- Pronouns
- It/She
Here at the end, what an amazing ride! The eggshell cracked, but still perfectly capable of deflecting tank rounds. Thank you for writing!
-
For all readers and writers
After much ado, our new tagging system is here and being rolled out to the userbase. Read more here!
A Little Vice (Trans Magical Girl fic)
- Thread starter Shadell
- Start date
- Original Users' Choice!
Voted best in category in the Users' Choice awards.
- Location
- Shibuya, UG
Wow! I'm so happy that I helped inspire other people to make MTG card versions for this awesome story. I particularly like how you riffed off one of my ideas that I came up with super late in the process - Monster role tokens! I really like your design idea of playing into the monster of the week vibes. Now I'm curious what a "saint" role token would look like... doesn't really make flavor sense though so meh.
Since this is supposed to be about fun and flavor (and others are waaay more qualified that me to comment on practicality of desgin), I thought I'd offer some commentary on the flavor of the cards! Overall, awesome job!
I love the three versions of Chiro!
-For Charlie's card, I wonder if it would be funny to make Charlie block any non-Human that attacks instead of exiling? That way Charlie always ends up being the first card attacked lol.
- For Chiro's card, I love the flavor of transforming back and forth, as well as the token created when transformed. I'm not sure if the lifegain ability makes a ton of sense on her front though... If it were me, I might make the lifegain ability also include green, cause I feel that its criminal to have a Chiro card not involve green mana.
-Same comment for Humanitas and Invidia Bat, I love the idea of somehow getting green mana into costs. Maybe drawing off of a Sigarda card? Something like Sigarda, Host of Herons?
-For Charlie's card, I wonder if it would be funny to make Charlie block any non-Human that attacks instead of exiling? That way Charlie always ends up being the first card attacked lol.
- For Chiro's card, I love the flavor of transforming back and forth, as well as the token created when transformed. I'm not sure if the lifegain ability makes a ton of sense on her front though... If it were me, I might make the lifegain ability also include green, cause I feel that its criminal to have a Chiro card not involve green mana.
-Same comment for Humanitas and Invidia Bat, I love the idea of somehow getting green mana into costs. Maybe drawing off of a Sigarda card? Something like Sigarda, Host of Herons?
Love the quotes from Michael!
- For Castitas, I love the idea of linking her card to Castitas! Flare! Barrage! Maybe she deals 3 instances of 1 damage on her activated ability to mimic the instant? Alternatively, you can add flavor text to her card and make her activated ability have the name of one of Castitas' other moves, such as Castitas Empyreal Arrow.
- For Temperance, I love the idea of incorporating food into her design! It's a much more clean idea than my concept.
- For Castitas, I love the idea of linking her card to Castitas! Flare! Barrage! Maybe she deals 3 instances of 1 damage on her activated ability to mimic the instant? Alternatively, you can add flavor text to her card and make her activated ability have the name of one of Castitas' other moves, such as Castitas Empyreal Arrow.
- For Temperance, I love the idea of incorporating food into her design! It's a much more clean idea than my concept.
-Avaritia Wolf: I know you did it for balance reasons, but it might be cool to either have Avaritia Wolf have vigilance, or for Avaritia Wolf to not tap when making Monster roles. One thing I noticed in ALV is that Avaritia tends to fight alongside eir monster of the week. Thus its kinda weird that making a monster taps Avaritia, meaning ey can't fight along side them.
Generally, I really love these cards. I didn't really have any good ideas for making other cards to flavor the world of ALV, so I'm glad you took a shot at making them!
-For Embrace Virtue, it probably makes more sense of Saints to get Flying rather than Vigilance. But I love the flavor of by Embracing Virtue and Indulging in Sin, the Saints and Abyssal Beasts can get extra abilities!
-For Fidget Spinner, since Superbia only has protection from Abyssal creatures and creatures with Monster roles, he would be unaffected by this Resinner. Which might not be a bad thing, considering how annoying Fidget Spinner is. Speaking of which, you might want to consider an effect such as Mogor the Ogre from Hearthstone for even more annoyingness!
-For Embrace Virtue, it probably makes more sense of Saints to get Flying rather than Vigilance. But I love the flavor of by Embracing Virtue and Indulging in Sin, the Saints and Abyssal Beasts can get extra abilities!
