Act 5, Scene 2
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Act 5, Scene 2: Lying for Peace! Practice, Practice, Practice!
"The tavern's that way," the man said, leaning in a little bit. He was all angles, all skin and bones, all knots and tensions. He was, in other words, as old as the sand itself, and looking at her as if she were a threat. Suzuhisa Shizue, currently in the form of a female traveler in her twenties, frowned.
"Oh, there's not a… community center, or--"
"Tavern, and there's a shrine out there at the 'skirts."
Shizue smiled, politely. "Thanks for answering. Sorry if I came across as ignorant."
"You're a city-slicker, it's just how you be," the old man said, with a snort.
"No, more of a town girl."
"Out here, a town might as well be a city," the old man admitted with a slow, doubtful shake of his head, as if he realizes Shizue was lying. He'd better not, she thought, because she wasn't sure if she was ready to fail a mission already.
"I guess so," she said. "What do you do for entertainment around here?"
"Oh, hear there's a bunch of players comin' round. I just hope it's funny. We don't need no tragedies. The sake the tavern has is tragedy enough."
"Bad?"
The old man spat. "Missy-chan, you haven't had sake if you've had the stuff at the tavern. Take it from me."
Shizue, for a moment, imagined directing Emiko to the tavern, just to see how she reacted.
It probably wouldn't be appreciated, though.
Unfortunately.
[Opening Credits]
Shizue learned something she hadn't expected to learn. Simply put, she'd honestly forgotten how to interact with civilians outside of the kinds of tricks and masks of the spy. It was fine, because she was in fact a spy, collecting information on what the people liked, the better to not give themselves away.
But everything felt studied, at least a little bit, in a way that she couldn't understand. She'd interacted fine with civilians before as a shinobi, both under cover and openly. She'd successfully pretended to be just some other civilian for missions. But now, when she didn't have a background so much as a vague disguise that was meant to be her, but grown up… yet completely different, she didn't know how to interact with them. You can't talk about jutsu, obviously, and politics? Well, they didn't care, and didn't get it either. There wasn't the instant connection she had with plenty of other shinobi, positive and negative, and sometimes both at once.
Everything felt as if she were playing a role, even when she was talking to people and being, other than a change in voices, herself.
She swore she understood how they operated more now than she had before, and yet that didn't stop the feeling of distance she experienced towards the average villager. She sat in the tavern, and told jokes Akachi had told her, and wondered if one day she'd have a list of them, ready to deploy. It was a wonder Maki didn't feel lost, doing this. It was a terrible way to make personal connections, since of course everything was a lie.
She bit her lip, aware that she was making herself miserable when she was supposed to be listening. Shizue's own taste in plays was rather limited, but when she'd asked about stories they liked, she learned that Emiko would probably have to simplify it even more, or keep it just as complex but add a few more jokes about bodily functions. Also, religion was apparently important in the area, but she couldn't say to save her life whether that meant they should include it, or absolutely not include it because it'd hurt more to get it wrong.
And--
"Want another drink?" a man asked, and slid in next to her. He had a large nose, and soft, gentle eyes, but a rough, even tragic, face.
"Not… particularly."
Shizue had gotten by by looking around the dingy bar and, when nobody was looking, spilling some of it on the ground. In all, she'd had two very, very small sips of it, as in, a few drops each might have passed her lips. It tasted absolutely disgusting. All alochol did, but this was even worse. Could sake be rotten?
Shizue didn't know, and she smirked a little and looked over at him.
"Oh, w-well, I don't want any either, then. Can I sit here?"
"It's hardly a free country," Shizue said. "But I suppose so." They were seated at the long, long bench before the bar, and it was starting to get more crowded.
"Well, so, what are you doing here? Up to anything fun?" the man asked. "I was kinda surprised when you were gone."
Shizue blinked, her heart skipping a beat. "Okiie?" she whispered.
"Yeah, sorry I didn't tell you," Okiie said, rubbing his nose in embarrassment.
"You didn't exactly hide it well," she said, quietly, pretty sure by this point that nobody was listening. Besides, she wasn't planning on mentioning anything. "A new haircut's not going to make me forget you're the man I know."
Okiie got that she was giving them cover. "Well, I tried. And, does it not look fine?"
"Oh, your hair is nice," Shizue said. That's all, truly: nice. But she did like running her fingers through it to make it even more mussed, when they were panting between kissing sessions. So that was something.
