A thick leather bound book holding records of a foreigner's travels in the Lands Between.
Coming to SV late since I was only recently reminded to post here.
also, I don't have any planned update schedule, just posting a new part whenever I finish it.
I have been staring at this blank page for several minutes now
not really knowing how I should start, so I'm just going to
start writing my thoughts down as they come.
I'm honestly not quite sure why I bought this thing off Kale in
the first place, The purchase of whim cost my last few
hundred runes even if it wasn't as expensive as most of the
other things I purchased. Just being a plain blank book and this
strange metal 'pencil' thing that you fill with ground up charcoal
and then compress into a usable nub with a screw press.
It's pretty odd, but it's worked so far even without an eraser.
But I guss it will be good for me to get my thoughts down on
paper and out of my head, because I could certainly use some
sort of stress relief after my last few days.
It'll also serve as proof, I guess.
Both of my existance and the things I've gone through, and
likely will go through in the future.
Though it isnt very likely anyone besides myself is likely to read
this unless I lose the book.
Or die.
But I really dont want to think about that outcome right now.
I dont want to cry in front of Boc and Kale... again
I have to have some dignity left damn it.
I suppose I should write about my last few days?
That sounds like it would probably be a good idea.
It still doesnt quite feel real.
Sometimes I feel like i'll simply wake up at home in bed, and
this will all have been a weird dream I could laugh about later.
Maybe putting it to paper will help with that feeling?
It all started a few days ago after I had gotten home from a
particularly tiring day at work. I had been unloading boxes
all day and Mitch had been being especially shitty, so when the
day was out I had just gone straight home.
Too tired to even change out of my clothes I just flopped into
bed and was out like a light.
I'm not really sure what happened after that other than
I'd had a terrible nightmare, and all I can recall of it is...
Something about shaking a cold, clammy, corpse-like hand,
Bits of running through a dark forest with something chasing,
And then suddenly falling.
I'm not sure how much of that was actually a dream or if it
was something more, but when the feeling of falling startled
me awake I was no longer in my bed, or even in my home.
Instead I was on the beach of that small island off the coast
the one with the crumbling Dragon Communion church on it.
Needless to say I did not take to this situation with some stoic,
calm, analytical mien.
No, I started panicking.
I tried pinching myself to try and wake up again, then when
that didnt work I started checking myself over.
finding that besides being wet, cold and covered in sand, I
was unharmed and my things were still in my pockets, however
my phone had been soaked and ruined.
And only after all that did I finally look up and see The Erdtree.
And gods above, the game did not do it justice in the slightest.
I dont think I have the words to describe it properly.
In most ways it does look a lot like it did in the game, being an
unfathomably tall golden tree looming over the entire land, but
it is so SO much more than that in person.
It's a truly haunting sight, inspiring this almost fearful Awe
within my heart if I stare at it for too long.
Even if I somehow get back home and never see it again,
I don't believe I will ever manage to forget how it just goes up
and up and up until it's branches become the very sky itself.
Its bark is this ephemeral, eldritch gold which plays tricks on
the eye. Appearing both translucent and opaque, and both
loomingly close yet immeasurably far all at the same time.
And it has this sort of Presence, like the golden light it emits
has a physical weight to it, but at the same time that it
presses you down it is lifting you up.
Yet, despite these seemingly contradictory feelings, it doesn't
feel dissonant.
Instead it feels like I am simply incapable of processing the
true feelings which the Erdtree evokes, or the sights that I
am seeing, and that what I feel is just my brain's best
attempt at comprehension.
When I first gazed upon it's golden light I truly understood why
it was a figure of divine worship in the Lands Between,
because if the Erdtree isnt divine, then what possibly could be?
I don't know just how long I spent sitting in the sand, struck
dumb by the sight of the Erdtree before I came back to my
senses but I eventually managed to pry my eyes away from it.
Then, since I wasn't blindly panicking or completely mesmerized
by the sight of the erdtree anymore I started actually taking
in my surroundings, recognizing that i was both in the Lands
Between and stuck on the Dragon Communion church island.
I knew that my situation was bad even back then.
Stuck in a dangerous no-mans-land with nothing but the cheap
clothes on my back, a waterlogged phone, and a useless wallet.
The multitool knife James got me for my birthday a few years
back being the only actually useful thing I had on me.
But after I wandered up the hill to the church and could not
spot even a glimpse of grace, I realized my situation was even
worse than I first thought.
