Of Gods and...Men? (DxD Reincarnation Dual SI)
- Thread starter Xanothos
- Start date
Ink Garden
Enlightenment Through Savagery
- Location
- Ghana
Looking forward to the inevitable media circus. Normal humans are just so fun~Xanothos said:
- Location
- Elsewhere
- Location
- Southern California
So @Xanothos are you Asia or Gasper? If your Gasper then I have to say I love the fact that your a combination of Dio Brando and Hellsing Abridged Alucard. If your Asia.......you son of bitch I'm so jealous. Not about the fact that you failed to save anyone in from that badshit crazy sadistic Archbishop (and holy shit I am having major Deja vu writing that) but the fact that your basically dating Xenovia and it's only a matter of time until you sleep with her. Oh and of course you have the power that makes going to medical school pointless which isn't another reason to make me jealous, nope not one bit......ok I'm really jealous.
Anyway I can't wait to see more.
Anyway I can't wait to see more.
Beyogi
and a fairy
- Pronouns
- She/Her
I think Xenovia is actually his? sister. As in grown up together since they were very young so assuming normal human imprinting processes did their thing it's quite unlikely they'd have a relationship that way.
Meanwhile I wonder if Asia is actually male or female. The first post kinda hinted that one of them would be female. But since Gasper clearly has the danglies even if he doesn't look it I wonder if Asia is actually a girl/transgendered.
- Location
- Southern California
That is actually a very good point.
That is also a very good point. I'm 90% sure that Asia SI is now a guy because of this:
Though I could be wrong since only a few paragraphs above it has this:
So honestly the way I see it they most likely swapped with the original Asia and Gasper (not even gonna question what happen to those two). But honestly does really matter in the end what gender they are?
- Location
- Scotland
As it happens, @Xanothos inserted as Gasper, while I, TENIN, inserted as Asia. And yeah, being inserted as Asia would be kind of awesome if it weren't for the horrifying consequences of failure, the constant exposure to the worst of humanity both physical and metaphysical and the fact that it basically comes with a destiny that involves tap-dancing on the edge of the apocalypse.
It still is kind of awesome, though.
Normally, kids raised together from a young age would imprint on one another that way. There's only two issues with that for Xenovia and Asia:
-Asia started life with nineteen years of memory, including some knowledge of the future, and did a very bad job of hiding the former though they kept the latter under their hat.
-Xenovia already had an established family—key-word being had—and was not in any way looking to replace them.
As for the gender thing...
Con-fu-sion; it's such a wonderful thing~
I'll give you a clue:
One of your guesses is right.
- Location
- Southern California
I should have known from the count of monte Cristo themed cafe.
Soooo basically most young adult supernatural novel series that has the main characters go through a shitty life.
Well that's an interesting tidbit.
So possible romantic relationship with her in the future yea or nay?
Seihai-kun
[Unverified Wish Granting Device]
- Location
- Brasil
As I said in the SB thread: I've shipped people for less.
Xanothos
"Fate is not a cage except for those who fear it."
- Location
- The Space Between Words
All will be revealed...in time.
*Devilish Cackling*
Sonifri
Is this the face of a villain?
- Location
- Texas
Transformation Magic is a thing in DxD. Sirzechs used that school of magic to become a cat for a while. It's not devil specific so any magic user willing to put in the effort could do so.
Whether they were born male or female, Asia is a magician. Much like Gozer, "It's whatever it wants to be!"
Whether they were born male or female, Asia is a magician. Much like Gozer, "It's whatever it wants to be!"
LordVile
There's thinking and thinking with explosives.
- Location
- INDIA
And a real fucking vampire.
That official?
Please let that be official.
A truly vexing dilemma.
Well, if you managed that, then Michael might just surrender heaven's regency to you.
Azazel comes to mind as the epitome of such taste.
No Hellsing Ultimate Abridged jokes?
None at all?
This story ticks all my right boxes.
Imma watching this and following you.
Please keep the goodness flowing.
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Chapter Four: In Search of Little Selzen
Xanothos
"Fate is not a cage except for those who fear it."
- Location
- The Space Between Words
Chapter Four: In Search of Little Selzen
Gasper
Ting. Clink. Ting. Clink.
I listened idly to the sounds of metal on crystal as I fiddled with the chain draped around my neck as a necklace. Or, more specifically, the crystalline phial that dangled from it.
"For your loyalty to my sister, as well as your contributions to her defeat of Riser Phenex, I offer you a boon. What say you?"
Sirzechs' offer had been generous, as had the boon he provided – but then I had played a fairly large part in the Rating Game. It was to be expected that helping his precious sister slip her bonds and be free of that half-baked turkey's unwelcome attentions would earn his gratitude, and the gratitude of a siscon was not to be underestimated. Especially when said siscon was one of the Maō.
"Eiiiii!"
A cute martial arts kiai followed immediately by a muffled, pained grunt snapped me from my reverie and I returned my attention to my fellow Peerage members. I had convinced Rias to move up our first group training session so we'd be more ready for Kokabiel (though of course I didn't mention the Cadre, I had no way of proving my knowledge true), and it was going well.
