Snapping Turtle [Naruto SI]
- Thread starter Chairtastic
- Start date
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Almost certainly? But there are Uchiha in those teams, which seems odd. I wouldn't have thought Danzo had that kind of access to them for ROOT.
Spectrum
Tell me a secret~
- Location
- Behind you~
In a more comedic take, he'd put on there something that he only believes doesn't exist but obviously does if you aren't a hard ninja who makes hard decisions.
Ch 59
Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Chapter 59: Nobody Wins
---
Genin Aburame
Shibi had his insects keeping a watch on the 'genin' who lingered in the trees, all while he kept his eyes on the presentation Noburu put on for the assembled teams. The sun began to set -- and cast the sky in orange and purple with only the faintest hint of stars.
Noburu had created a dark coral screen, and transformed a clone into a slide projector. The other genin seemed astonished that the transformation jutsu could do that -- which made Shibi realize the Academy didn't really do much to make them aware of how powerful that jutsu could be.
Or maybe they had mistaken Noburu's clone jutsu for the insubstantial one. Either or.
Shibi ate his beef fried rice in silence as he watched.
"Alright," Noburu said and clapped his hands for the slide projector to move to the first slide. It showed a topography map of the shore, lake bed, and a bit of the island on the far side. "This is the thinnest spot between the lake and the island. It is advised to cross here, to minimize the chances of being attacked."
Shibi noticed that the topography map included two large cave entrances on the island's side, where the shore was steep.
"As you can see, there are these cave entrances, we don't know how deep they go -- but there is a chance these are meant to feed wells inside the town." Noburu tapped the cave entrances on the slide. "So take care near them, they could have something nasty as a surprise. Questions so far?"
Hiashi raised his hand to be called on.
"Yes you, with sorrowful eyes?" Noburu pointed at him, uncaring about the wave of giggles that followed his jab.
Hiashi scowled, but spoke anyway. "Why do we need to know the topography of this section of the lake?"
"Because you need to know how deep it is." Noburu clapped his hands and the slide changed to display side-views of a spike-shell turtle, grisly pike, and a leech. "Grisly pike typically need a certain depth to move around in -- or they risk beaching themselves. Spike-shell turtles are bottom-dwellers, and they will chase you into shallow water." He tapped the animals on the screen, then circled the leech. "These fuckers are just as able to kill you. They are swimming around inthe shallows. Don't fucks with them."
One of the older genin raised her hand, she was a genjutsu type -- Shibi recognized her from seminars on new techniques. "Alright, that makes sense for the depth. But why do you include stuff like fallen trees and wrecked boats, n'shit?"
"Because Danzo Shimura said the boats were a safe way to cross." Noburu pointed at the boat out on the lake's surface. "But these ones all look identical to that one." He circled three sunken boats, all close together. "Which means either there's something unique about that boat, or, more likely, he's a dirty liar."
Shibi lifted his sunglasses to get a better look at the boats on the slide. They were all identical to the boat on the water.
Shibi's kikaichu bugs reported movement in the genin teams in the trees -- they were relocating, to a position further north. The reason, it seemed, was that a fire country moose was in the area.
He processed that over a couple seconds and almost choked on his fried rice once it clicked.
"Shibi," Noburu paused his presentation on the most viable ways to cross the lake to point his way. "I know the food's good, but it's not 'kill yourself' good. Junko, can you help him out?"
Shibi desperately wanted to get his choking under control before Junko could help him. He'd seen how she 'helped' people. While the energetic Kaguya skipped over, Shibi tried to speak. "Th-hck. Ther--cff!"
Junko grinned malevolently as she placed one hand on Shibi's shoulder, and raised the other as a closed fist. She was facing him from the side, which meant only one thing..
There was no escape, Shibi braced himself. When the blow came, it knocked all the wind out of him Junko's punch to his solar plexus was strong enough to lift him off the ground. The chunk of rice and beef which had blocked Shibi's airway flew out of his mouth and struck Tsume's dog in the face.
While Shibi recovered his air, and Kuromaru ate his sudden treat, Noburu continued the presentation.
"Right -- the best way to cross would be to cross in bubbles." Noburu clapped his hands and the slide changed to indicate them all floating over the water. "Trouble is -- there are Uchiha among us." He glanced at the relevant parties. "And getting y'all into one bubble would require me shrinking you down."
