Princess Diaries (MLP/Dresden Files AU)

> flomped

yes

> Basically, don't do a necromancy.

aww. can i do a little necromancy? as a treat?

> end of the world as we know it

convenient prophecising.txt. i don't like this one anyway. (this au tbd tbh)

> I woke up to my alarm clock about thirty minutes later.

too real
 
Job One 1.4
Job One 1.4




Fluttershy is the best veterinarian in town. She's got a knack for animals, and manages a fairly large clinic located at the city limits. The clinic itself had a central building that resembled a small hospital, large glass windows, waiting room, smell of chemical disinfectant soap and all. The main building was flanked by green grass and a number of satellite buildings used to house larger animals and specialty cases. Some of them were specialized too. I had seen a large aquarium setup in one of them, and another resembled a large terrarium. There was a modest cottage perched atop a small hill farther away in the distance, maybe half a mile or so, that I presumed was her house.

There was a crowd of ponies at the clinic's entrance, right beside the large sign near the entrance that stated, simply, "Every animal deserves love and compassion." As I came closer I heard various sounds of panic, distress, and anger all coming up from the rabble. A sleek yellow form hovered a few feet above them, wings gently beating, head pivoting anxiously back and forth from face to face, mouth moving up and down faintly— though I couldn't tell if she was actually saying anything. Her normally gorgeous pink mane was heavily disheveled, as if she hadn't taken care of it in a few days.

I wondered what was going on. I hoped Blue was alright.

"Alright, alright folks! Simmer down now y'all!"

The crowd did just that, quieting down into a din of hushed whispers and grumbling. A light orange mare— earth pony, I noted— pushed her way through the crowd. She had a straw colored mane, most of it tucked underneath a brown cowpony hat, and she had a trio of apples for her cutie mark. She walked like she meant business, and moved through the crowd without bothering to wait for anypony to get out of her way. The mare made a one-eighty and leveled a stern glare at the crowd.

"Ain't none of this rabble rousin' is going to do a darn thing to fix the situation, now is it?" she asked. "How 'bout we all shuddup and let the gal speak?"

The yellow pegasus closed her eyes for a moment.

"Thank you, Applejack," Fluttershy said, nodding to the cowpony, looking like she was about one-quarter visibly relieved, and three quarters mind-numbing anxiety. She turned to the crowd, opening and closing her mouth a couple times.

"Um. I'm sorry that you're all so upset," she said, her voice as soft and quiet as a mouse. "Dr. Fauna and I are still investigating what's going on, but it seems a lot of the larger animals are experiencing some pretty bad digestion issues. Hopefully, we'll have everything sorted out within the next day or two, so if you can come back then that would be better. We're doing our best, but I'm sorry that you all have to wait a little longer, but if you want to go visit your pets, then you certainly can."

Fluttershy floated down to the ground. She seemed to deflate, almost literally, her neck and head slinking down as she appeared to halve her size. She looked down at her hooves as she gently tapped the grassy lawn with them.

"Thank you for understanding," Fluttershy finished, lamely.

I don't think anypony had the heart to argue with that. The crowd dispersed, most of them scattering in a bunch of different directions, while a few stayed behind to go see their animals in the larger holding pens behind the clinic. I approached Fluttershy and the cowpony— Applejack, apparently — to talk to them. The cowpony gave me a bit of a look, and raised a hoof as if to head me off. I quickly averted my gaze so that I didn't keep eye contact for more than an instant.

"Now, listen here missy, I think..." Applejack said. She looked like she was about to start in on me, but then she trailed off and got this puzzled look on her face. "Huh. I don' think I've seen you 'round these parts before."

Applejack pronounced her I's in a very country drawl, more like an "uh", really. I wondered absentmindedly which region of Equestria her dialect was from. Somewhere south of here, for sure.

While Applejack was getting ready to treat me like another member of the angry mob, Fluttershy looked over at me and her tired and sleepless eyes brightened slightly.

"Oh, I remember you," Fluttershy said, her voice more of a breath than not. "Twilight, right? You were here the other day to drop off that large blue rhinoceros beetle. You're new in town, here to be the new librarian?"

"Ayup," I nodded, "That's me. Twilight Sparkle, here to see my pet beetle."

Blue Beetle— who I affectionately called The Blue Beetle, because it sounded pretty awesome— was named after a comic book character that I really liked. She had the heroic responsibility of being my trusty ride as we went to and fro, battling annoying minor errand after annoying minor errand, all in the name of eschewing meaningful amounts of exercise and anything resembling cardiovascular fitness. It was only natural that I thought the heroic naming scheme was fitting.

"Pardon my manners there, Twilight," Applejack said, now looking a little abashed. "Names Applejack, nice to meet ya." She stretched forth a hoof, and I put forward one of my own to give hers a light tap in greeting.

"I probably already introduced myself when you came by a few days ago, but just in case, I'm Fluttershy," Fluttershy said, stretching forth a foreleg. One more hooftap later and the round of introductions was complete. "I was just taking Applejack over to the same building, actually. Feel free to join us on the way there, although you don't really have to."

Okay, that was… surprisingly thoughtful in how it was worded.

"That sounds good to me," I said, falling in step with the other two as they turned to head towards one of the buildings in the back of the property. "So, it sounds like you've been having some sort of situation here?"

"Oh, yes," Fluttershy grimaced. "Dozens of animals with serious indigestion all at once. Either a bug has been going around— oh, dear, pun not intended, I'm sorry."

Wow, that's an almost pathological amount of consideration.

I waved her off. "Don't worry about it. Anyway, you were saying?"

"Right," she said. "Either somethings been going around the clinic and it's only been bothering the larger animals, or something is wrong with the animal feed. I can't think of anything else it could be. That's why I asked Applejack to come over today, actually, her family's ranch provides some of the produce that we use."

"And I said already, that I reckon it ain't something like that," Applejack said, bluntly. "We sell ya the bruised and battered ones for feed, which means you get a pile of random assorted fruits and veggies. "If it was something dangerous in all the produce, then we'd be seeing a whole lot more than just a few big animals puking up their lunches. Sweet Apple Acres sells to the whole town."

