Dead Sky: An Exalted Quest

EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 19
[X] Leave it aside for the time being. Be safe.

Somewhat dejectedly, you decide to pack the frame back into the bag. After the experience with the Magma Kraken and the soulsteel mirror, you don't want to take any further risks. Still, you can't help but to feel a sense of personal disappointment as you let go of the trinket.

THE SORCERER: You have failed not only the pursuit of sorcery, but also the very essence of yourself.

He may have a point. All the same, you leave the luggage for now and seat yourself closer to the fire. It seems to be dying, and you realize that you have no idea what to do about it. Hurriedly, you scan the cabin for anything that you can toss upon the pile of embers - and there, in the corner, you notice a pile of chopped wood. You grab one of the pieces - a log heavy enough to twist your wrist as you lift it, reminding you painfully of Ciara's crushing hands moments ago - and toss it onto the pile of embers. It lands with a thud.

For a few minutes, you watch it intently, expecting it to catch fire any moment now. But the embers just glow on, charring the wood slightly where they touch it and sending some acrid smoke wafting up. The expected high flame - and badly needed warmth - refuse to come.

THE CAPTAIN: You have no idea what you are doing.

You are trying to keep a fire going by adding fuel to it. It can't be that hard.

THE CAPTAIN: Is it working, ma'am?

The log, defiantly, refuses to become fuel. In spite of your weary - and cold - glare.

THE CAPTAIN: Exactly. You need subordinates.

You need subordinates for what? A damn firepit? You can't seriously be that inept about it, can you?

THE SORCERER: You are not. You know precisely how to start this fire back up. The only question is whether you still have the will necessary to do what must be done.

Your fingers curl, already prepared to trace out a path for your power. And why shouldn't they?

[ ] Start a fire with sorcery.
[ ] Find Ciara and get her to start the fire.
[ ] Settle for the cold, like a peasant.
 
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EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 20
[X] Find Ciara and get her to start the fire.

Your stars are right. This task is beneath your dignity. You need your subordinates. You need Ciara.

THE CAPTAIN: This is not what I've meant-

Resolutely, you stand up and face the door to the frigid outside.

THE SORCERER: You can't be serious.

You step forward, already drawing your cape closer around you. This will hurt.

THE SORCERER: Stop. Do you have any idea what this is?

THE GAUNTLET: This is sacrifice.

THE SORCERER: No.

The door opens with a groan of rusted hinges. Mountain wind hits you with full force; brightness of the day too blinding to bear.

THE SORCERER: This is worse than failure. This is worse than defeat. You wield the power to shift the course of the sky itself, the amazing cosmic furnace of Sidereal might! At your fingertips, there are the very reins of Fate, threads by which destiny itself is spun...

It's so bright. You open your eyes into narrow slits, then immediately close them again. The gale offers you no pity - and yet, you must step forth all the same. Into the frenzy of the elements, into this forsaken realm of stone, snow, and death.

THE SORCERER: ...and still you refuse to wield it. What broke your soul, pray tell, that you have become afraid of yourself? Will you abandon everything that made you next, and turn to life of a rustic monk, of a blabbering simpleton that others will point at and laugh, saying "this here once was a sorceress of renown, and look now what became of her"? Turn back now. Face your inadequacy and conquer...

Tentatively, you open your eyes again; the day shines with impossible luminosity, the snow around you gleaming with white fire. You breathe in, the crisp winter air almost painful to breathe. And yet-

THE SORCERER: ...there are spirits of primal flame you can summon. Demons you can bind to your will. If you wanted to, you could split Creation apart like a shell and drink incandescent heat straight from its molten heart. If you wanted! But what do you want? I will tell you, what you want is...

The cabin sits at the bottom of a round valley, surrounded on all sides by steep ascent towards peaks likes teeth of some great titan of old. Your eyes rise towards them; stripped white with patches of packed snow, cut sharply against the brilliant blue of an empty sky, they strike something inside of you. Words like "magnificent" or "sublime" come to your lips, and you discard them all, content to silently admire one of Creation's many crowns.

THE SORCERER: ...and what, then, becomes of those who turn away and recant? They are driven to madness by the enormity of their failure. For the rest of their miserable lives, they fear sleep, because to sleep is to dream of what could have been had they only taken their chance - and this dream is all that remains of the greatness that could have been theirs. This is what awaits you. This is where you...