Whatever a Tarnished actually is, and however they are
supposed to came back from the dead with grace isnt an option
for me because as far as I can tell, I am not one.
I am still as human as they come.
With all the fragility and mortality that entails.
I was not happy with this reminder of my mortality, and it took
the the cold seawinds picking up and cutting straight through
my wet clothes to get me off my ass and looking for a way to
get off the island. It really isnt far off the coast, but the
problem is
I. Don't. Swim.
I can't do it. I wont do it. Not again.
Just No. Fuck.
I hate deep water and being wet.
If I am in water and my feet cant touch the ground I panic.
No water for me, I don't even like rain.
I was desperate to get off the island and to somewhere
warmer before I froze my tits off but I was not going to swim.
That just would have been a quick way to drown embarassingly
right off the shore.
With swimming firmly crossed out I started thinking about my
chances for getting through the cave that connected the island
with the mainland unharmed, and I didnt give myself good odds
at getting past all the Demi-Humans in there.
But as I was staring off toward the mainland, watching one
of those gross giant land-squids undulate down the beach I saw
movement.
I hid behind a driftwood log and watched as what had to
have been most of the Demi-Humans who lived in the cave file
out from the dark and head off as a group to go attack the
land-squid I had been watching. Then just after the hunting
group was out of sight another Demi-Human with a torch, Boc,
came out of hiding and sprinted into the cave behind them.
I took the obvious opportunity, practically presented to me on a
silver platter and, taking a driftwood stick with me, decended
into the island side cave entrance.
I'd never actually considered just how pitch black caves are until
then, but after only a few feet I couldnt even see my hand in
front of my face. Honestly it was a miracle how I didnt trip and
break my neck or otherwise injure myself in the dark, but I
somehow managed to stumble my way into the main, flooded
cavern where I encountered my first Demi-Human, who was
snoozing by one of the small fires lighting the room.
I really didnt want to stay in the room with the Demi-Human.
but I took the risk to stick around a few moments in order
to search for anything I could use, though I didnt end up finding
much of use in my quick search.
It was mostly just rubbish and bones, but I did manage to find
Boc's tailoring kit, which I tucked into my shirt, and a large
scrap of ...unpleasantly... oily cloth which I wrapped about my
driftwood stick and lit on a nearby fire before quietly wading
to the exit.
Most of the rest of the cave was empty as well, at least until
I was nearing the exit where I could hear a commotion and see
the flickering of firelight.
I put out my improvised torch and crept around the bend,
finding a Demi-Human standing over Boc and cruelly kicking him
in the ribs and laughing as he groaned in pain.
they were far to distracted to notice me sneaking up behind
until I reared back and smashed my stick into the back of their
head hard enough to snap it in half and drop the Demi-Human
into a groaning stupor on the floor.
Then I scooped Boc up off the floor into a fireman carry and
sprinted out into the sunlight, staying low and hugging the cliff
face as I made my escape.
It was the most terrified I have ever been, and my blood was
thundering in my ears as I watched the hunting party work
together to pin down and cut tentacles off of the land-squid,
muttering prayers under my breath for them not to spot me
until I slipped between the cliff and the giant block of masonry.
I let the still winded Boc down on the sand before I peeked
back around the block to watch the hunt, seeing that the
Demi-humans had finished chopping off the squid's main
tentacles and were now hurriedly dragging their bounty back to
the cave, so I jerked my head back before they could see me.
I flopped against the stone and exhaled deeply, limbs like jelly
with relief.
While I was resting Boc began talking with me, and I
pretended to not know who he was until introductions were
made. Then we passed a bit talking while I tried to get my
legs to stop shaking. I ended up handing his sewing kit over to
him when he brought it up, and he was overjoyed about it.
But eventually I managed to get back on my feet and it was
fairly easy to hike up the incline from there, with the only hiccup
being when we had to hide in a bush to avoid a giant. Thankfully,
their undead nature has left them pretty stupid so it just
lumbered on past us.
We climbed until we spotted the ruins of the Church of Elleh
which I beelined toward, arriving at just in time for a thin blue
mist to roll out of it.
The next thing I know i'm waking up next to a campfire, having
been dragged into the ruins when I remained asleep for longer
than kale or Boc after Ranni's sleep mist had faded.
And that's how I spent my first day in the Lands between.
So I had made my way over to Kale's camp with Boc, then got
knocked out for a few hours and dragged over to the campfire.
