I, Trailblazer (Honkai: Star Rail/Disco Elysium)

>Hell yeah, sleepover!
>Spend time with Himeko
>Spend time with Nameless
>Rest, and let your wounds heal up.

<Perception[Trivial:Success] Trivial: 6 vs Your Total: 9>Small bright dots become streams of pure light, almost burning into your eyes.

<Conceptualization[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> As though a child drew a picture by dragging their pen from one side, to the other. Beauty in simplicity.

<Interfacing[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> The floor below you is gently oscillating, as all trains should.

<Logic[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> Should this train be doing so? The Aeon of Trailblaze surely could have made it perfectly smooth.

<Shivers[Medium: Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 11> The Express is silent to your mental inquiry, its voice taken so long ago.

"Watching the stars, Stelle?" A voice jolts you out of your thoughts. "It's quite the enchanting sight… I always seem to catch my attention drifting to them as well."

"Ah, Himeko…" Either she is very stealthy, or you were a bit too lost in your own mind. You turn away from the cabin window and look at your… boss, you suppose? For a second though, your mind stalls. You haven't really had a chance to speak one on one with Himeko for more than a few sentences, and even when you did you were always focused on something else. Thus, it feels like the first time you're really seeing her, and, well…

<Electrochemistry[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 11> Daaaaaaaamn.

Yes. 'Damn'.

<Empathy[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A small smirk has appeared on her face… she's noticed you staring.

<Encyclopedia[Trivial:Success] Trivial: 6 vs Your Total: 8> Something similar happened last time too, except her and March's original misconception is correct, this time.

"Now, I'm very flattered, Stelle, but will I have to expect this every time we talk?"

<Authority[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> How embarrassing. Pull yourself together, woman.

<Composure[Easy:Failed] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 5(Roll: 3 + Composure: 2)> Damn it, why does she have to be so pretty?

You're most certainly blushing, but manage to at least sputter out some apology.

<Suggestion[Medium:Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 13(Roll: 10 + Suggestion: 3)> You can still do something with this. Just say part of that previous thought aloud.

"I am really sorry… you're just far too pretty for my brain to handle." Any 'suaveness' that may have been there is absolutely ruined, but it's gained a more cutely-awkward edge to it.

A moment of stunned silence, followed by elegant laughter. "March did tell me about your sudden flirtatious streak. Well, thank you Stelle. You're quite pretty yourself."

Your cheeks are still burning, but she moves on effortlessly. It seems she's far better at dealing with this sort of conversation than you are…

"Would you like to join me for some coffee? I was just about to brew some, and thought I'd ask."

<Electrochemistry[Medium:Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 11> Oh, you most certainly would. Even if you were to ignore the incredibly beautiful woman you'd be sharing it with -which you shouldn't- that sweet sweet caffeine would already make it worth it.

"Yeah, that sounds nice." You can't actually remember having coffee, but if Electrochemistry is so excited, you must have liked it.

---

Minutes later, and the smell of coffee fills the parlor car. You've been watching Himeko go through all of the steps in a calm focus, humming to herself.

<Conceptualization[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> The tune flows in random directions throughout the process, it's likely she's simply making it up as she goes along.

"...and there we are. Do you have any preference for additives? Sugar or cream?"

<Perception[Trivial: Success] Trivial: 6 vs Your Total: 9> You aren't certain what coffee she brewed, but it smells incredibly strong. You should probably grab some sugar, at the least.

<Endurance[Medium: Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 11> Now hold on. Are you saying this body is so frail that some bitterness will take us out? She's not adding anything. We can handle it.

After shaking your head in response to her question and taking a sip… it's bitter. So very bitter. You have to stop yourself from visibly recoiling. Another sip, followed by another. You're slowly getting used to it.

"I'm surprised. I expected your reaction to be more like March's than Dan Heng's."

The way she says that implies this isn't a normal brew of coffee.

<Empathy[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Her eyes are alight in amusement. It seems she's played a prank on you, one that she's played on the others before as well.

<Esprit de Corps[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Dan Heng kept his cool, meanwhile March immediately ran to grab something to wash out the taste with.

"Sorry about that, I always like to see people's first experience with one of my brews. If you'd like to 'fix' your cup, March always adds two sugar packets and a fair bit of cream."

The rest of your chat with Himeko flows smoothly, as she regales you with tales of the previous times she's done this. The coffee was quite enjoyable after using March's method, and the caffeine gives you a nice buzz.

---

Your body still isn't in top condition, perhaps heading to bed early will help? First things first though, you stop by the Omni-Synthesizer on board. You have a wish of yours that needs acting on.

<Interfacing[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 11(Roll: 8 + Interfacing: 3)> After only a few minutes of testing(and some quick searches on your phone) you figure out how it operates.

In a procedure that doesn't make any sense to you, rainbow-colored lights coalesce into the output slot. When they fade away, they leave behind a bottle of blade oil, a whetstone, and a microfiber cloth.

<Logic[Impossible:Failed] Impossible: 20 vs Your Total: 8> Seriously, how in the hell does that work? You put in metal, 'solid water', mechanical parts and fucking protein rice.

<Inland Empire[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Magic is an incredible thing.

It doesn't matter right now, what's important is who this is for.

"While I thank you for the thought, Wielder… I am what that brat calls a 'Curio'. In theory I shouldn't require any upkeep of that sort."

Oh.

"...then why didn't you stop me?"

"Well, I tried, but you were a little too focused on that machine, it seems." Damn, you really thought this would be a nice step on your way to friendship. Maybe you could do it anyway? It'd be like… a massage, or the blade equivalent. "If you said this to anyone else, I would have told you to at least take them to dinner first, Wielder."