-For Fidget Spinner, since Superbia only has protection from Abyssal creatures and creatures with Monster roles, he would be unaffected by this Resinner. Which might not be a bad thing, considering how annoying Fidget Spinner is. Speaking of which, you might want to consider an effect such as Mogor the Ogre from Hearthstone for even more annoyingness!
- Location
- Shibuya, UG
If its okay to point out small typos we found while reading, I know I found a couple during my last read through.
In chapter 11, I found this phrasing a little confusing. Lupin walks, then leans against a pillar immediately? It might be more clear to just say "Lupin gestured for me, and learned against a pillar,"
Also in chapter 11, Avaritia mistakenly refers to Superbia as eir father rather than uncle.
In chapter 17, I believe you meant to say "forceful enough to make Ida fall back".
In chapter 17, there's a random Superbia with a period in the middle of a sentence.
Bluespark9
Goddess of Magic and Passion
- Location
- SoCal
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Chiro should use it as Armor, don't want to waste such a powerful asset after all.
I still cant believe this was the last chapter, honestly. I
Abby Normal
High Clerk of the Ymaryn
- Pronouns
- He/Him
After like two weeks of finishing up other stuff i was in the middle of rereading THOUSANDS OF YEARS i have finished my reread (and first read of the latest chapter of course 
)
AHHH ITS SO GOOD! Also potentially will be the kick in the pants i need to finally go back to rewatch* Cardcaptor Sakura... I got super into that in like...elementary school? middle school? and i still get a little kick out of anytime i see a magic wand in a show that looks like hers
At some point (probably whenever i do my NEXT reread**
) i'll have to give more detailed feedback, but for now i'll just say that it was very good! I absolutely loved the framing device of the episode previews and general "we're watching stuff that was off-screen in the show, and starting 12 episodes in" elements! Chiro's emotional journey is very powerful and i think manages to thread the line in going deep into rough emotions and the like without being too depressing to read or have catharsis at the end...even if Chiro should not be allowed to get away with being so oblivious please girl D=
*Well. Its only a 're'watch instead of just watching for the first proper time if you ignore that i probably only caught like half the episodes, that i think i was watching one of the versions that aired out of order or had weird cuts and changes, and that i intend to watch the sub this time around...
**Or maybe just after my best friend finishes reading? i finally convinced them to start reading, though they haven't gotten far, just to C's rescue from the forest early on
The GIF version still worked when i saw it but it looks like its also a discord link and so will eventually go away, just as a headsup
)AHHH ITS SO GOOD! Also potentially will be the kick in the pants i need to finally go back to rewatch* Cardcaptor Sakura... I got super into that in like...elementary school? middle school? and i still get a little kick out of anytime i see a magic wand in a show that looks like hers
At some point (probably whenever i do my NEXT reread**
) i'll have to give more detailed feedback, but for now i'll just say that it was very good! I absolutely loved the framing device of the episode previews and general "we're watching stuff that was off-screen in the show, and starting 12 episodes in" elements! Chiro's emotional journey is very powerful and i think manages to thread the line in going deep into rough emotions and the like without being too depressing to read or have catharsis at the end...even if Chiro should not be allowed to get away with being so oblivious please girl D=*Well. Its only a 're'watch instead of just watching for the first proper time if you ignore that i probably only caught like half the episodes, that i think i was watching one of the versions that aired out of order or had weird cuts and changes, and that i intend to watch the sub this time around...
**Or maybe just after my best friend finishes reading? i finally convinced them to start reading, though they haven't gotten far, just to C's rescue from the forest early on
Did amazon ever stop counting ebook preorders in a way that they're worse for the author than ordering day-of-release? I've been waiting until release day for ebooks since...i think it was the first or maybe second beware of chicken ebook where i first learned about that?
It looks like using a discord link ate this fanart, btw"And yes, dear viewers, with the Angelic Saints defeated, it seems that Superbia's victory is- oh, but what is that? It's Humanitas, HUMANITAS COMING IN WITH THE LYYYYYYYYYYRE!"
The GIF version still worked when i saw it but it looks like its also a discord link and so will eventually go away, just as a headsup
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- Location
- Attached to a wall
- Pronouns
- She/Her
What regions would an eventual print on demand deliver to?
Amazon is a bit of a maze for me in acquiring any information.
Envy’s Candor (Invidia themed opening song)
I keep thinking about the Op and Ed of Shining Virtue Angelic Heart.
