3
Abydos

The King had made a terrible mistake. It wasn't the first time. He was always far too flippant with magic. The old sorcerer's tolls were not toys, he knew, but he couldn't leave them alone. He didn't have the skill to use them safely but that didn't stop his unthinking pride from driving him to try. As reward for his hubris the magic that he tried and failed to control ripped a hole in space and time and dropped him into a desert.

The sun was high overhead and he had neither shelter nor tools to build one. He knew enough about desert survival to know that he needed to find water and shade quickly. He also knew that moving during the day was almost as suicidal as staying in place without any supplies. Still, he had no choice. He picked a direction and started walking.

Hours passed, he knew. The sun was no longer above him but was beginning to receed down towards the horizon. Still he found no sign of civilization, no oasis, not even a cactus or a cave. His body was covered with sweat but his clothes weren't sufficient to retain it. Had he known where events would take him he would have dressed appropriately and he regretted not doing so as he approached dehydration.

He had to survive. His people needed him. He was their King. They needed him.

His vision was becoming blurry and he was no longer sweating, but he continued on. The sun had set and it was beginning to cool.

The sun was rising again. He needed shelter but he didn't even have a shovel . He needed water. He kept walking.

He collapsed but in his mind he continued walking. In his mind he continued walking until he found lake of clean fresh water. If he were human the sun would have killed him then, but he was heartier than that.

In his dreams the King heard a woman calling out a name. " Daniel!"


General Hammon's Office, Stargate Command

"General, he's crazy. He really believes that he's Batman."

"Are you sure that it's not some sort of an act?"

"No one is that good an actor."

"There's still no sign of how he got in here."

"Major Davis tells be that there is no record of him in any database. It's like he just appeared out of thin air."

-------------------

"Unscheduled Offword Activation."

The dial spun, the gate swooshed, and Walter pressed the button that causes the millimeter-thin titanium iris to unfurl one micron in front of the event horizon.

"I'm receiving a video feed from Abydos."

Stargate Command had been working closely with the Abydosians ever since they unburried their gate. Abydos's mines were still Earth's most reliable source of Naquada, making the primitive world a vital strategic partner. Observers and advisers were permanently stationed on the desert world to help the Abydosians develop the infrastructure that they needed and provide them with aid: water filtration, medicine, improved irrigation. The Abydos wouldn't be anywhere near a tenth-century, standard of living any time soon, but it was still a vast improvement over the precious state of affairs.

In exchange, the SGC got the rights to mine Abydos's Naquada and knowledge necessary to safely handle the material. While the Abydosian miners used primitive hand tools and had little understanding of modern equipment and techniques, their experience was invaluable in preventing potentially lethal mistakes.

Walter pressed the button and Daniel Jackson's face appear on the monitor.

"Hi, Daniel," said Jack.

"Hi, Jack. "

"How was your vacation?"

"Pretty good. Sha're and I did a lot of catching up and I think we found a lead on one of Ra's old caches. Aren't you supposed to be fishing?"

"Oh no. Even better. I met Batman."

"Adam West or Michael Keaton?"

"Neither."

"George Cloony?"

"It's a long story. You didn't call just to hear about my vacation."

"No. We found someone lost in the desert and he needs medical attention. I was hoping Doctor Frasier would be available."

"I see."

"The medics here gave him an IV to rehydrate him but he's not human and they have no clue how to treat him."

"Not human you say? Anyone we met before?"

"No. He looks sort of like ... oh you'll never believe me if I just say it."

Daniel Jackson stepped behind the camera and pointed it at a military cot in the corner of the earthen hut. Jack saw the mouselike alien's ears first: big, round, black, unmistakable, trademarked.

"Oh for crying out loud."
 
...seriously, do you people not read the author's posts for rather important details, like the following?
hyzmarca said:
So I'm following a rule. Only one object will be crossing over from per fictional universe. And some of those objects will land in enemy hands.
So, either the GEoM himself is pulled in, or an Imperial Guard/Space Marine warship (with or without a crew, as Ba'al's appropriated Death Star has demonstrated).

On that note: hyzmarca, you really should add the above text to top of the very first story post. Otherwise newcomers to the thread will continue to make false assumptions.