Huh, that's where I get my feed from too, I thought. That could be a problem.

"That does sound pretty strange," I commented, as we arrived at a building with a sign that said "Large Insect Pen #3".

"Here we are."

The building was mostly empty, except for a reddish-brown pegasus at the other end that was walking from pen to pen with concerned interest. Blue was in the second pen from the right, and she looked absolutely exhausted. The poor girl was slumped down on the ground, mandibles and horn resting against a bed of hay. I walked over to the pen's fencing, and she perked up. I reached a leg through an opening in the fence, and she slowly scuttled over.

"Hey there girl," I said softly, tapping her chitinous exoskeleton lovingly. "Who deserves some headpats?"

Blue was a massive insect, her thorax was large enough to seat two ponies riding butt to butt, and her abdomen had enough space for a few more riders or a particularly large pile of luggage— that was exactly how I moved most of my stuff over here. She ate about two bushels of apples a day, along with an assortment of various other vegetable refuse and some light afternoon grazing.

(It was somewhat concerning to me that on average, and going purely by the financial data, I ate the least out of my entire household by about an order of magnitude, especially given that one of the members of our household was about a fifth of my size. Perhaps that's not a fair way to measure it, but I'm the one paying the bills there. Oh well.)

I could tell that something was wrong. My mane stood on end, and I suddenly felt a greasy feeling in the pits of my stomach, as if I had swallowed a bucket full of butter.

Magic.

Duh!
I almost kicked myself for not connecting the dots sooner: this was probably related to the thing from Celestia's letter! What were the chances that they just happened to be two entirely separate events that were completely independent? No, no, this was not a coincidence.

I looked down at Blue, and started opening up my Sight to try to investigate.

Remember how I was talking about how magic was similar to a force of the universe, like gravity? That's true. It's also all around us, in various subtle ways. The Sight was a term for the sense that wizards have the ability to use (once you're trained in how to properly open yourself up to See, that is) and it allows the wizard to sense the undercurrents of the arcane that flow all around them, and most importantly, actually process that information as various types of sensory input. The most useful of these was obviously vision— hence the name— but sound, taste, smell, touch, all of those senses were completely hammered with feedback when you used the Sight. It was an incredibly useful tool, and I would probably be using mine literally all the time to satisfy my titanic curiosity in all sorts of ways, if it weren't for one massive, glaring, critical flaw:

The things you experienced with the Sight were burned into your memory. Forever.

So if you Saw the wrong thing, if you heard the wrong sound, smelled a smell that was never meant to be experienced, touched a horror beyond imagining, or tasted a thingy most foul…

It could be goodbye, sanity. Each time you used it, it could be a one way trip to the loony bin, if you weren't careful. Even in the average case, you wanted to be careful with the Sight, because stacking together a massive pile of intensely-unforgettable memories just wasn't something that mortal minds were meant to cope with.

But I knew Blue, and I had no reason to believe there was anything around me that was particularly dangerous, so hopefully it would merely grant me some info that I could put to good use.

I opened up my Sight, and the world entered technicolor. I tried very hard not to look back at Applejack or Fluttershy — though my curiosity at what they would look like with my Sight up was eating me alive. I just looked at Blue. Blue was still a massive rhinoceros beetle, which was something I expected. I saw the sapphire color of her insect body starkly and how it starkly contrasted with... it was almost like the entirety of her body was covered with this cloud of weird yellow-green smoke. As I looked, the smell of rotten eggs suffused my nostrils, and I tasted gunk and bile on my tongue. Eugh.

That's definitely new. Maybe some sort of… magical sickness? A vomiting curse? Who would do something like that? That didn't really fit into the category of "black magic" though, now that I thought about it, so that was sort of weird. Well, at least I had some tangible info on why all these animals were sick.

I twitched as a loud bang — the sound of a bucket clanking loudly into a bunch of others, I think— rang out from behind me. I swiveled instinctively, accidentally Seeing a whole lot more than I expected.

Applejack was like looking at the ponyfication of a stone pillar. A strong wooden support beam that simply existed, as plain as the day is long. There was a quiet strength echoing from how she stood in the pen, as if she half expected to have to put the world on her back and start walking forward. As if she woke up this morning knowing that what awaited her was a day of ceaseless and thankless work, and knew that she would go to bed tonight only to wake up to the same thing the next morning, and so on, a thousand thousand times. I could See all of that, and I could See little frustrations and fears and regrets, as if she was wearing her heart on her flank.

It was… oddly refreshing. Fluttershy though?

Looking at Fluttershy while using the Sight was like getting blasted with the mystical equivalent of a bottle of anti-anxiety pills mixed with ten cups of Manehattan espresso with a shot of adrenaline and a soothing massage on top. The trio of pink butterflies that made up her cutie mark floated gently off her skin, and orbited her head. It was like… she was simultaneously the mortal incarnation of a mental health breakdown internally, but that externally she was… just…

Smiling.

She was just smiling anyway, just to make you feel better, just for you.

And it almost made my eyes tear up, to See somepony like that.

But unfortunately Applejack and Fluttershy weren't the only ponies I saw, since I also managed to get a glimpse of the other pony in the stable as my head swiveled.

And that terrified me.

Because that pony? That pony wasn't a pony at all. When I glimpsed that pony under the Sight, I saw a heaving mass of flesh and sinew being drawn tight over a quadrupedal monster, an insidious, fanged, furry, batlike creature that was only pretending to be a pony. I looked at that… that thing, and I could feel sticky liquid running down my face, a coppery taste in my mouth, and a sick sense of wrongness in my gut.

I shut my Sight off immediately and closed my eyes.

Deep quiet breaths, Twilight, deep quiet breaths. Don't let it know that you know.

"Are you alright, Twilight?" Fluttershy asked. "You look like you're in a lot of pain."

A rasping breath escaped through my teeth.

"Yeah," I lied, as my adrenaline shot through the roof, and then some. "I'm totally fine. It's just painful seeing her this way."

