01 The Strongest Under the Heavens (Ranma 1/2 & Dragon Ball AU Fusion)
- Location
- Argentina
Chapter 01: Harder
I have won fights against old martial masters several times my age.
I have destroyed the top of a mountain in a fight against a warrior with the power of a dragon and even defeated said warrior.
I have killed a being that claimed to be a Phoenix, only to see it reborn as a baby.
Yet I am still not the best martial artist in the world, not even the best in my age group.
How can I be when I was defeated by someone three years younger? Granted it was by a ring out but even so it would be a lie if I don't say my opponent was stronger that me.
I came to the The World Martial Arts Tournament, the Strongest Under the Heavens Championship, the 'Tenka'ichi Budōkai' thinking I had good chances of winning.
After all most old martial arts masters very rarely fight in martial arts tournaments like these; were anyone can see them.
Too much risk of their valued and secret techniques being stolen and their weakness being discovered.
No, the Tenka'ichi Budōkai is for the young, for those of the next generation that want to show to the world that they are the strongest.
My worst worry was an old monster taking part of the tournament despite the risk, maybe due to boredom, maybe to test one of their students.
But no, it was just a kid with spiky hair and a monkey tail, Son Goku, who beat me. Could I have won if I had done things differently? I think so. But that doesn't change that a kid three years my junior gave me a punch that not only got me off the arena but that was so strong that I almost fainted from the pain.
I have won against opponents that are faster and or stronger that me before but... and it hurts to admit this, maybe is good thing that I lost. Ryoga haven't been my match in a while, anyone else is either too weak or an old master that can easily beat me with a fancy trick if they go all out. Pantyhose Taro may be a challenge but that is because his cursed form is a monster not because he is a good martial artist. Would I have got the same fire, the same desire to get better if it was Jackie Chun, who I am quite sure may be the legendary Master Roshi, who beat me?
I wish I could say for sure that I would, but losing against the famous strongest man in the world is not the same that losing to an unknown kid three years younger that me.
Sure I probably would have tried to get better but the fact Goku is younger that me gives me a goal that doesn't seem so far away, that I don't have to train for decades to reach the level of the "Strongest man in the world" but just get faster and stronger to best Son Goku.
Goku fighting style was quite basic, that and his looks made me lower my guard but I won't be my father, I am the one who lost so it is my fault, not anyone else.
Arale can destroy a mountain with just her pinkie finger but she is a robot, Son Goku is human yet he is stronger that me; despite all my years of training, all the pain and suffering and all the troubles I got in my road to be the strongest... I lost.
Worse, I need the money I would have got by winning the tournament; because certain SOMEONE that I can't give a beating due to being a regular human and not a martial artist got greedy and ruined things for everyone.
The result? What should have been a happy wedding ceremony ended in chaos and destruction and the huge debt in my hands; after all it was my wedding wasn't it? Even if I didn't get married and the old monster stole the cure for my curse by drinking it like it was sake.
I can't return as a failure and without the money, Akane's family risks losing their land and home if I do.
So I guess I will have to wander the continent and take part in smaller martial arts tournaments and send money to the Tendos any time I can.
After all while Son Goku is a good kid, I don't think he will win, not if that old monster going by the fake name of Jackie Chun is his master in disguise. So there is no way I can borrow the money from Goku.
And what about his Master? If he is indeed the Great Master Roshi, why would he give me money? He would point out that I am young, healthy and strong and so capable of earning money on my own. The Turtle School helps people to help themselves.
The Anything Goes School teaches people how to be cheating bastards, so it is a good idea to not talk to Jackie Chun in case he knows Happosai. I don't want yet another problem due to something my father or the old monster did, I have enough of those already.
So I definitely will have to hit the road; get the training I can while traveling and win minor martial arts tournaments. A shame I didn't even make into the top eight, but there is always the next tournament, right?
****
"Goku, that kid you fought; what was his name?" Master Roshi asked in a serious tone.
"Ranma." Goku said and ate several donuts.
"No family name?" Roshi asked.
"He didn't mention one."
"Ah well maybe I am mistaken." Master Roshi said and snatched a donut before Goku ate the whole box.
"Mistaken about what?" Bulma asked.
"His style of fighting, it reminds me of someone, an old drinking buddy. Then again that was centuries ago, I don't think he is still alive."
****
"Hey Akane what are ya doing?" Arale asked her friend Akane, she seemed to be a bit down after that big fight a while ago that Arale had not taken part in because she had to take care of her little brother. Then again it was more her little brother taking care of her, he is so smart!
"I miss Ranma." Akane Tendo admitted. While Ranma brought a lot of trouble with him to Penguin Village, he wasn't a bad person. Akane wouldn't have almost married someone who was bad.
"NO! YOU ARE A LYING OLD MAN THAT LIES!" Dr. Mashirito yelled, making Akane look annoyed.
"Check those fancy DNA test of yours, you know it to be true." The old man Happosai said. "What it is, four DNA tests by now? Are you going to try another one?"
"You can't be my ancestor! I refuse to be related to a pervert and a panty thief!"
