Guess I'll play the opposing side to the fighters argument.
The
Federation Attack Fighter ended up showing up for
only three fleet engagements and only past the mid-point of the war. The three were
Operation Return which is the recapture of Deep Space Nine, the
Second Battle of Chin'Toka which is when the Breen energy dissipator is first used, and finally the Battle of Cardassia where the TV show ran out of money for special effects and reused attack craft footage from Operation Return. Then fighters in general are never used in against military ships again. Especially not by any major or minor alien species past the Dominion war. That's because during the three fleet engagements, they didn't do much.
In Operation Return they maybe killed
one Galor after 4 waves of attacks. (It could be argued it was only disabled from the CGI effects.) The fighters don't even manage to succeed in Sisko's objective of forcing the Cardassians to break formation, the Cardassians broke formation in a planned trap and Sisko had to throw in wings of Galaxy-class ships to counter it.
In the Second Battle Chin'Toka, they were visible only briefly and achieved no effects. To be fair, most of the fleet failed to do anything too.
What we do see fighters used pre- and post- Dominion war were on
patrol, search-and-rescue, coast guard duties as we see in Lower Decks and
non-state actions from the Maquis and Cardassian civilians.
Nailing a single
Galor, given the tiny size of the Federation Fighter, means that even if they killed
zero more ships in the entire war and there were 1000 fighter losses means that they already are breaking even, tonnage-wise. There's also the Terran Raider, in a similar size class, which can kill a Bird of Prey according to Memory Alpha, the Danube-class runabout, which is about ~23m long (15% larger than a modern 5th gen like the J-20) being capable of carrying and launching multiple
full size photon torpedoes, which definitely can hurt a warship. There's enough reason to believe that small ships are quite valid and threatening in canon, and the explanation for them not showing up that much is more 'budget' than anything else.
The fact that fighters are usable in a patrol situation, where they will be quite potentially the first line of defense against a hostile incursion - because 'patrol ship' in Star Trek is not the same thing as a coast guard cutter in real life - is evidence against the argument that they're "inefficient and ineffective" - especially because the complete lack of crew comfort and the lack of indication of any long endurance ability (which is also part and parcel of crew comfort) and thus would have very little selling them as patrol vessels unless they are very cheap for the combat power and presence they provide.
So here's my thought: Starfleet only used attack craft in the Dominion War because they were short on ships. They pulled all the patrol craft from colonies all across the Federation to assemble a few wings out of desperation. Afterwards they weren't used in the same manner again. Fighter craft were ineffective and inefficient desperation weapons in a full out battle.
That's why the Starfleet doesn't build carrier craft and patrol around with them. The same ineffective and inefficiencies also see no other major species put them to use. I don't see a way to square the circle of canon not using them.
(That's not to say fighters don't show up. Shinzon had wings of Scopion-class attack fliers on his Scimitar, but it looks like they were used for ground attack. Shinzon didn't deploy them during the fight with the Enterprise-E, and continued to not deploy them even after the Ent-E and Scimitar were both damaged, without shields or weapons. Hell, the Ent-E didn't deploy its shuttles either.)
Fighters can operate mostly offscreen, just like the vast majority of the Federation's presumed warfighting technology unless we actually do assume it just bumblefucks military engagements by sending endless waves of redshirts, which may be funny but is kind of grossly out of character and is trying to insist on a Watsonian framework to explain something that can easily be explained by the Doylist effect of 'war is expensive to shoot, space war is also expensive, and the Star Trek setting designers didn't want to create a massive field manual of how combat worked in the setting.'
Moreover, fighter-size craft continuously show up as vessels which are used for planetary defense, a situation which makes little sense if they're "ineffective and inefficient desperation weapons" (because then you're spending a lot of money for ships that aren't capable of performing their role) - and in fact most of the deployments of fighters we see are actually in full-scale battles. The canon suggests the opposite is true - fighters are common when you're already assembling the logistics lines and accepting the losses which come with large-scale battles, but vanish outside of that context. And the fact that fighters have at least one confirmed kill of a ship literally a thousand times their size (which was not swarmed down by hundreds of fighters focusing on that one vessel) mean they've acquitted themselves fairly well already.
