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Dragon Harem Quest - Or: Saying You Were Gay Wasn't The Conversation-Ender You Hoped For

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[X] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.
 
[X] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.

This is a set-up; the new secretary is obviously in the pocket of the lady who is trying to vamp Eldingar. How else would she be in position to try and bully him right as he's left the office?

We have a wizard who loves thinking with portals, the literal man of everyone's dreams, an ifrit who lives to screw with people, a lightning farmer and Jun-ho. If we can't manage something inside a week with all that, we don't deserve our fortune.
 
Steven Kodaly said:
We have a wizard who loves thinking with portals, the literal man of everyone's dreams, an ifrit who lives to screw with people, a lightning farmer and Jun-ho. If we can't manage something inside a week with all that, we don't deserve our fortune.
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Counterpoint, making money in any organized and efficient fashion takes time if you're not pulling off something like this. And this not only helps us, but it knocks a rival down a peg.
 
[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.

We are absolutely being played right now. I have no idea if she thinks the seduction will work on Eldingar, but even if she's aware that it wouldn't it's still seriously thrown him off his game, especially on top of the whole "you have no money" thing. So, he's not thinking straight clearly, and suddenly someone's offering an easy way out.

She may be planning to throw Eldingar and his house to the wolves, to hide her trail, since there's a fairly obvious causal relationship between House Eldin going from bankrupt to staying afloat and the Russos having their vault broken into. It's also a position that gives her potential for blackmail later on.

It's very curious that she seems to be aware that Eldingar is a dragon - though I do have this vague idea that she doesn't actually know that, just knows that this random nobleman who appeared out of nowhere with lots of money is kinda suspish and probably has something useful for a heist.

Now, I hear you ask, why, having established all this, did I vote to agree?

Allow me to lay out my reasoning.

  1. I am contractually obligated to vote for heists.
  2. Even if she is aware that we are a dragon, she is more than likely unaware of our boyfriends resources, which include a Djinn (panic button), an Incubus (can probably do the face thing, even without seduction), a nbae wizard-apprentice (tech support), another dragon (nobody ever expects a dragon to have another dragon as backup) and whatever the fuck Issachar is (probably disappointed that we're going to turn to a life of crime).
  3. Corollary to 2: Being involved in a criminal enterprise together is a good first step to building a serious and long-lasting relationship with potential romantic partners.
  4. I really want to see Zerban write a heist.
  5. She may be planning to try this with or without us - if the latter, then if she fails we're still in the red and she may even try and implicate us in an act of spite or self-interest, and if she succeeds then no profit for us, and she still may implicate us. If we cooperate, we're getting involved, granting a measure of control over the situation, and letting us profit.
  6. Fuck the Russos, for absolutely no discernible reason.
  7. I wanna do a heist.
 
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LupineVolt said:
Counterpoint, making money in any organized and efficient fashion takes time if you're not pulling off something like this. And this not only helps us, but it knocks a rival down a peg.
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Who said anything about legitimate business ventures? We're going to plan our own heist, with blackjack and hookers boy toys!

Or just go adventuring in the Beyond for a shot of cash, that might work. It would buy enough time for Eldingar to get a handle on his financial situation, along with figuring out just who this lady is before trusting any other interesting offers.
 
[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.

I am not entirely convinced this isn't a shapeshifter who just assumed a female form would work on Eldin, whose true form may or may not end up on our map.
 
[X] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.

We don't need no help/poisoned gifts, lady. The boys are more than enough for making any possible fortunes.
 
[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.

Absolutely do the thing. This means either more plot or more money, so it's fine.
 
[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind
 
[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.

I think the laws of comedy demand that we cave to this demand. After all, we are deeply flustered by having this woman in our personal space, and didn't we *just* sign a bunch of paperwork without reading it in detail because we got flustered?
 
[X] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.

I know a plot hook when I see one. In the finest tradition of RPG protagonists, let's ignore it.
ZerbanDaGreat said:
If you could only catch them all... but that sounds like a lot of work, and you like the very tall tip of your lair.
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ZerbanDaGreat said:
You pass a few lightning farms on the way in, great obelisks of silver and copper that call down the lion's share of the storm's fury, trapping the snarling bolts in specially-prepared casks for shipment up to the city.
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ZerbanDaGreat said:
I run and live on one of the smaller independent lightning farms near here
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Here's a plan: get into lightning farming, with Issachar's help. We can breathe the stuff, after all.
 
