses that spread through the linings of your jumpsuit; it makes the outfit hang a little weird, but who's looking at the hang of your outfit when the extra weight is making your chest stand out? No one, that's who. Some of the guards even inadvertently help you, as their laser-locked attention discourages some of the Inmates from starting shit...
Your cellmate deliberately bumps its -
- Her -
Ass against a guard and starts yelling in that way she does, full of outrage and demanding to know what the fuck the problem is, touching an Inmate like that. The guards around the hall towards the Chapel tighten their grip around their truncheons, start stepping forward. You touch your lip, unconsciously, and wonder again why your cellmate seems so loyal to you. Five years Inside and it's always been there for you, listened to you except about the Wolf sometimes, healed your hurts, and...and...
They're moving.
You slip in past them, unlock the door with your blank key and a touch of power, and you take off running. You've never been to the Chapel, not in all your time Inside, but it's the right of all Inmates to go, right? Your spiritual health is a right given to you even Inside, it has to be, it has to be, it...
That's a guard. "Halt!" it calls, drawing a truncheon. You touch the lining of your jumpsuit and slash out with your hand; a blade of glass springs from your sleeve, punctures the guard's throat like the flick of a frog's tongue, looses an explosion of blood that soaks your face and clothes. You don't slow down. You don't stop. Heavy boots you inexplicably have kept pound against concrete while you turn a corner and make a flicking motion with your dripping arm.
A storm of glass needles shreds three guards, unerringly seeking throats and eyes and faces, because they aren't needles, are they? They're
guided missiles, because you say so, because you say so and when you have enough focus what you say goes. You feel your stomach growl, but there's no time. A two-stage gate, but you take a passkey from a falling corpse on your way through, buzz yourself past them, and plunge into a room full of light, full of glorious sunlight and divinity and humanity that has been denied you and -
- Oh.
You do have a name, don't you? It's. It's Orchid.
Someone is screaming in agony, and after a moment you realize it's you. Somewhere across the Bay, at the shore, someone else who is also you is screaming. The two of you bleed from the eyes and mouth. You feel your flesh flicker and shake, unstable, unwhole, unwholesome -
You have been Inside for five years. You are a Convict. You must destroy the Panopticon.
You have only existed for three months. Your name is Orchid. You have never been Inside.
Your cellmate might love you, because you have been Inside, and no one else can understand, and the kid, it doesn't deserve to be here but it's doing something, it's not like the other Inmates, it's -
Nattie barely talks to you because things have been busy. There are others your heart flutters for. Marie never went Inside, and it would be cruel, so cruel, to imprison her.
You are here.
You are there.
You are here.