If you absolutely need an explanation which isn't "real world budget," fighters may well be logistically difficult to employ offensively due to their short legs and high levels of miniaturization, using components with a fairly low mean time before failure at full combat power (so you need to recheck and repair fighters after every sortie, while a starship keeps chugging along). A major benefit of fighters would be that you can build them outside of full-size yards, which is less relevant during non-wartime conditions. You have to deploy them in the engagement itself, because fighters' short legs and slow FTL speeds (if they can even FTL) mean you can't stand off, so a fighter carrier also has to be built as a warship in its own right. And obviously, they have no other use but combat operations.
All of these factors can easily result in a world where fighters are generally deployed 'offscreen' in most situations while still being functional and effective in their niche of "short-range strike platforms."
It makes sense to me that fighters aren't a thing in Star Trek, because defense and speed in Star Trek is a function of reactor power. It's always been a fact that the bigger the ship, the more powerful the shields. And the bigger the ship, the higher the warp factor it can go. Also more room for torpedoes. For fast attack craft to be viable, ships need to be a certain size. The Dominion, Federation, and Klingons figured that size out with the Jem'Hadar attack craft, Defiant and Bird-of-Prey classes in canon. In quest we have our Selachii and the Klingon/Romulan Birds-of-Prey.
Mass and volume clearly matter for relative defensive capability and maneuverability. Star Trek engines do not have speed dependent entirely on engine power, irrespective of mass. It still exists in a realm where 'smaller' is generally associated with 'more maneuverable.' Star Trek shields don't really show clear mechanics and may well require greater power for the same effect over a larger surface area, which
relatively favors large ships (more mass per volume) but means smaller ships scale well. And of course, the survivability onion exists, and if you don't get hit - something which is easier with a smaller sensors signature and smaller profile, because phasers and photon torpedoes are clearly not 100% accurate 100% of the time guaranteed damage weapons, to say nothing about other weapons systems like the (inaccurate) disruptor cannons - you can't exactly take advantage of weak shields.
The Daystrom post points out that an attack fighter took two phaser shots to kill - they don't exactly pop at the first sign of any sort of hostile fire, either. And Danube-classes show that a 20-meter long vessel can deploy a full-size photon torpedo, even if there are presumably limitations (range, sustained rate of fire) which hurt it.
In real life, offensive weaponry trumps armor. A single anti-shipping missile can mission kill a capital ship. The horizon also means naval ships can only see so far before the curvature of the earth blocks the view. So in real life a fighter can carry that missile above the horizon and away from a carrier to strike the enemy. In Star Trek, a ship can take multiple torpedo hits and has no horizon to block their sensors. Capital ships end up engaging each other to the extent of their weapons.
The paradigm you're sketching out where there is no horizon and fighters in Star Trek would be relatively slow, relatively poorly armed, and relatively fragile already exists. It's the paradigm of the Star Fleet Universe, and
even then fighters are extremely viable and useful weapons systems because as it turns out, a 20 meter long ship that can launch a single photon torpedo or equip a weaker but still functional phaser and survive a little bit of fire and you can carry a dozen of is a huge force multiplier even if it is slow enough that you can try to outrun it, because they restrict your ability to maneuver, force you to keep speed up (which means less power to shields and weapons), and their ability to pounce on and gut you the moment you show any weakness is a great deterrence to an engagement. They just aren't so useful as to obsolete all non-fighter carrier warships. Which is fine, nobody wants
that, but there's a wide region for fighters to be broadly useful enough in wartime that they show up there and not so overwhelming that every ship needs to carry them.
Similarly, the thing about SFU-type fighters is that they're an
attrition unit. Attrition units are not something which meshes well with the Federation's doctrine of not throwing large numbers of guys at an enemy. Similarly, they're logistically intensive enough that they aren't great for invading people.