Isekai adventures of Nihilo and UbeOne in the world of Neptunia
The "Dark Souls" of Self-Insert Trash [Neptunia] [Dual-SI]
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Chapter 1: Drop-In
UbeOne
Daydreaming CPU
- Location
- Philippines
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Chapter 1
The sun was shining, the clouds were floating, the birds were singing, and to all appearances, it was a fine day. Probably not as much to three figures, however, as they were currently sandwiched in between a cushiony thing called air resistance and an accelerator known as gravity.
Among all the things that could happen, falling from the sky was what the young woman least expected, and it all started with a portal, outlined in yellow, right below her feet. What was even worse was that she was going down the stairs at the time.
She couldn't even hear her own voice, her ears being buffeted by the wind, as she found herself skydiving in open air, with no ground to stand on. It felt even worse than what she imagined, that sudden sensation of falling, of dropping, of that future impact with the ground.
A glance to her side, however, showed a purplette in a parka dress that she'd recognize from fiction anywhere, as well as some guy in tactical gear who wouldn't look out of place in Metal Gear. There was just a teensy little issue though. They were way too close, like, less than six feet apart, and she couldn't move away. What about social distancing?! She was at home before all this; she didn't even have a mask on!
Her internal screaming, however, was swiftly drowned out by the far louder external screaming of the man by her side, whose own thoughts on the situation he left exceedingly clear in no less than three languages, "-HITSHITSHITSHIT, M'HA CAGO EN DEU, LA CREU I EL FUSTER QUE LA FEU, HIJO DE LA GRANDISIMA PUTA, A QUIN MALPARIT SE LI ACUDEIX-"
Still, for all that he was busy showing off his admittedly impressive lung capacity, his hands were moving awfully steady, stashing away the shield and hammer… somewhere in his backpack. Look, when an article of clothing literally slurps up a solid five plus kilos of steel like an hyperactive blonde inhales ramen, you nod and move right on. Communal pity party of logic and all good sense off in the corner aside, the fact of the matter was that the man was now holding a couple of ropes tipped by clip hooks.
And, wonder of wonders, he had deigned interrupting his commendable attempt at dying the air black and blue to speak some sense, although he was still hollering to be heard over the wind, "You two grab these and pull yourselves closer! I got a parachute and I'd rather not have two human hamburgers on my conscience!"
And that was a quick reminder to the woman that there were more immediate concerns, like the ground swiftly rising up to meet her. Somehow, the only one who had a landing strategy available was the Snake-like guy with colorful language and impressively loud voice. Nodding, she grabbed onto the rope and reeled herself in. Beside her, she could see a certain protagonist doing the same, though she could also hear snippets of comments, something about derails.
"Watch out for the jank! I don't want you two dying to bit-off tongues!" was all the warning he gave before he gave one of the cords poking out from his backpack a sharp pull, the parachute unfolding with a fwoosh a fraction of a second before they were jarred by the sudden switch from terminal velocity to survivable clip.
It felt like an application of full brakes, one that was surely felt by the woman. Still, the sense of freefall was replaced by that of gliding, albeit more of gentle falling than going anywhere. A glance downwards, however, showed that the ground was covered by green forest, and there was little space for clearings.
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The search for a landing spot had been less than successful, as the mouthful of leaves the man was spitting out could attest to. At least his backpack was able to slurp the parachute back in with no regard whatsoever for all the branches tangling it up, leaving all three standing on an awfully convenient branch, what with it being plenty thick and sturdy enough to hold the lot of them without issue.
Downside? Big branch meant big tree. The ground was still far away enough just hopping off all but guaranteed some broken legs, but not far enough that he could deploy the parachute again.
More material for that one corner of his mind to keep on screaming and crying on about, the rest of him was busy tying some rope to where the branch merged with the trunk and rappelling down the sequoia wannabe as if he'd done it a thousand times, when he was quite sure he was just a slob of a biotech major who only knew exercise by reputation, thank you very much.
He shook his head. Breakdown later, get to safety now. Now, to get the girls he'd… admittedly forgotten about for a second there, what with all the internal screaming… anyhow, to get them down from there, "Aight, either you two climb down the rope, or you just jump off and I catch you! Take your pick!"
While the woman was agonizing over her choices, neither of which she felt confident on, the purplette opted to take the plunge. "Geronimoooo…!"
He managed to catch the ballistic eggplant easily enough, muscle memory he had no right to have ensured she didn't crack her head against the plating of his vest, nor smash any of his gear, for that matter.
"Phew, there we go." he muttered as he set her down, wondering how much of her lightness was from being a slip of a girl and how much was his brand new muscles.
"How do I climb down the rope?" The other girl asked, cupping her mouth with her hands. It was something she never did in real life, and she wasn't quite a fan of freefalling again. She was sure there was a certain technique to it, one that she was unaware of. Her mouth was momentarily covered as she heard her own voice, only to smile afterwards. She finally sounded like the girl she was, and amusingly, she also sounded like a certain Gungnir wielder. On a side note, she realized she was somehow wearing yellow gloves, despite not doing so before all this. They were a tad heavier than she thought, too.
He managed to restrain himself from replying with an 'With your hands', punting his sass back to the corner. Instead, what he delivered was a crash course on rappelling ala verbal diarrhea, courtesy of him having to scramble to rack the mess of information carelessly dumped on his poor brainmeats. Still, it got the point across.
"Good going, skipping on the actual exposition." piped in the purple head whose identity he was still halfway in denial about, "The readers aren't here for a lesson on rappelling ripped off Wikipedia."
...Speaking of denial.
To the other girl, it felt as if the guy went 'yadda yadda yadda', yet was fully understood anyway. So that was how to do the abseiling thing. She put words into action, starting with wrapping the rope around herself in a certain way, holding onto it, and walking down the trunk…
She was internally screaming as she descended. It would be so much easier if she had chakra or something. Still it was at least partly offset by the different, yet welcoming feeling and appearance her body had. She was finally physically a girl, her body fixed. She also noted that her hair was longer now, and a nice orange in hue.
…
"And there you go too," the man muttered, again, as he helped the lass out of the rope his backpack was all too happy to slurp right up, once again ignoring trifles such as common sense and logic, alongside his knotwork. "Now, le-"
And that's about when a ballistic dog-faced pile of blue gelatin tried to tackle his head off.
Instead, it got to give the nearby foliages a coat of blue paint as yet more reflexes he hadn't signed up for kicked in and saw him pulling out a handgun from god knew where and double tap the unfortunate monster.
He was done with today.
He took a bracing sigh, his free hand rubbing at the bridge of his nose to try and bunt the migraine he was building up to, "So, as I was sa-" his arm snapped out, the gun barking out a quartet of shots and the forest sporting a pair of new splotches of blue.
He turned his head to the thick foliage that was so intent on throwing random encounters at him, his tone about as murderous as he was feeling, "Interrupt me again and I burn this whole forest down, I am having a godawful day and some therapeutic pyromania sounds fucking heavenly right about now."
The underbrush rustled as seemingly every monster in earshot made the wise decision of bravely running away.
Good.
"As I was saying..." he let it hang for a moment, making sure he wouldn't be interrupted a third time, "We ought to get moving, I think I saw some skyscrapers off in the distance thataway while we were on the air."
The female with sensible hair colour flinched at the gunshots and the scary-sounding threat, even though those were directed at the very real dogoos nearby. It was also then that she realized she had inadvertently taken a loose stance, her left foot forward, and her gloved hands balled into fists and positioned to guard her head. Where did that come from? She heard of the basics, but was no practitioner herself, yet it felt almost natural to do now. Better than being helpless, though.
She made herself relax a bit and hugged herself as the slimy threats ran off. "Yep." Another thing she noticed is that her outfit was different. Colored in yellow and black, the jacket, dress and all reminded her of a bumblebee. Combined with her ginger hair and her newfound instinct, she was reminded of a certain personification of the old PC Engine, albeit aged up. Even her own voice sounded the part.
"So, how'd you two end up in the sky?" She asked her newfound companions as they walked, albeit also stumbling on her part as she acclimated to a different sense of weight. A certain familiar music was in the background, and it was pleasant to hear. The purplette, meanwhile, was very much a dead ringer for a certain goddess from Planeptune, and the sight of her at freefall brought to mind the beginning of a certain first Rebirth.
"Tumbled out of bed into a portal, it went downhill from there." he grumbled, his free hand back to massaging the bridge of his nose, while the one holding the gun had lowered to point at the ground and had its finger firmly off the trigger.
The purple-headed girl's face told them she'd tried to rack her brain for the answer and instead run headfirst into a brick wall, with about as big a concussion as one could expect. A light prod to the side of her head snapped her out of it just fine, at least. He dutifully ignored the mutinous mutters about enforced protagonist amnesia and lazy writing.
"I was going downstairs when suddenly, portal." For the other girl, currently waving her arms to balance herself, she had a confused expression at the goddess. Why couldn't the latter remember, when she didn't hit her head this time? It didn't sound good when it was implied it was merely forced on her. "Any idea where those came from?"
"The portals? None whatsoever," he replied with a shake of his head, "I barely even got a glimpse of mine, what with waking up only half a second before I fell through." He paused, a thought hitting as he pulled out a pair of binoculars and scanned the stretch of sky they'd fallen from. At least as much as could be done through the canopy. Still, the glowing rings would've stood out against the backdrop something fierce, "Aaaaand nope, no sight of them up there. Must've closed after us." he grumbled as he stashed the piece of gear back into his possibly eldritch bag, resuming his walk.
The talking and the stashing reminded the still-wobbly Peashy-lookalike of something that she should have recalled sooner. "...Do any of you have extra face masks?"
The shortest of the three wasted no time turning her pockets inside out, slumping slightly at her grand inventory of three pieces of linen and a spare button, "No starting gear DLC for me, huh?"
The man, meanwhile, was giving a critical eye to the full-face gas mask his backpack had spat out at him. Further prodding of the possibly sentient bag only produced a couple of spare filters for the thing. He sighed, stashing them back, "Just the one, it looks like. You can have it, I've been shut in for well over a month without a single trip outside, so I ought to be clear myself." Nevermind how he'd been shoved into the body of a Rhodes Island operator going by the rook insignias everywhere on his gear. In particular, the designated gacha game prologue casualty, Ace, if the mug he'd seen reflected on his gun was anything to go by. Filled him with confidence, it did.
"Thanks." The ginger-haired woman was also pretty much confined at home, but it would be better safe than sorry, though not for herself, but for others. Wearing the wide-visored thing did remind her of the news though, where a senator wore a gas mask during a meeting for sarcasm purposes. "Actually, what are your names?" She continued, having decided on going by who she looked like. "I'm Peashy."
"Ace," he replied easily, the package deal he'd been suckered into apparently including having that feel as natural as his real name. Nevermind it being supposed to just be the character's callsign as per the overwhelming majority of operators. Bah.
The violette, meanwhile, raised a finger towards the sky and grinned. It even came with sparkles. "And I'm the protag of protags, Neptune!"