I was not, in fact, totally fine.

I was, in fact, twenty feet away from a vampony of the Red Court.

And it was walking this way.

Fudge.






AN:

Pros: Early chapter, decent wordcount.
Cons: Enjoy yet another cliffhanger!
:p
 
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Blue Beetle— who I affectionately called The Blue Beetle, because it sounded pretty awesome— was named after a comic book character that I really liked

The alter ego of Teddy Bear Kord, no doubt.

Deep quiet breathes, Twilight, deep quiet breathes

Should be 'breaths'.

Enjoyed the chapter. I genuinely have no clue who in Ponyville might be Red Court.

I am, however, 100% certain that Rarity is White Court.
 
Job One 1.5
Job One 1.5



Fear is a pretty powerful emotion.

There's a reason ponies have fear. Fear is a great big burst of energy that you're generally meant to do something with, whether that's "fight" or "flight". Those are the two most common responses at least, and that's the case for a very good reason: for a long, long time throughout history it was the ponies who did one or the other in the face of imminent danger that survived to pass down their traits and habits (whether that's to their offspring or their students).

When faced with something terrifying, usually they either fought it, or they ran away.

I sure felt like running at the moment. While screaming, loudly, and flailing in panic. But there was a third common response to fear that some ponies tended to display in the moment, and that was the one that my brain's primal instincts had unfortunately decided we'd be doing right then and there.

I froze up.

The vampony (vampegasus? vamp?) slowly made her way towards us. Her coat was reddish-brown, and her wings were colored to match. She wore a pair of wire-rimmed glasses, the lenses were cut to be almost razor thin— probably just an accessory, since I very much doubted that vamponies needed to see the eye doctor. She had a … calendar on her flank? Not the sort of cutie mark I expected to see, but I wasn't even sure that the flesh she was puppeteering was necessarily hers, per se.

"Why, hello there," the monster said. "Just the ponies I wanted to talk with this evening."

Applejack let out a weary sigh, whereas Fluttershy just looked slightly confused.

"Um, not to be rude, miss," Fluttershy said, "but who are you?"

The vamp looked momentarily astonished, before collecting herself. "Oh, where are my manners? My name is Nectarine Calendar, I work as an executive manager for Wokefoal Food Corporation?"

"Oh." Fluttershy said. She might have looked slightly less confused than she did a moment prior, but not by much. I was still on guard, since I knew that this was a giant batlike monster wearing a pony for a skin that was talking to us. I'm not a very good liar, so the best I managed was a blank stare. I hoped the vampony chalked it up to some amount of confusion mixed with emotional pain coming from seeing my pet in such a sorry state.

Applejack just looked tired, and annoyed.

"The corporation I work for owns Ruby Red Ranch," Nectarine said, her tone matter of fact and her expression neutral. "We provide some of your produce here?"

Fluttershy's eyes widened in recognition. "Oh, yes! Thank you for coming by, I was hoping that I could discuss something — "

Nectarine cleared her throat with a cough, and Fluttershy stopped talking.

"My time is a bit limited at the moment," Nectarine said, "I want to offer sincerest apologies for the current situation here at your clinic, of course, but I can assure you that our food distribution chain goes through various quality checks — Federal, State, Local, and our own— and that it's incredibly unlikely there were any issues with our product. We will of course offer to run samples of your stock through some additional chemical testing at zero charge, as well as send you the results back, but I'm quite confident that they won't find anything wrong."

Nectarine's expression changed from an impenetrable wall of corporate monotony to a warm smile.

"Now that the official claptrap is out of the way, I am here for another reason. Namely, I would like to invite both you, Fluttershy, and you Applejack, to a bit of a corporate luncheon this Friday. I'd like to help you get to the bottom of this — perhaps even arrange for some charitable donations, if you're in need of resources? We're always looking for tax write offs— "

Wow.

It's like she's not even trying to hide that she's a soulless bloodsucking monster.

"— and of course your friend here can come too." The soulless bloodsucking monster turned to address me. "I'm sorry, I don't think I got your name…?"

Another jolt of nervous energy ran through my body.

"Ah, haha," I laughed, partly to try to coax my vocal chords into working again. "Twilight Sparkle, nice to meet you."

"Quite."

Okay, this was not happening, I needed to figure out a way to —

"Oh, that sounds delightful," Fluttershy said. She turned to me. "You're new in town, right? This would be an excellent opportunity for you to meet other ponies, isn't that right, Applejack?"

"I guess," Applejack said. Her teeth were gnashed together in the fakest smile I'd ever seen. "I reckon it's not a bad idea."

"Oh, wonderful." Fluttershy must've picked up something from my reaction or Applejack's— note to self: figure out why Applejack really doesn't like this pony— because the happy look in her eyes died ever so slightly. She caught herself too late, though. "Y'know, if you wanted to."

Nectarine Calendar looked at me expectantly.

"I'll have to think about it," I said, in the most noncommittal fashion I possibly could. "Anyway, I have to get going, places to be, ponies to see, busy librarian work, you know how it is!"

I quickly turned around.

"Wait!" Nectarine said, loudly. I turned around. She walked up to me and offered a hoof.

I froze for a second.

Alright, one hooftap and I'm out.

I tapped her hoof, and the instant I made contact I could feel a slight shiver run up and down that leg. The subtle exchange of energy that one felt when you were touching the hand of another practitioner.

Uh uh ummmmmmm...

Nectarine Calendar, vampony of the Red Court, and apparently, sorcerer of nebulous strength and skill, looked me in the eye and gave me a wink.

Dang.

She planned that out.

This was getting pretty bad, I needed to get out of here.

"Nice to meet you," I said, stammering slightly.

"Likewise."

This time I turned around and walked straight out of the building and down towards the road. I think Fluttershy and Applejack tried to say goodbye as I left, but I wasn't really paying attention. In fact, I picked up the pace as casually as I could.

My heart was doing a drum solo. Several, I think.

