Respect is everything(GTA:SA SI)

Mamma Mia that's a spicy meatball.
I wonder how many are dead and how bad those bullet wounds are. Running around with all them bullets in ya can't be healthy.
 
Let's fill the empty slot with a rightwing outlaw biker club. They can be all brotherly then and combine against them in an epic gang war fest with police and national guard incoming too!
Rightwing outlaw bike club sounds very white in ethnicity. The parts next to the All Saint Hospital and Glen Park are very much part of the black part of town. But come to think about it, there is distinct lack of Gike Gang in San Andreas. We have the Triads, Latino, Black and the Mob. No bikers.
I think that needs fixing.
And you can't compare Max Payne with anyone except maybe Doomguy or Chuck Norris. Who else toughes out a shot lung with painkillers and keeps on fighting?
Of the top of my head Lara Croft, Duke Nukem, most characters Arnold Schwarzenegger portrait Rambo(couterising a wound by setting of gunpowder in it) so yeah quite a lot. Plus Max Payne was not the first videogame character that was self-medicating in Duke Nukem 3D you could eat a jar of steroids to run faster.
Mamma Mia that's a spicy meatball.
I wonder how many are dead and how bad those bullet wounds are. Running around with all them bullets in ya can't be healthy.
41 dead. The number of wounded unknown.
The protagonist shot and killed 11 of that number. She was wounded five times. Her wounds are to the legs, face and arms. She was shot more times in the chest, but those didn't penetrate the armor she had on. She was so heavily medicated she didn't even notice.

GTA cough medication has codine and morphine in it. That is the cough medication that that is sold for children. Sex change procedure is a do it yourself kit. The MC was on hospital grade stuff. You could drive a tank over her and she would just say Auu. It would kill her but the SI would be in not much pain.
 
Rightwing outlaw bike club sounds very white in ethnicity. The parts next to the All Saint Hospital and Glen Park are very much part of the black part of town. But come to think about it, there is distinct lack of Gike Gang in San Andreas. We have the Triads, Latino, Black and the Mob. No bikers.
I think that needs fixing.

Of the top of my head Lara Croft, Duke Nukem, most characters Arnold Schwarzenegger portrait Rambo(couterising a wound by setting of gunpowder in it) so yeah quite a lot. Plus Max Payne was not the first videogame character that was self-medicating in Duke Nukem 3D you could eat a jar of steroids to run faster.

41 dead. The number of wounded unknown.
The protagonist shot and killed 11 of that number. She was wounded five times. Her wounds are to the legs, face and arms. She was shot more times in the chest, but those didn't penetrate the armor she had on. She was so heavily medicated she didn't even notice.

GTA cough medication has codine and morphine in it. That is the cough medication that that is sold for children. Sex change procedure is a do it yourself kit. The MC was on hospital grade stuff. You could drive a tank over her and she would just say Auu. It would kill her but the SI would be in not much pain.

11 counts of self-defence I assume?
Also that must be some good shit jeez.
When bullets=mosquito bites you know somethings up.
 
12
"Didn't I tell you?" I know that voice. "Diamond in the rough!"

"Uhm hum" That one was Richards. What is he doing in my home? Was I home? I'm in a bed I know that much.
I opened my eyes.

'what is an IV drip doing here?' that was the first thing I noticed.

"Kurwa!" My eyes shot opened, Memories of the day before hit me like a sledgehammer.
I ripped the needle out of my arm.

"Oh your up!" Yes, I did know that voice. Officer Tenpenny was smiling at me.

"Easy there," Richards was not, "You shouldn't do that, put that back in."

"No" I protested, "that shit fucks me up."

"Nurse!!!" Tenpenny can be really loud if he wants to be.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

Before anyone could answer a Nurse came in the the room. "Whats going on?"

"She pulled out the IV needle." Richards said.

"Why would you do that honey?"

"Get that thing away from me!!!" I yelled trying to sit up.

"A big strong girl like you afraid of such a tiny little prick in her." I didn't respond to that, also not funny. The nurse watched as it attempted to crawl away. She rolled her eyes. "Gentlemen, mind holding her down for a moment?"

"Don't!" They didn't mind holding me down, and did. The nurse stabbed me in my arm with a needle.

Wow, that stuff works quick. What was I doing? Oh yeah I'm in hospital. Tenpenny and Richards are such nice people paying me a visit. Now that I was far more relaxed, I started noticing other things in the room. There are flowers and a large stuffed teddy bear in my room. 'Aww, how nice of them.' 'Who's them?' 'Don't know but they are nice'
Did I just had a conversation with myself in my head? Yes I did, mother always said: you need to talk with people that are actually intelligent every now and then. My Mom is very smart. She build Infra Red guidence systems and sold them to Iraqis.

"Now be a good girl and take your medication" Tenpenny told me.

"Ok" I smiled.

"You need anything?" Richards asked my. He looks actually worried. Why is he worried? I think he maybe worried for me. That is very nice of him.

"Thanks for visiting you two." It was nice of them.

"How could we not visit our very own honest to God hero?" Is Tenpenny yelling or is his voice just naturally loud? 'Wait what?'

"Hero?" I asked confused.

"The crime scene investigators are going over the area. Trying to figure out who shot who. So far you are up seven dirt bags."

"I like number seven its before eight and after six." I said.

"The fuck you give her?"Richards asked the Nurse.

"Well that's a bust, she is high as a kite. Lets jet and give her some peace and quiet." Yes Tenpenny you can go now. The nurse is putting the IV drip thingy by in my arm. I know I don't like that but what you gonna do.

"what you gonna do?" Why do I know that words. "Oh bad boys bad boys what you gonna do what you gonna do when they come for you."

"Shit! She is actually singing!"Why yes officer Tenpenny I do sing."God damn, that one bum of a witness was actually right."

"Get well soon." Richards follows Tenpenny out. "You need anything call me."

"I will." I said, "I don't have a phone or your number but I will."

"See Richards this trip was not for nothing." Tenpenny or Frank, can I call him Frank, I'll have to ask him, Is very jovial right now. "Now we know what we can get her."

I'm going to sleep now.

----------------------------

"Ehem!" Someone just cleared their throat very loudly.
I opened my eyes. A woman stood there. Every muscle in my body tensed. My eyes shot open.

"When they call me and said you is in hospital I though you OD or something." The woman voice was very judgemental. "Turns out you did, I can live with that, its about as much as I can expect of you. But you putting in that monkey suit and working for The Men! What the hell is you thinking?" She is wearing attire that conjures up images of people going to church, best sun day clothes. I know I never seen that woman. So why does my body goes in to full fight or flight mode around her.
"What Am I saying? You don't think! You never did. You is as dumb now as you ever were! Shit, dumber!"

Yes I am confused, and very much frightened for some reason.

"Have we meet?"

That question got me hit on the head with an umbrella handle. I didn't notice the woman had an umbrella with her.

"I'm your Moms fool!"

"I know that!" That's a lie. I didn't know that.

"Don't give me lip girl!" I got hit on the head again. "Your brothers and your father are turning in their graves right about now. The Police!?!" Umbrella handle found its way to my forehead again. "The Motherfucking POLICE!"

There was a little pause. Then I got hit on the head 3 times in the row.
"See what you made my do! I'm a God Fearing Christian Woman! You made me cus! I cannot speak with you anymore." The woman walked out and slammed the door behind her.

I looked at the ceiling, and absent mildly closed of the little valve on the IV drip.

"Well, that happened!"

----------------------------

"Saskia!" It was more of a screech that a world. "I came as soon as I heard!"
Ok this person I recognize. Its Jackie Brown. I remember the name, because there was a movie that was called that, I think. She is the woman that insists I know her.

"I got you some clothes to change, the nurse said you will be out today, I have my car with me. I'll give you a lift. I head what happened its terrible. Thank God you got out of it alive. I could never do that. What you did. Everyone is talking about it. The TV people want to interview you. Your Police Officers friends by the door didn't let them in. I think they did the right thing. You need your rest. I think I'll call my boss and tell him I need to take care of you. I'm great at taking care of people..."

It may have been the pain I been feeling. The little valve on the IV drip was still closed. But I really didn't want to be around this woman. Something about her was just not right. Far too peppy far too friendly.

"Jackie?" I cut her off

"Yes?" She was all smile and sun shine.

"Can you kindly, Shut. The. Fuck. Up!"

"Ok anything for you Saskia!" Her smile didn't drop a millimetre.

"I need to go to the bathroom."I said "Can you go get me something to eat."

"What you want?" She asked, looking at her holding that wide eyed cheery expression made my face hurt.

"You know what I like." I said.

There was a little tick in her face as I said that.

"Of-course I do. We two been friends for like ever!" Oh look, she is now straining herself to keep up that smile.

"Good, so go bring it!" Saying that I sat up on the bed and swung my legs of it.

"Be right back!" And she is gone. Good.