The man slumped, so much for that denial. Welcome to the Neptunia series, have fun with your isekai adventure and try not to think too hard on how you may just be the figment of some bored author's imagination with no true free will to speak of. Yey.
Good thing Neptune still remembered her name, and it was also a confirmation of Peashy being in one of her favorite series. It also brought to mind something though. Which Gamindustri were they in? From the looks of things, it was the Superdimension, but she could be mistaken. Where was Compa?
"Nice to meet you Ace, Neptuna," she said. Normally she'd offer her hand, but considering the circumstances, that was not the best idea.
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It was one thing for Peashy, who was more acclimated to her body now, to see the futuristic city on a screen. It was another, a wonder on the eyes which no longer needed glasses, to see the aforementioned post-modern metropolis for real, all behind a stylized entrance arch that read 'Welcome to Planeptune', and a shift in the music to something calmer. She kinda looked out of place, however, seeing that people were walking close together and not wearing any masks. It may be Gamindustri, a different world, but it was also a different norm from what she had to adjust to these days. "So, where to first?" She inquired from her companions. "I'm thinking, the Guild, or maybe somewhere to stay."
"Guild." was Ace's immediate answer, "If by the time the sun's out we haven't made enough cash to get a room somewhere, we can always camp in a park or alleyway, not much in the way of abandoned buildings to squat in here." He scratched his beard, humming in thought, "We should also see about getting a checkup at some clinic or other, figure out if we got corona and if so get it cured with all this magic and sci-fi bullshit flying around. I'd rather not have to waste those fancy filters and do all this tiptoeing around."
"Yeesh, talk about nitty-gritty." groused Neptune in the background, "Where's my cushy JRPG intro?"
Not the most glamorous of stuff, but what could they do? "Clinic sounds best," the yellow one replied, the idea reminding her of a certain ex-nurse-in-training, "How about you, Neptuna?"
"Wha-! Oh!" she visibly startled, snapped out of her grumbling, "Yeah, yeah, let's get that plot-mandated limping out of the way. Gotta advance the plot a bit before they let you go hog-wild with the open world and side-quests, yeah?"
"Yep. Gotta grind levels and credits too," the other girl added, "And help Histy, and befriend allies and goddesses..."
"Oi! No spoilers!"
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As he'd halfway expected, they got a clean bill of health. He had to agree with Neptune that it was an all but obligatory part of the isekai package, but it paid to be sure.
Best part: It hadn't cost them a single credit.
Ah, anime women in sci-fi fetish wear bless free healthcare.
After that, it had been a quick trip to the Guild to get registered --also free, eat your heart out Konosuba-- and grab a double armload of bottom-tier quests on the forest to the east of the city. Gathering ones for every common resource in the area, and culling ones to get paid for all the random encounters they would have to wade through anyways. Nothing like hitting multiple boxbirds with one blast.
In the here and now, they were on the outskirts of Planeptune, staring at the treeline.
Ace sighed, bracing himself for what he expected to be a Zubat marathon, "Well, time to terrorise th-"
Neptune had plans of her own, raising her wooden sword-in-the-garbage that proclaimed her God-Queen of Planeptune skywards as she charged, "LEEEEERRRRRRROOOO-"
His hand snapped out like a viper, hooking on Neptune's hoodie with a vice grip, leaving her to cough and putter as her charge had her chokeslammed with her collar. This girl was going to be the death of him, "Tanks first." That and his pants-on-head retarded decision to play the tank. Sure, it made sense from a logical standpoint given his build and gear, but he'd much rather not be first in line to get his face eaten off. Him and his bleeding heart, he swore to fuck.
"Awww." pouted the suicidal little munchkin, but ultimately bowed to the laws of gamer protocol.
"Don't worry," Peashy gave the goddess a pat on the shoulder, "We'll DPS while he aggro's." There was something amusing about applying gaming terminology to very real quests, and she was less inclined to taking hits anyway.
"Hey, at least you two won't be the ones covered head-to-toe in slime and sap at the end of the day." he offered as consolation as he heaved up his shield and brought up his pistol, starting to march into the forest following the goatrail the pics they'd been provided pointed them to.
"Thanks." For the yellow fighter's part, she had her gloved hands prepared to guard herself. Something she found in her surprisingly deep pockets was a pair of yellow brass knuckles, and she wore them accordingly. If Iffy could get away with entire katars, then hers wouldn't be a big deal either.
True to form, they weren't three steps in when the music shifted to a more energetic piece, and the first batch of pug-faced sludges and ambulatory flowers decided to accost them, getting instantly ventilated. Issue was…
"GAH! What's this encounter design?!" Neptune yelped as she batted away the dogoo who'd tried to get the literal drop on her from the branches, while they'd been focused on the group of monsters at the front.
The dopey-faced bags of EXP had gotten the memo on flanking and ambush tactics. It was the party that was hit by a Symbol Attack.
"I didn't know they were smart!" The batted dogoo was actually flying towards Peashy, which she proceeded to throw a jab and a straight at. She felt newfound instincts guiding her limbs as the blue slime was flung towards a tree trunk, making a juicy splat on impact.
"We got Dark Souls-style enemy placement, fucking typical." Ace grumbled, shifting mental gears to full CONSTANT VIGILANCE as he finished blasting the sneaky little shit of a tulip he'd pinned under his shield.
He was sure the forest wouldn't appreciate all the shot off branches and uprooted underbush courtesy of judicious ambush checks, but that's what it got for enabling this sneeki breeki fuckery.
He allowed himself a smile as he drank in the terrified yelps and barks of the little demons as he smoked them out from their ambush spots, sending dogoos careening to the ground and tulips scrambling out of the underbush.
"Homerun!" shouted Neptune as she batted one of such falling dogoos straight out of the battlefield, having wasted no time turning all the chaos he was causing into a game of baseball and golf.
"One punch!" shouted Peashy in return as a dogoo tried falling towards her face. All it got for its effort was being a splat on her gloves. She felt a little bit better, a little more confident with each foe dispatched.
One dogoo did get through, however, and she stumbled back, reeling from the impact as she held her jaw. She recently read a quote that everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face, and feeling the shock for real was… something else. At least her instinctive fighting wasn't fake?
Thankfully, the power of friendship got her covered by assuming its true form: Backup.
That is to say, Neptune used one of her ballistic monsters to re-enact the time-honoured practice of hitting a motherfucker with another motherfucker.
"Aaaand she's on a rampage, ladies and gentlemen!" cheered Neptune, who only knew shame by reputation.
Still, Ace had to admit, her cheer was infectious, and the girl herself grew on you. Much like a fungus.
Shaking her head and smiling at Neptune as she recovered from the hit, the brawler rejoined the fight, this time with more vigor and a better care for her defense. The last thing the unfortunate critters would hear was a cry of "Oraoraoraoraora!" before their worlds went dark.
It wasn't much longer before their immediate area was finally clear, the trio liberally splattered with blue jelly and slime with a side of sap that seemed to take perverse joy in all but performing the fusion dance with their hair and clothes. It was wet, mushy and thoroughly miserable, but at least they didn't sport anything worse than a light bruise.
Still, it marked the tone for their little excursion. It was a continuous slog of encounters every other minute, with any sort of gathering requiring a thorough sweep of the immediate area under pain of being bum-rushed by a horde of the tiny terrors, who took to a party member's distraction and stillness like sharks to blood.
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Amidst the upbeat music, there were a great deal of chortles and snickers as the trio made their triumphant return to the Guild, dripping the unholy mix of gelatine and sap they may as well have been dunked in, their boots squeaking and squelching with every step.
"First time?" asked the counter lady, not unkindly. Their sorry sight as they handed in their ID cards was answer enough, getting an apologetic grimace off of her as she scanned them and wired over the credits they'd sacrificed their dignity for, the money counter on the cards blurring as it ticked up from the flat zero to something less miserable, "It is a bit of a rite of passage for us in the Planeptune branch. Helps weed out anyone not cut for this line of work, less casualties that way."
Anything else she may have wanted to say was cut off by the roaring cheer from the crowd of adventurers, who were all too eager to shower them in pats to the back and slung arms around their shoulders as they welcomed them to the family, not caring in the slightest about the disgusting mess they were plastered in. They'd gotten their first reward, making them official adventurers, the rowdy bunch wouldn't let that pass without proper celebration, not on their watch.
For the smiling Peashy, the slime sticking to her was still icky and such, but it beat getting actually hurt. And while it was unexpected, it also felt nice to receive a show of support from fellow questers. Talk about unwittingly being in an initiation rite. At least it was something reasonable, not the violent (and deadly) fraternity hazing she heard about in the news.
There was also something amusing to her about the Guild members welcoming their own CPU into their ranks. Neptune looked to be enjoying it, though. The ginger-haired girl wondered if it meant extra Shares for the purplette. Most likely.
Meanwhile, some pudding (and other food and drink) and a shower would be much appreciated.
Thankfully, the Guild more than provided, doubling as it did as a fully fledged inn, homelessness rates among adventurers being what they were.
After a full day of nothing but ration bars with about as much flavour as the average harem protag, free food and drink worth the name was manna from the heavens. Ace had been quite happy to find that new body or not, his snake impression remained intact, packing away what must've been half his weight in food on a single sitting and leaving a groaning Neptune in the dust as she tried and failed to prove her shounen protag appetite chops.
Likewise, the spartan room that wouldn't be out of place in a military barrack felt like a presidential suite through the lens of exhaustion and slime. The competition for who got first rights to the shower had been a fierce and bloody affair. Which came to mean that Peashy had gotten to enjoy a long shower, enjoying the cleanliness, her new curves, and her definitely Peashy-like appearance in the mirror, while Ace and Neptune were too busy D-D-DUELLING to notice.
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Their morning was a bit of a scramble. That is to say, it was three headless chickens running around trying to tidy up their unholy mess of a room and pack their shit in the twenty minutes they had between waking up near noon and the deadline for getting booted out of the room and charged extra for the cleanup.
All new adventurers got a free night of food and board, but that was it. The Guild wasn't a charity.
Still, against all odds, they succeeded, grabbing another double armful of bottom-tier quests on the way out.
Their first stop? The gear shop all their seniors had pointed them to and vouched for last night.
"Ah, welcome," the shopkeep greeted them.
There were many pieces of equipment on the shelves, mostly weapons such as swords and spears, and stylish accessories such as armlets and bangles. Helpful labels advertised their effects, magical in nature, such as a degree of protection from physical attacks, or having slightly faster movements. Various enchantments were on offer, some for combat, some for utility… and there was one that immediately got their attention. Hanging nearby was a number of differently colored Bracelets of Evercleansing, which, according to a sign, passively repelled dirt, grime and the like from the wearer. Even the name was fitting, reminding Peashy of a certain Body Mod perk.
A flashback to yesterday's excursion later, and all three of them rushed to the shopkeep's counter with one such bracelet each. Peashy took a yellow one, Neptune naturally got purple, and Ace opted for blue. However, they also turned out to be pricey, such that most of their budding budget was nipped, or rather, nepped. There was barely room for the purplette to purchase a second-hand tachi, only slightly sharper than the side of a coin, but still an upgrade from the glorified stick she'd been stuck with.
