Mantan is depressed and ready to drift away. But some inner voice nudge him, that path from bottom is only upward. Where it will lead? One thing is clear. He has to recultivated the chaotic qi inside after the long time of negligence.
I led long D&D games offline. But Covid and my own situation stoped that. Now I want to start again but ... now as online Quest Giver. I admit, I am here not long. I lurked and read only for about month but I have ambitions to give you long quest. Admittedly slow. Because fight with depression is slow and long fight.
There are none. Yet. Probably never be. I like free form. You will be OC. To influence Mantan, main character, with situations and be part of his newly manifested inner voice. And you, dear Questors, will create his history. Slowly when needed.
As this is cultivation, there is new unit wa. 1 wa is amount of qi average person needs to boil 1 litre of water without using any technique.
New rule: In case of draw the choice will be decided by dice roll.
There are no core levels, cultivation levels or whatsoever. I don't like such distinctions as it really depends on form of cultivation. And there are so many ways. Body part, spirit, aura, weapon, tool, sences, mind... and never-ending possible combination. With tuns of different techniques with different efficiency. So how to compare? Just with competitions...
Mantan Spinney
Age: 31
Qi talent: Above avarage. Talent to increase qi capacity 14 wa per decade (avarage is 9 wa)
Current Qi state: 34 wa. 15 wa cultivated and 19 wa chaotic. Dantien detached.
Education (what is known, will be determined by you later):
* General cultivation (level ?)
* Wushu (level ?)
And lastly: I am not native english speaker. So, please excuse my attempt. I welcome corrections, I want to be better.
Boring stuff done, Quest begins:
<Get up! Get up! Get up!> said a voice inside me. Well, it is the only part of me which didn't gave up.
Yeah, I was laying on the bank of small stream for nine days straight. Without movement, only sometime drinking from the stream. Because, what's the point? Doing anything didn't made sense anymore to me.
<GET UP!> Here it went again. "Why should I get up?" I started to questing myself. Yeah, I was long alone. Was this the result? Questioning myself. <Because you want to die. And you can do it by doing something.> "... That doesn't make any sense," I reply to myself, "if I wanna die, I can just lay here and drift away. Doing nothing." Little heavy but it is the truth. <Well, and has it to be so disgusting? Look at your clothing. When someone will find you, that will be great image.>
I didn't want to acknowledge that. Yeah, as I said I didn't get up for few days. At all. Better to not describe the scene more as I am ashamed. Maybe, just maybe, I could wash myself and clothes? <Dying will be there after that too, you know.> the annoying inner voice said. And there was some truth in that.
So I slowly set up. I didn't believe myself to stand up as I didn't ate for about half a month. It made squishing sound. Disgusting. So I shuffle myself to the stream and let the water doing it's thing. Even this small exercise was painful. My muscles and joints ached. The chaotic qi, disturbed by the movement, wreak havoc in my meridians. My head was spinning. I was in great condition.
But the cold stream was nice and it wake up me from the drowsiness. I striped down slowly and with difficulties and was only able to hold the clothes in the water. Not to wash it, just soak. "It will still reek like something from the Hell of Boiling Faeces. You should it wash properly, don't you think? But for that, you will need little bit of energy. What about to eat something?"
I know there is small jujube tree about ten step from the stream. Now it was early September and the fruits started to ripe. But they should be edible.
I put the cloths on the bank and slowly sit up in the stream. Then with the hand on the tree from opposite bank I stand up. Slowly and painfully. But I did it. But then I had to stand still and do some breathing exercise to at least somehow calm the qi. Otherwise it will rapture some of my meridian nodes and I will be in agony. It was small miracle it didn't already happened. Fortunately the sun was shinning and I had few hours of afternoon left. As I was breathing and calming qi, I looked at the path to the fruit tree. 10 normal steps. In my condition I estimate it to be trip for at least hour. One way. Well, look on the end of Toukov champion. The ripe age of 31 and he is slower than year old corpse. Yeah, so prod of myself.