And the fact that Chiro and Inessa are Sisters. So maybe the Op would be sung by Chiro's VA about Inessa and be a cheery and boppy bit about how much she envies Inessa and how much it hurts being on the sidelines. Hm . The visuals would be from her perspective So they'd start out Bright but gradually darken until all that's when the Op Ends..... Actually let's write this out.
My hero, you're always here to save the day. I'm blinded by your radiance in almost every way.
Castitas stands in front of C with her bow drawn. She lets lose on a Re-Sinner and turns around to reach out a hand to C.
My Hero here to save the day How oh how can you show bright. You hurt my eyes with all your light.
Castitas is shown making a speech to Avaritia Wolf who laughs and leaps at her. Meanwhile a bat flits across the screen
Oh You Hero who shines so bright. I want it I want it I want it. I want your Shining Light!
The scene shows the bat landing on the window rafter looking in on C and Inessa talking. Inessa turns away for a moment and C looks directly at the bat.
If only you knew, what was true. After all I... can't be saved with Virtue.
A glowing green seed is shown as a manicured hand is shown wrapping around it
What a shame. You don't know my pain. I'll take the blame. All will be clear after the rain
We see Inessa in a torrent of rain desperately reaching out her hand. Lightning flashes and we see she's reaching out to Invidia Bat.
You'll see. You'll see. I'll take flight and be free.
We see Invidia flying into Avaritia who spins her upon her landing, and dips her. Ey pulls her upright and releases her. Invidia laughs as she twirls herself off the screen.
You Shining Light is Oh so bright.
Inessa is standing back to back with a black silhouette that has green apple earrings and a pulsing green seed in it's chest.
Oh we'll have to fight. I'll surpass your Light. This where it begins. Salvation wrought through Sin.
The silhouette bursts into Invidia Bat at the same time Inessa becomes Castitas. Invidia and Inessa leap in opposite directions and away from each other at the same time. Inessa lands with the Angelic saints and turns around to see Invidia being caught by Avaritia and set down so she can turn around and look at the gathering of saints.
Do you see? Oh look what I became! Once Vice soothed my pain. Can't you see? This is the True Me. I am the Beast of Envy.
There's a split screen between Castitas's sad face and Invidia's smile.
The screen fades to black.
Ooh! That worked out quite nicely for the Invidia Op! Hmm.... Title Title. I know! I'll call this "Envy's Candor."
And the fact that Chiro and Inessa are Sisters. So maybe the Op would be sung by Chiro's VA about Inessa and be a cheery and boppy bit about how much she envies Inessa and how much it hurts being on the sidelines. Hm . The visuals would be from her perspective So they'd start out Bright but gradually darken until all that's when the Op Ends..... Actually let's write this out.
My hero, you're always here to save the day. I'm blinded by your radiance in almost every way.
Castitas stands in front of C with her bow drawn. She lets lose on a Re-Sinner and turns around to reach out a hand to C.
My Hero here to save the day How oh how can you show bright. You hurt my eyes with all your light.
Castitas is shown making a speech to Avaritia Wolf who laughs and leaps at her. Meanwhile a bat flits across the screen
Oh You Hero who shines so bright. I want it I want it I want it. I want your Shining Light!
The scene shows the bat landing on the window rafter looking in on C and Inessa talking. Inessa turns away for a moment and C looks directly at the bat.
If only you knew, what was true. After all I... can't be saved with Virtue.
A glowing green seed is shown as a manicured hand is shown wrapping around it
What a shame. You don't know my pain. I'll take the blame. All will be clear after the rain
We see Inessa in a torrent of rain desperately reaching out her hand. Lightning flashes and we see she's reaching out to Invidia Bat.
You'll see. You'll see. I'll take flight and be free.
We see Invidia flying into Avaritia who spins her upon her landing, and dips her. Ey pulls her upright and releases her. Invidia laughs as she twirls herself off the screen.
You Shining Light is Oh so bright.
Inessa is standing back to back with a black silhouette that has green apple earrings and a pulsing green seed in it's chest.
Oh we'll have to fight. I'll surpass your Light. This where it begins. Salvation wrought through Sin.
The silhouette bursts into Invidia Bat at the same time Inessa becomes Castitas. Invidia and Inessa leap in opposite directions and away from each other at the same time. Inessa lands with the Angelic saints and turns around to see Invidia being caught by Avaritia and set down so she can turn around and look at the gathering of saints.
Do you see? Oh look what I became! Once Vice soothed my pain. Can't you see? This is the True Me. I am the Beast of Envy.