Kiba darted to and fro, rarely staying in one place for more than a moment. The reason for this was obvious for any onlooker, as Akeno's lightning bolts scorched the ground bare moments after Kiba moved.
Rias and I, by contrast, were still as statues; the only hint of movement on either of our parts was the corcusating corona of cackling crimson surrounding my King and the squirming strands of shadow sprouting here and there around me. And as for the others?
Koneko was doing her damnedest to beat Issei into the ground so he'd learn how to awaken his Scale Mail instinctively in times of stress.
…
What? I certainly didn't have an ulterior motive when I chose this method of training, and it had nothing to do with him mistaking me for a girl. The dark chuckle I let out while looking over at Issei frantically attempting to dodge Koneko's literally earthshaking blows was completely unrelated to his suffering.
As we sat facing one another in the lotus position, an orb of deepest crimson detached itself from Rias' freshly named Destruction Mantle and hurtled towards my face even as she commented, "You are enjoying this far too much for it to be healthy, Gasper."
In response to her attack, ten tenebrous tendrils lashed out at the sphere of starved entropy given form. Each one was summarily devoured, but each one nudged the attack slightly off course and robbed it of some momentum and power. By the time it reached me, it impacted the ground beside me with little more than a puff of displaced dirt.
In tandem, I replied to both her attack and statement, "I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about, O' King mine." Even as I spoke, a spike of shadow surged from before me and struck with snake-like abruptness for her throat. A thin plane of blood red Destruction snapped into being in front of Rias, consuming both itself and the attack before shattering...but not the second spike that had been hidden in the wake of the first.
The abyssal blade snapped to stillness a centimeter in front of her clavicle.
A crimson eyebrow twitched.
With a demure smile, I admonished my King, "Learn to look underneath the underneath, you must. Hmmhmm."
Rias chuckled as we both let our magic recede, our intent made manifest retreating into us until we next called for it. "Mixing your references a bit there, aren't you?"
My only response was a smirk, which widened at the cries of pain coming from a certain pervert. The two of us turned to look at Koneko and Issei, finding that Koneko was standing over Issei as he lay groaning in the middle of a crater.
Koneko met my eyes with a barely noticeable twinkle in her own, and I nodded.
With a small huff of effort, she raised her leg in preparation for her next attack...and brought her heel down in an axe blow towards Issei's crotch.
Issei screamed in horror, and his body was engulfed in light. There was a dull thump and a hiss from Koneko, as her foot collided with the codpiece of Issei's Scale Mail.
Apparently, after repeated beatings, the threat of Loli-induced blunt force castration was deemed a sufficient threat to trigger his Balance Breaker.
…
To be fair, that would probably be true of any male Sacred Gear user.
I clapped my hands. "Alright! Good job, Koneko, Hyoudou-kun!" Issei whimpered at the beatific, merciless smile on my face. "Now we'll see how long you can last. Girls don't like one-pump chumps, after all."
Unsurprisingly, this seemed to ignite a fervor in Issei. He raised his fists in an approximation of Koneko's usual stance that was half-decent, surprisingly.
'I suppose he can learn about things other than boobs, if he managed to pick up on that.'
Koneko gave him a look that might've been grudging approval, if the observer slammed back enough high-proof spirits and squinted.
The two circled for a few moments, then Issei rushed forward in tandem with the shout of [BOOST!] that echoed from his arm.
Koneko caught said arm with perfect ease and flowed around him like air, performing a textbook-perfect armlock as she forced him to the ground. "...Too slow, Ise-chi."
After Koneko let him up, they reset their stances. Ddraig called out a second time, further doubling Issei's power. This time, it was Koneko who was the first to strike, and even as the petite Rook closed with her opponent Issei received another Boost.
It had been sixteen seconds already, and Issei still had his Balance Breaker active. On the other hand, he seemed to be limiting his Boosts to one every 5 seconds, rather than a continuous stream that would go until he couldn't handle any more power.
A surprisingly smart choice, coming from Issei. I'd have to ask about that.
A few minutes and a few clashes later, Scale Mail dissipated and Issei took a knee. He'd stopped his periodic Boosting about a minute in, which was probably why he managed to keep going for another two minutes and change.
Never let it be said that I failed to give praise where praise was due. "Not bad, Hyoudou-kun. You managed three and a half minutes, and by the end of that period you were at…" I did some quick mental arithmetic. "Twelve Boosts, and you held 'em for about two and a half minutes. Impressive progress, kiddo."
Before Issei could reply, he was bowled over. Kiba, in his tiredness, hadn't registered his kneeling comrade, and the duo were now tangled in a heap. As Knight and Pawn groaned in tandem, I felt the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. Not a second later, a bolt of lightning split the sky and slammed into them both. Twin shrieks of pain pierced the air as the lightning dissipated.
Akeno walked over, one hand on her cheek and a blissful expression on her face. "Oh dear. Did little old me do that much damage? I'm sorry Ise-kun, Kiba-kun. I was just so...pent up." She shook a finger at Kiba admonishingly. "It's rude to tease a woman and refuse to give her release."
Issei turned red at the innuendo, while Kiba merely gave a polite—if pained—smile.