I trotted briskly out of sight of the clinic with my head on a swivel and a knockback spell ready to be fired at a moment's notice. After I was confident I was out of sight, I broke into a swift gallop. I put all that fear and adrenaline to good use and absolutely tore down the streets of Ponyville. My lungs burned and my legs ached, and by the time I reached my front door I was pretty sure my body was on fire — layer of sticky sweat all over me notwithstanding. I fumbled with my keys for a second, panting desperately, before I finally managed to unlock the door and open it. I darted inside and slammed the heavy wooden door closed again and hurriedly locked it, before collapsing in a heap.

I need to work out more, sheesh.

I lay down there in the entryway for a while. At some point, I became dimly aware of a sleepy Spike poking at me with a claw. The door slamming had probably woken him up.

"Twilight, are you okay? What's wrong? What's going on? What's wrong?" Spike asked.

I tried to respond once, and couldn't get the words out. I tried again, but I was still out of breath.

"Water," I said, after giving up on actually answering any of his questions. The little guy darted off into the kitchen, returning with the whole pitcher of cold water that we kept in the fridge. He held it up to my mouth and I drank deeply from it, swallowing the whole thing in a couple long gulps.

"Thanks," I said. "I'll be fine, just… had to run home for something. Go back to bed."

Spike gave me an uneasy glance, but he turned away and went back into his bedroom.

I relaxed a bit, now that I was inside my home and not about to pass out from physical exertion or have a heart attack or have my neck bitten into by ravenous creatures of the night. Home was safe, generally. There was a reason for that.

Houses that are well-lived in by a family tend to acquire a sort of… mystical inertia, inherent to the building. Over time, mortals getting together in a building and treating it like home — sharing meals, bathing, sleeping, having moments of joy and intimacy, and just generally living their lives— tended to slowly build up a protective barrier around the place. We wizards call that a threshold, and the big thing I cared about at the moment was that it would stop Ms. Vamponyface from being able to just waltz through my door without being invited inside. Well, she could do that in theory, but a supernatural being entering the threshold of a home uninvited usually seriously hampered them. If she came in uninvited, she'd be leaving most of her powers at the doorstep, and I'd be able to blow her into next week.

Hmm. That might be a problem, actually. I'd have to wake up to somepony breaking into my house first. I think I had a solution for that though… Well, one more thing to my to-do list tonight.

I felt bad for leaving Fluttershy and Applejack alone with the vampony. I felt bad for leaving Blue alone while she was sick. I sort of just... felt bad. In general. But I needed some time to recuperate and prepare, because letting a monster get the drop on you was a bad idea. Ditto for letting that same monster set up a social event so that she would have the home field advantage.

I was a wizard, dang it! Wizard, is a word that etymologically means "wise one", and it's the same for equivalents in most languages. I just needed to put my brain to use and I'd be able to come up with something.

I yawned. Evidently my body didn't sign off on that course of action, whatever, vetoed. I didn't have the time to be tired right now.

I trudged into the kitchen and refilled the pitcher from the sink, tossing a few chunks of ice from the freezer in for good measure. I muttered a word and telekinetically lifted my cutlery tray up and out of the drawer, holding it aloft, before opening the pantry and levitating out a box of cookies with it. I felt the drain from doing that, a sign that I really had put myself through an obstacle course today. I opened the box of cookies, swallowed a few for good measure, before taking everything and dragging myself into my office.

Yeah, you're in prime condition to be productive tonight, aren't you, Twilight?

Sometimes my internal monologue (or my subconscious or whatever) just decides that we would take a nice, good piece of snark and shoot ourselves in the hoof with it. What was it that my teachers used to say? Something about sharp wits being a blade that could cut both ways.

I set the stuff down, yawned again, and went back to grab the coffee pot.

All-nighters are my specialty.





AN:

"All-nighters are my specialty."

Well, they used to be, a long, long time ago, in a galaxy where I could do the heavy lifting on things one night and then come back to them days later to actually edit and polish them up :p

Just trying to keep the daily-ish updates flowing -- at the moment, this is as much a mental exercise for my daily wordcount productivity as it is anything else, though I try to make things work storywise within that boundary (I tend to outline a bunch anyway, so that's been helping a lot, or so it feels). Hope everypony is enjoying the story so far!
 
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We will of course offer to run samples of your stock through some additional chemical testing at zero charge, as well as send you the results back, but I'm quite confident that they won't find anything wrong."

Third party quality assurance - just as much a Red Court weakness as sunlight or faith.

Hmm. That might be a problem, actually. I'd have to wake up to somepony breaking into my house first. I think I had a solution for that though… Well, one more thing to my to-do list tonight.

I like these moments when the familiar nerdy Twilight breaks through the heavy layer of Harry Dresden. It's not a complaint - Harry's necessary for the tone, and to deliver the worldbuilding and setup, but it's nice to see.

Impressive that you're keeping to these daily updates, with a decent wordcount and decent quality. Do make sure not to rush, though, obviously. Keep up the good work!
 
I love Nectarine's characterization, hiding herself in plain sight by pretending she's merely a garden variety bloodsucking monster. Like a black mamba pretending to be a rattlesnake or a boa constrictor when it could just as easily fly under the radar. This speaks to something, probably, but I'm not sure yet if its confidence or arrogance.
 
If Twilight were truly wise, she would call the White Council to tell them that she found a member of the Red Court. Backup would probably not be forthcoming, but at least anypony that comes to look into her death/disappearance would have warning and a lead.
 
*calmly awaits the arrival of alternate less spooky batponies* and/or *calmly awaits this vampony turning out to be completely reasonable*
 
Houses that are well-lived in by a family tend to acquire a sort of… mystical inertia, inherent to the building.
Hmm. I wouldn't think this would apply to the library proper, right below her house. It is after all, a public building, where the default assumption is that a member of the public may enter. Poses additional security implications when they don't have to enter your house to hurt you.
I'm seeing fire in this filly's future. : (
"I reckon it's not a bad idea."
Applejack thinks it's an awful idea. Completely, (probably literally?) gut-wrenchingly terrible of an idea. That's not, strictly speaking, merely bad. Maybe she's going along with it to keep Fluttershy something resembling "safe".
Evidently my body didn't sign off on that course of action, whatever, vetoed.
you go girl! show that body who's boss!
 