There's a split screen between Castitas's sad face and Invidia's smile.
The screen fades to black.
Ooh! That worked out quite nicely for the Invidia Op! Hmm.... Title Title. I know! I'll call this "Envy's Candor."
BethofDeath
Girls just wanna have pun
- Location
- Sector ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha
- Pronouns
- She/Her
ALL MY YES.
5/7 (a perfect score!), no notes.
Just needs an EP about the bitterness of envy and not being allowed to reach into the mirror it shows to pull it into reality, to pair it with.
5/7 (a perfect score!), no notes.
Just needs an EP about the bitterness of envy and not being allowed to reach into the mirror it shows to pull it into reality, to pair it with.
Actually I was thinking about having that be part of the insert song when Invidia and Castitas have their final battle with each other. The ED is going to be something different though.
- Location
- The Hall of Completed Quest Fame
- Pronouns
- She/Her
After searching, I'm surprised I could find only a single mention of Worm on here (by GreatWyrmGold natch) despite this being a major SV thread. Though now I guess I've gone and jinxed it, huh?
- Location
- Somewhere in the Ashes
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Worm is (slowly) losing its chokehold on both SB and SV. I realize it may not look like it, but it is. Part of that's because of how Ward wasn't well received, but mostly? Worm is just... old. It's over a decade old at this point. People are moving on.
- Location
- Somewhere!
- Pronouns
- She/Her
I don't think there's really an easy comparison either. The seeds and shards could line up a little but not so much virtue branches at all?
- Location
- Charlotte, NC
- Pronouns
- He/She/They
I like this a lot! I imagine that in the *real* Angelic Heart Shining Virtue they would have a more typical OP for season 1 and the 1st part of Season 2 only for this song to start playing during the "C becomes Invida Bat fully for the 1st time" sceen and then replacing the normal OP until the season finale (when she gets her Saint Humanitas character song), kinda of similar to the bait-and-switch OP for Magia.
- Location
- Earth
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Ah. So that's my reputation.
Thanks! And that's exactly it.(I forgot to post that this was the OP For the Invidia Arc) I imagine The Invidia Arc has it's own soundtrack. OP, ED, Insert Songs and there's absolutely one song that Lupin and Chiro sing where ey gush over how cute and Precious Chiro is and Chiro's part in that song is absolutely her flirting with Lupin and flustering em. Like it starts out with Lupin in control but by the end of the song Chiro has the reigns.
- Location
- The Hall of Completed Quest Fame
- Pronouns
- She/Her
On Worm being over a decade old, guess it's entering into the 'too old to be current, not old enough to be nostalgic' zone.
More referring to that you happen to have Worm but with a y in your username
More referring to that you happen to have Worm but with a y in your username
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- Location
- Earth
- Pronouns
- He/Him
"Wyrm" is a whole separate word! With—
(googles etymology)
(learns that the word "worm" is derived from the Old English word "wyrm")
You know what, never mind.
(googles etymology)
(learns that the word "worm" is derived from the Old English word "wyrm")
You know what, never mind.
Iris-Iven-Ibis
Interested-Idiot-Immortal
- Location
- You know
Take that you, wyrm!
Icipall
Don't worry, we can fanfix that!
- Location
- Cold snow fields of Finland
Gues it is true what they say. You're your own worst enemy.
Grey Rook
Genuine Nerd
- Location
- The Quantum Foam
Don't you mean wormst enemy?
Chastity's Helpless Lament! (Invidia arc ending theme)
I've got it! I've got the Invidia Arc ED! Let's hit it! Presenting: Chastity's Helpless Lament! Sung by Inessa's VA.
You were always there for me. Surpassing friendship, we're family
Child Inessa and a silhouette of the same size stand back to back.
We've been through trouble of all sort. I wouldn't be who I am without your support.
We see a nervous pre-teeen Inessa being pushed towards her parents by that same silhouette that's the same size as her. She nervously holds up a lily to her parents who accept it and smile at her. Inessa looks back to smile at the silhouette and gasps when she notices thorned vines around the silhouette's wrists.
With all that we've been through. All the times you knew what to do: I wish I could be as kind as you.
We see the Inessa asking the silhouette for advice. The camera pans over and Ida is asking the silhouette for advice. The camera pans over again and we see Temperance asking for advice the camera pans over once again and the silhouette is walking away from a sad Inessa with a slumped posture. The thorned vines have wrapped Around the Silhouette's arms and legs.
