Athetos (Ranma 1/2)

[Strawberry]

So I've had this one planned for a while whilst Changeling was being written. Yes the name is an Axiom Verge reference.

This fic isn't exactly a sequel to Changeling, it's more of a spinoff from a what-if my brain provided during writing - that is, what if the idle wish Ranko makes to bring Akane's mother back isn't so idle?

If you've not read Changeling, I'd recommend at least reading through to the end of Chapter 8 before reading this as that'll give context to why Ranko makes the wish she does. It also pretty much starts (and diverges) from the beginning of Chapter 9.

I'm going to be pretty blunt here - this story is going to get really bleak. And I mean more bleak than Changeling could get at its worst. It's going to contain some pretty dark themes of isolation and loneliness.

Where Changeling was an exploration of an aspect of transition where people act as if you killed your 'old self', then an exploration of grief, love and loss, this is more an exploration of how self-destructive we can be to ourselves, especially when cripplingly low self-esteem takes self-sacrifice too far.

I plan on things eventually getting better but the journey there? Let's just say it won't be pleasant for our girl.

Also, the Berry in this is an old character from a magical girl roleplay I ran once on essvee. I figured I'd dust her off since I needed a wish-granter.

Here she is:

Spoiler: Magical Girl Berry

In the end, be careful what you wish for, it might just happen.

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Chapter 1 - Ranko's Wish

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Saotome Ranko, newly named, newly made up with her best friend, dozes, arms around Akane, Akane's arms around her after their discussion, their confessions, their making up. Half-awake, but not asleep, she ponders the night's words.

Ranko can't stop thinking about Akane's anguish over her mother's death. She sees it clearly; how the death of Tendou Kimiko all but ruined their family. It turned Soun into a manchild. It turned Kasumi into a housewife and Nabiki into a mercenary with no feeling, and it turned Akane into an angry, awful mess.

"I wish it were her mother that was here, not me." Is her first thought on realising this. It's not the first time she's wished not exist, in favour of someone else. For the past three weeks she's wished she could bring Ranma back and make everyone happy. She knows it probably isn't right, but the wish is still there.

She could do something useful with her life, rather than hanging around like a corpse that forgot to die.

"You could, you know?" The voice is bubbly, bright, and Ranko finds herself sitting at a table. Which is very strange, because she was just in bed. She looks around, and the room is bright and cheerful, though the details are fuzzy. Akane's not near her anymore, and she's now dressed in the 'China' overall outfit she really loves, rather than her pyjamas.

Sitting across from her is a tiny girl, barely two thirds her height, with curly bright pink hair tied up in two long tails. She's wearing a chef's jacket with many badges down one side, and a ruffled, short skirt with an apron pinned over it. Her legs have knee-length white socks and she's wearing pink mary-janes. A halo of pink fuzz hovers over her head, and behind her stretch wings that appear to be made of cotton candy, drifting slowly in a non-existent wind.

Ranko stares and the pinkette smiles at her warmly, the pink eyes set into her cute face suddenly ancient. "You can call me Berry." She says. "I'm a goddess of magical girls, and desserts."

Ranko starts. Then she remembers the words she'd said at first. "You said… I could. I could do what?"

"Do something useful with your life." Berry beams. "Like live!"

"…Did you read my mind?"

The pink-haired angel shrugs. "Hazard of being a goddess. But I did hear your wish to bring your friend's mother back. It's a stupid wish."

"Why?"

"Wishes have prices. Living is both its own price and its own reward."

Ranko blinks at the strange magical girl, who waves a hand. A small… thing that looks like a plushie wearing a two-toned waistcoat floats over with a cake it sets in front of Ranko and the girl urges her to eat.

"Like I said, I'm a goddess of desserts. And magical girls. But I'm not here to hire you; I'm just doing someone a favour. Well, more like community service. There was an incident involving a moon and, you know how the bureaucracy is." The pinkette rubs the back of her head. "You know how many neutron-star density fruitcakes it takes to blow up a moon?"

"Ah.. N-no…"

"Turns out one. At sufficient velocity." Berry giggles to herself embarrassedly.

"Wh-what?"

"Yeah, don't test your powers in an unfamiliar universe."

"What." Ranko eats the dessert, and to her lack of surprise it's delicious. Given that the girl in front of her claims to be a goddess of desserts it's fairly obvious it would be. She looks up as the pinkette continues talking.

"Anyway, as currently I'm doing community service as a wish-fulfilment goddess, I could bring your friend's mother back, amend everything that happened after that by fixing that one thing. Or you could go back to sleep with my blessing and live your life, make up with everyone and go and become a doctor. There's dancing and kissing and snuggling in that future." The tiny goddess leans back in her chair, looking troubled. "I don't want to grant this wish, to be honest."

Ranko stares. "Why don't you? Why are you trying to convince me otherwise?"

The goddess frowns. "Because the price is way, way too high. Things like this, they always come with a price. Trust me. I wish it weren't so, but the power has to come from somewhere for a wish like this. Filling a hole left in the world? Altering history, even a tiny bit? That kind of power extracts a heavy price from whoever makes the wish."

Ranko swallows. Makes a decision. "I'll pay any price. I want my friends happy. It doesn't matter what the price is, if they're happy they deserve it."

Berry smiles softly. "You're a sweet girl, but hear the price first before agreeing. The price… is you."

"What do you mean?" Ranko asks.

"I mean that… the price is your existence. Everything in this world that is you. Ranma and Ranko Saotome won't ever have existed. In that hole in the world, Kimiko Tendou will not have died, leaving her family broken. And maybe it does help her family. But it's too high a price." Berry looks at Ranko, her bright pink eyes once again ancient. "You can trust me on how much that sucks."

"I'll do it. I'd die for them." Ranko says firmly. And, she realises, she would. It's not just how little she cares for her own existence; it's also how much she loves all of them.

"I never said you'd die." The pinkette says sadly. "You will still be there. Alive. But alone. You won't be a part of a family, no one will know you. You won't exist anywhere officially. It'll be like you just," She snaps her fingers and a cloud of pink smoke appears as if from nowhere, another Berry sitting in a chair that wasn't there before. The two speak at once. "Appeared from thin air fully formed. Just your own memories."

Ranko swallows as she sees the whole price. The horror, tenfold her current horror. Then her heart hardens in resolve. "I'm already dead. Just a corpse walking around." Berry's face falls at that and she shakes her head.

"You're going to do this because you don't feel like you're worth anything. But what's it going to accomplish?"

"Will they be happier?" Ranko asks, sharply for her. Berry winces.

"…They… won't be as damaged, so… yeah. They will be… better I suppose." The words are dragged out, as if the pinkette doesn't want to say them. "You've got to remember though, child, it's not a be-all-end-all fix. People are flawed. Their core beings won't change a great deal."

"I'm doing this." Ranko says, stubbornly. "I want them to be happy, and if me being gone rather than a jibakurei will not make them happy, perhaps I can do something good with my existence."

Berry sighs and a few tears leak from her eyes. "Please don't make me do this, Ranko." She says, wiping her eyes. "You're too kind a girl to realise what this is going to do to you."

"Do it."

Berry rummages in her pocket and pulls out a tiny pink phone, pressing a button and putting it to her ear.

"I'm not doing this." She says, bottom lip trembling. "I'm not. You can't make me." She pauses as a voice comes through indistinctly to Ranko. "No. I know. I know I signed the waiver. I know I agreed, but this is too much. You're making me incubator this poor girl."

Berry's hand goes over her eyes. "No. No I know if she says 'I wish' that I'm forced. But if this were Madoka she'd be a witch in a day. I can tell these things. Yes I know you don't know what I'm on about." She holds the phone away from her head and winces. "Alright. Fine. But I'm doing it my way, and if you interfere…" Something dark grows in the space inside the cotton-candy halo. "I'll do something unpleasant to your entire bureaucracy." She winces. "No, I'm not sorry. But you will be since you've made me incubator a girl who deserves better."

Berry cuts the phone call off by folding the phone back up and putting it back in her pocket. Ranko stares, nonplussed while Berry gathers her thoughts. Finally, the pinkette speaks.

"Ranko. I'm going to tell you this now. If I fulfil this wish, you will be alone. You hear me? Alone. I don't think you quite understand the magnitude of it. But right now, you could walk away and you could go back to your bed, back to Akane and you can live your life. I'm giving you an out of making this wish, and forcing me to destroy you."

Ranko shakes her head. "If there's a chance, I don't matter. I wish…"

Berry holds up her hand. "If you do this; there is no going back."

Ranko bulls on. "I wish for you to bring Tendou Kimiko back so she never died. I know the price, and I accept the price."

Berry looks sorrowful as something takes a hold of her power. "…So be it." She claps her hands, and a ball of energy erupts from Ranko, coalescing in her hands. Ranko sees it – everyone's knowledge, the very existence of herself barring her own memories and physical self, wrapped up.

Berry smiles softly at her, gently, like her mother does. There's a deep sadness in it, though, a disappointment. "I will take this from you too, but I suspect that's a blessing." She grips a thread on Ranko's spirit and pulls. A black-haired boy made of thread slams into the energy. "No more transforming. Least I can do when you're being an idiot and so selfless."

Berry also pulls a few threads from the mass of energy, setting them as if on bobbins of thread. She tucks them way. "These are for later." She says, "In case the wish needs more power."

The goddess' eyes blaze, and the halo above her head expands into concentric rainbow circles, a gaping void in the centre that the mass of energy flies into the centre, hovering there.

Ranko opens her mouth and then Berry reaches up, grasps around the mass of energy. She squeezes.

And.

Everything.

Goes.

White.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 2 - New Worlds

So they say,
You'll be OK,
But words are not enough.
Nobody remembered me,
The words were not enough.

- Spirit Will Collide by Devin Townsend

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The energy flies into the world, diving through time and through space. Shoring up cracks where they were, repairing things and changing so many things.

In a hospital bed, in the past, a woman who was to die recovers. Doctors call it a miracle, a last-minute treatment that completely negated her illness. Tendou Kimiko doesn't die there.

She grows strong. Stronger than before, alive in a way no one can really understand – the long-running illness she had finally defeated. Her family thank the kami and make extra offerings that year but they're directing their thanks in the wrong direction.

Kimiko swears, for ten years she swears that at the foot of her hospital bed, away from her family, she sees a girl. A girl with red hair and blue eyes and a kindness to her eyes that makes her seem almost like a guardian angel. She sometimes thinks at the time she heard a voice, a voice that said. "Love my family well. I leave so you live."

The times she remembers the figure are in waking dreams, daydreams or when she has just awoken and is between sleep and reality.

The morning has dawned like any other, and Kimiko is busy preparing breakfast for her gaggle of children.

Well, she thinks, perhaps not necessarily like any other. Soun had been… frisky this morning. He'd slept poorly; some dream keeping him from properly sleeping. He'd looked haunted, and she smiles as she remembers him peppering her face and lips with whiskery kisses until the two of them had made love.

They don't often do so in the mornings – their children are a little too grown up now to not know what they've been doing, but they were both up so early. She blushes and shakes her head. Even twenty years into marriage, Soun can still make her feel like that schoolgirl he'd asked out all those years ago.

She'd asked why he'd been so playful in a morning, and with the brightest smile he could manage he'd said that he'd dreamed that he'd lost her, all those years ago, and that he'd become a husk of a man. "It had felt so real." He'd said before he'd kissed her again and they went for another round.

Kimiko ponders this. Her own dreams had been troubled. She remembers a black nothingness and watching her family from above as it had disintegrated. She remembers seeing them all suffer, but not being able to do anything about it.

She remembers… In the dream, a young black-haired boy… Or was it a red-haired girl, like the one she remembers from the hospital?

She shakes her head and returns to the task at hand, readying breakfast.

Of course, Kasumi's up first, yawning but already dressed for the day in her smart clothes. She sets her laptop bag down near the genkan and moves to the kitchen, pulling on an apron and then, uncharacteristically, takes her mother in a gentle embrace, squeezing her close. "Good morning, Mother." She says softly, before stepping back and starting to help with the miso soup.

"Good morning Kasumi." Kimiko smiles at her eldest. "That was an unusual good morning for you."

"I had bad dreams." Kasumi says, focusing on the soup. "I dreamed you'd died when you got ill. It wasn't very nice."

Kimiko looks concerned. "I had a similar dream. I know it's not been long since the time of year it happened, but…"

Kasumi smiles. "That must be it. But I'm glad it wasn't true." She looks up as there's an outraged yell and a thump from upstairs. "Ah, Nabiki and Akane must be awake."

Kimiko sighs as Akane stomps down the stairs in her pyjamas. Her hair's dripping and she is about to launch into a rant about Nabiki's prank before she stops. "M-mom." She says, her voice sounding shocked a moment. Then she's there, arms about Kimiko. Thankfully she'd managed to put the knife down.

Kimiko hugs onto her youngest daughter, who sniffles a few times. "S-sorry Mom, I had this… But it felt so real…"

Kimiko hugs her daughter back. "Well, I'm here dear. Though could you squeeze me a little less hard. I'm not made of iron like your father."

Akane steps back, blushing slightly and twirling her short hair in her fingers. "Sorry. I just…"

Nabiki's next down, dishevelled as she always is in the morning pre-coffee. She too stops at the entrance to the kitchen, but controls herself well enough to not rush into the already crowded room. "Mom." She says, a note of wonder in her voice. Her head shakes. "Knew it was a dream."

Kimiko looks around at her family. "…Did everyone have bad dreams last night where I was gone?" She asks faintly.

Looking around at the nods, Kimiko feels a little faint. "I see. I wonder what brought it on? I'm here, anyway. Perhaps it's something in the spirit of the house out of balance. I'll see if I can get some incense later, or…" She pauses. Kasumi's looking expectantly out the door with the half-coverings partly draped on Nabiki's head. "Kasumi?"

Kasumi's mouth purses. "I… don't know. I was expecting someone to come through complaining about the noise."

Akane blinks and looks out. "…Me too. A boy. Wait, no, a girl."

Nabiki smirks. "Of course it's a girl for you." She teases and Akane shrugs.

"Can't help being the way I am, onee-chan. But no, it's a girl I'm expecting…"

"A girl with red hair?" Kimiko asks. They turn to her. The silence stretches.

Then the moment passes as something goes ding in the room and they return to normal, the weirdness forgotten as they scramble to do their morning rituals. Soun and Akane spar, Kasumi helps Kimiko with breakfast and Nabiki stares blankly from the engawa until she's finished her first coffee.

The only one who seems to remember the weird moment is Kimiko and it gives her pause as she cleans up after breakfast. "What… was that?" She wonders. "Why did they expect to see that girl? And why don't they remember how weird it was?"

She wonders if No-chan had had the same dream. The girl had looked a little like her friend. A pity she was away at a conference else she'd have asked.

Shaking her head, she makes her way to the dojo once her children have left the house to watch her husband prepare for the day's teaching.

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Ranko finds herself on the doorstep of The Bakery (she'd been told the place's name and given the stress on the words, capital letters seemed the best way to describe it), standing next to a girl maybe a year or two older than her with skin so pale as to be practically translucent and dark, purplish veins across that skin. She has hair in a brownish red colour, and sharp fangs when she grins.

She grins a lot. Not always nicely, not always in a happy way.

She's wearing a purple hoodie, black denim shorts with purple tights underneath them and purple canvas shoes, and in her arms is an eldritch horror that Ranko couldn't put a name to. It's adorably evil-looking though.

"I'm Rachel, this is-" The girl makes a two-minute long noise like a dial-up modem. Reality shivers around her. "….But most people can't say it so I call him Bob." She puts the creature on her head, and he curls up to resemble a bucket hat with a big eye on the front. Rachel grins at Ranko easily, folding her arms. Her fingernails, Ranko notices, are purple crystal talons.

The tiny pink goddess Berry steps out with a backpack in hand. "Here you go, Ranko." She says, handing it over. "There's a Fuurinkan High uniform and gym clothes in there and the pyjamas your mother gave you. All your books are here." She hands her a book bag. "And a bentou made by me." She hands the last item to Ranko. The box has her name's kanji on it, though only her given name. It also has a stylised chibi-Berry (despite that the girl already looks like one) design on it.

"The uniforms aren't new, I had to bring them here when someone had thrown them out, so they're a touch threadbare I'm afraid, but they'll do. I'd probably say not to hang around too much except to confirm."

Ranko looks herself down. She's still in the 'China' overalls. Then she looks at the streets. "It… doesn't look any different." She says softly. Rachel gives a strange, sad smile.

"Trust me, it won't until you meet people you used to know." The auburn-haired girl says, sharp teeth in her grin, sharpness in the expression, like bitterness as well as insouciance. "That's when it'll hit you. Don't think the world'll change hugely just because you don't exist anymore." Ranko feels a pang in her heart when Rachel puts it so bluntly. "We're all just little cogs in little wheels in bigger cogs that drive the world, kiddo." Rachel ruffles her hair. "Anyway, off you pop."

Berry smiles sadly at Ranko. Tears stand in those ancient pink eyes. "I'm sorry." She says. "I am so sorry. I wish I could have not granted this wish, but I had to. You're going to find this hard. I hope you do well."

She hugs Ranko around her midsection, reaching upwards given her tiny stature and for a moment, a single, wonderful moment Ranko feels entirely, completely safe and warm. Enveloped in a pink and fluffy bubble of reality as something akin to a concept turns its attention to her and simply surrounds her.

The pink-haired goddess steps back and the warmth disappears. "Goodbye, Ranko. Best of luck to you." She smiles and the two girls turn.

Ranko bows, but when she looks up, the Bakery is gone, leaving an empty storefront. She'd have thought it a dream if it weren't for the backpack in one hand, the bentou and book bag in the other. She stares at the items and finds a bench nearby, intending to look through the backpack, but catches sight of a clock. She needs to hurry from… wherever it is she is if she's going to get to Fuurinkan high on time, especially if she's to change into the uniform en route.

She starts walking quickly, hoping she'll get to see Akane or Ryouga or someone she knows.

If nothing else someone to recognise her.

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Changing in the nearby train station bathroom, Ranko looks at herself. Dishevelled. She sighs, wishing for her makeup kit. At least the backpack had a hairbrush in it and she quickly teases her curls into something resembling order.

She takes a deep breath and tries something. She sets the tap to hot water and splashes her face.

Nothing happens.

She does it again and still nothing happens. She smiles. That, at least, is gone. Like a weight from her chest, a demon from her back. Her face falls as she remembers that it was part of the price, and she is only now starting to consider that she may have made a bad decision.

She smooths down the uniform and takes a breath. It's slightly patched, though the job is so good that she can barely tell. More concerning is Kasumi's mark on the label. Then again, Berry had said that they couldn't just create the uniform here so perhaps it was one that Kasumi had thrown out. The PE uniform is the same, lightly patched in that expert way Kasumi manages, but still old.

She'd looked at herself while changing and hoped no one would question the bruises. The ones from the bridge are still rather nasty, and there are still ones from Akane's mallet, though they're fading a little.

Ranko sighs and summons up her courage. Nothing seemed too different yet, but Rachel had had a point – no one person has such an impact on the world, even herself with the chaos surrounding her.

She steps out and back onto the streets. Then a familiar figure looms in the distance and passes her and Ranko's heart clenches. Kasumi.

The eldest Tendou isn't in her house dress and apron, though. She's in a very flattering shirt dress with a collar and belt around the midriff, a small jacket over that. Her hair was still the same side-tail, only a black ribbon tying it and not a white one. Her face is less worried and more carefree, and she has a satchel over one shoulder as she walks.

She looks like she's heading to a class or a job.

Kasumi had walked past her and given little more than the cordial nod she gives everyone. There's no recognition in her eyes.

There's no recognition in her eyes.

Ranko feels faint and her stomach churns. She turns and looks at Kasumi who has stopped and is looking at a stall. She watches as Kasumi accidentally drops one of the oranges that she was looking at, and it rolls to Ranko's feet. Numbly she reaches down and picks it up, walking over.

"U-um… Excuse m-me…"

Kasumi's face lights up a second and Ranko's heart constricts in hope before she sees the absolute lack of recognition again in the eldest Tendou sister's eyes as she takes the orange from Ranko.

"Thank you, miss." Kasumi says warmly, as warmly as she does for a total stranger. Ranko nods, a sick, horrible feeling in her gut.

"Y-you're welcome T-Tendou-san…" Ranko manages and she steps backwards, then bows and turns around, walking quickly in the direction of Fuurinkan high. Her breath hitches and she feels dizzy as she walks.

Back at the stall, Kasumi blinks. Did she know the girl? She's in the same uniform her sisters wear, but otherwise Kasumi would have remembered the red hair if nothing else, given how distinctive it is.

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Ranko moves quickly along the familiar path to Fuurinkan high, passing the road to the Tendou Dojo as she does. She's tempted to linger by and see if there's any changes, but the way her heart hurts from meeting Kasumi makes her reconsider.

She slows down. They're all going to be there. Everyone she knows.

Can she handle it?