"My full name is Happosai Hiro Mashirito, I just keep it secret to not give my family problems but since you are evil I don't care!"
"You... you annoying monster!"
"How about Obotchaman?" Akane asked.
"Obot-kun is a nice boy but he is also almost as strong as your friend Arale, he doesn't need any protection." Happosai said and "smoked" a bubble pipe as Arale had got very anti real pipes after she got that class on how to prevent accidental fires, much to the complains of all smokers in Penguin village. But house fires had gone down since then so Arale wasn't gonna stop doing that.
"But what if people say mean things and hurt his feelings you darn pervert?" Dr. Mashirito asked.
"Oh like you do?" Akane said.
"Bah! Who cares if I am related to a panty thief, that loser Senbei is related to a guy who kissed pigs!"
"Yeah, weird fellow he was, nice guy despite that, always was dressed like a Kabuki actor for some reason." Happosai said and made a thinking pose. "Wonder how Ranma is going in the Tenka'ichi Budōkai? They don't air it in TV here."
"Yeah that sucks, we even got satellite TV but is not in one of the channels we get, I wanted to watch strong people fight!" Arale yelled. "Why can't I go to a tournament like that?"
"No robots allowed, you know why." Akane said and glared at Dr. Mashirito.
"Well... you try building killer tobots with no funding! If my robot had won it would have given me money that I need by advertising how great my robots are so I get funding!"
"Caramel Man 001B completely wrecked that fighting tournament; the ship it was happening in sank!" Akane yelled. "If it wasn't because Arale had just got a waterboat mode people would have died!"
That had been fun, Arale liked being a boat. Unfortunately boat mode was broken and in needs of repairs for the moment.
"Bah, is their fault for not making the tournament on land or on a more sturdy ship."
"I never should have got kids." Happosai simply said.
"WHAT? SAY THAT TO MY FACE YOU OLD PERVERT THAT STEALS WOMEN UNDERWEAR!"
"No need, I already wrote it in your face." Happosai said with a wide smile while holding a permanent marker.
Arale then got distracted following a weird looking bug.
****
Ranma first stop after leaving the Tenka'ichi Budōkai in shame (but not before eating lunch) was a small farming village just a hundred miles away of the tournament.
Ranma noticed that a lot of people in the village looked like martial artists and they were also walking weird, as if they were wearing heavy armor or something like that.
"Hi, I want burger and a bottle of water." Ranma ordered at a food stand, even in a rural village like this, they still had burgers, probably because it was next to a popular road.
"Here you go, is 2000 Zeni."
"That much?" Ranma said in a pained tone but paid anyway.
"Do you see any cows around here? All we farm is rice."
"By the way why is a lot of people walking weird?" Ramma asked, the question being the real reason he had bought the food to start with, no way a single burger was going to be enough after walking a hundred miles.
"Oh is just the last training fad, wearing weighed clothing, last year it was carrying boulders and before that I wasn't here but I think it was something about fighting dinosaurs? Not that we have those around here."
Ramma remembered part of Genma's training for him had been to fight while being chained with heavy weights but this seemed more reasonable.
Ranma ate his burger and drank some of the water and started to ask around the fighters were to get weighted clothing, preferably one that while heavy didn't impide his movement.
This being Ranma somehow he ended offending people and ending with a mob chasing him, that Ranma was sure to head away from the town, then he changed genders with the rest of the water and a cute redhead told the angry mob that "Rude idiot." had headed "That way." down the road.
With the mob gone, Ranma the redhead went back to town and used the stealth techniques she had learned from her father and the old monster to spy on the town and find out who was selling weighted clothing.
It turned out there was two main rivals in the weighed clothing making business and Ranma careless asking somehow had insulted both of their fans.
There was also an old man who was "retired" and had taught the other two.
Ranma headed to that one with an "adult magazine" as a bribery. She didn't want to think why she already had one on her backpack, probably the old monster way of wishing him good luck or maybe even her mother way of making Ranma more "manly", despite her mother having moved all the way back to Orange City in the continent, taking Genma with her.
Honesty sometimes Ranma wondered if her mother had been some kind of ninja in her youth, what with the way she keep sneaking on her.
To Ramma's surprise the old man didn't like the "bribe" and started a ten minute rant on how he was not a pervert... then as Ranma expected he took the magazine anyway and said he was retired.
Ranma then asked for hot water to show up a "magic trick" to the old man. And once she got it she revealed her curse by turning back into a man.
"I need weighted clothing that fits both my forms and doesn't restrict my moment save for being heavy."
The old man just... stared.
Then he looked at his hands, one of them holding the adult magazine, the other empty.
"I can't be drunk, I ran out of sake days ago."
"I felt in a cursed spring in the Kun Long Mountains Valley, cold water I am a girl; hot water I am a boy."
"Oh that? I once meet a boy who turns into a pig, unfortunately the best I could do was the weighted clothing not killing him when he becomes a small pig. But in your case... mm, technically possible... but it won't be cheap. Capsule Corp has made these new fabrics that can easy stretch and shrink repeatedly without breaking, and with the right chemical composition-"
Ranma tuned out the old man rant; this was gonna take a while.