Well worth the cost, but it left them rushing to the forest to complete their batch of quests before the sun went out. The ambushes were gruelling enough in broad daylight, thank you very much.
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"Ya!" A shout rang out as another boxing critter bit the dust. A bang remotely removed a horse-bird hybrid from the threat picture, while an unlucky yellow tulip found itself bisected from bud to stem. "Chest buster!"
Something the trio worked out over time was a gathering pattern of sorts. As the resident marksman, Ace was the sentry, keeping watch. Peashy, meanwhile, did the actual gathering, remembering what they were told regarding where and how to retrieve the items. At the moment, she was picking out the healthier petals from one of the fallen flowers. As for Neptune, she was rather busy prowling about, not lacking for energy to burn.
"Come on, daylight's a-burning!" The purplette said.
"We can do that if you could help me…" The ginger replied in turn.
Neptune suddenly found herself deeply interested in the nearest tree, her silence answer enough.
Not that it stopped her from pouting and resuming her griping within the minute, "Booo- Mph!"
Only to be cut off by Ace taking the most expedient route to shutting her trap. The munchkin twisted around, intent on giving the man a piece of her mind only to stop cold at the look he was sporting.
He was terrified.
She had barely processed the fact before she felt the ground vibrating under her feet. Uh oh.
Stealth segments and escape sequences, she hated them both.
Still, it beat getting punked by a level one hundred Scrub Stomper 9000, so she followed Ace's lead in sneaking out of the little clearing and grabbing the unsuspecting Peashy along the way.
As the brawler was rather focused on her current work, it was by complete surprise when she suddenly felt someone grab her. With an "Eep", she moved to smack the one potentially kidnapping her, only to stop as she saw her two companions with a finger on their lips and terror in their eyes. Now she felt what they were feeling, a minor earthquake, the snapping of twigs and ruffling of wings, and that set her on edge. Her blue eyes had a questioning, yet nervous look, hesitant to speak out. Whatever was behind such a commotion couldn't be good.
The whole party now on the same page, they got to work on tiptoeing back into the treeline and hiding as deep into the underbrush as humanly possible, the steadily growing vibrations and approaching sounds making it easier said than done, with how jittery it was leaving them.
Ace considered prayer for all of a second, before remembering the local deity was right by his side trying to fuse herself with the bottom of the ditch they'd thrown themselves into, while the other three were more likely to take a shot at Neptune than help them at this point in the storyline. Joy.
Peashy, meanwhile, was already silently praying, for their success in their current stealth checks, and for getting through what was to come. It wasn't to Neptune, but it was also for her.
At least until a solid wall of wind flattened and uprooted a long trench of forest between the by now all too close commotion and them, only the ditch they holed themselves up in saving them from the attack as it barreled right on past, leaving them buried in torn up underbrush and with ringing ears but otherwise fine. For a given value of fine, given how they'd just about shat out their hearts.
Peashy was shaky as the storm passed over them. The music didn't help the tone either. She wasn't a fan of jump scares, and now it felt like a buildup to one.
Ace almost wished his headset hadn't protected his ears. He could hear the beast of a monster that had huffed and puffed and yeeted a new clearing into the forest walk towards them. He was fairly sure the only thing keeping him vaguely together was all the training that'd been crammed into his skull, which left him with enough brainpower to notice just how unsteady those steps were, full of stumbles and swaying.
That gave him some hope, that the monster was too wounded to hunt them down even if it sniffed them out.
Hope that was ruthlessly dashed when one of those very same stumbles brought a massive paw crashing through the toppled trees and just a few inches away from leaving Neptune minus a leg with the colossal blades jutting out from where sensible claws ought to be.
There was a pained, absolutely livid howl as the monster ripped its wounded leg out of the ditch, now in even worse shape courtesy of all the stake sized splinters embedded in it.
This also had the unfortunate side-effect of ripping their cover right off, leaving them on their backs staring at the blood-shot eyes of a very irate wolf the size of a bus. Well, eye, singular, the other one just a bloody ruin of a socket where whatever the monster had tussled with had gouged it out alongside a not inconsiderable chunk of its scalp and its right ear.
Right up until that remaining eye burst like a rotten egg as a plasma gel slug carved right through it and the brow above it in a shower of blood and bone shards.
"RUN!"
A/N: Have a little something from @Nihilo and me, with @dingbat779 as our beta. Let's just say that our muses were inspired for an isekai adventure.
The sun was shining, the clouds were floating, the birds were singing, and to all appearances, it was a fine day. Probably not as much to three figures, however, as they were currently sandwiched in between a cushiony thing called air resistance and an accelerator known as gravity.
Among all the things that could happen, falling from the sky was what the young woman least expected, and it all started with a portal, outlined in yellow, right below her feet. What was even worse was that she was going down the stairs at the time.
She couldn't even hear her own voice, her ears being buffeted by the wind, as she found herself skydiving in open air, with no ground to stand on. It felt even worse than what she imagined, that sudden sensation of falling, of dropping, of that future impact with the ground.
A glance to her side, however, showed a purplette in a parka dress that she'd recognize from fiction anywhere, as well as some guy in tactical gear who wouldn't look out of place in Metal Gear. There was just a teensy little issue though. They were way too close, like, less than six feet apart, and she couldn't move away. What about social distancing?! She was at home before all this; she didn't even have a mask on!
Her internal screaming, however, was swiftly drowned out by the far louder external screaming of the man by her side, whose own thoughts on the situation he left exceedingly clear in no less than three languages, "-HITSHITSHITSHIT, M'HA CAGO EN DEU, LA CREU I EL FUSTER QUE LA FEU, HIJO DE LA GRANDISIMA PUTA, A QUIN MALPARIT SE LI ACUDEIX-"
Still, for all that he was busy showing off his admittedly impressive lung capacity, his hands were moving awfully steady, stashing away the shield and hammer… somewhere in his backpack. Look, when an article of clothing literally slurps up a solid five plus kilos of steel like an hyperactive blonde inhales ramen, you nod and move right on. Communal pity party of logic and all good sense off in the corner aside, the fact of the matter was that the man was now holding a couple of ropes tipped by clip hooks.
And, wonder of wonders, he had deigned interrupting his commendable attempt at dying the air black and blue to speak some sense, although he was still hollering to be heard over the wind, "You two grab these and pull yourselves closer! I got a parachute and I'd rather not have two human hamburgers on my conscience!"
And that was a quick reminder to the woman that there were more immediate concerns, like the ground swiftly rising up to meet her. Somehow, the only one who had a landing strategy available was the Snake-like guy with colorful language and impressively loud voice. Nodding, she grabbed onto the rope and reeled herself in. Beside her, she could see a certain protagonist doing the same, though she could also hear snippets of comments, something about derails.
"Watch out for the jank! I don't want you two dying to bit-off tongues!" was all the warning he gave before he gave one of the cords poking out from his backpack a sharp pull, the parachute unfolding with a fwoosh a fraction of a second before they were jarred by the sudden switch from terminal velocity to survivable clip.
It felt like an application of full brakes, one that was surely felt by the woman. Still, the sense of freefall was replaced by that of gliding, albeit more of gentle falling than going anywhere. A glance downwards, however, showed that the ground was covered by green forest, and there was little space for clearings.
-------------------------------
The search for a landing spot had been less than successful, as the mouthful of leaves the man was spitting out could attest to. At least his backpack was able to slurp the parachute back in with no regard whatsoever for all the branches tangling it up, leaving all three standing on an awfully convenient branch, what with it being plenty thick and sturdy enough to hold the lot of them without issue.
Downside? Big branch meant big tree. The ground was still far away enough just hopping off all but guaranteed some broken legs, but not far enough that he could deploy the parachute again.
More material for that one corner of his mind to keep on screaming and crying on about, the rest of him was busy tying some rope to where the branch merged with the trunk and rappelling down the sequoia wannabe as if he'd done it a thousand times, when he was quite sure he was just a slob of a biotech major who only knew exercise by reputation, thank you very much.
He shook his head. Breakdown later, get to safety now. Now, to get the girls he'd… admittedly forgotten about for a second there, what with all the internal screaming… anyhow, to get them down from there, "Aight, either you two climb down the rope, or you just jump off and I catch you! Take your pick!"
While the woman was agonizing over her choices, neither of which she felt confident on, the purplette opted to take the plunge. "Geronimoooo…!"
He managed to catch the ballistic eggplant easily enough, muscle memory he had no right to have ensured she didn't crack her head against the plating of his vest, nor smash any of his gear, for that matter.
"Phew, there we go." he muttered as he set her down, wondering how much of her lightness was from being a slip of a girl and how much was his brand new muscles.
"How do I climb down the rope?" The other girl asked, cupping her mouth with her hands. It was something she never did in real life, and she wasn't quite a fan of freefalling again. She was sure there was a certain technique to it, one that she was unaware of. Her mouth was momentarily covered as she heard her own voice, only to smile afterwards. She finally sounded like the girl she was, and amusingly, she also sounded like a certain Gungnir wielder. On a side note, she realized she was somehow wearing yellow gloves, despite not doing so before all this. They were a tad heavier than she thought, too.
He managed to restrain himself from replying with an 'With your hands', punting his sass back to the corner. Instead, what he delivered was a crash course on rappelling ala verbal diarrhea, courtesy of him having to scramble to rack the mess of information carelessly dumped on his poor brainmeats. Still, it got the point across.
"Good going, skipping on the actual exposition." piped in the purple head whose identity he was still halfway in denial about, "The readers aren't here for a lesson on rappelling ripped off Wikipedia."
...Speaking of denial.
To the other girl, it felt as if the guy went 'yadda yadda yadda', yet was fully understood anyway. So that was how to do the abseiling thing. She put words into action, starting with wrapping the rope around herself in a certain way, holding onto it, and walking down the trunk…
She was internally screaming as she descended. It would be so much easier if she had chakra or something. Still it was at least partly offset by the different, yet welcoming feeling and appearance her body had. She was finally physically a girl, her body fixed. She also noted that her hair was longer now, and a nice orange in hue.
…
"And there you go too," the man muttered, again, as he helped the lass out of the rope his backpack was all too happy to slurp right up, once again ignoring trifles such as common sense and logic, alongside his knotwork. "Now, le-"
And that's about when a ballistic dog-faced pile of blue gelatin tried to tackle his head off.
Instead, it got to give the nearby foliages a coat of blue paint as yet more reflexes he hadn't signed up for kicked in and saw him pulling out a handgun from god knew where and double tap the unfortunate monster.
He was done with today.
He took a bracing sigh, his free hand rubbing at the bridge of his nose to try and bunt the migraine he was building up to, "So, as I was sa-" his arm snapped out, the gun barking out a quartet of shots and the forest sporting a pair of new splotches of blue.
He turned his head to the thick foliage that was so intent on throwing random encounters at him, his tone about as murderous as he was feeling, "Interrupt me again and I burn this whole forest down, I am having a godawful day and some therapeutic pyromania sounds fucking heavenly right about now."