People often think of mountains in winter as this dreary, grey-and-white affair. But if you only bother to learn, to see, you can find so much more. Splashes of deep green where mountain pine clings to the valley-sides, the celestial blues of ice, the rainbow fire that the sun can draw out of the snow-

THE SORCERER: Are you even listening?

No. You're admiring. You wonder how the valley would look higher up from one of the slopes; when you squint, you can just about make what appears to be a narrow trails that could be navigated up its apparently impossibly steep face - and without climbing, even. Of course, that would be terrifically dangerous, especially with the ice, but perhaps worth the risk. Still looking up, you scan the sides of the valley for signs of avalanche threat, but no, not here. Those slopes are far too steep for snow to build up, and besides there just too little of it - just a thin, white veil thrown over the indomitable stone.

THE LOVERS: Beautiful, isn't it?

Yeah.

THE LOVERS: Mountains, too, will never love you back.

You know. That's not the point. You close your eyes and bow your head in a quiet tribute to the summit-gods of this place. When you open them again, you search for Ciara, who happens to be sitting right by the door, back propped against the cabin's log wall. She gives you an inquisitive half-look, but seems more concerned with the very long and very ornate silver pipe hanging from the corner of her mouth.

CIARA: "Don't catch a cold."

[ ] "The fire's gone out. I think I'll freeze. I need help."
[ ] "Weren't you supposed to be preparing for battle, not smoking?"
[ ] "Do you think we could climb that mountain? The one with a crack through it that looks like a scar?"
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 21
[X] "Do you think we could climb that mountain? The one with a crack through it that looks like a scar?"

CIARA: "The answer hasn't changed since yesterday. I could."

She sets a smoke-ring up from the pipe; the wind rips it apart almost immediately. She frowns.

CIARA: "You could too."

Oh! That's excellent - a broad smile arrives on your lips.

CIARA: "If you had proper equipment. And training. As is, you would tumble down from around there..."

She points at somewhere a third way up, where the rock appears stripped. A moraine, perhaps? Treacherous footing, for sure. You nod at Ciara, your smile fading.

CIARA: "...to somewhere around there."

Her claw draws down, to a brown-grey forest line far below.

CIARA: "You're Exalted, so I am not convinced that it would kill you dead, but would probably break every single one of your bird bones."

"Bird bones?"

You do not contest that tumbling down part. The question was stupid. You got ahead of yourself. Gods be kind, but you don't even have solid boots, let alone equipment for trekking in the snow. It's actually kind of baffling that you didn't pack any. You make a mental note to rectify it at the next opportunity.

THE CAPTAIN: Ma'am.

He sounds... proud?

CIARA: "You look like a crow about to finally starve. You brittle, flimsy Bird Bones."

[ ] "My bones are actually stronger than they appear."
[ ] "The way I look is just a temporary setback."
[ ] "Wait, is Bird Bones my name?"
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 22
[X] "The way I look is just a temporary setback."

CIARA: "It's a setback alright."

THE LOVERS: She isn't wrong.

CIARA: "Anyway, for dead gods' sake. Get back inside. I don't want to deal with your pneumonia."

Pouting heavily, you withdraw back, before remembering why you set out to look for the Lunar in the first place.

"But the fire's gone out."

CIARA: "Damn. Shouldn't have let that happen."

She throws another smoke ring into the wind, again to see it obliterated in an instant. If that bothers her, she doesn't let it show.

[ ] "Please, I need your help restarting it."
[ ] "If you don't restart it, I will probably get sick anyway."
[ ] Concede and return inside, under all those pelts and blankets.
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 23
[X] "Please, I need your help restarting it."

Ciara ponders for a moment, focusing mostly on her pipe.

CIARA: "Can't. Preparing for battle."

"But you're smoking!"

CIARA: "Precisely. I fight best when relaxed."

She glances in your direction, her iron-grey eyes openly challenging you to try to bitch at her.

EMBASSY (NORMAL):
1 4
CHECK FAILED.


So you do.

"Why are you like this?"

This time, the smoke ring almost makes it out into the open beyond the cabin's overhanging roof before suffering the fate of its predecessors.

CIARA: "Why indeed?"

THE LOVERS: You should answer this question.