A great first impression no doubt, only further improved when
my stomach began loudly growling mid-sentence as I was
introducing myself.
Embarrassing.
Kale tossed me a chunk of mystery jerky as a pity freebie, which
I ate while we had a vaguely awkward conversation.
I kind of wonder what that must have been like from his
perspective.
Some random woman stumbles into your camp looking like a
drowned rat, eats some of your food, and then asks you to
explain common sense things like how money is used, or
what time of year it was.
(a ritual gesture which turns
the immaterial runes you've
absorbed into golden dust
which you can measure out and
re-absorb from there.)
(and also early spring.)
In brief, I had no idea how I got here, I had no idea what I
was doing, And finally, I did not have any money.
This last fact was significantly more important to Kale than
my general strangeness, so by the end of the conversation Kale
basically told me that I would need to go out and either
get good or die, because he wasn't going to give my broke ass
any more of his stuff for free.
Albeit in significantly more polite wording.
In the end I had to take his advice.
I didn't have many other options.
So I left the church ruins, alone as Boc stayed at the church,
and started wandering the nearby countryside searching for
objects of value.
I Didn't find anything.
Much harder to find small items in a grassy field when they
don't have glowing pickup markers.
The only real thing of note that i'd found was the Tree Sentinel
and its horse. Thankfully, both were dead in the field,
presumably slain by the Tarnished.
The Sentinel's armor had been dented to hell and ruined and its
horse was rather notably missing an entire foreleg and had
plowed into the ground hard enough to leave a trail through
the dirt.
It's kinda scary, the sheer inhuman strength the Tarnished
must have to be able to do that much damage.
I was kind of surprised to see them at the time.
Partially because I had stupidly forgotten that they would've
been there, and also because in game they kinda just.. vanish
when you kill them, but it doesn't really work like that here.
things linger and, well, they rot too as their corpses could
attest.
Anyway, there wasn't really anything I could take from the
corpse. The sentinel seemed to not have carried supplies with
it, its halberd was missing and its armor was too ruined and
covered in rancid corpse juices to bother with.
Having found nothing which I could actually use, I began
looping back around toward the small copse of trees north-east
of the church of Elleh.
It was a riskier trip, because I'd known that the area was
supposed to be patrolled by soldiers, but desperation has made
people do stupider shit before.
But when I got there I only found more bodies, slain by the
Tarnished.
But they had still been…
Fresh.
Not the first time I had seen a dead body in person.
Even the Sentinel hadn't taken that dubious honor.
But that was the first time I had seen so much gore in person.
I don't know what came over me, seeing those dead bodies, nor
do I kow why I followed the trail of carnage.
It just didn't feel real at the time, seeing these enemies that
I had slain innumerable times from behind a screen, just strewn
across the ground.
I guess the "why" doesn't really matter.
I ended up following the trail toward the screams and fighting
that I had been faintly hearing in the distance, clearing the
edge of the woods to watch as a massacre occurred in the
encampment below .
The best way I can describe it is as if it were a scene pulled
straight out of Berserk.
A single armored figure with an oversized sword brutally
cutting down fleeing soldiers like so much chaff.
It was just so mesmerizingly horrible, I couldn't stop watching.
God Damnit.
That just reminded me I'm probably never gonna see how
Berserk ends. or any of the other series I followed for that
matter…
This sucks, I want to go home.
Bleh.
Spent a while feeling sorry for myself by the fire, ate, and
complained for a bit at Boc before he went to bed.
He didn't really get it, but it was nice to just have someone to
vent to, and I'm feeling good enough to finish my little recap.
The Tarnished killed off all the soldiers without leaving any
survivors, then summoned torrent to ride into the cliffside pass.
After some internal debate I ended up scrambling down the hill
into the encampment, and start lookng for thinks to steal.
I wasnt likely to find a better opportunity than that to get
myself equiped.
The Tarnished didnt spend much time looting, so while several
notable items were missing from the camp I still got a lot.
In the end I scavenged:
Some equipment from a weapons tent.
(spear, handaxe, crossbow, metal cap
+ A number of spare weapons to sell)
A new, warmer outfit from a box of
random bloody clothes and accesories.
(robe, cloak, boots, gloves, sling bag)
A tent in noticably better condition
then all the others had a collection
of valuables within.
