The most amusing part is that, if you consider this as a sort of inverted Mario game with [given koopa here] as the playable character, Bowser still winds up being the final boss because he doesn't actually want to leave.
 
[X] Ask if Toadstool would be willing to be your tour guide while you're kidnapping her.
-[X] If yes, ask her if there are any places she would recommend and if she needs a disguise so no one else kidnaps her while you're touring.
-[X] If no, properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
 
What?
*Checks Wiki*
...
I really hate retcons. The Koopalings, then. *mutters dark imprecations*

Well, again, according to Minion Quest*, the Koopalings' response to Bowser going missing is to knuckle down and work together. Because they can all agree that they're the only competent underlings Bowser has.

*And before anyone says anything, Minion Quest does not refer to any forum quest, but to a side mode in the Mario and Luigi Superstar Saga remake.
 
Votes are not locked.
Adhoc vote count started by Entropy Judge on Feb 15, 2020 at 8:05 AM, finished with 18 posts and 10 votes.

  • [X] Ask if Toadstool would be willing to be your tour guide while you're kidnapping her.
    -[X] If yes, ask her if there are any places she would recommend and if she needs a disguise so no one else kidnaps her while you're touring.
    -[X] If no, properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    [X] Properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    - [X] Accept any hospitality they offer.
    [x] Just drop Toadstool off on top of the castle.
    - [x] Go see Bowser's Castle. It looked like a good place to brood.
    [X] Properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    - [X] Decline offers of hospitality and go see Bowser's Castle.
 
[X] Ask if Toadstool would be willing to be your tour guide while you're kidnapping her.
-[X] If yes, ask her if there are any places she would recommend and if she needs a disguise so no one else kidnaps her while you're touring.
-[X] If no, properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
 
Votes are locked.( Testing)
Adhoc vote count started by Entropy Judge on Feb 16, 2020 at 9:41 AM, finished with 20 posts and 11 votes.

  • [X] Ask if Toadstool would be willing to be your tour guide while you're kidnapping her.
    -[X] If yes, ask her if there are any places she would recommend and if she needs a disguise so no one else kidnaps her while you're touring.
    -[X] If no, properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    [X] Properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    - [X] Accept any hospitality they offer.
    [x] Just drop Toadstool off on top of the castle.
    - [x] Go see Bowser's Castle. It looked like a good place to brood.
    [X] Properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.
    - [X] Decline offers of hospitality and go see Bowser's Castle.
 
Delivering a Princess
Ask if Toadstool would be willing to be your tour guide while you're kidnapping her.
- If yes, ask her if there are any places she would recommend and if she needs a disguise so no one else kidnaps her while you're touring.
- If no, properly escort Toadstool back into the castle.


"I don't suppose you feel up to giving us a brief tour, do you?" Hatate gives you a look, free from the princess's attention. "I mean, we're kidnapping you, but we don't really know a whole lot about this area, and it would be silly if we accidentally returned you to a brewery or something instead of your home." Toadstool laughs and shakes her head.

"I live in the castle! And … well, I wouldn't mind giving you a tour, I suppose, if I could." She sighs as you raise an eyebrow. "To give a tour properly requires more than simply knowing about the places we're seeing – it requires planning to make sure that the places are accessible, that nothing else is being planned, that places are visited in the proper order." She shakes her head and sighs again. "And, even if I could just wave my hand and produce a list of appropriate places to take you right now, there is the slight matter of my appearance." You nod.

"We have a few other dresses, if it's simply a matter of clothing." She looks at you, then laughs merrily and shakes her head.

"Oh, it's not just clothing. You really are from very far away, if you don't know about Toads." Her good cheer fades, and she looks almost sad about not being able to give you a tour. "No, we would all stand out among them, and I am very well known; it wouldn't be possible for me to give you a tour. I'm sorry." You shrug lightly, making sure you don't rock the princess too much.

"Well, it was a spur-of-the-moment request, so don't feel too bad about it. Now, to the castle we go." You glide down over the castle itself, spiraling loosely around it, letting Hatate take pictures. The castle town looks quite civilized, very clean and well-maintained. Many of the buildings have oddly wide entrances – even houses have double doors as wide as they are tall, which is particularly peculiar given that many of the people you can see are rather short. How strange. A pair of guards in front of the castle stare as you land in front of them. Short fellows in light, flowing clothing, with mushroom-like headwear.

"P-P-P-P-!" Neither guard is able to speak as you set down Toadstool, but while one stammers uselessly, the other shoves open the doors and stands at trembling attention.

