[x] Do you have any embarassing stories about Fincher?
"Do you have any embarassing stories about Fincher?"
ROOSTER: "Oh, wow, yeah. Do you really want to hear that stuff?"
"I really want to hear that stuff, I really do."
ROOSTER: "Well, okay then! Let's see. When we were, uh, fifteen, sixteen? She tried to escape the Stair by climbing down the storm overflow drain, which leads straight to a wetland at the foot of the mountain. She made a big thing about it, planned everything out, wrote out maps, got supplies ready for going cross country at night, managed to get some scrip together to bribe a captain her dad used to know in Riven Quay. She was really going to try to go the whole six hundred miles on foot over the mountains and escape overseas."
"She got picked up on the road, right?"
ROOSTER: "Nah, that wouldn't be a very embarassing story, that happens to lots of us. What happened was, she said her goodbyes, and I thought I might have seen the last of her. Then late at night I heard a banging on the pipes."
"From her climbing down the drain?"
ROOSTER: "Well, if the plan had gone well, she should have been already on the road, and the banging was a secret sequence we kept to ourselves for danger. I got up to check it out. Luckily there wasn't anyone around. I'm not very stealthy."
STEALTH: I can confirm that Rooster is not very stealthy.
ROOSTER: "Anyway, it took me a while to figure out that the banging wasn't actually coming from the drain. See, it was dark when she set out, and a lot of the pipe entry panels are in the same maintenance room.
"So where was she?"
ROOSTER: "Sewage pipe."
"Oh, ew."
ROOSTER: "Yeah, well, the sewage pipe was actually a lot narrower than the storm overflow, but she still managed to get almost halfway down before getting herself properly stuck. If the pipes hadn't connected to the one that goes under our dorm, I might have never heard her banging at it."
"So how did she get out?"
ROOSTER: "Well, there was no way to pull her back up, and no way to get her further down, so in the end I just removed the entire section of pipe and took it out to the yard. Managed to split it in half with a pickaxe without hurting her. She was
not happy. Like... imagine the most offended wet cat you ever seen, and it's also poisonous."
"Wait, you did all that without getting caught?"
ROOSTER: "Yeah, that's the worst thing. They don't really
guard the Stair very well. Most of the security against escapees comes from having retired legion veterans running the farm villas in the valleys for hundreds of miles around."
A vision of a burning valley in the darkness flashes in your minds eye, and is gone.
ROOSTER: "So yeah, Fincher could probably just have used the actual stairs."
"What happened after that?"
ROOSTER: "Well, there was, you know, a lot of mess, as you can imagine. The busted pipe was still leaking and flooding the area. We managed to get cleaned up and back to our bunks before morning, but they still figured out it was us. Our fang spent the next month cleaning up the mess on punishment duty."
"Well, thanks, that definitely qualifies as an embarassing story."
ROOSTER: "No problem! Oh!" he suddenly looks horrified. "I shouldn't have told you any of that! She told me not to tell anyone."
"Don't worry about it, Rooster, I'll keep it to myself."
ROOSTER: "Oh, thanks! Anyway, did you need anything else?"
[ ] Why did you want to escape from the Stair? Isn't it a school?
[ ] When did I kick you in the face?
[ ] The Paleans need more arbalests.
[ ] You're a smith? Can you make something cool for me?
[ ] How did you get so big?
[ ] I need to get Dragonlord Mei to like me.