****
In the end the weighted clothing was expensive but Ranma had the money and didn't have to do some crazy errands, beat people up or win a martial arts tournament. He was almost disappointed but no one wanted to make a martial arts tournament with the Tenka'ichi Budōkai still going on, and for once he actually had money to buy something nice he wanted so he keep silent about it let his luck turn out as usual.
Only that as he was leaving with the weighted clothes on some idiot recognised him from the Tenka'ichi Budōkai and then almost EVERYONE wanted to fight him.
Ranma took it as practice, without the weighed clothing it would have been too easy, with it it was a bit of a challenge but nothing compared to some of the things his father had called "training".
About a hour later Ranma had beaten up half the town, made sure to yell that "Old Master Russ" was the one who made his weighted clothing and then left town as quickly as he could.
Because he definitely wasn't gonna pay for any damages.
****
Akane was blushing, that stupid Doctor Senbei had left that "Ten years later" ray gun out the safe again and Akane had been hit by it, so now she looked like an adult woman... in clothes that barely fit.
At least she could take some small satisfaction that unlike what almost everyone had been saying for years, she would eventually fill out and supass her sister Kasumi. Even if her real age was seventeen and Dr. Mashirito has ranted that's now what was supposed to happen with human women after that age.
So what if she may have some non human ancestor? Dr. Mashirito was just being a jerk!
Then again one of the way women... fill out... is... by having children.
Well she and Ranma were going to marry and have children so that must be it.
Hopefully the jerk would win the Tenka'ichi Budōkai and get the prize money so they could pay the debts, have a quick secret marriage and have a honeymoon away from Penguin Village usual madness.
"Oh Akane you look big!" Arale said, she had been shot with the gun too but being a robot still looked the same.
Akane blushed harder and her head became as red as a tomato.
Only good thing about this was the 'ten years later' gun having turned Dr. Mashirito into a ghost.
Yes Akane shouldn't wish anyone else death but honestly even Obotchaman barely tolerared him and he is basically a saint!
****
It was a lovely day at the Animal Village until a horrible goose started to ruin it.
"HONK!" The giant goose had three heads; sharp teeth and worse, it was stealing everyone hats!
BANG!
Down went the goose after being hit by... an umbrella?
"Is this Central City?" A wandering martial artist with a heavy backpack asked.
"No, this is the Animal Village." A pig man said.
"Lost again uh? Well anyone got some oranges? I want to cook this goose... unless that's like against the local laws or something." Ryoga Hibiki said, feeling a bit hungry.
"Eh that horrible goose has been annoying us for years, so no problem." The pig man said. "Although how are you going to cook something that big? Is bigger that a truck!"
"I was thinking fire... unless you got a better idea?"
"Well I happen to own a restaurant and many locals would pay for-"
"HONK!" The giant horrible goose stood up once to go down again in a single punch for the wild looking eternal lost boy, Ryoga Hibiki.
"Better finish off this thing first." Ryoga said, took out his belt, turned it into a sword by using his ki to harden it, then cut the monster goose head off.
Then his pants felt off.
"Dammit; I knew I had lost weight!"
***
"You... you want us to beat you up with steel bars... for training? Are you nuts?" The pig man asked as he helped Ryoga cook the giant goose in the quite expansive kitchen of his restaurant. It had taken a while to get the young man there, he keep heading the wrong way. Maybe he was mostly blind and too proud to wear glasses?
"Even giant boulders barely hurt me anymore, and I need to be stronger, my rival Saotome laughts at my best punches and kicks! What kind of man I am if I can't even make my kicks and punches hurt!"
"But what if you die... or get crippled?"
"I got the legal paperwork ready in my backpack, even if you kill me you should be in the clear!"
"What... what kind of lunatic are you?"
"The kind who saw their hated rival reach the top sixteen in the Tenka'ichi Budōkai!" Ryoga said raising his hand and then lowered it down to start salting the meat. "Besides if this works I will get bulletproof skin! How cool is that?"
"I admit, that does sound cool. You sure you don't want more help cooking this? Is a lot of meat even after removing the feathers and skinning the dead goose."
"Nah, I cooked for a whole army as a summer job, I am good." The Red Ribbon Army really had not wanted to let him go but he had to get back home to his wife Akari.
After Ranma disaster of a wedding they had got a quick marriage but soon realised trying to keep him in the pig farm just was not gonna work with his horrible sense of direction. So now Ryoga traveled, send his wife money and gifts and made sure to try to be home at least once every few months.
****
Akari Unryu wondered when her husband would get home, then again she had been warned against marrying a Hibiki and yet she did so anyway, so she had no one to blame but herself.
Video and phone calls just weren't the same! And yes her husband always send her gifts and money but she wanted him.
Next time she saw Ryoga she was gonna chain him to bed and don't let him leave for at least a week!
****
Eventually the Tenka'ichi Budōkai ended and just as Ranma expected the winner was Jackie Chun, he was able to catch the final in a Capital City Cafe.