The underbrush rustled as seemingly every monster in earshot made the wise decision of bravely running away.
Good.
"As I was saying..." he let it hang for a moment, making sure he wouldn't be interrupted a third time, "We ought to get moving, I think I saw some skyscrapers off in the distance thataway while we were on the air."
The female with sensible hair colour flinched at the gunshots and the scary-sounding threat, even though those were directed at the very real dogoos nearby. It was also then that she realized she had inadvertently taken a loose stance, her left foot forward, and her gloved hands balled into fists and positioned to guard her head. Where did that come from? She heard of the basics, but was no practitioner herself, yet it felt almost natural to do now. Better than being helpless, though.
She made herself relax a bit and hugged herself as the slimy threats ran off. "Yep." Another thing she noticed is that her outfit was different. Colored in yellow and black, the jacket, dress and all reminded her of a bumblebee. Combined with her ginger hair and her newfound instinct, she was reminded of a certain personification of the old PC Engine, albeit aged up. Even her own voice sounded the part.
"So, how'd you two end up in the sky?" She asked her newfound companions as they walked, albeit also stumbling on her part as she acclimated to a different sense of weight. A certain familiar music was in the background, and it was pleasant to hear. The purplette, meanwhile, was very much a dead ringer for a certain goddess from Planeptune, and the sight of her at freefall brought to mind the beginning of a certain first Rebirth.
"Tumbled out of bed into a portal, it went downhill from there." he grumbled, his free hand back to massaging the bridge of his nose, while the one holding the gun had lowered to point at the ground and had its finger firmly off the trigger.
The purple-headed girl's face told them she'd tried to rack her brain for the answer and instead run headfirst into a brick wall, with about as big a concussion as one could expect. A light prod to the side of her head snapped her out of it just fine, at least. He dutifully ignored the mutinous mutters about enforced protagonist amnesia and lazy writing.
"I was going downstairs when suddenly, portal." For the other girl, currently waving her arms to balance herself, she had a confused expression at the goddess. Why couldn't the latter remember, when she didn't hit her head this time? It didn't sound good when it was implied it was merely forced on her. "Any idea where those came from?"
"The portals? None whatsoever," he replied with a shake of his head, "I barely even got a glimpse of mine, what with waking up only half a second before I fell through." He paused, a thought hitting as he pulled out a pair of binoculars and scanned the stretch of sky they'd fallen from. At least as much as could be done through the canopy. Still, the glowing rings would've stood out against the backdrop something fierce, "Aaaaand nope, no sight of them up there. Must've closed after us." he grumbled as he stashed the piece of gear back into his possibly eldritch bag, resuming his walk.
The talking and the stashing reminded the still-wobbly Peashy-lookalike of something that she should have recalled sooner. "...Do any of you have extra face masks?"
The shortest of the three wasted no time turning her pockets inside out, slumping slightly at her grand inventory of three pieces of linen and a spare button, "No starting gear DLC for me, huh?"
The man, meanwhile, was giving a critical eye to the full-face gas mask his backpack had spat out at him. Further prodding of the possibly sentient bag only produced a couple of spare filters for the thing. He sighed, stashing them back, "Just the one, it looks like. You can have it, I've been shut in for well over a month without a single trip outside, so I ought to be clear myself." Nevermind how he'd been shoved into the body of a Rhodes Island operator going by the rook insignias everywhere on his gear. In particular, the designated gacha game prologue casualty, Ace, if the mug he'd seen reflected on his gun was anything to go by. Filled him with confidence, it did.
"Thanks." The ginger-haired woman was also pretty much confined at home, but it would be better safe than sorry, though not for herself, but for others. Wearing the wide-visored thing did remind her of the news though, where a senator wore a gas mask during a meeting for sarcasm purposes. "Actually, what are your names?" She continued, having decided on going by who she looked like. "I'm Peashy."
"Ace," he replied easily, the package deal he'd been suckered into apparently including having that feel as natural as his real name. Nevermind it being supposed to just be the character's callsign as per the overwhelming majority of operators. Bah.
The violette, meanwhile, raised a finger towards the sky and grinned. It even came with sparkles. "And I'm the protag of protags, Neptune!"
The man slumped, so much for that denial. Welcome to the Neptunia series, have fun with your isekai adventure and try not to think too hard on how you may just be the figment of some bored author's imagination with no true free will to speak of. Yey.
Good thing Neptune still remembered her name, and it was also a confirmation of Peashy being in one of her favorite series. It also brought to mind something though. Which Gamindustri were they in? From the looks of things, it was the Superdimension, but she could be mistaken. Where was Compa?
"Nice to meet you Ace, Neptuna," she said. Normally she'd offer her hand, but considering the circumstances, that was not the best idea.
-------------------------------
It was one thing for Peashy, who was more acclimated to her body now, to see the futuristic city on a screen. It was another, a wonder on the eyes which no longer needed glasses, to see the aforementioned post-modern metropolis for real, all behind a stylized entrance arch that read 'Welcome to Planeptune', and a shift in the music to something calmer. She kinda looked out of place, however, seeing that people were walking close together and not wearing any masks. It may be Gamindustri, a different world, but it was also a different norm from what she had to adjust to these days. "So, where to first?" She inquired from her companions. "I'm thinking, the Guild, or maybe somewhere to stay."
"Guild." was Ace's immediate answer, "If by the time the sun's out we haven't made enough cash to get a room somewhere, we can always camp in a park or alleyway, not much in the way of abandoned buildings to squat in here." He scratched his beard, humming in thought, "We should also see about getting a checkup at some clinic or other, figure out if we got corona and if so get it cured with all this magic and sci-fi bullshit flying around. I'd rather not have to waste those fancy filters and do all this tiptoeing around."
"Yeesh, talk about nitty-gritty." groused Neptune in the background, "Where's my cushy JRPG intro?"
Not the most glamorous of stuff, but what could they do? "Clinic sounds best," the yellow one replied, the idea reminding her of a certain ex-nurse-in-training, "How about you, Neptuna?"
"Wha-! Oh!" she visibly startled, snapped out of her grumbling, "Yeah, yeah, let's get that plot-mandated limping out of the way. Gotta advance the plot a bit before they let you go hog-wild with the open world and side-quests, yeah?"
"Yep. Gotta grind levels and credits too," the other girl added, "And help Histy, and befriend allies and goddesses..."
"Oi! No spoilers!"
------------------------------------------------------------
As he'd halfway expected, they got a clean bill of health. He had to agree with Neptune that it was an all but obligatory part of the isekai package, but it paid to be sure.
Best part: It hadn't cost them a single credit.
Ah, anime women in sci-fi fetish wear bless free healthcare.
After that, it had been a quick trip to the Guild to get registered --also free, eat your heart out Konosuba-- and grab a double armload of bottom-tier quests on the forest to the east of the city. Gathering ones for every common resource in the area, and culling ones to get paid for all the random encounters they would have to wade through anyways. Nothing like hitting multiple boxbirds with one blast.
In the here and now, they were on the outskirts of Planeptune, staring at the treeline.
Ace sighed, bracing himself for what he expected to be a Zubat marathon, "Well, time to terrorise th-"
Neptune had plans of her own, raising her wooden sword-in-the-garbage that proclaimed her God-Queen of Planeptune skywards as she charged, "LEEEEERRRRRRROOOO-"
His hand snapped out like a viper, hooking on Neptune's hoodie with a vice grip, leaving her to cough and putter as her charge had her chokeslammed with her collar. This girl was going to be the death of him, "Tanks first." That and his pants-on-head retarded decision to play the tank. Sure, it made sense from a logical standpoint given his build and gear, but he'd much rather not be first in line to get his face eaten off. Him and his bleeding heart, he swore to fuck.
"Awww." pouted the suicidal little munchkin, but ultimately bowed to the laws of gamer protocol.
"Don't worry," Peashy gave the goddess a pat on the shoulder, "We'll DPS while he aggro's." There was something amusing about applying gaming terminology to very real quests, and she was less inclined to taking hits anyway.
"Hey, at least you two won't be the ones covered head-to-toe in slime and sap at the end of the day." he offered as consolation as he heaved up his shield and brought up his pistol, starting to march into the forest following the goatrail the pics they'd been provided pointed them to.
"Thanks." For the yellow fighter's part, she had her gloved hands prepared to guard herself. Something she found in her surprisingly deep pockets was a pair of yellow brass knuckles, and she wore them accordingly. If Iffy could get away with entire katars, then hers wouldn't be a big deal either.
True to form, they weren't three steps in when the music shifted to a more energetic piece, and the first batch of pug-faced sludges and ambulatory flowers decided to accost them, getting instantly ventilated. Issue was…
"GAH! What's this encounter design?!" Neptune yelped as she batted away the dogoo who'd tried to get the literal drop on her from the branches, while they'd been focused on the group of monsters at the front.
The dopey-faced bags of EXP had gotten the memo on flanking and ambush tactics. It was the party that was hit by a Symbol Attack.
"I didn't know they were smart!" The batted dogoo was actually flying towards Peashy, which she proceeded to throw a jab and a straight at. She felt newfound instincts guiding her limbs as the blue slime was flung towards a tree trunk, making a juicy splat on impact.
"We got Dark Souls-style enemy placement, fucking typical." Ace grumbled, shifting mental gears to full CONSTANT VIGILANCE as he finished blasting the sneaky little shit of a tulip he'd pinned under his shield.
He was sure the forest wouldn't appreciate all the shot off branches and uprooted underbush courtesy of judicious ambush checks, but that's what it got for enabling this sneeki breeki fuckery.
He allowed himself a smile as he drank in the terrified yelps and barks of the little demons as he smoked them out from their ambush spots, sending dogoos careening to the ground and tulips scrambling out of the underbush.
"Homerun!" shouted Neptune as she batted one of such falling dogoos straight out of the battlefield, having wasted no time turning all the chaos he was causing into a game of baseball and golf.
"One punch!" shouted Peashy in return as a dogoo tried falling towards her face. All it got for its effort was being a splat on her gloves. She felt a little bit better, a little more confident with each foe dispatched.
One dogoo did get through, however, and she stumbled back, reeling from the impact as she held her jaw. She recently read a quote that everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face, and feeling the shock for real was… something else. At least her instinctive fighting wasn't fake?
Thankfully, the power of friendship got her covered by assuming its true form: Backup.
That is to say, Neptune used one of her ballistic monsters to re-enact the time-honoured practice of hitting a motherfucker with another motherfucker.
"Aaaand she's on a rampage, ladies and gentlemen!" cheered Neptune, who only knew shame by reputation.
Still, Ace had to admit, her cheer was infectious, and the girl herself grew on you. Much like a fungus.
Shaking her head and smiling at Neptune as she recovered from the hit, the brawler rejoined the fight, this time with more vigor and a better care for her defense. The last thing the unfortunate critters would hear was a cry of "Oraoraoraoraora!" before their worlds went dark.
It wasn't much longer before their immediate area was finally clear, the trio liberally splattered with blue jelly and slime with a side of sap that seemed to take perverse joy in all but performing the fusion dance with their hair and clothes. It was wet, mushy and thoroughly miserable, but at least they didn't sport anything worse than a light bruise.