I looked around the room. There was a closet here. I walked up too it on shaking legs. Inside was a uniform, nope not happening. My wallet, armor and pistol were also there. Looking at the heavy vest made me feel uncomfortable. The thing looked like some one went to work on it with a pickaxe. There were dents on top of dents and burn marks. I don't remembered being on fire.

I closed my eyes and stretched out my arms. Arms work, good to know.
I bent my knees, legs seem operational. I twisted my body to the left, still working, I twisted to the right, no problems there.
I open my eyes and looked out the window. The sun is out the birds are singing, what a lovely day we are having.
Negative on the last! Grey matter not firing on all cylinders!
I need someone to keep an eye on me. Last time going out this hospital door didn't end well.

I looked around the room. There was a plastic bag by the bed. I looked inside. Gray hoody, white track pants. It was probably from Jackie.

I got out of the hospital pyjamas and in the things the woman brought me. The armor went under them pistol went under one of the straps on the armour. I opened the door a crack. No one was standing in the corridor.
An empty corridor in a hospital in the day time. Huh, maybe they don't have as much works as I thought.

I quickly made my way to the stair case. I walked all the way down. The exit from the stair case lead to the lobby. Here there was quite a lot of people. I noticed a row of pay phones I walked to them. Thank god for yellow pages. I went on looking for a number.

-------------------

"Reese's Barber Shot Reese speaking" finding that number took some time.

"Hello Sir this is Saskia, Saskia Jefferson."

"Good Lord Saskia, what happened to you. People on the street are saying all kind of things."

"Well sir I'm in the All Saints Hospital."Next part was a shot in the dark on my part."I hate to ask you this but could you by chance have the number for Johnny. He is the grandkid of our neighbour. He calls him self OG Dub-J or something silly like that now."

"The Henderson's kid, Why?"

"Well I'm in hospital and my head is not all well from all the pain killers. I'd like him to come and help me get home!"
The last part I said in a weak voice. I felt like I really needed his help. I had no idea why."

"Well I don't have his number but I can try to get in touch with him. Thought his granddad " A heavy weight fell of my chest hearing those words. I still had no idea why this was important.

-------------------------------

I didn't have to wait long. Or maybe I did, I dozed off for a moment.

"Wake up!" 'Johnny is here.'

"I'm up."

"You know I is doing you a real solid."he was speaking very loudly, I guess he wanted every one to hear. "You owe me big time!"

"Yes, I know" I got to my feet. Still a bit weak in the knees, also my head was spinning a bit.

"Were you stuff?"

"No stuff."

"Good come on." He grabbed my arm and pulled me to the exit. The action almost made me fall. The kid was quick on his feet. In seconds he had one arm around my waist and put my arm over his shoulder. He was the only thing keeping me vertical at the moment.

"Shit Woman! What you been eating? Anvils!"Johnny was straining to keep me upright"You is heavy!"

"I feel heavy."that was true. "You have a car."

"Shit Yes I have a Car!" He proclaimed, his indigence at the question was muffled by the fact he had trouble moving. I'm not that heavy the kid needs to get in shape. "I'm OG Dub-J!"

"That is a stupid name." I once again voice my reservations.

"Well you know what?"He asked, we were out the door at this point "Fuck You I'm keeping it."

The boy carried my to a dark van. I know that van. That was the same van CJ used to rob some houses. At least the kid didn't come to pick me up on a Faggio moped.
 
13
I sat o the floor next to the passenger seat. Johnny in the driver seat looked at my funny.

He sat in that laid back manner, Elbow in the open window, seat reclined one hand on the wheel.


"I don't want anybody seeing me." He give me a shrug at that. Started the van and put it in gear.


"You going the wrong way." I may not be in position to look outside by I felt we were going right in the direction of the city"Ganton is the other direction."


"I aint driving thru Ballas hood." I had nothing to say at that. I kicked myself for forgetting that. "Your crib right?"


"Yes, at first then you will drive me somewhere else."


"What I'm yous driving bitch now?"He said"Cause I Aint!"


"You are doing me a solid."


"Yeah what in it fo me?"


"My gratitude."


"Shit..." He looked me up and down at that. I was curled up in a ball at the moment, so hes eyes didnt travel far. For the first time in my life I got that look from a guy. It didn't take a genius to figure out what he meant. I just stared at him. The van stood at a red light. He was looking at me, I kept staring, his smile dropped a little. I kept staring. The smile dropped all the way. I kept staring. He turned his face forward. I kept staring.


"I was only playing" I kept staring.


"You are one scary lady." I kept staring


"I'm sorry I did what I did." I stopped staring.


"Apology excepted" I looked at the radio. It was blazing some techno/electro song. I didn't peg Johnny for a techno fan.


"You in to the stuff?" I said pointing at the radio.


"Knob fell of."he gave a shrug,"Stuck on the station."


"You can turn it off." I said


"Oh yeah you right." He turned the volume all the way down. I rolled my eyes.


"So you in to the Rap game?" He asked as the van started rolling again.


"About as much as anybody."


"I have two tickets for Madd Dogg concert." He was looking forward but he did notice my raised eye brow.


"I can sell you them cheap." Good save, Johnny good save. I only half boght it.


"I is asking cause that was some mad rhymes you was doing." Now all my attention was on him. I did remembered singing, but I was underimpression I did it quietly enough that no one heard it over all the gun fire.


"Some one heard that?" I could say I was embarrassed but it was more curiosity then anything else.


"Lady the whole willowfield heard you, Some Glen Park too."


"Oh?"


"You stumble in and bump yo head If not fo me you be dead!"He Rapped the words. "That some killa rhymes. Right there!"


"Thank you." I didn't know what else to say at that.


"I go crazy call me superman. I'm alive and well holding yo hand. Keep you by my side with super might. Kryptonite!" He was smiling all the way through the words. He looked like he had fun rapping "But why superman better say She-Hulk!"

"Do I look like She-Hulk?"

"You you only need to lose some flab and yeah you do." You would think it him saying something about my fat would touch a nerve. It didn't. I could not recognise myself it the mirror. I was working myself to the bone just not to think about it. I cared not how other seen me.

"I didn't wrote the words, Its just a song I heard." The song is one SF Debris uses for Star Trek Enterprise reviews. I wasn't going to say any of that to him. "Ok tell me what people are saying beside my singing Rock song no one knows about."

"Rock not Rap?"

"Focus what are people saying?"

"A load of bullshit. They say you are bulletproof. One Ballas told someone he emptied his Tec-9 in yous. You jost reloaded your AK and shot him. Where did you get a K?" Now as he said it, I seem to remember coming under fire while I reloaded.

"He survived?"

"Said he played dead. After you shot him. Was out of bullets anyway." He gave a shrug at that "Where you get the AK"

"Some Ballas had it."

"And he gave it to you?"

"I took it out of his cold dead hands."

"No Shit?"

"No shit." Focus. "What else are they saying? Full story. I was there I know what I did and saw" well not really I was quite high at the time. No I'm not going to tell him that."

"Full story?"

"We have time you are driving to avoid Ballas and Vagos turf, we will be here awhile."

"Ok so the full story. Vagos roll in on Willowfield. Shit load of them. The is trying to take it from the Ballas." So far I fallow, a gang war." Then the Ballas roll in to kick them out of the turf. Then You show up. You is capping everybody! Right"

"Everything in Yellow orPurple that has a gun." I clarified.

"Yeah You did good for the Families." Ok that misconception needs to die right here and now.

"I would shoot every one in Green with a gun."

"wat?"

"I was shooting at anything that was shooting." The next thing I was going to say could backfire. "Tell anyone that I Saskia Jefferson is a peace keeper. I keep the peace. You disturb the peace you get capped."

"A'right. So anyway there is a gang war and you show up you are capping everybody left and right. There is no stopping yous. Fifty bullets and you still don't go down. Thats were I say bull shit."

"Five."

"five what."

"Hospital people pulled 5 bullets out of me." I unzipped my hoody and shown him my vest. "See this It saved my life. I had a bullet in forearm."I pointed to a dark spot."I had a bullet in my shoulder."I pointed to another dark spot on my skin."One in my tight one in my calf one in my upper arm." I pointed to each spot.

"How did you fucking did all that?" The van swerved a little he was paying far to much attention to me. Horns were honking from every direction.

"Girl has to have her secrets." Drugs and lots of them.

--------------------------------

Johnny regalled my with tall tails of what I did. I don't remember bashing a Vagos head in with a my buttstock. I didn't remembered ripping a Ballas balls off with my bare hands. But all in all what he said sounded about right. Vagos were calling me El Poli Psicópata, I understood that last word, Ballas were calling me Killa Cop. that last one was not terribly inventive. Problem was most people were calling that person by name. Saskia.

"Not sleeping where I live today."

"Why?"

"I just killed ten people."

"They say you killed fifty."

"It was closer to ten, I shot more." Ok time to get one more favour out of Johnny.

"J-dub?" His chest puffed up by the you of his name.