"Yours is amazing," Okiie said. "But I didn't come here to flirt. I came to ask you to come with me. There's… news."
"Oh," Shizue said. "I think I've gotten enough here. But, uh." Shizue said, quietly. "I think we could set up near the shrine if we did it right."
"I'm sure we'll, uh, all be glad."
He was talking like a spy out of some movie, and it was adorable. He was trying so hard to be vague.
"Yep," Shizue said, almost smacking her lips as she said it, imitating a bit of a rural Wind accent. "I think this is the start of a lovely friendship."
******
As soon as they were out of range, Okiie looked around. "There's, uh. Three Rainbow Jonin on a mission here. Emiko-sensei managed to get that out of someone. Uh, nearby. Who has been relocated."
"Someone?" Shizue asked, in a low voice.
"They were apparently after a Jonin-level Missing-Nin. He was seen in the area, and I think he's murdered people before. Civilians, I mean, when it wasn't the job. He murdered someone high profile enough to… offer a mission, I think?" Okiie scratched his head. "And so Emiko-sensei went and talked to him. I dunno what happened, but I guess he, uh, can't have been so bad if they were able to be amiable."
Shizue was reminded suddenly, almost painfully, of when two S-ranked criminals who turned out to be from a dangerous organization showed up and shoved their way into Emiko's base. "And what is he doing?"
"Uh, uhm, Emiko-sensei said that he'd agreed to not get anywhere within two-hundred miles of her or else, uh. Starting now? Which seemed rather rude, but he agreed to it, apparently, so!" Okiie laughed a little nervously.
"Were you there?"
"Well, I went to see what she was up to. She was smiling a lot, and so was he, so I think maybe I was imagining it," Okiie said.
"Do you really think you were, or are you trying to be positive?" Shizue asked, with amusement.
"Okay, yes. I'm pretty sure she threatened him. But he probably deserved it, and I'd like to think that nobody actually got hurt. But she's excited, because she can lay a trail saying that, uh."
They reached the outskirts of the caravan, and switched forms with transformation, thus ending the artiste's nature walk.
But she had a lowly stagehand to talk to, as soon as she could.
*******
"An idiot who barely made it to Jonin. I knew of him. Iwa. He tried, according to his blubbering, to sell information to the Raikage about their potential enemy, the Tsuchikage. Except, right in the middle of the process, the Tsuchikage changed, and suddenly the Raikage was protesting in loud private ways that, of course, he had nothing to do with it, and he'd immediately turned them in. So, he and the other idiots got blamed. Round of internal trials and everything, but he got away by sheer luck, saw the writing on the wall while deployed on a nothing mission south of the border."
Suzuhisa Shizue had seen someone looking that self-satisfied, but only because she had seen both cats and Emiko in similar moods before. Without those two experiences, it would be unique, the smirk on Emiko's face.
"Apparently there's even more internal dissent to the Tsuchikage's alliance than I thought," Emiko said. "It means that we might have a chance to cause internal dissent, if she's not willing to see wisdom. And, let me tell you, I may seem as if I am modestly and humbly accepting this good news, but I'm actually secretly pleased on the inside." She said it as dry as dust, so dry that Shizue couldn't help but grin. "Plus, they're after him, right? So, I swept out his cave, but left a few hints that he has a mission killing someone in the area, say, in a traveling caravan."
"Oh," Shizue gaped.
"Yes. But I've put in hints that should make them suspicious. We meet with them, covertly, and then from there we'll have a line in for the Oyabun. We'll have to keep up the pretense of the plays, and we need to get this perfect, but make some single mistake somewhere. But a telling one, meant to be seen as intentional. That means that you need to be careful. If you don't, they'll catch on and reject us and it'll start a downward spiral and then war will be inevitable."
Shizue stared, wide-eyed. "What? It will?"
"No, of course not," Emiko said, with a soft smile. "If we miss this, we'll just have to be more blatant later, or we keep on going. But I know you want to make people run through the play anyways."
"Want to? Emiko-sensei, I just--"
"Just?" Emiko leaned back slightly. "Our time is through, you've spent enough time berating me for failing to fully capture your lovely vision. I must go, to be unappreciated and slowly resentful somewhere else."
And with that, she was gone.
Well.
No pressure indeed.
*******
"Really?" Junko asked, with a roll of her eyes. "Really really?"
