So You've Been Summoned By A Goddess: An Isekai Joint

This is still alive, just had to get my RL affairs in order. The next post will probably be Sunday or Monday due to more RL stuff.

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[X] Blessing of Intuition
[X] Kemonomimi-michi

You went with the Blessing of Intuition. Sure, your job was pretty physical and you really wanted a battle bikini, but becoming a mage was too good to pass up. It meant you could be the most magical girl with MAGICAL GIRL. It meant you could bring magic into the world.

Magic was something Shura-cho lacked, so you wanted to slather yourself in it.

Your last days in Shura-cho were grey and dull, the lurid reds and chiaroscuro blacks fading like old photographs. Your job became a chore. You grew to resent your partner chewing happily through corpses; he got to be happy but you were miserable.

Some days, you imagined yourself as him, mechanical and unyielding.

Some days, you imagined yourself as a corpse.

But that was then and this is now.

Disregarding the fact you're currently a corpse (probably), you're going to throw yourself into this Sinner's Arms quest. When you're given a job, you throw your all into it. The bags under your eyes are proof of that, of endless sleepless nights sewing fabric, drawing designs and cleaning crime scenes. That bloody idol job you were on took 24 hours of non-stop work.

When the last body was chum, the last bit of blood was cleaned and the last trace of evidence erased, you collapsed. The last thing you felt before coming here was your lips quirking up in a satisfied smile.

You give Inanna that same smile. "With your blessing, and Ariel's faith in me, I won't let you down."

Inanna gives you a doubting look. "Don't fuck this up, okay? Gotta rep to maintain."

"I had one complaint at my old job," you tell her, head bowed. "And that was for showing up to work in Stocking cosplay."

"As a dude?" Inanna asks, hesitantly.

"As a dude," you say, proudly.

Inanna throws her hands in the air. "Fuggit. I won't judge." She clearly wants to. "You could wear a thrice-damned bear suit as long as you get these weapons."

"Oh yeah," you poke her shoulder. "Can I get fox ears? And a tail?"

Inanna's face darkens. "You a furry?"

You clear the air with your hand. "Nah, I just like animal eared girls."

"Have you..." Inanna struggles with words and weirdness. "Have you dressed up as one?"

Your expression goes blank. "That'd make me a furry."

"...But you want ears and a tail."

"Yeah." You stick out your butt and make fox ears with your hands. Your partner acts as your tail. "Thick foxgirls are in right now, y'know?"

"I don't know, " Inanna grumbles, overwhelmed. "I just don't fucking know anymore."

With a snap of her fingers, you grow golden furred ears and a tail. Warmth floods through you, a whiskey burn compared to Ariel's delicate touch. Data scrolls before your eyes, explaining the functions of your new body's new powers.

You gawk like a child.

With another snap, Inanna summons her cigarette holder and a golden sofa. She plops upside down on the sofa and burns her cigarette to nothing. Her consternation melts to relaxation, then pleasure.

"Hooooooly hells," she exhales happily. "Nothing beats a post-bullshit smoke." She smiles at you playing with your ears and trying to catch your tail.

"Hey you. Crossplay." She points at you with her cigarette holder. "How'd you like to be a priestess of Inanna? You've got the body for it."

Your ears and tail perk up. The rest of you swiftly follows suit. "Do I?! Wait, do I?"

Ariel frantically gestures no.

You make a confused noise. "What's wrong, Ariel?"

"Priestesses of Inanna are temple prostitutes," Ariel says, flustered. "Also sacred assassins."

"That sounds cool!" Your brain catches up to your mouth. You squeak and cover yourself. Your tail wraps around your crotch, double-sealing it. "Prostitute?!"

Inanna bursts out laughing, her mirth shakes the ground(?) you stand on. "Yeah. Don't tell me you weren't trying to catch some dick with a special request like that." She frames your body with your hands.

"I didn't," you say, embarrassed enough to explode. "I just really like Helena Hex..."

"Oh you still think like a dude," Inanna says, grinning like a shark. "Well my priestesses get down with a little 'sisterly love', if you know what I mean." She gives you a backwards peace sign, wags her tongue between her fingers.

You gulp. You were a magical girl now, forbidden love came with the territory. You shake you head, whipping your hair back and forth. You were a virgin back in Shura-cho, you weren't ready to graduate to something so hardcore.

You hug your partner for protection from this lewd goddess. "W-What about Nico? He likes killing," you mumble, "and screwing..."

"What about him?" Inanna circles you in her quicksilver gold sofa. It reminds you of a shark. "And what about you? Too scared to say fuck?"

You shake your head no and squeeze your partner tight.

She presses against your back. Hard golden trinkets press into your softness. Her skin is noontide, her radiance is white heat and luster. "C'mon, don't be shy," Inanna whispers in your ear. "Repeat after me: F-U-"

With one hand, you grab her head for a Stunner. With the other, you clutch your partner like a life preserver.