Now the stomach cramps. Great. But they gave me the reason to attempt the trip much more than my annoying part. I know, that even if I would lay down, the organismus would not get back to resting mode. So after doing the basic breathing wave for fifteen minutes, I went. I didn't lift the feet completely from the ground at any moment. I shuffled. Half foot putting before other foot. And next the other one. The feet on the width of my shoulders for stability, knees bend arms out. Yeah, wushu student on the move! It was humiliating to use the wushu stability principles to get 10 paces without falling. In great time just under one hour. I had to made few stops to calm qi, hearth and breathing.
But I get there. And completely unexpectedly I get the feeling of great victory. That I achieved something. I felt euphoric. But … didn't I want to die quietly laying down? Not the moment to meditate on that as I had to eat. When I was reaching for the fruit, I had to grab a branch to stable myself. The thorns pricked my thin skin in my palm. But better that than falling down, I suppose. So I held myself and with the left hand pick up few of the berries. They were sweet, I never tasted something so good in my life. At least that was how it felt. Pure bliss.
And the thorns in my right palm, they added of the feeling of life. <See, you can always die. But you can enjoy something before that, cannot you?> again that small optimistic iritating part. So I stand there, eating berries, with speed one berry per 10 minutes. I know that too fast eating wouldn't be great for my stomach. After the first berry, I repositioned the right hand to held the branch between thorns. After the second, I started the basic qi cycling as a necessity.
The small amount of external cultivated qi from the food was like water on desert for my meridians. I had stopped my cultivation long long time ago because why bother. After such time, majority of qi in my body was chaotic. That made the passive cycling dangerous for me. Very dangerous. So I had to cycle actively to give the qi direction and reduce harmful effects of chaotic qi.
It was not easy at all. The chaotic qi wanted to go in any direction but the meridians are only one way paths. And I don't mention at all my disconnected dantian. Brief inner look at the center of my qi and I was horrified. No calm ball but chaotic storm with small calm ball in the middle. Like one pea in the chaotic soup. Great.
Breath in to the belly, then lower chest, upper chest and lastly collar bones. Breath out from belly, then lower chest and then upper chest. Again. Force the qi in one direction. In front of my body travel up, in back down. The basic breathing wave and basic qi cycling. If the qi is cycled in the same direction, it will change from the chaotic to cultivated after some time. Depending of how wild it get, how much chaotic potential it had created. This basic forceful cycle didn't include hand and legs, but the qi there is forced by the main cycle to some degree.
Proper technique wouldn't work with the qi in such condition. And anyway, I wasn't able of such concentration. I will need train myself back up.
What? I will train? That is new information to me. New from me to me. Seriously great mental condition.
Vote with longer OC explanation. The inner voice is:
Noble Human Spirit = very helpful
Some small fragment manifestation from spirit of humanity. Like "Wisp of Last Hope for Self-Destructive" or "Voice of Healing for Hearth Broken" and similar.
Qi construct = helpful
Mantan suppressed his hope, optimism and dreams so much, it condensed to it's own self. It will be by nature helpfull, possible development to it's own spirit, or to be re-absorbed, or something between.
Splinter of Mantan's spirit = little harmful
Mantan suppressed part of him and it used the state of chaotic qi to separate part of Mantan spirit. Mantan will loose part of his cultivation talent to it. If Mantan will become to know that, he will want to have his spirit whole. But the splinter may have it's own ambitions.
Parasit Spirit = harmful
Some malevolent spirit used Mantan's weakened state and invited itself to his brain and spirit. But it cannot consume chaotic qi, it needs nudge Mantan to cultivate back and eating his cultivated qi.
Each choice will have more choices of its character/nature in future decisions.
I ate for nearly hour, one jujuba per 10 minutes. Sun went down and there was red sunset. With that I slowly wen back to the stream. One small step after another. With still the basic breathing wave and basic qi cycle.
When I reached the bank, I collapsed to the ground. Grinding my teeth when everything was in pain. I drank little bit and roll to the back to be able to relax little bit. The stars was out and half moon was above the tree line. I had started to detect problems in my body. Few secondary meridians raptured during the trip to the tree and back.
<What a nice night>
… that … what?
<What a nice night, isn't it? The stars. Everyone different and still the same.>
....
My mind stopped. What was that? This is more that the usual inner dialog. I was revising my qi pathways and nodes. And it started talking about stars? This was an independent though.