"Thank you, thank you," Toadstool says softly, and the first guard relaxes and scoots back to stand in front of the other door. "This way, please," she says to you, and you take your bag back from Hatate before following her into the castle. It's not too unpleasant a building, although the ceilings are lower than you would like. Servants and guards stop and stare, and Toadstool greets them all with a smile, a nod, a touch of the hand. You're starting to get why she laughed when you suggested a disguise, though. They aren't identical, but they're all very similar in appearance, and in many cases the differences are quite minor compared to differences between humans. If they're capable of recognizing the visual distinctions between each other, then disguising Toadstool would take a great deal of effort. After several minutes, Toadstool leads you into a long, bright room with refreshingly high ceilings. Another Toad, one that is actually noticeably distinct, stares happily. Not only are his clothes green and white instead of the red-white-blue aesthetic of the other Toads, but he also sports a mustache.

"Princess, you've returned! And -?" His smile vanishes as his eyes sweep to Toadstool's sides. It's not that he's ignoring you – his brows knit together in confusion when he focuses on you – but he's looking for something else. "Er, Princess, where is … did something happen to Mario?"

"I – I don't know, Chancellor. I haven't seen him. I was rescued by Aya and Hatate." The Chancellor's eyes widen, almost bulging out.

"Not – not rescued by Mario?! But, but that's – it's unheard-of! Princess, are you -"

"Chancellor, please." You hide a smile at the steel in her voice, and the Chancellor's mouth closes. "Regardless of the irregularities of the situation, they did rescue me." He takes a breath and nods, accepting the admonition.

"Of course, Princess, you are quite correct. I am simply … concerned about recent events. And, er … you said 'irregularities?' More than one?" Toadstool nods, and you notice several servants scurrying about behind you, the doors opening and closing quietly.

"Mario had already rescued me from Bowser," Toadstool begins, and everyone else leans in eagerly, "but before we could leave the castle, something crashed into it and launched us away. I did not see where Mario went, and I ended up at the Booster family tower, where the current Booster kept me, wishing to marry me." Her audience gasps in horror, and the Chancellor rubs his chin as he thinks.

"The Booster family …? But that's …." He frowns and paces back and forth for a few seconds before looking back at Toadstool. "Mario apparently was launched only back to his home, and when he returned here, he said the keep was unassailable. He then left to search for you, but just a little while after that, the Kingdom was attacked by these … peculiar bouncing creatures. Mario returned and drove them out, of course, and then went with a friend of his to Tadpole Pond to hopefully learn more about this disaster." Toadstool nods and walks over to a window, looking contemplative. The Chancellor looks worriedly at her for a moment, then smiles and looks past you. "Ah, they're ready. Please … um, honored guests! As part of our thanks for saving the Princess, please, enjoy your stay at the castle." You look back at the waiting servants; the curtsy politely, and you smile as you turn back to the Chancellor and bow.

"Thank you. It was our pleasure." He nods absently, watching you only until you start to turn away before returning his full attention to Toadstool. You and Hatate follow the servants to a very nice room, and after promising to return with something to eat, they leave you. You test the mattresses – nice and firm, with thick blankets and sheets – examine the fireplace, and lament the lack of openings for the windows, then turn back to Hatate as she stretches over one of the tables. "So, what do you think?" She claps her hands against her cheeks before responding.

"Well, it … feels different here. Not like Gensokyo, or Falmart, or the Earth that's connected to Falmart. The air is … I don't know. You can feel it, right?" You nod, and she looks down at the table and starts tracing designs on it with her finger. "Apart from that … I don't know. I mean, we just got here." You let your mask drop and giggle, shaking your head when she frowns at you.

"No, I meant – what do you think about what we should do!" She blushes and you fight to keep from laughing more loudly. Your bout of humor doesn't last long, however, and you sit down at her table when you get yourself under control. "So there's this castle that's apparently been attacked, and is currently unable to be attacked. There's this hero wandering around the countryside. And there's this kingdom. Not to mention the whole rest of the island." Hatate looks down at the table, then slides back so she's sitting in her chair, and rests her chin on laced fingers.

"Mmm … we probably shouldn't stay too long; I don't think that Chancellor person likes us a whole lot -" She breaks off and sits up as someone rapidly taps at the door, and before either of you get up it opens. Two servants carry platters in for you, curtsy, and withdraw, and you catch sight of a guard standing outside your door before they close it. You turn your attention to your food – some kind of bread, a meat stew, and a drink that smells rather like cucumbers, of all things. Hatate frowns at the stew for a long time before finally digging in. Altogether, it's really quite good. "... I think it's best if we avoid looking for their hero, at least for now. It's not what we're here for. And going out right after getting here seems like a bad decision. But I'm not sure what we really can do here while under their attention." You smile as you finish off your drink and lean back.