Koneko, however, stared at Akeno disapprovingly.
Rias, a strange expression on her face, called the training to a halt, and we filed inside for showers and an after-workout snack. One boon of Devil magic was that it was remarkably easy to stay fit as long as you trained semi-regularly, so we could eat anything we wanted.
After we'd undergone our various hygiene rituals, we met back up in the club room. I was the second one to arrive as Rias had, predictably, showered there. As designated cook, I set about putting the snack plates together.
To the surprise of absolutely nobody, Koneko's was the largest by several orders of magnitude.
My own was the next largest, followed by Kiba's. Akeno, Rias and Issei would divide the remaining snacks among themselves.
As the other members of the Peerage filed into the room, I passed out the plates of food, and for a while, the room was silent but for the sounds of chewing and clattering cutlery.
Eventually, though, Issei sat his fork down and looked over at me.
"Gasper-chan, thanks again for helping me figure out Balance Breaker; Ddraig says that as long as I can remember that feeling I had, I'll be able to call it out." He winced. "But didja have to tell her to do that?"
I gave a toothy smile as I set down my half-eaten eclair. "I have no clue what you're talking about, Hyoudou-kun. That training was perfectly normal."
Judging by the look on his face, had Issei been in possession of an Xbox controller, he'd be mashing X to doubt.
I merely smiled and held out my fist to Koneko, who knocked knuckles with me.
Truly, this was my family.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Asia
"...of yourself, selling false images of the Lord's servants!"
I sighed to myself as I chewed on some onigiri, leaning against a shop-front in the shade of its awning. Xenovia was doing the same beside me as we watched Irina lecture the owner of an 'antique art' store which was either a money laundering outfit or the owner's way of letting their kid be 'a successful artist'. She'd been going for five minutes strong by this point, which just went to show that she had far too much energy for someone who had been as relentlessly beaten by the mid-day sun as we had been.
"I swear the sun in Italy isn't this bad," I muttered to myself between bites.
Xenovia turned a bland look on me. "It only seems that way because you refuse to wear your official robes whenever you can get away with having them off."
I glared at her in return. "Hey, I do wear them!" I wore them tied around my neck so they formed a cape, admittedly, but that was technically wearing them!
The look Xenovia gave me was oddly pitying, and I buried the sting of it beneath another mouthful of Japanese snack-food. It wasn't my fault I couldn't handle high temperatures well.
"I swear, there didn't use to be people like that in Kuoh…" Irina muttered as she stalked over to us, swiping the onigiri I held out to her and tearing a bite off it like a wild dog.
'On the one hand, I'm glad I managed to teach Irina not to fall for obvious scams,' I considered, 'but on the other hand, I wish I'd spent more time teaching her to tone down the religious fervor.'
There was a joke to be made about the Protestant member of our trio being the violent one. Hell if I was going to make it, though.
"Since our target wasn't there," Xenovia began, and I sighed.
"Xenovia, please don't call everyone we go looking for a 'target'. We just wanted to talk to the guy."
Raptor eyes blinked at me. "Since our target wasn't there," Xenovia began again, and I threw up my (now empty) hands in disgust. "We have officially run out of people who even passingly knew the Vatican-related citizens in town."
"Whoever killed them was really thorough in their work…" Irina said, looking thoughtful.
I didn't like my robes very much—or at least wearing them 'properly'—but I was thankful for the way they hid my clenched fist. Surely, if I'd gone looking for it, there would have been at least one opportunity…?
"Asia."
I looked up at Xenovia, who had walked out from under the awning. Sometimes, sunlight on black hair makes it seem blue. On Xenovia's, it creates a shine like cobalt. "We're moving out."
"Right," I muttered, wadding up the onigiri wrappings and tossing them into a bin across the street as I headed off after my teammates.
I had another failure to atone for, and we'd only examined the parts of the city where those killed for their church connections (or their connections to those whose social connections had church connections) had died. There was a lot more ground to cover.
God, but this would be so much easier if I could use it properly – but…
—hatekillpreyhuntmurderdevourdiediediejustdiehateyouhateyoualljustdiealreadyhunthuntdevourkill—
I shook my head and took a deep breath, closing and opening my fist as I walked and feeling the tendons creak.
Yeah. That wasn't happening any time soon.
So, under the Spring sun, a Catholic, a Protestant and a blond went looking for a priest.
-x-x-x-
I had no idea who was in charge of constructing the underground complex beneath the church, but I definitely owed them a favour if I ever met them.
There was a bath facility. A bloody great underground pool with Greco-Roman decoration, the water in which was perpetually warm and clean, apparently with an ancillary ability of cleaning other things that entered the bath. I had no idea how, and frankly, I didn't particularly care if it was fuelled by the sacrifice of unborn souls so long as I could have a long soak at the end of the day.
...Okay, I might care a bit if there was any soul-sacrificing going on. I'd probably be fine with small animals though.
Getting out of the bath was always a task that drew heavily on my own willpower, but I still went to towel off after a half hour or so. Once I was dry, I raised my hands over my neatly-folded pile of clothes, closed my eyes for a moment and built the spell in my mind as the words poured from my lips. "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow."
