It is said that some men age like wine, becoming finer and more distinguished with age, while others age like milk, going sour and losing all their positive characteristics.
Kirl, on the other hand, had aged like oak, which was to say heavily gnarled and that one could bounce an axe off both, doing more damage to the axe than the wood.
Kirl the Barbarian. Kirl the Outlander. Kirl the Mercenary. Kirl the Conqueror. Kirl the Undefeated. Kirl the Indestructible.
Kirl the Old.
Sitting on the bench in the wing of his family cemetery dedicated to just his animal companions, Kirl felt the last one most of all. He had just buried his latest boon companion, and it struck him just how old he was that he had lost so many faithful dogs and horses to simple age that he had needed to rearrange the graves just to fit them all for the honourable burials they deserved. The only reason all of his children weren't already underground was because he'd still been having them at an age when most men were being tended to like babes by their grandchildren.
Even then, he didn't have any direct children who weren't also adults by now.
And yet he only really felt old here, in the heart, when surrounded by the staggering number of friends and family who had passed on to the next life before him. Oh, he wasn't quite as strong or as quick as in his heyday, which was now so long ago that he didn't really remember it so well under all the other things he had done since, but time had only sharpened his mind and his instincts, and even his body had not particularly become frail. Some had even suggested that any decline in peak health had only come about because he no longer needed such abilities as acutely as he once had.
It was, perhaps, because he was "The Old" that he was also feeling the title "The Undefeated" with the sharpness of a dagger in the back. While he had never really bought into the hubris of such an appellation, it wasn't entirely false either. If you were being uncharitable he had more than a few defeats to his name, but only if uncharitable, because if they were real defeats he wouldn't be on this side of the grave being all thoughtful and contemplative. He had set backs, times were he needed to retreat in good order before coming back from another angle, and victories that had felt like losses at the time, but somehow, in the end, no matter the odds, he always pulled off final victory or an honourable tie of the sort where both parties could be said to have won in their own way.
Wandering away from the most recent burial of those close to him, he wandered through the graveyard to the next most recent marker stone and gently laid a hand upon the cut and polished granite. Nothing but the finest for the people near and dear to him. The gesture was an apology and a promise as his mood curled in upon itself. There had been some delay due to the fact that he had wanted for Lucky IV to pass on naturally, because it would be cruel to subject an animal to what he had in mind. He had killed many, many people and animals for many reasons, but he had always tried to avoid needless cruelty. He had stabbed many a dog going for his throat because he was fighting with its master, but that did not mean that he particularly enjoyed that. He had raised so many pups himself, and they had no understanding of the quarrels of men, just of loyalty to their family.
Mostly though, the delay had been in preparation for his latest campaign, which required the gathering of supplies and troops of a quality he had never before done, and that had produced an unavoidable delay. It had only been in the past week or so that he had introduced an avoidable one to allow his final dog his final rest first, and even then the past week had not been spent in idleness.
Marching away from the buried bodies of friends, companions, and so terribly many children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, Kirl made his way down through the steep, narrow streets of his adopted home. The adobe buildings dusted with horse coloured sand and decorated with blue and red tiles in intricate patterns and shaded under fruit trees sat between the ice capped teeth of the mountains and the wine dark waves of the sea, and encapsulated ever environment Kirl had ever been to and fought on. He had ridden from frozen forests into sandy deserts and signed up on ships that sailed between walls of ice and walls of hot forest. He had fought in more battles than he had descendants, until finally one day he had discovered that he had stumbled into a city that was in a jumble of every environment in its own way, and it was calling him its king for some damn fool reason.
Along the way from the cemetery to the port, the people all stopped and stared at him in passage, all silent in fear and awe... although the former was probably in part caused by his grumpiness at that latter. He was a really good killer with a taste for inexpensive pleasures that didn't drain the coffers, that didn't make him some spectacular king worthy of such reverence.
Then again, maybe they were just in awe of how stupid the old man was, which cheered him up a bit.
Arriving at the docks, all other good byes having already been said before he went to bury Lucky, he smiled broadly at those there waiting for him. Chief among them was his oldest surviving lieutenant, Sorn, who had been a boy learning from a great mercenary captain once, and was now easily the second oldest warrior in the kingdom. A finer, more seasoned campaigner and canny general a king could not ask for, and no truer friend could Kirl find on this side of the grave. Grinning toothlessly, the white beard asked with a twinkle in his dark eyes, "Said your last goodbye?"
"Second last, if this all goes right," Kirl grunted as he ran his eyes over the crew of the longship of this final mission. They were all so young to him, and yet the darkest hair among them was still silver. Old warriors all, still with fire in their bellies and strength enough in their arms, and all with their children raised and wives buried.
"And if it doesn't go right?" Sorn asked mischievously.
"Then in a thousand years they'll still be talking about us for what fools we were," Kirl answered with a grin, and both old men let out harsh, barking laughs.
Standing to one side with a bow in hand, Kirl's eldest grandson and designated heir - another grey haired campaigner himself - just shook his head and said, "Grandfather, might I have one final request of you?"
"Well, since you're going to be king, I suppose I might as well see if I can obey someone properly for once in my life," Kirl noted.
Rolling his eyes and muttering, "Like that's ever going to happen..." his grandson then said, "Well, anyway, if you're going to haunt me over this, could you at least make it a public one so I can tell your ghost 'I told you so' where everyone can see?"
