[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
Dragon Harem Quest - Or: Saying You Were Gay Wasn't The Conversation-Ender You Hoped For
- Thread starter ZerbanDaGreat
- Start date
- Original
TenfoldShields
Lounging on a Hoard of Words
- Pronouns
- He/Him
This is honestly sort of my thoughts on it all and probably worded better than I would be able to lol. Honestly that bit where he came clean about the "destiny" stuff did a lot to really defuse the- or maybe not defuse but certainly blunt the hard edge of the unknown factor. When it seemed like there was some significant Plot Stakes involved in it all and that Issachar might be tasked as Eldingar's handler or low-key manipulating him into doing A Thing. It's way more natural to be wary of someone who's involved in a grand, overarching design than you can't really see because you don't know what's at risk, what'll be required of you, what they really want, who they're working for, etc etc. But if it's just..."I'm pretty introverted by nature but sometimes I worry I'm just lonely and in denial" that's a whole different animal.
Hah. It's kinda worth thinking about but like. There's something really cute in the idea that...
This seems like it was probably Issachar's first big social step in awhile. Y'know just dropping in on his neighbor who he kinda knows by sight and seems like he's having a rough time, he's even fucking it up a bit in that kind of way where he obviously had a few lines prepped as a way to get his foot in the door and then was just completely unprepared for Eldingar's Eldingar-ness. You can even kinda see in hindsight how he just made the "destiny" stuff up on the spot and it 100% worked and de-escalated the situation from "pissed off, paranoid dragon being dragony".
I guess it's part of why his true nature doesn't actually seem like a huge big lie to me really. He's been honest about the really relationship defining stuff, the stuff that majorly matters in terms of where he stands and what he wants/needs, and I think it's pretty likely that he'll open up about his background once we progress his social link a bit.
But as it is it's not something he's consciously hiding or seems super troubled by or ashamed of or whatever, it's just something he does. And Eldingar hasn't done much beyond get mildly irritated at it, and even that's mostly because Issachar teases him about it sometimes. Voting for Eldingar trying to be all flirty and stuff is, in that vein, sort of him showing that...dunno. He's happy to try to be romantically involved even if there's not necessarily a sexual element I think?
- Location
- The Land of Many Bregrets
- Pronouns
- They/Them
I guess it's part of why his true nature doesn't actually seem like a huge big lie to me really. He's been honest about the really relationship defining stuff, the stuff that majorly matters in terms of where he stands and what he wants/needs, and I think it's pretty likely that he'll open up about his background once we progress his social link a bit.
Exactly. I don't feel Issachar greatly cares too much if we find out his backstory; he's just ambiguous about it because... well, I suspect now that's just what he's used to doing (I assume his neighbours usually aren't/weren't dragons in the past however-long-he's-lived-'till-now). It's like a game; he spent the entire time in Lyrros' mansion pretty much blatantly dangling breadcrumbs and hints. He hides it, sure, but if he wanted us to not know he'd be a hell of a lot less blatant about it.
With the destiny stuff out of the way I'm a lot less concerned. Like his asexuality; if it needs to be brought up I'm pretty sure he'll bring it up.
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Madou Sutegobana
Autocorrupt has been disabled.
- Location
- Twin Realms Mandala
[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
Isn't a lack of a mating frenzy common? Wasn't Eldingar content to lay on his hoard for centuries?
Isn't a lack of a mating frenzy common? Wasn't Eldingar content to lay on his hoard for centuries?
Omegahugger
Inattentive Idiot
I have a question for those asking us to further question Issachar (and others who want to join in): What exactly are you expecting to hear?
Like, what exactly are we expecting him to plausably hide that's more important than him being asexual in a relationship with 3+ guythirsty beastieboys?
Heck, what could he even be hiding that would make him undateable in general?
His Religion? We know it doesn't have a problem with same-sex elationships, and I'm pretty sure Issy wouldn't be going through with this if his Deity forbade Dragon relationships.
His family/organisation/"friends"? A few updates ago, voters made the argument that Eldingar should be in charge of catering due to the very real possibility that our mom would otherwise make a virgin snack bar, so I don't think we are in any state to point fingers there.
His species? I literally can't think of anything that would be undateable, and I've seen a lot of weird creatures in my time on the internet.
Like, what exactly are we expecting him to plausably hide that's more important than him being asexual in a relationship with 3+ guythirsty beastieboys?
Heck, what could he even be hiding that would make him undateable in general?
His Religion? We know it doesn't have a problem with same-sex elationships, and I'm pretty sure Issy wouldn't be going through with this if his Deity forbade Dragon relationships.
His family/organisation/"friends"? A few updates ago, voters made the argument that Eldingar should be in charge of catering due to the very real possibility that our mom would otherwise make a virgin snack bar, so I don't think we are in any state to point fingers there.
His species? I literally can't think of anything that would be undateable, and I've seen a lot of weird creatures in my time on the internet.