Lost in thought, she absently moves to the side to let a girl on a bike past and then blinks. Nabiki's retreating form zooms ahead and Ranko giggles to herself. At least that hadn't changed.

Another form runs past her, almost clipping her.

"Sorry!" Yells Akane as she goes and Ranko's heart quickens a moment. She sees the short hair, but there's something in Akane's bearing, something different.

Hurrying to catch up, Ranko stops and stares at the ranks of about fifteen boys lining the gates.

Akane doesn't stop, she ploughs into them like a cannonball, but there's something different about the fights. Something seems… off about how it's going. Ranko walks ahead, used to the maelstrom of flying bodies, and she's in the middle of it all before she realises. No one's going into a crater or being hurt too badly. In fact…

She helps one to his feet and he bows before returning to the fray, a little wobbly. In fact… it looks like a spar. Akane doesn't have her old expression of anger and hate, but a grin. An almost… cocky grin as she demolishes fifteen boys at once.

Sure, they're all ending up in groaning piles, but they aren't injured or in craters and they're all commiserating with one another.

"Kami, does she have to hit so hard?"

"You told her you could take it, Ueda."

"Yeah, well I didn't expect an elbow to the solar plexus…"

Ranko realises it's weird as well because by this point the horde should have stopped. Except hadn't she stopped it? Or they'd stopped because of her old self at least.

She walks on by as Akane calls out an apology for the display until a figure steps in front of her and she looks up into the face of Kunou Tatewaki.

"What a beauteous flower to hath descended 'pon our fair school!" He intones at her, approaching. Ranko quails under his gaze.

"A-ah…" She's not had to deal with him since she changed, and she'd hoped that she wouldn't have to.

She hears a slam and a final groan behind her and turns to see Akane standing amidst the pile of groaning boys on the floor, dusting her hands off.

"Sorry guys, looks like I win today's spar. Again." Akane says, that grin still on her face. It's a friendly, open sort of smile. The kind that Ranko's old self would have made, and the boys groan in response. "Same time tomorrow?" Groan. "Alright then. Honestly guys, you need to practice more. I'd not beat you all so handily if you tried harder."

"Beauteous Tigress, the fair Tendou Akane, will you go out with me?"

"No." Akane says, brushing her hair out her eyes. "Stop asking me, senpai. No means no, and you know I don't go for boys."

Kunou turns back to Ranko, who steps back. He grabs for her hands. "How about you, fiery haired beauty?"

"…Um…"

"Come now, your beauty is as the rising sun, silk hiding steel for you move like an artiste of the martial variety! Pray honour this man with a date!"

"Ah…" Ranko struggles to keep her hands out of his. "Please leave me alone."

She's interrupted by the sound of Kunou slamming into the wall nearby and sliding down it.

"Senpai, she doesn't want your attentions. She's obviously new, please leave her alone!" Akane's voice cuts through the haze. Kunou lands at the bottom in a dazed sprawl wall and Akane turns to her. "Hey, you ok?"

Ranko looks up at her saviour, right into a pair of extremely familiar brown eyes. Ba-thump goes her heart.

It's not the similarities she notes, it's the tiny differences she can see now she's up close. The lack of certain tightness in the eyes. A more carefree expression than she'd ever seen Akane have. She stands steadier, straighter. She looks comfortable, not angry. Slightly amused, not raging about boys. She's got short hair still, even though that had been Ranko's fault in the first place.

"I… um." Her face is suddenly flaming as Akane smiles at her. There's a slight blush on the short-haired girl's cheeks as she takes in the red-haired girl. She brightens as she doesn't recognise her.

The look makes Ranko shiver, something crawling across her spine.

"Oh you're new! Hey, let me show you in!"

Ranko's aware of a hand taking hers and she follows on meekly as Akane leads her into the school. "Honestly, that boy really doesn't know when to back off!" The short-haired girl grumbles, and Ranko is surprised not to hear simmering hateful rage but a long-suffering annoyance. The difference would be slight to anyone else, but to someone who knows Akane as well as she does it's clear. "Really, I wish they'd suspend him or something, it's one thing to accost me once a day, and thank the heavens we talked him down to that, but to accost new students? Ugh!"

They stop in one of the halls and Akane finally lets go of her hand. Ranko blushes and looks away. "Th-thank you, Tendou-san." She says, embarrassed.

"Don't worry about it. Creeps like Kunou-senpai seem to be a dime a dozen here." Akane smiles. "I'm Tendou Akane, how about you?"

Ranko looks into the eyes and now she's not so caught up in the mortifying presence of Kunou Tatewaki the full import of what's happened slams into her. Akane's not looking at her like her fiancée-turned-sister, not like the person who had spoken with her so deeply only last night. Not the girl who she'd held in her arms and cried with.

No recognition. Ranko's eyes tear up and she sniffles, but swallows it down. She schools her expression, pushing all of the horror she's feeling down. She can't inconvenience someone who doesn't know her. Dabbing her eyes with a tissue to try not to mess her makeup, she looks at the floor. "…Ranko." She says. She hasn't a name here, after all. No family name at that. Who knows if her father and mother are even alive, or if there's someone else in her place? "S-sorry."

Akane looks curious. "There a family name to go with that, Ranko-san?" She asks, that friendly smile still on her face.

There's so much different.

"J-just Ranko." The redhead replies, still looking at the floor. "I-I need to… Register, I s-s-suppose…"

"I'll show you where the office is!" Akane smiles brightly at her and motions. "Come on, let's get you there before the bell."

Ranko falls into step beside the girl who doesn't recognise her, her heart sinking deep into her chest. She tries to see this as a positive – she has a chance for a completely fresh start with Akane, maybe it's a good thing. Maybe they can be friends this time, right from day one.

She realises almost immediately she'd be lying to herself if she did. Her world, the world she existed in, the world she had a place, is gone.

It wouldn't be the same, could never be the same. Her Akane, her family, her world is gone, changed beyond recognition and yet the same in all the minor details.

What have I done?

 

[Strawberry]

Alright, chapter 3 folks.


Chapter 3 - Faint Reflection

Faking,
There's nothing here worth taking,
Just my reflection fading on the wall,
Not the fairest one of all,
I'm looking for a place I'll never see again.

A night turns to a day,
A street I've never walked on,
I was never here,
Just a faint reflection.

- Sleep Walking by The Birthday Massacre

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Ranko sits in the office, uncomfortably perched on a chair in her slightly shabby uniform.

"So," The secretary says, tapping in at her computer. "Your name is Ranko, what's the family name?"

"Ah…" Ranko shuffles. "I um… I don't really have o-one." She says. "I-I don't th-think they registered me."

The woman eyes the girl with red hair. "Are your parents both Japanese?" She asks.

Ranko squirms. "As far as I know. I grew up here, though we wandered a lot."

"Hmm. I suppose it might take time to find you. I don't suppose you have any ideas?"

"S-Saotome, or H-Himura, ma'am." Ranko says softly. "But I d-d-doubt I'll b-be found. Father was not one to deal with authorities and I barely met my mother before she was taken from me."

The secretary purses her lips. "Well, I'll register you as simply 'Ranko' in the system for now until we can find or register you."

"Th-thank you, ma'am." Ranko says politely. She provides the kanji for her new name, 'Orchid' and 'Child'. A stab goes through her heart as she remembers she never got to tell her mother or Ryouga or Ucchan.

"Well, there we go. Here's your pass." She hands Ranko the laminated card with a terrible photograph of her on it. "Fortunately, you've already met the representative for your class, Tendou Akane, so she'll be able to guide you there. Isn't that right, Tendou-kun?"

Akane blushes as the secretary opens the door and shows she'd been eavesdropping. Himura. Like Auntie? "Ah, yes, Hirasawa-sensei."

Ranko looks to Akane, a complicated expression on her face. Akane seems so full of life. Like she was before, only brighter. But she doesn't know Ranko.

Is that all it takes for everyone to be happier, for her not to have existed? Could it simply be her mother or is there more at work.

Jibakurei.

She shakes her head and stands from the seat, brushing her dress off. "I p-put myself in your hands, Tendou-san." She says, bowing.

Akane looks over her. Yes please, that would be pretty goo… hells you don't even know her! "Ah… Y-yeah, no problem Ranko-san." She says, a blush on her cheeks.

"Well," The secretary says, smiling between the two. "Off you go, better get to your classes."

Akane nods and Ranko follows her to the classroom. She has to pretend she doesn't know the way, even though these halls are entirely familiar.

Perhaps not entirely. They're a lot less damaged than they were before. The paint not so peeling, the décor not so drab due to the contractors giving up after one too many incidents. Like Akane, the school seems brighter and better for her absence and Ranko feels another stab in her heart.

As they pass the second-years' classrooms, Nabiki pops her head out. "Hey sis, who's the cutie? New girlfriend?" Her eyebrows waggle and Akane just pokes her forehead, shoving her into the room again.

"No, Nabiki, new student. Her name's Ranko."

Ranko bows to Nabiki and completes the trifecta of the Tendou sisters looking on her like a stranger. Something hollow fills the pit of her stomach, something dark and squirming. Nabiki gives her the once-over and smiles mischievously. "Tendou Nabiki." She says. "I'm Akane's older sister. I kinda run information around here, and if you're being bullied it's best to come to me, alright? Being new sucks, so I try to make sure everyone gets on."

Ranko nods. "My name is Ranko, Tendou-san. I'm not sure how long I will be here for, but I will keep that in mind, thank you." Nabiki offering those kinds of services is new. Ranko takes a moment to study Nabiki subtly, though she knows she fails to be unnoticed by Nabiki's smirk.

Nabiki looks mostly unchanged except there's… less sharpness to her features, less vicious ice queen and more mischievous princess? Ranko can't really put it into words, but the normally mercenary girl looks friendlier than she ever has to Ranko, stands a little straighter, looks a little less desperate and cold. Like Akane and probably Kasumi before (given her attire and the satchel) her self seems improved.

Ranko gives a shy smile and then looks to Akane. She finds it hardest to look at Akane, but it's easier than looking at the floor or the walls.

Nabiki catches her look and her smile widens. She reaches out and pats Akane on the arm. "Nice moves, imouto-chan." She smirks and retreats before Akane can push her back in.

Akane rolls her eyes and looks to Ranko. "Sorry about my sister, she's… intense. And money grubbing."

Ranko rubs her arms and nods. "Can we get to class please, Tendou-san?"

"O-oh!" Akane blushes. "Sure!"

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Ranko stands in front of her class, feeling a bizarre dislocation that's been nagging at her the entire time and growing stronger with every moment. She stands here, a new student to a class she'd grown to know or at least be acquainted with, but even then her memories as Ranma are still kind of fuzzy, as if someone else's.

"Ranko-san, why don't you introduce yourself?"

Ranko swallows and bows after writing the kanji for her name on the board. Her given name, anyway. "Good morning, my name is Ranko. I currently have no family name. Please take care of me." She bows a second time. The teacher smiles at her – and it's not miss Hinako, but the old one.

There's general murmuring as there always is, and she blushes as she overhears Daisuke and Hiroshi high fiving in celebration of there being another cute girl in their class. A few of the girls seem to be commenting on her bust, while there's a buzz of whether she has a boyfriend or not. Only a few seem to be wondering about her lack of a family name, which is almost unheard of. A few wonder if she's somehow been disowned.

"Thank you, Ranko-san." The teacher – Arizawa-sensei now she remembers – interrupts the gossip. "There's a space between Tamaki and Tendou so please sit there."

"Y-yes." Ranko stammers. She makes her way down to her seat and sits down, looking straight ahead. The dislocation's getting worse, that dark feeling pooling in her stomach growing. No one recognises her. Surely there'd be one, it can't be this complete, can it.

As the first lesson gets under way, she surreptitiously rubs her eyes and diligently takes notes. She smiles at her handwriting, so different from when she was Ranma. Neat and precise. She'd seen her mother's beautiful handwriting and with everything else about her mother, wanted to emulate it.

Mother… She wonders. No, no, her mother has to recognise her. She can't have just sprung fully formed into this world, how the hell would that even work? No, she had to have been born or been taken care of, right? It's not realistic.

Almost as unrealistic as a wish being granted.

Her stomach clenches and it feels like all the blood drains from her body. No. No she has to remember. She's my mother.

She's interrupted from her musings by the change of classes, and after the teacher's walked out is when she's ambushed by the usual crowds. It's not the first time for her, though technically it is. Ranko looks at her notebook.

"Ne, Ranko-san, why don't you have a family name? Are you ronin?"

"N-no I just…"

"Yuka don't pester her about that, it must be personal."

"S-sorry, Ranko-san, just curious."

"That's fine." Ranko says. It isn't fine.

"You need to tell me what dye you use, Ranko-san, it's gorgeous." Sayuri says. Ranko has to pretend not to know her, too. It's too much, it's too much now.

"U-um, it's not d-d-d-dyed." Ranko says, squirming.

Sayuri whistles. "Wow, really? That's the most vibrant red I've ever seen, especially on someone Japanese."

She can hear the undercurrents wondering if she's really Japanese.

"Well it's nice to have more cute girls in the class, especially such gifted ones." Hiroshi says. Was he always so forward? Ranko blushes and squirms in her seat again, not looking at everyone. They're all too close.

"Hiroshi, you horndog, leave her be." Yuka says.

"Hey, you bothered her first!"

"Guys!" Akane says loudly. Everyone turns to look at the short-haired girl. "Come on, give her some space. Can't you see she's shy?"

Everyone looks between them. Sayuri has a knowing look in her eyes that Ranko can't decipher, while Daisuke laughs softly. A few of the other girls mutter something about marking territory, which passes right over Ranko's head.

Thankfully they move away slightly and Ranko relaxes a little. "Th-thank you." She says. Everyone looks at her and Yuka sighs.

"Sorry, Ranko-san, I guess we weren't looking."

"'Kay." Ranko mumbles, still red.

The teacher comes in for the next class and everyone settles down again. Ranko sighs in relief.

When the bell for lunch time rings, she remembers the bentou in her bag and pulls out the box, looking at the cute design on the top before standing, then leaving the room before anyone can grab her.

She needs to be alone. Not alone with other people around her, just alone. Her mind is running a mile a minute and she just needs to get away.

She finds a secluded spot under a tree outside and opens the bentou, finding a pair of chopsticks embedded in the lid.

Inside is a set of all of her favourites, cooked to perfection, including a separated section with dessert. She should have realised that the box from a goddess would be done perfectly, and as she eats it almost helps her feel a little better.

Not very far away, under their usual tree, Akane, Sayuri and Yuka watch the lone redhead eat her lunch daintily. Sayuri whistles to herself. "We sure bagged a cutie in our class." She says. Yuka turns to her.

"Thinking of abandoning me, dear?" She asks. Sayuri grins.

"She's cute, hot and seems really sweet. Maybe."

"What do I need to do to convince you, o girlfriend mine?"

"Ah, nothing you aren't already. Besides, I think our dear Akane-chan here has staked her claim already. So bold!" Yuka laughs as Akane goes red.

"Well, she is exactly my type." Akane says. "And it's weird, I feel like I… I don't know. She seems oddly familiar and yet she's a stranger."

Sayuri taps her chin. "Yeah, there is that. It's a weird feeling. When she was stood up in front of the class, it was as if a hole in the world had been filled somehow."

"Filling holes, huh?" Yuka grins. Sayuri blushes and swats her girlfriend.

"Quiet you."

Akane shakes her head. "I don't know. It's odd. Does she seem… lonely to you?"

"A bit, but not? I don't know, there's something up with her. She's definitely sad somehow."

Akane ponders a moment. "Her uniform's a bit uh… threadbare. You don't think she's an orphan or something, especially with no name?"

"Why?" Sayuri teases. "Thinking of taking her home?"

"Nah. Better make friends with her first. We'll get her sitting with us sometime tomorrow for lunch?"

"Making moves already, you go girl!" Yuka nudges her short-haired friend and Akane blushes.

"It's not like that!" She stares as her two best friends fall back against the tree laughing.

"You're too easy sometimes, Akane!" Yuka laughs. "But you already got a crush!"

Sayuri smiles as she actually starts eating her food. "I dunno, she seems sweet. And she is definitely attractive. You needed a mop to wipe up the drool when she stood there. That hair, those eyes." Her eyebrows waggled and she made an hourglass shape with her hands. "That figure. Mmmph!"

"Pervert." Akane says fondly.

"Hey, I know what we all like." Sayuri says as Yuka kisses her cheek. Akane laughs suddenly. "What?"

"Nothing much." The short-haired girl says, "Just that ever since I came out to her Mom's stopped pestering me about bringing a nice boy home."

"Oh? Winner! Mine's like 'Are you sure Yuka's the girl?', like I'm S-class or something." Sayuri groans. Akane laughs again.

"No, no, you guys aren't getting it, now she's pestering me about bringing a nice girl home instead!"

Yuka falls down laughing. "Oh kami, only you, Akane! Only you!"

Sayuri snickers. "Take Ranko-san home, I guarantee your she'll be smitten and mother her relentlessly. Your mom's like that. Oh hell, get her and your oldest sister in the same room with her and you might as well go to Setagaya for the certificate now!"

Akane blushes brightly. "Shut up, you two!" She yells, though she's smiling.

Ranko, sat beneath her own tree, watches the trio surreptitiously, having eaten her bentou and quieted the rumbling of her stomach. The three are arguing and teasing one another as always, but Akane is definitely far less defensive and… well, more alive than she had been. She can't even see that constant tenseness to her shoulders.

Ranko looks down at her hands, then back to her friend.

No, no longer her friend. Just some girl she knows at school now. A girl who helped her, who would always help her because it's Akane and if she had something that would save her life that someone else needed, she'd give it away.

Maybe coming to school was a mistake, but she had to see, had to know if it worked.

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School passes by and as the final bell for the day rings and the rest of the class files out slowly, some stopping by her desk to welcome her, she looks up into Akane's face. "O-oh… Tendou-san." She says.

"Hey there, Ranko-san, I hope your first day was good?"

"I-it was fine. Thank you for your assistance earlier." Ranko says softly, looking at her desk.

"Ah, it's fine." Akane cracks her knuckles a bit. She brightens. "Hey! Was Kunou-senpai right earlier?" Ranko gives her a confused look. "He said you were a martial artist. Are you?"

Ranko looks down at her desk again. "O-oh. Sort-of." She says.

"'Sort-of'? What do you mean?"

"I don't like to fight, I can just about spar, but I was trained. I just don't like violence." Ranko says.

Akane nods. "Ah, I get you. I still like to fight; it's why I have my spars every morning. I'll tell you about them sometime. The only bad part of them is Kunou-senpai at the end, but he's just an idiot and a creep, and not really worth bothering over. If he bugs you too much, speak to me or Nabiki and we'll take care of it."

Ranko smiles her first really genuine smile at seeing Akane still so caring. "Thank you, Tendou-san."

Akane blushes. Great kami above that smile has some wattage to it. She tries not to let it make her knees weak. Why does this new girl have this effect? She's not that hard-up for dates even being a lesbian. There's just something odd, and familiar about Ranko and she can't really put her finger on it.

After a moment, she coughs. "Well, I'd better get home or Mom will tell me off again for dilly-dallying."

Ranko perks up. "Your Mother? Is she nice?" Akane gives her a funny look, but then grins.

"Oh yeah, my Mom's awesome." Akane says. "Supportive and just great. My dad, too. Hey!" She brightens, that sure, confident smile on her face that makes Ranko blush back again. "You should stop by sometime and have a spar, we've got a dojo and everything."

Ranko makes a thoughtful face. "I suppose I could sometime." She mumbles. Akane grins.

"Cool, it's a date!" She stops. "Ah… not that it's a date-date but a date to mark on your… I'm shutting up now."

Ranko's face is red, but she nods. "O-okay."

"Well, I'll see you tomorrow." Akane says awkwardly, then walks out the room. Ranko sighs softly.

This is far, far harder than she'd thought.

"Time to… go…. Home…" She mutters to herself, slowly realising. She doesn't have a home.

Standing, numbly, she walks out of the school, her mind awhirl. Where is she going to stay?

Fetching the pack from where she'd stashed it away, hidden, she just… wanders around Nerima. Taking in sights and sounds familiar and unfamiliar. She walks past the Nekohanten, which is still there for some reason. Why are Cologne and Shampoo here if she isn't?

She almost goes in, but stops herself. She hasn't any money.

Ucchan's isn't even open, it's still an empty restaurant with a 'For Sale' sign on it. Wandering further, she realises her feet have taken her to the street that the Tendou Dojo is on. She looks at the familiar sign stating 'To challenge the owner in ferocious combat, please use rear entrance'.

Looking at the familiar walls, with the house behind it, a twinge of fear rises in her, a momentary greying of the world at what to expect inside.

Except…

Except it's not the same. It won't ever be the same.

Hanging her head, Ranko walks on, looking for the canal. There was that bridge she or Akane would sit under if needed.

As if on cue it starts to rain and Ranko sighs as she darts towards the bridge.