"All three of you need to do better. The soldiers should seem crisp but out of practice. Like they read about discipline in a very good book, but one they only read once," Shizue said. ;"Okiie-kun was much better."
"We don't even have any lines," Seiichiro pointed out. But at least he was whining in a way that made it clear that he'd love to act.
Saya should have been trouble. But she wasn't. Apparently the role she was playing respected, in an abstract sense, the idea of the artiste's vision.
"Stop complaining!" the Backer, that was to say Maki, said. "If you want to pay for your mistakes in ryu, then you can, dears."
"Fine," Junko groaned. "I'll do it, I'll do it. But I want to act one day! I have potential!" She raised her hand to her (currently male) face in despair. "Why else would I be here?"
Shizue shrugged and said, "Next scene."
******
"But what is there but to love and laugh, my darling? What is there?" Saya asked, with a laugh. "You are handsome, in a hapless sort of way, and who can deal with the haplessly handsome. They don't even know it, and they act like such simpletons, but what can be simple about a pretty face?" She winked winsomely for the audience. "After all, I have a pretty face and I am quite complex, dear. I have many faces, as it were."
It was, in other words, a role--that of the civilized princess who turned out to be scheming evil things but was in love with the Captain, as opposed to the barbarian princess who was actually nice, but wasn't in love with the Captain (because she'd just met him, after all)--perfectly fitted for Saya.
The scene where she tried to poison the barbarian princess was… well.
Shizue thought about her first meeting with Saya and shuddered. Had she told Emiko about it?
"I, well, I guess if you're a princess you must know, but I don't really see it. Also, where do you keep your other faces?" the guard Captain asked.
"In my makeup bag."
A pause for laughter.
"May I see?"
"My other faces? Only if you…"
Shizue shook her head.
Things were on schedule, and one of the phrases had been planted, apparently. Shizue didn't know which one it was, but…
[Commercial Break]
By all accounts, while everyone was a little run down, the play was already a success. There were hundreds, both from the village and from surrounding villages, that had gathered outside the shrine as the shinobi (that was to say Ginchiyo's team) did double-duty by going through all the heavy lifting to make the stage with its five different backgrounds that were moved in and out, and the long, circular front part, the wings, the curtains, there were a thousand things about the stage that could have gone wrong. They all, each and every one of them, went perfectly.
The play, too, could have gone wrong so many ways, and yet they had said their lines… if not perfectly, than without a single flaw, a single real mistake. There was a huge crowd of people outside, and there were many picnic blankets to be seen, people taking the day off, the only day off in the week, to see them perform. A few of them even had umbrellas, and so they got to eat in the shade. Others stood at the back, like tall stalks of grass that hadn't yet been cut down by the scythe.
The remarks the elegant cruel princess made were quite… cutting.
The audience got the point immediately, that the play was about the war, and about different, clashing cultures. Emiko hadn't used a knife, she'd used a sledgehammer, and because of that, well. Because of that…
Shizue looked down at the knife which was currently invading her every thought by its presence. It was a very normal sort of kunai, but the man holding it was anything but normal. Dark eyed, but with bright red hair, he was dressed as any play-goer, in a simple blue kimono, but there was a sort of tension about his body, as if he were about to spring on her and devour her whole. It was startling, and more than that, so terrifying that she couldn't breathe. But she had to breathe.
"What are the Kazekage's dogs even doing here? You clearly wanted to meet with me, unless you're an innocent dupe. Are you? Either way, I'm pretty sure those were Suna ANBU signs you weaved into that play of yours," he growled. "So, talk. Now."
Play the character, play the character! (Choose 1)
[] Admit to the possibility of maybe, potentially, being someone who might have some relations to the Suna ANBU, but who has a message for someone more "weighty" than a Jonin.
[] Tease him, specifically about assuming that the man who was the 'artiste' was the one in charge of any such team. Specifically, carefully beard him as to the nature of this team, and its extent.
[] Order him, in a playful, joking, and deadly serious manner, to leave now, and to bring word to the Oyabun of his suspicions, and the schedule of the play company, and the desire to, perhaps, speak.
[] Deny it entirely, pretending to be a dim patsy of some type, in order to stall for backup which will no doubt be coming if there is enough time, seeing as the second-to-last act will be ending in a few minutes.
[] Write-in.