Junko helped support Shibi until he was able to breathe normally. As soon as he was, he spoke up.
"There is a moose nearby," he tried to look impassive as he cleaned rice grains off his face. "It's made the other genin team move."
"Hmm? Oh, yeah, that'd be perfect for a distraction if we cross the river normally." Noburu glanced around, uncaring while the Konoha ninja all seemed visibly concerned. "Everyone who can water-walk, raise your hands."
Shibi and Junko put up their hands, along with virtually everyone else in the meeting -- most of them, hesitant. Except the rookies.
Choza Akimichi shrank down as he noticed they were the only ones without their hands up. Inoichi Yamanaka's face turned red. Shikaku Nara pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Right -- as soon as everyone's eaten up, Junko and Haruki will grab the moose. I'll get you three across as soon as the water's clear for everyone to run." Noburu crossed his arms. "If y'all want our help getting back across the lake, just meet up with us once you've found your stuff. I look forward to seeing you in the next round of the Exams -- single combat."
"Wait," one of the Uchihas called out and pointed dramatically at Noburu. "You did steal intel about the exams!"
"No, your leadership just picks the wrong stuff to guard about the exam. They're always 'intel, survival, combat', in that order." Noburu clapped his hands and a slide shut down. "Now, everyone chow down. Choza, Haruki, and I worked really hard on that food." He pointed at Shibi again. "But don't choke on it! It's not that good!"
--
Legendary Sannin Jiraiya
Ever since the news from the start of the second exam had reached the Hokage Tower, Jiraiya had been a giggly bitch. He could hardly go a few minutes without devolving into giggles. It was a common problem in the Tower, but his case was the worst of all of them.
He had to tell them. Jiraiya wrote down a note in a scroll for a messenger toad to take to Tsunade. It read: 'Tell Raiga his team found out how to legitimately piss Danzo off. I'm laughing myself into an early grave.'
The old geezers, Kotaru, Homura, and Danzo all glared at him as the messenger toad left. The four of them sat in the Hokage's office, with Danzo in the guest seat opposite Sarutobi-sensei's conversation chair, and Jiraiya on the couch opposite Kotaru and Homura on its twin.
"I'm pleased you find humor in the subversion of the exam's intended purpose," Danzo ground out, the picture of composure even as he gripped the arms of his chair with white-knuckle strength. "It means there is some silver lining to this, after all."
"Yeah -- it means this batch of genin we've got has people smart enough to look underneath the underneath." Jiraiya rested his elbow on his knee and used it to hold up his chin. He just looked Danzo's way and giggled every few seconds. "We have genin smart enough to realize the whole world doesn't have to be their enemy. A beautiful thing, that."
"The purpose of the second exam is to test their survival abilities," Kotaru said with a bitter frown. "I don't like it, but cooperation is a valid way to survive. Given we have a war coming closer every day, I'm tempted to fail this whole batch of genin on principle."
Homura arched his eyebrow and turned to look at her. "You think cooperation makes them undeserving of being chunin?"
"I think we ought to try again next year, with more attention to detail on the individual exams." Kotaru crossed her arms and shook her head. "This subversion has made it so we have no idea how they would survive out in the field. Cooperation is valid -- but we need to see how they deal with being on their own."
"The power to pass or fail the genin does not fall squarely on us." Danzo spoke with a flat, emotionless voice while his hands strained to break the arms of his chair off. "Jiraiya, as Jounin Commander and acting Hokage, has two votes. We each have one. And the daimyo must agree with our reasoning."
"Which he won't," Jiraiya added, smug as a pig in shit. "Because he'll hear 'they worked together' and think, like sane people, 'oh wow, that's great'." He grinned, wide and spiteful. "Because, in a war, soldiers who can work with their 'competition' are vital for any alliances we form."
Homura glanced at each of them, and sighed. "I can see all your points. This chunin exam hasn't gone how any of us planned." He adjusted his glasses. "We need troops who can survive hostile conditions, we need troops who can be ruthless in the execution of their missions… but Jiraiya's point rings truest." He avoided Kotaru and Danzo's gaze as they glared at him.
"Konoha's resources are not infinite. We need troops who can at least be civil with forces from other villages who are not in direct warfare with us." Homura finished and met Jiraiya's gaze. "My official vote won't be given until after the third portion of the exam."