As I opened my eyes, feeling the rush of warmth in my hands and watching my spell-circle spin around as it descended through my pile of clothes and brought them back to the height of cleanliness, I snorted to myself.
'Whiter than snow'. I hadn't been that way for a long time.
I was just finishing lacing up my boots, having donned my underwear, jeans and black t-shirt already, when Xenovia walked in. I picked up the pace of my knot-tying in response, making it out the door to the baths before she'd done more than remove her robes.
"I swear, she comes in earlier each time…" I muttered to myself as I walked through the underground complex, nodding to Irina as I passed her in the chapel. I'd be taking over sentry duty now, so she was clear to go and join Xenovia.
I thought I heard her mutter something as she turned to walk away, but I didn't catch more than 'earlier' and 'drastic' before she disappeared.
Oh well. If it was important, Xenovia and I would hear about it soon enough. It was Irina, after all.
I wandered around the chapel for a few minutes, running my fingers along the walls, pews and altar, squinting at the windows in their magically-repaired frames to make sure we hadn't missed any fragilities in the glass.
Then, when that was done, I bit the bullet and headed outside.
The doors sealed behind me with a burst of Light as usual, which should be more than enough for keeping anything out – or at least alerting the others if the wards were breached. Sentry duty was mostly paranoia when we had a defensible position like this, but as any experienced Exorcist knew, paranoia was just a well-developed survival instinct.
Tonight, however, I needed to cultivate a different kind of instinct.
I walked out into the woods humming 'The Hanging Tree' to myself, not particularly bothered about the strange shadows cast by canopy and trunks as pale moonlight lit the way. Of the fears I still possessed, the dark wasn't among them.
Besides – the odds were that, of all the dark and dangerous things the woods may hold, I was far and away the worst. Or so I told myself.
I came to a stop while the church was still visible, closing my eyes and steadying my breathing. The forest was...not quite a presence, but it registered on my senses. Its life, its history, its most basic form of consciousness. This was an old forest, and like any old forest it had a mind of its own.
Not much of a mind, but a mind nonetheless – and in the end that was what mattered.
So I turned around, placed my back to a trunk and sat down, leaning my head against the bark and closing my eyes.
And with my next breath, I took in the forest.
—huntpreyescapepredatorhuntpreyescapepredatorgrowsunlightleechwaterpoisoninsectsdevourleavesdevourinsectsdevourbirdshuntpreybloodmeatkilldevourdevourdevour—
I gasped out my lungs' contents, faintly hoping I was imagining the tendrils of curling black that came out with it, illuminated by the emerald glow emanating from my eyes. I traced their progress as they vanished among the other shadows of the forest while I waited for my heartbeat to slow once more, the regular action of my breathing drawing my mind back to the centre as it always did.
An old forest. An old mind. And a whole lot of old blood.
Of course. The Devils had chosen to claim this land for a reason, after all.
"Nothing can ever be easy…" I sighed as I adjusted my sitting position, looking up at the moon.
"Ain't that the truth, brother," a now-familiar voice echoed from the shadows beside me as Gasper – no, Johan, walked out from behind a tree. He regarded me over the top of his ever-present shades and said mildly, "You look like shit, Donne."
I quirked a grin. "Well that's a fine how-do-you-do and no mistake, brother." I sniffed imperiously. "And it's your damn fault anyway."
"Oh, this ought to be good." The Dhampir gestured for me to elaborate.
"Xenovia noticed I'd been crying when I got back to the church last night," I told him, "and like she always does she got all worked up and went to try and kick-start a new crusade."
Johan's shoulders began to shake as he let out a panicked giggle. He quickly devolved into frankly concerning cackling, one palm grasping his forehead as he threw his head back like he was attempting to prevent his manic convulsions launching his brain out of his skull.
Then the laughter cut out in the space of a second, and Johan looked at me with dead eyes. "I'm so fucking dead. I'm leaving my candy to Koneko, but you can have my cookbooks."
I laughed as I re-settled myself in a more comfortable position. "It'll be fine as long as you don't get on Xenovia's radar again for the near future. I wore her out before she could leave the church, so for the moment she's willing to bide her time and store the grudge." Idly, I reached out and rubbed my hip, remembering a particularly nasty fall after having my legs swept. "I'm really glad I have Twilight Healing, though. All the walking we had to do today would have been a nightmare otherwise."
Johan snorted. "If I didn't know you as well as I do, Donne, I'd think you were talking about something completely different. But as you once told me, 'matters of the bedroom should remain there'."
I could feel the insidious blush spreading up from my neck and across my cheeks as I caught my own double-entendre. Gah, why couldn't I have been born with some kind of power that would let me control my facial expressions? Some spell that could stop me from blushing would just be the most useful thing ever sometimes.
"I doubt that sentiment has changed all that much while living in the Vatican, of all places."
I coughed into my hand, turning away from my friend to the church. The church, where Xenovia was. The church, where Xenovia was currently taking a ba–
I almost cracked the tree I was sitting against in half when I slammed my head backwards, riding out the pain as had become second nature but wincing as I felt the forest recede just the tiniest bit. "Dammit…"
Close my eyes. In, out. In, out. Then reach to the forest and draw in—
—growsunlightleechwaterpoisoninsectsdevour—
—before you push out, loop it back around into the tree and let it grow.