- Location
- The Internet
[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
LupineVolt
Now with 200% more Puns
- Location
- Michigan
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
I'm a fickle fucker
I'm a fickle fucker
Origami Clock
Right twice a day
- Location
- Brighton, UK
Hmm, what would be better do people think, the furious dragon blushes or the flustered angel noises? Because Eldy might well set the house on fire with how bright red (purple?) he'll go. Or at least make Angelboy's hair stand on end.
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
keenscythe
No longer NEET
- Location
- WA, USA
[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
I don't like the kiss vote. To be more specific, I dont like the word 'spark'. It smells like Eldingar's looking for an exception, a I know you told me this, but are you reeeaaallllyyy sure? Like, I know it's trying to appeal to romance too, but the kiss then comes off... badly.
I don't like the kiss vote. To be more specific, I dont like the word 'spark'. It smells like Eldingar's looking for an exception, a I know you told me this, but are you reeeaaallllyyy sure? Like, I know it's trying to appeal to romance too, but the kiss then comes off... badly.
Mizu
Software Developer
- Location
- Victoria, Australia
[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
Quite rare to see an asexual person in fiction, or indeed media in general. Even rarer to see them not being a villain of some sort, oddly. 'Tis nice!
Quite rare to see an asexual person in fiction, or indeed media in general. Even rarer to see them not being a villain of some sort, oddly. 'Tis nice!
- Location
- Somewhere else
[X] Offer to let Issachar think over what he wants for as long as he'd like. He seems to do well with time to think, and you're in no rush to try and intrude or pressure him. And fuck if you know how to help untangle this.
TenfoldShields
Lounging on a Hoard of Words
- Pronouns
- He/Him
That feels like a bit of an unfair reading tbh, and something skeevier than would be expected of the character or the writer. Eldingar's not going to do it if it would make Issachar uncomfortable, Issachar's not going to say it doesn't make him uncomfortable if it would (and Eldingar would probably switch to an awkward but sincere hug or something), and I'm pretty sure that Zerban's not going to write about Eldingar trying to fix Issachar with his big blue dragon dong like it's a 90's RomCom and Issachar's a career woman who's never settled down and Eldingar's played by Hugh Grant.
For two awkward guys who are at least tentatively interested in each other, a display of physical affection to see if it elicits some emotion (and wow do the clinical terms just murder any romance
) isn't...that off I think? It's Eldingar trying to show that he likes Issachar and that he's not at all turned off by him being ace is my read of it. I mean it's probably going to be kinda cringey, sure, but that's only because the Romance part of his brain is atrophied as fuck and he's still fumbling around with a lot of stuff and exploring and this is something somewhat outside his normal experience. Point is he's probably going to fuck it up at least a little but not in a way that'd run largely counter to his established development where he tries his best to be sensitive and responsive to the needs of his boyfriends-and-other even if he's kinda bad at it.
Yeah, I have faith in Zerban as a writer and I trust that they'll do it well. It's just a little upsetting to think about, is all.
LupineVolt
Now with 200% more Puns
- Location
- Michigan
Still, remember the kiss vote mentions asking for permission beforehand. "May I..." and then so on, and see if that has any romantic feelings.
Asexuality is a spectrum, from the sexually repulsed, the sexually indifferent, and even those who only find a sexual attraction after establishing a romantic bond. Zerban knows this, in part because we've spoken about asexuality before. I myself identify as Ace. And for that, I trust that the permission to kiss will turn out fine. Even if it isn't a slam dunk, I don't expect it to be uncomfortable.
Asexuality is a spectrum, from the sexually repulsed, the sexually indifferent, and even those who only find a sexual attraction after establishing a romantic bond. Zerban knows this, in part because we've spoken about asexuality before. I myself identify as Ace. And for that, I trust that the permission to kiss will turn out fine. Even if it isn't a slam dunk, I don't expect it to be uncomfortable.
- Location
- United States
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
Vaalintine
Wild Wondorous Wolfalope
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Okay, Issachar is asexual. That still leaves a very important question that needs to be answered: how does Issachar feel about cuddling?
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
greatoz
Debonair Djinni
- Location
- The Other Place
Ayyyyyyyy an ace character! Kudos for the top-notch execution there.
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
Imrix
Periodically Malevolent QM
Hmm. Something to put a pin in: Will Issachar keep doing this the next time he has to leave? Probably not, given his thing about politeness, but it'll be interesting to see.
Also a point to consider; would Eldingar really know whether this looks like a proper mortal home, or is it just a convincing enough facsimile to pass muster with a NEET dragon?
That's kinda neat, actually. Issachar being Basically Eldingar, just in a more um, refined? Kind of fashion.
Oh, he's ace.
...
I know this is kind of a big twist, given the rarity of such characters, but mostly it just feels kind of... prosaic, to me. In a cute way, I guess, the defusing of some Big Secret into just, oh, he's ace.
[ ] Tell Issachar, as gently as you can, that you're not sure if it would work out with him romantically. The sexual side is definitely important, and if it became some constant pressure or chore for him that sounds awful for everyone involved.
Pfft, nah.