Both elders cackled at that and Kirl said, full of all the sombreness he felt the occasion demanded, "Tirjan, I can promise you that whatever happens, this was my choice, as it was the choice of everyone else, and I'm only going to haunt those who blame you for my decision here so I can tell them to lay off you."
A twinkle in his own eye now, the younger man said, "Ah, well, then I guess this isn't our final goodbye then either."
Smirking, the ancient barbarian warlord said, "Careful with that quick wit of yours boy, you might earn yourself responsibility with it one day."
Tirjan nodded once before he paused and then surged forward to wrap his grandfather in a great hug. Tears rimming his eyes, he brushed them away with a silken sleeve before he turned away and said, "Your crew is waiting."
Descending the gangplank to the specially made longship, Kirl silently made his final inspection even as he was fitted in his panoply. Finding everything in order and the sky in the correct position, he ordered his ship to cast off, taking the tiller even as Sorn sat down at the drums to beat out the timing of all this. Rowing without conversation as they made their way from the docks, Kirl finally said, "Last drink boys, and then we see just how mad I really am."
Pulling out the specially prepared witches brew, the old men all shared one last drink as the sun touched the horizon. Casks of extra strength pomegranate brandy were opened and spread across salt and sand soaked sheets and boards, filling the air with intoxicating alcohol fumes even as the strange potion they had all drank started to take effect, making them feel light headed and detached. Now fully pointed in the direction of the setting sun upon the sea, Kirl gestured to the shore. For a brief moment he wondered if his grandson might balk at the last moment, but his faith in the man who would always be a little boy in his mind was rewarded with a single flaming arrow arcing out from the docks.
Kirl smiled as the arrow landed true, catching the liquor soaked ship in blue spirit flames in a handful of heartbeats. Inured with potion and preparation and sheer bloody minded experience against the flames, the men roared as one as they strained with all their might against the oars, desperate to meet the frantic pace set out by Sorn. Blowing a horn he had first blown generations ago and raising his banner high, Kirl called out his final charge.
Of the gods he worshipped, it was said that the best afterlife was reserved for those who fell in honourable battle. Kirl was very old and very skilled, and no one had bested him yet, and he had decided that he did not particularly want to give up his title The Undefeated.
Not even to Death.
Not even to Time.
He wasn't going to wait anymore. Not for his strength to finally give out entirely so he could be beat by a punk with no skill. Not for Death to sneak up on him in his sleep. He was going to charge the gates of the Underworld itself. At least then if he died it would be a truly memorable death and it would be on his terms, and at least in the minds of men he would remain Undefeated.
And, if this worked, maybe, just maybe, his legend wouldn't be just among men when all was said and done.
The sun was slipping beneath the horizon faster than they could chase, even as the fires began to spread beyond the preparations to control it and the stamina of the white beards began to fade, but still Kirl grinned at it all. A strong wind had picked up and perhaps it was senility fuelled insanity and perhaps it was the strange concoction running through his body, but he felt alive like he hadn't since his neighbours had learned to negotiate with his grandchildren instead of picking fights. Tears in his eyes, he knew that if his heart burst here he could still accept whatever came next.
The sun finished setting.
The sea dropped away.
The heat of the flames died off, even if the light did not.
It was like stepping through a doorway, the desert winds across the sun warmed sea disappearing, replaced with the clammy, stagnant air of a bog in winter.
They were through.
A pale starvation victim in a dark cloak was poling a ferry barge across the black waters, illuminated by a lantern that burned with sickly green flame. He looked up from his duty just in time to be run over by the longship, the unexpected arrival possessing more solidity than he was used to. Laughing maniacally as the ferryman floundered in the water, Kirl tossed out an air filled bladder as a charitable gesture. He always felt a little bad for running over people who were only in his way because they were doing an important job, but that had never stopped him before!
Looming out of the mists that closed in at the edge vision yet never drew closer, a shoreline of black stone and white shells appeared before them. Rowing hard as Kirl kept them steady, the men rammed the far shore of the Underworld with the ship and then began to pile out, as if this were any other raid on any other day. Snatching up spear and shield, Kirl jumped out along with them, feeling more spry than he had in a generation, if simply because what protestations his body had simply did not register as important any longer.
Dead spectres drifted in the mists and were shoved out of the way by the wedge of elderly madmen as they charged, screaming, into the Underworld.
Their roars were answered in turn by something from just beyond the fog, the sound like a physical thing that slapped them in the guts even as it failed to perturb them. Uncoiling from about where it had been entwined with the Pillars of Creation, guarding the Gates of the Underworld to keep the living and the dead separated, was Yarmrunyin the Dead Serpent. Slain by the gods in the workings of prophecy, the immortal being could not truly die, and so it sat at in the liminal space between life and death. Clad in scales of white bone and black iron, its yellowed fangs were taller than a man even as they dripped with all the poisons and disease of the world, and its breath smoked with the bone cracking heat of the funeral pyre in its belly.
One day the Dead Serpent would destroy the world, making way for its rebirth and the rebirth of the world by the hands of the gods; or at least that was what the shamans had told Kirl as a boy. Were the tales correct this was a beast that not eve the gods themselves could truly slay, and were they incorrect it was still a giant snake with horrifically deadly venom and fiery breath.
The very point of the wedge, personal banner flying as his spear lead the charge, Kirl kept up his roaring challenge as he ran onward.
His objective...
[] Lay beyond the Gates, the Serpent was but a distraction
[] Was close at hand, guarded by the Serpent
[] Was the Serpent itself!
AN: Something crazy and that should be relatively short to see if I can get my creativity running again