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Job One 1.6
Job One 1.6



I sipped some more coffee and reclined in my backup desk chair. It was a sturdy old piece of polished wood, a hybrid between a standard chair and a rocking chair, it would lean back slightly to accommodate me (but not too far, that would be too relaxing). It was important to have an optimized seating situation at your workspace, especially if you thought you needed to stay up for a long while past your bedtime. I wasn't sure that I'd need it, but I wasn't in the mood to take any chances. My wakefulness was currently being fueled by the remainder of the adrenaline in my system, an ever increasing amount of caffeine, and the mix of stubborn determination and all-consuming curiosity that I inevitably sunk into when I was Working On Solving A Problem.

I had a couple problems, actually.

First, and most concerning to me at the moment: I needed to install some sort of security system in my house. That one I had some ideas for and was fairly confident I could do it in a few hours. Even if it wouldn't last more than a few days, it would do for now.

Second, and most obvious: I needed to figure out how to deal with the vampony sorceress that was apparently in town, who may or may not be related to the rest of my problems (though, it was sort of unlikely that they were all entirely coincidence). I could always sit tight and wait for the White Council to respond to my SOS, but while appealing (in the sense that not having to deal with flesh-eating monsters was appealing) that seemed like the wrong move.

Third, was the fact that it was probably up to me to figure out what was going on with the magical indigestion sickness thingy that was plaguing some of the animal's at Fluttershy's clinic. Since the sickness was magical in nature, that implied a magical cause. It was entirely possible that it would simply go away on its own, but given that my pet rhinoceros beetle was currently sick, I wasn't going to be taking any chances on that front.

Fourth, there was Celestia's letter. "Black sorcery" heavily implied that there was a mortal warlock in town— so it couldn't be Ms. Nectarine. That means there was another player in the game. At least one.

I thought about all of these and tried to picture what the world would look like after I had already solved these problems. What would I have done?

It would definitely start off with me sitting in my office for the rest of the night, working on some anti-burglary measures and doing some research on what reference guides I had on my shelves. After that, my mental map of how things would go became a bit cloudy, as if I was trying to solve a puzzle that was missing a couple pieces, or I was trying to walk through a dangerous woodland trail that was absolutely enshrouded in fog.

That usually meant that I was missing some information (or just not able to see or remember a crucial bit of information) that I needed to Solve The Problem. Not always, but usually.

I kept at it for another couple minutes, trying to make some progress on the off chance that something would click. My brain tossed another hint at me before giving up on that front.

"Alright," I muttered, "Tomorrow's to-do list: delegate some things at the library before heading over to Sweet Apple Acres and talking to Applejack. Her reaction at the clinic wasn't what I would expect, and learning why that was the case might lead me somewhere else."

After that, I started prioritizing: first, I'd sort through my books here looking for vampony lore in case they had some glaringly obvious weakness I could exploit with some advanced preparation. After two hours of that, I'd put that task aside and set up some alarms throughout the house. The rest was a pile of issues for the Twilight Sparkle of tomorrow morning.

I floated over several White Council approved encyclopedias and field guides on supernatural creatures. I opened my favorite one, A Manual of Monsters Moste Malicious which was a door stopper written in the exact same style as an Ogres and Oubliettes monster manual was— in fact, it presented itself as some sort of faux-official expansion content. I had suspicions that the wizard who had authored it was either directly involved in the company that owned that Tabletop RPG or that they were a massive fan of the game as well.

This earned them some brownie points from me.

I flicked through the pages until I got to an entry marked "Vampony-Red Court". There were other types of vamponies, of course (primarily the White Court and Black Court vamponies, but there were a scattering of other types as well) but I didn't want to waste time looking at their entries. The danger of getting lost in an all-evening encyclopedia binge was just too high for me to ignore.

The entry was a couple pages long. I skipped straight to the section on how best to deal with them in a fight, since it was probably most important to read that one first. Unfortunately, the author managed to lose some major brownie points, since the vast majority of the tactical information it contained was limited to the same advice.

"What kind of advice is this?" I complained. "Who thinks that two full pages worth of 'use Fireball, and only Fireball' is practical!?"

Fireballs were out, as was anything else that did fire anything. Nope, nada, not on my metaphorical spell list.

Some of it was presumably useful, at least if you were more experienced than I was, or you had a more experienced wizard helping you out. I had no idea how I would go about "folding the essence of dawn" into a napkin, nor did I have the expertise needed to execute a number of other suggestions.

The most useful bit of advice was to acquire a sawed-off shotgun and some ammunition, and get good at using it.

That's it.

I groaned and went back to the start of the entry, reading the whole thing this time.

They had something of a distaste for being around during the day, and the book claimed that the light of dawn weakened them somewhat. Their puppet bodies were apparently called a "flesh mask" and they were pretty sturdy. Red Court vamponies apparently had some pretty impressive strength and speed, but they were still within a stone's throw of a mortal. That was a relief, there were some supernatural beings that could juggle train cars and casually tie railroad tracks into knots as if they were spaghetti noodles. It was apparently inadvisable to fight them underneath a blood moon. They didn't seem to be capable of crossing a threshold without giving themselves a serious debuff, but that didn't mean it was impossible.

Alright. I still needed some more information. Was there anything else I could be doing in the meantime? It would be beneficial maybe to get some more eyes and ears somehow, since I was mostly flying blind still — metaphorically, since I couldn't actually fly. Self-powered flight was very difficult and super exhausting if you weren't a pegasus.

I popped an Oreo into my mouth and chewed on it thoughtfully. An idea slowly formed in my head. I eyed the summoning circle in the center of my great big office rug.

"Hmmm."

I floated another Oreo up into the cookie consumption queue and grabbed a binder of notes labeled Twilight's Conjuration Compendium from one of my desk drawers.





AN: Quick one. Hope everypony is enjoying their Fridays!
 
Fireballs were out, as was anything else that did fire anything. Nope, nada, not on my metaphorical spell list.