The stones aren't comfortable, and there's not much room, but she manages to at least find somewhere dry. She pauses a moment. She should change from her uniform.

Blushing brightly, she looks around. There's no one there, so she uses her speed to change from her uniform into the overalls and blouse, folding the uniform up.

Finally having a moment to check through the backpack she'd been given she notes that there's an umbrella inside it (that would have been useful to have known about five minutes ago). As well as this there's a small lamp, a bedroll, a blanket. She looks deeper and pulls out a photo wallet.

Opening it, she looks at the photographs. A mixture of old and newer ones – except the older ones aren't of her old self, of Ranma. It's like Berry had taken the album and modified every picture of Ranma to contain Ranko instead.

She idly flips through it. There aren't that many pictures – Ranma wasn't entirely a sentimental boy, so rarely asked to keep photos. There's one of her on Akane's lap in the neko-ken. One of her, Father and the Tendou family. She's in the lovely Chinese outfit Shampoo had given her, pale yellow with an orchid pattern.

The last few she stares at hungrily. Pictures of recently. One of her with flowers, one helping Kasumi-nee-chan, and several of her, and her mother, and Ucchan, and Shampoo and Ryouga.

Her heart twists, but she forces it down.

There's the pyjamas her mother gave her, her favourite pair in the whole world.

She pulls the pyjamas out of her bag and looks at them. Someone's carefully put them in a plastic wrapper. She takes them out and smells them.

They're clean; cleaned using the detergent her mother uses, the smell of the fabric softener reminding her so much of Nodoka that it's painful.

She's afraid to go and see her mother. She's afraid of what she'll find. As sure as she is that when she gets there, Nodoka will remember her, will know her. Maybe she'll know her even if she doesn't remember her, recognise her as her daughter.

Putting the pyjamas back into the plastic, Ranko repacks the bag, but holds onto the pyjamas in their wrapping. She clutches them against her chest as she curls up on the stone shelf above the dirt path, under the canal bridge and begins to cry.

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"Hey Mom." Akane smiles as she walks into the kitchen at home.

"Akane, dear, hello!" Kimiko beams at her youngest daughter. "How was school?"

"Ah, you know, the usual!" Akane grins, rolling her shoulders. "Fighting idiot senpais, rescuing damsels from said idiot senpais."

"Oh my, sounds a busy day, dear." Kimiko smiles at her. "That Kunou boy again?"

"Yeah." Akane grumbles. "He was picking on this cute redhead transfer student, so I put him in his place and took her in. Turns out she's in my class."

"Oh, cute and with red hair?" Akane goes red and puts a hand to her mouth.

"Mooooooom!" She exclaims. "It's not like that!" She pauses. "Wellll, maybe a little like that. She's very nice, Mom, and she's got this beautiful red hair."

Kimiko's eyes twinkle. "Well, you know I'd love for you to bring a nice girl home sometime."

"Uuuugh this is why I don't talk to you about school." Akane grouses, not entirely bad-naturedly. Her mother pats her on the arm.

"Whatever you say, dear. Looks like it's a concrete day, right?"

Akane rolls her shoulders. "Yeah, I'll get my gi and smash some blocks. Got a little frustration to vent."

"Dinner won't be long, so do build up that appetite."

Nabiki leans against the wall of the dojo as Akane breaks bricks in it. Thankfully the last of the classes had finished for the day while she was talking to the new student, so she's not interrupted until Nabiki clears her throat while Akane clears the broken blocks away, a broad smile on her face.

"So what's she like?"

"Who?" Akane asks, wiping her forehead.

"The new girl. You seem pretty smitten." Nabiki drawls, a smirk on her face. "And here I thought you'd be pining for Misato in my class all this time."

"Nah, she's way out of my league." Akane shrugs at her sister.

"And that new girl isn't? Half the rumour mill's going already. Not surprising, with that red hair and that figure, but still..."

Akane shrugs. "She's nice. Very shy, and yes dear onee-chan, very attractive. Happy?"

Nabiki grins. "Very. Just… get to know her before you confess, alright?"

"Nabiki, I'm a lesbian, not an idiot. I know how relationships work."

"Yeah well, with your bull-headed tendencies I figured it's best to give you advice before you go making a fool of yourself." Nabiki pauses a moment. "Hey, did you get this weird… look and feeling from her?"

Akane's eyes snap to her older sister. "How do you mean?"

"Like she's… familiar. But I can honestly say I've never met her before in my life. But it's like there was a… hole, in the world, that she's filled."

Akane 'hmm's. "You know, you're right. Sayuri said the same thing."

"Weird. I think I'll try to dig up some stuff. She have a family name?"

"Not one, though I did hear 'Saotome' or 'Himura' when she was meeting the secretary, but she said they weren't likely her names. I think she might be an orphan or disowned or something. Which is weird, I can't see someone so polite being disowned."

Nabiki shrugs. "I'll try to find some stuff out. Can't have just popped into existence after all."

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And so begins the downward spiral. At least Akane's having fun?

One of the themes I'm exploring with this, as opposed to Changeling's initial themes on transition which change to exploring love, loss, anger and grief, is how self-destructive people can be, especially when someone has self-worth as low as Ranko's.

Ranko shares that low self-worth with me so I can absolutely understand how she can absolutely despise herself and consider herself unimportant. I don't think I'd ever be able to go as far as she has in Athetos but she made a snap decision. A bad one, but one that makes sense to her. And that's the problem, everything that's happening is her own decision biting her, her own fault in a way.

I wanted to explore that sort of thing taken to the extreme which is where Athetos was born.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 4 - Fracturing

Who is the man I see,
Where I'm supposed to be?
I lost my heart,
I buried it too deep,
Under the iron sea.

Oh, crystal ball, crystal ball,
Save us all,
Tell me life is beautiful,
Mirror, mirror on the wall.

- Crystal Ball by Keane

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Ranko wakes on the next day aching and sore. Her hip had been on a stone all night after she'd cried herself to sleep holding the package with the pyjamas she'd been given by her mother.

She looks around, the grey haze of morning twilight near a body of water and she stretches.

Her stomach growls. She ignores it and gets onto her feet, wondering what the time is.

Walking out from under the bridge, she sees a figure in red shorts and a yellow tank top jog by, short hair bouncing. Akane.

She shakes her head and moves away, keeping out of sight. She looks around for somewhere to change now it's not night, hefting her pack.

She finds a train station and spends a short amount of time in the bathroom, trying to wash herself and changing into her uniform.

It's not the first time she's been without a home. In fact, as far back as she can remember in Ranma's memories, the only homes she ever had were the Tendou dojo and her mother's home. But she's not Ranma. She has his skills, but this is a different environment to those camping trips. There isn't exactly a technique scroll on urban homelessness she can read.

She pauses. Well, there might be, given the craziness of her life before a few weeks ago.

Shaking her head, she splashes her face and picks up her pack, leaving the bathroom and walking towards school.

The day passes uneventfully; or as uneventfully as it can, given she feels like her entire being is starting to show hairline cracks. Akane invites her to sit for lunch with her and her friends first thing, but she declines, not feeling worth it.

Instead she sits where she had before, simply observing. She notes how close Yuka and Sayuri sit, and one time observes them kissing.

Had they been a couple in her old life? She'd never bothered to find out as Ranma, that sort of thing hadn't interested him.

Akane seems vibrant still, and seems so, so set on befriending Ranko. She keeps trying to hold the short-haired girl at arms' length but it's so hard. She always had a hard time saying no to Akane, even as Ranma, and especially now.

Sometimes she thinks back to the Akane she held the night before last, the last night she spent in a bed. She remembers holding someone who had deep, deep scars, a depression that caused her to lash out. Seeing Akane so calm and collected, and sure, bad-tempered, but happy is a combination balm and vice around her heart.

Everyone seems so much better now she's gone, like her presence was something that dragged down the world, like she was the catalyst to everyone's pain. She keeps hearing about how Nabiki has helped this girl or that girl, like some kind of gossip queen using her words to keep the peace. How Akane spars in a morning with the group of boys who aren't yelling for a date but simply enjoying a morning spar with a friend.

Most surprising is how many friends Akane now has among the male student body. Maybe not as good friends as she is with Sayuri and Yuka, but more than just scathing anger at them – she'll joke with them, talk with them, laugh with them.

Ranko's envious of how easy it seems for Akane to befriend people. Most outside of her class are avoiding her, and she can hear whispers when she walks, as if she's some kind of oddity to be discussed.

It's like there's an aura she's putting out that puts people off that hadn't really known her before. Thankfully her own class aren't a problem with it, they seem to settle in with her there very easily. Almost spookily so, but she can't really focus.

She tries to take notes in class, but her stomach knots again, the gnawing ache in her stomach growing stronger a moment before subsiding. Ranko grits her teeth.

So she sits here beneath this tree, alone, and contemplates the decision that led her to be alone. Maybe she deserves this.

Akane, sitting with Sayuri and Yuka in their customary place, gazes at the redheaded girl currently lost in thought. "Have you guys seen her eat today?" She asks.

Yuka shakes her head. "Nope, she's been sat under that tree staring the entire time. It'd be kind of creepy if she didn't look so… lost."

"She had that fancy bentou box yesterday, though…" Akane mumbles. "Personalised and everything…"

Sayuri shrugs. "She hasn't got it today, maybe she forgot it?"

"Must be it." Akane stands and brushes her skirts of.

"Where are you going?"

"I've got half my food left, no sense letting someone go hungry." Akane says, her cheeks tinged slightly red.

"Stars above you're moving fast. Second day of knowing her and already indirect kisses." Yuka teases. Then she goes serious. "Open up your bentou."

Akane does so and Yuka deposits two tamagoyaki in there. Sayuri puts in some pickled daikon and nods. "Go get 'er, 'Fierce Tigress'!"

Akane glowers at her friends for using Kunou's name for her and stomps off, muttering, towards Ranko.

"Hey Ranko-san." Akane's voice drops Ranko out of her miserable spiral of thought and she looks up. Akane stands over her, smiling brightly. Ranko blushes and looks down.

"H-hello T-Tendou-san." Ranko says softly, playing with her fingers. "W-was I bothering y-you? I was thinking so I d-don't know if I w-w-was staring…"

"It's fine. Hey, come join us. And here." Akane pushes her half-full bentou into Ranko's hands as the girl stands. "We saw you weren't eating, I guess you forgot your own bentou?"

Ranko looks down at the box, then back up. "I-I couldn't p-possibly…"

"Yes you can, it'd have only gone to waste. Come on." Akane idly brushes some of her short hair behind her ears and Ranko's eyes linger on the movement before the taller girl turns and walks back to her friends, Ranko meekly following.

Akane sits back down and both Yuka and Sayuri smile at her. "Hey there, Ranko-san, thank you for joining us."

"'Kay." Ranko says, looking down at the box in her hands. Her stomach growls, the gnawing ache in her stomach growing more painful.

"Well come on, eat up!" Akane says, nudging her playfully.

Ranko pulls her chopsticks from her bag (thankfully not in the bentou box that's in her backpack) and opens. She takes a bite of the food.

Kasumi's cooking. She can tell immediately that the rice is just that, though there's something slightly different about other parts of it. She eats daintily as the three friends watch her.

A tear splashes onto the box. Then another.

"Woah, hey!" Akane says, concerned as tears start pouring from Ranko's eyes as she swallows her first mouthful and starts on the tamagoyaki. "Hey, Ranko-san are you okay?"

More tears falling, and the redhead's breath hiccups as she tries to eat.

It's only when she's done and swallowed the last of the food that the sobbing starts.

Akane looked between her friends, watching Yuka point at Ranko and mime moving closer.

Akane scoots closer and puts and arm around Ranko, just listening to the girl cry. She's not crying noisily, it's quiet and soft, and Akane feels how cold the girl is. She circles Ranko in her arms as the girl cries into her blouse, making soothing noises and rubbing her back.

As Ranko is winding down, Akane takes her hands away and looks at the distraught redhead. "Are you alright?"

Ranko sits up, wiping her eyes and nods morosely.

"You know you can talk to us if you need to, Ranko-san." Yuka says, concern in her eyes. Ranko seems to be doing some kind of meditation as her eyes close and she mumbles something about ice to herself.

Ranko shakes her head. "It's p-private. I wis-" That word now has horrible connotations, "I would l-like to, but I c-can't."

Akane sighs and takes her bentou box. "Well at least we stopped that stomach growling." She says, grinning at Ranko and trying to lighten the mood.

The lost, forlorn look is back in Ranko's eyes as she bows to Akane. "Thank you, Tendou-san, for your kindness, and you too Tamaki-san and Nakano-san."

"Don't sweat it. And you can call me Akane." Akane says, smiling warmly at Ranko.

"Sayuri."

"Yuka."

Ranko nods, then stands. "I'm going to the bathroom to freshen up before class. Thank you for your kindness."

The three watch her go.

"What was all that about?" Sayuri wonders, her friends nodding along.

"I don't know." Akane replies. "But something's very fishy about Ranko-san. Maybe not her herself, but something about her circumstances…" She thinks a moment. "Something's off, I can feel it."

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After school on the third day is when she sees Ryouga. He's sweeping the front of the Nekohanten, surprisingly enough, and looks up at her as she passes. Again, she feels that disconnect, that jolt in her heart that's like a spike running right into it. He gives her a bashful look she recognises as him seeing a girl he doesn't know.

Ranko keeps her face carefully neutral. Soul of Ice. She can't give it away. She's getting a lot of practice doing this now, having to spend time in Fuurinkan. She wonders for a moment why the café is here, why Cologne is here.

She gets her answer when Shampoo emerges onto the front of the front of the restaurant and promptly takes Ryouga in her arms for a kiss. Ranko feels her heart quicken and another nail drive through as she watches the two, obviously in love, interact with smiles and a care she wished she'd been able to have before she made this stupid wish.

She's even more shocked when Mousse steps out and is promptly kissed by the two, the three then standing together, looking out on the street before breaking up with lingering touches and cleaning the rest of the frontage.

Her heart jolts. They seem so happy. Another showing of her being gone making things better, not just the Tendou family.

Having seen that display, Ranko moves on, ignoring the growing ache in her stomach. Akane's half-finished bentou seems so long ago, but it's only been a day. Today she spent lunch taking advantage of the empty changing room to have a shower. She'd tied her hair back up in the old pigtail to hide how wet it was, but she'd been pretty sure Akane had noticed.

She'd forgotten how hunger felt, gnawing at her insides. Her time on the road with Genma had certainly included times where she'd gone hungry, either on purpose by Genma stealing her food or by virtue of them simply having none to eat.

Maybe she could work somewhere – she'd say the Nekohanten but she's not sure how she'd take it, and she hasn't yet seen Ucchan's. Everywhere she's asked wanted ID, which she doesn't have. And those that didn't treated her… oddly. As if she doesn't quite work with the world – the same way some treated her at school.

Sighing softly, Ranko resigns herself to another night of studying her textbooks with the small lamp that somehow never runs out of power that Berry had given her, while trying to ignore the ache in her belly.

She makes her way to the vacant lot that Ryouga used to pitch his tent in. She'd been staying there on the bench, hoping to run into him – even as strangers, she knows he's kind enough to speak to her at least.

Now that dream is dashed, too.

Plip. Plip. She opens her eyes to see that the heavens are opening up; rain starting to pour down.

Ranko staggers as it hits her and she digs at her pack for the umbrella, sitting on the bench under it, knees to her chest, trying to minimize her exposure. The rain is cold, even though it's late summer and her blouse was already soaking before she'd managed to put the umbrella up.

She feels like someone's scooped out her insides, hollowed her out. The gnawing, biting ache in her stomach is insistent. For a moment she considers emulating her father before feeling disgusted with herself. Thievery is not something she will ever do again willingly.

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Akane takes her Ranko-watching to a new level over the next few days. She tries to get the red-haired girl to open up to her, but she remains stubbornly shy despite Akane, Yuka and Sayuri's best efforts. Some days Ranko comes with them for lunch, but most of the time she disappears.

On the days she joins them, she doesn't eat with them, claiming with an embarrassed face and a wave of her empty bentou box that she'd been too hungry to wait for lunch. Once or twice she forgets her bentou, but she won't take much food from her friends, if any, or she'll tell them after they've eaten their dinner already.

Akane's concern grows as Ranko seems to be more listless and depressed as each day passes. There's a pervasive air about the girl, an aura of depression chi she can feel thick in the air. Most days now, the red-haired girl seems hardly able to focus in class, and she keeps closing her eyes for a moment or swaying as if dizzy.

Akane keeps a watch out when it comes to the changing rooms. Ranko, timid as she's been, seems almost to shuffle into the changing rooms. So, she was embarrassed to be changing with other girls. Pretty standard for someone like Ranko as she'd so far gotten to know the new girl. Quiet and shy, but she could tell under there was a core of steel. She spoke properly, politely, and never raised her voice. She half expects to hear 'gokigenyou' as a greeting.

No, wait, she has heard the girl saying it. How someone who speaks like a Meiji-era princess wears such ragged clothing is beyond her. How such a polite young girl can seem so hurt but keep it all going.

Most days Ranko changes in the bathrooms away, but Akane and her friends had all but surrounded her as they made their way, chattering, to the changing room for gym class.

An eyebrow raises when Ranko finally deigns to change. Her PE uniform is slightly stained and patched, somewhat threadbare, but while she's changing, Akane can see bruises and the girl's ribs are showing. She's painfully thin. Her hip bones show, even. Akane's mouth flattens into a line.

Forgot her bentou indeed! The girl looked like she hadn't had a good meal for some time. And those bruises and scrapes – they looked like they were fading more quickly than most people's would, but from a fight perhaps? There are some she'd swear were caused by a blunt instrument, a mallet like her chi one, perhaps, but the really nasty ones are on her left side. It's like she was slammed against something hard.

The bruises look a few weeks old but even so, they must have been really horrible when she first had them. No wonder Ranko had been changing in the bathrooms.

Akane's not the only one to notice the bruises and a few of the other girls crowd her. She refuses to talk about them, biting her lip and shaking her head.

After gym, Akane tells her friends she'll see them tomorrow and seeks her older sister out. "Nabiki, we need to talk." She says.

Nabiki nods and steps out of her classroom after picking all her stuff up, falling into step with her little sister. "What's up?"

"Ranko." Akane replies quietly. "I'm really concerned, onee-chan."

"Oh? Your crush not working out?"

"Nabiki." Akane's voice is calm and cold. "Not now, this is serious."

Nabiki shuts up and nods. "Alright, what's going on?"

"I think… I don't know for sure, but I think she's abused." Akane bites her lip. "Or something. She has some really nasty bruising on both sides of her body. One side looks like she took one heck of a tumble into something unyielding and I can see them stemming from an accident, but the others look like… I don't know, blunt object trauma."

Nabiki looks sharply at her sister. "Why hasn't anyone said anything until now?" She asks. "I could have started an investigation before now."

"She's been changing in the bathrooms. I thought it was because she's shy, but it's more than that. And her ribs, onee-chan. She's so thin. It's like she's not eaten properly in a week or so. It's hard to tell how long. She's definitely a martial artist, and you know how we eat."

"No kidding." Nabiki teases her sister often for her appetite. "Shit. We failed a girl. Sorry, imouto-chan, I failed your new girlfriend."

Akane shakes her head, ignoring the girlfriend comment. "No, I wasn't paying attention. She'll wave her bentou box at us and say she ate earlier, but she was probably lying. I wonder if her family's starving her?"

Nabiki purses her lips and looks angry. "I think I'll have to investigate our girl's home-life." She mutters. "And find a bit more our about her family and circumstances. She still doesn't have a family name?"

"Not that I know of." Akane says softly.

"I'll look out, try to get her birthdate and where she was born."

Akane shrugs. "Oh sure, that won't give me away."

Nabiki ponders. "Ask her on a date." She advises and Akane goes red.

"Nabiki! Don't tease me."

"I'm not." Her sister says, bringing Akane up short. "I'm serious. You like her. I know you do, she's triggered that protecting people thing that had you going out with Arisa for a few months, remember?"

"…Yeah, then she dumped be for being 'both too much a tomboy and too girly at the same time', like I have to be either butch or femme, and not my own person, honestly." Akane mutters. "Bitch."

Nabiki pats her arm. "At least you didn't propose or anything. I could've told you she was a shallow one. But sometimes learning your own lessons is important, ne?" Akane nods. "Ask her out, Akane. The worst she can do is say no."

"I'll think about it." Akane says softly, twiddling her fingers together. "Why are you wanting me to?"

Nabiki shrugs. "I can follow her home after and find out where she lives. Step one to investigating her is finding out her home address."

Akane sighs. "I'll think about it." She repeats.

The next day, Akane's earlier than she has been for a long time, and yet Ranko's still there as if she'd either slept at her desk or not at all. She has dark circles under her eyes and seems more listless than she had been. Something hollow lurks in those blue eyes and Akane swallows on seeing a momentary pit of hopeless darkness opening up inside them, before Ranko seems to realise she's there and schools her expression.