Still, it marked the tone for their little excursion. It was a continuous slog of encounters every other minute, with any sort of gathering requiring a thorough sweep of the immediate area under pain of being bum-rushed by a horde of the tiny terrors, who took to a party member's distraction and stillness like sharks to blood.
------------------------------------
Amidst the upbeat music, there were a great deal of chortles and snickers as the trio made their triumphant return to the Guild, dripping the unholy mix of gelatine and sap they may as well have been dunked in, their boots squeaking and squelching with every step.
"First time?" asked the counter lady, not unkindly. Their sorry sight as they handed in their ID cards was answer enough, getting an apologetic grimace off of her as she scanned them and wired over the credits they'd sacrificed their dignity for, the money counter on the cards blurring as it ticked up from the flat zero to something less miserable, "It is a bit of a rite of passage for us in the Planeptune branch. Helps weed out anyone not cut for this line of work, less casualties that way."
Anything else she may have wanted to say was cut off by the roaring cheer from the crowd of adventurers, who were all too eager to shower them in pats to the back and slung arms around their shoulders as they welcomed them to the family, not caring in the slightest about the disgusting mess they were plastered in. They'd gotten their first reward, making them official adventurers, the rowdy bunch wouldn't let that pass without proper celebration, not on their watch.
For the smiling Peashy, the slime sticking to her was still icky and such, but it beat getting actually hurt. And while it was unexpected, it also felt nice to receive a show of support from fellow questers. Talk about unwittingly being in an initiation rite. At least it was something reasonable, not the violent (and deadly) fraternity hazing she heard about in the news.
There was also something amusing to her about the Guild members welcoming their own CPU into their ranks. Neptune looked to be enjoying it, though. The ginger-haired girl wondered if it meant extra Shares for the purplette. Most likely.
Meanwhile, some pudding (and other food and drink) and a shower would be much appreciated.
Thankfully, the Guild more than provided, doubling as it did as a fully fledged inn, homelessness rates among adventurers being what they were.
After a full day of nothing but ration bars with about as much flavour as the average harem protag, free food and drink worth the name was manna from the heavens. Ace had been quite happy to find that new body or not, his snake impression remained intact, packing away what must've been half his weight in food on a single sitting and leaving a groaning Neptune in the dust as she tried and failed to prove her shounen protag appetite chops.
Likewise, the spartan room that wouldn't be out of place in a military barrack felt like a presidential suite through the lens of exhaustion and slime. The competition for who got first rights to the shower had been a fierce and bloody affair. Which came to mean that Peashy had gotten to enjoy a long shower, enjoying the cleanliness, her new curves, and her definitely Peashy-like appearance in the mirror, while Ace and Neptune were too busy D-D-DUELLING to notice.
-------------------------------------
Their morning was a bit of a scramble. That is to say, it was three headless chickens running around trying to tidy up their unholy mess of a room and pack their shit in the twenty minutes they had between waking up near noon and the deadline for getting booted out of the room and charged extra for the cleanup.
All new adventurers got a free night of food and board, but that was it. The Guild wasn't a charity.
Still, against all odds, they succeeded, grabbing another double armful of bottom-tier quests on the way out.
Their first stop? The gear shop all their seniors had pointed them to and vouched for last night.
"Ah, welcome," the shopkeep greeted them.
There were many pieces of equipment on the shelves, mostly weapons such as swords and spears, and stylish accessories such as armlets and bangles. Helpful labels advertised their effects, magical in nature, such as a degree of protection from physical attacks, or having slightly faster movements. Various enchantments were on offer, some for combat, some for utility… and there was one that immediately got their attention. Hanging nearby was a number of differently colored Bracelets of Evercleansing, which, according to a sign, passively repelled dirt, grime and the like from the wearer. Even the name was fitting, reminding Peashy of a certain Body Mod perk.
A flashback to yesterday's excursion later, and all three of them rushed to the shopkeep's counter with one such bracelet each. Peashy took a yellow one, Neptune naturally got purple, and Ace opted for blue. However, they also turned out to be pricey, such that most of their budding budget was nipped, or rather, nepped. There was barely room for the purplette to purchase a second-hand tachi, only slightly sharper than the side of a coin, but still an upgrade from the glorified stick she'd been stuck with.
Well worth the cost, but it left them rushing to the forest to complete their batch of quests before the sun went out. The ambushes were gruelling enough in broad daylight, thank you very much.
-----------------------------------------------------
"Ya!" A shout rang out as another boxing critter bit the dust. A bang remotely removed a horse-bird hybrid from the threat picture, while an unlucky yellow tulip found itself bisected from bud to stem. "Chest buster!"
Something the trio worked out over time was a gathering pattern of sorts. As the resident marksman, Ace was the sentry, keeping watch. Peashy, meanwhile, did the actual gathering, remembering what they were told regarding where and how to retrieve the items. At the moment, she was picking out the healthier petals from one of the fallen flowers. As for Neptune, she was rather busy prowling about, not lacking for energy to burn.
"Come on, daylight's a-burning!" The purplette said.
"We can do that if you could help me…" The ginger replied in turn.
Neptune suddenly found herself deeply interested in the nearest tree, her silence answer enough.
Not that it stopped her from pouting and resuming her griping within the minute, "Booo- Mph!"
Only to be cut off by Ace taking the most expedient route to shutting her trap. The munchkin twisted around, intent on giving the man a piece of her mind only to stop cold at the look he was sporting.
He was terrified.
She had barely processed the fact before she felt the ground vibrating under her feet. Uh oh.
Stealth segments and escape sequences, she hated them both.
Still, it beat getting punked by a level one hundred Scrub Stomper 9000, so she followed Ace's lead in sneaking out of the little clearing and grabbing the unsuspecting Peashy along the way.
As the brawler was rather focused on her current work, it was by complete surprise when she suddenly felt someone grab her. With an "Eep", she moved to smack the one potentially kidnapping her, only to stop as she saw her two companions with a finger on their lips and terror in their eyes. Now she felt what they were feeling, a minor earthquake, the snapping of twigs and ruffling of wings, and that set her on edge. Her blue eyes had a questioning, yet nervous look, hesitant to speak out. Whatever was behind such a commotion couldn't be good.
The whole party now on the same page, they got to work on tiptoeing back into the treeline and hiding as deep into the underbrush as humanly possible, the steadily growing vibrations and approaching sounds making it easier said than done, with how jittery it was leaving them.
Ace considered prayer for all of a second, before remembering the local deity was right by his side trying to fuse herself with the bottom of the ditch they'd thrown themselves into, while the other three were more likely to take a shot at Neptune than help them at this point in the storyline. Joy.
Peashy, meanwhile, was already silently praying, for their success in their current stealth checks, and for getting through what was to come. It wasn't to Neptune, but it was also for her.
At least until a solid wall of wind flattened and uprooted a long trench of forest between the by now all too close commotion and them, only the ditch they holed themselves up in saving them from the attack as it barreled right on past, leaving them buried in torn up underbrush and with ringing ears but otherwise fine. For a given value of fine, given how they'd just about shat out their hearts.
Peashy was shaky as the storm passed over them. The music didn't help the tone either. She wasn't a fan of jump scares, and now it felt like a buildup to one.
Ace almost wished his headset hadn't protected his ears. He could hear the beast of a monster that had huffed and puffed and yeeted a new clearing into the forest walk towards them. He was fairly sure the only thing keeping him vaguely together was all the training that'd been crammed into his skull, which left him with enough brainpower to notice just how unsteady those steps were, full of stumbles and swaying.
That gave him some hope, that the monster was too wounded to hunt them down even if it sniffed them out.
Hope that was ruthlessly dashed when one of those very same stumbles brought a massive paw crashing through the toppled trees and just a few inches away from leaving Neptune minus a leg with the colossal blades jutting out from where sensible claws ought to be.
There was a pained, absolutely livid howl as the monster ripped its wounded leg out of the ditch, now in even worse shape courtesy of all the stake sized splinters embedded in it.
This also had the unfortunate side-effect of ripping their cover right off, leaving them on their backs staring at the blood-shot eyes of a very irate wolf the size of a bus. Well, eye, singular, the other one just a bloody ruin of a socket where whatever the monster had tussled with had gouged it out alongside a not inconsiderable chunk of its scalp and its right ear.
Right up until that remaining eye burst like a rotten egg as a plasma gel slug carved right through it and the brow above it in a shower of blood and bone shards.
"RUN!"
A/N: Have a little something from @Nihilo and me, with @dingbat779 as our beta. Let's just say that our muses were inspired for an isekai adventure.
ForgottonFuture
Sleepy Queen of Destruction
- Location
- The Future.
- Pronouns
- She/her
*snickers* Well this is definitely a hilarious read. Can't wait to see where you two go with this.
- Location
- PA
There will be fire, cordite, and pudding. Let the Neppening begin!
Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
Others shy from the trash. Shun it.
Foolishness.
But yeah, I think it is mostly due to Neptunia fics in general being a bit thin on the ground. And what is there is mostly just people who got fed up with the cockteasing and decided to take matters into their own hands.
- Location
- PA
There are quite a number of things the fans have 'taken into their own hands.'
...I'll see myself out.
- Location
- Lost to the Depths of the Deep Web
*Insert OH MY.gif*
Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
Fics have quite a horrible mortality rate, this is known.
Chapter 2: Sky-Fall
UbeOne
Daydreaming CPU
- Location
- Philippines
- Pronouns
- She/Her
Chapter 2
It was a flurry of notes and a howl across the treetops as the running commenced. For Peashy, it was a different kind of adrenaline, not excitement nor a rush, but this time, out of sheer terror for her life and that of her teammates. Even while the beast was injured, it was still above their league, capable of laying them low, and not in a pleasant manner. Where was the HDD when it was needed? She didn't know if Neptune's was unlocked, and she didn't know if she had one of her own. She didn't look like the Ultradimension Peashy, after all. If anything, she could be like Big Neptune, an older, human counterpart from another dimension.
They'd jumped into the treeline, hoping the obstacles would give the monster pause.
Unfortunately, it was too enraged to care, simply barreling through the trees to get at them, well past the point of feeling pain.
Cooler heads would draw out a plan to exploit this, draw it into a trap, or perhaps flank it in a pincer move to cripple one of its legs for good.
Sadly, rational thought was in very short supply when one was chased by a wolf the size of a truck, with swords for fangs and claws. Nevermind how sorry its state, the damn thing could still snap them like twigs if it got in melee range. The only reason they were still alive was that it'd expended the last of its magic juice on that wind attack earlier.
"Can you shoot it while we're running?!" Peashy's voice could be heard over the commotion. Her eyes quickly scanned the area, looking for where they could make sudden turns and try to throw off the chase.
"Would only piss it off and slow myself do-!" was his aborted reply, lunging forward to snag Neptune off her feet and into a dive, narrowly avoiding the wolf's pounce, the two scrambling to their feet to regain distance before the monster could recover and resume its chase.