Well that can't be right. How's this going to be a Dresden Files crossover if Twilight can't burn anything down?

Interesting to note that Twilight is apparently less experienced or practiced than Harry was at the start of Storm Front - he had no issue with the 'sunlight in a napkin' trick, where she doesn't seem to have any clue how to go about it. It's possible her talents just lie elsewhere, though.

Aaand it looks like one of those talents might be in summoning. Time will tell how much of a Bad Idea this is.
 
Interesting to note that Twilight is apparently less experienced or practiced than Harry was at the start of Storm Front - he had no issue with the 'sunlight in a napkin' trick, where she doesn't seem to have any clue how to go about it. It's possible her talents just lie elsewhere, though.

Harry has a massive advantage: he has Bob the Skull to consult to doublecheck him on everything or to suggest things (and help work him through technical aspects). This is actually pretty significant in terms of differences in what the world looks like at the start— Twilight doesn't necessarily have a talking head to consult on magical theory 24/7, but she does have Spike, and what difference that makes hasn't been fully explored yet (and she doesn't really know the full of it yet, either).
 
Should get an update tonight at the very least. Hopefully I will get more done today so that I have a bit of a backlog for when its one of those days where I am just completely potato.

At some point there will probably be a double-update day or two, or a very long chapter or two, just to balance things out, since I wanted this part of the story to be finished up by approximately the end of November, and there is a decent amount of story-that-needs-a-writing in the way of that happening at the moment. :p
 
Job One 1.7
Job One 1.7



I decided I was going to summon up some minor spirits to help me in the eyes and ears department.

I walked around the circle, inspecting it for the third time. If you were going to summon something from the spirit realm and try to compel it to do your bidding, then you wanted your circle to be foolproof, regardless of how innocuous or nonthreatening the being you were calling up was.

A summoning circle didn't have to be a literal circle in the geometric sense. It had to at least resemble a circle superficially, and the more circular and exact the physical shape was, the more efficient it was going to be to infuse the circle with your will and "close it", which was a term for the mystical motion of formally erecting a barrier of focused willpower around the perimeter. You could do this with any closed curve — one that looks simple enough I suppose— but again, super inefficient unless the curve is approximately a circle.

Mine was carefully woven into the dark blue floor rug with some very thick bright green thread. The circle itself was fairly large, enough that I could comfortably stand inside if I ever wanted to (or if I ever needed to for that matter) and the interior of the circle had a green five-pointed star touching the boundary. The whole diagram was one of the symbols of Magic. The five pointed star represented the five classical elements: Earth, Air, Water, Fire, and Spirit, which was sometimes called Aether. The circle enclosing it represented Will, so six elements in total.

If you ask a random pony what the most magical number is, they will often tell you that it's seven, or thirteen, or three, or hand you some random gibberish number. Though all of those numbers are somewhat magical (depending on the context) very rarely will anypony look at you confidently and say "six". A hexagon, a six-sided regular solid shape, is one of the only regular shapes capable of tiling the plane in such a way that you optimize for volume covered with respect to the shape's center — this is why honeycomb is hexagonal and grocery stores stack oranges the way they do. There are six queens of Faerie. My cutie mark is a six-pointed magenta star, another symbol of Magic, surrounded by smaller stars. This is not a coincidence.

Technically speaking, some would call the whole thing a pentacle, and the star inside a pentagram, but I've never been able to find a solid source that could state that with authority one way or another. My teacher just referred to it as a circle, so I did the same. The sweet joy of being technically correct (not just technically correct, esoterically technically correct!) was sacrificed at the altar of clear communication long ago, while the remains were buried somewhere in the graveyard of shared lexicon.

I walked around the summoning circle, placing an object that served to represent one of the elements at each point of the star. For Water, I placed down the half-full pitcher of water that I had been drinking from. For Air, I'd constructed a shoddy wind chime out of various bits of cutlery, some string, and a box of rubber bands. I'd be spending some amount of time later tonight trying to engrave some spells into that "wind chime" as well as do the same with a few others, but at the moment it was more than adequate for what I needed. For Earth, I gently put down one of the chunks of quartz that I kept in reserve at the top of the pantry, just in case Spike was getting particularly ravenous. For Fire, I used the heat sink disc from my thaumaturgical fridge experiment. It wasn't burning hot by any stretch of the imagination, but it was comfortably warm, and that would have to do. For Spirit, I reverently placed my copy of Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Stone, the first book in the Daring Do series, one of my favorites. Daring had tons of Spirit.

Last, but not least, in the center of the five-pointed star, I placed a single cookie, and not a crumb more. I gave the whole setup another once-over, before backing up and standing a few paces away. The being I was attempting to call up wasn't particularly dangerous — so long as I was careful, of course— and probably didn't merit so many degrees of caution, but that was no reason to get sloppy.

I readied my will, and I imagined a barrier forming along the boundaries of the circle, taking that mental image and suffusing it with all of the determination I could muster. My horn started giving off a gentle glow during the process.

I whispered the Name of the being I was trying to summon, gently.

Names are very important. They can grab your attention even though your mind is worlds away. They can be used to emphasize something in a way that couldn't be otherwise. They're very intimate parts of ourselves, from both magical and non-magical perspectives. If somepony (or some thing) gets your Name, the whole thing, from your own lips, then they will have some measure of power over you, magic or no magic. The magic just makes for a better lever.

I said the Name of the being I was trying to summon, as if to grab its attention from across a crowded room.

I felt a twinge of resistance. This entity probably didn't want to be interrupted from whatever it was doing and dumped into my office. It wasn't much resistance, actually, and it would take a token effort to surmount it. I had gently called it up a few times before, back in my studies, but this was the first time I was doing this sort of summoning with the intention of making a bargain with a creature. I figured some melodrama was required — I have to at least pay lip service to the whole wizardly mystique thing — so I stomped my right hoof down and brought the entirety of my stubborn personality to bear.

I shouted the Name of the being I was trying to summon, as if the syllables themselves would rip open a hole in reality. I felt the small ounce of resistance shatter, and then the entity appeared.