I wish I could help you. Talk to me. Akane thinks, but she puts a smile on for the petite girl and pulls a few volumes of manga from her bag. "Ne, Ranko-san, I wondered if you'd like to read this." She puts them down, showing the covers to the first three 'Maria-sama ga miteru' volumes. Having spoken to Ranko and coaxing some interests out, she knows that Ranko wants to emulate some genteel and polite lady she looks up to. "It's about a school where girls learn how to be proper ladies, I thought it might be up your street."

Ranko perks up a moment, looking on the covers and looking at the first few pages describing Lillian. She smiles softly. "I couldn't possibly…"

Akane smiles as she sits at her own desk, leaving the manga there. "Ah, feel free, Ranko-san. They're a good story and I think you'll like them, as well as the friendships."

Ranko shrugs and takes them, putting them in her book bag. She'll try to take good care of them. "Thank you, Akane-san." She says politely.

Akane gives her one of those self-assured grins that reminds Ranko so much of her older self. Something flutters in her chest, but she ruthlessly crushes it down. "Ah, Ranko-san, I think you'll probably find yourself greeting everyone with 'gokigenyou' all the time rather than some of the time." The short-haired girl teases.

Ranko blushes but manages a giggle and Akane considers it a victory.

At least until she tells her best friends about it at lunch, Ranko having claimed to have food already and needing to catch up on homework.

"You loaned your female crush your favourite sort-of shoujo-ai manga series to read at school." Yuka states flatly. "Really, Akane? You don't even know if she likes girls!"

"You don't know if she likes boys!" Akane retorts. "Besides, she's always blushing and stammering near me, and I don't see her doing that to anyone else!"

"Kami above Akane, you are such a disaster lesbian." Sayuri mutters.

"I am not!" Akane says hotly. "Just because I get all hot and b-b-bothered and…"

"Keep digging, girlfriend." Yuka grins. "And maybe just ask her on a date."

"Nabiki asked me to do so too, but it seems kind of… I don't want to force it." Akane mumbles.

Sayuri shrugs. "If your big sis has a plan to help, that's obviously step one. Give her a day or two to percolate with Marimite and then spring the question if she seems like she liked the romantic friendships. Then bam! 'Ranko-chan I want your body please give me wild lesbian sex!'"

Yuka swats her girlfriend. "What Sayuri is saying," She says to their blushing and stammering friend, "Is to ask her in a day or two. Worst she can do is say no."

Akane sighs. "Alright."

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 5 - Untouchable

And I feel like I knew you before
And I guess that you can hear me through this song
And my love will never die
And my feelings will always shine

- Untouchable by Anathema

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Kimiko smiles at her youngest daughter as she walks into the kitchen with a pensive expression. "Hey mom." Akane says, brushing her short hair behind her ear. "Can we talk?"

Kimiko finishes washing the dishes from dinner and wipes her hands on a towel, then removes her apron. "Of course, dear. Must be serious!"

Akane nods and Kimiko makes some tea and follows Akane to the engawa overlooking the koi pond, kneeling next to her daughter as the short-haired girl sighs and sits. "What's up, dear?"

Akane looks at her mother and shrugs. "There's a girl…"

"Oh, this 'Ranko' that Nabiki was speaking about?"

"That's the one."

"You like her?" Kimiko asks, smiling gently.

"I um… yeah." Akane admits, face flushed. "I've barely known her a week but there's this… weird… connection." She shrugs. "I don't know, but she's nice. And she's really shy. And, Mom, she's beautiful. She's got a lovely face and her hair is a gorgeous shade of red I didn't know was natural but it is." Her blush grows more pronounced.

Kimiko laughs gently. "You sound smitten, Akane."

"I guess I am. I'm also just… worried."

"Worried?"

"I… think she's being abused. Or starved. Or both. She hardly eats anything at school, and that's usually something from a vending machine that's cheap or stuff I, Yuka or Sayuri give her from our own bentou. She keeps claiming to eat it before lunch or forgetting it but I think she's lying for some reason."

Kimiko purses her lips. "That doesn't sound good."

"She's covered in bruises and some sores too." Akane says, fists bunching her skirt. "Some really, really bad ones. I just… I'm worried, Mom. I don't want her being hurt."

Kimiko pats her daughter's hand as she sips her tea, watching the koi jump. "Be her friend, Akane. And more if she's interested. And if she is or isn't, you know the duty of a martial artist."

"To protect those weaker than ourselves." Akane says softly. "Yeah." She kisses Kimiko on the cheek. "Thanks, Mom. I just needed the perspective."

"You're a good girl, Akane. You always have been." Kimiko murmurs. "I've always been proud of you. Of all three of you, really. But you embody what a martial artist should be."

Akane blushes but smiles at her mother. "…Thanks, Mom."

"I'd say it was all me and your father, but your auntie deserves some of the credit."

"When is Auntie coming back?"

"Right now, actually." Himura Nodoka says behind the two, and they turn. She's in a sharp business suit, flatteringly cut, her auburn hair in a stylish plaited bun held up with sticks. She smiles warmly at the two. "I suppose you didn't hear me come in."

"You suppose right, No-chan. Welcome home!" Kimiko says warmly. "Sit yourself down and have some tea a moment. I was just discussing my daughter's new girlfriend prospect with her."

"Moooooom!" Akane whines as Nodoka laughs gently.

"My, my, Akane-chan, another one?"

"What do you mean 'another one', Auntie? The last one was Arisa and that was months ago!"

Kimiko laughs as Nodoka shakes her head, sipping at her tea. "Oh, you are easy to tease, dear." Nodoka titters. "But please, tell me about this girl of yours. I hope she's worthy of my niece." Akane describes her new friend-stroke-crush to Nodoka and the genteel woman smiles. "Well, well, I think your mother's right, you are smitten."

"I… y—yeah… I suppose."

"You'll have to ask her out tomorrow I think." Nodoka says, eyes twinkling. "But I do have a suggestion."

"What's that, Auntie?"

"Feed her."

"Feed her?"

"Yes. You mentioned she might be lying about having brought or eaten lunch? The simplest answer is to bring her a lunch yourself. That way, even if you do not date she has something to eat. And then perhaps share the food between all four of you if you sit with your two friends."

Kimiko nods. "No-chan is right, Akane dear. Friends don't let friends go hungry. And try to get her back here sometime, I'd quite like to meet a girl who can captivate you so in such a short time."

Akane blushes beet red and looks at the floor. "Alright… Though can you help me, Mom, Auntie?"

"Certainly, dear." Nodoka says, finishing her tea and standing. "Please let me change into my house clothes first."

"I'll run a bath for you, Auntie." Akane says, standing herself. She leans up and kisses the auburn-haired woman's cheek. "Welcome home!"

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Ranko wakes on the bench, the umbrella no longer over her and her overalls still damp. Her head feels scratchy inside and the gnawing ache of her hunger is starting to really take its toll on her. When was the last time she ate?

She thinks she had a croquette and a tamagoyaki a day or two ago, but it's a bit hazy.

Sitting up on the bench, she looks around and spots a familiar face walking around the park with a half-and-half dog. Shirokuro seems at least happy, and Ryouga has a dreamy half-smile on his face. Ranko looks down and kicks her feet. Another one happier without her. She'd hoped, somehow, that he'd be wandering and maybe, just maybe they could meet here and share the tent and make friends and then travel together.

What a vain, pointless hope, just like her life has become. What's even the point in trying anymore?

Shaking her head to clear the thoughts before they spiral, she stands on wobbly feet and makes her way to one of the train station restrooms to change into her school uniform and freshen her face.

On the floor she finds some coins and after looking around to check that no one else nearby had dropped them, she picks them up and counts them. Enough for some melon bread from the vending machine, at least. She can quell some of the tearing ache in her stomach for an hour or two at least.

She shudders to think of how much weight she's lost. The overalls don't fit quite properly anymore and she has to tie the ankles off tighter each day.

Sighing, she emerges from the bathroom and trudges to school, noting that since she's very early she can wash herself and her clothes in the locker room. Thank goodness for the Saotome Clothes Drying Technique, she ponders a moment, a rare (nowadays) smile flitting on and off her face.

Having taken the time to do so, though the hem of her dress is still wet, Ranko feels a little fresher, though it can't really compare to a nice soak in a furo. Or a bed. Or a meal. Or having a world that isn't a living nightmare come true where no one knows you and all you want to do is go home, but home doesn't exist anymore and…

The world greys as she leans against the wall, panting. She'd been having these attacks when her thoughts and emotions ran too long for a day or two now and they were already the most annoying thing ever. Straightening up, she makes her way to the classroom and sits down, pulling out her homework and starting to work on it.

The pages are a little damp, still, it looks like the pack isn't entirely waterproof. Still, the work is still legible, and she'll be damned if she lets her schooling slip while she's here.

"Oh, hey there Ranko-san."

Ranko looks up to see Akane and she schools her expression into a smile from the frown she's constantly had these past days. "Hello, Akane-san." She says softly.

"Early as always, I see." Akane says, sitting down and turning around on her chair, lounging back with one leg crossed over the other. Ranko's eyes travel along her exposed legs, toned and firm and- focus.

"Of course." Ranko says primly. "I thought you were still sparring in a morning?"

"I asked the guys to lay off a few days, get some rest. Got awful close to really hurting a couple the other day when they got slow so figured it's best let them have a break. And Kunou isn't here at this time. I'd bet that's partly why you're always early?"

"Partly." Ranko replies, noncommittal in tone. It wasn't, but it makes a good excuse. She doesn't want to have to hurt the boy, but she has a feeling that at some point push will come to shove and she'll have to demonstrate her considerable talent. At which point she might end up with a hentai horde all her own.

"Hey Ranko-san?" Akane sounds nervous, and Ranko looks over to see her looking unsure, and a little more like the Akane she knew before this nightmare began. "How are you f-finding Marimite?"

"Mari- oh, that manga?" Ranko smiles. "It's very nice. I like the romantic undertones."

"Oh, you picked up on those?"

Ranko actually giggles, a little red. "Of course. They're very sweet. I like Sei."

"Huh, I'd have thought you'd prefer Yumi or Shimako." Akane muses. Ranko shrugs.

"I um, I like people who are confident and strong. And she reminds me of… someone I used to know. My brother, I suppose."

Akane homes in on the tidbit of information. Ranko rarely surrenders such personal things. "Your brother?"

Ranko looks sad. "Y-yes. He's gone now." She mumbles, looking down.

"Oh, I'm so sorry, Ranko-san, I didn't mean to make you…"

"No, it's alright. I'm getting used to it. Actually, you remind me of him a bit, Akane-san. And I think you'd have liked him." She smiles.

Akane laughs. "Maybe, but only ever as a friend, Ranko-san."

"Why is that?"

"You haven't realised?" Ranko shakes her head and Akane laughs. "Wow, you're kind of oblivious, Ranko-san. I'm gay." Akane giggles. "So are Sayuri and Yuka, though I know you've seen those two being all kissyface."

Ranko blushes. "Oh, I see." She smiles. "I'm glad you're confident enough in yourself to be able to tell everyone."

Akane grins. "No point in lying, even if Mom insists on me bringing a nice girl home sometime to meet her." She laughs. "Anyway, that's why I wouldn't want your brother as anything more than a friend. He sounds nice though."

Ranko shifts. "Yes, I still miss him. Spending time with you is nice, it reminds me of being h- with him."

Akane raises an eyebrow. "Not too much I hope?"

"Oh no, you're very different, Akane-san, in several ways. But you both had this… spark of confidence in yourselves that I can't even begin to touch."

Akane blushes. She clears her throat. A few minutes of awkward silence go by until she breaks it. "Hey uh, R-Ranko-san?" She asks, sounding nervous again. Ranko looks over.

"Yes?"

"Would you like to… go out sometime?"

Ranko blinks. "Ah… Why not? Where to?"

Akane clears her throat again. "I uh… don't mean as friends."

"Not as… Oh." Ranko's eyes go wide. "Ohhhhh. I ah…" She plays with her fingers.

She wants to go on a date? With me? Why? Ranko's mind spins. She's not shy about her feelings. If I were still Ranma, this would be a dream come… But I'm not. But then… Her eyes widen. But then she wouldn't want Ranma, would she? And she's not the Akane I knew, she's… Her cheeks tinge pink. She's beautiful.

Akane sighs. "Never mind. Sorry to have bothered you with silly things…" She says morosely. Ranko shakes her head.

"N-no, I was just… surprised! I um…" She shrugs. "Why not? Certainly, Akane, I could go on a date with you."

Akane's face is a little red, and she smiles. "Great! I uh… tomorrow, perhaps, after school? It's a Saturday after all."

Ranko nods. "Okay. What will we do?"

"Let's… figure out after. We don't need to dress nice, since we'll be in our uniforms so it can be nice and casual. I'd like to get to know you a bit better."

Ranko blushes and nods. "Alright."

Akane grins, some of that self-confidence back now she's pushed past her nervousness. "Awesome. Thank you, Ranko-san. I hope we have a blast!"

Lunch comes soon enough, and Ranko accepts Akane's invitation to sit with her and her friends after she visits the vending machine for the melon bread.

Clutching it like a prize, Ranko soon makes her way to where Akane, Sayuri and Yuka sit, the latter two already engaged in a game of feeding one another.

Akane smiles as Ranko sits down with her usual ladylike precision and unwraps her melon bread. "Is that all you have today, Ranko-san?"

Ranko pauses with the bread halfway to her mouth. "Y-yes. I'm afraid I forgot my bentou again."

Akane doesn't scold her like usual, instead she laughs. "That's becoming a habit." She says, then brings out a box, handing it over. "It's a good thing I can cover you."

Ranko looks at the neatly wrapped box in her hands. "Wh-what?" She asks, looking at it.

"I made you lunch." Akane says, smiling. Ranko's heart quickens. Partly from fear as it's Akane's cooking, and partly through sheer shock of her friend doing this for her. At this point, the biting, clawing ache in her stomach means she'll even eat Akane cooking to stave it off. With relish, even.

Then again… this Akane isn't the same, maybe she's not as bad?

Ranko's eyes fill with tears a moment, and the other three pretend they don't see her wipe her eyes before she opens the box and sees inside. Curry, Akane's curry, the one dish she could always make. Croquettes, tamagoyaki, octopus sausage, rice, pickles. "Thank you." She says softly.

Akane smiles. "Wasn't all me, Yuka and Sayuri'll be the first to tell you I suck at cooking. I can just about make curry without turning it into some kind of radioactive goop."

"Hey, you're getting better!" Yuka admonishes. "It's mostly edible, you just don't think it is!"

"Yeah well, I live with Kasumi, Mom and Auntie. What do you think that's like for confidence in my cooking when I can still burn ramen?"

"That's a good point, you do live with scary good cooks." Yuka mumbles. "How are you so crap at cooking?"

"Beats me." Akane says, picking her chopsticks up and carrying on with her lunch.

Rank starts eating herself, the melon bread already gone. The curry is better than Akane's last one though to Ranko it tastes like the food of all the kami in the heavens. She savours every bite. She picks out the tamagoyaki and other food, noticing a combination of Kasumi and Akane's attempts, and a third person on some chicken pieces that must be her mother. Then she tries one of the croquettes.

The flavour is intense, and she stops a moment, wondering why it's so familiar. She's not even aware of the tears falling down her face as she eats one, then another, then another. These… These are her mother's croquettes. She can taste them, exactly the way Nodoka had made them for her the night before she made her wish.

Mother… Mother, I…

She finishes the last one, and again, finds herself not even sobbing, just tears falling down from her eyes to land in her now-empty bentou box. The other three girls look at each other again.

I want my Mama. The tears splash amongst the box as an ache stabs through Ranko's heart like a lance of fire. I want to go home.

"Ranko-san?" Akane asks, putting an arm about the girl and drawing her closer again. Ranko doesn't fight.

"It tasted like… like Mother's… And I… I…" Ranko says quietly. "I didn't deserve it."

Akane rubs her back soothingly. "Shh, shh. Of course you did. You've been lying to us about your lunches, haven't you?"

Ranko's head shoots up and she winces as a headache threatens to overwhelm her, but she looks back down and nods morosely. "…Y-yes."

"Why?"

Ranko doesn't answer. Her hands wring and twist around each other.

"Why did you lie to us, Ranko-chan?" Akane pauses but Ranko doesn't seem to notice the honorific, or doesn't care, so she keeps going. "We're your friends. We're going on a date tomorrow…"

Yuka and Sayuri look at each other and grin a moment.

"I-I was ashamed." Ranko says. "I don't deserve the help. I caused all this, I have to stand on my own."

Jibakurei.

"Ranko-chan, I've seen how thin you are. If you don't think you deserve it, you at least need it." Akane says, firmly. "That's it. While you're here, I'm bringing your lunch regardless of if you have one or not. You need to eat more anyway."

Ranko squirms. "B-but I…"

"No buts, Ranko-chan." Akane says firmly. Ranko squirms some more but acquiesces, finally.

Yuka and Sayuri look at each other, share a kiss, and then turn to the other two.

"So… You two going on a date huh?"

Ranko goes as red as her hair again, while Akane smiles victoriously.

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"She's back." Mousse says to Ryouga, who pauses in his sweeping.

"Who?"

"That girl." Mousse points subtly. "The one with red hair."

"So?"

"So, she comes by every now and again and just… stands there, watching us or the café."

Ryouga looks at the girl, who starts and looks away. "Huh." He says, scratching the side of his head. "Wonder why?"

"I think it's you." Mousse says. "Maybe she's got a crush?"

"Oho, a remnant, here?" Cologne's voice jars the two of them out of their musing as the elder joins them. "Oh, yes indeed children. She's definitely a remnant. Look at her chi."

"Elder?" Mousse asks.

"She's what's left after a wish negates her existence. Everything has a price. That being said…"

The old woman pogos across to the red-haired girl who starts.

Ranko eyes Cologne and once again feels that spike.

"Hello, child." She says, and Ranko bows.

"Greetings Honoured Elder of the Joketsuzoku." She says, respect in her voice. "I apologise for watching your shop. I was working the courage to speak with you. My name is Ranko and…"

"Ah, a respectful girl who knows my title. Might I assume you knew me in your previous life, Remnant?"

Ranko looks curious. "R-Remnant?"

"That's what you are, isn't it, hm?" Cologne asks, peering at the girl's blue eyes. "A leftover from another world where your wish took you away?"

Ranko shudders and wraps her arms about herself as if in pain. "Y-yes." She says.

"Well, Remnant," Cologne says, her voice soft. "Might I give you some advice?"

Ranko nods, looking at Cologne. Inside, the matriarch softens. This girl had to know her before if she expected wisdom from her. "Yes, Honoured Elder."

Cologne takes in a breath. "Leave." She says.

Ranko looks at her, shock on her face. "Wh-what?"

"Leave this place. There's nothing left for you here but memories that will haunt." She gives Ranko a direct stare. "For a Remnant, hanging around the places you existed in before will bring nothing but pain."

Ranko stares at Cologne a moment, a betrayed, hurt look on her face. But then, before she can say anything further or clarify what she means, the girl runs away from her and by the heavens she is fast.

"Find yourself a new place, Ranko the Remnant." Cologne mutters. But something inside her feels like she's made a mistake in not clarifying her meaning to that girl. "Feh." She mutters. "I'm not going to coddle some girl I don't know." She returns to the restaurant.

Ranko runs and runs until she can't run anymore, collapsing onto a bench somewhere in Nerima.

Pain.

All she does is bring pain.

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I feel you outside
At the edge of my life
I see you walk by
At the edge of my sight

~~
Cologne you dumb old woman, don't try to put things in all 'martial arts master mystery' ways if you don't know how your pupil will interpret the information

Let's talk roller-coasters. There's a theme park not too far from where I live called Alton Towers. In that park (at least I assume it's still there, it's been fifteen years since last time I went) there's a roller-coaster named "Oblivion".

This roller-coaster has a moment where the car just sort-of... Hangs, over the vertical drop into a dark tunnel.

In this fanfic, this is that moment. That breath before the darkness. That hanging moment before the plunge.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 6 - Pieces of Pieces

Life lived in perfect symmetry,
What I do, that will be done to me,
As the needle, slips into the run-out groove,
Love, maybe you feel it too,
And maybe you'll find, life is unkind,
And over so soon,
There is no golden gate,
There's no heaven waiting for you.

- Perfect Symmetry by Keane

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Ranko sits on the bench, pack next to her. She stares at her hands numbly, Colognes words repeating in her head over, and over, her mind spiralling and her thoughts darkening until her emotions feel like a black morass from which she can't even be bothered to struggle out of.

"Ranko-chan?" A voice cuts her reverie in half and for a moment she imagines it fading away. She wonders if the isolation is starting to get to her before she looks up and sees an angel.

Well, no, not an angel, but the closest analogue to it in her current hell of a life.

Akane looks at her worriedly and looks over the dirty overalls and blouse Ranko wears. "Are you okay?"