"Who are you? What are you?" I projected. <I don't know> it replied quietly.
It replied!
Did I got crazy? <I don't think so> it said in my mind. Well, could I trust its judgement? "How you don't know what are you?" <Well, it appears I don't know. That is all.> "You have to come from somewhere. Where you was before you came to me?" <I was nowhere else.> replied without worry and with serenity.
Fuck. I don't believe it. Something nested inside me. And I am without useable qi to prod myself internally. Great. <I mean no harm!> Yeah, yeah. Because if someone mean you harm, they are always saying truth.
Desperately I thought what to do. I had some cultivated qi in my detached dantian. There was shaky equilibrium with the chaotic qi. But If I re-attached it and continue the basic cycle, I would be probably able to use little bit of the cultivation qi.
I had no choice. If I want get rid of it, there is no other way. I turned my inside eye to the dantian, more imagination than actual eye, but qi reacts to intentions. I saw the ball of qi with storms of chaotic qi around it. Around there were rivers to and from my body. Blocked by damps from solidified qi. It took me whole summer to built them up. To hold till the end. But I had to do it to stop the passive qi cycle.
Building is slow, destroying is fast. I projected the though of crumpling old stones. And the flowing river which break though the weaker damp. It took me only half a hour to tear down each blockage. With every connected meridians pathway I felt stirring of more and more qi. I hold tightly on the basic cycle as it was the only thing to keep me from excruciating pain.
I still raptured lots of second meridian nodes and many of the smaller pathways was leaking. But I was holding. My left hand was twitching like crazy, my left thigh was on fire and dozen of similar effects in my body. After all blockages was clear I used small part of the cultivated qi to heal few of the most severe issues. Just to be able to hold on the main cycle. To kept hold on the direction of chaotic qi.
Breath in, breath out. Breath in, breath out. It was hard and used all my cultivation to hold on the basic cycle whilst I used the strand of cultivated qi to heal. I was rusty from that.
After I was back in somewhat stabilised inner state, I used the little bit strand of dwindling cultivated qi to create probing tentacle. That was a metaphor I used to pass the intent.
I started probing my brain with it. There was nothing wrong. At least nothing what would explain the voice. There was some damage from the chaotic qi too, but I was not able to afford spent more cultivated qi for healing.
The next I touched my spirit. I felt the thin spiritual threads connecting me to family, objects around me, the earth and sky. The heavens and hells. Then my spirit barrier. There I felt like there is chaotic qi storm on it. Similar to my metaphor for dantian. I tried to detect something what wasn't me. Without success. But I could image something slipping through the storms. Maybe it was just good at hiding?
Last place was my mind. It was always weird. To see yourself inside yourself. At least that was my metaphor. Me sitting on base of my skull. Now in lotus position, closed eyes, wrinkled eyebrows, and fully concentrated. There was only little bit of chaotic qi. Not surprising. I never stopped thinking, only slowed down. So only little bit of natural deteriorating. And without the passive cycling, the mind was rather isolated.
But there was a blob floating around my mind me. Like ball of fluid. "Gotcha!" The blob stoped and I get the feeling it look on the qi tentacle. Without eyes.. <Hello!> it said euphorically.
It really doesn't look like anything I know about and I get feeling of myself from it. What? Feeling of myself?
"You … you are part of me?" <I don't know. I just am. Here.> it said without worry.
"What is your first thing you remember?" <This place. I was bored as you were just laying and doing nothing. So I started to dug through your memories and senses. It is not nice, what are you doing to yourself, I must say. So I have started prodding.>
"Well, that … is my issue. Nothing for you to say about." <Your issue? If you die, I will die.> "Not my problem." I felt relieve that it was no parasite or some spirit.
<One thing changed, you have to decide now.>
I was confused. "What is there to decide?" <You cannot detach dantian now with the chaotic qi, can you?> I felt it almost grinning. Annoying little shit.
Hell of Molten Copper. It was right. The damps were not option anymore. And that meant to die in torture as the passive flow of chaotic qi. More and more inner damage. Or the long way to recultivate, expunge this irritating blob and then go back to the nothingness.