*******
A/N: I'm sorry this is short! But I do hope you enjoyed it.
"The tavern's that way," the man said, leaning in a little bit. He was all angles, all skin and bones, all knots and tensions. He was, in other words, as old as the sand itself, and looking at her as if she were a threat. Suzuhisa Shizue, currently in the form of a female traveler in her twenties, frowned.
"Oh, there's not a… community center, or--"
"Tavern, and there's a shrine out there at the 'skirts."
Shizue smiled, politely. "Thanks for answering. Sorry if I came across as ignorant."
"You're a city-slicker, it's just how you be," the old man said, with a snort.
"No, more of a town girl."
"Out here, a town might as well be a city," the old man admitted with a slow, doubtful shake of his head, as if he realizes Shizue was lying. He'd better not, she thought, because she wasn't sure if she was ready to fail a mission already.
"I guess so," she said. "What do you do for entertainment around here?"
"Oh, hear there's a bunch of players comin' round. I just hope it's funny. We don't need no tragedies. The sake the tavern has is tragedy enough."
"Bad?"
The old man spat. "Missy-chan, you haven't had sake if you've had the stuff at the tavern. Take it from me."
Shizue, for a moment, imagined directing Emiko to the tavern, just to see how she reacted.
It probably wouldn't be appreciated, though.
Unfortunately.
[Opening Credits]
Shizue learned something she hadn't expected to learn. Simply put, she'd honestly forgotten how to interact with civilians outside of the kinds of tricks and masks of the spy. It was fine, because she was in fact a spy, collecting information on what the people liked, the better to not give themselves away.
But everything felt studied, at least a little bit, in a way that she couldn't understand. She'd interacted fine with civilians before as a shinobi, both under cover and openly. She'd successfully pretended to be just some other civilian for missions. But now, when she didn't have a background so much as a vague disguise that was meant to be her, but grown up… yet completely different, she didn't know how to interact with them. You can't talk about jutsu, obviously, and politics? Well, they didn't care, and didn't get it either. There wasn't the instant connection she had with plenty of other shinobi, positive and negative, and sometimes both at once.
Everything felt as if she were playing a role, even when she was talking to people and being, other than a change in voices, herself.
She swore she understood how they operated more now than she had before, and yet that didn't stop the feeling of distance she experienced towards the average villager. She sat in the tavern, and told jokes Akachi had told her, and wondered if one day she'd have a list of them, ready to deploy. It was a wonder Maki didn't feel lost, doing this. It was a terrible way to make personal connections, since of course everything was a lie.
She bit her lip, aware that she was making herself miserable when she was supposed to be listening. Shizue's own taste in plays was rather limited, but when she'd asked about stories they liked, she learned that Emiko would probably have to simplify it even more, or keep it just as complex but add a few more jokes about bodily functions. Also, religion was apparently important in the area, but she couldn't say to save her life whether that meant they should include it, or absolutely not include it because it'd hurt more to get it wrong.
And--
"Want another drink?" a man asked, and slid in next to her. He had a large nose, and soft, gentle eyes, but a rough, even tragic, face.
"Not… particularly."
Shizue had gotten by by looking around the dingy bar and, when nobody was looking, spilling some of it on the ground. In all, she'd had two very, very small sips of it, as in, a few drops each might have passed her lips. It tasted absolutely disgusting. All alochol did, but this was even worse. Could sake be rotten?
Shizue didn't know, and she smirked a little and looked over at him.
"Oh, w-well, I don't want any either, then. Can I sit here?"
"It's hardly a free country," Shizue said. "But I suppose so." They were seated at the long, long bench before the bar, and it was starting to get more crowded.
"Well, so, what are you doing here? Up to anything fun?" the man asked. "I was kinda surprised when you were gone."
Shizue blinked, her heart skipping a beat. "Okiie?" she whispered.
"Yeah, sorry I didn't tell you," Okiie said, rubbing his nose in embarrassment.
"You didn't exactly hide it well," she said, quietly, pretty sure by this point that nobody was listening. Besides, she wasn't planning on mentioning anything. "A new haircut's not going to make me forget you're the man I know."
Okiie got that she was giving them cover. "Well, I tried. And, does it not look fine?"
"Oh, your hair is nice," Shizue said. That's all, truly: nice. But she did like running her fingers through it to make it even more mussed, when they were panting between kissing sessions. So that was something.
