Get Away From Brockton Bay! "Tinker of Fiction" SI

[Rini]

I almost expected him to suggest that Taylor take the other batch of the potion. She is not a brute and her spider silk suit will only be able to protect her so much, it would be greatly increased if she herself was stronger.
As to the Nazis, I'm sure that there are many ways that they could get rid of those problems without it being noticed. Just having Taylor's bugs move some of his potions into Krieg's office/home and burn it to the ground, plant evidence, spy on them, the list of things are endless and Taylor could be blocks away. Having their cars/trucks/etc. develop problems with hoses being damaged, mud being moved into the intakes, all without leaving a single insect behind to give a clue, it would bleed them dry. This is all before the big guns are brought in, because they can drop a lot more on them by surprise.

 

[shypunk]

well if i was the MC i woulda been a lil to impulsive might of beat the shit outa that nazi fuck

 

[NIghtmareNursery]

I feel there needs to be some kind of Powerpuff Girls joke if Taylor is really going for the 3 identities route.
With SI being the Professor

 

[Mouse197]

I really like the concept of this story, and this chapter is a fun read. Though it felt like the dialouge was stiff? Stilted? Robotic? Something like that. I'm not a writer myself so I don't really know how to describe it other than saying it sounded weird. Anyway, thanks for the chapter. I look forward to future updates.

Click to shrink...

Yeah.....at times it feels like SI is describing a conversation instead of being apart of one.

 

[Kejmur]

well if i was the MC i woulda been a lil to impulsive might of beat the shit outa that nazi fuck

Click to shrink...

He was tempted. There is even a line, where he wanted to pick up a desk, and use it to shove Krieg outside through a window. But it wouldn't be a good idea for now.

And Krieg is one of the worst matchups now. His ability to manipulate kinetic energy is a bitch to deal for hand-to-hand combatant, as he can easily take momentum from your punches, kicks, etc.

I feel there needs to be some kind of Powerpuff Girls joke if Taylor is really going for the 3 identities route.
With SI being the Professor

Click to shrink...

I admit. This is tempting as hell, as Earth-Aleph thing of sort. I'm from the generation of Dexter's Laboratory, Powerpuff Girls, Johny Bravo, etc.

IMO best Cartoon Network generation of them all, and I lived through it as a kid.

Man, at one point I need to write that Mojo Jojo enters Worm crossover. And Deidara. Too little time, too many ideas.

Yeah.....at times it feels like SI is describing a conversation instead of being apart of one.

Click to shrink...

I admit this is a bit of a stylistic choice. Sometimes I experiment a bit with writing, and some changes do happen.

As I said - I'm a beginner. I still figure out how I want to present, write and plan some things. I have the plotline planned, but some things I still 'wing it' in a way.

Anyway this is first, and foremost writing practice. If people like it, great. If not, a bit sad, but it's first, and foremost writing exercise.

I just hope it doesn't push you or anything. If in the end you decide to move on... It's a shame, but in the end your choice. In this case good luck.

 

[Beast II]

And how creepy some self inserts could be with how hard they tried to 'befriend' the main protagonist disturbed me greatly. Especially when over 20 years old guys insisted on getting into a friendship zone with a 15 years old. Come on, ridiculous.

Click to shrink...

THANK YOU! It really bugs me sometimes just how utterly ridiculous it is.

 

[Hydralisk]

THANK YOU! It really bugs me sometimes just how utterly ridiculous it is.

Click to shrink...

There are many who overdo it, true. That said I don't think trying to make friends with them is such a bad thing as long as its done realisticly. The typical way of knowing everything about them and then casualy just wining them over because reasons is what bothers me personaly with those.

 

[Kejmur]

There are many who overdo it, true. That said I don't think trying to make friends with them is such a bad thing as long as its done realisticly. The typical way of knowing everything about them and then casualy just wining them over because reasons is what bothers me personaly with those.