Ranko looks up and Akane's heart catches in her mouth. There's a misery so deep in those blue eyes she can't even begin to see the bottom. She sits down next to the red-haired girl and draws her close. Ranko doesn't shudder, she doesn't sob. Tears just run down her face silently.

They sit like that until a breeze blows and Akane shivers. "Well, that's enough sitting." She says brightly, standing up and helping Ranko up. The shy girl puts her large pack on her back and Akane frowns as something occurs to her that she doesn't voice. A suspicion starts bubbling in her mind.

"Well, I was jogging but I figure it wouldn't be very ladylike to let you walk home alone." Akane says, smiling. "So… lead the way."

Ranko shuffles in place.

The suspicion blooms from a bubbling seed into a torrent of worry. "Ranko-chan?"

"I… ah…" Ranko's face is downcast, shame writ large on her features. She can't tell Akane. She can't tell her she's homeless, because Akane will offer to let her stay at the dojo. She knows Akane well enough to know that the short-haired girl would offer it to her without even thinking.

But she can't, it'll just make things worse. Why did she even bother to come see Akane at school? She could have watched from afar and then quietly disappeared; except she hadn't quite believed the wish had really happened.

"Ranko-chan, you need to be honest with me." Akane's voice is soft as she puts both her hands onto the redhead's shoulders. "Are you… homeless?"

Ranko flinches and looks down, misery on her face. She takes minutes to answer, minutes in which Akane's breath comes slowly, in which her worries increase moment by moment.

"…Yes." Ranko says, softly, ashamedly.

"Are you on your own?"

Another long silence. Another few minutes in which Akane feels her heart breaking for this girl.

"…Yes." Ranko replies eventually. "It had to be so."

"You're coming with me." Akane says, grabbing for Ranko's hand. Ranko moves back fast; faster than she'd though someone could move.

"I can't." Ranko says miserably. "I just hurt people."

Akane stares. "You're hurting me by not taking my help."

Ranko wraps her arms about herself. "I'm sorry, Tendou-san." She says formally. "But if I leave now, I won't cause you further pain." She moves back out of range of Akane's hands. "Goodbye, Akane."

"Wait, Ranko, no, I-" Akane yells, but Ranko's gone in a flash. "Ranko, come back!"

It's a tired, sad and tearful Akane that makes her way into the Tendou dojo a few hours of wasted search later. "Tadaima." She calls listlessly, and Kimiko emerges from the hall.

"Akane, what's wrong? Did you hurt yourself on your jog?"

"…I found Ranko, Mom."

Kimiko frowns as Akane changes her shoes and slouches into the main house from the genkan. "Oh, you were saying you have a date with her tomorrow, don't you?"

"I don't know anymore." Akane says bitterly. "I found her sitting on a bench like she was going to be there the entire night." She sighs. "She had this big backpack with her and was wearing these… dirty pink overalls. She looked like she couldn't see anything, so I said hello."

Kimiko leads Akane to the family room, empty for now, and fetches tea for the two of them. Soun was out at some fancy do, and her sisters were both busy – Kasumi with her fiancé and Nabiki in her room doing who knew what. Auntie Nodoka had gone to her old house in Juuban to clean it up ready for some new tenants in a few months, though she said she may not be back until then anyway due to it needing some maintenance.

Kimiko sits down next to Akane on the engawa on the family room and passes her tea over. "How was your young friend?"

"She looked… lost, Mom." Akane says sadly. "Like everything was crashing down. I sat with her while she cried silently and then helped her to her feet and then offered to walk her home."

"Most gracious, dear." Kimiko says, smiling.

Akane laughs bitterly. "She's homeless. She hasn't anyone or anywhere to go, Mom."

"What?"

"Exactly what I said. While I've been worrying over her or sitting with Yuka and Sayuri and lending her manga and trying to cheer her up, she's been living on the streets and probably starving. That'll be why she's not been bringing lunch. Kami above, I feel so selfish. Here's her, suffering all the time, and then here's me asking her to date like nothing else is going on in her life."

"Where is she?" Kimiko asks. "I'd have thought you'd have brought her here."

Akane starts to cry and Kimiko puts her arms around the short-haired girl. "She told me she just hurts people and leaving means she won't hurt me anymore." She sobs. "Then she ran away, Mom. I tried to catch her, find her…"

Kimiko keeps hold of her daughter. "Well, maybe you can still meet her at school."

But Ranko doesn't come back to school. Not the next day, not the next week.

Sayuri and Yuka fret with Akane, and Akane waits outside the school and wanders most nights, looking for her friend. She feels an almost primal need to find her and bring her to safety, but there's nothing to find.

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Ranko stares at the house that she'd come to love. It had been an annoying run to Juuban and she's glad she changed from the uniform into her overalls as she's roof-hopped a little. It wasn't ladylike, but it was necessary as she had no money. It would have been even less ladylike if she'd been flashing her underwear for all and sundry to see.

It'd taken courage to come here; more than she'd thought she had. It's her last hope, really. Of all the people who knew her, surely her mother. Surely Nodoka would remember her. She's her mother. She gave birth to Ranko, she loves her daughter so, so much that Ranko always feels safe with her, even with their rocky start. Her mother promised she'd always love Ranko.

She's not attended school since the first couple of weeks. Her classmates were getting suspicious anyway, and while she was in the bathroom she overheard teachers talking about how they needed to find her because she wasn't on any system. She'd caught the word 'abused' floating around. So they'd seen the bruises and how thin she was starting to get.

And Akane found out the shameful truth of her homelessness.

She's had her confirmation, anyway. Akane is… Her breath catches. Akane is breathtaking.

She's strong. Strong and wonderful and everything Ranko had hoped she would become, and the redhead's nursing a crush far, far worse than the one she'd had when she was still Ranma. Desperately she wishes she could have gone on that date.

Nabiki, too, is changed. It's subtle, but she's less the ice queen and more simply a gossip queen. Her tricks and information are less malicious, and from rumours she knows that Nabiki helps those who are bullied or need help.

She doesn't know much about Kasumi but given that she'd seen her on that first day dressed fancy and clearly going to a job or class, she's her own person.

She wants to feel happy for them, and underneath it she is, she's so pleased they seem so happy.

But she's not happy, she's miserable. She'd thought she was alone before, now she truly is, and there's something about her that puts people off.

Nerima was hurting her too much to stay in. Familiar streets that were unfamiliar too.

Now she's staring at her mother's house and the auburn-haired woman sweeping up in front of it. After a moment Nodoka looks up and smiles at Ranko and the girl's heart finally shears in two.

There's no recognition in those eyes – they're kind and ladylike and her gentle expression is soothing, but her mother looks on Ranko as a stranger she's never met. Ranko manages a trembling smile and then turns and walks away, her chest ice, her heart broken.

She finds a bench nearby and sits, wrapping her arms around her knees and starting to sob. It hurts. It hurts so much. It's so painful she feels like she's dying, like everything's shattering apart inside her. Why did she make that wish? What kind of evil price is this to ask of someone?

Why did she make the wish when it would hurt so much?

A weight settles on the bench next to her and a gentle arm wraps around her. "There there, young miss, it's alright."

Ranko's head snaps up and she looks into the kind eyes of her mother. Nodoka's brown eyes look into her blue and there's nothing there but the kindness of someone who dislikes seeing people unhappy.

Ranko swears she can hear her heart breaking, shattering, burning, freezing all at the same time. Her breath catches and she can't force another one out, in. Everything's spinning around her and her stomach churns like she's eaten bad apples.

She falls off the bench, scrambling to a nearby trashcan and heaves. She's not eaten for a day or two, and that was a block of instant noodles she got from a vending machine, so all she does is throw up yellowish bile into it, the burning in her throat adding to the gnawing in her belly.

A soft hand pats her back, another pulls her hair out of her face as she heaves and eventually slides down to the floor, head bowed as she breathes heavily, tears splashing onto the ground.

She has to get away.

Nodoka makes soothing noises as the girl with red hair cries, kneeling in front of the bin. She can't understand why such a pretty little thing can cry so horribly; like her heart had been pulled out of her chest, torn and battered. Who has hurt this lovely child so?

Somehow, Nodoka senses it's about her. Something about Nodoka herself has caused the girl to cry – she only reacted when Nodoka looked at her, smiled at her, greeted her. But why?

Nodoka has never seen this girl in her life. She seems oddly familiar, but Nodoka sees a person in need and helps. It's the honourable thing to do, and even if tradition never helped her with her awful ex-husband she still believes in some things.

"It'll be alright, dear. Come on, dry your eyes. Such a pretty young thing as you shouldn't cry so – it's painful to see…"

The crying worsens into a horrible, horrible wailing.

Nodoka can't stand the noise, it's a keening, wounded sound she'd never expected a person to be able to make. She can't imagine what would make someone sound so utterly broken, and it's a noise she hopes never, ever to hear again in her life.

And just as suddenly as it worsened, the girl is gone. There's just an afterimage of her.

Nodoka stares in shock at the empty street she's left kneeling in. The girl is so fast. The backpack she had is gone, too, though she sees some things were left behind in the redhead's hasty escape. A small wallet, looking like a photo wallet and a bentou box. She picks the items up and carries them into her old house.

Opening the bentou she finds it's old and smells musty though there's no food residue in there. It also doesn't look like food's been in there a while and given what the girl was throwing up into the bin outside it's likely she hasn't eaten in a day or two.

"Homeless?"

The girl was a little gaunt and there was a hollowness in her eyes. Something she'd recognised from people like that before.

She picks the wallet up and unzips it. It's a photo wallet, and the first one captures her attention immediately.

That's the girl there, but around her are a family. She looks a little younger, though not by much, and to her shock it's the Tendou family, along with a large panda. She's smiling shyly at the camera, sitting next to Akane. Nabiki stands next to them, and Kasumi behind her. On the other side is the panda bear and Soun, though she notes Kimiko isn't in it – probably taking the photo.

The next few are of the girl and the Tendou family; candid shots; but no Kimiko. She'd have expected Kimiko to be in these if the rest of the Tendou family are. Her family, really. But she is away a lot lately.

She flips a page over and gasps. There's a photograph of her. Well, not exactly her, it's her in full formal getup. Kimono, makeup, hair ornaments. Next to her stands the girl, both of them beaming.

The date written underneath is only a few weeks ago. Nodoka's hands shake as she turns the page over, showing herself still in kimono (though not a formal furisode) with her arms around the girl who's in a white sun dress. They both look happy. The date is the day before that. Underneath is written "Ranko and Nodoka".

The next photo is the girl in a pair of green pyjamas, looking tired and leaning on a large boy with fangs in his mouth. It's obviously a candid shot, though the way it's been taken makes her think she took it.

But she can't have. She can't have taken or been in any of these and yet…

"What on earth is this?" She wonders aloud. "Am I going crazy?" She turns the photos back to the one of her and the girl, and looking closely, she sees their resemblance. The girl looks just like her daughter would have looked, does look in her few dreams of being a mother. Of her dream since she miscarried, and her ex-husband started demeaning her for being unable to have a child.

"Who are you, Ranko?"

She doesn't notice the figure in purple shorts grin with sharp teeth to herself as she moves away from the garden of Nodoka's house, hopping over the wall.

"Whoever fucked my plans up needs addressing." Chirp. "You said it, Bob. Glad I was able to grab that album and leave it there." Chirp. "Yeah, I know, I know. But this'll tickle her brain. I've a feeling I know who messed with that little romance I was building."

Rachel looks up and down the street, sighing as a Youma wanders along, punting it into a wall and proceeding to tie it up for the local magical girls. "Man, these guys just aren't a challenge. I miss daemon fighting."

Chirp.

"No kidding, Bob." Rachel says. "Well, at least we can try to get things back on track. We'll see about getting Akane to find her and I need her Mum to go seek that dumb old woman's advice before I give her this." She flips a bobbin of thread in her hands. "She's gotta accept some stuff before she's ready."

Chirp.

"Yeah you said it."

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Ranko curls up in the small cubby-hole she'd vaulted to; the attic of a long disused shop in the commercial district of Nerima. It's partly open to the elements but no one lives here so she's not taking it from anyone, and it's at least out of the wind and covered.

She's been here a week or so now. Time keeps slipping from her and it's more the next meal to the next meal, sparse as they are. Sometimes she finds money on the floor and she can buy something that quells the clawing pain in her stomach and the headache drilling in her head. Most days she doesn't.

She's avoided going back near her old homes.

Cologne is right, she thinks, Cologne is entirely right. She only ever brings pain. Even now, when no one knows her – she makes her friends lives worse by just being there, making them fret, making them worry.

Staying near them is a mistake.

She only brings pain.

She only ever brought pain, even when she was Ranma.

The evidence is all there if she but looks. Ryouga is happily married with two spouses who clearly adore him as much as he adores them. Xian Pu, Mousse are happy together with Ryouga. The Tendou family is whole, unbroken, Soun being a pillar of the community and his wife too. Kasumi doing a medical degree, Nabiki being someone who almost seems to run the school gossip and social scene.

Ukyou is probably able to be a girl all the time, no loss of honour. She doesn't know if Yuka and Sayuri were going out in the previous version of the world, but if that's changed then it's obviously for the better given how in love they are.

Even her mother, when she remembers how she saw, seems… younger, more vibrant and less lonely. If she's lived with the Tendou family and not spent twelve years alone, waiting for a son that will never come home as he was, then her life can only have been better.

And Akane is…

Akane is beautiful in a way Ranko almost can't describe. Like someone took the rough gem that had been her friend and polished it until it shone. She still has her bad temper and she still has such issues spitting out that she likes someone that it makes Ranko smile, but that pain and that rage are gone. That red and grey, and she's everything a martial artist should be.

Ranko can easily admit to being smitten – it's Akane after all, and she's found she's attracted to strength like that, casual wonderful strength and it's still Akane and she still has lingering feelings from being Ranma. Combined with her own likes it's no surprise she's already fallen in love.

Which is why she has to leave, stay away from her. Akane deserves better. She deserves so, so much better than a girl who doesn't exist, who wished her life away and now is trapped in a hell that never ends.

A girl who brings nothing but pain.

So Ranko, the last remnant of a world wished away, curls up further and cries herself to sleep, gnawing hunger in her belly and abject misery in her heart.

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Oh boy, you ought to leave this town,
Get out while you can, the meter's running out,
The voices in the streets you love,
Everything is better when you hear that sound,
Spineless dreamers, hide in churches,
Pieces of pieces of rush hour buses,
I dream in emails, worn out phrases,
Mile after mile of just empty pages.

This chapter made me cry to write, but it had to be written. I just couldn't not write it. I need this story out of my head or else it lives in there. We're near the nadir of things now.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 7 - The Same Old Vacant Stare

I don't know where I am,
And I don't really care,
I look myself in the eye,
There's no one there.

I fall upon the earth,
I call upon the air,
But all I get is the same old vacant stare.

- Crystal Ball by Keane

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Nodoka spends days looking at the photographs, holding them up so that they fit in the space in her house from where they were taken. Thanking the kami that the new tenants weren't moving in for several months, she knows she has a lot to ponder.

The dates, the photographs, that they're taken in this house and the Tendou dojo, the girl's similar features to her, the closeness the picture of her and the girl shows makes Nodoka long for something. Like there's a hole in her life. The hole there's been ever since the miscarriage and subsequent finding out of her unsuitability to bear children. Genma's cruelty and her finally throwing him out and divorcing him publicly as the honourless cur he is.

But she always felt a hole in her life. Even when Kimiko came round, packed all of her things up and all but frog-marched her to the Tendou home to live there with them and help raise the girls, even raising those three now lovely young women, there was a hole, and she recognises it as the lack of her own child.

The girl. The girl with red hair. She has to be Nodoka's baby, somehow not dead in a miscarriage but alive. But how? She knows she didn't birth the baby, it was far, far too early for any baby to survive birth when the pregnancy failed. Yet this photograph shows a healthy girl with her mother.

With Nodoka.

Nodoka holds the wallet and purses her lips. She feels like reality has slipped. Like it's changing beyond what it should be. Whispers of something off in the world constantly hound her now.

Shaking her head, she stands and then dons her most formal kimono. She should seek the wisdom of someone versed in things like magic. The Elder who runs the Nekohanten nearby probably has some knowledge in magic, and magic seems to be the case. Nodoka isn't someone who doesn't believe in magic; she knows all too well that the supernatural dwells partially out of sight. Some of the things she's had to fight…

She brings the photo wallet and the empty bentou box with her and makes her way. Peeking in, she sees it's a slow afternoon and nods to herself, stepping in with a smile. Seeing the lovely purple-haired girl and her husband manning the room, she bows. "May I speak with Elder Kuh Lon please, dear? It's regarding some strange magic."

The girl smiles at Nodoka and nods. "I will get her. Airen can serve food in meantime."

Nodoka inclines her head and orders a bowl of noodles to enjoy while she waits. Not too long later, a wizened, elderly lady hops up next to Nodoka on her cane and looks sharply at the auburn-haired woman.

"My great-granddaughter tells me you require my assistance, child?"

Nodoka bristles slightly but remembers that the elder lady probably does see her as a child given her age and experience. "Greetings Elder Kuh Lon, I do indeed seek the aid of one with knowledge of magic."

"Oho, magic is it?"

"Indeed." Nodoka finishes her noodles and wipes her mouth. She puts the photo wallet and the bentou on the table, in a carrier bag, but doesn't take them out yet. "Tell me, how can someone have been born and yet not been born?"

Cologne laughs. "Ah, a paradox! Well, there are certainly ways to change things, though none are perfect. The nanban mirror for instance."

Nodoka nods. "I met a girl. A girl I have never seen in my life before, yet my heart sang on seeing her as if there were a hole in the world for me that she slotted into perfectly. A missing piece of a jigsaw. And yet, again, I had not met her before."

Cologne's eyebrows raise. "A remnant perhaps." She muses. Nodoka looks curious but doesn't ask.

"And then there is this." She pulls the wallet out and puts it on the table, opening it. Cologne takes a look, and then understanding dawns in her eyes.

"Oh, it was that Remnant. They're rare enough that I thought it was her."

"Who is she, Elder?"

"She's your daughter." A new voice enters the conversation, and the two turn to see a girl with reddish-brown hair holding a strange little tentacle creature. She wears a lot of purple and her teeth are sharp, bared in a mocking grin at Cologne. "I wondered which of you screwed up my plan."

The girl approaches and Cologne's stick lashes out to bonk her. The girl halts it with a finger that has crystal talon instead of fingernail. "None of that, girl." The brunette's little companion chirps. "You said it, Bob."

"Who are you?" Nodoka asks, trying to stay polite.

"Rachel Turner. Or I guess in your local way of putting it, Turner Rachel. I'm a magical girl angel. If you can believe the angel part anyway. I'm not far off apotheosis but still have a few decades yet to catch up on my mentor."

"What?"

Cologne tries to take her stick back, but Rachel wrenches it off her and inspects it. "Chi reinforced. Nice. Might let you have it back once you listen to me and apologise for messing my wonderfully neat plan up."

"Plan?"

"Oh yeah, you see I wasn't happy with what happened to little miss Ranko. So, I was working in the background, pushing her and her friend together so that she could have some happiness. I didn't expect a child with no more heart than an insect has to screw that up." She looks to Cologne.

"Child? I tell you now, girlie, I am over three hund-"

"Be. Quiet." Rachel's voice is dark, commanding and menacing, a touch of other voices on the edge of them. Reality shivers about her a moment. "I am more than five hundred years old, child, I can call you that, I think."

Nodoka looks to the young-looking girl, then the Amazon elder and can't help but titter nervously. "You look good for it."

"I've aged well." The girl says to Nodoka in friendlier tones. She actually smiles at the auburn-haired woman, then returns to glaring at Cologne. "Questions?" Cologne shakes her head. "Good. Now, if she ever comes here again, feed her and give her a place to stay and let her mother know. She can take it from there." Rachel's eyes shine a dark purple. "And if I hear you haven't done so if she does, I'll be upset."

There's a poof of pink smoke and a tiny girl with pink hair appears. To Nodoka's shock, Cologne immediately bows to her. "K-Kami-sama!" She stutters. "We didn't expect…"

The pinkette smiles softly. "No one ever does, dear." She says. Then she puts a hand on Rachel's arm. "You're bending the limits, Rachel."

"I know, I'm just pissed off. Had a whole plan for those two disasters and everything."

"It will come. For now… Miss Nodoka?" The pinkette turns, ignoring the still kowtowing Cologne. "I'm afraid we'll need to go to your house, and you might be out of it for a month or two, but trust me, it'll be better. Is that OK?" Nodoka nods blankly. "Great!" And the tiny goddess takes her hand and leads her out. Rachel follows behind, throwing rude gestures at Cologne until the pink-haired one tells her to stop in a resigned tone.

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Ranko stares at the bag of oranges as it slides towards her, dropped out of a shopping bag. Her stomach aches and she almost drools. Painfully, she leans down and picks it up. Looking to and fro, for a second, she reaches to open it. Then she sees the person who dropped it and she's filled with disgust at herself.