What do you do?

[ ] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.

[ ] You did ask for a tour; even if Toadstool herself can't take you, maybe she could get something set up for you.

[ ] It might be a bit rude, but you want to leave before too long.
- [ ] Go see Bowser's Castle.
- [ ] Go to the star-studded rock.

[ ] Other?
 
[X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
 
[x] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
 
[X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
 
[X] You did ask for a tour; even if Toadstool herself can't take you, maybe she could get something set up for you.

Get this set up, then hit the books.
 
Votes are not locked.
Adhoc vote count started by Entropy Judge on Feb 17, 2020 at 9:26 AM, finished with 5 posts and 5 votes.

  • [X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
    [X] You did ask for a tour; even if Toadstool herself can't take you, maybe she could get something set up for you.
 
Votes are not locked.( There is a tie)
Adhoc vote count started by Entropy Judge on Feb 18, 2020 at 9:33 AM, finished with 7 posts and 6 votes.

  • [X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
    [X] You did ask for a tour; even if Toadstool herself can't take you, maybe she could get something set up for you.
 
[X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
-[jk] Start making Koopa Kingdom invasion plans so you can kidnap Bowser
 
Votes are locked.
Adhoc vote count started by Entropy Judge on Feb 18, 2020 at 10:41 AM, finished with 10 posts and 8 votes.

  • [X] They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.
    [X] You did ask for a tour; even if Toadstool herself can't take you, maybe she could get something set up for you.
    [X] Hang out with peach and get to know her better.
 
Researching
They must have a library, or at least some kind of record-keeping area. See if you can see what's in there.


"Hmm … well, if we're going to be under their attention regardless, we could see about actually getting a tour." Hatate frowns as you study your fork. It has delicate engravings of crowns, stars, and mushrooms. "It's an option, especially since I did ask Toadstool about it and we are new here. I think I'd rather try for something a little less personal, though." Hatate tilts her head to one side, then finishes her drink. She looks more energized, just like you feel quite refreshed.

"A library?" You smile.

"Or some other kind of records area. If they're organized enough to be a kingdom, they must have something like that; it's just a bit big for purely oral record-keeping. And it shouldn't be hard for them to set up, either, and just requires someone to watch us if they really are suspicious." Hatate nods.

"But who do we ask? We probably can't ask the princess, but apart from her or the Chancellor, I haven't noticed anyone who looks different enough to be of a different status." You smile again and shrug, then stand up and open the door. There's a guard by your door, and while he seems startled by your appearance, he quickly smiles at you.

"Thank you for saving the Princess! Everyone's really grateful, and we were so worried because of everything else that's happened. Now that she's back, we just have to wait for Mario to beat Bowser again, and then everything will be back to normal!" You smile at his naivete. Not to mention the apparent fact that Bowser is a recurring problem, so 'normal' is probably an arbitrary term.

"Think nothing of it," you say cheerily, and his smile beams even more brightly. "Say, do you know if there's a library somewhere we can look through? We're strangers here, and books tell a lot about places." He frowns, deep in thought, and taps his foot.

"Mm, there is the royal library here in the castle, but I'm not sure if you're allowed there. It's normally open to anyone staying in the castle, but …." He looks down sheepishly, and you pat the top of his head – or hat, or whatever it is. It shifts slightly under your touch, so it's probably a hat, but there isn't a clear seam, so you're just going to stop thinking about it for a while. It doesn't really matter whether they're human or not just yet. Instead, you smile, ignoring the implication that you aren't completely trusted by the authorities.

"Don't worry about it. We're probably going to nap in a bit, anyway, and there's no real rush. Talk to whoever you need to about it." He gives you a relieved smile and nods. "Oh, and – um, what is your name?" Surprisingly, he just laughs it off.

"Oh, don't worry about that – a lot of humans have trouble telling us apart unless we dress differently. Anyone on-duty," he pats what is apparently the royal uniform, "is perfectly fine being referred to as 'Toad.' Enjoy your rest!" You smile again and bow, thankful for the clarification that the residents of the Mushrom Kingdom apparently don't consider themselves human. Does that make Toadstool an anomaly, or is she actually a human? Are humans and Toads fertile with each other?