It was a blue ball of fuzz maybe two inches in diameter, and that was being generous. It had large, almost insectoid eyes, four tiny feet, and a pair of large dragonfly-esque wings that were beating at a furious pace. The entity, a small denizen of Fairie known as a parasprite, seemed confused for a moment. It attempted to leave the circle once or twice, bouncing into the barrier of solid will (which to the little fairy was about as impenetrable as a two-foot wall of concrete) before it realized that it was trapped. It looked up at me with a furious expression— the sort somepony gets when they're really about to give you a piece of their mind, but in miniature — but its eyes darted over to the Oreo in the center and lit up.

The little fairy's body seemed to stretch as an almost comically large maw (for its size, anyway) opened up and swallowed the cookie whole, creamy filling and all.

"Hello, Nom," I said, as neutrally as I could. "I'd like to make a deal with you."

The parasprite looked up at me again, a little puzzled, as if noticing the cookie had completely derailed its mental task list. Which it probably did, since fairies of this size tended to have some pretty short attention spans.

"Hello!" Nom the parasprite exclaimed. "I remember you! You're the pony that gave me the chocolate chip cookies!"

Parasprites loved eating mortal food. It was like their equivalent of drugs, only much more addicting, as far as I could tell — and I ran the experiments of course. Most entities loved eating in general, that's a universal fact. Whether they're a mortal, a fairy, a Dragon, a vampire or some sort of weird unstoppable demon monster, everypony has to eat something. The real monsters just tended to have an appetite for the blood of the innocent or the souls of crying little fillies.

"Yes," I responded solemnly. "I was the one who gave you the chocolate chip cookies. Did you like the cookie you just ate?"

Nom made a sort of… satisfied ringing noise, a series of musical notes that sounded like a cluster of teeny-tiny bells being rung.

"Yes! More! More!"

Excellent. I figured I could bribe the little guy with sugary baked goods to give me some tactical backup. I had to be a little careful about that — dealing with fairies of any sort can be tricky, and it was very, very super-dee-duper ultra-mega important(!) that I did not feed the parasprite too much while it was still in the mortal world. With enough fuel, they multiply like bacteria, and I wasn't necessarily sure that any bindings I put on this one would extend to any of its metaphysical children.

"I shall give you more cookies," I entoned, as ominously as I could manage. "If in return you serve me dutifully for the next three sunsets, doing any task I ask of you, and only those tasks, without partaking in any mortal food that I do not explicitly direct you towards."

Nom paused, considering this. "How many cookies are we talking here?"

"If you accept this bargain, then you shall have…" I levitated the half-finished box of Oreos up. "... the rest of the box! After three days are up, of course."

"Hmmm." Nom said, "Any task?"

"Okay, okay," I said, "I'll give you the rest of this box and another full box when you're done. Final offer."

"Deal!" The parasprite shuddered and buzzed around the confines of the circle.

(In anticipation, I think. Or joy. Or maybe it was just trying to work off the first cookie to make room for more. I'm not the biggest expert on pony body language, so the best I had to work from with respect to the tiny floating cotton ball was a handful of past interactions and some context.)

I nodded. "Excellent, the pact is sealed. Now, get out of that circle and fly around my house for the rest of the evening— out of sight of anypony, please — and let me know if it looks like anyone is trying to get inside."

I relaxed the mental vice grip of will that was invested in the circle boundary, and the little creature shot off into the distance with a soft whirring noise and a small puff of sparkles.

"Okay," I muttered, "Now to work on the burglar alarm."

I collected the items from the pentagram and set them aside, barring the cutlery, which I put back on my desk next to two other makeshift wind chimes. I muttered a word and floated my set of jeweler's tools and a magnifying glass out from the drawer they were kept in. With a few hours of work I'd be able to link the makeshift chimes together, and weave in some sort of alarm spell that would go off if anyone but Spike and I entered the house. This sort of enchanting work wouldn't last, they'd probably wear off in a few days to a week, but they would be good enough for now.

I really needed to set up some proper wards now that I was finished moving in.

"Note to future Twilight," I muttered, adjusting an engraving tool slightly against the blade of a butter knife. "Install wards to home as part of the moving-in process, and not after the fact when you've run into a scenario that actually needs them to be there."

I worked uninterrupted throughout the night, finishing by about sunrise.




AN:

Okay, backlog (somewhat) generated. Hopefully getting at least one out a day at least for the month (we'll see where we're at at the end of Job One).
 
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I would have thought she would have summoned something to either help with the case or help with the vampire but whatever.
 
I would have thought she would have summoned something to either help with the case or help with the vampire but whatever.
Twi sent the parasprite out to be on lookout duty while she's tossing together a quick magical burglar alarm, but given the length of the deal you can bet that she'll have other uses for the little fluffball.
 
I feel like the mention of six Fae Princesses is going to be significant. Perhaps in relation to the Elements of Harmony?
 
Job One 1.8
Job One 1.8



I was out the door as soon as Twilight Sparkle's Makeshift Wind Chime Alarm System (Mark One) was up and active, sparing just a few minutes to leave Spike a note with instructions to shoot fire at anyone else that he sees in the house after hearing those wind chimes going off.

I was halfway down the stairs before remembering that I left the parasprite with the same set of instructions. Sometimes I wanted to kick myself. I blame the sleep deprivation.

"Nom," I said, quietly but with some authority. "Follow close to me and keep an eye out for anything threatening looking — that isn't a pony or an inanimate object. Out of sight, and quiet please."

I heard a soft musical chime in response. I looked around, but I couldn't see the little fuzzball anywhere.

"Nom, chime three times if you can still hear me."

Three chimes answered me. Alright then, we were good to go.

Almost.

I trot down the spiral stairs and along the small path towards the Golden Oak Library at a brisk pace. The library didn't open until a few hours from now, but I wanted to get inside and set up a quick to-do list for the junior librarians. I completed enough paperwork, filing, and reorganizing on the first week of the job that I still had a massive backlog of finished work to delegate to them. I could maybe get away with being absent for a couple days with a flimsy excuse but after that somepony would probably start asking questions.