"Yeah."

"I need you to pick something up from my crib, then I need to drive me to the flood Control Tunnel."

"Why?"

"Will you?"

"Shit, Yeah why not. What you need?"

"Its under the mattress its the only thing there. You will recognise it when you see it"

"Cool." Just like that? Either he is really stupid or I have a lot of street cred.

It was soon after he stopped the van and ran outside. He was back in under a minute.

"Shit you coulda told me you needed a piece." The SMG that I found was in his hand."Next stop flood control tunnel.

"Stop under a bridge when you get there."

--------------------------------

I got out under my own power. There was a cardboard box there. How convenient. Sitting on it made it flat. As good a thing to sleep on as any. I reached in my pocket and pulled my wallet out.

"Here you go, get yourself a beer or something."

"Wow! 500 buck! Thanks Lady." He looked at me as I tried to get myself confortable on my cardboard bed. "Wait you donna sleep here?"

"I can't go to my place." I said."We been over this."

"What about a hotel?"

"Hotels want photo ID They would find me under an hour."

"You a cop go to the cops."

"I don't trust them." I really didn't. I was new, I had zero friends there. The people how could be called my friends if you stretched the definition a bit, where not high enough to protect me. Why yes I am being paranoid thanks for asking.

"Shit Lady yous 'aint staying here OG J-dub Got yo back!"

"Wasn't it Dub-J?" I didn't know why I ask that.

"Whatever. I Have a place for you."

"Really? What You going to drive me to Groove Street?"

"Nah, I'm driving you to the retirement home my Mommas Mommas Momma live. No one fucking goes there." I couldn't fault that logic. Well I could but I was going down from Painkillers at this point.

"Yeah ok."retirement home sounded a far better hiding place that under the bridge. You ever slept under a bridge? I did, it sucks. "Help me up"

"What, why is you trusting me?"

"Because if you sell me out I will hand you on your entrails."That was an empty threat. If he sold me out. I'd be dead.

"That's cold. That's nasty. That's scary. It is true what they is saying."

"And what are they saying?"

"Saskia is out of her fucking mind." I started laughing. I laughed all the to the retirement home. He had no idea how fucking true that was. Both figuratively and that was the actual funny part literary.

"Saskia Jefferson"I pointed at my head "doesn't live here any more."
 
14
The retirement home was in a word. Depressing the orderly at the door just waved us through, without asking anything. The inside sleeped of old people faded wallpapers and worn out rugs. This establishment did nothing to change my opinion that this sort of a place was just an old people dumping ground.

"Ok My Mommas Mommas Momma is very old," OG J-dub informed me before he put his hand on one of the doors "Doesn't hear so well, She also thinks I'm my father. Roll with it."

"Hey Nanna!"As we walked in my guide yelled at an elderly "Its me, Johnny."

"Ain't you dead."Asked the woman looking at him.

"No I ain't!"

"Then you owe me 1000 bucks for the funeral!" The lady shot back, as positive first impressions go the lady just made one."Who is this?" she asks looking at me.

"That's my friend Saskia."

"How do you do Ma'am." Courtesy costs nothing, as they say.

"What a polite young lady." She turned to him. "Bout time you got rid of that hair-brained whore, that Mishone was never good enough for you. I'm surprised you did get crabs from that skank."

"That's my mother you are talking about!" Uuu family drama! I need some popcorn.

"Your mother your fathers wife is just stupid and ugly. I don't need to worry about her. Only someone as dumb as your father my son could ever take someone like her. She must have made my son really drunk for them to have you. Also tell Lucas to get his lazy ass in gear and pay me a visit. I haven't seen the deadbeat in years."

"Lucas is my Grand Dad you know him!" He said to me. "Saskia will be saying the night some people are looking for her." He spoke far louder while addressing the lady.

"Not in my room she is not! Also I'm not deaf you don't need to yell. She can sleep in the room next door Betty died yesterday so its free."

"Thank you ma'am."I said "I do appreciate it"

"You are not pregnant are you?" That was a strange question to ask of me.

"No ma'am not that I know off."

"Good. You better dump Johnny's sorry ass you deserve better. My Grand Son is not worth a damn!"

"I'm your great grand son, you old bat." Dub-J said quietly through gritted teeth.

I don't think it was the drugs talking but I felt quite fond of the lady. I didn't remembered much of my own great grand mother. But the lady got shot in the head in 1944. The doctor said there was nothing to be done. The wound was fatal. She died in 1991. Her daughter my Grand mother the doctors called her condition as terminal. First time in 1941 then somewhere in the seventies then in 2007. Three times the charm. They got it right the last time. The doctors said she had cancer and she needs chemotherapy. Granny told them to and I quote: about time and go fuck yourself. Yup. Both of them would find this little old lady interesting conversation partner.

-------------------

I woke up in the early hours of the morning. I took a quick shower and vacated the premisses as soon as humanly possible.
I was happy to find out I was not loopy, the drugs must have been out of my system by now.
What do I do next?
The precinct was a good place to start. I doubt any Ballas or Vagos would try anything. And having my head on straight I felt confident I could survive any encounter with with my fellow officers.
It was only a bus ride away.

------------------------

There are no city buses in Los Santos. Who knew? I took a cab.

-----------------------

The moment I'd walked in the HQ there was a lot of yelling.

"The fuck were you!?!" That was Richards. I could say I am sorry I could snap back or I could deflect.

"Aww You do care." Deflect was the funniest out of the three.

"We were about to roll in on Ganton with the whole precinct!" Well it didn't work as intended.

"Actually Richards here called for volunteers." Tenpenny was also there with his little cheerleader squad Pulaski and Rodriguez or was it Ramirez I was 99% shure his name starts with an 'R'. "He got two."

"Sir thank you for volunteering." I told Tenpenny.

"Oh I would go either way, Me Pulaski and Hernandez." Welp Hernandez doesn't start with an 'R' "He got your two Trainee buddies. Mendez and Clay couldn't be more happy to put their heads on the line for you."

"I will thank them the first chance I get." I would actually It was something like a week since I last saw any of them.

"Then they found out operation save Saskia consisted of 6 people."My god it speaks, its the first time I heard Pulaski say a word in my presence. You would guess he would comment while I beat that guy tided to a chair. I would too. We would both be wrong. "They got cold feet after that. You have some shitty friends." Like you better when you keep your mouth shut. Ass hole till the end. That takes some dedication.

"They are young they will learn." I hoped. "So whats on the agenda today?" I directed my question to Richards.

"Richards pinched the bridge of his nose." Tonight you are riding shotgun with officer Seaborne, Night shift."

"Cool." I said"Have I meet him? I'm not good with names."

"You haven't meet her. And in fellow female officer. Listen to her like you do to me. She is a good cop."

"So you mean listen to her," Needling Richards is fun, he did get me beat up that one time "as opposed to just drive your ass around while you say jack and shit to me."

"As I said Richards, Diamond in the Rough." Tenpenny said that in a jovial tone."I need to ask the sarge my crew gives you a training day in C.R.A.S.H. I think you will like it."

"Thank you sir." Somehow I couldn't find it me to be grateful for that.

--------------------------

I had a whole day to kill before the night shift. So I went to the HQ liberty. I read about French prince that was asking what was he doing in a cemetery. It was a play written by someone called Willy Swingapike.
It took me a moment to figure out it was this world version of Shakespeare. I put the thing back on the shelf.
I tried TV next. Galaxy Quest the New Crew, was an interesting show, an obvious parody of Star Trek TNG.
However I did not remembered John Luck Pickerd getting some many lap dances from blue Neptune Animal Women. I didn't know what was I expecting. The game Gyruss in this world was called They Crawled from Uranus. So the above was to be expected. Then again they did knew what lightsaber is. I wondered if this worlds Star Wars were mady by Mel Brooks. If it was I had high hopes for the Prequel Trilogy when they make in in the next 8 year.
Something to look forward too.

But the time for my pursuit of high quality entertainment was soon at the end.
Night shift was about to begin.

--------------------------

Officer Seabourne was an corpulent short black woman in her late forties or late thirties. We were going at what she called faggot hunt.
Turned out it was exactly what it sounded like.

We were trying to dissuade the local gay community from having sex in the bushes around the beach. Already wrote up 3 tickets for indecent exposure. Cheap ass bastards couldn't any of the afford a room. Guess they didn't want to show their photo ID at the desk.

After yelling at an accountant looking fellow and a guy that looked like a construction worker, to go somewhere else for 5 minutes. I got back in to the car with a question.

"Ma'am, Why is Richards not here?"

"There is no single men on the force that would take this assignment of his own free will."she said keeping an eye out on the streets. Her dedication, or at the very least the apperance of one was refreshing after Richards." Those that do no other guy on the force wants to be around them."

"Is Richards homophobic?" I asked

"Is he what?"

"Does he hate fags?" I used small words.

"God hate fags."

"If he does why did he made them."