The other girl quickly helped them up, then resumed fleeing with them. In the distance was a big tree with a wide, thick trunk, and that gave her a sudden mental lightbulb. "There! Make it ram that!" She pointed. The idea was to run at the tree, then make a sudden turn right in front of it, leaving the zealous pursuer to hit it.
In lieu of answering, Ace cracked off a burst of shots over his shoulder, most bouncing off of the skull or merely nicking the remaining ear, but going off the flinch the monster gave and the furious howl that followed, they did its job deafening it and pissing it right off.
He still almost lost an arm as he dove to the side, keeping on rolling in the ground to get away from the blind charge he was rewarded with. Still, the deafening wet crack of the monster's snout and partly exposed skull against the trunk was music to his ears, while the solid thump of its stunned body crumpling on the ground was the angels from on high singing him an ode.
Now, to make sure the fucker didn't get back up, "Nep, Pea, nail its legs!"
Meanwhile, his handgun had unfinished business with that eye socket.
"Finally!" The fighter sported a wolfish grin. It was a chance to turn the tables on the fiendish predator. Brass-knuckled fists fell upon the wolf's quadriceps with a vengeance. However, the fur, she discovered, might as well be living steel, so she switched to hitting the monster's wounds. Repeatedly. Interestingly enough, a yellow glow began coating her hands with warm energy. She felt her punches pushing through as it did. "Atatatatatata!"
Neptune, for her part, was venting her hate of quick time events in her own unique way, her sword jammed as deep as it'd go into a joint and producing a godawful racket as she rolled and twisted the blade, the bones grinding against each other and the metal, "Row! Row! Fight the power!"
The wolf was less than appreciative of their idea of osteopathy, growling as it tried to shake them off and get back to its feet. Unfortunately for it, its wounds and concussion were having none of it, leaving it to spasm on the floor.
Still, it was far from safe. One wrong twitch and the two girls would end up impaled on one of the bladed claws or crushed under its bulk if they reacted a second too late. Seeming to realise that through the haze of its rattled brain, it made to roll over, intent on crushing the infuriating little gnats nipping at its heels.
Or it would have if Ace hadn't chosen that moment to dump six shots on its eye socket from the opposite side.
Then another twelve when it kept on breathing.
Then a sledgehammer to the skull when his gun sputtered empty and the damn beast was still twitching.
Then another five swings until that godsforsaken skull deigned to cave in.
He couldn't feel his legs, his arms were on fire, his lungs doing their level best to self-destruct and at some point he'd fallen flat on his back if his view of the canopy was anything to go by.
He also happened to be smiling like an idiot.
"Think they'll give us a bonus?"
----------------------------------
It was an exhausted and battered trio that shuffled back to the Guild, the sun setting behind them and the music stringing gently about. They made for a sorry sight, covered in bruises and cuts, nevermind the beating their clothing had taken after so many tumbles through the forest floor diving out of the way of Fido. On the positive side, their new amulets had more than pulled their weight, not a speck of dirt or blood on them, when by all rights they should be positively plastered in the stuff.
It said something about the state of the world and their chosen line of work that they didn't get so much as a second glance from the passersby. Just some adventurers limping home after a rough mission, not even a broken bone to their names.
It actually irritated Ace on some level, that dismissal. Felt like their brush with death was being belittled. Intellectually he understood that to an outsider they just looked roughed up, no serious wounds whatsoever, for the simple reason all the damage was from getting out of the way of attacks that'd have cost them limbs at best. It still rankled all the same.
For Peashy, she was just relieved that they made it through such a battle, bruised but otherwise uninjured. It not being such a big deal was fine with her, since she wasn't the type for undue attention. There were worse scenarios anyway, and she figured that returning adventurers were a common sight around these parts.
Of course, that tune changed right quick when they submitted their ID cards' recordings to the Guild. Because whatever had made mincemeat of that wolf was still out there in the forest. Beyond the risk of an unlucky adventurer team stumbling on it unwittingly, if it kept on displacing powerful monsters like that the entire area had to be shut down. No quests, no trade, no travel, no nothing. Not with the risk of a wounded, enraged monster suddenly bursting in and slaughtering everyone.
Which was why they'd forced themselves to rush back to the Guild as fast as their tortured legs would allow, and all but collapsed at the counter.
It was a kicked anthill now, with adventurers and staff running to and fro, making frantic calls and all but climbing over one another to run out the door. There was a cordon to set up, adventurer teams to recall, emergency rescue teams to dispatch, authorities to contact and coordinate with, the whole nine yards. Talk about a prompt response to an outbreak, albeit that of invasive monsters.
As for them, they'd been helped to a nearby set of chairs and given a round of healing magic. Couldn't do much about the exhaustion, but removing full body bruising from their list of pains was very much appreciated, made them feel a bit less like death warmed over.
At least they'd gotten that bonus. Full payment for the elimination of a Risky Boss-class Fenrir, plus the reward for delivering such critical intel to the Guild as fast as they were able. Then the Guild had gone and doubled both on account of how they were fresh-faced rookies who'd gotten caught in and nearly died to something a team of veteran adventurers should've been dispatched to handle.
The thought of actually not making it made Peashy shudder.
"Hey, Neptune," Ace managed to force out through his less-than-cooperative body.
He took the death rattle from the girl as a "Yes?"
"Next time let's settle for boring." he replied with a chuckle that made his lungs and ribs consider mutiny.
Peashy leaned towards agreement with Ace. It was a bit too much excitement for the day. It also made her wonder how to be more prepared for such an occurrence.
As it turned out, Neptune had enough energy left in her to pout.
---------------------------------
There was nothing like a nice, relaxing view of the daytime sky while lounging around the deck, and playing a phone game. Yes, a deck. It had been a few weeks since the Fenrir incident, and while that forest remained quarantined, the stable questing since then had resulted in a nice set of investments for the trio, the flying ship being one of them. Yep, flying. The nations were floating landmasses, a confirmation of this Gamindustri being the Superdimension.
At this time, they were on one of the usual delivery quests, shipping supplies for the Guild between countries, or in this case, from Planeptune to Lastation. Nice and safe, right? Besides the occasional flying monster, there wasn't much issue, which suited them just fine. Well, a bit less so for Neptune.
The girl in question swung her legs under the railing, idly sending a sword beam to slice off the wing of a flying monster before she let herself fall on her back with a whine, "Bleh, so boooo- ACK!"
Bitching that was cut short by way of a dead monster bird to the face.
Neptune was barely done spitting out the worst of the feathers when another landed on her side, followed by three friends.
Then the smog clouds above thundered and they got treated to a Khornate's wet dream, blood and giblets literally raining down from the sky.
"It's the end of the world already?!" Peashy cried out in shock as she stood. Raining blood and bird chunks weren't helping her imagination, and now she needed her phone cleaned. She was in the final lap of an intense virtual race, too. At least her clothes remained fine.
The ship audibly grumbled, struts and plating creaking and groaning out her foul mood. Far more audible, however, was her captain, "-I M'HA CAGO EN S'HA PUTISSIMA MARE! A QUIN MALPARIT-"
Who needed foghorns when you had angry Catalonian screaming?
Side effects may include sci-fi goddesses in spandex lingerie dropping out of the sky.
And that, kids, was why the LS Dawi had a perfect foot-deep imprint of Black Heart's face on its deck.
The poor goddess in question flailed, taking a good few tries to dislodge her head from the little pocket it'd rammed into the plating.
And, because the universe had it out for her, she overshot and enjoyed herself a nice little ass-over-head tumble through the mess she'd made of the deck.
Concussed, exhausted, covered in gore and fresh off of huffing Lastation's best, most shady chemical-choked smog for hours on end, the goddess did the only sensible thing. That being vomiting, depowering and passing out, not necessarily in that order.
"...Please tell me you two also saw that," pleaded Ace as he felt his reality check bounce.
"Got it on camera!" crowed Neptune, holding up her phone like she was the green twink himself.
"Poor Noire," was Peashy's comment. A head-on impact did not spell good news, one that a certain purplette would easily attest to in canon. "Imagine if that happened to you, Neptuna."
"Pass." was her instant reply, instead electing to have herself some fun with the video.
Tact, thy name is Neptune.
Ace, meanwhile, was already at work hoisting the poor woman like a sack of potatoes. "I'll go hose her off and patch her up, you two clean this mess and keep an eye out for fliers. I don't want a swarm like the one she painted the deck with pounding us from behind."
Them and their fucking luck, he swore to Histoire's antediluvian loli ass.
------------------------------------------------
"Ha! Taste my blue shell!"
"Noooooo…!"
A minute later...
"No way! I call hax!"
"Hehehehehe."
The deck had been cleared and the fallen CPU had been taken care of for the time being, leaving the two women to race each other online. Hooray for free wifi!
For Peashy though, she was a tad flushed on her cheeks. The former Black Heart's dress was such a bloody mess that it was a complete write-off; they had to burn it. She needed new threads in the meantime, and Neptune's spares wouldn't fit. That left the ones in the ginger's own closet.
There was one more snag, however. Noire was still unconscious, and that meant someone had to help her into the new white and orange pajamas. It couldn't be Ace for propriety's sake, and the purplette opted to play games instead. That left Peashy to handle the task on her own. She had already seen and felt her own body, but that didn't render her immune to embarrassment from Noire's…
...She looked cute in pajamas.
-------------------------------------------------
Ace, meanwhile, was busy at work pulling all the gunk in the poor woman's lungs and bloodstream.
Using healing magic to bitchslap away the poison of someone who'd gotten hit seconds ago in battle? Almost instant.
Clearing out the system of someone who'd, at his best guess, spent most of the morning exhausting herself and breathing the thickest smog Lastation could produce? Absolute pain in the ass.
What did he get for his troubles? A hook to his jaw. Granted, it had about as much impact as a half-hearted pillow throw on account of how weak the girl was, but it was the principle of the matter.
And he wouldn't lie and say he didn't take pleasure in how she hissed when he flashed some light magic in her eyes to check the pupil contraction. "Well, you're about as recovered as my magic is going to get you. Next time maybe pack an air clearing amulet before going on a smog cloud tour for hours, hmm?"
"Excuse me?" was the CPU's heated response. "I was doing perfectly fine!"
Ace, meanwhile, was left blinking. That… didn't sound at all like he remembered Noire's voice. Much closer to her HDD form. Looked like all he had managed to do for her burnt out throat was save her from sounding like a five packets a day smoker.
Still, it bore asking, even if he had a fair idea of the answer already, "And what would that happen to be? Other than showering my ship's deck in blood and giblets to soften your landing, that is."
"I was…" Noire tried to answer, only to have a similar expression as someone hitting a mental wall. "I was... " She clutched her head. "Why can't I remember?!"
Huh, what do you know, she'd gone and matched Neptune even in this. Typical. "Well, I'd imagine that there imprint," at that he nodded up at the less than photogenic model of Black Heart's face screwed up in preparation for a full frontal, "you were so kind to ram into my ship's deck has something to do with it."
"I-I did what?" She looked up, then blinked. "No way! There's no way I'm as clumsy as… as…"
-------------------------------------------------
"Neppu!"