Sure, there'll still be those who do so regardless, but best to cut down the likelihood of said occurrences where and whenever possible.
 
4
Batman considered two possibilities. Either he was in a bizarre alternate reality, something that he knew from experience was possible, or one of his enemies discovered his identity and was attempting to break him, something that he knew from experience was possible. Those weren't the only two possibilities, but they were the most likely and they were the ones that he could potentially survive under his own power.

The cell was plain concrete with a steel door. There was a cot in the corner and a stainless toilet and sink. The guards were professional and alert.

He could shove his shirt into the toilet and force them to move him when it overflowed, but that would have been pointless. His captors never used less than three guards when moving him and one of them was always a significant distance from the others. Ambushing them wasn't possible or reasonable.

The logical and pragmatic thing to do was to play along with this, to observe and learn. If he was in another reality then fighting back would only hurt him in the long term. If this were the work of one of his rogues then observation would show a flaw in the simulation.

The cell door opened and the guards escorted him to a conference room.

-----------------------------------
SCG Infirmary

"You shouldn't try to stand," Dr. Frasier said to her patient. "You nearly died out there. You were lucky that Doctor Jackson found you when he did."

The mouse, who had been attempting to get out of bed, stopped struggling. "Where am I?"

"You're on a planet called Earth. Do you remember your name."

"Mickey. Mickey mouse. I need to get home."

"And where is home?"

"Disney Castle."

"Right now, you need to rest. We won't be able to go anywhere if you don't get your strength back."

--------------------------
Thor's Ship, Hyperspace

"That's Thor's hammer," Major Carter explained to the Asgard.

"I do not remember ever owning such a hammer, Major Carter."

"Not you, the other Thor."

"I was not aware that there were other Thors."

"He's a comic book character. You inspired a lot of Norse myths and those myths inspired a comic book. A lot of comic books, actually. "

"I see."

"In the comic, Thor was cast down from Asgard and stripped of his powers. An enchantment was placed on the hammer so that only the worthy could pick it up. The idea was that Thor would be able to reclaim the hammer once he learned his lesson. He lived as a mortal for years and learned humility. When he found the hammer again he became a superhero."

"I see. We have arrived."

"Already? We've been in hyperspace for less than a minute."

"47 seconds to be precise."

----------------------

SGC Conference Room, Earth

Batman wasn't surprised when a bright white light deposited a human female and a grey alien right in front of him, just startled. Teleportation was an old hat for him, but most teleporters were at least polite enough to warn you first.

"Hiya Thor; Carter," said Jack

"Greetings O'Neill"

"Sir."

With Sam's arrival, all of SG-1 was there, along with Major Davis, General Hammond, and Batman.

"We seem to be having a bit of a problem," said Hammond. "I was hopping that you could shed some light on this situation, Supreme Commander."

"Indeed. " Batman tensed up when the grey alien waved an oblong stone in front of him, but was able to suppress an urge to strike. "It is as I suspected. This person has a dimensional variance of 0.61622942. The Hammer has a similar variance. I suspect Mickey Mouse does, as well."

"What does that mean?" Hammond asked.

"It means, sir," Carter responded, "that they're from alternate realities."

"Indeed," Thor added. "This confirms a hypothesis that the Ancients were never able to prove, inevitable fiction."

Daniel adjusted his glasses. "So what you're saying is that comic books are real."

"Given an infinite number of iterations a random phenomenon will eventually produce intelligible information," Thor explained.

"The Infinite Monkey Engine," Carter blurted out. Everyone starred at her, even Thor. "A infinite monkeys banging at a infinite typewriters will eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare."

"Major Carter is correct," Thor explained. "The Ancients hypothesized that this applied to intelligently directed literature, as well. Quantum variance across an infinite number of possible realities ensures that somewhere there is some work of fiction that is identical to some reality. "

O'Neill interrupted." So we're the monkeys."

"In a manner of speaking, yes." Thor replied.

"Does this mean that somewhere there are people reading about us?" Daniel asked.

Teal'c deadpanned, "I do not believe anyone would find us to be interesting, Daniel Jackson."


"I hate to interrupt," Batman spoke."but do you have any way to get me back to my reality."