"Guess its one of gods little jokes. Like periods and mexican food." she didn't crack a smile saying that. I dropped the subject.

"Here we go again." I said pointing to a couple walking in the bushes and looking over their shoulders.

"Well fetch girl." I rolled my eyes, and went running after one more indecent exposure ticket.

----------------------

I got back in the car quite out of breath.

"Did they got away?" I did not like the smug in Seaborne's voice.
"Yup,"Both of them were younger than me. And both of them were skinny. Being build like a brick shit house is not conducive to running. Who knew, answer was everybody since forever. "If I had your tits I would have two black eyes right about now."

"If you had my tits you would have a rich husband." This was going to be a long night.

"Look two more." Seaborne pointed."The small guy you wont get but the fat one I have full confidence in you."

With a sigh I got out once again. The night is getting longer by the minute.
 
"Hey Nanna!"As we walked in my guide yelled at an elderly "Its me, Johnny."

"Ain't you dead."Asked the woman looking at him.

"No I ain't!"

"Then you owe me 1000 bucks for the funeral!" The lady shot back, as positive first impressions go the lady just made one.
Agreed. :D
"Then they found out operation save Saskia consisted of 6 people."My god it speaks, its the first time I heard Pulaski say a word in my presence. You would guess he would comment while I beat that guy tided to a chair. I would too. We would both be wrong. "They got cold feet after that. You have some shitty friends." Like you better when you keep your mouth shut. Ass hole till the end. That takes some dedication.

"They are young they will learn." I hoped.
To be fair, with your reputation they probably expect to need at least twenty guys to pull you out of the kind of thing you'd need to be rescued from.
Officer Seabourne was an corpulent short black woman in her late forties or late thirties. We were going at what she called faggot hunt.
Turned out it was exactly what it sounded like.

We were trying to dissuade the local gay community from having sex in the bushes around the beach. Already wrote up 3 tickets for indecent exposure. Cheap ass bastards couldn't any of the afford a room. Guess they didn't want to show their photo ID at the desk.
You'd think they'd get wise and not do this where the police patrol through but... GTA.
It occurs to me that the westboro baptist church or equivalent may be even worse in GTAverse than it is in real life. I'm not sure how that's possible. :o
 
15
As random thoughts go, I had the most random one ever. Here I was running after two guys that were likely gay and ware about to go at it like rabbits in the bushes
A fat guy and a skinny guy. Who do I know in this world matching that description? Ryder and Big Smoke. Now, that was a crack ship!

Naturally, they got away. You can't chase anyone down if you are rolling on the floor laughing. Officer Seaborne got concerned and got out of the car to check on me.
Here inquiry of what's going on was answer. with my "I'll go down with this ship." and more giggling.

--------------------

We were nearing the end of our shift as Seaborne treated me to some take outs. Donuts with whipped cream filling. She could have told me that before I bit in a one and got my uniform covered with white spots. Now it was Seaborne turn to giggle like a loon. I didn't found it funny. It took about 5 minutes before she was once again up for conversation.

"So who do you like the most?" she asked out of the blue.

"What do you mean?" I wanted some clarification.

"Out of tonight. They may be homo, but there was some fine ass meat running around." Well that's what she meant. Well looks like I'm up for some girl talk, got to play the part.

"Too bad its off the market for us." I said.

"Well maybe for me but you are butch enough that you have a chance." I could read the comment both ways. I chose to read it as a compliment.

"Thanks!" I smiled, she gave me a frown. Swing and miss, it was 50/50

"Any way I like that tall big guy in the Hawaiian shirt. I lake my men big and tall."Her voice turned dreamy "So who you pick?"

"That guy in shorts and orange T-shirt."

"That little thing?" She gave me a funny look. "He looked like a woman." Well duh, that why I picked him. "You could bench press that one!"

"That's why I picked him." No, no it wasn't. Still, play the part. I give an eyebrow wiggle.

"Heh" She looked me up and down. "Shit you could probably bench press the one I chose.

"Even if I couldn't do it that fast." I'm getting good at this play the part thing. It got another 'heh' from Seaborne.

"Plus I never bench pressed more that three hundred twenty pounds." In this body, in my real one 50kg was my record.

"Don't you know men don't like body builders?" I read her words as Bitchy.

"Don't you know fat is not in season?" I can be bitchy too, see.

"More of me to love!" she swung her hips at that.

"Same here." I said. "And I can open my own jars of pickles"

"That's were you go wrong Girl"

"You are giving me advices, why?" I asked."You have a single brother, a cousin or a neighbour you want to hook me up with?"

"Yeah I do, But they would run screaming from you."

"Haha" I dead panned at that.

"Enough chit chat, shifts over lets go home."

-------------------

As I walked in the front door, the Sargent on duty called out "The Captain wants to see you"
And that how I got here. In front of the captain's desk. I felt like being called to the principal office. Cap was not much to look at, in his sixties gray hair bored expression. He made the impression of someone just going through the motions. There was one more person there, mid twenties smartly dressed girl. She looked like a hostess or a receptionist. That practised smile, no one really buys but still infectious. I had a fake smile on me for the last 9 years. Don't play a playa.

"Hello," she extended her head to great me." I'm Helen Herren from the mayors office."

"Hello." I shook it"I'm Saskia Jefferson from the LSPD."

"Yes, I like to extend the Mayor invitation for the banquet he is organising. We already spoke with your captain so you get time off to attend the function." The words came well pronounced."Do you by chance happen to have a evening dress?"

"Now but I happen on planing on going shopping in Didier Sachs. I have some money and I guess two grand will get me something decent" I was planning on going to the most expensive shop in the city but I was not planning on getting any dresses.

"Excelent,"she turned to the captain "My office will contact you in the ext 5 work day. I'll be going now. Tat ta."

She got out after that. I turned to the captain.

"Sir permission to ask a question."

"Mmm"

"The fuck was that about?"

"Donno."He looked back down on his desk and the stack of papers on it. There were real estate catalogues sticking from under duty rosters. "IA wants to see you."

Wait, what? "Why?" I asked.

"Like they'll tell me, off you go." I took the dismissal for what it was.

-------------------------

As I walked the halls every officer I passed was giving me a wide breath. It was now that I noticed. Every body were keeping me at arms length. Some were staring at the front of my shirt wide eyed. I didn't get it.

I knocked on the door with the words Internal Affairs on them, and waited. Why were everybody giving me funny looks. Was it about the gang shooting? It couldn't be that. I hanged around with most of them the entire day yesterday. From the corner of my eye I spotted as some officer whispered something to a prostitutes ear pointing in my direction. The woman started laughing hysterically. I looked at the front of my shirt. White spots, and...

I put the two and two together. My face turned red.

"Its not what you think!!!!"I yelled "Its just whipped cream!"

"I bet it is." everybody laughed.

"From a donut!"

"So its that how its called?" More laughter.

"Fuck you all!" This whole world needs to get their head out of the gutter.

The moment I got the permission I opened the doors to the IA office.

"You wanted to see me?" The office was filled with filing cabinets. There were boxes with more files standing on top of more files. Behind a desk covered with files sat a rail thin looking man, from behind thick round frame glasses a pair of sharp eye were looking at me.

"Trainee Jefferson please sit." 'come to my parlour said spider to the fly' That was the thought I had sitting down.

"Lets have a read shall we?" He said with a predatory look.

"Yeah ok I have time." I answered smiling.

"That was not a question!" He spat. There was more venom in his voice that in any two vipers.

"Then why did it ended with shall we?" I asked.

"We ask the questions!!!" 'Well, hello Herr Flick of the Gestapo. Add some fake German accent and I have a part for you in "Alo Alo", that was one good sit-com.

"Here is one file about one person. Born May 1st 1959 in Los Santos To Merry Jefferson Nee Russel and Jerome Herbert Jefferson(deceased) as the youngest child. Two older bothers Lois and Martin both deceased. With me so far?"

The guy just read the file on Saskia Jefferson, It was from him that I learned her Mothers maiden name the name of her father and brothers. All of them save the mother, the umbrella swinging lady dead. No surprise there she did said something about them spinning in their graves.

"Yes, I'm with you."

"Good lets continue. Arrested first time at the age of seven for attempting to steal a tube of industrial glue." Well good going Saskia sniffing glue how original.

"That sounds about right"

"Do not interrupt!" I kept my mouth shut.

"Arrested again for trying to steal a can of paint at age 14." Huffing paint, why am I not surprised. "Arrested again for drug possession age 15, again at age 16 twice age 17 four times and for prostitution, charges on the last were dropped by the way. Resisting arrest drug drugs drugs vagrancy drugs drugs fleeing the scene of the crime, drugs, drugs, boberry braking and entering drugs, vagrancy drugs more drugs. And now we get to age 20. A pattern begins to emerge. Don't you think?"

"I try not to think and when I think its about nothing."That got me a stare.