"What is it, Neptuna?"
"There's a disturbance in the Force, my role taken by another."
"What the goodness?"
-------------------------------------------------
"Neptune caught it on tape, here," he said, passing over his smartphone with the video loaded up. Black Heart had been too plastered in blood and soot to be more than a silhouette, same for when she'd depowered. No fun to give away the game so early.
"T-That's not me at all! That was totally made up," The ravenette insisted, sticking to her story.
"Girl, I had to drag you off and hose you down myself." he shot back, "Then Peashy had to cut you out of that wreck of a dress and finish the cleanup. Those are her spare pajamas you're wearing, by the way, remember to thank her."
Now she sported a blush. "She changed my clothes?!"
He shrugged easily, "It was that or getting a sepsis from all the filth in your defunct dress or leaving you with nothing to wear but a blanket."
"..." She had no ready counter to that, so all she responded with was an attempt at a fuming face. It only came out as a pout.
He was sorely tempted to hum Final Fantasy's victory fanfare, but decided that the poor girl had taken enough hits to her dignity today. As such, he settled for a good-natured chuckle, "Well, at least you're in one piece and in… reasonably good health. Which is a miracle considering all you went through. All that crud you'd breathed in was burning through your system something fierce, in no small thanks to how you'd gone well past running on fumes. Nevermind how you came out of your fall with nothing but a major concussion and a few hairline fractures." he sighed, scratching the back of his head, "I've gotten out all the gunk I could and neutralized the rest, but there was only so much I could do for the damage they'd done, so you'll probably be dealing with a fun one-two combo of fatigue and queasiness until we get you to a better healer. But at least your skull is good as new, so there's that."
She looked away in embarrassment. "...Thanks."
"You're more than welcome," he replied with a genuine smile, "And, hey, you did help us out by slaughtering that swarm of fliers hidden in the smog that'd have ambushed us otherwise, plus goddesses only know how many others if my guess is right. So we can call it even."
"Anyhow, we'll be docking in a couple of hours, we're on a delivery job to the Lastation branch of the Guild. There we can set you up with a proper healing job" he added, switching tracks, "And after that, you got a choice. You can go and strike it out on your own… or you can stick with us and give the adventuring business a go, you're certainly cut for it if that rain of dead monsters was anything to go by."
"I see," she nodded, "I should go back to… I'll consider it." Another mental collision, it looked like.
"About all I can ask," he replied easily, "So, do you feel up to trying your luck with walking to go meet the other two up in the deck?"
"I'll be fine," she answered confidently, then made to stand up and do just that… for all of two seconds, before the lightheadedness came roaring in full force. Her body wasn't looking cooperative either, it seemed, and she opted to take a seat (read, disguise her stumble and fall as such), rather than fall on her face. Once today was enough, thank you very much.
Shrugging, Ace pulled out a Switch from his backpack of wonders, tossing Noire one of the controllers as he fired up Super Mario Party.
Three games in, and the amnesiac girl had managed to regain her gaming skills, her enthusiasm, her competitive spirit, and her vast library of trash talk. It seemed like even physical injury could not crush her capabilities, much to Ace's joy. Multiplayer wasn't fun unless there was an equal amount of teeth-kicking on both sides.
"No! Not the Plunder Chest!"
"It's a legitimate strategy!"
"...Bowser, my buddy, my pal, my main man. I have a job for you."
Ah, perfection.
It was a flurry of notes and a howl across the treetops as the running commenced. For Peashy, it was a different kind of adrenaline, not excitement nor a rush, but this time, out of sheer terror for her life and that of her teammates. Even while the beast was injured, it was still above their league, capable of laying them low, and not in a pleasant manner. Where was the HDD when it was needed? She didn't know if Neptune's was unlocked, and she didn't know if she had one of her own. She didn't look like the Ultradimension Peashy, after all. If anything, she could be like Big Neptune, an older, human counterpart from another dimension.
They'd jumped into the treeline, hoping the obstacles would give the monster pause.
Unfortunately, it was too enraged to care, simply barreling through the trees to get at them, well past the point of feeling pain.
Cooler heads would draw out a plan to exploit this, draw it into a trap, or perhaps flank it in a pincer move to cripple one of its legs for good.
Sadly, rational thought was in very short supply when one was chased by a wolf the size of a truck, with swords for fangs and claws. Nevermind how sorry its state, the damn thing could still snap them like twigs if it got in melee range. The only reason they were still alive was that it'd expended the last of its magic juice on that wind attack earlier.
"Can you shoot it while we're running?!" Peashy's voice could be heard over the commotion. Her eyes quickly scanned the area, looking for where they could make sudden turns and try to throw off the chase.
"Would only piss it off and slow myself do-!" was his aborted reply, lunging forward to snag Neptune off her feet and into a dive, narrowly avoiding the wolf's pounce, the two scrambling to their feet to regain distance before the monster could recover and resume its chase.
The other girl quickly helped them up, then resumed fleeing with them. In the distance was a big tree with a wide, thick trunk, and that gave her a sudden mental lightbulb. "There! Make it ram that!" She pointed. The idea was to run at the tree, then make a sudden turn right in front of it, leaving the zealous pursuer to hit it.
In lieu of answering, Ace cracked off a burst of shots over his shoulder, most bouncing off of the skull or merely nicking the remaining ear, but going off the flinch the monster gave and the furious howl that followed, they did its job deafening it and pissing it right off.
He still almost lost an arm as he dove to the side, keeping on rolling in the ground to get away from the blind charge he was rewarded with. Still, the deafening wet crack of the monster's snout and partly exposed skull against the trunk was music to his ears, while the solid thump of its stunned body crumpling on the ground was the angels from on high singing him an ode.
Now, to make sure the fucker didn't get back up, "Nep, Pea, nail its legs!"
Meanwhile, his handgun had unfinished business with that eye socket.
"Finally!" The fighter sported a wolfish grin. It was a chance to turn the tables on the fiendish predator. Brass-knuckled fists fell upon the wolf's quadriceps with a vengeance. However, the fur, she discovered, might as well be living steel, so she switched to hitting the monster's wounds. Repeatedly. Interestingly enough, a yellow glow began coating her hands with warm energy. She felt her punches pushing through as it did. "Atatatatatata!"
Neptune, for her part, was venting her hate of quick time events in her own unique way, her sword jammed as deep as it'd go into a joint and producing a godawful racket as she rolled and twisted the blade, the bones grinding against each other and the metal, "Row! Row! Fight the power!"
The wolf was less than appreciative of their idea of osteopathy, growling as it tried to shake them off and get back to its feet. Unfortunately for it, its wounds and concussion were having none of it, leaving it to spasm on the floor.
Still, it was far from safe. One wrong twitch and the two girls would end up impaled on one of the bladed claws or crushed under its bulk if they reacted a second too late. Seeming to realise that through the haze of its rattled brain, it made to roll over, intent on crushing the infuriating little gnats nipping at its heels.
Or it would have if Ace hadn't chosen that moment to dump six shots on its eye socket from the opposite side.
Then another twelve when it kept on breathing.
Then a sledgehammer to the skull when his gun sputtered empty and the damn beast was still twitching.
Then another five swings until that godsforsaken skull deigned to cave in.
He couldn't feel his legs, his arms were on fire, his lungs doing their level best to self-destruct and at some point he'd fallen flat on his back if his view of the canopy was anything to go by.
He also happened to be smiling like an idiot.
"Think they'll give us a bonus?"
----------------------------------
It was an exhausted and battered trio that shuffled back to the Guild, the sun setting behind them and the music stringing gently about. They made for a sorry sight, covered in bruises and cuts, nevermind the beating their clothing had taken after so many tumbles through the forest floor diving out of the way of Fido. On the positive side, their new amulets had more than pulled their weight, not a speck of dirt or blood on them, when by all rights they should be positively plastered in the stuff.
It said something about the state of the world and their chosen line of work that they didn't get so much as a second glance from the passersby. Just some adventurers limping home after a rough mission, not even a broken bone to their names.
It actually irritated Ace on some level, that dismissal. Felt like their brush with death was being belittled. Intellectually he understood that to an outsider they just looked roughed up, no serious wounds whatsoever, for the simple reason all the damage was from getting out of the way of attacks that'd have cost them limbs at best. It still rankled all the same.
For Peashy, she was just relieved that they made it through such a battle, bruised but otherwise uninjured. It not being such a big deal was fine with her, since she wasn't the type for undue attention. There were worse scenarios anyway, and she figured that returning adventurers were a common sight around these parts.
Of course, that tune changed right quick when they submitted their ID cards' recordings to the Guild. Because whatever had made mincemeat of that wolf was still out there in the forest. Beyond the risk of an unlucky adventurer team stumbling on it unwittingly, if it kept on displacing powerful monsters like that the entire area had to be shut down. No quests, no trade, no travel, no nothing. Not with the risk of a wounded, enraged monster suddenly bursting in and slaughtering everyone.
Which was why they'd forced themselves to rush back to the Guild as fast as their tortured legs would allow, and all but collapsed at the counter.
It was a kicked anthill now, with adventurers and staff running to and fro, making frantic calls and all but climbing over one another to run out the door. There was a cordon to set up, adventurer teams to recall, emergency rescue teams to dispatch, authorities to contact and coordinate with, the whole nine yards. Talk about a prompt response to an outbreak, albeit that of invasive monsters.
As for them, they'd been helped to a nearby set of chairs and given a round of healing magic. Couldn't do much about the exhaustion, but removing full body bruising from their list of pains was very much appreciated, made them feel a bit less like death warmed over.
At least they'd gotten that bonus. Full payment for the elimination of a Risky Boss-class Fenrir, plus the reward for delivering such critical intel to the Guild as fast as they were able. Then the Guild had gone and doubled both on account of how they were fresh-faced rookies who'd gotten caught in and nearly died to something a team of veteran adventurers should've been dispatched to handle.
The thought of actually not making it made Peashy shudder.
"Hey, Neptune," Ace managed to force out through his less-than-cooperative body.
He took the death rattle from the girl as a "Yes?"
"Next time let's settle for boring." he replied with a chuckle that made his lungs and ribs consider mutiny.
Peashy leaned towards agreement with Ace. It was a bit too much excitement for the day. It also made her wonder how to be more prepared for such an occurrence.
As it turned out, Neptune had enough energy left in her to pout.
---------------------------------
There was nothing like a nice, relaxing view of the daytime sky while lounging around the deck, and playing a phone game. Yes, a deck. It had been a few weeks since the Fenrir incident, and while that forest remained quarantined, the stable questing since then had resulted in a nice set of investments for the trio, the flying ship being one of them. Yep, flying. The nations were floating landmasses, a confirmation of this Gamindustri being the Superdimension.
At this time, they were on one of the usual delivery quests, shipping supplies for the Guild between countries, or in this case, from Planeptune to Lastation. Nice and safe, right? Besides the occasional flying monster, there wasn't much issue, which suited them just fine. Well, a bit less so for Neptune.