It only took a few seconds for the tree to return to its prior health, if not a better state, but afterwards I was left panting as I re-centred myself.
"...You really have Senjutsu. I didn't doubt you, but...damn. Seeing and feeling it is something else." Johan crossed his arms and leaned against a tree. "I guess you reached it through Touki? Considering how you don't have any weapons on you…"
"You remembered Touki, huh?" I asked, forming a wry grin and not waiting for an answer to continue, "Yeah, that was how it started. I managed to start using Touki...two years ago, now?" I whistled. "Feels like longer. But it took me more than a decade of training to raise my ki to a level where I could do something with it. At least an hour of training every day I could possibly manage it since the first day I realised I couldn't use Light weapons."
"Of course I remembered Touki," Johan replied, "I maintain that Sairaorg should've been the protagonist, and I'm sure you remembered how I'd wax poetic about Kuroka." Johan then fixed me with a stare. "No Light weapons, huh? I can wager a guess why, but that's kinda irrelevant, isn't it?"
I smiled, and even I didn't think it was a happy expression as I slowly began to answer the implied question. "My decision to become an Exorcist was opposed...almost universally, in the Vatican," I recounted, "and even now there are people who think I should be waiting in a medical centre somewhere to heal incoming injured or out doing missionary duty in some far-flung country." I raised a hand in front of myself. "And from the first time I stood in basic weapons class and completely failed to activate a Light Sword, they've always called me the same thing.
"The Talentless Exorcist."
I sighed as I leaned back against the tree more fully. "I can't use Light even slightly. An Excalibur is nothing but metal in my hand; they don't even reject me. My prayers never reach God's system. My bible readings are just incantations for my spells because there's nothing behind them where there should be Light.
"If not for having been left at a Vatican orphanage and gifted with Twilight Healing, I could never have been an Exorcist." My raised hand clenched into a fist. "But I worked. Every day for so very long, I worked so much. When I sprained something or broke something or started bleeding, I would use Twilight Healing and get back to work until I collapsed. Then I'd speed my muscles' recovery so I could train again after I took a break without getting diminishing returns."
I brought my fist across my chest, breathing in and reaching inward–
And when I slammed my fist outward in a backhand, the luminescent emerald aura that blazed around it lit the forest. Of course, that wasn't quite as impressive as the massive rush of wind that was pressed out of my fist's path, rustling branches and tearing off leaves in a cone to my side.
I watched the trees shake in irritation even as I lowered my hand again, Touki—my life energy, my vitality, arm and armour of the heart's blood—fading away and leaving the moonlight once again. "I chose the most difficult path I had available for no reason but pride," I admitted, "but I showed them."
I turned back to Johan and met his gaze through the sunglasses. "I'm utterly talentless as an Exorcist. But I'm still good enough to stand alongside any Holy Sword wielder, and that is what matters."
Johan tilted his shades down so I could see his raised brows. "'Utterly talentless' he says, after showing off Touki and Senjutsu. If the Church truly believes that you aren't a true Exorcist because you can't use Light, then…" He let out a sigh. "I pity them." He fixed me with a feral grin, made all the more alarming by his fangs. "That said, you have got to teach me that."
Johan then winced. "Though that might be an issue, because of where on the 'battle lines' we both lie." He shook his head. "Feh. Rias wouldn't make me fight you, and I wouldn't even if all four Maō ordered me to."
"And the Vatican owes me at least five consecutive months of vacation days at this point, during which they don't get to dictate what I can and can't do." I grinned in return. Then, after a moment, I became sombre again. "...Though, I suppose we'll both have to be alive at the end of this shitshow to make good on that, won't we?"
"We will survive this, even if I have to beg Azazel and Michael to intervene along with the Maō." Johan's face was a mask of grim determination, though it quickly reshaped itself into a mischievous smile. "And like I said, I've got an ace up my sleeve as well...or rather, under my shirt."
He pulled a chain up from around his neck and waved the crimson crystal at me. "Care to guess?"
"Well, fairly good odds it's blood," I said after a moment's thought, "but I take it the 'who' is the important bit?"
"As smart as ever, Donne-chan," replied Johan in a sing-song voice.
"So the question then becomes: whose blood did you get ahold of that would put such a shit-eating grin on your face?" I continued, pulling one of my knees to my chest and draping an arm across it to rest my chin on. I stared at Johan in that pose for a long few moments, focussing on his eyes. "...It's not Issei."
Johan snorted. "Hell no. Blood of a dragon or not, there's no way in hell I'm taking any part of him into my body. Any other guesses?"
I tapped the fingers of my free hand against a root, thinking it through. "...Someone you've have been in contact with and fought against…" Johan's grin widened slightly, and my train of thought splintered. "...No. Not necessarily fought."
My fingers stopped tapping. "There's only a few people with blood powerful enough to matter that you could have run into by now, even in Rias' social circles. And there's none that would just hand over some of their own blood to a Dhampir...unless they felt they owed something."