[ ] Offer to let Issachar think over what he wants for as long as he'd like. He seems to do well with time to think, and you're in no rush to try and intrude or pressure him. And fuck if you know how to help untangle this.
Mm, I'm with @Guessmyname, this seems like Issachar has had time to think, and this is what he's come up with.
[ ] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
>Eldingar
>Sauve and confident and charming
Pfft. Don't kid yourself. I mean, the failure would probably be adorable, but I dunno, veering from this to the romantic equivalent of pratfall comedy seems like too hard a swerve.
No, I think the two main possibilities are,
[ ] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
and,
[ ] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
The former seems like the best romance option, to me. It directly addresses and defuses his issue, reassuring him that this can work.
Thing is though, as much as I'm in favour of reassuring Issachar like this, and as much as I feel like now isn't the best time, I was just talking with Tenfold all of like, yesterday that I agree with the the need to find out what's really going on with Issachar, I just didn't want to do so because eavesdropping is an underhanded dick move. Well, the update has just offered me a polite, straightforward way to press Issachar for more information, and unlike Tenfold I'm not greatly reassured by Issachar's explanation so far because, frankly, I don't know that I can trust it. Like, to take Tenfold's own words from a couple pages back,
Ducked or dodged. Issachar has a demonstrated habit of doing that, and to be honest, this reads like another of those. It's prosaic, like I was saying. A bit too pat. Not a lie, I think - him being ace fits the facts, fits his character, fits the story. But I do think this may be a deflection, an offering up of a 'harmless' secret in lieu of his true nature. And... Again, I was just talking to Tenfold about the desire to press Issachar for information on his true nature, so I'm not satisfied with that deflection.
[X] Tell Issachar, politely yet frankly, that his lack of sex drive really isn't the most pressing issue. He's still hiding things, between his ambiguous mortality and his mysterious past and mysterious associates and mysterious powers. Ask him to please just explain, once and for all.
Nidhoggr
Suletta Permetta
- Pronouns
- He/Him
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
TenfoldShields
Lounging on a Hoard of Words
- Pronouns
- He/Him
That feels a bit unfair, I mean I can see Eldingar fucking it up a bit but being earnest and sincere and openly affectionate counts for a lot in terms of what makes something like that sink or swim. So judging it on the basis of "well the blue dumbass probably can't do anything right" is a bit weird, like, it's basically assuming that Zerban's going to make it a pure joke at Eldingar's expense. Which would be kinda meanspirited rather than mostly comedic.
I don't think it's a "harmless secret", at least in the sense of, like, it visibly matters to the dude and it's something he was very much low-key concerned about. And him opening up about his own loneliness and how he's unsure how comfortable he is in his private, homebodyish life was an unprompted vulnerability that, frankly, matters way more than what kind of Celestial creature he is out of the DM's Manual. And then, like I said more recently, the stuff about the destiny really changes the nature of the dynamic by excising a lot of the presumed stakes and re-contextualizing a lot of previous interactions. Issachar just being there because he wants to be there is very different from "Issachar is on a mission from God" complete with sunglasses and a suit.
Knowing the details of his true nature is interesting but I don't really see the whole relationship turning on it, and passing up the opportunity for Eldingar to reciprocate someone honestly confiding in him with, like, unprompted attention and care feels like a missed opportunity.
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- Pronouns
- He/Him
[X] Tell Issachar it's kind of dumb that he thought this would ruin the chances of things working between you. One of the many benefits of polyamory is that he wouldn't need to feel that pressure for sex. There'd be enough willing partners to go around, leaving him free to focus on the romantic side.
Either this or the romance option seems fine by me. I don't have a problem with Issachar keeping secrets. I don't expect the love interests to go and tell all their darkest fears and issues, we're not playing a BioWare game here.
Either this or the romance option seems fine by me. I don't have a problem with Issachar keeping secrets. I don't expect the love interests to go and tell all their darkest fears and issues, we're not playing a BioWare game here.
- Location
- Ohio
Is it like a kiss on the cheek or a more direct one? I have family that may or may not be asexual, and they can't stand any type of lip kissing. But I know everyone is different.
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
Maybe if he says no, Issachar might suggest a hug instead?
[X] Suggest a romantic gesture, something to see if there's a spark without crossing his boundaries. Saunter up to him, say something very suave and confident and charming, then give him a kiss. Kisses should be safe for him, right? Probably. You'll ask to be safe.
Maybe if he says no, Issachar might suggest a hug instead?
Omegahugger
Inattentive Idiot
Plus, just making the attempt at being romantic shows that Eldingar accepts this new development and is willing to give it a go. Sure, it'll be about as smooth as a staircase, but Issachar knows Eldin by now and would know that the attempt is genuine.
See, the good thing about dealing with people in person is that that you can ask them about their boundaries. If Issachar doesn't want kisses, he'll just say so. Eldingar isn't such a force of charismatic personality he can make people do what they don't want to.
Though I hope we end up hugging Issachar no matter what, I somehow feels like he needs it.