"Yours is amazing," Okiie said. "But I didn't come here to flirt. I came to ask you to come with me. There's… news."
"Oh," Shizue said. "I think I've gotten enough here. But, uh." Shizue said, quietly. "I think we could set up near the shrine if we did it right."
"I'm sure we'll, uh, all be glad."
He was talking like a spy out of some movie, and it was adorable. He was trying so hard to be vague.
"Yep," Shizue said, almost smacking her lips as she said it, imitating a bit of a rural Wind accent. "I think this is the start of a lovely friendship."
******
As soon as they were out of range, Okiie looked around. "There's, uh. Three Rainbow Jonin on a mission here. Emiko-sensei managed to get that out of someone. Uh, nearby. Who has been relocated."
"Someone?" Shizue asked, in a low voice.
"They were apparently after a Jonin-level Missing-Nin. He was seen in the area, and I think he's murdered people before. Civilians, I mean, when it wasn't the job. He murdered someone high profile enough to… offer a mission, I think?" Okiie scratched his head. "And so Emiko-sensei went and talked to him. I dunno what happened, but I guess he, uh, can't have been so bad if they were able to be amiable."
Shizue was reminded suddenly, almost painfully, of when two S-ranked criminals who turned out to be from a dangerous organization showed up and shoved their way into Emiko's base. "And what is he doing?"
"Uh, uhm, Emiko-sensei said that he'd agreed to not get anywhere within two-hundred miles of her or else, uh. Starting now? Which seemed rather rude, but he agreed to it, apparently, so!" Okiie laughed a little nervously.
"Were you there?"
"Well, I went to see what she was up to. She was smiling a lot, and so was he, so I think maybe I was imagining it," Okiie said.
"Do you really think you were, or are you trying to be positive?" Shizue asked, with amusement.
"Okay, yes. I'm pretty sure she threatened him. But he probably deserved it, and I'd like to think that nobody actually got hurt. But she's excited, because she can lay a trail saying that, uh."
They reached the outskirts of the caravan, and switched forms with transformation, thus ending the artiste's nature walk.
But she had a lowly stagehand to talk to, as soon as she could.
*******
"An idiot who barely made it to Jonin. I knew of him. Iwa. He tried, according to his blubbering, to sell information to the Raikage about their potential enemy, the Tsuchikage. Except, right in the middle of the process, the Tsuchikage changed, and suddenly the Raikage was protesting in loud private ways that, of course, he had nothing to do with it, and he'd immediately turned them in. So, he and the other idiots got blamed. Round of internal trials and everything, but he got away by sheer luck, saw the writing on the wall while deployed on a nothing mission south of the border."
Suzuhisa Shizue had seen someone looking that self-satisfied, but only because she had seen both cats and Emiko in similar moods before. Without those two experiences, it would be unique, the smirk on Emiko's face.
"Apparently there's even more internal dissent to the Tsuchikage's alliance than I thought," Emiko said. "It means that we might have a chance to cause internal dissent, if she's not willing to see wisdom. And, let me tell you, I may seem as if I am modestly and humbly accepting this good news, but I'm actually secretly pleased on the inside." She said it as dry as dust, so dry that Shizue couldn't help but grin. "Plus, they're after him, right? So, I swept out his cave, but left a few hints that he has a mission killing someone in the area, say, in a traveling caravan."
"Oh," Shizue gaped.
"Yes. But I've put in hints that should make them suspicious. We meet with them, covertly, and then from there we'll have a line in for the Oyabun. We'll have to keep up the pretense of the plays, and we need to get this perfect, but make some single mistake somewhere. But a telling one, meant to be seen as intentional. That means that you need to be careful. If you don't, they'll catch on and reject us and it'll start a downward spiral and then war will be inevitable."
Shizue stared, wide-eyed. "What? It will?"
"No, of course not," Emiko said, with a soft smile. "If we miss this, we'll just have to be more blatant later, or we keep on going. But I know you want to make people run through the play anyways."
"Want to? Emiko-sensei, I just--"
"Just?" Emiko leaned back slightly. "Our time is through, you've spent enough time berating me for failing to fully capture your lovely vision. I must go, to be unappreciated and slowly resentful somewhere else."
And with that, she was gone.
Well.
No pressure indeed.
*******
"Really?" Junko asked, with a roll of her eyes. "Really really?"