(a pouch of rune dust, + the
small gemstones and chainmail
from a Nomadic Merchant's garb)
It was about the time I found the armory tent for the
footmen that whatever detached fugue I had been in finally
popped and it hit me that I had been rifling through the
belongings of the recently murdered and was now covered in
blood.
The fact that the tent had been half collapsed by the bisected
torso of one of said footmen, having been flung into one of its
poles, had apparently been the last straw.
I got sick, I hyperventilated, and got sick again from the smell
and taste of the air.
I didn't end up staying much longer after that, grabbing a few
last things before I couldnt take it any longer, packing up my
loot and just running back through the woods to the church.
When i got back Kale congratulated me on returning alive, and
even managing to find something worthwhile.
but it had gotten late, and I had been exhausted both mentally
and physically, and I ended up falling asleep leaning against my
stolen loot after sitting by the fire for a bit to calm down.
I woke up just before morning all stiff and sore.
As it turns out, passing out on the cold hard ground, half-leaning
against a bundle containing hard and pointy objects, is not
exactly conducive to comfortable sleep.
Who would have guessed.
But even ignoring that, it was not a good morning for me.
I just sat for a while after I woke up and quietly cried, trying
not to wake up either of the others.
I was sore, and tired, and hungry.
I had just gotten myself covered in mud and blood and had to
steal from corpses.
But most of all I just wanted to go home, I wanted to go back
to my life.
Waking up and still being here just…
I just sat there for a bit and wept in the pre-morning
darkness, until I was startled by Kale lightly coughing to get
my attention.
He tossed me another piece of jerky and some water, and let me
sit in silence as the sun crept over the horizon, and Boc woke
from his sleep as well.
It took a while but eventually I pulled myself back together.
Tears ran dry and were wiped away, runny nose blown, and
hiccups subdued.
Then I got to work.
I unwrapped my bundle and started sorting the things I would
be keeping into a pile.
The clothes had bloody holes and tears in them, and I washed
them thoroughly before I spent several hours patching them
up to a reasonable standard with Boc.
It had been pretty relaxing to sew again, especially with
someone else who appreciated the art, and it helped me get out
of the dark mood I'd been in all morning.
When we were done fixint the clothes, I took the remaining
items to Kale and started laying them out to sell.
I can't hoestly say if he paid me fairly, fleeced me, or even gave
me a good deal.
I've never properly haggled or bartered before and I'm still not
quite sure how much runes are really worth here.
But it doesn't matter, since I ended up having enough to get
what I wanted from him and a little bit more.
Kale's last crafting kit, travel supplies, and his cracked pots.
Interesting things those pots are.
I had kind of assumed that they had just been video game
abstractions, but no, they're real.
Kale explained how they work to me after I bought one. He said
it was some sort of innate magic? It binds to you when you
smear some of your blood on the script on the inside of the pot,
and after that it would make its way back to you the moment
you stopped looking at it.
kinda like a less murderous Weeping Angel?
It's weird, but it's useful.
I also told him about finding the Nomad Merchant's things in
the camp. however he had already guessed that his kin was
dead, but he appreciated that I confirmed his suspicions
nonetheless.
He told me that he would not begrudge me keeping the
chainmail, remarking that I'd have more use for it.
Instead he offered to give me some more in depth advice in
exchange for the gemstones that were pulled off from the
clothes which I tentatively accepted.
I still feel uncomfortable with having -sold- his dead kin's
belongings back to him, but apparently it's a cultural thing for
them. both the gemstones and not giving or taking anything of
significant value without some sort of trade.
So I handed over the pouch of gemstones and he gave me an
impromptu lecture on the making and handling firebombs, and on
how to properly take care of my new metal armor and weapons.
By the time I had repaired all my new equipment, made my
purchases and Kale finished his little crash course the day had
passed and the sun was beginning to set.
The nights here are so alien.
the unfamiliar moons, the Erdtree's light, the strange colors of
the sky.
I could spend hours watching it all.
I tried to get some sleep, but just couldn't get my thoughts to
calm. But after a while I had a half baked idea, and asked Kale
if he happened to sell anything for writing.
He thought for a few seconds then started rummaging around
in his stock, before pulling out this book.
Runes swapped hands for the last time of the day, and then I
began writing.
And so ends my third day in the Lands Between.
Now that I've gotten this all down on the paper and out of my
head I'm actually feeling much better.
I think I can actually get some sleep now that my thoughts
aren't so jumbled up anymore.