"Alright, thank you, Toad. Have a good day." He smiles and waits until the door is almost closed before turning away, and you look back at Hatate after shutting it entirely. "Well, that's taken care of, at least. Anything you want to do, or are you just going to read your book?" She scowls at you, but with no response incoming you toss yourself onto your bed and take out your notebook. A few more notes here and there, and then you'll stay true to your word and take a short nap …

***

The library, like the main hall, has ceilings that are at least tolerably high, enough to just barely fit a third tier of bookshelves if they were so inclined. Two seems to be enough, however, and after he librarian Toad shows you how the library is set up he returns to his desk. You find a reasonably large circular table that's out of the way and start moving books to it: a few histories, biographies, almanacs, and maps. "... This doesn't make much sense," Hatate says after half an hour.

"Hm?" You don't look up from the maps; the styles are wildly different, and it's hard to tell what's merely a fanciful appearance and what's factually correct.

"Well, they have family information on Mario and Toadstool, but I was checking what they have for Bowser. You'd think they'd know something about their mortal enemy, after all." You nod, accepting that you're not going to get the maps to agree on things just yet. "Well, they don't have much. He's just 'Bowser, King of the Koopas,' long list of titles. And there's always been a King of the Koopas, at least so far as these are concerned." You look at the books she has sitting open in front of her; one is new, a few look like they're well-used, and one looks quite a bit older. You shrug.

"Okay. A few possibilities, plus combinations. What is it that concerns you the most?" Hatate sighs and claps her hands over her face.

"Aya, this guy might be a youkai, or something similar. And he keeps losing to this Mario guy – has for years. But … these people don't care. Bowser starts an incident, Mario beats Bowser, life goes on, repeat. But no one seems to learn anything, and Bowser is never permanently dealt with. It's like …." You smile and shake your head.

"The public records could be wrong, intentionally or not. There might be a metaphysical reason for it; certainly, an outsider to Gensokyo would probably be confused about our yearly Incidents, and a lot of youkai have apparently contradictory goals. You haven't even scratched past the surface yet. Tonight, if things still don't make sense, we'll think about trying something else." Hatate sighs and nods, and you dig into some of the more geographically inclined almanacs to help you sort through the maps.

***

You stretch as Hatate gets up from the table and flops onto her bed. Your understanding of the local region is still theoretical – you aren't sure if some magician is actually changing the land every generation or so, or if the continents of this world float across the water – but Hatate finally gave up a little after noon, and you have to agree that the information she was looking at just doesn't add up well. Unfortunately, the only one who could clear that up would be Bowser himself. Either he's at least your age, and probably losing to Mario intentionally, or the Koopas have excellent information security. Someone knocks softly at the door as you consider your options, then it quickly opens and Toadstool darts inside, peering back out before closing it quietly. "Good evening, Your Highness," you say, and you hear Hatate shift around on her bed. Toadstool nods and walks over to the table, slumping tiredly into Hatate's recently-vacated chair.

"Hello, Aya, Hatate. I heard you spent the day in the library." You nod, expression carefully neutral.

"Yes. Quite interesting reading in there." She nods back, not appearing to pay much attention.

"I've been … talking with the Chancellor for most of the day. He wants me to stay here, with extra guards, in case something else happens." You smile dryly.

"Have more guards ever stopped Bowser before?" She shakes her head.

"No, which is part of why I'm so frustrated. I want to help Mario, you see, but … well, I don't know where he is, so …." You watch her until she raises her head and looks you in the eyes. "I want you to kidnap me again." You blink. You had expected her to ask you to find him, maybe pass along a message, but … you look back at Hatate, who looks like she's even more astonished by the request than you are. "I know it sounds awful, and it – it doesn't have to be right now, but …." Her head sinks despondently and she stares at the table's carefully-polished surface. Hm. It wouldn't be the first time you 'kidnapped' someone this way, but since you don't know where Mario is, you would have to carry her around until you find him. That could be … frustrating.


What do you do?

[ ] Tell her no.
- [ ] Spend the next day at the library.
- [ ] Leave the kingdom tomorrow.
- - [ ] Go to Bowser's Castle.

[ ] Agree.
- [ ] Kidnap her right away.
- [ ] Kidnap her tomorrow, after spending the day at the library.
- [ ] After visiting Bowser's Castle.

[ ] Other?
 
Heh. I wonder if the act of "kidnapping" has some kind of special metaphysical value in this world - and if it does, what it means for us to perform a kidnapping upon request.

I.e. Did Princess Peach just propose to us? :V
 
Back
Top