The pain was already hard to bare. Bath in molten copper would be welcomed more then more of the pain.
The long process it is.
<Success!>
That's all for today, dear questors. Thanks for reading, only two more chapters of inner working and then there will be trip to nearest town, where will be more interaction with world than just with the inner voice. And the jujuba tree I suppose.
Next time will Mantan have to decide what will he do with so much chaotic qi. For that he needs some background.
Every child in Miabor get the basic education in cutlivation, martial arts and crafting. After that he done some smaller jobs before he found profession he did for 8 years, before he grimly departed.
What was his profession?
[] Wushu instructor
Taught Basic Wushu course for children and Qiang (spear) advance class.
Win Wushu Championship of his hometown Toukov
Cycling technique for larger burst of qi
Body cultivator (strength and speed), External cultivation (Qiang) and little bit Mind cultivation (reactions)
[] Woodcarver
Crafted home items but dabbled in art projects too, but there were not large demand in the small town Toukov
Won contest in best art with wood mural of three Heavens of Purities
Cycling technique for steady and long flow of qi
Body cultivation (hands, precision), senses cultivation (eyes, touch, smell) and little bit of spirit cultivation (abstract concepts)
[] Junior Assistant for Council of Trade
Role is self explanatory, dealing with peoples, compile reports and brewing tea for his seniors
Premiant in the Administration Exams
Cycling technique for multitasking
Mind cultivation (concentration, memory, speed) with little bit of senses cultivation (ears and eyes)
[] Farmer on family lands
They had goats and large variety of grains and vegetables. When herding goats with pack of wolfhounds in the near hills, gather qi strong herbs and mushrooms.
Won strength contest in lifting heaviest boulder
Cycling technique for long qi expulsion
Body cultivation (strength, stamina) with spirit cultivation (spirit communication, aura sensing)
[] Hunter
Even if State of Maibor is cultivated land, animals are still born and do cultivate qi. Even predators. Some one has to seek them out and hunt them, or overpopulation or over-cultivation will born danger.
Won shooting contest
Cycling technique for dampening presence
Senses cultivation (eyes, ears, nose), Body cultivation (speed), spirit cultivation (aura sensing), mind cultivation (reaction)
To give him some experiences for him to go forward and to decide things.
Please vote by [x] Vote comment.
What I did the first time probably was the wrong think to do, as I cannot change it to new vote and ... maybe even delete it. Still to getting use to content creating, please excuse my beginners trouble.
Vote will be open for two days till Wednesday 20:00 with next chapter the next day. That is the tempo I would like to hold to.
Luck in your choices here in in the outside world till then, Wudo.
Mantan Spinney
Age: 31
Qi talent: Above average. Talent to increase qi capacity 14 wa per decade (average is 9 wa)
Current Qi state: 34 wa. 15 wa cultivated and 19 wa chaotic. Dantien detached.
Qi construct in mind. From his hopes, optimism, positivity and similar, things Mantan suppressed.
Crafted home items but dabbled in art projects too, but there were not large demand in the small town Toukov
Won contest in best art with wood mural of three Heavens of Purities
Cycling technique for steady and long flow of qi
Body cultivation (hands, precision), senses cultivation (eyes, touch, smell) and little bit of spirit cultivation (abstract concepts)
As I sat there, under the half moon and with the joyful irritating voice in my head, I started to consider the possibilities for my recultivation.
With the newly reconnected dantian, I wasn't even able to sleep for the decision. The passive rotation of qi would tear me to death. How would I even fall asleep?
So meditation under the stars it is. With adding bonus of taxing my mind. I was so lucky. Sigh.
The basic cycling was getting easier as the rotation in dantian add to the qi momentum. I was just directing it now. But that also meant more and more raptures in the secondary pathways with the extra momentum. Mainly in my hands, which I had knitted with new and new pathways for better and more precise woodcarving.
I made fists and tried to push the pain out of my mind. Faster I made the decision what to do, faster it would be solved. <Let me help. Put hands close to each other.> said the blob in cheerful tone. It wrapped itself around my forearms on my mind representation of me. The moment it did it, my mind was free of the pain.