I grinned. "So tell me – how badly did you have to beat Riser's ass to get one of Rias' family to pay you in blood money?"
Johan let out a cackle that wouldn't have been out of place coming from a witch. "I used my shadows to literally baste the fucker with Holy Water."
I laughed in open amusement, raising an open palm into the air wordlessly. Johan slapped it barely a moment later. "Glad to hear it," I told him, "I think I remember that he pulled his head out of his ass at some point, but Big-J Almighty I might not have minded being kidnapped by Fallen if I got the chance to punt his family jewels into his big mouth."
Johan's cackles subsided into chuckles. "I can't blame you for that; he was as much of a douche-nozzle in person as he was on-screen."
Johan shook his head. "But enough about that undercooked turkey; you said 'one of Rias' family' gave me blood. Correct, but that doesn't quite describe the significance of the gift."
I nodded. "So, it was him then. I wasn't quite sure if he'd manage to sneak that past everyone else, but more power to him for it."
Johan nodded. "The man can be subtle when the situation calls for it. He'd have to have some discretion to be a Maō, after all."
I shrugged. "Fair enough." I stared at the glinting red phial for a few moments, then sighed and leaned back against the tree once more. "...Just how much of a trump card are we talking here?"
Johan slipped it beneath his shirt. "Well, if I recall correctly, Issei's blood was enough to trigger Balance Breaker in the original timeline. So...at the bare minimum, I'll be able to use that. Beyond that, I'm sure there'll be a significant boost in my power. Whether whatever that is will be enough to hold off Kokabiel is anyone's guess." Johan spread his arms helplessly. "It's a fair bit better than nothing, so I'll take it."
I nodded. There was really only so much we could do to prepare for a fight so very, very far out of our leagues. Even such a complete wildcard as an unknown Balance Breaker would be welcome if the alternative was nothing.
The mood felt...dark, then. Johan had lifted it enough, I decided; I might as well pull my own weight. Besides, I owed him back for his teasing. "So, you're juicing up right before the big day, huh?" I asked, pasting on a grin. "Never took you for a compensator, Johan."
Johan's eyes gleamed. "Hah! Well, if I had my way, my choice of partners wouldn't be a two-thousand-year-old genocidal Fallen Angel, but beggars can't be choosers. It's only natural that I'd need an edge, as outside my preferences as he is."
"Well, if you're that worried about your performance, go on ahead," I said, waving a hand daintily off to the side like I was shooing a particularly obstinate mote of dust. "The rest of us natural workers will be right there to show you what's what." My grin widened. "Though of course, Balance Breaker is hardly natural, is it?"
Johan crossed his arms, his grin matching my own. "Natural or artificial, it's what you do with it and how skillfully you use it that counts. And I'll do my damnedest to leave Kokabiel exhausted and spent after I'm done."
I nodded. "Same here." I sighed, hanging my head. "Though honestly, I'm not sure how much good my little bag of tricks will do me. There's only one or two tools in there that might stand a chance, and...well." I shrugged. "Neither of them's my favourite thing in the world to use."
Johan nodded seriously. "Well, sometimes you've got to think of your partner before yourself. Even if it's something you don't like, if it works for them, sometimes it's worth it."
"Wise words, my friend," I replied, rising to my feet and clapping a hand on Johan's shoulder. "I suppose I'd better keep them in mind moving forward."
"Indeed, indeed," Johan replied, "after all, you never know what kinds of stuff Xenovia will want you to do." His grin widened further.
I scowled, dope-slapping my friend with about as much force as I might use in a particularly irritated flick. So, roughly the equivalent of being smacked with a heavy pillow. "Do you have to keep up with that? We both know it wouldn't work."
Johan waved a hand dismissively. "Pish-tish. That's defeatist talk. Even if you don't believe in the potential for a relationship, I do. Donne, you must believe in the shipper who believes in you."
I let out a frustrated sigh, rubbing a hand back and forth through my hair. I'd raised this argument so many times over the years that I'd run out patience with myself over it. Anybody else never had a chance. "No, Johan, it just – look, she wouldn't – I can't—"
I bit down a keening shriek. "Look, the truth is..."
-x-x-x-
"...I already knew, you daft bastard. My point stands."
-x-x-x-
"...I already knew, you daft bastard. My point stands."
-x-x-x-
I lowered my face into my palms, sighing as I leaned back against my tree with a thud but remained standing. "Johan...I appreciate the faith, I always have, but...you can see the problem can't you, with those vaunted eyes of yours? You do remember why Xenovia even stayed?"
Johan turned to me and planted his fists against his hips. "First of all, my eyes don't need to see fine in the darkness to see your point. However, you seem to be forgetting we live in a literally magical world. Shit like this?" He gestured vaguely at me. "That's solvable. It's whether you two have chemistry that matters." He scratched his cheek. "I know the quality of my advice is dubious, considering the fact that I'm oh-for-two at dying a virgin, but I think my point is still valid."
He clapped me on the shoulder. "Just make me godfather alongside Dulio, eh?"
The dope-slap this time was closer to being walloped with a brick. "Of course, you realise all of this talk means precisely diddly squat if, as I expect, she just doesn't feel the same way?"