Thor paused for a second to contemplate the problem and then spoke earnestly. "No. Even the Ancients were only able to access alternate realities with a variance of less than one one billionth. Returning you home is far beyond the capability of any technology that the Asgard are aware of. I'm sorry, but I have urgent matters to attend to. " Then he vanished in a beam of white light.
 
edukated said:
Thor always had such a good bedside manner,
Well he is certainly no Gregory House ... And now I want House at the SGC, as he'd likely be good for the medical craziness that comes through the 'gate.
 
Thor is fighting an intergalactic war against enemies that can think faster than any biological mind, that can reproduce exponentially, and have FTL drives that can cross a galaxy in seconds.

Considering what the replicators are capable of, the only reason why the whole conflict doesn't make th ARM-CORE war look like a schoolyard tussle is that Thor and his fleet are flying around multiple galaxies and constantly destroying replicator concentrations whereever they appear. Considering the sheer size, scale, and speed of the war he has to fight, it's no wonder that he doesn't have time for chit-chat.
 
And that's Ladies and Gentlemen how one should write the Batman.
Ramenth said:
... Why? House is a diagnostician. He's great at figuring out what a disease is. Not at treating things no one has ever heard of.
House is to put it bluntly, fucking brilliant at processing the data he is given. While he might not have heard of some of the diseases, if they work on humans (or close-humans), he might at least get the research going in the right direction.

Besides, he wouldn't be bored that way, as it is something NEW, even to him.
 
House is also a realistic character who supposedly exists in a realistic non-scifi world (one where New Jersey is a uninhabitable death zone filled with all sorts of exotic diseases, so just like the real world).

So far additions have come from comic books, video games, and motion picture sci-fi.

Mjolinir, Batman, Link, Micky Mouse, the freaking Death Star, House. One of those does not belong.
 
hyzmarca said:
House is also a realistic character who supposedly exists in a realistic non-scifi world (one where New Jersey is a uninhabitable death zone filled with all sorts of exotic diseases, so just like the real world).

So far additions have come from comic books, video games, and motion picture sci-fi.

Mjolinir, Batman, Link, Micky Mouse, the freaking Death Star, House. One of those does not belong.
Okay, so House is out. But seeing as its the 50th anniversary of the longest running TV Science Fiction shows ...
 
Daemon really doesn't fit into the theme or tone I'm going for here. I mean, setting up shitty anarcho-capitalist societies on Earth isn't much of an issue when there are giant space fleets that want to bomb the planet back to the stone age.

It's also just a computer program with no personality, just a set of pre-programmed instructions. That doesn't fit into a world of hammy over-the-top villains. I mean, he has no arms, which is a plus, but that's because he has no body, so that's a net negative.
 
Kalaong said:
Maybe it's the whole Thor/Loki equivallence that put me on it; a sociopathic cyborg computer hacker armed with laser gauntlets, semi-intelligent machete-wielding motorcycles, driving a bulletproof sports car and
backed up by an AI Nazi Oberstleutenant? He's essentially what half of Spacebattles would give their left testicle to become.
And have the other half want to kill it with fire. As having a Nazi AI on your side is not a good thing, I could go through all the standard reasons why, but I'll use an obscure one instead that is rather personal to my own issues. The Nazi's killed over two hundred thousand people with mental health problems as well as there other well documented crimes.

So No, Just No.
 
Kalaong said:
I'd be in your half. But I was just pointing out that if hyzmarca wanted a "hammy over-the-top villain", Daemon had an awesome one.
Stargate has enough Ham to make the Ham Business unprofitable for a thousand years, give me one Goa'uld that does not like Hamming it up.
 
SwiftRosenthal said:
He talks in Gou'ald tones, that counts as hamming it up, and I can see him Hamming it up for fun in the safety of his own empire to get back to his roots.
 
Season 6 Ba'al and Season 9 Ba'al are two different beasts. He doesn't really mellow out all that much until he spends some time on Earth and finds out just what he had been missing all those centuries.
 
I wonder if this was it, or if further fictional characters will appear. I totally want to see Harry Potter :)

Thank you for writing this captivating story,
Beyogi
 
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