"All three of you need to do better. The soldiers should seem crisp but out of practice. Like they read about discipline in a very good book, but one they only read once," Shizue said. ;"Okiie-kun was much better."
"We don't even have any lines," Seiichiro pointed out. But at least he was whining in a way that made it clear that he'd love to act.
Saya should have been trouble. But she wasn't. Apparently the role she was playing respected, in an abstract sense, the idea of the artiste's vision.
"Stop complaining!" the Backer, that was to say Maki, said. "If you want to pay for your mistakes in ryu, then you can, dears."
"Fine," Junko groaned. "I'll do it, I'll do it. But I want to act one day! I have potential!" She raised her hand to her (currently male) face in despair. "Why else would I be here?"
Shizue shrugged and said, "Next scene."
******
"But what is there but to love and laugh, my darling? What is there?" Saya asked, with a laugh. "You are handsome, in a hapless sort of way, and who can deal with the haplessly handsome. They don't even know it, and they act like such simpletons, but what can be simple about a pretty face?" She winked winsomely for the audience. "After all, I have a pretty face and I am quite complex, dear. I have many faces, as it were."
It was, in other words, a role--that of the civilized princess who turned out to be scheming evil things but was in love with the Captain, as opposed to the barbarian princess who was actually nice, but wasn't in love with the Captain (because she'd just met him, after all)--perfectly fitted for Saya.
The scene where she tried to poison the barbarian princess was… well.
Shizue thought about her first meeting with Saya and shuddered. Had she told Emiko about it?
"I, well, I guess if you're a princess you must know, but I don't really see it. Also, where do you keep your other faces?" the guard Captain asked.
"In my makeup bag."
A pause for laughter.
"May I see?"
"My other faces? Only if you…"
Shizue shook her head.
Things were on schedule, and one of the phrases had been planted, apparently. Shizue didn't know which one it was, but…
[Commercial Break]
By all accounts, while everyone was a little run down, the play was already a success. There were hundreds, both from the village and from surrounding villages, that had gathered outside the shrine as the shinobi (that was to say Ginchiyo's team) did double-duty by going through all the heavy lifting to make the stage with its five different backgrounds that were moved in and out, and the long, circular front part, the wings, the curtains, there were a thousand things about the stage that could have gone wrong. They all, each and every one of them, went perfectly.
The play, too, could have gone wrong so many ways, and yet they had said their lines… if not perfectly, than without a single flaw, a single real mistake. There was a huge crowd of people outside, and there were many picnic blankets to be seen, people taking the day off, the only day off in the week, to see them perform. A few of them even had umbrellas, and so they got to eat in the shade. Others stood at the back, like tall stalks of grass that hadn't yet been cut down by the scythe.
The remarks the elegant cruel princess made were quite… cutting.
The audience got the point immediately, that the play was about the war, and about different, clashing cultures. Emiko hadn't used a knife, she'd used a sledgehammer, and because of that, well. Because of that…
Shizue looked down at the knife which was currently invading her every thought by its presence. It was a very normal sort of kunai, but the man holding it was anything but normal. Dark eyed, but with bright red hair, he was dressed as any play-goer, in a simple blue kimono, but there was a sort of tension about his body, as if he were about to spring on her and devour her whole. It was startling, and more than that, so terrifying that she couldn't breathe. But she had to breathe.
"What are the Kazekage's dogs even doing here? You clearly wanted to meet with me, unless you're an innocent dupe. Are you? Either way, I'm pretty sure those were Suna ANBU signs you weaved into that play of yours," he growled. "So, talk. Now."
Play the character, play the character! (Choose 1)
[] Admit to the possibility of maybe, potentially, being someone who might have some relations to the Suna ANBU, but who has a message for someone more "weighty" than a Jonin.
[] Tease him, specifically about assuming that the man who was the 'artiste' was the one in charge of any such team. Specifically, carefully beard him as to the nature of this team, and its extent.
[] Order him, in a playful, joking, and deadly serious manner, to leave now, and to bring word to the Oyabun of his suspicions, and the schedule of the play company, and the desire to, perhaps, speak.
[] Deny it entirely, pretending to be a dim patsy of some type, in order to stall for backup which will no doubt be coming if there is enough time, seeing as the second-to-last act will be ending in a few minutes.
[] Write-in.
*******
A/N: I'm sorry this is short! But I do hope you enjoyed it.