"E-excuse me?" She asks politely of the woman, who turns and eyes her ragged overalls. Ranko holds out the oranges. "You d-dropped these from your shopping bag, Ma'am."

The lady takes them, eyeing her suspiciously. Ranko bows and moves away, closing her eyes and finding a bench to sit at.

How long has it been now? A month? A month and a half? Like before, all she can do is to count between meals, though even that's hazy now.

Later that evening, she's sat in her cubby-hole and she hears a woman yelling. She leans out and sees her being accosted by two very uncouth-looking gentlemen.

Silently dropping to the ground, she moves nearby stealthily and watches as one of them paws at the woman while she struggles. Ranko's eyes harden. A lady doesn't fight unless needed, and right now it's needed.

She moves in nearby and the men look up, the woman pleading to Ranko to get away as she walks towards them. She still feels light-headed, but the battle-aura running through her seems to be feeding her energy.

"Please let her go." Ranko says in a quiet, disused voice.

The men look at each other and laugh.

Ranko shrugs and walks up to them.

They aren't laughing after she deposits them in a pile on the floor against a wall, pressure points on their legs pressed so they won't be standing anytime soon. Ranko glares at them. "Don't come around here again." She spits. She turns to the lady and smiles. "Hello, Ma'am. Sorry about that. They clearly don't know they shouldn't be here."

The woman stares at the tiny redhead in front of her in the dirty pink overalls, and just nods. "Th-thank you." She says. Ranko smiles and bows.

"Excuse me, I'm going to deposit them at the police box." And Ranko grabs the two by the back of their collars and proceeds to do so, knocking on the door. The woman follows, now curious, as Ranko puts the men down and explains to the policeman that they'd attempted assault on the lady and that she had set off pressure points to stop them walking.

Once the men are arrested and taken away, she turns to the woman again. "Will you be safe, Ma'am?" The woman nods and Ranko smiles at her. "Good."

"Thank you again…" The woman says, bowing, and then looks up. The girl is gone.

Back in the attic above the abandoned shop she'd taken for her own, Ranko curls up. She knows she's probably not going to survive for very long like this. The hunger is so, so painful, and it's taking more effort to run through any exercises to keep her chi flowing.

But on the other hand, she's finding it hard to care. She won't voluntarily kill herself. She promised Ryouga back… when? A month? A year? A lifetime ago? She'd promised her Ryouga that she'd not do it again. And even though he (she?) doesn't exist anymore, at least she can keep that promise.0

But she never promised to not stop herself dying. And she knows she's on borrowed time, on the verge of starvation at all times. The meagre food she manages to get from dropped change won't really fill her belly.

It only staves off the inevitable and she doesn't care. Maybe when she dies, she can see everyone again.

She found this cubby-hole and simply moved her things in. She's helped people around the district when they've been threatened, and she can hear it. Those few moments of helping people remind her of why Ranma learned the Art, and why even if she hates fighting or hurting people she still does too.

At least she remembers pressure points better than Ranma had, else it might get messy, and it won't be long before she'll be out of luck, or energy, or both. And she's made peace with that, looks forward to it even. But she can at least make herself useful by helping people in the meantime.

The next day she takes a walk with her pack. She doesn't know really where she's going until she runs out of energy.

It's still early in the morning, and she's near a park somewhere. She thinks she's still in Nerima, but she sits on a bench and closes her eyes a moment, trying not to let the black morass of her thoughts overwhelm her.

"Hey there, sugar, y'ok?" Ranko looks up from where she's, rubbing her arms to stave off the cold. She looks into the eyes of Kuonji Ukyou. The familiar spike in her heart barely even registers anymore, though she's surprised to see Ukyou here. Wherever here is, she guesses. She hadn't really been paying attention.

She sees a familiar, beaten up yatai and blinks. Of course, without her here Genma wouldn't have run off with it. She can't see Ukyou's father but that might be because she's out here learning her trade alone. Well, not alone, she sees a familiar kunoichi standing in her gorgeous kimono and serving okonomiyaki already.

Is she a she here or has she realised, or is she simply a boy who enjoys cross-dressing? Ranko wonders a moment before shaking her head. It doesn't matter.

"I'm fine." She says softly, looking down. "I'm sorry to have been a bother."

Ukyou frowns, and Ranko looks up at her. Ukyou looks… good. Not dressed as a boy, not having to wear a gakuran. She's dressed very prettily. "Well, can I getcha an okonomiyaki at all? Cute gal like yourself deserves a treat!"

Ranko's stomach grumbles a moment, and she tries to quell it. The gnawing ache gets harder and harder to ignore every day. "I haven't enough money." She says softly. "Sorry."

Ukyou frowns as she takes in the sunken cheeks of the girl, her gaunt appearance and the dirt on her overalls. She looks at the pack the girl has, and the hollowness in her eyes. The air of isolation. Homeless?

Ukyou's eyes soften as she reaches a hand out. "Well, lucky for you I got some batter and toppings that are just shy'a spoilin', so ya'd be doin' me a favour if you had a couple."

Ranko looks at the hand dumbly. Ukyou is still wonderful, lovely Ukyou. Always ready to jump in to help. Guilt wells up in her. "I c-couldn't possibly…"

"Nah, you totally could." Ukyou says and reaches down to help Ranko to her feet. Ranko sways a moment, dizziness washing over her and a whistling sounding in her ears before she shakes her head. Now she has a headache on top of the gnawing pain in her tummy. "Woof, you alright? You're really light."

Ranko nods vaguely as Ukyou leads her by the hand over to the small table set by the yatai. Ukyou all but pushes her onto the fold-out chair and gently boots her pack underneath. "I'll make you a special with all of the toppings that are goin' bad."

Ranko nods, looking at the table, guilt all over her features, though she hardly notices, the cloak of numbness still wrapped around her.

Ukyou heads to the grill on the yatai as Konatsu looks the redhead over as she slumps on the chair, dazed. "She looks a mess, the poor dear." The kunoichi says softly. "Homeless? She looks like she's starving. And I don't mean in the 'I'm really hungry' way, I mean in the 'to death' way."

Ukyou nods. "She refused food as well until I insisted and even then I suspect we'll have trouble feeding her. She's got that air you used to have. The whole 'I don't matter and don't deserve things' one."

Konatsu blushes as she sighs. "Poor girl." She says with empathy in her voice. "It took you ages to break me of the habit, and you were very persistent. That and the hormones help me feel a little less horrible."

Ukyou smiles at her girlfriend. "Ah well, Kona-honey, you know I love you. Least we can do for the poor lass is feed her a bit." She starts pouring the batter onto the griddle, making an extra large okonomiyaki, on which she puts the most nutritious foods she can. Konatsu purses her lips as she sees the size of the okonomiyaki Ukyou's making.

"What is it?"

"We need to ask how long it's been since she ate."

"Why?"

"Refeeding syndrome." Konatsu says, sadly. "If someone is literally starving to death and they eat too much at once their body can't handle it."

"Really?"

"Really. It could kill her if her body's in starvation mode. Trust me, I'm… familiar with it."

Ukyou curses under her breath. "Should we get her to a hospital?"

Konatsu shrugs. "I don't know, Ucchan. She's still moving and walking so I don't know if she's that far gone. But Perhaps give it to her in a box and tell her to eat it a small bit at a time. It should keep a few days at least."

Ukyou nods. "Right you are, sugar." She says, flipping the huge pancake over and continuing to cook it. She puts it into a takeaway box and then makes a much, much smaller one which she puts on a paper plate and slides in front of the girl as she sits down.

Ranko looks at it, trembling hands reaching for the chopsticks Ukyou holds out. Ukyou smiles at her. "You want to be careful eatin', sugar, if you've not for a while. Small bits over time, alright?" She puts the boxed okonomiyaki down. "Eat this over the next couple of days. Slowly, and small bits at a time, or you'll get sick."

Ranko nods, eating the tiny okonomiyaki she'd been given daintily. She wonders if she should feel like she wants to cry – all she feels is numb, empty. She's felt like this for a while, cold. Like something inside her finally broke and now she's just an automaton running on outdated systems that don't know they should have stopped.

Ukyou smiles at her and hands over a card. "I'm Kuonji Ukyou, sugar."

"R-Ranko." The redhead says softly, her voice rusty.

"Pleased to meet you. You got a place to stay?"

Ranko looks up and nods. Ukyou senses she's telling the truth, though she doesn't realise said truth is that she has a hole in the attic of an abandoned shop in which she waits to die.

"Good thing. Well, I'll be movin' nearby and settin' up an okonomiyaki place, it's in my blood. Can't work from a yatai forever!" Ukyou grins at Ranko. "If you need a hot dinner, hit me up alright, sugar?"

No. "O-okay." Ranko says, finishing the last of the okonomiyaki and standing up, bowing. "Th-thank you for the okonomiyaki, Kuonji-san." She says softly, still in that rusty voice.

She makes to walk away but Ukyou stops her and presses the box into her hands. "Eat this slowly, a small bit at a time, over the next few days okay sugar? It should keep a little."

Ranko stammers, but walks off with the box, still feeling numb.

She's still numb as she looks at the box in her cubby-hole when she returns.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 8 - The Angel of Nerima

And it's not what you expected,
The way the world you built loves to cut you down,
The way your head gets twisted,
And you sit up all night trying to figure it out.

And they say; you've made your bed now,
Don't you see you've brought it on yourself?
And they say that you should move on,
But you can't even get your shoes on.

And it's the voices in your head now,
Saying; there's something wrong about,
The way I feel,
A broken link, a missing part, a punctured wheel.

- "The Way I Feel" by Keane

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The sound of a little girl crying pulls Ranko out of her reverie. It's late at night and she's been curled up in the tiny space she's taken most of the day, mostly staring at Ucchan's okonomiyaki.

She drops down into the alley, looking for the sound and eventually finds a scuffed and dirty little girl with black hair, crying next to a bin. There's nothing around, and no one else, but the girl doesn't look too bad. She's scuffed and a little dirty but doesn't look like she's living on the streets.

The girl looks up as the red-haired girl glides down from the roofs, the moon framing her. She brightens and stops crying as Ranko kneels down next to her. She's heard about the nice lady who helps people, and this looks like her. Plus, she's like a ninja!

"Hello." Ranko says, and the girl hears a voice that sounds ethereal and odd, as if it's not used much. Ranko gets a good look at the little girl. She's about six, black hair in twintails and wearing a cute pink ruffled dress. She's clean and well-fed so she's not a vagrant like Ranko. Ranko had expected her to not be pleased to see a stranger like Ranko, but the girl is beaming at her.

"H-hello!" The girl says. "Are you the Angel?"

Ranko looks confusedly at her. "Angel?"

"Yeah!" The girl says excitedly, her predicament forgotten in her excitement. "The Angel of Nerima!"

Ranko shakes her head. "I… didn't know we had an angel."

The girl beams. "They said she has red hair and appears like a ghost from above, just like you did!"

Ranko blushes. She had been helping a lot of people by dropping from the roofs, apparently that was enough for the rumour mill. "A-ah…" She coughs a moment. "…Why were you crying?"

The girl's face falls as if on cue. "I can't find my mama." She whimpers. Ranko looks from left to right and then shakes her head. It's far too late at night – the girl must have been wandering for ages. Why?

"When did you see your mama last?"

"It w-w-was th-this afternoon, a b-b-bad man tried to g-grab me, so I r-r-ran and and I escaped but I d-d-don't know where I ended up!" The girl bawls, grabbing onto Ranko's waist. Ranko shakes her head. She's not exactly clean, but the girl has a death-grip.

Ranko pats the girl's head. "I'm sorry to hear that. What's your name?"

"Ogino M-Miki, Angel-san." The girl says. Ranko smiles down into her blue eyes, very similar to Ranko's own.

"Pleased to meet you, Ogino-chan." Ranko nods. "Well, it's very late, let's see if the police box is manned, shall we? They should be able to help – everywhere else is closed." Miki nods into Ranko's stomach and the redhead gently pushes her away. She offers her hand and Miki takes it in hers. "Though you should be more careful talking to strange people, Ogino-chan."

"But you're not strange, you're the Angel!" Miki says happily. "So, I know you're nice!"

Ranko blushes again and the two set off.

Unfortunately, the police box is closed for the time being and the usual officer who's taken to thanking Ranko for her efforts isn't here at the moment. Ranko sighs. "Well, Ogino-chan, I don't think it's going to be tonight we'll find your mama." She says sadly.

Miki looks crestfallen. "But…"

"It's fine!" Ranko says. "You can stay with me tonight, I have a little attic place you can stay with me, and a bedroll if you don't mind it a bit mucky."

Ranko's not really been taking care of herself – what's the point? Her main thoughts are just to sit and stew in her pain or look for people to help. The end isn't too far away and she's not looking away from it.

Miki brightens at her words, though. "Oh! Okay! I get to stay with Angel-san tonight so that's fine!"

Ranko smiles at the girl and leads her to the alley where her attic is and then picks Miki up. She has to flush more of her chi into her system just to do so, but she leaps straight up into the small hole and pushes Miki through, then crawls in.

Miki makes 'ooh' and 'aah' noises at the dirty, open-to-the-elements attic in which Ranko's sequestered herself. She sits next to Ranko's pack and smiles. "Wow, it's like a secret base!"

Ranko tries to smile at that, at the thought of the hole she'd crawled into to wait for death being some kind of secret superheroine's base. If she wasn't so numb and shattered inside, she might even be able to believe it.

She pulls herself from the swirling black morass her thoughts threaten to lead her into and looks at the little girl who is her charge for tonight.

She sits on the bedroll next to Miki, who is still chattering away, picking up the box with the large okonomiyaki in.

Miki's stomach grumbles as Ranko's does, and Ranko looks down at the box she'd received only this morning from her sister in another life. Miki's a girl with her parents somewhere looking for her. She can go hungry for a while.

Ranko looks at her hands and then the box, then at Miki and then feels a deep shame. She doesn't deserve it anyway.

She opens the box, smiling painfully at the little girl. "Here." She says warmly, holding out a pair of chopsticks that Ukyou had put into it for her. "I hear a grumbly tummy. Best fill it."

Miki takes the box and smells the okonomiyaki. It's cold by now, but it's still Ucchan's and half of it's gone before Miki slows down and smiles happily. "Oh, thank you Angel-san!"

"Call me Ranko." The redhead says, watching the okonomiyaki disappear. Her stomach clenches in on itself. A feeling of wanting to cry breaks into the numbness and she swallows it down, pushing the emotions down. They won't help.

"Don't you want any, Ranko-nee-san?" Miki asks, pausing.

Ranko swallows, trying not to salivate. "I ate earlier." She half-lies.

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Ranko spends most of the night while Miki is awake telling her very heavily edited stories of her time as Ranma. Miki seems to find half of them very funny, though Ranko does take some of the more dangerous elements out and makes them far more fun than they had been.

She seems to like Akane and Ranko smiles at that. "I like Akane too. I've got a friend very much like her who's not quite so bad tempered."

Miki likes that idea, but eventually the stories slow down as Miki tires out and eventually sleeps. Ranko lets her take the bedroll, putting over the ragged sleeping bag and leaning against her pack.

Her stomach hurts again, but the gnawing, biting, clawing ache is a constant companion, as is the headache that feels like someone drilling into her skull. She sits and contemplates her life, and the hell she is in.

"What did I do?" She asks the sky through the hole in the roof. "I made a wish, yes, but everything before? Why do I deserve that? Do even I deserve this?"

Miki grumbles so Ranko shuts up and looks down at her hands. Her skin is filthy – what's the point in bathing, she'll just get dirty again and now she's not at school there's only so much she can do. She winces as she moves, her back sore.

Eventually she falls asleep and dreams of happier times. The dreams are happy but waking to the nightmare existence she lives now is just as awful as the first time she dreamed she was back in her bed in her mother's home. Waking up in the night, she pulls the still-somehow-pristine pyjamas in their plastic wrapping and clutches them to her like a stuffed toy, like a lifeline.

Those dreams can crack through her numbness for a short while.

She's woken by the tapping of small hands and opens her eyes to find Miki staring at her with blue eyes so similar to her own. Miki smiles. "Ranko-nee-chan was sleeping very heavily!"

Ranko blinks and stretches her cricked back, trying to limber herself up. "Good morning, Miki." She says in her soft, disused voice, harsh with not having yet recovered from overuse yesterday.

Miki smiles at her. "Thank you for letting me stay."

"You're welcome." Ranko says as she stands. She pops her head out of the roof-hold and looks to the clocktower nearby. 8AM, so most places are probably starting to open, and the police box should be manned now.

Ranko holds her hand out to Miki, who takes it. Ranko then picks the little girl up and hops out of the hole, keeping her battle aura up to feed chi into her weakening body. She hops over some roofs and then drops down into the street, setting Miki down who now has a bright smile.

"That was so COOL, Ranko-nee-chan! Are you a ninja as well as an angel?!"

Ranko shakes her head. "I'm just Ranko, Miki-chan." She says softly, taking the girl's hand and walking down the street.

The two of them make an odd pair – the girl in the cute, slightly dirty dress as if from playing and the gaunt spectre of a girl with red hair in filthy and ragged overalls. Ranko catches sight of herself in the windows of a shop and looks away immediately. She's not sure why Miki hadn't run away screaming from that hollow-cheeked, blank-eyed nightmare she sees reflected back.

The body reflecting the soul, she supposes. She's felt broken, empty and numb for the whole time she's been here, so why not look like it on the outside?

Miki chatters at her and she makes noises of assent as they turn the corner onto the main street of the industrial district and the sight of the police box. Officer Kanazawa is there as always and he smiles at Ranko. He'd once tried to follow her to where she was, having correctly guessed she was homeless, but she's sneaky and fast enough to evade him.

He won't arrest her while she's useful, she knows, and she plans to make it so he can at least know when she dies, if she gets enough time to let him know.

He eyes her as she approaches with the little girl holding her hand and raises his eyebrow.

"Angel-san." He says. Ranko blushes. He laughs. "I see you heard that name from your little friend?"

Ranko nods. "Y-yes. This is Ogino Miki-chan, Officer Kanazawa-san." She smiles painfully. "She was lost last night, and the box wasn't manned so I had her stay with me."

"Ranko-nee-san has a secret base and everything!" Miki says proudly. "It's so cool!"

The policeman sighs and smiles at Ranko. "Glad you found her; I know her mother's been having kittens. She had wondered if Ogino-chan here had wandered into the industrial and commercial district. If you two sit down, I'll let her mother know so she can pick her up."

Ranko nods, sitting heavily on the nearby bench with Miki, exhausted already. Miki chatters away and Ranko tries to interact until a voice speaks in shock.

"M-Miki? MIKI!" There's a rustle of cloth as a blur picks the little girl up and crushes her to its chest.

Ranko recognises a mother seeing her daughter and moves off the bench to give them some space. She watches as the mother alternately scolds and praises the girl for running away from the bad men but too far, and for trusting a stranger.

"But Mama, she's the Angel of Nerima, not a stranger!" Miki protests, and the woman turns, her blue eyes like her daughter's zeroing in on Ranko. The woman smiles at her.

"Thank you, Angel-san."

"Ranko."

Miki's mother looks over the girl, noting she can't be out of high-school age yet. She takes in the filthy and damaged clothes, the half-wrecked footwear and the girl's hollow eyes that contain a pain she can't even understand. Not to mention how scarecrow-thin the girl is.

"Thank you, Ranko. For looking after my daughter and bringing her back to me safe. How can I repay you?"

Ranko shakes her head. "I didn't do it for payment, Ogino-san." She says softly.

Officer Kanazawa nods. "She never asks for the rewards we offer or takes them, Ogino-san so it's probably best to let it lie."

"But…"

Ranko shrugs. "It's the right thing to do, and I can at least do some good with my life if I help. Goodbye."

Ranko leaps onto a nearby roof and slips out of sight and Miki waves while her mother looks on in amazement.

Officer Kanazawa chuckles. "She does that. It's one reason she's also known as the 'Ghost of Nerima', at least to the idiot yakuza or gang members that come around here causing trouble.

Miki beams. "Ranko-nee-san is so cool!"

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Akane sits in class and growls, frustratedly, to herself. She's been out at least once a week, looking for her friend. But it's like the girl's a ghost. No one knows who she is, she doesn't exist on anything formal. Even Nabiki cannot find her.

It's like she never existed – she'd have said that she'd been lying about her name, but for the fact that Ranko responded to her name instinctively.

She sighs as she finishes class for the day and heads out of the school to walk home with Yuka and Sayuri, who both seem as down as she is.

"Still no luck?" Yuka asks, squeezing her girlfriend's hand.

Akane shakes her head. "No. I think I'm going to stop."

Sayuri looks at her sadly. "Really?"

Akane nods morosely. "Really." She says softly. She scrubs at her eyes. "I don't know. I just… It's been three months. If she was starving before, she's probably… you know."

Yuka's face falls. "Oh, I hope not. She seemed so nice."