I see your pain (I want to be there for you too.) I see it's strain.(What are you going through?) What's hurting you?(What can I do?)
We see Inessa looking on helplessly through a clear wall with her hands pressed against it as the silhouette has it's entire body wrapped wrapped with thorned vines and is bleeding green on the other side. Inessa frantically beats against the wall to no avail. Suddenly a glowing green apple is flies at the wall from off screen and it shatters leaving only a door that's green on the left side and red on the right. The door opens and Inessa runs through.
How can I help you? Oh how can I get through? When you so ardently refuse the aid of my Shining Virtue.
Castitas sees the silhouette laying on the floor and reaches out a hand to help only for a well manicured hand with green nail polish to slap it away. In the silhouette's place is Invidia Bat.
Are you happier embracing Sin? Was that what you needed in the end? Can I finally see you actually smile again?
Invidia takes flight and gives Castitas a fangy smile as rain starts pouring around them.
You became more free when you embodied Envy? You take flight, do we have to fight? Is that true? Must this be the only way to get through?
Inessa forlornly raises her bow and Invidia does the same.
If it's true, I'll do what I have to. I'll get through. I dearly miss you.
Why was that more difficult than the OP? But that was fun! Note that this opening is played with a Lyre Harp, Piano, and Viola. This hints at how the Invidia Arc ends. The Humanitas ending is special.
You were always there for me. Surpassing friendship, we're family
Child Inessa and a silhouette of the same size stand back to back.
We've been through trouble of all sort. I wouldn't be who I am without your support.
We see a nervous pre-teeen Inessa being pushed towards her parents by that same silhouette that's the same size as her. She nervously holds up a lily to her parents who accept it and smile at her. Inessa looks back to smile at the silhouette and gasps when she notices thorned vines around the silhouette's wrists.
With all that we've been through. All the times you knew what to do: I wish I could be as kind as you.
We see the Inessa asking the silhouette for advice. The camera pans over and Ida is asking the silhouette for advice. The camera pans over again and we see Temperance asking for advice the camera pans over once again and the silhouette is walking away from a sad Inessa with a slumped posture. The thorned vines have wrapped Around the Silhouette's arms and legs.
I see your pain (I want to be there for you too.) I see it's strain.(What are you going through?) What's hurting you?(What can I do?)
We see Inessa looking on helplessly through a clear wall with her hands pressed against it as the silhouette has it's entire body wrapped wrapped with thorned vines and is bleeding green on the other side. Inessa frantically beats against the wall to no avail. Suddenly a glowing green apple is flies at the wall from off screen and it shatters leaving only a door that's green on the left side and red on the right. The door opens and Inessa runs through.
How can I help you? Oh how can I get through? When you so ardently refuse the aid of my Shining Virtue.
Castitas sees the silhouette laying on the floor and reaches out a hand to help only for a well manicured hand with green nail polish to slap it away. In the silhouette's place is Invidia Bat.
Are you happier embracing Sin? Was that what you needed in the end? Can I finally see you actually smile again?
Invidia takes flight and gives Castitas a fangy smile as rain starts pouring around them.
You became more free when you embodied Envy? You take flight, do we have to fight? Is that true? Must this be the only way to get through?
Inessa forlornly raises her bow and Invidia does the same.
If it's true, I'll do what I have to. I'll get through. I dearly miss you.
Why was that more difficult than the OP? But that was fun! Note that this opening is played with a Lyre Harp, Piano, and Viola. This hints at how the Invidia Arc ends. The Humanitas ending is special.
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Bluespark9
Goddess of Magic and Passion
- Location
- SoCal
- Pronouns
- She/Her
I don't know what worm is and at this point I'm too afraid to ask, I know it's about superheroes and stuff, but it's honestly just annoying removing it from the search bar when I'm looking for other stories.Don't you mean wormst enemy?
- Location
- Earth
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Are you "interested but afraid," or "annoyed and afraid"? Because if it's the former, I can give you a summary in a PM or something. I wouldn't want to do that if it was the latter, though.
Bluespark9
Goddess of Magic and Passion
- Location
- SoCal
- Pronouns
- She/Her
More annoyed honestly, and I was exaggerating for the sake of the joke when I said I was afraid, It's more that I don't care about this specific superhero comic and I looked at it a while ago, and it didn't seem that interesting to me.