[ ] "Is it because of that mirror? But I apologized."
[ ] "Is it because of that collar? I'm sure it was necessary!"
[ ] "Is it because you're just jealous of my sorcery?"
[ ] This is a trap. Abort. Change subject.
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 24
[x] This is a trap. Abort. Change subject.

You are not about to get fooled again. You are not going to follow down a line of conversation that is obviously leading you towards some kind of an ambush. No. You need to knock the Lunar out of her complacency and sense of security.

"I think I have forgotten what the Work was even supposed to be."

Ciara sends one final puff of smoke towards the wide open sky. She watches it disappear, and then knocks the bottom of the pipe against a rock, knocking the last of ash and embers out.

CIARA: "Go figure."

THE LOVERS: Even now, you fail.

She grunts as she lifts herself from the cold ground, and shoves you back inside, hunching under the low door frame to fit in herself. With a neutral expression on her face, she crouches by the dying fire and moves to start building it back up. For a moment, you watch her work in silence, deeply unsure what to say next, though you have to admit it feels good to throw this one out of your chest.

"Do you know what it was?"

CIARA: "You never bothered to explain. If I recall your exact phrasing, my 'rudimentary Lunar faculties would catastrophically collapse trying to comprehend the sublime astrology involved."

THE SORCERER: Exactly!

THE CAPTIAN: And you have also learned it involved astrology.

Unsurprising. In front of you, Ciara strikes her claws one against each another like fire-irons, producing a shower of sparks. You bite your lip imagining what those same claws could do to soft and tender flesh; then you shake your head and remind yourself you have bigger problems right now.

THE CAPITAN: Like the nature of the Work.

Like the nature of the Work, yes.

CIARA: "You've kept dragging me from one desolate place in Creation to another for about a year, chasing 'sky-readings' and 'conjunctions', producing truly preposterous amounts of notes, and what looked like a bizarre star-map you refused to let me even touch. Considering how most of the time you found even carrying your writing utensils too much of a strain, I'd wager it was very important."

And- and you do remember that. You do remember the chart, a sheet of iron silk you have been preparing for decades now, and which is the keystone of the Work. You screw your eyes shut and try to imagine how it could have looked - and the only reward you reap is a stinging sense of absence, and even worse one of loss.

"That woman who tried to kill me took it, right? It was in that... tube?"

CIARA: "I'd assume so."

THE GAUNTLET: You kept to this knowledge, in spite of everything. It's absolutely vital.

There is a loud whistle as the Lunar blows at the kindling to get it to a higher flame; soon, open fire licks and catches the sides of that log you tried to feed into the firepit earlier.

CIARA: "You were actually almost giddy yesterday, when we got to the observatory. Kept claiming that the 'tedious part' is almost done, and soon we would be entering the exciting phase. Tempting fate, if you ask me."

[ ] Try to figure out what to do next with this knowledge.
[ ] "What do you think I should do next?"
[ ] "Wait, if I don't have any mountaineering equipment, and got up to the observatory, then did you carry there?"
[ ] "Do you know anything about all those weird artifacts I carry around? Were they a part of the Work?"
[ ] "You are being strangely helpful."
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 25
[X] "Do you know anything about all those weird artifacts I carry around? Were they a part of the Work?"

CIARA: "Which part of 'didn't bother to explain shit' is difficult to understand?"

Again with a tired groan, she picks herself up. The way she looks at you - there is deep exhaustion in it.

THE CROW: She knows.

She knows what?

THE CROW: What you refuse to admit.

CIARA: "I know that whatever's trapped in that mirror is bad enough that even you were apprehensive about contacting it..."

THE SORCERER: What? How!

CIARA: "...and never did so unless I was there babysitting you. As for the other thing, I have no idea what it is or what you intended to do with it, but you had that habit of staring into it for hours before sleep. Or instead of sleeping. Kind of freaky."

THE CAPTAIN: Ma'am, that's a very bad habit.

THE GAUNTLET: Necessity leaves no room for rest.

[ ] "What was I even trying to learn from the thing in the mirror?"
[ ] "Sounds like I didn't really take care of myself at all."
[ ] "Sounds like you really didn't take care of me at all."
[ ] "And why did I carry a whole bag of salt with me?"
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 26
[X] "Sounds like I didn't really take care of myself at all."

CIARA: "You were fond of saying that 'rest is the grave of Essence' and that 'you do not cede to the demands of lesser beings'."

You frown.

INTEGRITY (NORMAL):
2 4
CHECK SUCCESS.