If Jackie Chun was not Master Roshi in disguise Ranma would beat the next tournament he was in as a woman using high heels in a revealing dress.
There was no way that someone who wasn't Master Roshi himself or one of his students knew the KameHameha. Also know as the Turtle Destruction Wave or the Turtle Devastation Wave, the technique was something not actually easy to copy. If it was Ranma was sure the old pervert monster would have used it on him already instead of merely using explosives.
Sure Ranma knew one ki attack technique... that was made by miners to clear up rubble and was originally developed by civil engineers to help escape from a collapsed tunnel.
As a result it wasn't actually a combat technique and while Ryoga could actually use the Shishi Hōkōdan in fights due to his horrible tendency to depression and despair... even Ryoga strongest Shishi Hōkōdan blast was nothing against Master Roshi KameHameha. The man had literally used it to destroy the moon!
Well that or push it from its regular orbit, if the moon actually was destroyed that would have heavily affected sea currents and nothing of the sort happened. No tildal waves, no sea level dramatically rising or lowering. Ranma should know, he was forced to take a test about that stuff at school.
If Kamisama was real (Ghosts and kitsune exist so why not a supreme God?) , he probably would put the Moon back on the right orbit eventually.
If that didn't happen, well the weather and sea levels would be noticeably affected.
Anyway neither the Shishi Hōkōdan or his own variant the Mōko Takabisha, that's based on confidence, would even be able to do something like that.
That meant that Ranma now had to invent a new Ki technique that didn't use emotions, that probably would make it way more draining.
Oh and don't forget start to earn money soon, with the Tenka'ichi Budōkai being over, small tournaments should start to happen again.
Now, what kind of training he could do to raise both his stamina and endurance? He was gonna need that to not just use a pure Ki attack and faint.
Running as regularly as he could with the weighted clothing on was a start, then slowly increase the amount he ran... is something that he has done before if with less practical weights on.
But Ranma had not done as much swimming as he could, swimming gives a more complete body workout that just running so he should do both. Swimming with weights on would be hard but possible.
Now if it was Genma making him do the training he probably would make him do it in monster infested places. Run away from dinosaurs then swim away from sharks maybe?
And as much as Ranma didn't like the idea, it probably would work better for him that way.
He should also alternate between periods of max effort exercise with rest periods or he would end ripping himself apart.
He also should keep with jumping training, since that's the base of Anything Goes besides cheating, aerial combat.
And of course thanks to that punch Goku gave him Ranma wanted to do Strength training, but while heavy clothing was a good start, regular weight lifting was something his father mocked.
"You have to train your whole body son, not just what makes you look good. Lifting a lot of weight looks impressive but that doesn't win fights, a kick or fist that can shatter rock does."
Well, Ranma could alredy shatter rocks, but he couldn't ruin his hands trying to shatter steel, he may heal faster that a normal person but he needed healthy hands to win tournaments and get money.
"Guess I will have to find out if there is some method to do it faster."
Ranma was lucky Goku didn't turn into a giant monkey in his fight... Although there had been something werewolf like about that, like Goku losing control.
So... it probably was by accident because it was something he had no control over.
'This would be easier with a Sensei or a training partner, ah well, maybe I will eventually find something.'
Ranma paid his bill and left the Cafe, he had to both find a tournament and someplace in the wilderness to train.
Only, outside the Cafe, Ranma couldn't believe his eyes.
Ranma just... stared.
Sure he had lived in Penguin Village for two years but this...
This was really stupid.
Even the kitsune (that was basically Arale unofficial pet) was better at tricking people that this!
Two kids, wearing a long trencoat and a fake beard and trying to sneak in an adults movie? Worse, they let them in!
On one hand Ranma professional pride demanded he taught the kids how to actually pull a scam right. On the other a voice in his head, that sounded a lot like an angry Akane, was yelling at him "Don't you dare do something illegal you idiot!"
So Ranma forced himself to walk away from the gullible idiot, he could try to find some dinosaurs to fight or something.
Yeah that sounded good.
Ranma really hoped his father never found about this or he would try to pull scams in Capital City and end arrested.
Once he was miles away from the city Ranma saw it... a lone dinosaur.
'Those are big horns, perfect!'
Ranma slowly approached the multi horned dinosaur only to be disappointed to see it eating grass.
"Well they say I can get quite annoying and I do need the training."
Ranma approached the horned dinosaur to poke at it until it attacked Ramma, only to hear a roar and find a much much much bigger dinosaur had somehow got behind Ranma.
Worse, it started to rain.
Ranma ended 'convincing' the giant house sized dinosaur to chase her instead of the grass eating dinosaur.
All while an inner voice that sounded a lot like Akane called her a suicidal idiot.
AN: Remember how in the next Tenka'ichi Budōkai Goku loses by ring out despite being so strong he can tank a technique so dangerous it should have killed him? Here Ranma loses by ring out despite the fact he should have been able to win the fight otherwise.
