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Spacehillbilly reads Chick Tracts

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Spacehillbilly

Spacehillbilly

Banned Forever
Banned
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Los Angles
Their exists a universe in which normal every day a folk are terrorized by supernatural forces. A world in which in which conspiracies are every where. Everywhere lurks a sinister cult ready to shed blood for their god. The universe is at the mercy of a tyrannical wrathful deity. And it all shall lead to the destruction of human civilization.

This universe is not the Cthulhu Mythos nor is it Warhammer 40k.

It's something must worse than those.

It is the comics of Jack T Chick!

For those of you who don't know, Jack Chick was a infamous evangelical Christian fundamentalist cartoonist who would make Tracts that were designed to proselytize his faith, or more accurately his batshit insane worldview.

His worldview is as follows.

. Satan is everywhere and is more powerful then god.
. The Catholic Church is actually Satanic.
. Rock and Roll, D&D, Harry Potter, Evolution, Athiesm, Halloween and Homosexuality are the work of Satan and his minions.
. Everyone is a sinner and is doomed to eternal damnation unless they believe in Jesus.
. Even if your a good person, your still going to hell unless you pray to Jesus.
. No one has ever heard of Jesus and his teachings.

And so on and so forth.

There are hundreds of these Tracts online.

Let the pain begin.

Note: I had a poll, but I got rid of it for it was too long.
 
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Dark Dungeons part 1
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    • Our first tract we have is Dark Dungeon. This tract was at height of the Satanic Panic. This was a time in which people sincerely believed that D&D was a satanic force.

    Another notable thing about this tract is that it got adapted into a movie!

    Note: I have planned on getting into D&D but haven't found the time to start, so my knowledge is rusty. Please correct me if I state anything incorrect about the game.



    The comic starts off with our protagonist in the midst of a Dunge.....er, Dark Dungeons session.



    Damn girl, it's just a game, Just make another character. Or is this comic implying that gamers think the game is real or something?



    How does your personality decide your level of education in the arcane arts?

    At first glance you may think these pepole are crazy for believing that D&D teaches you magic, and not the David Copperfield type but full on Harry Potter level magic.

    Their not.

    During the Satanic Panic, some fundementalist like Chick believed that D&D leads to Witchcraft and that magic was real.




    Seriously, this is what some people in the 80s believed.

    Also Temple of Diana? So they worship Wonder Woman?

    Also if D&D gave me magical powers I would play it every week.


    This is just the tip of the Iceberg. More craziness happens from there.
     
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    • Spacehillbilly said:



    Our first tract we have is Dark Dungeon. This tract was at height of the Satanic Panic. This was a time in which people sincerely believed that D&D was a satanic force.

    Another notable thing about this tract is that it got adapted into a movie!

    Note: I have planned on getting into D&D but haven't found the time to start, so my knowledge is rusty. Please correct me if I state anything incorrect about the game.



    The comic starts off with our protagonist in the midst of a Dunge.....er, Dark Dungeons session.



    Damn girl, it's just a game, Just make another character. Or is this comic implying that gamers think the game is real or something?



    How does your personality decide your level of education in the arcane arts?

    At first glance you may think these pepole are crazy for believing that D&D teaches you magic, and not the David Copperfield type but full on Harry Potter level magic.

    Their not.

    During the Satanic Panic, some fundementalist like Chick believed that D&D leads to Witchcraft and that magic was real.




    Seriously, this is what some people in the 80s believed.

    Also Temple of Diana? So they worship Wonder Woman?

    Also if D&D gave me magical powers I would play it every week.


    This is just the tip of the Iceberg. More craziness happens from there.
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    This was the Chick Tract that convinced me to buy D&D.

    I love the equal gender representation in the gaming group. Very progressive. (Surely a sign of Satan's influence!) Also the giant, awesome minis and battle mat. The macrame plant hanger is a nicely 1980s touch, too.

    Did you know this tract got a movie adaptation?
     
    mesonoxian said:
    This was the Chick Tract that convinced me to buy D&D.

    I love the equal gender representation in the gaming group. Very progressive. (Surely a sign of Satan's influence!) Also the giant, awesome minis and battle mat. The macrame plant hanger is a nicely 1980s touch, too.

    Did you know this tract got a movie adaptation?
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...

    My tabletop gaming friends and I watched the movie and laughed a bunch, especially at
    1. the part where the D&D group is shown in this rave- that's just silly.
    2. 6 players + GM, especially with at least two new players? That's a lot of player to keep track of, even if everyone at the table is experienced; it's going to be one long slog explaining things to the newbies.
    3. It's usually boring watching a game played by someone else. Reading Old Man Henderson's adventures is enjoyable, but the usual chatter IC and OOC can make thing drag on.
    4. Did...did she just throw that into the fire pit!?! BITCH, PEWTER FIGURINES DON'T GROW ON TREES! (Okay, we didn't laugh at this so much, but seriously, those are at least 8+ bucks apiece and they add up.)
     
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    Spacehillbilly said:
    How does your personality decide your level of education in the arcane arts?
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...

    See, the thing is that Dungeons and- DARK DUNGEONS brainwashes you into becoming more attuned to the dark arts and welcoming of its power. Like Marcy's reaction upon losing her character is supposed to show how far she's gone and succumbed to Dark Dungeon's horribly Satanic ways, because she is so dependent upon it that her character dying causes her to totally freak out and her whole BODY TO SHAKE I guess (gotta love that Chick art).

    I honestly find it pretty great that for some reason it's only when your fictional character reaches a certain level that it becomes okay to give people the real power. Why 8? That seems kinda arbitrary. Also what about classes that don't conveniently rely on magic? What do barbarians and Paladins get for embracing the Dark Arts?
     
    QueenPally said:
    My tabletop gaming friends and I watched the movie and laughed a bunch, especially at
    1. the part where the D&D group is shown in this rave- that's just silly.
    2. 6 players + GM, especially with at least two new players? That's a lot of player to keep track of, even if everyone at the table is experienced; it's going to be one long slog explaining things to the newbies.
    3. It's usually boring watching a game played by someone else. Reading Old Man Henderson's adventures is enjoyable, but the usual chatter IC and OOC can make thing drag on.
    4. Did...did she just throw that into the fire pit!?! BITCH, PEWTER FIGURINES DON'T GROW ON TREES! (Okay, we didn't laugh at this so much, but seriously, those are at least 8+ bucks apiece and they add up.)
    Click to expand...
    Click to shrink...
    Actually, a lot of early edition stuff was optimized for 4-6 rather than the now traditional 4, so for the time it was first written that part is actually right. Your other points all stand though.

    Oh, and OP? You forgot to mention that Chick is a KJV Only Christian, and believes that all other versions, including the original Aramaic, Hebrew, and Greek versions of the various books are corrupt and that God personally guided the creation of the One True Version.
     
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