"Medical records are in a similar vane. Drug overdose drug overdose abortion drug overdose, a mugging victim miscarriage drug over does etc... Again a pattern emerges." Well late miss Saskia Jefferson was a model citizen in the crack whore community. The guy was beginning to be boring. The abortion part was new, but hardly surprising.

"Then we have another file. This one tells an interesting story. Born May 1st 1959 in Los Santos. Attended LSPD HQ police officer training. Average score of 81% in theoretical and 97% in physical training. Made her first arrest on the first day of Practical training. Fine outstanding future officer." I was something like 75% certain the guy was making a point.

"You know what the clinch about those two files is?"

"They are both about me? Am I correct?"

"We ask the questions!!!"

"Who are We?"

"We ask the Questions!!!"

"They are about the same person. Reading those file I would imminently decided that is a simple case of identity theft. A plant. But I have something like 20 witness that swear that you are the same parson! I have the medical records and forensic record all saying the same thing. One day a woman woke up and decided to be someone completely different."

"Yeah ok" If this man was not a complete caricature I may have been worried. But in reality what could he do? Put me in an insane asylum? ... Ok I sat straighter at that thought. Nut house was not a place I wanted to end up in.

"No one does such a one 180 in their lives. No one is a scum of the earth trash one week and a model citizen the next?" He was smug right about now. "Who is paying you???"

So that's what he thinks is going on. Well, out of universe personality transfer was to far fetched even if true. I would go with a mental disorder.

"That question I can answer. I am being paid by the Los Santos Police Department."

"You are not going to defend you out of character behaviour. You are not going to tell me you found Jesus!"

"No one told me that I should be looking for him. I'm also about ninety nine percent certain the guy is dead already seam to read about that somewhere, public execution and all the it was quite famous."

"I will be keeping my eye on you!"

"Yeah ok but please call of the Jackie Brown character."

"I-i..."He spattered at that. "I have no idea who you are talking about! She is a figment of your drug damaged brain" Me thinks the gentlemen protest to much

"Any more questions?" I asked

"Get out!!!"

Well that happened. I got out of the office and wondered what to do now.

"Trainee Jefferson" Here come Tenpenny. "Aren't you excited?"

"About your Ride along with C.R.A.S.H. it happening. Now!"

"I just pulled a nightshift like 5 minutes ago!" I do get cranky when people push long shifts on me out of the blue. I once pulled a shift that lasted 96 hours! Work hours in security suck!

"I know That why being the great guy that I am I let you have a quick shower and change your uniform!"

"Joy" I face palmed and turned in the direction of the showers.
 
Yeah, that seems exactly like what a non-confrontational IA meeting would be like in that universe. Have to wonder what the death-rate is for internal affairs officers, how often they get murdered by the people they're investigating.
 
Yeah, that seems exactly like what a non-confrontational IA meeting would be like in that universe. Have to wonder what the death-rate is for internal affairs officers, how often they get murdered by the people they're investigating.
My own pet theory is that its actually very very low. Your garden variety IA will be just as corrupt as everybody. They will actually look for any goody two shoes.
 
Damn, this is some dynamic story. Not sure what is really going on underneath, but definitely watched. Best wishes to you.
 
Question! Will we hopefully reach 2013? Cause I want to see you rob some banks in the future... >.>
 
16
16

Here I am in the back on the driver side, Hernandez to my right, Tenpenny is driving Pulaski riding shotgun. When I got in I was only annoyed for having to pull double shift, now? I'm feeling exposed and paranoid. Will they drive me to a secluded spot and put a bullet in my head? Will I be tortured for information and then get a bullet in my head? Are they gonna make me put a bullet in someone else and then will they put a bullet in my head?

I'm getting annoyed again.

Will they just get over with the whole putting a bullet in my head so I can get some sleep! I'm tired and cranky.

You wouldn't like me when I'm cranky. I don't like me when I'm cranky.

"Where are we going?" I asked, annoyance in my voice, clear to hear. That annoyed me.

"We are going to pay some Ruskie a visit." Tenpenny answered no real inclination in his voice. "What was his name again?"

"Something starting with an L" replied Pulaski pulling out a piece of paper out of his pocket.

"There is no 'L' in Russian Alphabet." Pulaski should to know better.

"What did you just say to me Rookie!" He turned in his seat and looked me in the eyes with an angry expression. The piece of paper was in his hand.

"Give me that" I grabbed the paper.

"Iwan Władimirowicz Ławrow." I read from the paper. What stood there was 'Ivan Vladimirovich Lavrov' English transcription of Cyrillic is just annoying. I gave the paper back. "That's how you read it!"

"You speak Russian?" Tenpenny cut off any remark Pulaski could make.

"I understand and speak some of it." I answered truthfully

"How the Fuck could a ghetto rat like you speak Russian!?!" Pulaski sounded unconvinced of my claim.

"I dated Poles and Ukrainians." My answer was given with a shrug, the fact I could speak Russian as well as I like was annoying me for the last 28 years. Yes dear reader. Not being able to speak Russian well, was a pet peeve of my since age 5. What? It is!

"How the fuck that makes you speak Russian?" Tenpenny actually asked, it wasn't a dismissal like Pulaski's.

"They spoke it. I picked some things up" That was partly true.

"The fuck you did!" Pulaski was all hostility at this point.

"A zajebać ci ty spasła świnio?" I shot back. Fuck him if he wants to throw down we can do it in our native tongue. Pulaski is Polish, right?

"That's not Russia that gibberish!!!" I was about to translate to him that I just asked him 'does a fat pig like to gets bitch slapped' when Tenpenny interrupted.

"Shot up the both of you!" Pulaski sat back in his seat. I closed my mouth. "We are here."

The car stopped in front of a nice looking downtown building. It looked like the one in the Game where Russian Mob was mentioned. It made sense. As the four of us walked inside I wondered if CJ was here already. Considering the distinct lack of bullet holes in the ceilings and the walls and the floors I doubted it.

Scanning the area I noticed one person I was not expecting to see. Jackie Brown sat on the one of the lobby benches and was chatting up some guy with a two-headed black eagle tattoo on his neck.I should get a tattoo. I will start working on it the moment I get some sleep.

"Sir," I asked Tenpenny. "What's the game plan?"

"The game plan is for you to shut the fuck up and let Frank do the talking!" Pulaski opened his mouth and once again managed to annoy me. There were four of us, since entering I spotted a dozen guys in suits looking at us. We are outnumbered and he was showing descent in our ranks.

"We are to speak with Lavrov and tell him how things go around here." Tenpenny didn't comment, but give Pulaski a look. The puggy face buzz cut closed his face. "No posturing, this just a friendly visit. The outcome of it will determine the game plan for later."

"Play it cool, got it." I said and looked forward.

"We are looking for Lavrov." Tenpenny said to the nearest guy in suit. The guy pointed to a middle age looking guy sitting in the corner drinking tea. The guy didn't look like much. He was fit with intelligence eyes. I would peg him for an engineer, or a career military. He reminded me of one army captain I used to know.


"You Lavrov?" asked Tenpenny.

"Yes Sir Mister Police Officer. How can I help you?" The guy was rolling his "R's" he was purposefully talking badly.

"*Excuse Us Iwanie Władimirowiczu I and my colleagues came to begin dialogue between us.*" That was what I said to the man. I most likely made a mess out of it but I was relatively certain I used the correct honorific and spoke politely. I may not be able to speak fluently but I wouldn't insult anyone by accident. Was I out of line taking the initiative? Most likely, but I also wanted to show that I can be useful. It would help not to get shot in the head by Tenpenny if I'm useful.

"*It is surprising to be addressed in a civilized speech in this land*" The man smiled "*Interesting accent I must say*"

"*I don't speak much Russian, but I do understand some*" I smiled trying to look apologetic

"Well Officer Tenpenny," As Ławrow spoke there was no longer a hint of an accent. "I do appreciate the gesture of trying to address me so politely. So how can I help you?" He motioned for Tenpenny to sit down

"I think we can help each other." The smile on the black officers lips looked genuine.

--------------------------------

Blah blah money this, Blah blah supply routes that, jap jap status quo. Ławrow and Tenpenny were talking, about how the city works what they could do for each other, and what they wouldn't be able too.

I couldn't be bothered to listen to them. Russian Mob in the game was never a factor. They got one crummy mission in game. Yes it was a fun mission with a lot of shooting and car chases, but it was only one. After CJ and Big Smoke had a shoot-out with them, the Russians were never heard of since.

I took grate care not to look at Pulaski that was constantly glaring daggers at me. It failed to impress. He wasn't as scary as my dad, and couldn't even hold a candle to some people I know, or known. Pulaski was in my personal opinion a solid 'Meh'. So I occupied my time looking at the architecture and internal decoration of the building we were in. You can't look at a room without looking at the people in it.

Jackie Brown continued chatting up the guy she was when we got in. She was her fake cheery self, the guy she was talking was giving her his polite interest. It was clear to anyone he was not interested in anything she was selling. The other suits in the room were giving some attention to Tenpenny and Ławrow, but they stopped something like half an hour ago.