That's right you aren't a Dragon Ball protagonist if you don't lose at least one Tenka'ichi Budōkai by ring out! That's why Gohan could never cut it.
I have won fights against old martial masters several times my age.
I have destroyed the top of a mountain in a fight against a warrior with the power of a dragon and even defeated said warrior.
I have killed a being that claimed to be a Phoenix, only to see it reborn as a baby.
Yet I am still not the best martial artist in the world, not even the best in my age group.
How can I be when I was defeated by someone three years younger? Granted it was by a ring out but even so it would be a lie if I don't say my opponent was stronger that me.
I came to the The World Martial Arts Tournament, the Strongest Under the Heavens Championship, the 'Tenka'ichi Budōkai' thinking I had good chances of winning.
After all most old martial arts masters very rarely fight in martial arts tournaments like these; were anyone can see them.
Too much risk of their valued and secret techniques being stolen and their weakness being discovered.
No, the Tenka'ichi Budōkai is for the young, for those of the next generation that want to show to the world that they are the strongest.
My worst worry was an old monster taking part of the tournament despite the risk, maybe due to boredom, maybe to test one of their students.
But no, it was just a kid with spiky hair and a monkey tail, Son Goku, who beat me. Could I have won if I had done things differently? I think so. But that doesn't change that a kid three years my junior gave me a punch that not only got me off the arena but that was so strong that I almost fainted from the pain.
I have won against opponents that are faster and or stronger that me before but... and it hurts to admit this, maybe is good thing that I lost. Ryoga haven't been my match in a while, anyone else is either too weak or an old master that can easily beat me with a fancy trick if they go all out. Pantyhose Taro may be a challenge but that is because his cursed form is a monster not because he is a good martial artist. Would I have got the same fire, the same desire to get better if it was Jackie Chun, who I am quite sure may be the legendary Master Roshi, who beat me?
I wish I could say for sure that I would, but losing against the famous strongest man in the world is not the same that losing to an unknown kid three years younger that me.
Sure I probably would have tried to get better but the fact Goku is younger that me gives me a goal that doesn't seem so far away, that I don't have to train for decades to reach the level of the "Strongest man in the world" but just get faster and stronger to best Son Goku.
Goku fighting style was quite basic, that and his looks made me lower my guard but I won't be my father, I am the one who lost so it is my fault, not anyone else.
Arale can destroy a mountain with just her pinkie finger but she is a robot, Son Goku is human yet he is stronger that me; despite all my years of training, all the pain and suffering and all the troubles I got in my road to be the strongest... I lost.
Worse, I need the money I would have got by winning the tournament; because certain SOMEONE that I can't give a beating due to being a regular human and not a martial artist got greedy and ruined things for everyone.
The result? What should have been a happy wedding ceremony ended in chaos and destruction and the huge debt in my hands; after all it was my wedding wasn't it? Even if I didn't get married and the old monster stole the cure for my curse by drinking it like it was sake.
I can't return as a failure and without the money, Akane's family risks losing their land and home if I do.
So I guess I will have to wander the continent and take part in smaller martial arts tournaments and send money to the Tendos any time I can.
After all while Son Goku is a good kid, I don't think he will win, not if that old monster going by the fake name of Jackie Chun is his master in disguise. So there is no way I can borrow the money from Goku.
And what about his Master? If he is indeed the Great Master Roshi, why would he give me money? He would point out that I am young, healthy and strong and so capable of earning money on my own. The Turtle School helps people to help themselves.
The Anything Goes School teaches people how to be cheating bastards, so it is a good idea to not talk to Jackie Chun in case he knows Happosai. I don't want yet another problem due to something my father or the old monster did, I have enough of those already.
So I definitely will have to hit the road; get the training I can while traveling and win minor martial arts tournaments. A shame I didn't even make into the top eight, but there is always the next tournament, right?
****
"Goku, that kid you fought; what was his name?" Master Roshi asked in a serious tone.
"Ranma." Goku said and ate several donuts.
"No family name?" Roshi asked.
"He didn't mention one."
"Ah well maybe I am mistaken." Master Roshi said and snatched a donut before Goku ate the whole box.
"Mistaken about what?" Bulma asked.
"His style of fighting, it reminds me of someone, an old drinking buddy. Then again that was centuries ago, I don't think he is still alive."
****
"Hey Akane what are ya doing?" Arale asked her friend Akane, she seemed to be a bit down after that big fight a while ago that Arale had not taken part in because she had to take care of her little brother. Then again it was more her little brother taking care of her, he is so smart!
"I miss Ranma." Akane Tendo admitted. While Ranma brought a lot of trouble with him to Penguin Village, he wasn't a bad person. Akane wouldn't have almost married someone who was bad.
"NO! YOU ARE A LYING OLD MAN THAT LIES!" Dr. Mashirito yelled, making Akane look annoyed.
"Check those fancy DNA test of yours, you know it to be true." The old man Happosai said. "What it is, four DNA tests by now? Are you going to try another one?"
"You can't be my ancestor! I refuse to be related to a pervert and a panty thief!"