Johan nodded sagely. "A fair point. My counter-argument: this world is of a...certain persuasion when it comes to romance and tropes. You've been around one another for what...more than ten years, I'd wager?"
"Twelve years," I muttered.
Johan nodded. "And in that time, you've been fairly close; having one another's back, compensating for each other's flaws, I assume?"
A veritable documentary flashed behind my eyes. "...There might have been one or two instances of things to that effect, yes."
Johan eyed me with a gaze that begged me to not treat him like a mushroom. "...Sure. Anyways, third and final question: Has her behavior changed in any way, especially when it comes to things like physical contact, bathing, eating together, or you being around strangers?"
I caught myself before I could look back at the church. Just barely, but I did. My answer was probably written all over my face anyway though. "...Maybe a bit."
Johan rolled his eyes. "I know what downplaying something sounds like, dear." He shrugged, then continued. "In any case, in our world those are pretty solid indicators of a desire to at least try something more. Here? In the world that practically conspires to cause panty-shots and lewd clothing damage?" He didn't finish his statement, but the look he gave me told me more than enough.
"Speaking from experience?" I asked, partly out of curiosity and party out of a wish to change the subject.
Johan shuddered. "Fucking Akeno and her fucking King's Game orders. I thought I was done being forced into skirts when I escaped Romania. Boy was I wrong."
I thought about laughing for a moment. Then I remembered the 'combat uniforms' that the Vatican had issued before I burned them and asked Griselda for something with actual armour value.
...Perhaps I had no Light Element because all the divinity involved with me was the blessing of ignorance regarding the way this world worked?
...Actually, no. I was probably just inured because I wasn't anywhere near the main character.
Except, now I was.
...fuuuuuuuck.
"I'd really kind of hoped that wasn't as bad as it seemed from the other side," I sighed.
Johan's sigh matched my own. "You and me both. Why do you think I spend so much time as a genderless, two-dimensional shadow? It's not because I'm an edgelord, I'll tell you that much." He tapped the side of his head in a familiar fashion. "They can't strip you if you don't have clothes or a body."
"I'll have to remember that one," I mused, chuckling.
Johan shook a finger at me. "Don't you think for a moment that you've distracted me; I'm a shipper. We are undying, unending, unrelenting. We are legion, and we cannot be sto—" I rolled my eyes and dope-slapped him again, this time with the force of a pillowcase full of bricks, because if I was good at anything it was putting new spins on old tricks.
Johan looked at me with both amusement and a small wince. "Maō below, you really are a little Tsunade, aren't you?"
He rubbed the back of his head. "Stupid antics aside, I really do think you should at least talk it over with her. Even if the worst case scenario happens and she turns you down, it'll be better for you in the long run. But I don't need to tell you that." He furrowed his brow. "Ah...that last bit might've been a bit over the line. I apologize."
I managed a small smile. "Don't. She's worlds away and seventeen years in the past, Johan. If I spent all these years asking myself if she'd have picked me in the end…" I shook my head. "Well. It doesn't matter now, does it?"
I turned towards the church, almost imagining I could feel piercing yellow eyes meeting my own from the window.
Johan nodded soberly, then seemed to draw himself up. "Bah! Carpe Diem, or whatever. I'm sure you'll be telling me the same thing at some point, if I can find someone." He shivered. "Dating Rias, Akeno or Koneko would be too much like dating one of my old nieces, age differences be damned. Fuuuuuuck that noise. I'm not into that shit."
"Good to know you haven't changed too much in the past seventeen years." I smiled, then looked up at the moon, which was almost directly overhead. "I'd best get back inside. If Xenovia comes looking for me and finds you here…"
"She'll undoubtedly challenge me for your hand, before lopping my head off with Roland's sword," replied Johan with a grin that didn't quite mask his nervousness at the prospect of seeing Xenovia.
I shook my head wryly. "Sorry Johan, but...there's really no contest there."
Johan grabbed his chest as though mortally struck, and began a dramatic monologue. "You wound me, good sir! As though I would pursue your hand while you have eyes for another! What do you take me for, some sort of netorare-liking savage?!" He finished his performance by staggering about and falling to one knee.
"Of course not!" I laughed, shaking my head and clasping my hands behind my back as I walked back towards the church. "If I did, I'd have to kill you!"
Johan rose with his own laughter. "Bah! If I did, I'd kill myself!" With that closing statement, Johan called out a farewell. "Good luck and Godspeed!" A hiss of pain followed his words, certainly from using His name.
"May the Devil drive you home!" I called back, a few steps before the edge of the treeline.
When I turned to look back over my shoulder, Johan was gone.
I turned slowly back to the church, stepping forward deliberately and resting my hand on the wood of the door. "...Carpe diem, huh?" I muttered aloud.
I pushed the door open.
"Asia," Xenovia greeted me, "is the perimeter secure?"
"Yup." I nodded, stepping inside. "No signs of intelligent life anywhere."
...Maybe Johan had a point. But until this mess was over with…
"Then come in and close the door," Xenovia commanded, turning to head underground. "Irina is making curry tonight."