The suit didn't look as bored as I was feeling, guess they didn't pull a double shift just now, must be nice. They are discreetly exchanging glances between themselves and Ławrow.

Having nothing better to do I tried to decipher what was going on. As tired as I was, knowing what is going on between the armed people that surround you is only logical. Wouldn't take a genius to figure out who was the focus of attention. Surprisingly 4 armed officers of the law were not the focus. The focus was Jackie Brown.

Thinking about it, it was not at all surprising. If the woman was bringing up red flags in my tine mechanized infantryman head, she would be, obvious to a bunch of mobsters that were doing this for a living.

The mob guys positioned themselves in a way that no matter where the woman would try to run it would be pointless. She was already trapped and she didn't even know it.

"Well I guess that would conclude our meeting, Mister Tenpenny, I hope this is a beginning of a beautiful friendship and mutually beneficial cooperation." Ławrow was a good conversationalist, I'll give him that.

"Right back at you." Tenpenny spoke plainly and straight, I'll give him that.

Everybody got up after that. Pleasantries were exchanged and our group begun moving to the exit. As we did the mobsters started to move slightly. They were getting ready to pounce on Jackie that for all intents and purposes looked oblivious to the fact she was about to get grabbed.

I asked myself 'do I care?' my brain gave me an answer I very much didn't care for

'yes I care!' She maybe a CI or undercover cop that is bad at her job, but won't sleep well if you walk out of here and leave a twenty something skinny girl alone with people that most likely will do bad stuff to her.

"One moment please" I said to Tenpenny. With a long sigh I changed direction and walked up to Jackie.

"Hey Jackie!!!" Is said loudly hooking my arm around her. She let out a frighten yelp in surprise "Fancy finding you here!!!" I looked the tattooed guy in the eyes.

"You mind terribly if I take her away?" I asked smiling sweetly while still holding my arm around Jackie.

"Not terribly" he deadpanned. Translation: Yes I mind but I will not stop you.

"Great!!!" I started walking in the direction of the exit. I had my arm still around her. I half dragged half carried the smaller woman. She was practically unresponsive there under my arm. Her objections of being dragged were halfhearted at the very best.

Tenpenny, Pulaski and Hernandez were looking at me funny. The room full of Russian gangsters were scrutinizing my every step.

As I reached the threshold of the building I whispered to the smaller younger woman's ear.

"You have been made before I even got in the room." at those words her whole frame went rigid. "If it wasn't for the 4 armed LSPD officers in the same room as you, they would be doing bad things to you at the moment."

I flagged down a passing Taxi, open the door and shoved the girl inside.

"Drop her of behind the Vinewood sign" I gave the driver 10$, closed the door and turned to other officers.

"In the car now!" Tenpenny ordered Pulaski gave me a smug look.

-------------------------

"You better explain yourself right the fuck now!" Tenpenny wasn't yelling his voice was just naturally loud.

"I did say I speak some Russia." I played dumb. It came easy to me at the moment.

"Not that the girl at the end!" I went over what I just did in my head.

"Sir I don't know why you mean." Did I just lead someone out of a room full of armed Russians that wanted that said person?

"You go up to some skirt that was talking to a Gangster on his own turf and just put her under your arm and walk away!?! And you also challenged the said gangster to do something about it!!!" Not only that but I did it to a person that I have no reason to like.

"Well I…" I'm no hero, never was. What I just did was my big damn hero moment. The fuck is wrong with me?

"Explain now!" It was Pulaski voice that got me out of my spiraling thoughts.

"I just took a would-be rape victim out a room full of armed gangsters." Wow that was some lovely line. This lie was perfect! "They were eyeballing her for something like half an hour!" I'm so pleased with myself right about now. "It doesn't take a genius to put two and two together."

"Oh" Tenpenny looked like he just noticed something obvious

"You did that to stop a rape?" Hernandez sounded somewhat surprised if please.

"Why the fuck would you?" 'wait what?' Pulaski didn't just say what I think he said.

"Pulaski," I said forcing myself to sound calm."I don't think I understood you. Please rephrase what you just said"

"Are you deaf as well as stupid?" He spat. "Why the fuck would you pull such a stunt!"

I unhook my gun holster from my belt and handed it to Hernandez. Even if surprised he took it. Tenpenny noticed my action.

"Did you just called doing my job a stunt?" I asked there was more force in my voice. I was staring holes in the back of Pulaski head.

"John I'll hold your gun for a moment." Tenpenny picked up on my intentions before Pulaski did. He drove the car in an isolated yard we wouldn't be observed by anyone here.

"What?" Pulaski asked his boss.

"We are about to resolve an disagreement between colleagues." I said "Or are you apologizing"

"Oh ok." He just connected to dots. His gun landed in Tenpanny outstretched hand. "I'm about to put a rookie on her place."

I was out of the car before he stopped talking. I unbuttoned my uniform shirt and got out of my armor vest. I noticed Tenpenny eyes getting slightly bigger at looking at the state of the half destroyed Kevlar chest plate. Pulaski just unpinned his badge.

"Bring it Bitch" He took a boxing stance facing me. "Let's dance."

I smiled.
 
17
17

Boom!

Remember the last time I went fisticuffs with an officer of the law? I only really remember parts of it.

Boom!

I remember how of every punch I blocked 3 hit their mark. My brain was rattling in my skull. I was seeing stars and misplacing teeth with every hit.

Boom!

I remember how in my desperation to not get hit I went full in and was rewarded with more of a beating.

Boom!

I got the fiercest ass whooping I experience.

Boom!

I remember waking up with one of the worst headaches ever.

Boom! Boom! Boom!

Fighting Pulaski was nothing like that. His guard had more holes in it that Bonny and Clyde did. His moves were sluggish, his punches he couldn't telegraph them more if he gave me a written plan with pictures included.

Boom! Boom! Boom!

In every confrontation, you will ideally play to your strength as you try to mask your weaker aspects. People with longer reach you get close and personal with. Smaller people you held at distance. Faster opponents you try to drag in the horizontal with you, trying to over power. Slower opponent, your job is to avoid the last.

Don't get me wrong. Pulaski is no push over. His punches had power, his moves were coordinated, and his stance and foot work solid. He could also take a punch. He was shrugging off punches I know could brake bone. He also had a lot of determination.

Boom! Boom! Boom! Boom! And Boom!

All that meant was that I was beating him like a drum.

The only person that was having more fun than me at the moment was Hernandez.

"You want to back down now buddy?" The concern in the Espanic officer's voice was so fake, it made me laugh.

"You better listen to your friend there." I chuckled. "If say 'please' and 'sorry' I will stop hitting you before this ends in a Knock out!" See here? I'm a magnanimous person.

"Sorry, I gonna brake your face and please be well soon after I get you in my hands" That was the approximation of what he said. Translated from busted lip and missing teeth speech. I also cut out all the times he paused catch a breath.

"Suit yourself, but remember you are out of breath and I'm not even winded." If I had to put a label to my current condition I would call it comprehensively warmed up. But I don't like labels. I suck at labeling stuff.

Tenpenny looked like he was hovering between annoyance and boredom. I decided to be a bit more entertaining.

"Oh come on man are you even trying anymore." I blocked a haymaker, redirected a straight right and dodged a left hook.

"Just one good hit that's all I need." Pulaski said, or it was what I guessed he was trying to say.

"Really?" I put my hands down at that. "Fine!" my hands were behind my back.

Pulaski did not jump at the chance, wary of it being a bait. That pushed him up one notch on my intelligence scale for him. He was now at minus fifty seven. He approached cautiously, his guard up. I did not move a muscle. He went for it.

'Auu'

The punch wasn't bad, Right hook to the jawline. I took worst form men, and women, better that this fraction of a man.

I rolled with it spun and went for an elbow hit. In real fights you never spin, its flashy gives you little and makes you lose eyes on the adversary. My elbow only kind of grazed his shoulder.

"I get my hands on you I will make you squeal like a bitch!!!"

"Really?!?" I jumped back from another wild haymaker. "Didn't you learn anything? Casual dismissal of sexual assault is the reason we are having this conversation. Cut down on the Pulaski is a pervert and a creep crap." I gave him a fair warning.

"I will pin you down face in the dirt and make you take it in the ass!!!" He spat. Well sort of. Being out of breath and with busted lip makes it hard to, make a good facial expression.

You can clearly see he is really asking for it. I went all in. Quick jabs and body strikes. Knees to the tights and sides. I forgot about defense. It was a slugfest. If very much one sided. He hit me once or twice when I hit him something like twenty, I wasn't exactly counting. He backpedaled all the way. I let him get some distance.

"You want to talk some nasty disturbing shit!!!" I yelled, he found one of my buttons. Violence towards women. Was a big no-no in my book. Sexual violence was for me like someone giving me permission to stab them and not feel bad about it afterwards.