"My full name is Happosai Hiro Mashirito, I just keep it secret to not give my family problems but since you are evil I don't care!"
"You... you annoying monster!"
"How about Obotchaman?" Akane asked.
"Obot-kun is a nice boy but he is also almost as strong as your friend Arale, he doesn't need any protection." Happosai said and "smoked" a bubble pipe as Arale had got very anti real pipes after she got that class on how to prevent accidental fires, much to the complains of all smokers in Penguin village. But house fires had gone down since then so Arale wasn't gonna stop doing that.
"But what if people say mean things and hurt his feelings you darn pervert?" Dr. Mashirito asked.
"Oh like you do?" Akane said.
"Bah! Who cares if I am related to a panty thief, that loser Senbei is related to a guy who kissed pigs!"
"Yeah, weird fellow he was, nice guy despite that, always was dressed like a Kabuki actor for some reason." Happosai said and made a thinking pose. "Wonder how Ranma is going in the Tenka'ichi Budōkai? They don't air it in TV here."
"Yeah that sucks, we even got satellite TV but is not in one of the channels we get, I wanted to watch strong people fight!" Arale yelled. "Why can't I go to a tournament like that?"
"No robots allowed, you know why." Akane said and glared at Dr. Mashirito.
"Well... you try building killer tobots with no funding! If my robot had won it would have given me money that I need by advertising how great my robots are so I get funding!"
"Caramel Man 001B completely wrecked that fighting tournament; the ship it was happening in sank!" Akane yelled. "If it wasn't because Arale had just got a waterboat mode people would have died!"
That had been fun, Arale liked being a boat. Unfortunately boat mode was broken and in needs of repairs for the moment.
"Bah, is their fault for not making the tournament on land or on a more sturdy ship."
"I never should have got kids." Happosai simply said.
"WHAT? SAY THAT TO MY FACE YOU OLD PERVERT THAT STEALS WOMEN UNDERWEAR!"
"No need, I already wrote it in your face." Happosai said with a wide smile while holding a permanent marker.
Arale then got distracted following a weird looking bug.
****
Ranma first stop after leaving the Tenka'ichi Budōkai in shame (but not before eating lunch) was a small farming village just a hundred miles away of the tournament.
Ranma noticed that a lot of people in the village looked like martial artists and they were also walking weird, as if they were wearing heavy armor or something like that.
"Hi, I want burger and a bottle of water." Ranma ordered at a food stand, even in a rural village like this, they still had burgers, probably because it was next to a popular road.
"Here you go, is 2000 Zeni."
"That much?" Ranma said in a pained tone but paid anyway.
"Do you see any cows around here? All we farm is rice."
"By the way why is a lot of people walking weird?" Ramma asked, the question being the real reason he had bought the food to start with, no way a single burger was going to be enough after walking a hundred miles.
"Oh is just the last training fad, wearing weighed clothing, last year it was carrying boulders and before that I wasn't here but I think it was something about fighting dinosaurs? Not that we have those around here."
Ramma remembered part of Genma's training for him had been to fight while being chained with heavy weights but this seemed more reasonable.
Ranma ate his burger and drank some of the water and started to ask around the fighters were to get weighted clothing, preferably one that while heavy didn't impide his movement.
This being Ranma somehow he ended offending people and ending with a mob chasing him, that Ranma was sure to head away from the town, then he changed genders with the rest of the water and a cute redhead told the angry mob that "Rude idiot." had headed "That way." down the road.
With the mob gone, Ranma the redhead went back to town and used the stealth techniques she had learned from her father and the old monster to spy on the town and find out who was selling weighted clothing.
It turned out there was two main rivals in the weighed clothing making business and Ranma careless asking somehow had insulted both of their fans.
There was also an old man who was "retired" and had taught the other two.
Ranma headed to that one with an "adult magazine" as a bribery. She didn't want to think why she already had one on her backpack, probably the old monster way of wishing him good luck or maybe even her mother way of making Ranma more "manly", despite her mother having moved all the way back to Orange City in the continent, taking Genma with her.
Honesty sometimes Ranma wondered if her mother had been some kind of ninja in her youth, what with the way she keep sneaking on her.
To Ramma's surprise the old man didn't like the "bribe" and started a ten minute rant on how he was not a pervert... then as Ranma expected he took the magazine anyway and said he was retired.
Ranma then asked for hot water to show up a "magic trick" to the old man. And once she got it she revealed her curse by turning back into a man.
"I need weighted clothing that fits both my forms and doesn't restrict my moment save for being heavy."
The old man just... stared.
Then he looked at his hands, one of them holding the adult magazine, the other empty.
"I can't be drunk, I ran out of sake days ago."
"I felt in a cursed spring in the Kun Long Mountains Valley, cold water I am a girl; hot water I am a boy."
"Oh that? I once meet a boy who turns into a pig, unfortunately the best I could do was the weighted clothing not killing him when he becomes a small pig. But in your case... mm, technically possible... but it won't be cheap. Capsule Corp has made these new fabrics that can easy stretch and shrink repeatedly without breaking, and with the right chemical composition-"
Ranma tuned out the old man rant; this was gonna take a while.