The girl in question swung her legs under the railing, idly sending a sword beam to slice off the wing of a flying monster before she let herself fall on her back with a whine, "Bleh, so boooo- ACK!"
Bitching that was cut short by way of a dead monster bird to the face.
Neptune was barely done spitting out the worst of the feathers when another landed on her side, followed by three friends.
Then the smog clouds above thundered and they got treated to a Khornate's wet dream, blood and giblets literally raining down from the sky.
"It's the end of the world already?!" Peashy cried out in shock as she stood. Raining blood and bird chunks weren't helping her imagination, and now she needed her phone cleaned. She was in the final lap of an intense virtual race, too. At least her clothes remained fine.
The ship audibly grumbled, struts and plating creaking and groaning out her foul mood. Far more audible, however, was her captain, "-I M'HA CAGO EN S'HA PUTISSIMA MARE! A QUIN MALPARIT-"
Who needed foghorns when you had angry Catalonian screaming?
Side effects may include sci-fi goddesses in spandex lingerie dropping out of the sky.
And that, kids, was why the LS Dawi had a perfect foot-deep imprint of Black Heart's face on its deck.
The poor goddess in question flailed, taking a good few tries to dislodge her head from the little pocket it'd rammed into the plating.
And, because the universe had it out for her, she overshot and enjoyed herself a nice little ass-over-head tumble through the mess she'd made of the deck.
Concussed, exhausted, covered in gore and fresh off of huffing Lastation's best, most shady chemical-choked smog for hours on end, the goddess did the only sensible thing. That being vomiting, depowering and passing out, not necessarily in that order.
"...Please tell me you two also saw that," pleaded Ace as he felt his reality check bounce.
"Got it on camera!" crowed Neptune, holding up her phone like she was the green twink himself.
"Poor Noire," was Peashy's comment. A head-on impact did not spell good news, one that a certain purplette would easily attest to in canon. "Imagine if that happened to you, Neptuna."
"Pass." was her instant reply, instead electing to have herself some fun with the video.
Tact, thy name is Neptune.
Ace, meanwhile, was already at work hoisting the poor woman like a sack of potatoes. "I'll go hose her off and patch her up, you two clean this mess and keep an eye out for fliers. I don't want a swarm like the one she painted the deck with pounding us from behind."
Them and their fucking luck, he swore to Histoire's antediluvian loli ass.
------------------------------------------------
"Ha! Taste my blue shell!"
"Noooooo…!"
A minute later...
"No way! I call hax!"
"Hehehehehe."
The deck had been cleared and the fallen CPU had been taken care of for the time being, leaving the two women to race each other online. Hooray for free wifi!
For Peashy though, she was a tad flushed on her cheeks. The former Black Heart's dress was such a bloody mess that it was a complete write-off; they had to burn it. She needed new threads in the meantime, and Neptune's spares wouldn't fit. That left the ones in the ginger's own closet.
There was one more snag, however. Noire was still unconscious, and that meant someone had to help her into the new white and orange pajamas. It couldn't be Ace for propriety's sake, and the purplette opted to play games instead. That left Peashy to handle the task on her own. She had already seen and felt her own body, but that didn't render her immune to embarrassment from Noire's…
...She looked cute in pajamas.
-------------------------------------------------
Ace, meanwhile, was busy at work pulling all the gunk in the poor woman's lungs and bloodstream.
Using healing magic to bitchslap away the poison of someone who'd gotten hit seconds ago in battle? Almost instant.
Clearing out the system of someone who'd, at his best guess, spent most of the morning exhausting herself and breathing the thickest smog Lastation could produce? Absolute pain in the ass.
What did he get for his troubles? A hook to his jaw. Granted, it had about as much impact as a half-hearted pillow throw on account of how weak the girl was, but it was the principle of the matter.
And he wouldn't lie and say he didn't take pleasure in how she hissed when he flashed some light magic in her eyes to check the pupil contraction. "Well, you're about as recovered as my magic is going to get you. Next time maybe pack an air clearing amulet before going on a smog cloud tour for hours, hmm?"
"Excuse me?" was the CPU's heated response. "I was doing perfectly fine!"
Ace, meanwhile, was left blinking. That… didn't sound at all like he remembered Noire's voice. Much closer to her HDD form. Looked like all he had managed to do for her burnt out throat was save her from sounding like a five packets a day smoker.
Still, it bore asking, even if he had a fair idea of the answer already, "And what would that happen to be? Other than showering my ship's deck in blood and giblets to soften your landing, that is."
"I was…" Noire tried to answer, only to have a similar expression as someone hitting a mental wall. "I was... " She clutched her head. "Why can't I remember?!"
Huh, what do you know, she'd gone and matched Neptune even in this. Typical. "Well, I'd imagine that there imprint," at that he nodded up at the less than photogenic model of Black Heart's face screwed up in preparation for a full frontal, "you were so kind to ram into my ship's deck has something to do with it."
"I-I did what?" She looked up, then blinked. "No way! There's no way I'm as clumsy as… as…"
-------------------------------------------------
"Neppu!"
"What is it, Neptuna?"
"There's a disturbance in the Force, my role taken by another."
"What the goodness?"
-------------------------------------------------
"Neptune caught it on tape, here," he said, passing over his smartphone with the video loaded up. Black Heart had been too plastered in blood and soot to be more than a silhouette, same for when she'd depowered. No fun to give away the game so early.
"T-That's not me at all! That was totally made up," The ravenette insisted, sticking to her story.
"Girl, I had to drag you off and hose you down myself." he shot back, "Then Peashy had to cut you out of that wreck of a dress and finish the cleanup. Those are her spare pajamas you're wearing, by the way, remember to thank her."
Now she sported a blush. "She changed my clothes?!"
He shrugged easily, "It was that or getting a sepsis from all the filth in your defunct dress or leaving you with nothing to wear but a blanket."
"..." She had no ready counter to that, so all she responded with was an attempt at a fuming face. It only came out as a pout.
He was sorely tempted to hum Final Fantasy's victory fanfare, but decided that the poor girl had taken enough hits to her dignity today. As such, he settled for a good-natured chuckle, "Well, at least you're in one piece and in… reasonably good health. Which is a miracle considering all you went through. All that crud you'd breathed in was burning through your system something fierce, in no small thanks to how you'd gone well past running on fumes. Nevermind how you came out of your fall with nothing but a major concussion and a few hairline fractures." he sighed, scratching the back of his head, "I've gotten out all the gunk I could and neutralized the rest, but there was only so much I could do for the damage they'd done, so you'll probably be dealing with a fun one-two combo of fatigue and queasiness until we get you to a better healer. But at least your skull is good as new, so there's that."
She looked away in embarrassment. "...Thanks."
"You're more than welcome," he replied with a genuine smile, "And, hey, you did help us out by slaughtering that swarm of fliers hidden in the smog that'd have ambushed us otherwise, plus goddesses only know how many others if my guess is right. So we can call it even."
"Anyhow, we'll be docking in a couple of hours, we're on a delivery job to the Lastation branch of the Guild. There we can set you up with a proper healing job" he added, switching tracks, "And after that, you got a choice. You can go and strike it out on your own… or you can stick with us and give the adventuring business a go, you're certainly cut for it if that rain of dead monsters was anything to go by."
"I see," she nodded, "I should go back to… I'll consider it." Another mental collision, it looked like.
"About all I can ask," he replied easily, "So, do you feel up to trying your luck with walking to go meet the other two up in the deck?"
"I'll be fine," she answered confidently, then made to stand up and do just that… for all of two seconds, before the lightheadedness came roaring in full force. Her body wasn't looking cooperative either, it seemed, and she opted to take a seat (read, disguise her stumble and fall as such), rather than fall on her face. Once today was enough, thank you very much.
Shrugging, Ace pulled out a Switch from his backpack of wonders, tossing Noire one of the controllers as he fired up Super Mario Party.
Three games in, and the amnesiac girl had managed to regain her gaming skills, her enthusiasm, her competitive spirit, and her vast library of trash talk. It seemed like even physical injury could not crush her capabilities, much to Ace's joy. Multiplayer wasn't fun unless there was an equal amount of teeth-kicking on both sides.
"No! Not the Plunder Chest!"
"It's a legitimate strategy!"
"...Bowser, my buddy, my pal, my main man. I have a job for you."
Ah, perfection.
ForgottonFuture
Sleepy Queen of Destruction
- Location
- The Future.
- Pronouns
- She/her
Nice to see another update! I like how this rolling, though getting the ship just like that feels a little rushed to me. Maybe you could have made a small arc out of getting it? Either way, nice chapter!
Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
That was the plan.
But after the thing with the Fenrir we couldn't NOT justify getting a shitload of money.
And Ace, being the voice of reason, pushed to get the ship then and there so as to not have a constant expense in renting a room, while also letting take more jobs such as big deliveries.
Metroidwave
Strength To Lean On
- Location
- Somewhere in Colorado
You have my attention.
Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
This is what happens when the protags avoid the main plot like the plague to instead faff around doing sidequests.
More seriously, it is lightly alluded to in the second chapter, with it being one of the "authorities" the Guild contacts and coordinates with to cordon off the eastern forest.
And they'll come up properly at some point when they become relevant for whatever the party's doing.
BlackThief12
I'm a fucking ninja
- Location
- Puerto Rico, Vega Baja
I love this.
Ah yes. Ace. One of the most Badass Normals to Badass. Good taste.
Also was writing a Adult!Peachy SI myself, but it didn't have any real substance to it beyond maybe some Monster Hunter stuff so I scrapped it a while ago. Most of the ones with any real substance seem to be demon invasions tbh. Well only one since the second is more bullet points than anything at this point. And has been for longer than the other one has even existed.
And you're taunting the main plot you know by partying with the CPUs... it looks like maybe no little sis candidates though? Unless its a 2 type plot and they're stuck doing the main quests while their sisters are MIA.
Also was writing a Adult!Peachy SI myself, but it didn't have any real substance to it beyond maybe some Monster Hunter stuff so I scrapped it a while ago. Most of the ones with any real substance seem to be demon invasions tbh. Well only one since the second is more bullet points than anything at this point. And has been for longer than the other one has even existed.
And you're taunting the main plot you know by partying with the CPUs... it looks like maybe no little sis candidates though? Unless its a 2 type plot and they're stuck doing the main quests while their sisters are MIA.
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Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
This is set on Re;Birth 1, so no little sisters in sight for the foreseeable future.
And do feel free to toss us the notes for that defunct project if you want, never know what will spark off ideas.
*mumbles under breath for a bit* "And so I Pray, Unlimited Torch and Pitchfork Works!"
tbh it barely got a starting scene before it died and you're mostly already expanding what ideas I had for that. Treating the monsters as real-time fights where physics actually matter.
FailLord
2050 lb bombs?
- Location
- very high up
And you have totally derailed the plot.
Also is it me or is the plot of RB;1 somewhat watered down compared to the original game
Nihilo
Authorial parasite
- Location
- Catalonia
Worry not, the plot is fully intent on elbow dropping our sorry behinds as payment for ignoring it.
The proverbial draugr are working the fuck out while we faff around.