A straight kick to his chest made him lose his footing and fall down by the wall.

As he was climbing up to his feet I grabbed a fist full of his hair and introduced is face to the wall, repeatedly.

"Know your place you pudgy face bitch!" His face made contact with the wall yet again. "You got nothing!" I punctuated the sentence with a hit to a kidney. "Between the two of us the only ass getting any action will be yours when I ram my fist up it!!!" Ok that one was disturbing. I never been so violent in my life.

"Enough!!!" Tenpenny ordered.

"But I'm not finished." I protested, I put on a good show but my heart was not in it. I actually wanted to stop. "Sir"

"Then finish it."

"Ok" I was so glad. I was afraid of what more could happen.

Spin kick to the Pulaski face ended that conversation. Enough was enough. I was no monster, and here I threatened a man with rape! The fuck is wrong with me.

"Pick him up and put him in the car!" Tenpenny ordered. Hernadez moved to help me drag the unconscious man.

"Hernandez, don't help her" Tenpenny stopped him "She made a mess. She cleans it up."


--------------------------------


Pulaski got dropped off at the All Saints Hospital. I got dropped off on the train tracks by my house. I was tired I was cranky I just wanted to go to bed. Johnny, or Dud J-Lo or however he liked to call himself, rounded the corner full speed. He spotted me and made a dear in the headlights expression. It lasted a moment. Then his expression turned smug. Spinning on the spot he turn his back to me.

Seconds later four Ballas rounded the corner full sprint. I didn't had the time nor the inclination for this bullshit.

"Ma Sistah from nother Mistah Is here having my back." Johnny flashed a gang sign at the quartet. My presents gave the gang bangers pause. But it was far from making them drop what their biff with dear ol Johnny. "You punk ass bitch tits ass niggas aint got the balls to mess with the fly ass bad ass best friend of Saskia 'Motherfucking Ballas Blasting, psycho Vagos ending Strong Pimp Hand of Gonton' Jefferson. You cock sucking bus…"

My fist cut short whatever he was about to say. Johnny went out like a light. The four Ballas looked like they were in various stages of shock.

"I don't care what this is about but you are not killing him if I'm around."

"Why you do that?" Asked the Banger in front of the group.

"I'm a peacekeeper! Johnny yelling his mouth off was disturbing the peace." I grabbed Johnny by the ankle and started dragging him "I put a stop to it."

"Leave his ass to us!" The leader argued but it was only posturing. His companions were not going try to have a go at me. He also looked like he was like breathing.

"Haha No"I said going on my way."I leave him here and he gets stabbed something like fifty times. I'm a peacekeeper you don't want to disturb the peace in my presents."

"Fuck da Police!!!" Came from one of them the moment I turned my back.

"I heard that one before, tell another." None of them did.

I'm going to bed.

----------------

I stood in front of my apartment building. Somehow the Gran Prix level motor bike I stole still stood there. I looked at the sky. It looked like it was going to rain. I drag Johnny in the hall way. No reason for him catching a cold. I got in my apartment and was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

As I slept I dreamt.

I dreamt of a burning city. I dreamt of a sea of dead bodies. The dead died as they stormed barricades of the defenders. The desperate last stand of the uniformed people. The defenders were also dead. Dead to the man. Body of Saskia Jefferson sat back to back with the body of Frank Tenpenny. Saskia's mouth was saw shut. Franks hands were cut off. Their lifeless eyes looked to the sky.

I woke up startled!

"What a mind fuck!" I said to the empty room "I'm getting a tattoo!"

So I did.
 
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'Pity' and 'Fool' was now tattooed on my knuckles. Nice!

What? I liked it. I also had the Polish Eagle tattooed on my back. I had to find a coin store, and buy a silver 200 zloty coin so the artist could get the thing right. The coin cost 10 dollars! I call it robbery! I over paid by factor of something like 2500! The coin now hanged an a silver chain around my neck. I like silver, gold is too ostentatious.

My next stop was "inside track" betting shop. I betted on the ponies for a bit. It was frankly depressing. It worked list like in the game. Out of 5 horse race each had the exact same chance of winning. I put 700$ in and got 1100$ out. I spent half a day doing just that. 5 hours later I got out with a grand total of 47345$ Dollars to my name.

Didier Sachs is one expensive place. I actually needed to wave my badge at them before they let me in. Waving a wad of bills alone didn't grant me entry.

"Can I help you?" the woman working there looked at me like something she would scrapped off the sole of her expensive looking shoe.

"Yes I'm a police officer and was invited to attend the Ball at the Mayor Mansion. I need some formal wear." 'I will also give you a ticket first chance I get' I didn't say the last part out loud. Stuck up bitch!

7000$ dollars later is stood in my brand new Tweed three piece suit. Tuxedo packed in the bag in my hand. Why didn't I go with a dress you ask?

I had bandages on that covered more skin. The long silk dress had opened back. You could see my ass crack in that thing. I was utterly unable walk around in heels, and I refused to put on a mini!

There was also the added problem of not being able to look myself in the mirror. With the three piece suit and the tux I at least remembered they look good on me.

Having done with shopping I went to do the one thing I dreaded!


-------------------------------


"You think you so scary, do you?!?" I said with all the bravado I could muster.

"You think I'll back down from you!?! You wrong!" I boasted "I will brake you in! You will put you under me and you will be purring like a kitten!!!" I struck a pose and pointed my finger.

People in the windows were looking at me. Some were munching on popcorn or having a swing of the beverage of their choice.

The target of my proclamation was not impressed. It just stood there being a Grand Prix motor bike.

"Fuck you all I'm doing it!" Yelled at my audience.

I straddled the bike put on a helmet I got in ProLaps for 40 bucks.

I was off to face my demons!


------------------------------


You know after getting the 'don't fall off' part down. Riding a bike was like riding a bike. Just faster, and you didn't have to peddle that much.

I did my practice in the salvage yard. Fewer kids laughing at me there. After few hours practice I felt confident enough to drive in the night traffic. After an hour I tried my luck on the freeway.

You know what?

"THIS IS FUCKING AWESOME!!!"

I love my stolen bike so much. I never had the feeling of such power between my legs…



Did I just say that?

This world and all it innuendo is getting to me. I don't care! I'm doing two hundred on the freeway! The rev meter is all the way up to eleven!

"Woo Hoo!!!" I just over took a semi like it was standing still

"Woo Hoo!!!" I just drove between a station wagon and a sabre.

"When I feel heavy metal!!!" I'm singing Blur Song 2. Around 200 kg of NRG 500 motor bike under me, producing about as much horse power. This thing is heavy metal incarnate feel free to argue the point but I will not hear you! I will be a mile away before you even open your mouth. I'm doing five kilometers every minute. That's 190 mile per hour in Neanderthal.

"Woo Hoo!!!"

*CRASH!!!*

"wooooo uhh."

I got up from the asphalt.

Why is there a pile up behind me?

Why do I have problems walking in a straight line? Also why does remaining vertical require so much work.

"I need to practice some more!"


---------------------------------------------


I kept to narrow dirt roads driving home. As I got past the forum the universe corrected itself. It was no longer at a 30 degree angle nor was it spinning. I was glad for that. I wasn't glad that the bike gave up the ghost just before the bridge. Turns out having a big hole in your oil radiator is not a good thing. Also you should check your vehicle for any and all damage after crashing in the back of a Perennial before you get back on your bike.

Kind off obvious in hindsight.

"Hey, Saskia! Hey, Saskia!" what now? I turned in the direction of the voice.

"That's Miss Saskia!" I said to the group of kids running in my direction.

"Why is there a windshield wiper sticking out of your helmet." The kid completely disregarded my comment.

"What?" I asked as my hand reached up to my helmet. There was something there that shouldn't .

I stopped and took my helmet off.

"There is a windshield wiper sticking out of my helmet." I stated the obvious. I wondered for a moment how did it get there and why was my skull still in one piece.

"Miss Saskia! Miss Saskia! Miss Saskia!" a little girl jumped up and down while holding up her hand.

"Yes? What do you want?"

"Why you hit Johnny and dragged him to your place last night?" Ok something in the wording of the question didn't sound right.

"My momma said is because you so big only way for you to get a boyfriend is to whack him on the head with a club and drag him to your cave. Miss Saskia why do you want a boyfriend? " I was about to say something, I don't know what. When another kid started speaking.

"You need mommy and daddy to have babies. Miss Saskia wants to make babies." The kid was very proud giving his theory.

"NO NO NO, Making Babies is lame. Miss Saskia too Cool for that!" Protested some girl

"Was you using him to practice killing Bang bangers on, like Theo practices playing doctor on me" The girl look six or seven, A red light flashed before my eyes.

"Who's Theo?" I asked through gritted teeth.

"Him!" The girl pointed at a boy six or seven years old. The boy was looking at his feet like their were the most interesting things in the world.

"Oh! Never mind then…"I said

"Will you let as watch you ride your bike?"