****
In the end the weighted clothing was expensive but Ranma had the money and didn't have to do some crazy errands, beat people up or win a martial arts tournament. He was almost disappointed but no one wanted to make a martial arts tournament with the Tenka'ichi Budōkai still going on, and for once he actually had money to buy something nice he wanted so he keep silent about it let his luck turn out as usual.
Only that as he was leaving with the weighted clothes on some idiot recognised him from the Tenka'ichi Budōkai and then almost EVERYONE wanted to fight him.
Ranma took it as practice, without the weighed clothing it would have been too easy, with it it was a bit of a challenge but nothing compared to some of the things his father had called "training".
About a hour later Ranma had beaten up half the town, made sure to yell that "Old Master Russ" was the one who made his weighted clothing and then left town as quickly as he could.
Because he definitely wasn't gonna pay for any damages.
****
Akane was blushing, that stupid Doctor Senbei had left that "Ten years later" ray gun out the safe again and Akane had been hit by it, so now she looked like an adult woman... in clothes that barely fit.
At least she could take some small satisfaction that unlike what almost everyone had been saying for years, she would eventually fill out and supass her sister Kasumi. Even if her real age was seventeen and Dr. Mashirito has ranted that's now what was supposed to happen with human women after that age.
So what if she may have some non human ancestor? Dr. Mashirito was just being a jerk!
Then again one of the way women... fill out... is... by having children.
Well she and Ranma were going to marry and have children so that must be it.
Hopefully the jerk would win the Tenka'ichi Budōkai and get the prize money so they could pay the debts, have a quick secret marriage and have a honeymoon away from Penguin Village usual madness.
"Oh Akane you look big!" Arale said, she had been shot with the gun too but being a robot still looked the same.
Akane blushed harder and her head became as red as a tomato.
Only good thing about this was the 'ten years later' gun having turned Dr. Mashirito into a ghost.
Yes Akane shouldn't wish anyone else death but honestly even Obotchaman barely tolerared him and he is basically a saint!
****
It was a lovely day at the Animal Village until a horrible goose started to ruin it.
"HONK!" The giant goose had three heads; sharp teeth and worse, it was stealing everyone hats!
BANG!
Down went the goose after being hit by... an umbrella?
"Is this Central City?" A wandering martial artist with a heavy backpack asked.
"No, this is the Animal Village." A pig man said.
"Lost again uh? Well anyone got some oranges? I want to cook this goose... unless that's like against the local laws or something." Ryoga Hibiki said, feeling a bit hungry.
"Eh that horrible goose has been annoying us for years, so no problem." The pig man said. "Although how are you going to cook something that big? Is bigger that a truck!"
"I was thinking fire... unless you got a better idea?"
"Well I happen to own a restaurant and many locals would pay for-"
"HONK!" The giant horrible goose stood up once to go down again in a single punch for the wild looking eternal lost boy, Ryoga Hibiki.
"Better finish off this thing first." Ryoga said, took out his belt, turned it into a sword by using his ki to harden it, then cut the monster goose head off.
Then his pants felt off.
"Dammit; I knew I had lost weight!"
***
"You... you want us to beat you up with steel bars... for training? Are you nuts?" The pig man asked as he helped Ryoga cook the giant goose in the quite expansive kitchen of his restaurant. It had taken a while to get the young man there, he keep heading the wrong way. Maybe he was mostly blind and too proud to wear glasses?
"Even giant boulders barely hurt me anymore, and I need to be stronger, my rival Saotome laughts at my best punches and kicks! What kind of man I am if I can't even make my kicks and punches hurt!"
"But what if you die... or get crippled?"
"I got the legal paperwork ready in my backpack, even if you kill me you should be in the clear!"
"What... what kind of lunatic are you?"
"The kind who saw their hated rival reach the top sixteen in the Tenka'ichi Budōkai!" Ryoga said raising his hand and then lowered it down to start salting the meat. "Besides if this works I will get bulletproof skin! How cool is that?"
"I admit, that does sound cool. You sure you don't want more help cooking this? Is a lot of meat even after removing the feathers and skinning the dead goose."
"Nah, I cooked for a whole army as a summer job, I am good." The Red Ribbon Army really had not wanted to let him go but he had to get back home to his wife Akari.
After Ranma disaster of a wedding they had got a quick marriage but soon realised trying to keep him in the pig farm just was not gonna work with his horrible sense of direction. So now Ryoga traveled, send his wife money and gifts and made sure to try to be home at least once every few months.
****
Akari Unryu wondered when her husband would get home, then again she had been warned against marrying a Hibiki and yet she did so anyway, so she had no one to blame but herself.
Video and phone calls just weren't the same! And yes her husband always send her gifts and money but she wanted him.
Next time she saw Ryoga she was gonna chain him to bed and don't let him leave for at least a week!
****
Eventually the Tenka'ichi Budōkai ended and just as Ranma expected the winner was Jackie Chun, he was able to catch the final in a Capital City Cafe.