Akane sighs and nods. "She was. She seemed to like hearing about my family, like she enjoyed hearing about people being happy."

The three of them are silent the rest of the walk until Akane turns to her home's gate. "You two lovebirds take care."

Yuka and Sayuri nod and walk off, while Akane makes her way to the genkan and changes her shoes. Kimiko smiles at her softly. "Good evening, Akane dear. Not looking tonight?"

"I… think I'm going to stop." Akane admits. Kimiko sighs.

"I thought this would come. I'm sorry, dear. I hope wherever she is, she's happy."

Akane nods. "Me too, Mom." She says, giving her mother a hug. "Me too."

She's eating her dinner at the table with her family when the feeling comes over her. A strange, nagging, tugging feeling. She tries to ignore it and finish her dinner, but while she's breaking bricks it comes again. Akane frowns. As a martial artist of some skill, she knows better than to ignore her senses.

She walks into the house, looking around. Kimiko's baking a batch of cookies and Kasumi's sat at the table in the kitchen with her laptop out doing some work and idly chatting to her mother.

"Akane?"

Akane ignores them, looking through the house. The tugging feeling leads her to the genkan, and she wonders a moment. Then she looks behind her at Kimiko, who stands there with her hands full of a mixing bowl. "Go on, dear. One last time." Her mother smiles at her encouragingly. "You know how I've always told you to follow your instincts and I can see something's grabbing you."

Akane nods, slips her shoes on and runs out the house, following the feeling.

"Hey, Akane Tendou-san, right?"

Akane stops and stares at the girl that had just appeared in front of her. She's western by her looks, and stands taller than Akane's height, probably about 5 feet 8 or 9. Her skin's practically translucent it's so pale, and her veins stand out as they're almost completely black and purple. Purple eyes stare into Akane's brown, and the girl grins with sharp teeth.

"Um… Yes?"

The girl's smile grows wider. "Hi! I'm Rachel, Rachel Turner." She hefts the thing in her arms, which appears to be a tiny shoggoth. It chirps. "This is-" She makes a noise for two minutes solid that sounds like a dial-up modem connecting. "…But I call him Bob for short. I'm a magical girl."

"You're a magical girl." Akane's tone is flat and Rachel laughs.

"Yep! Don't fuckin' look like one but trust me. Transformation sequence and everything! Anyway, you're looking for that cute redhead, Ranko, right?"

Akane stares and then nods. "…Yeah. How do you know?"

"Magical girl stuff." Rachel laughs and puts Bob on her head, the little thing curling into a bucket hat and appearing to go to sleep. Rachel sticks her hands in the front pocket of her purple hoodie, but not before Akane can see the purple crystal talons where her fingernails should be. "Technically I'm "Magical Girl Desco-Chan. I fuse with Bob here and become a tentacly… monster girl, I guess. It's really fuckin' weird looking so don't ask me to do it without reason out here with the normies."

Akane looks confused but then shrugs. "Alright. I hope your skirt isn't too short. It's nice to see it in manga but real life…"

Rachel grimaces. "It's no Sailor Scout outfit but trust me, being a tentacly monster girl is bad enough for the jokes. Anyway!" She brightens. "Kicking demon arse is great fun!" She shrugs and then looks serious. "But you were looking for her, right?"

"Yeah." Akane says. "She just… disappeared."

"She didn't want to be a burden on anyone. Personally, I think she's being fucking stupid but what do I know? I'm only three hundred years old and dealt with guys with low self-esteem like her most of that time."

"Three… hundred?"

"What? Oh, yeah. Don't ask. Anyway, sorry. Always was easily distracted. Ranko. Poor kid, she woke up a new person and was barely formed when she made her wish. We told her there'd be consequences but she's a stubborn little thing." Rachel laughs, "Impressively stubborn. Buuuut also has all the self-esteem of a dead gnat so eh. Anyway, you heard of the 'ghost of Nerima' or the 'Angel of Nerima'?"

"It's her?"

"Bingo!" Rachel grins. "She's staying in the commercial district at the moment, though she did wander around a bit. Even fought a couple of Youma that started bothering her, though she never starts the fights I'd noticed."

Akane starts as if to run and Rachel smiles at her, waving. "Go get 'er, tiger."

The magical girl watches the short-haired girl run off and plucks her chibi-shoggoth from her head. "I think she'll be fine, Bob." Chirp, "Yeah, well, this Akane doesn't seem to be too hung up on things. Maybe they'll finally fuckin' get together this time. And if not, she'll be with her family again." Chirp chirp. "Yeah. Well, I just hope the poor kid's not entirely gone. To still be cooking in your personality and then to not exist… Eeesh." Chirp. "We've done all we can. Already not looking forwards to the convo with the bureaucracy, you know how those idiots are."

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Three months.

It's been three months, Ranko finds, and somehow she's survived on water and the little food she's able to scrounge or that she's occasionally been handed on the few times that Konatsu's managed to catch her. The kunoichi doesn't seem to be quite as skilled as she had been before, and Ranko wonders if it's because Ukyou maybe rescued her early?

Either way there have been occasions where she's had to shake the persistent girl after having had a small okonomiyaki dumped into her lap when she sits on a bench.

Somehow, it's let her survive this long, but she's starting to feel it more and more and she sees the girl less and less. Her battle aura is harder to call up, her chi sluggish, her movements not as quick, and it turns out that when you fight gang members who somehow have guns, that that slowness can stop you in your tracks.

She's caught off-guard by a trio of idiots who come to the alley she was vaulting to her attic from and is surrounded quickly. She calls up her battle aura and it flickers in her vision, and she knows that this is real danger. She's past the point where she can trust her speed, especially with the one who has a gun pointing it right at her.

She frowns at them, shaking her head, the much longer pigtail of her hair brushing her back. "G-gentlemen. This is a mistake." She says softly, trying to spook them.

The fight is brutal and short, and she finds herself hitting them harder than she normally would, trying to get their pressure points, but they get their own hits in, which has been happening more and more often.

She staggers back as she drops two of them, then the click of the pistol in the last one's hand brings her to look at him. He points it at her and his finger squeezes on the trigger.

Akane, running through the district, hears a struggle that tells her there's a fight going on, and she rounds the corner to an alleyway as there's a loud 'crack' and a small burst of light in the darkening evening. She gasps at what she sees.

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I really am an evil person for cliff-hangers. But here comes the sun.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 9 - Sunrise

I wake up, it's a bad dream,
No one on my side, I was fighting,
But I just feel too tired to be fighting,
Guess I'm not the fighting kind.

Wouldn't mind it if you were by my side,
But you're long gone, yeah, you're long gone now, yeah,
Where do we go?
I don't even know,

My strange old face,
And I'm thinking about those days,
And I'm thinking about those days.

- "A Bad dream" by Keane

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Akane catches the last moments of Ranko defending herself. The two men on the ground groan, their bodies locked up from pressure points.

The final thug, the gun in his hand pointed to the sky, looks disbelievingly at the petite redhead that has his hands clasped in her own before she wrenches the hands away from the gun and kicks it away, jabbing the man in the legs, then the hips and finally the back, sending him tumbling down, too.

Ranko's left standing, panting, on shaky legs. She falls to her knees. Akane can see her battle aura guttering, flickering like a candle in the wind. Then she looks up at the top of the alleyway and jumps. Akane tracks her as she crawls into a small hole up there, somehow not noticing the short-haired girl. Akane bites her lip and considers a moment. That battle aura looked unhealthy, and the girl looked worse than she'd ever seen anyone, but she can't leave these idiots here.

She grabs all three by the scruff of the neck as well as the gun, making sure she doesn't touch it directly, then dumps them in front of the police box. The officer looks shockedly at her and she shakes her head.

"The Angel did it, but she looked so weak when she'd finished…" Akane says. "I'm going to get her and take her home."

The officer swallows and nods at the unhappy martial artist in front of him and starts dealing with the knocked-out thugs as Akane makes her way to the alley and climbs slowly up the wall to the hole, peering in. She tries not to make any noise.

Ranko's curled up on a filthy bedroll, a ratty pack nearby and she's clutching a plastic wrapper holding something green. The girl's on her side and Akane stares at how thin she is.

She hears Ranko's voice, weak and tired and defeated.

"No one should die in pain… But all I've known is… Since then… Since the wish… But she's so beautiful, mother. She shines." A hiccupping sob, "Mother… Mother… I… I hope I see you soon…" Ranko curls up more tightly. "I'm sorry, I ruined everything. But she's better at least. I can… I can go knowing tha…" She trails off as she passes out and her aura starts to gutter again.

Akane doesn't even consciously register she's moving until she encircles the petite redhead in her arms, drawing her into a bridal carry. She walks to the open pack, kneeling and supporting Ranko on her knees while she works with her free hand, and peers in. A tatty, threadbare Fuurinkan High uniform and ratty, patched PE uniform, all dirty. A bookbag and a couple of school textbooks, and a water bottle that's mostly crushed plastic at this point. And that's all the girl has. The crinkling of plastic reminds her of the green package, and she looks at it to see it's a pair of pyjamas, cotton with satin trim, and an orchid pattern running up it.

She puts these in the pack and looks at the emaciated girl on her knee.

She comes to a decision, flipping her phone out of a pocket and texting her mother to prepare for a guest, then looks at Ranko's meagre possessions. The filth and the rattiness of it all makes her want to cry, but she takes in a deep breath and lets it out, centering herself.

Akane bundles it all into the pack as she takes it down and slings it over her shoulder. She keeps Ranko in her arms, balanced and secure, and takes off at a brisk pace, hopping down without realising how far she'd jumped down, as intent on her goal as she is.

Ranko comes to, the headache from her hunger gnawing at the top of her head already there. She's being carried in strong arms; she can feel the muscle holding her rock steady. For a dizzying moment she thinks it's Ryouga, her Ryouga, come through time and space and desperation to find her, like a gallant knight. Then she hears the different heartbeat, feels the press of a bust against her side and the scent of cherry blossoms and lily of the valley, and she realises it's a girl carrying her.

She looks up groggily and sees brown eyes cast down at her, lips pursing.

"…Akane…" Ranko breathes softly. Then she remembers who she is to the girl now. No one.

She really is just a jibakurei now.

"…Sorry. Tendou-san." Ranko says after a moment, shuddering. She wiggles to try to get out of Akane's grip. She doesn't deserve this. She shouldn't be imposing on Akane. She wished her life with Akane away. "Please let me go…"

Akane's arms tighten around her and she wonders a moment if Akane might not be stronger than she is now, especially with Ranko being so malnourished.

"Hello Ranko-chan." The short-haired girl says to her. "I'm taking you home. 'No' isn't an acceptable answer. You need, in order, a bath, food, water, clothes and comfortable sleep. And I'm going to make sure you get them."

"Mmh." Ranko struggles some more, but she's so weak from hunger that all she does is wiggle some. "Let me go!"

"Not an option, Ranko-chan." Akane growls.

"Please, please let me go!" She wriggles some more. "I don't deserve… I was so close…"

"Ranko-chan, you're coming and that's final. You can leave once you're better but right now you need somewhere to stay that's safe while you recover."

"I can…"

"No, you can barely move as it is." Akane says, hefting her. "Now, stop arguing with me, baka."

Ranko goes quiet, shuddering in Akane's arms. Eventually she shyly puts her arms about Akane's neck to steady herself and buries her head against the short-haired girl's chest, listening to the heartbeat.

"Ranko-chan?" Akane's voice is unsure, not at all like the confident young woman she sees in place of her constantly down, constantly angry friend. "Why did you… why did you lie to me? To all of us? About having a home? About your food? Who are you, really?"

Ranko feels the hot flush of shame, mixed with her usual bitterness and loneliness. She sighs, tears falling from her eyes again. "I'm no one. I d-don't deserve the h-help. I d-d-did all of th-this to myself. I gave up my existence. I h-have to bear the burden myself."

Akane looks curiously down at the light girl in her arms. "What?"

Ranko closes her eyes. "It doesn't matter, Tendou-san." She says wearily. "All you need to know is that I had to give up my existence so my family could be happy. Why should I make anyone else pay the price for associating with me?"

Akane frowns as Ranko seems to drop off again and her mind whirls. The misery she hears in the petite redhead's voice, the defeated, lonely attitude rubs her the wrong way. It makes her want to scream, to grab the girl by the shoulders and shake her. Tell her that people care about her.

But the truth is that aside from her and Nabiki's curiosity, most people had already forgot about the redhead's passing involvement in Fuurinkan High by now. And as Nabiki had found no trace in any system of the girl, who thought she was just a spirit hanging around the place of her death, she'd be lying if she said there were people who cared outside of herself, her family (via Akane), Yuka and Sayuri.

Akane decides she's going to get a whole bunch of people to care about the girl.

She brightens as she reaches the genkan of the Tendou compound and uses her foot to knock on the door. It slides open and her mother is there, peering at her, with Nabiki and Kasumi standing behind. They look shocked to see the filthy, emaciated girl in her arms and the ratty pack on her shoulder.

"Mom, let's get her into the warmth." Akane says, stepping in. She slips off her shoes and into her house slippers, though she doesn't take Ranko's shoes off as she has a feeling the girl hadn't been bathing. The smell is already bad enough from her walk back, so she decides to take the girl to the bath right away.

"You found her, sis?" Nabiki asks, looking at Ranko. "Kami-sama, she's so thin."

"She's sick, too, I think. She's burning up." Kasumi has her hand on the girl's forehead. Ranko moans in pain as she comes to, staring with wide eyes at her former family.

She blinks. Then a woman with the gentle face of Kasumi, the chocolate brown eyes of Akane and the light brown hair of Nabiki (though in a bun rather than a bob) is looking worriedly at her. "A-are you…" Ranko's hand reaches out. "A-are you… Akane's mother?"

Kimiko looks quizzically at Akane and then back at Ranko, nodding. "Yes."

Ranko slumps in Akane's arms. "Oh, that's good." She whispers. "Now I know it wasn't… wasted. Now I can…" And she's out.

Akane hefts the slight girl. "Mom, let's get some tea down her with sugar in it. I'll get her to drink it, which should keep her going a little. Then I'm going to get her cleaned up."

"I'll call Toufu. But hold on the tea. If she's been starving, we'll need something small but that will keep her going – some salts, some fuel for her body. Sugar will only make things worse." Kasumi says, all business. "Toufu was coming over tonight anyway to see me, but I'll make him aware we have an emergency. From what I can see she's extremely malnourished, and she looks like she's got some infected wounds. Her temperature is all over the place as well, but I don't know if that's the malnourishment or an illness or just the infection."

"I'll… look through her things." Nabiki nods, "See if I can't find any identification or next of kin or something."

Akane sighs. "Alright, Nabiki, but I don't think you will. I think… I think she's alone." She drops the pack onto the floor and carries Ranko into the family room, sitting and keeping the girl on her lap.

Kimiko walks in with a cup of something Akane remembers her having to drink when she'd had a really bad stomach bug flu, and Akane gently sets the cup to her lips, trying to coax Ranko to drink.

It takes some doing, and Ranko's only half-awake the whole time while Kimiko hovers.

Soun puts a hand on Kimiko's shoulder and then brings her close as they watch Akane try to nurse the red-haired girl.

"Soun." Kimiko says, and the Tendou patriarch looks at his wife curiously. "Soun, she's the angel I saw at the foot of my bed."

Soun looks between them. "She is?"

"I'm certain."

Soun looks confused.

"I thought you dreamed her?"

"So did I." Kimiko says, her voice unsure as she watches her youngest try to take care of Ranko. Nabiki brings in a bottle of water and a banana.

"I heard things like this are good for recovering, from what I found from a quick search." The bob-haired girl comments

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Akane carries Ranko into the furoba and though she weakly struggles to try to take her clothes off, it's clear that the girl's strength isn't what it was. Akane sighs and gently helps the red-haired girl undress, then sits her on a stool and starts scrubbing away what seems to be months' worth of accumulated grime.

Ranko is silent the entire time except for the occasional gasp as Akane accidentally brushes one of her bruises or wounds. Akane almost begins crying as she sees more of Ranko's body under the dirt. The ribs standing out, hip bones standing out, the skin parchment thin and unhealthy-looking. Sores and blotches. Bruises, too.

As she's starting to finish up, the water about the drain a horrible black colour mixed with some pink, Kimiko comes in with some towels she puts nearby.

"How is she doing?"

Akane sighs. "She's very weak, Mom. I don't know how awake she is but she's not saying anything."

Kimiko purses her lips. "Well, we'll let her soak once you've got her clean, then we'll clean those wounds and disinfect as much as we can. I'll get Kasumi to bring some of your clothes since you're a closer fit than she, I or Nabiki."

"Thanks, Mom." Akane says quietly. She keeps scrubbing Ranko's back gently with the soft cloth.

Kimiko watches a moment longer then walks back out, running into Nabiki and Kasumi en route. The girl with the bobbed hair has a disgusted expression on her face.

"Did you find anything?" Kasumi asks, falling into step. Kimiko looks between them

"Nothing, onee-chan." Nabiki grumbles. "Literally all she has is a water bottle, the bedroll, a bookbag with ratty text books, a bedroll, some weirdly pristine pyjamas in plastic and these." She holds up the tattered uniforms. Kasumi blinks as one of the patches on it looks oddly familiar.

"Let me see that." She says, taking the dress. She runs a hand over the patch. "This is mine."

Nabiki stares. "What?"

"Yes, definitely. This is my stitching and... aha." Kasumi turns the dress inside out and shows her a label on the seam. "I always mark here if it's mine."

"Why does she have your old uniforms?" Kimiko wonders.

Kasumi shrugs. "I don't know, Mom, I had thrown these out, and if she is homeless, perhaps she saw it as an opportunity?"

Nabiki shakes her head. "There's something more going on here, I can feel it."

Back in the furoba, Akane finishes scrubbing Ranko as best she can. She moves onto the red hair, undoing the single pigtail slowly and letting the curls loose. The pigtail is down to the small of her back, so it's little surprise to Akane that the ragged red curls reach her backside when unbound.

Akane stares in despair at the matted mess and then sighs. Ranko is still as noncommunicative as she had been, though she's definitely awake. Akane takes a brush and starts teasing as much of the mats away as she can, gently holding the hair above the mat so it doesn't tug.

It takes a not-inconsiderable amount of time for her to sort the hair out and by the time she's done she's more or less got enough hair accumulated on the hairbrush for a wig. But the curls aren't tangled and matted anymore.

She starts lathering shampoo into Ranko's hair and the girl seems almost to come alive as she massages it to her scalp, letting out an adorable noise. Akane smiles softly. "You okay?"

Ranko shivers and then says a single word. "No."

Akane shakes her head and grabs the shower head, pouring water onto Ranko's head to start rinsing the shampoo away.

As before the water cascades down practically black from accumulated dirt. "How long is it since you had a bath, Ranko-chan?" She asks.

Ranko thinks. "Three months. I think. I took a dip in the river a few times." Her voice is quiet, rusty, as if she's barely used it.

"So… you've not properly bathed since I saw you last? Why?"

Ranko shrugs. "I'm not w-worth it. If I'm not real, why should I care for myself?"

Akane frowns. "You're right here."

Ranko shakes her head. "But I'm not a real person. Not anymore. I gave that up."

Akane sighs. "This again." She says. "You're as real as me, Ranko-chan." She picks the shampoo bottle up again and starts lathering it into the girl's hair. "Else I couldn't do this."

Ranko sighs softly, shuddering again. "You wouldn't… shouldn't understand. No one else should ever have to understand."

It takes shampooing her hair three times before the water's clear and soapy coming off. Akane despairs momentarily at how the previously vibrant red hair seems so lifeless and dull as she starts massaging conditioner into the curls. "…Your hair was so nice, Ranko-chan. When we're done we'll get some masks and reconstructors for you, see if we can't perk it up."

Once she's done rubbing in conditioner, she grabs a hair tie from nearby and pulls the red curls into a sloppy bun atop Ranko's head. "We'll leave it in while we soak, then I'll rinse for you. Might do it some good." She helps Ranko to her feet, but the girl seems able to stand on her own after a moment. Akane still helps her to the furo though, and sits her down in it, then gets in too after washing herself down.

Ranko is looking at the water, her face a mask of pain and sorrow, her eyes hollow. Akane looks at her and sighs. "What's wrong?"

"I shouldn't be here." Ranko whispers, staring into the steaming water. "I don't belong here. I don't deserve to be here."

Akane bites her lip. "I think you're in the right place, Ranko-chan." She says confidently. Ranko shakes her head.

"No… My price was to be alone."

"What price?"

Ranko goes silent and closes her eyes. "The price of happiness for others."

"It doesn't make me happy to see you alone." Akane says. "It makes me really sad."

Ranko shakes her head. "But that's me making you unhappy. If I wasn't here, you'd be better."

Akane purses her lips. She wants to grab Ranko, to shake her and tell her that's not true, but she senses it would do more harm than good, especially with her fragile condition.