"What are you doing?" I was confused what it did. <We can talk after you decide what to do. This is rather taxing, so could you speed it up?> As I turned my inner eyes to the hands, I saw the corroding of chaotic qi in the blob. Now only one dot, but it grown little bit when I was looking.
Was this a proof it was not a malignant entity? No, not now.
I started to meditate on the question what to do with the chaotic qi inside me.
From the school I know about tempering muscles, bones and even organs by harming and healing them. That might be achieved by the chaotic qi too. By repeat harm and healing, the tissue would grown resistant. I had never done that, so I would only harm myself irreparably without proper supervision. Out of the consideration.
I could expel it out. Slowly. At least I had tried basic expelling in the school as a cultivation exercise. But it would torment the outer meridian. And I never strengthened them as similar technique was useless for my wood craft. But if I slowed it, it should work.
What else? Shove it to spirit as spirit damage doesn't hurt? I would die very fast. And never reincarnate. Or I maybe become soulless devil. Not the way. The reincarnation was my only remaining hope for better life.
Cultivate it. The regular cultivation is to pull little bit of chaotic qi from outside and cycling it with already cultivated qi. The direction and intention of cultivated qi made the directionless chaotic qi to cultivated one. But this much chaotic qi already inside me? How would I even cycle without the help of cultivated qi?
So the expelling it is.
<Wait! Wouldn't it temper and strengthen your meridians if you recultivating it?>
"Yes, it would. And it would tear them apart during it." Or … Hehe. I could channel vast amount of chaotic qi to the blob, it would disperse it and I would be free from both issues. Ha.
<Really? And you think, I will stand still and took it? You cannot restrain me in any meaningful way.>
"I could try" and already started to plan the process. <Or you will miss, and so much chaotic qi here will tear apart your own mind. And I will take over. So, yes do it!>
For all thirty six heavens, it made good point. Back to expelling it.
<Wait! What about the tempering of meridians? Your regular cycling method strengthen them already, so they can withstand it easily. And you have the little bit of cultivation qi to heal to temper.>
"Why would I do so much work? And easily? You are just overoptimistic. I just want to be able to detach the dantian and go back to … sleeping to nothingness. With the smallest effort possible."
From further communication and feeling the blob directly on my inner me, I could feel better its nature. It felt like hope, like day full of possibilities, like mothers hug. That was quite strange feeling. The feeling made me sad for some reason and tears started rolling down. Even though I was full in deep meditation.
<Hush now. You have two options. Don't you thing, the tempering, even though harder and painful, wouldn't bring back little bit of accomplishment? You can achieve one last thing before your stupid end.>
Did it manipulate me? <No, I just have different point of view. Can you quicken the decision little bit, please?>
I could saw more and more chaotic qi inside the blob. It had to hurt but it gives me time even there was nothing for it in it.
One last achievement. Go to the end with last bang. It is not bad idea.
I fully recalled my Cycling Technique of Peaceful Wide Current. The cycling method I did before. Its focus was to have long and steady stream of qi cycling through body. With the effect of expanding and strengthening meridians. Preventing any hiccups and sudden outbursts in qi usage witch would meant destroying some long carving.
It was five step cycling technique. Fill meridians full of cultivated qi. Imprint intention of steady flow to it. Widen channels by small increased pressure from dantian and by relaxing the channels. Strengthen channels. Draw in new qi.
Now I had to change it, with the chaotic qi in mind. Any imprinting of intention is out of the question.
I will omit filling. No need. The pressure from so much chaotic qi is enough.
Imprint intention. Instead I will constrict meridian nodes in the right order, one after another, to make the chaotic qi flow in the desire direction.
For widening, I will just relax the channels. No need for extra pressure.
Healing instead of strengthening. I will have to hold on the strand of cultivated qi and used it to heal the most damaged areas. The will temper them after few of cycles.
And no drawing chaotic qi. Instead I would try to sieve through the chaotic qi to look for newly cultivated seeds. But it would took few cycles for fist of converted qi to appear.
To have meridian healings potions, that would made this much more easily.
Decision and plan done, the blob unwrap itself and stand still above my mind. I get the feeling it started cultivated itself somehow. It start rotating. Strange. But I had no time to consider its actions.