If Jackie Chun was not Master Roshi in disguise Ranma would beat the next tournament he was in as a woman using high heels in a revealing dress.
There was no way that someone who wasn't Master Roshi himself or one of his students knew the KameHameha. Also know as the Turtle Destruction Wave or the Turtle Devastation Wave, the technique was something not actually easy to copy. If it was Ranma was sure the old pervert monster would have used it on him already instead of merely using explosives.
Sure Ranma knew one ki attack technique... that was made by miners to clear up rubble and was originally developed by civil engineers to help escape from a collapsed tunnel.
As a result it wasn't actually a combat technique and while Ryoga could actually use the Shishi Hōkōdan in fights due to his horrible tendency to depression and despair... even Ryoga strongest Shishi Hōkōdan blast was nothing against Master Roshi KameHameha. The man had literally used it to destroy the moon!
Well that or push it from its regular orbit, if the moon actually was destroyed that would have heavily affected sea currents and nothing of the sort happened. No tildal waves, no sea level dramatically rising or lowering. Ranma should know, he was forced to take a test about that stuff at school.
If Kamisama was real (Ghosts and kitsune exist so why not a supreme God?) , he probably would put the Moon back on the right orbit eventually.
If that didn't happen, well the weather and sea levels would be noticeably affected.
Anyway neither the Shishi Hōkōdan or his own variant the Mōko Takabisha, that's based on confidence, would even be able to do something like that.
That meant that Ranma now had to invent a new Ki technique that didn't use emotions, that probably would make it way more draining.
Oh and don't forget start to earn money soon, with the Tenka'ichi Budōkai being over, small tournaments should start to happen again.
Now, what kind of training he could do to raise both his stamina and endurance? He was gonna need that to not just use a pure Ki attack and faint.
Running as regularly as he could with the weighted clothing on was a start, then slowly increase the amount he ran... is something that he has done before if with less practical weights on.
But Ranma had not done as much swimming as he could, swimming gives a more complete body workout that just running so he should do both. Swimming with weights on would be hard but possible.
Now if it was Genma making him do the training he probably would make him do it in monster infested places. Run away from dinosaurs then swim away from sharks maybe?
And as much as Ranma didn't like the idea, it probably would work better for him that way.
He should also alternate between periods of max effort exercise with rest periods or he would end ripping himself apart.
He also should keep with jumping training, since that's the base of Anything Goes besides cheating, aerial combat.
And of course thanks to that punch Goku gave him Ranma wanted to do Strength training, but while heavy clothing was a good start, regular weight lifting was something his father mocked.
"You have to train your whole body son, not just what makes you look good. Lifting a lot of weight looks impressive but that doesn't win fights, a kick or fist that can shatter rock does."
Well, Ranma could alredy shatter rocks, but he couldn't ruin his hands trying to shatter steel, he may heal faster that a normal person but he needed healthy hands to win tournaments and get money.
"Guess I will have to find out if there is some method to do it faster."
Ranma was lucky Goku didn't turn into a giant monkey in his fight... Although there had been something werewolf like about that, like Goku losing control.
So... it probably was by accident because it was something he had no control over.
'This would be easier with a Sensei or a training partner, ah well, maybe I will eventually find something.'
Ranma paid his bill and left the Cafe, he had to both find a tournament and someplace in the wilderness to train.
Only, outside the Cafe, Ranma couldn't believe his eyes.
Ranma just... stared.
Sure he had lived in Penguin Village for two years but this...
This was really stupid.
Even the kitsune (that was basically Arale unofficial pet) was better at tricking people that this!
Two kids, wearing a long trencoat and a fake beard and trying to sneak in an adults movie? Worse, they let them in!
On one hand Ranma professional pride demanded he taught the kids how to actually pull a scam right. On the other a voice in his head, that sounded a lot like an angry Akane, was yelling at him "Don't you dare do something illegal you idiot!"
So Ranma forced himself to walk away from the gullible idiot, he could try to find some dinosaurs to fight or something.
Yeah that sounded good.
Ranma really hoped his father never found about this or he would try to pull scams in Capital City and end arrested.
Once he was miles away from the city Ranma saw it... a lone dinosaur.
'Those are big horns, perfect!'
Ranma slowly approached the multi horned dinosaur only to be disappointed to see it eating grass.
"Well they say I can get quite annoying and I do need the training."
Ranma approached the horned dinosaur to poke at it until it attacked Ramma, only to hear a roar and find a much much much bigger dinosaur had somehow got behind Ranma.
Worse, it started to rain.
Ranma ended 'convincing' the giant house sized dinosaur to chase her instead of the grass eating dinosaur.
All while an inner voice that sounded a lot like Akane called her a suicidal idiot.
AN: Remember how in the next Tenka'ichi Budōkai Goku loses by ring out despite being so strong he can tank a technique so dangerous it should have killed him? Here Ranma loses by ring out despite the fact he should have been able to win the fight otherwise.
That's right you aren't a Dragon Ball protagonist if you don't lose at least one Tenka'ichi Budōkai by ring out! That's why Gohan could never cut it.