"Right!"
...I didn't want to risk what I had just yet.
The door shut behind me with a soft thump.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Gasper
I looked up at the moon as I walked back from the church, electing to enjoy the cool caress of the night air instead of taking the quick way back. This had the helpful side effect of giving me a bit of time to think about the discussion I'd had with Donne.
…
Somehow, I knew that the cheeky fuck would rationalize waiting due to the mess we were about to be flung into ass-first, rather than going for broke so that he'd be able to go into battle with no regrets. Then again, I'd meddled enough in that aspect of his life...for now.
I stopped at a 24 hour convenience store and bought some onigiri, then continued back towards the school, intent on knocking out a few online contracts before the sun rose and I set. Even in my past life, I'd been pretty nocturnal, but now that I was a Devil and a Dhampir? Well. The past few days had been anomalous; I usually rose at sunset and went to bed before sunrise.
As I munched my snack, the lyrics to 'Whips and Things' played from my pocketed phone. Swallowing the mouthful of rice and steamed pork, I answered, "Vladi's Crematorium, you ghost 'em, we'll roast 'em."
A tinkling laugh came across the line. "Ah, Gasper-kun. You never fail to amuse."
I smiled fondly. "Always glad to oblige, Akeno-chan. Anyways, what can I do for you?"
I could hear her rustle papers in the background. "It looks like you've got a contractor wanting to meet with you...a Yukimura-san?"
"Oh, you mean Haseo-san? I'm actually pretty close to his house right now; I'll swing by there on foot."
"Alright then, Gasper-kun. Be safe, you hear me?" The note of concern in her voice was unusual, but unsurprising given the circumstances.
"Of course. I have the rare advantage of 'common sense', after all."
Akeno let out a soft, fond chuckle. "I can't argue with that. Well, I'm going to head to bed, but don't hesitate to call if you need anything."
"Will do. Goodnight, Akeno-chan." After she bid me good night, I hung up, polished off my onigiri, and sank into the shadows. Since I was only about five minutes away from the Yukimura household on foot, I almost immediately re-emerged in from of it.
And suddenly, I was on edge.
An ominous air surrounded the suburban home. I could practically taste the Light emanating from the place. It was as strong as either of the Excalibur Fragments that Xenovia and Irina had shown off, but its...flavor was distinct.
A growl rose deep within my throat. "Freed."
I fished in my pocket for my phone and quickly hit redial. I flowed towards the house's side entrance with all the shadowed grace of one descended from the Lords of the Night, silent as the grave, noting the way the front door hung off its hinges as I considered the best approach to take—
—then my mind ground to a halt as I heard a high-pitched scream come from within the building. I broke into a sprint, abandoning stealth entirely as I recalled one extremely important fact.
Haseo Yukimura had an eight-year-old daughter.
AN: My apologies for the wait, my co-author Teninshigen had some stuff IRL he had to handle. However, we're back, and should manage to continue to update with some regularity. Enjoy!
Xanothos
"Fate is not a cage except for those who fear it."
- Location
- The Space Between Words
Knew I was forgetting something. Thanks!
Falzyker
2020! What will you try now?
- Location
- Somewhere with Bad Internet.
It's quite obvious that the Light didn't work for him because he knew that the G-man was dead... He also didn't have a Naaru to siphon power from.
GO! Quickly! Save the imouto and kill the asshole!
- Location
- Elsewhere
You realize this makes things worse, right?
You are chuckling evilly for some reason which isn't because of his suffering, which means you have further plans.
Which means you will get some other revenge, and the training will continue regardless.
Shipper's motto: "I believe in you! And you, and you and him, and that thing... all at the same time!"
Unfortunately that persuasion is: "Everything with tits falls for Issei."
So yeah, have fun with that.
Sonifri
Is this the face of a villain?
- Location
- Texas
Need to test this.
Make a tree grow tits. See if it manages to collapse onto Issei during a battle.
- Location
- Elsewhere
"Aha, I have finally found the perfect way to defeat you Issei!"
"You will never win, Evil Do-er!"
"I have the Venus de Milo."
"Um, yes you do. So what?"
"You will notice that it has boobies."
"Yes it does, they are very nice."
"I will now fling the Venus de Milo off this museum!"
"What!?! Why would you do that?!?"
"It will surely be shattered on the concrete steps... unless you dive under it and are crushed instead!"
"There is no way I will fall for your dastardly scheme!"
*push*
"Nooooo!"
*splorch*
And that is how the Red Dragon Emperor was finally killed.
Rias sets down the puppets and the barbie doll.
"Do you understand the moral of the story Issei?"
"...the Venus de Milo has nice boobies?"
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- Location
- England
And the title is: 'Of Gods and... Men?'
Oh God, they haven't switched genders from the original.
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- Location
- Scotland
You might want to reword that post a bit. The T word is banned on SV in this context, for understandable reasons, hence the lack of Admiral Ackbar jokes in this story. It's good to know you're enjoying the story, but let's try and keep to the site rules, shall we?
Beyogi
and a fairy
- Pronouns
- She/Her
But getting that as a devil or loyal exorcist might be a bit difficult.