<Suggestion[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> It was rather forward.

<Rhetoric[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> Technically we didn't 'say' anything.

"However, I can't eat, and the relationship between wielder and blade is clearly far closer than any mere maiden. I'll accept your proposal." Success!

Hold on, though. Do you… know how to care for a sword?

"...I will guide you, Wielder."

---

You get into the groove of it pretty easily, Nameless' instructions are precise and clear. Eventually, after a period of silence between you, she speaks up.

"Wielder, I've been wanting to talk to you about something, but I've been struggling with the words." That's a rather terrifying way to start a conversation. "Perhaps… but it is rather important, so I hope you will hear me out."

<Empathy[Trivial:Success] Trivial: 6 vs Your Total: 9> Of course we will.

<Half-Light[Medium:Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 10> What if she wants to end our contract for some reason? What are we going to do without a sword?

<Suggestion[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> She's shown no sign of even contemplating it.

"...That's the problem." Were your skills too loud again that you missed a sentence? "No. The issue is your… 'skills'. Your mind is… confusing, Wielder. As though it's a ball of yarn with dozens of colored strings, and to do anything you need to pull them in different directions, making the knots even worse."

…But that's just how you think. Sure it might be strange -apparently- but if it works, why should it matter?

"Maybe so, but it concerns me nevertheless." She sighs, then continues. "If you do not wish to speak of it I will not force you to. Just know that if you ever need to talk, I'm here."

The conversation dies off, and you two return to a comforting silence. You contemplate that you didn't really talk much about her, but still, you feel a lot closer.

---

March's room is… very March? Filled with pastels, stuffed animals, and pictures.

<Perception[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A light fragrance of peppermint fills the air. Perhaps it's her favorite?

"Ah, Stelle! You're here earlier than I thought you'd be." March is sitting at a desk just to your left, photos covering it.

"I figured I'd sleep a little earlier. Make sure my injuries heal properly."

"While I can't lie and say I'm not disappointed we won't get to do any fun sleepover activities, I'm glad you're at least taking care of yourself." She motions to a mattress on the ground next to the bed, covered in fluffy blankets and pillows. "I set up a bed for you already! I'll make sure to stay quiet, so rest well! We'll need that energy for your first trailblazing expedition!"

<Electrochemistry[Medium:Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 11> Suggest sharing a bed, with a wink and a smirk.

<Volition[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total:9> Don't.

You quickly change your bandages, then lie down in the prepared bed. It is just as soft as expected. How much of her paycheck does March spend on blankets and the like? Do you even get paychecks? Maybe you should've asked Himeko about that earlier…

It really is quite soft…

You already feel yourself fading away… (+15 Health)

---

…and you're up again. Or maybe you're down? Left, right? A momentary uneasiness falls over you, before you recognize March's room, though now shrouded in darkness. It seems your sleep has decided to abruptly end, with no sign of a quick return. You can hear March's deep breathing to your right, and Nameless is… doing whatever she does instead of sleeping. Deep meditation? An Elven Trance? Who knows.

Well, that's fine. You have some things you'd like to research on this phone of yours. Quickly, your searches turn to those weird feelings you've been having lately. 'Masochism'? It's definition is close… but you mainly feel this way about battle injuries, certainly nothing sexual. Well, now that you think about it, you suppose there is some appeal-

<Volition[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total:9> Stay on topic, no need for tangential arguments.

Right. Still, there has to be a reason for your enjoyment, doesn't there? A reason for you to seek that pain. It's not as though you're suicidal, if anything, it's the opposite. That pain ensures you're alive, still breathing. Was it really so simple? It feels right, anyway. Though it certainly doesn't seem normal.

>High-Functioning Masochist, internalized.

<Logic[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> Not that that's surprising. You're anything but normal. A normal person wouldn't be here.

That… was a surprisingly caustic thought.

<Empathy[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A normal person doesn't have voices in their head.

<Inland Empire[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A normal person wouldn't need a talking sword to even suggest that might not be normal.

<Half Light[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A normal person doesn't continuously sprint into the most dangerous outcome.

<Volition[Legendary:Failed] Legendary: 14 vs Your Total: 9> We don't need to do this. Don't listen to-

<Reaction Speed[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Shut it. We won't let her run away into another dangerous scenario. Or get knocked out. Or hyperfixate on the closest pretty thing. She has to sit here, and think.

It's happening again… just like when you first woke up…

<Authority[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A normal person doesn't follow the first thing they get told to do without even a question.

<Visual Calculus[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> A normal person doesn't keep track of their abilities and well-being as numbers on a spreadsheet.

<Rhetoric[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Even if they did, I'm sure they would have the decency to do it correctly. 'Morale: 30/30'. What a joke.

Your breaths have grown shaky… and you can't seem to move…

<Pain Threshold[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 13> A normal person wouldn't be ignoring that pain in their heart, ever present.

<Shivers[Medium:Success] Medium: 10 vs Your Total: 11> Most importantly, a normal person wouldn't have chosen to erase their own memory.

Your breathing stops, and your heart beats wildly.

<Logic[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 8> It's the most logical conclusion you've been avoiding.

<Suggestion[Easy:Success] Easy: 8 vs Your Total: 9> Rather, you've been avoiding any conclusion at all.

<Pain Threshold[Medium:Success] Easy: 10 vs Your Total: 13> So, Stelle, can you feel that ache in your soul?

[] Yeah, it hurts…
You can't ignore that feeling anymore… you must have done this to yourself.

[] I don't feel a thing.
It must have been something different, maybe you didn't exist at all before that point, or you were some random bystander who got pulled in.