"No, the bike is broken."

"Why?"

"I broke it."

"Why?

"I didn't mean to."

"Mommy says didn't mean to is not an excuse, Mommy says only dumbasses do things they didn't mean to do."

"Don't call her a dumbass, dumbass!"

"No you dumbass!"

"No you."

"Miss Saskia will you let me ride your bike?"

"Why you hit Johnny?"

"Miss Saskia Miss Saskia."

Dear reader I had two options.

Option One: Yell at the kids to be quiet. Reason with them make them stop yelling at each other and find a constructive and level head conflict resolution.

Option Two: Forget it all leave the damaged bike where it stood. Put fingers in my ears and go home yelling LALALALALA all the way.

Like good Zen master I followed the path of least resistance.


-------------------------------


Getting in my apartment building and holding the door behind me so no ankle bitters could get in, I walked up stairs to my apartment. Someone was waiting for me.

"You again???" I throw my hands in the air, to express my annoyance.

"We need to talk."Jackie Brown stood in the hall way. For once there was no smile on the woman's lips.

"How about? NO! You oblivious incompetent bitch!" I yelled got pass her and through the door. I slammed then in her face.


"We need to talk." Came a male voice from behind me. I slowly turned to face its owner. An athletic African-American sat on my sofa. There was pistol in his hand but he wasn't pointing it at anything. My SMG was on the coffee table partly disassembled.

Sweet Johnson wanted to talk to me.

I closed my eyes hang my head and let out a long resigned breath.

"Ok fine. You want tea or something?" He may have broken in, but that was no reason to be a bad hostess.
 
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I was making tea. I was making it for a notorious gang leader.

"Sweet, you said you wanted to talk." I put pot full of water on the stove. "Will you tell me the topinc you want to address?"

"Drop the fake ass white people talk!" He spat "You was born and raised here! Act like it!"

"If you want to get out of the Ghetto, first you have to get the Ghetto out of you." I smiled, if you took Sweets picture right this moment you could put it in a dictionary right next to 'restrained rage'.

"You want to get out no one is stopping you!" He was doing his best to control himself. "I can even float you some cash to rent a place in Red Country. I'll even give you a ride."

I had no idea what his game was. If he wanted to get rid of me the pistol in his hand would accomplish it far easier and quicker. The water in the pot was warming up far too slow for my liking.

"I'm not planning on getting out of here " I mentioned around me. "I'm planning on getting the 'here' out of" I pointed my finger at my temple and smiled." 'here' The mentality needs to change for this place to change."

"The fuck you on about!?! This is where we are at! This," he pointed at gun in his hand, "and this" he pointed at his green shirt. "Is what is real!!!"

"So is this." I pointed at my uniform shirt hanging on a nail on the wall, the badge clearly visible.

"I can believe you have the balls to show your face here after what you pulled!"

"You must be more specific than that. Do you mean arresting your dumb ass brother, or shooting up Willowfield, or saving the life of Johnny the other day?"

"You really are that stupid are you?" I think I was missing something. "How could you sell your family. JH your dad dead, Lois and Martin dead your brothers. The cops shot them like animals and you put the uniform on. Are you trying to go up from a field slave to a house nigga."

So that was why Saskia's mother was so upset. No wonder, if her two kids and husband were all killed by the police and her last living child became a cop. In her place I'd be upset to.

At myself.

Both sons, dead husband dead, her only living kid a drug addict. The lady must have dropped so many balls.

Sweet stopped talking. He expected some reaction. He didn't get any. It was simple to shrug off an accusation if you didn't feel connected to it.

"Have you no decency?" He asked after a long pause.

"I was huffing paint and sniffing glue since grade school, I got busted for prostitution in High School." I pointed out what I know of the body I resided in. "Are you asking a former Crack Whore if she has decency?"

He opened his mouth and closed it.

"What about your Family?" He asked

"I woke up one day and I actually had to look for a photo ID to figure out my name." True. "A lady came to the hospital to visit me. I had no idea who she was. She was my mother."True. "Decided to get clean and get my life in order. No one can live like this."

"The fuckers killed you blood and you are now kissing their ass." He continued.

"You know Pulaski?" I asked

"Yeah, I know the racist fat pig." He spat

"He is in hospital, I put him there." That got his attention.

Closed my fist and showed him my knuckles. Word 'pity' on the right 'fool' on the left.

"I pitied the fool."

"What?" Sweet sat a bit straighter in the chair "How? Where was Tenpenny when you did that?"

"He was holding Pulaski's gun and watching. He stopped me before I showed my fist up the fat fuck ass."

Sweet let out a little chuckle. "I'm curious, in how much trouble is you in?"

"As punishment I had to drag that fat ass in the car and drop him at the hospital." I said truthfully. "That thing hanging on the wall," I pointed at my uniform,"Let's me do thing few people could. I wasted Ballas and Vagos and I think I'm about to get a medal and got invited to the mayor mansion. That uniform lets me do more good that anyone. Tenpenny likes me. That corrupt pig thinks I he can play me like a fiddle. He won't see me coming."

"The fuck! You are trying to take them down from the inside." Sweet looked thoughtful at that. "Remember if you stare in to the abyss the abyss stares back at you."

I raised an eyebrow at that.

"What?" He looked indignant "I read books!"

"Before or after you eat them?"

"Fuck you!" He said as he chuckled. He flipped the safety on his pistol to the on position. Good thing too. The pot with the boiling water to splash his face with was ready. Instead of using it as an improvised weapon I actually did made tea with it.

-----------------------------------

After bidding fare well to Sweet, I turned for the night early.

Wake up wash face get dressed. Go out take a cab to the precinct.

That was the plan. As I got out of my apartment building there was three things I didn't expect.

First was Jackie Brown.

"We need to talk." She is persistent I'll give her that.

Second was Johnny.

"Sorry about yesterday and how I acted. I hope we are cool, I got your bike fixed up for you.

Third was the NRG-500 bike I close to totaled yesterday. I swear, the thing is following me!

I pinched the bridge of my nose.

"No" I turned to Jackie. "We don't need to do anything. You need to need to fuck off already"

"Thanks" I turned to Johnny "No hard feelings."

There was a sound of a train going. Nothing new. Four guys with SMG were riding on top of it. New but not all that surprising considering where I was. Two guys on a dirt bike, in pursuit.

"Later! work to do!" I said and jumped on the bike. I didn't hear what either Jackie nor Johnny said and the whirl of the 500cc high performance engine drowned everything around me.

-----------------

Anyone playing the game remembers the mission "Wrong side of the tracks" by the virtue to being a collosal pain in the ass to complete. Back in the game the player had to ride along a speeding train, on a dirt bike with big and heavy Big Smoke slowing the bike down, and let him practice shooting at the Vagos riding to the train roof. While you dodged traffic and oncoming trains.

It was the mission that broke suspension of disbelief and immersion something fierce. Because you needed to attempt it again and again.

I meet CJ, I had no confidence in his ability to pull it off. This was a story mission. The last thing I wanted is for the world to reset, or fell apart if he failed. I have no wish to end up in Langoliers world or Ground Hog Day. A cookie for anyone getting the first reference.

Turns out that being alone on the bike, makes it go faster. Turns out driving a professional motor sport vehicle and not dirt cheap Sanchez makes chasing down train and over taking them a child's.

I zipped pass the Sanches CJ and Big Smoke were riding. They were no way close enough to their targets. The train looked like it was stationary from my perspective. I got to the tunnel with time to spare.

I drove up the hill and stopped above the tunnel entry. The train was approaching with for me felt like an agonizingly slow speed. I also remembered I was unarmed. My SMG back at my place. Pistol in the weapon lock up at the LSPD HQ.

'This is not smart'

'I'm going to die'

'Maybe the world will not end if CJ fails'

'Sane people don't do what you are about to do'

"You know what brain? We are doing it anyway!"

The bikes tire spun under me. I revved the engine and let go of the brake. The bike stood on its rear wheel as I speed down the hill. I was at 45 degree angle when the ground beneath me ended. The air time was short. My back wheel hit the first Vagos on the head, the second got a face full of my front wheel. The third was clotheslined by my bike handle bars. I lost control at this point and just slid forward, the bike swept the last Vago of his feet. By luck, the sliding bike stopped as the it fell on the gap connecting two train cars. My motion relative to the train stopped as I hit the bike.

There I was somehow sitting on the bike once again. I looked at the train car roof. The four Vagos only a red smear on it. CJ and Big Smoke riding alongside the train were gaping at me like fishes. CJ was so surprised he didn't notice the barrier that was on the tracks for some reason, and crashed in it.

He'll be fine. I crashed my bike at 200mph and just walked in off. Plus he would also act as cushion Big Smoke. That as much as he is good for.

I just jumped a bike on a train killed four armed gang members, made the protagonist looks stupid, again. And did it all looking like a baws.

I had the dumbest goofiest grin on my face.

"AWESOME!"
 
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