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Kimiko takes the filthy, ragged overalls that Ranko had been wearing and looks forlornly at them. She might be able to salvage them if they don't fall to pieces in the washing. They're very familiar though, and she can't figure out why until she heads into Akane's room to find some clothes that might fit the redheaded girl. Akane's probably the closest in size to Ranko, though wasted as she is she won't be filling them out.

Kimiko looks through the wardrobe and finds an orange blouse and a pink pair of overalls with 'CHINA' emblazoned on them. Akane'd never worn them; they'd been an impulse buy from a thrift store and Akane had found they didn't really suit her but had still kept them for some reason. 'Nostalgia', she'd said, but she hadn't elaborated.

By the look on her daughter's face, Kimiko didn't think Akane even know what she meant.

She looks between the dirty, ragged clothes and the new ones and blinks in confusion. The outfit is identical. Raising an eyebrow, she looks at the tag on both sets and sees the exact same kanji denoting that they're Akane's. The other eyebrow joins its sibling.

"Oh my." Kasumi says, looking at them alongside her mother. They both know Akane only had the one set, and besides, the kanji on the label is identical, right down to a slight splodge of ink next to it. If she had to hazard a guess, they were the exact same pair of overalls, only more worn, ragged and filthy. The blouse is the same.

Nabiki knocks on the side of the door. "What you up to, guys?" She asks.

"Look at these, Nabiki." Kasumi says, pointing to the two sets of clothes. "They're identical."

Nabiki stares and shakes her head. "What on earth…?" Checking them over, she comes to the same conclusion as Kasumi and Kimiko. "…But what does it mean?"

"Akane said she was mumbling something about giving up her existence…" Kimiko says thoughtfully.

Kimiko sighs. "We'll ask her when she's better – and only then, girls, OK?"

"Sure, Mom." Nabiki says, rolling her eyes. She's not going to interrogate a practically dead girl, even if the mystery is really bothering her.

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And we're past the worst bit. It's not plain sailing from here, not with poor Ranko's many, many issues. But now she can begin to heal.

You guys have no idea how glad I am to be past all that misery. Writing it took such a toll on my mood.

Get you a girl like Akane.

 

[Strawberry]

Chapter 10 - The Intolerable Weight of Living

Nothing left beside this old cathedral,
Just the sad, lonely spires,
How do you make it right?
Oh, but you try.

- Is It Any Wonder by Keane

CONTENT WARNING: Suicidal desires, ideation and thoughts and extremely poor mental health ahead.

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Akane helps Ranko out of the furo and starts drying the emaciated redhead, towelling her gently so as not to cause further damage to the sores and wounds on her body. Ranko's gone incommunicative again, her eyes full of a hollow misery.

Akane's heart sinks as she sees the expression on her friend's face and she almost cries there and then. But Ranko would take it as further proof she's making Akane's life worse.

The door to the furoba opens and Kimiko moves in with the new clothes, Akane eyeing the pink overalls and knowing they'll suit the short girl far more than they ever did her.

She has the medical kit as well, and kneels next to the two of them, pulling out disinfectant, swabs, tweezers, cotton balls and some muscle bruise balm that Toufu makes for them that they all swear by.

"Hello there, Ranko-chan. I'm Tendou Kimiko." She says warmly to the redhead. Internally she's as upset as her daughter as she looks the girl up and down for the first time properly. Her ribs stand in sharp relief against her skin, which is waxy, pale and thin. Blotches, bruises and sores dot it, along with some poorly healed wounds. There are scars across some of the skin as well – tiny thin lines, as if from claws or something, though these look long healed.

Her hips stand out as well, and Kimiko wonders how close to starving to death the small girl actually is.

Ranko doesn't respond to her, just staring at the ground from the stool on which she sits, not even caring about being unclothed in front of what they think are strangers to her. Kimiko sighs. She hopes it doesn't become full catatonia.

"I'm going to clean and dress those sores, Ranko-chan, then rub some balm onto those bruises that will help. I've got some small amount of food for you that Kasumi says will help keep you going, but we'll need to feed you small amounts very regularly until we're sure your body can start handling proper quantities of food again, OK?"

Not even a nod. Or a blink. Ranko's silence and lack of response is unnerving, but her eyes do flick between Kimiko and Akane and her lips seem to be making the shapes for a sound repeated, without actually making the sound.

Kimiko sighs again and picks the cotton balls up, spotting them in alcohol and starting to rub at the sores. Some of them bleed and she hisses when the sharp alcohol burns against them. Kimiko takes the response as a good sign but still tries to be careful. Some of the worst cuts she cleans and bandages, and then finally starts rubbing the balm over the bruises. Ranko shivers at the direct touch as Akane helps keep her sat upright.

"Why are you doing this?" Ranko asks suddenly, eyes alive once more, dull blue staring into Kimiko's brown.

"You're my daughter's friend and you need help." Kimiko says instantly back.

"I could have gone." Ranko mumbles. "I was so close to being free."

"Free?"

"I could see them again." Ranko says. Kimiko frowns at the non sequitur. "Lost due to a wish/The Changeling finally gone/My suffering ends."

A death poem. Kimiko realises. She swears in her head.

"Ranko-chan…" Akane says softly, her eyes filling with tears. The blue eyes flick to her.

"Let me die." The redhead breathes, slumping on the stool like a puppet with strings cut. "I'm so tired. You don't even have to do any death rites for me, just leave me somewhere the scavengers can get me, and I won't be anyone's problem anymore. There's no place for me."

The slap is gentle, pulled of almost all its force due to the girl's fragile condition, but it might as well have been made of iron given how much Ranko reels from it.

Kimiko glares at the girl. "None of that nonsense anymore, young lady. I'm not letting you die and if I did my daughter would probably send me to follow you quickly."

Akane starts, but they're both interrupted by Ranko's sharp "NO."

Kimiko blinks at the force behind that quiet, rusted voice.

"You won't die. Not after all I…" Ranko clams up, her head bows and the momentary strength she had leaves her. "Never mind. Do what you must. I promised someone very dear to me who is gone I wouldn't kill myself. But I won't stop the inevitable happening. I'm so tired of it all."

Kimiko watches as she seems to deflate before Akane picks the clothes up and hands them to the redhead. "Get dressed, Ranko-san, and then you are staying with us." Her tone brooks no arguments.

She and Akane exit the furoba and both sit nearby on the floor, waiting for Ranko to change.

"She's really bad." Kimiko says. "Worse than I've ever seen anyone. Worse than No-chan was after she lost…" She stiffens a moment and casts a glance to the closed door as a thought occurs to her. Then she stops, shaking her head.

"Her baby, you mean?" Akane asks quietly.

"Yes. Your auntie was very bad afterwards, it took a lot to get her back up. Eventually after that awful ex-husband of hers was too nasty and she divorced him I made her live with us and help raise you three. That seemed to make her a lot better."

"Poor Auntie." Akane sighs. She brightens. "Hey, you think she'd want to adopt Ranko?"

"Not wanting her as a Tendou?"

Akane blushes. "I don't want her for a sister, Mom." She says. "She can be a Tendou in due time."

Kimiko pats her shoulder. "My daughter the optimist. Well, good luck. You'll both need it."

The door to the furo slides open and Ranko totters out on unsteady feet, the clothes hanging off her thin form. The lifeless, hopeless look is back in her eyes and all she does is stare at the floor as the two Tendou women stand.

Ranko promptly falls bonelessly to the floor, Akane managing to catch her in time to stop her hitting her head. "Ranko!" Akane gasps, cradling the unconscious redhead. "Mom…"

"Bring her to the family room, we'll keep her here for now unless Toufu recommends the hospital."

Akane moves quickly, and they find the rest of the family sans Nodoka sitting, watching the engawa where they would be coming from. Kasumi's eyes soften sadly as Akane sits down at the table, Ranko on her lap again and seeing the food that's been set there. She nods to her youngest sister.

"Toufu recommended these in this quantity to help start her system again." Kasumi says. "We have to be careful else she'll get refeeding syndrome, and that would be… bad."

"How bad?"

"She would probably not survive." Toufu says, slipping into the room. Kasumi smiles and stands, pecking him on the cheek and he smiles back before putting his case down next to Akane and kneeling. "How is she?"

"Bad." Akane admits, biting her lip. "She just fainted, and she's pretty noncommunicative. I um…" She pauses, wondering whether to say or not and then barrels on. "She wants to die, Toufu-sensei." Akane's eyes fill with tears again. "She gave us a death poem and told us to leave her for scavengers. I don't think she's going to be OK even if she recovers physically."

Toufu frowns as he opens his medical bag and spends a few minutes checking the girl over.

"She's extremely weak and I'm not liking her heartbeat." He says as Akane cradles the redhead on her lap. "I think we should take her to the hospital for a few tests and checks. Depending on what they find, she could be in for monitoring for a few days or it might be longer. She's definitely not well, but it might simply be the malnourishment. If that's the case, we'll probably see her back here soon enough."

Akane looks to Toufu. "She doesn't officially exist, Toufu-sensei." She clutches the girl more protectively to her. "What will they do when they find that out?"

He shrugs. "I don't know, Akane-chan. I will pay for her if they demand a full payment." Akane blinks.

"Really?"

"I won't let someone that this family cares about down." He says determinedly. "Besides which I'd take her on as a patient. I'm sure I can sort it out."

"Thank you, onii-chan. I'm going to make sure she stays with us." Akane says softly. He smiles at her.

"Want to take her home, do you?"

Akane blushes.

Kimiko clears her throat. "Akane, please try rousing her and getting her to eat and drink the food. I'll have your father call a taxi, unless you think an ambulance is warranted, Toufu-kun?"

Toufu smiles as he sits next to Kasumi, the eldest sister settling her head on his shoulder gently. "I think a taxi will be fine, she's not currently in immediate danger, but she is very close. If Akane-chan hadn't gone to find her tonight… I fear it would have been heading towards too late."

Everyone around shudders at that statement.

Ranko's eyes open slowly and she regards the world around her blankly a moment. She's being held by someone warm, a feminine voice nearby.

Akane. She thinks.

She looks around properly and sees a familiar doctor, Kasumi's head on his shoulder, his arm around her. "Doctor… Toufu…" She mutters to herself. His eyes flick to her and narrow in thought as Akane helps her sit up. She keeps Ranko on her lap, though, the redhead too weak to really hold herself up.

"…Sorry." Ranko says softly. "I'm a burden."

Akane sucks in a breath but doesn't respond. Instead she reaches forward and pulls the first of the foods Ranko only now can smell.

Ranko would feel insulted that Akane's trying to feed her, but right now she can barely move, so she accepts the feeding with mechanical movements.

Kasumi watches the young girl eat, a deadness in her eyes she's never seen in anyone. Toufu, too, looks distinctly unhappy and she kisses his cheek gently. "I think she needs help." The eldest sister says softly into her fiancé's ear.

He nods. "Professional. I'll see if Mitaka-sensei is able to… if I can somehow wrangle paperwork for someone who doesn't officially exist."

Kasumi sighs as Nabiki watches the proceedings.

Akane continues to feed Ranko the small amount of food that Toufu had advised for her to eat that would help start her back up, but not kill her. Once it's done, Ranko seems to slip away into unconsciousness, needing some prodding by Akane to wake up again and drink the blackcurrant-flavoured drink that had been made, designed to replenish salts and other nutrients.

Ranko doesn't drop off again, but she doesn't respond to any attempts at conversation, her eyes blank. That is, until someone mentions Nodoka.

Ranko's eyes seem to come alive. "Sh-she lives here?" Her voice is as quiet and disused as before.

Nabiki nods to the emaciated girl. "Yes, she's our Auntie. She helped raise us. Why, do you know her?"

Ranko's eyes show that same black pit of depression. "Not anymore." She says softly. "No one knows me anymore anyway."

"Did we?" Nabiki presses.

"Nabiki!" Kimiko scolds. "We talked about pressing her while she's still ill."

Nabiki falls silent, looking ashamed. "Sorry, Ranko-san."

"S'ok…" Ranko says, leaning back on Akane as if the conversation had exhausted her.

Her mind a-whirl, her brain feeling scratchy and the gnawing, drilling headache not really sated by the tiny amount of food she's eaten, Ranko drops out again.

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She comes to in a bed, her back itching. Well, all her skin contacting clothes itching. Her eyes open slowly, like rusted garage doors and she stares at the kind of ceiling you find in a hospital. There's a steady beeping rhythm nearby and she notes she has some sensors on her chest. She's in a hospital gown.

She notes all of this with idle curiosity but doesn't really comprehend until wakefulness mostly returns. She tries to sit up, but finds her arms are attached to the bed. She makes a frustrated noise.

A mop of dark blue-black hair raises from the side of the bed it had been napping on and reveals itself to be attached to Akane, who looks blearily at Ranko before registering she's awake.

"Ranko-chan." She says softly, a pain in her voice. Ranko's heart tightens and the beeping nearby speeds up a little before settling back down. Akane looks at the machine, then at Ranko and shakes her head.

"Why am I restrained?" Her voice is still quiet and slow, but there's more force in it again.

"I-I told them about you wanting to die. They th-thought it would…"

Ranko looks down at the bed. "Oh." She says.

Akane sighs. "I can undo them if you want, but you need to promise me you're going to stay here while they test you and stuff, and then come home with me until you're better."

"Why?" Ranko asks.

"Why what?"

"Why are you helping me? I'm just a nobody. I don't exist. I gave that up. I made my wish, and I gave being a person up. I'm just a jibakurei. I was so close to being done." Her voice is cold and hollow and gives Akane chills just listening to it.

"Because even if you don't officially exist, I like you. Sayuri and Yuka like you. You're our friend, and you're hurting, and I won't let that stand." Akane stands on the side of the bed. Somehow, she seems taller than she had before. "And it's a martial artist's duty to protect the weak, and that's you right now."

Ranko looks back down at the bed again. "…I'm just a husk. Trust me, Akane-san. I am not worth your time or effort. No one will mourn me when I am gone."

"I will." Akane says, taking one of Ranko's hands. She notes the other one is attached to some form of IV drip. "I'd miss you. I've missed you this past three months."

"Why?"

"Do I have to explain it again?" Akane's temper starts fraying. "I'm not explaining it again. I care about you. End of. No discussion on that." Ranko tries to recoil from the anger, so much like the older self she wished away, but the restraints on her hands stop her. Akane notices and runs a hand through her hair. "…Sorry. Sorry. I've got a bad temper. Shouldn't take it out on you." She puts her hand on the restraints. "Ranko-chan, do you agree to stay here while you're needed and then with my family while you recover?"

Ranko stays looking at her bed. "…I'll go when I'm better." She says softly. "Great-Grandmother told me I only bring pain if I go to the places I used to be."

Akane eyes her strangely. This again. Something nags at her. She shakes her head. "So you'll stay then?"

Ranko looks up, eyes dead again. "I suppose." She says emotionlessly.

Akane squeezes her hand. "Don't forget, missy, you owe me a date too, and it'd better be a really good one since you skipped out on the last." She tries to lighten the mood. Ranko's mouth twitches, and the heart monitor beeps slightly faster a moment, but not much else happens.

Ranko nods and leans back as Akane undoes the restraints. "I'll tell the doctors you're awake." She says to the emaciated redhead, and Ranko nods, leaning back and looking at the ceiling.

Akane exits out of the room.

A battery of tests and a whirlwind of doctors coming and going that sends Ranko's current poor following of time spinning later and she's lying in the hospital bed. She's been given small meals and cups of a strange, sweet liquid.

She can't stand it. Why couldn't they let her die? She was so close to it, so close to seeing her family. Now she has to live. A broken, worthless thing.

She stole a body, and then in thanks turned around and completely destroyed the body's entire life.

What's even the point?

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Ranko lies on the futon in the guest room she'd spent so many months in with her father, staring at the ceiling.

She still feels weak. She's only been out of the hospital for a day or two after a week's stay – Akane had to carry her in because she could barely lift one leg in front of the other, and Akane's been doing a lot for her anyway.

She sighs. They shouldn't. She'll only bring pain to them; Cologne had said so.

Kimiko walks in and smiles down at Ranko and she tries to force a smile back, but Kimiko's sad expression shows it's probably closer to a grimace.

Ranko's caught sight of herself in a mirror and she knows she looks a fright. Her cheeks are sunken and when she looked at her body in the mirror, she could count her ribs. Not like you can sometimes by just touching, instead it's as if her skin's been vacuum-welded to them.

"How are you feeling, Ranko-chan?" Kimiko asks, kneeling by her with a tray that has a teacup and a glass of that strange, sweet liquid the hospital had given her.

Ranko struggles to sit up and Kimiko gently helps her, putting a cushion behind her back.

Ranko's in one of Kasumi's spare nighties, the voluminous garment practically drowning the redhead, though it's the only one that wasn't causing problems for her skin with her poor condition.

"Ranko-chan?" Kimiko asks again and Ranko blinks. She looks at the clock. She'd zoned out again.

"O-oh, s-sorry Tendou-san. I just… spaced out. I'm alright thank you." She says it hollowly, numbly. She can't afford to feel anymore. Everything hurts too much if she thinks about it.

"I see. Well, this should perk you a little, dear."

Ranko looks at Kimiko and smiles. She can see the resemblances to her three daughters so clearly sometimes. Sometimes it's Kasumi, sometimes she sees Nabiki's mischief, sometimes it's Akane's temper and streak of righteousness.

She loves it. Seeing Kimiko around, seeing Soun being alive, seeing Akane being so beautiful and confident and strong makes her think it was worth it.

The only thing she's unhappy about is that they won't let her die. She's done her job, she's confirmed they're all better. Why won't they just let her actually go and stop hanging around?

"Why can't you let me go? I was so close to being done." Ranko whispers, hands bunching the cotton nightgown. Kimiko starts and looks away sadly.

"Ranko, no. Death is not for you. I want you to live."

"But I don't want to live anymore. I don't belong anywhere. I don't have anyone."

"You have us."

Ranko doesn't answer, just looks at her thin legs under the blanket.

Kimiko sighs softly. "Ranko-chan. I know you don't like yourself. But we like you. Akane doesn't like people who are bad – she's a good judge of character. And I know you."

Ranko looks at her quizzically. "We hadn't met before Akane-san brought me here a week ago."

"Oh, we had, dear. You stood at the foot of my bed when I was dying, before I recovered so miraculously. You told me to love your family and that you left so I might live."

Ranko looks down. "…Oh." She says softly. A few tears plip onto her lap. Then she takes in a breath and the tears stop, that same blank expression returning. "At least you're alive." She says.

Kimiko frowns, but Ranko doesn't say anymore and she doesn't want to push the red-haired girl too far too fast, at least while she's recovering in body. In mind… Kimiko's not so sure she ever will. There's just so much damage inside.

She sighs and gently strokes the red hair. "I have a friend with hair that's red like yours, Ranko-chan." She says conversationally while Ranko drinks down the cup and takes some of the food that she'd brought. She's still on the regimented diet of small meals often, three small meals a day plus a snack three times a day. Kimiko's sticking to it rigidly, and she's concerned Ranko doesn't seem to have started filling out again.

Then again, it might be that she's being rebuilt internally before she starts showing she's healthy outside. Given what she'd read of starvation… She shivers.

Ranko doesn't reply, but Kimiko presses on. "Well, kind of a dark auburn instead of your bright red. She's my best friend. Oh, she'd love you." Kimiko smiles. "She always wanted a daughter, and you look so much like her."

Ranko doesn't reply, but she finishes her food and looks at Kimiko with something approaching life in her eyes.

"I think she'd want to adopt you." Kimiko smiles into Ranko's eyes, but the girl doesn't respond. "Well, it's an idle thought."

She picks the tray up, Ranko making as if to stand. Kimiko frowns but helps her to her feet. The redhead stands on wobbly legs, leaning on Kimiko. She doesn't speak but Kimiko knows where she wants to go.

She helps Ranko down the stairs and lets the girl totter into the family room, holding onto the wall for support, and leans against the wall. Akane's in there and helps Ranko to sit down, the redhead leaning on her.

Akane ignores the silence and just lets her friend lean on her while they watch TV.

Eventually, Akane helps the girl back up the stairs where she lies on the futon again, staring at the ceiling. Akane watches a while – she'd not spoken the entire time she was downstairs, and only a mumbled thank you came as she put Ranko on the futon.

While she's walking past the kitchen, her mother heading towards the stairs, there's a hurried knocking at the door, and the doorbell rings again. Kimiko opens the door. "Hai, hai… No-chan? Why are you knocking? Don't you have your keys?"

Nodoka looks frantic. Her hair's spilling out of its bun and her kimono is ruffled. Kimiko's seen her out of sorts before but never like this.

"Kimiko, where is she?" Nodoka seizes her best friend's shoulders.

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Is it any wonder I'm tired?
Is it any wonder I feel uptight?
Is it any wonder I don't know what's right?
Oh, these days
After all the misery made
Is it any wonder that I feel afraid?
Is it any wonder that I feel betrayed?

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Another chapter that was very hard to write.

But the light on the horizon promises many things.