ZerbanDaGreat said:
Like they understand spending money to make money on a level that other mortals can only dream at. You of course understand it on no levels because you have the fiscal sense of a haddock and your biggest personal acquisitions are made via the bargaining position of possessing very sharp teeth and claws and the ability to breathe lightning.
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shshshshs

you're doing the capitalism thing fine eldingar, you've basically got the gist of being a big wallstreet moneyman down sans, like, the subprime mortgages and cocaine

ZerbanDaGreat said:
"Look," she says, striding across that last little gap between you. You shrink against the wall unconsciously but she gets right up in your personal space all the same, practically pressing against you. You're close enough to smell her perfume, close enough to hear her breathing. She tilts her wrist and taps the scroll against your chin this time. "Let's not do this dance of transparent lies any longer than we have to. We both know that you're a man of certain... shall we say exotic talents. And I'm a woman with more than a few talents of her own. I'd say there's quite a lot we can do for each other~"
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God. I think. I think a. she obviously doesn't know he's gay and b. she doesn't know he's a dragon because dragons are big enough deals in setting that you don't fuck with them unless you're on the same power lllleeeevvveeellllll

she's a fox spirit

calling it now she's a they and they are a kitsune and eldingar is just kinda not-well-traveled/awkwardly lowkey racist enough that he can't tell the difference between parts of !Asia and !Japan vs !Korea. god if they are a fox spirit i think they're still probably a dumbass because they have completely the wrong read off of every part of eldingar from sexuality to basic competency so this is gonna be a treat

[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.
 
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TenfoldShields said:
she's a fox spirit

calling it now she's a they and they are a kitsune and eldingar is just kinda not-well-traveled/awkwardly lowkey racist enough that he can't tell the difference between parts of !Asia and !Japan vs !Korea. god if they are a fox spirit i think they're still probably a dumbass because they have completely the wrong read off of every part of eldingar from sexuality to basic competency so this is gonna be a treat
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^
Basically my read as well.
 
Well, looks like we get to enjoy business quest now!

... What precisely is our business supposed to be doing, anyway? Do we even know?
 
Omegahugger said:
^
Basically my read as well.
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Hrm, looking it over I think...

ZerbanDaGreat said:
[ ] Söfnun. It was there when you last checked too so it's probably not just some seasonal trinket at the market, nor is it something you'll have to steal from Mother. Of course if it's in a merchant prince's vault, stealing may still be involved. You'll have to use a mortal guise too. This one may call for a little more finesse.
[ ] The forest estate. Buried deep within the ancient boughs, forgotten by some, feared as haunted by others. You're not afraid of eating some skeletons if it means getting ancient aristocracy treasure.
[ ] The wizard's tower. Accessible by obscure trails or perhaps not at all without teleportation or flight, warded against intrusion and perhaps even teeming with magebred guardbeasts. Definitely packed to the brim with magic baubles and curios.
[ ] The island. A bit of a flight and a bit of a damp outing, but you can't go wrong with ancient ruins raised up from the depths of the sea just waiting to be plundered.
[ ] The travelling treasure. You haven't been watching long enough to tell if it's actually following the road or randomly through the wilderness, but it doesn't much matter with this magic map and compass. Plenty of open space means you get to use your true form, too!
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Assuming the LI at Söfnun is Mysterious Big Boob Purple Lady (i am 100% right and they are 100% going to feel silly as fuck) and we met Abzu at the Wizard's Tower...

That leaves the ancient haunted mansion that's probably host to a vampire or something (we're missing the broody bad boy option). The island that's almost undoubtedly home to some kind of lonely eldritch sea monster (swolethulu or something). And the travelling treasure which is a big ??? and we flat out do not know enough about to guess save that it's, uh, moving. Oh and the Plutocracy one who may or may not be lady Mexican Raiden.

So a pretty neat spread with only two really big unknowns shut up I'm definitely not wrong I am The Perfect.
 
[] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.

If we crash and burn we do it on our own terms and y'know

Fantasy Catwoman's

Actually you know what

[X] Take the woman's offer. Get your own back and rob those Rosso bastards blind.

Fuck the Rossos
 
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Hmmm. Standard merchant practice of this era is just... You go buy foreign exotic goods in some distant place where they're cheap, and then come back and sell them where they're expensive, right?

So, what we need to corner the market- after we deal with these Rosso fuckboys- is to either upset that paradigm (INDUSTRIALIZATION HO!) or work in that paradigm, but better than everyone else.

... It strikes me that we have a very foreign dragon living in our house who would be helpful in understanding his native culture and conducting business over there. And also that we have an Enby wizard boyfriend who could probably, like, help us make magic ships that go faster, if not just set up permanent gates between countries that we control and use to remove shipping time entirely.

I mean, assuming that nobody else has done that before, anyway. Do wizards go into business often?
 
[X] Reject the woman's offer. You'll come up with your own plan to save the House and your dwindling coffers with a lower chance of backfiring - hopefully.

 
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