Click to shrink...

Also thing with Taylor is that she should be REALLY hard to win over. She was betrayed by her best friend. She can't trust people anymore really, although she is desperate for some positive contact as well, so it's still doable. But also I think in some SI stories she too easily allows some people to take control (which was a BIG thing with this character), and in the end it's rolled over with, which I found odd or not very in character. Anyone approaching her friendly from the get go should be met with suspicion, or hostility. Although in some stories I also see her as very shy, and awkward, if scene is presented right, and it may work if it's some accidental stranger meeting, that doesn't push anything here. Just a random talk, with no promises or anything, as that whole bullying also turned her into a pretty introverted person for obvious reasons.

In other words, I would say it's doable, but it should be complicated.

In this story I plan to keep this distance. To always be something off here. Helping her doesn't hurt, and MC isn't a complete asshole, so nice gesture here and there may always show up, but lots of reasoning here is very selfish. Title is pretty obvious it will happen, and this won't change. Honestly Taylor's reaction here may be... compared to betrayal, and we know how Taylor deals with it.

 

[Mouse197]

He was tempted. There is even a line, where he wanted to pick up a desk, and use it to shove Krieg outside through a window. But it wouldn't be a good idea for now.

And Krieg is one of the worst matchups now. His ability to manipulate kinetic energy is a bitch to deal for hand-to-hand combatant, as he can easily take momentum from your punches, kicks, etc.



I admit. This is tempting as hell, as Earth-Aleph thing of sort. I'm from the generation of Dexter's Laboratory, Powerpuff Girls, Johny Bravo, etc.

IMO best Cartoon Network generation of them all, and I lived through it as a kid.

Man, at one point I need to write that Mojo Jojo enters Worm crossover. And Deidara. Too little time, too many ideas.



I admit this is a bit of a stylistic choice. Sometimes I experiment a bit with writing, and some changes do happen.

As I said - I'm a beginner. I still figure out how I want to present, write and plan some things. I have the plotline planned, but some things I still 'wing it' in a way.

Anyway this is first, and foremost writing practice. If people like it, great. If not, a bit sad, but it's first, and foremost writing exercise.

I just hope it doesn't push you or anything. If in the end you decide to move on... It's a shame, but in the end your choice. In this case good luck.

Click to shrink...

Im not gonna push you away.......just write however you want to write and most important HAVE FUN

 

[CrossHope]

So I was wondering, since Krieg is a kinetic manipulator or whatever and you can't hit him easily, can you choke him out or use joint locks?

 

[Kejmur]

So I was wondering, since Krieg is a kinetic manipulator or whatever and you can't hit him easily, can you choke him out or use joint locks?

Click to shrink...

I don't think so. The closer you are to him, the better his power works. Near choking him is pretty much his power at its strongest. I suspect it would nearly stop or hands in this case 'slip' up around his neck. Joint lock I suspect would end up the same. I can't say for sure, as I don't remember any example where something like this happen to him.

He is also classified as a Brute. In canon he was strong enough to put Manpower through a wall, while make him fly before it happens. Also it's mentioned that kinetic energy manipulation may even make you struggle to breathe (as there is some movement of muscles involved here) and he resists Master effects, although how this works? Shrug?

I think best way is to simply attack him from the range, and with a surprise factored in. Also the best way is to use different type of energy to counter him - heat (like from explosion so you burn him), energy based attacks or heavy cold, as his power is focused on kinetic energy manipulation. Physical attacks are the worst approach against this guy.

 

[Aconitum]

Poison could also work well.

 

[PrinceOfDoom]

Using Gaulish Magic Potion with a Tinker of Fiction was rather a stroke of genius there! Awesome choice! And heh... I have to wonder if Taylor will be the Asterix to his Obelix.

Still, that was exceedingly well done. I can only suggest grabbing yourself a Beta. Other then that, keep up the awesome work! Looking forward to reading more of this!