"You meant my body?"

CIARA: "Yep."

The fire is now crackling securely anew. Ciara gives you a long look, and then heads towards the door again, and as majestic as the view of the mountains is, you don't actually enjoy the idea of stepping into the snow again. It looks like you have to time to ask her one more question before she leaves.

[ ] "Do you know anything else that could help me remember what the Work was?"
[ ] "What was I discussing with the Thing in the Mirror?"
[ ] "Did I involve anyone other than you in the Work?"
[ ] "Is my name really Bird Bones?"
 
EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 27
[X] "Is my name really Bird Bones?"

CIARA: "Now it is."

THE CAPTAIN: What?

THE SORCERER: What?

"What?"

She pauses in the doorway, glancing at you over her mighty shoulder. Although tired, a smile emerges on her face. The best word to describe it would be "vindictive".

CIARA: "I did my best to scrub the obviously phony name you introduced yourself under from my memory. Looks like you forgot it too, and Bird Bones just suits you better."

THE LOVERS: It really does.

"But what if I don't want to be called that?"

CIARA: To know the world is to own it, eh?

THE SORCERER: How dare she sully my scripture with those full, moist barbarian lips of her!

THE LOVERS: Bird. Bones.

You stand in place stunned, watch the door close behind Ciara. Bird Bones. You are Bird Bones.

THE CAPTAIN: "You can shorten it to Bird, ma'am. That's a little better."

THE SORCERER: She naming you? What's next, her putting you on a leash and a collar, like an exotic pet?

Extremely intently, you sit down, and do not think about it. Your new name bounces on the underside of your skull a few times, before settling into some emptied, but familiar place. Like covering a stain on a wall with a painting. Of bird bones. The weight of what has just transpired hits you, and crushes you.

[ ] Cry about it.
[ ] Rage about it.
[ ] Make peace with it.
 
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EVIDENCE OF HER PASSAGE 28

Bird Bones! Not even a name, but a nickname, and not even one given in endearment, but rather meant as a harsh-edged joke! Your feelings slide easily into deep tracks years of shame and humiliation have left. Bird Bones! Yet another bruise for your soul, yet another small shame to carry around, like a pebble in the shoe, too insignificant to be called a misery, and yet making itself felt with each step taken. You had once kept a tight ledger of those indignations, obsessively holding onto each little memory of humiliation and folly. Now, those memories are all gone, and yet a weight remains in their place, a phantom pain mourning after the amputated extremities of your soul.

You had a name once that was sleek and powerful, and which you carried in secrecy and pride. Now, it's gone, and your name is Bird Bones.

Once you realize it, there is no more holding back of all the devils hounding you, even if you no longer hound them. The taut, little feeling that had nestled itself underneath your pierced heart finally opens, and let me tell you how: like a spool of steel wire, wound so tight that the metal itself groans with the stress of being held. Maybe there was a time when you could have unrolled it safely, straightening the steel inch by inch. But that time, too, had been lost, so now it opens, and it cuts.

It's not fair. It's not fair that you have lost all memory of yourself, but for the overwhelming sense of loss. You did as the Captain said, and sifted through the flotsam in your soul, and what did you find? A ship's manifest for what you had once contained, and now could only register as empty room and knotted scar tissue. It's not fair! Whoever did this to you could have at least granted you blissful oblivion, the destruction of self that would not leave this sorry wreck you glanced in the mirror.

Crying, too, comes easily, stilted sobs drawn from some ugly inside-place of yours, easy to mistake for the croaking and crowing of toads and ravens. It doesn't feel good; it doesn't feel like a dam bursting, or some secret hurt being finally tended to. If anything, it feels like going through the motions of loss and misery, and the worst part is that you have forgotten how good you were at that.

Your stars have nothing to say; and even if they were to speak, it's not words that could bring you comfort but that which can never cross the wide-open celestial span. This, too, is a familiar hurt.

But there is always an ending, and the black moment is no different. Once you have sobbed your last, and let the sorry and shame withdraw to their low tide, you are left alone by the fire, warm, tired, and so far away from everything you have ever wanted, whatever those things were. But with flame, a voice comes back, the one that could never leave you, not even at the bottom of you.

THE SORCERER: You know what would cheer you up.

There is no question.

[ ] Think about power.
[ ] Think about power.
[ ] Think about power.
 
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