I yelled out from the pain as the pressure from chaotic qi impact all at once. Imagine hot, cold, acid coated and blunt nails, hundreds of them, piercing your skin, muscles and even bones. From elbows down where I had the most detailed qi web as I had been possible created.
My spirit start to rotate in the same directions as I intent to press the qi. It had moved the same way when I cultivated regularly as the secondary effect. I hoped now, that its learned movement will help my cultivation.
I started to contract the nodes one after another. To create the desired qi current. The pathways stretched as the chaotic qi was pushed under the pressure. The nodes too. The chaotic qi there had more place run wild and it did. But even with the damages I continue. Once I started I cannot get back without large backlash. The same as with wood carving. Once you decide on design, you cannot change it in the middle without ruining the whole thing or to end with mediocre piece.
So I pressed nodes. One after another. I breath in and out. I didn't have more concentration for more complicated breathing technique so I continued with the breathing wave. With each breath in I contracted the nodes. With breath out I release the pressure and switch to the next nodes. Breath in, press. Breath out, release. Repeat. Again. Cycle.
With that I completed the whole cycle. So many raptures and leaks. I get hold on the strand of cultivated qi and heal all major issues. It used cca 2 wa of my cultivated qi. I had only 13 left. Enough for six more cycles. Hopefully, some of the chaotic qi will be cultivated by that point. I need to achieve some small equilibrium as fast as possible. To be able heal more than the most damaged issues.
As everything was in motion, I was no longer afraid of instability in my dantian. The danger would be if I stopped. The pressures and weakened meridians wouldn't endure.
So I cycled again. I never opened my eyes to prevent distractions but from the feeling on my skin, I could say, the sun was up. So one cycle took whole night.
I continued. Breath in, breath out. There was no room for doubts. For inspection of state of my body. Or spirit. Or even mind. The qi flow was everything in that moment for me.
Contract, release, heal, move on. Cycle. Heal. Skip drawing new qi. Breath in, breath out. Repeat.
I hope that longer chapter is okey,
And up to next quest: Last but one vote about Mantan history. The last one is far away in future as Mantan is not ready to face the events leading to his self exile. But as he run from Toukov, his birth town, he went as far as possible. Ho sold everything he had. Now he had just the dirty clothes.
To which city he run?
Maibor
Maibor is domain of lady Maibor, the Immortal princess.
She is 720 years old, with whole qi body and mind. She is faux immortal, as she had not yet ascended.
Introduces mandatory schools for children to learn basic cultivation, craft and wushu.
She is looking for the last step to achieve the legendary ascension.
Has companion in form of Enlightenment Sprit, fragment of Noble Human Spirit.
Maibor is rather peaceful as nobody is anywhere near to contest the Lady Maibor power.
Taxes are in form of rare materials, which are hoarded in case they will be needed for lady ascension. But nothing excessive as she is ruled with philosophy: More powerful citizen, more rarer resources.
[] Vaostr - mining and trading city
[] Nobr - Farming, foraging and lumber city
Kopol
Kopol is a sect state. Every citizen is part of the sect and in service of the sect. Each child is evaluated in sixth year for potential. Majority of citizen as assigned live long labor. Only few children are focused fully on cultivation.
To traverse in the sect hierarchy is very rare.
Every region is led by Region Sect Elder, which together create the Sect Council. All resources are channeled to them in their dream to achieve the immortality. Annual sect tournament of core disciples to decide the size of regions.
Traveling cultivators are welcomed to trade. But no outsider is allowed to have job in the sect as the prospective rewards could be taken away from the sect.
[] Savavar - military branch of the sect under Elder Cinkas
Chenmu, city state in the forest spirit Lepar
Chenmu is the only city build in the Lepar forest. Lepar is old spirit and it allows Chenmu to be only because when the spirit needs some outside resource, people of Chenmu are at his service.
As every three is part of the Forest Spirit, it allows to chop down only old trees. But the old trees has the most precocious wood in this part of world.
With so much forest, there is no shortage of animals, bot for hunting and for taming.
And herbs grows in abundance in the qi rich forest.
But the forest is not kind place, only citizen of Chenmu has small protection from Forest Spirit Lepar.