Your Secret-Garden-O-Meter is redlining. You're afraid what will bloom if Inanna keeps pushing.

"That's enough, Inanna," Ariel says in Goddess Voice.

You feel a sonic boom that pushes Inanna off her sofa and on her ass. You and her look to Ariel, bewildered.

Ariel smiles softly at the both of you. "Nanna, don't tease the poor girl. Ashley, you don't have to do anything you don't want to." Her voice is gentle spring rain.

Inanna huffs, floating upright, legs butterflied. "Fine, mom." She flicks back her obsidian flow hair, golden trinkets jangling with the motion.

Ariel chuckles church bells. "Oh, to be a young goddess again." She really does feel like a mom. Or a grandma.

"I'm not young, dammit," Inanna says, sulking like a teenager. "You're just old." Her radiance dims.

Ariel goes pale with shock, fissures of galaxies crack her face. "O-Old?! Ashley, tell her I'm not old!"

"She's not old," you say to Inanna. "How old is she?"

Inanna floats over to you, grinning like a cat. "You wanna know? You really wanna know?"

"Don't say it, Nanna." Ariel's words hold a grave weight. Which is ruined by her shaking and watery eyes.

"Nah. You didn't put respect on my name." Inanna gives her a cheeky glance. "The great Ariel Ialdabaoth, First Among Gods, subjugated by yours truly, is..."

Ariel panics, her jade radiance reaching flashbang flashpoint. "STILL THY TONGUE, INANNA!"

Inanna whispers the number into your ear. "One."

The room begins to quake at magnitude 10. "I SAY THEE CEASE!"

"Hundred."

The room tears itself apart, the cracks get filled with gold. "CEASEEEEE!"

"Thousand."

Ariel, who has grown to tower over you and Inanna, cracks. The colors drain from her, leaving her a stained glass window of the universe. She quivers: cheeks puffed, lips pursed, eyes wide, before imploding.

You run over to her. Where she was, anyway. "Ariel? Ariel! Say something!"

You step on something squishy and sobbing. It's Ariel, rendered into a green slime.

You pick her up, she hides her face in your hands. "Please kill me..."

You cradle Ariel so she can see you. Your blue eyes sparkle. "It would be an honor to have you be my first experience points."

Ariel recoils. "Eh?"

"You wanted to die," you say, thr idea of game mechanics exciting you. "And if you become my experience points, it's like we're together forever, right? Wouldn't that be great?"

You see your geeky mania reflected in Ariel's translucent body. "Er, I'd rather watch over you from outside." She pauses. "I'd need to be alive for that."

"Oh," you say, feeling strangely hurt. "Groovy."

"I could send you with him, Ari," Inanna says.

"Her," you and Ariel say sternly.

"Her." Inanna swipes her hand in the air, a suspiciously yonic golden portal spreads open before you.

"Now why would you go and do that," you ask. "Not that I mind, but don't you need Ariel here for goddess stuff and stuff?"

'Just lookin' out," Inanna shrugs. "Useless goddesses make pretty good cheat skills."

"Useless?!" Ariel undulates with barely contained fury.

You frown, hugging Ariel. "Do you ever stop being a jerk?"

"I fuck with people I like," Inanna says, a throne of skulls and weapons rising to place her above you. She looks down, grinning like a shark again. "And I like you, Crossplay. I like you so much, I'm going to give you a chance to test out your new powers right now."

Your danger sense is tingling. Gently, you put Ariel down and grab your partner. Your choker hums with power, you see red warning run past your eyes.

"That's the spirit," Inanna says cheerfully. "Always good to have an Isaac up for a fight." She rests her head on her fist, a bemused smile on her face. "In the name of Inanna: Mother Mayhem, Iron Maiden, Empress of the Little Death, you are blessed. Offer unto me thy tithe of blood, thy pound of flesh, and thou shalt live forever. Now kneel."

Your choker glows gold, Inanna's godly power at your throat. You fall to a knee, clutch at your choker until it turns pink again.

You're here to do a job, not to bow.

A magical girls bows to no one.

Not even a goddess.

You get back on your feet, revving your partner to share his strength.

Inanna whistles and licks her lips. "Oooh, you're gonna be fun."

You give her a scary grin of your own. "I'll be the best you ever had, babe."

...That sounded cooler in you head. And way less lewd.

You toss your hair and turn your back on Inanna, hopefully hiding you blush. You stride with false confidence through the suspicious portal. Your partner growls in your hand, warning anyone who would try to take your ample back.

[Where does the suspicious portal take you?]
[ ] Into the training chambers of Princess Suplexed
[ ] In the middle of the Adventuring Angels...getting ambushed
[ ] Staring down the barrel at Nico's twin sister
[ ] Face to face with a Demon Lord