(Maybe I'd say that I caught a cold from one of the teenagers that was out sick last Friday. Lilyturf, I think her name was? I'd have to doublecheck.)

On the bright side, I'd definitely have more filing to look forward to when I eventually get back.

I entered and reached the head librarian's office without too much trouble. I managed to quickly scribble together notes for all my employees with the aid of a quick telekinesis spell, several pens, a few separate sheets of paper, and a wizardly ability to have at least two separate trains of thought going on simultaneously (it was just something you picked up after a while, really).

I was in and out in less than ten minutes.

I started the journey towards Sweet Apple Acres.

Applejack seemed like the best pony to approach about this whole situation. I might have just met her yesterday, but I got the feeling that she was fairly trustworthy. She seemed to know something about the Red Court vampony — likely from dealing with her mortal guise — and information like that might help me piece some things together that badly needed piecing together. Anypony that is able to stand up to a crowd of frustrated people on behalf of their friend is probably a pretty good pony, all things considered. At least that's what I figured.

(Given that that friend was Flutttershy, that logic might be null and void. I've only met Fluttershy twice now, and as far as I could tell I probably would have not been too far behind Applejack if that had gone on a minute longer. It was pretty hard to not like her. She was just one of those ponies.)

The main issue with this brilliant plan was that my bug was currently still sick with some weird eldritch illness, so I had to get all the way to Sweet Apple Acres on hoof. This was a problem, because the farm was a couple miles outside of Ponyville proper, the maximum distance I generally walked each day was about a mile and change (to the post office and back), and my legs were still incredibly sore from galloping back home yesterday evening.

Oh, I also didn't get any sleep.

Twilight, you are a complete genius.

After an hour of trudging along, a ringing noise filled my ears.

"Look!"

Nom shot into view about an inch in front of my nose, gesturing wildly behind me. I turned and looked.

Coming up the dirt road from town was a larger carriage being pulled by four large earth ponies, there looked to be an even split between mares and stallions. The wooden carriage was painted a darker shade of lavender, so dark that I mistook it for black at first glance. It was otherwise unmarked.

And it was moving. It would be on top of me in seconds. I quickly shuffled to the side of the road, since I wasn't sure that it would be able to stop in time even if the earth ponies pulling the thing noticed me. Better to be safe than sorry, given that carriage accidents kill an alarmingly large number of ponies each year.

Something was off though, like there was something on the tip of my tongue and I just couldn't put my hoof on it…

There was a noise— somepony yelled something, I think, though I couldn't tell what was said exactly— and the earth ponies started slowing down. The carriage passed me, slowing to a halt a ways ahead. One of the windows opened, and a hoof was waved at me. As if to…

...invite me in?

I cautiously approached the dark purple vehicle. As I came closer, I noticed that the smell around it was slightly off. There was the faint odor of dirty fur in the air. I pulled up to the big carriage's side. A unicorn popped her head out of the open window.

She was beautiful.

I don't mean she was pretty, or attractive, or that she had floof in all the right places. No, this mare was beautiful, like she had a team of professionals spend hours doing her mane (which was also a dark shade of lavender) and her makeup every morning.

"Hello there," the mare said. She had a white coat, a very blank eggshell white, white in the "Oreo filling" sense. It had an almost visible sheen to it. Her eyes were the exact color of one of those rare blue diamonds that you only see in a museum or in a royal treasury. "Are you heading to Sweet Apple Acres, by any chance?"

"Uh, yeah," I said. I am the best with words.

"Delightful," the mare said. It was almost a pur. "We're heading that way as well. Would you like to hop aboard? There's a lot of room inside, and you look absolutely tuckered out."

"Sure," I said. Was this some sort of Manehattan actress or somepony like that? Why was she riding over to a farm?

The unicorn smiled. Her teeth were perfect too. "Excellent. Tom-tom, Hendricks, if you would be so kind."

The carriage doors opened and two massive dogs walked out to flank the carriage steps.

Diamond dogs. They were one of the less common non-pony sapients that inhabited Equestria. They were large, bipedal, dog-like creatures that generally ran around in small packs. They could dig holes faster than any other creature on the planet that I was aware of, and they possessed enough innate physical strength that any one of them could probably pick me up and tie me into a sourdough pretzel if they managed to reach me.

If.

I heard a few soft musical chimes in my ears again.

Ah, this definitely fits the "non-pony threatening creature" clause.

I shushed Nom. The two dogs glowered down at me. They looked very intimidating, and it probably would have worked if I wasn't confident I could pick them both up and send them careening off into the nearby woods with a quick spell.

You have to step your game up a bit when intimidating wizards.

I gave them each a blank stare back— politely, of course— and walked up into the carriage.

The interior of the carriage was a simple affair. It was empty except for three large rows of cushioned seats and what looked like an ice box filled with several bottles of (presumably) alcoholic substances. The pony who presumably owned the carriage was sitting at the back, and gestured for me to sit on a cushioned seat on the other end of her own row. I noticed that she was wearing a dress that looked absolutely stunning. It was plain black, with some slits that allowed ample room for her to move while showing off a bit of leg. It looked exceptionally well tailored. Custom design maybe?

I noted with a slight pang of jealousy that I couldn't pull off a dress like that, not a snowball's chance in Sunshine.

Grumble, grumble.

"Why hello there, please take a seat over there, if you please," the pony said. "I'm glad that these gentlemen and I are able to get you out of the summer sun. Rarity is the name. And you?"

I sat down on the cushioned seat. My legs thanked me. The two diamond dogs came back inside and sat down opposite us. I offered my hoof to

"Twilight. Twilight Sparkle. Nice to meet you, Ms. Rarity."

"Likewise." Rarity looked at me from the side as the carriage started moving once again, light from the windows dancing across her eyes, causing them to gleam. Like polished gems. "So, Ms. Twilight Sparkle, tell me: what's interesting about you?"

Huh?

I had to say, I wasn't prepared for that question.
 
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