Jiraiya grinned just a bit wider as Danzo's right armrest finally snapped. It was so satisfying to see one of the geezers break from Danzo's mind control. "I'm just… trying to burn this into my memory." Jiraiya announced and gestured toward Danzo. "This look of frustration as you've lost this time, old man." Jiraiya took a deep breath, pleased with himself. "It's like the world just became a slightly happier place to be, ya know?"
Danzo glared at him, all pretense of being unemotional gone -- in its place was an expression of keenly focused anger. "You think I've lost, Jiraiya? The exam is still going. Things can change."
"Maybe." Jiraiya shrugged. "But the most important part is you think you've lost." He stuck his tongue out at the elder ninja. "Whatever you're plotting might recover, but you didn't turn these genin into crabs in a bucket, or bloodthirsty monsters."
"We shall see."
--
Genin Fujimoto
Haruki lept through the trees like a chipmunk, blood on his sword and a smirk on his lips. Behind him, a moose barreled through the trees with a bloody gash along its flank, and a spot of blood on the opposite side.
Junko giggled madly as she skipped through the trees faster than Haruki could at a normal run. Blood dripped down from one of her fingers as she glanced back at the enraged creature. "Ooh, it's so mad~"
"Probably used to humans being afraid of it," Haruki called back. They made it to the treeline and jumped. Both of them landed on the ground and bolted for the shore where the rest of the genin were waiting.
Behind them, the moose emerged from the trees with furious cries. Three meters tall, just as long, and with a rack of the same distance from point to point, the moose had a dappled fur of whites and browns, with a long tail that ended in a jagged club of antler-bone. It charged after them, faster than any civilian could run.
The genin were grouped up at the campsite, ready to bolt as soon as the lake was safe. Safe-ish, anyway.
"Ready for the stumble-slam, Junko?"
"Stumble-slam, gotcha!" She gave him the thumbs up and actually deigned to run to gain some distance.
Haruki flicked the blood off his katana, sheathed it, and took a shuriken from his holster. "Fire release: Flaming caltrop." He went to work making handsigns with the shuriken between his hands. When it was done, he dropped it as he ran -- while it began to glow violent orange and white.
The moose was not smart enough spot it, and soon planted its foot right onto the hot metal. A pained howl echoed from the animal as it struggled to resolve the issue of its momentum with the inability to put weight on one of its limbs and ended up skidding until it began to stumble.
As soon as it did, Junko appeared. Grinning like a demon she had run forward and looped around and came right at the animal. Haruki smirked as he passed her, and saw she had her fist raised.
Wham!
Seconds later, she struck the moose right on the skullcap when it had stumbled too severely. All its forward momentum was put to a quick end, and the concussed animal flipped over Junko to crash into the ground with its legs in the air.
With smaller targets, stumble-slam would send them through a wall or eight. It depended on how much time to build momentum Junko got.
The concussed moose was dragged by Haruki and Junko -- mostly Junko -- until they got to the campsite where Noburu could help.
"One!" "Two!" "Three!" "Dinnertime!" The three of them heaved the moose into the air and tossed it right into the lake. The water woke the moose from its concussed state enough for it to realize it was in danger as something began to drag it underwater.
With literal blood in the water, the genin made their break for the island.
The moose's thrashing kept it alive long enough for every spike-shell turtle and grisly pike in the area to want a piece of it.
Twenty-one genin started off from the shore, and other than some slowdowns from attacks from leeches, they all made it. The genin gathered in what had once been a wealthy home, multiple buildings with a courtyard and a moon gate to an overgrown garden.
Incomplete human remains were present in both the buildings and courtyard. Faded bloodstains indicated people were dragged out of the broken double-doors to the estate. Only the garden was safe, with claw marks on the moon gate and the only intact remains therein.
Haruki heated up a kunai and helped Noburu peel off the leeches that had latched onto some genin, then assisted in bandaging the wounds. While the genin used what earth-release techniques they knew to block off the broken gate, Junko collected the bodies for a burning pile.
"Right." Noburu announced once everyone was patched up. "Be on the lookout for any spike-shell turtles that are wandering town looking for food. I ain't your boss, but this place is going to be pretty safe from them with that barrier you got up."
Haruki didn't say anything about the shoddy craftsmanship on the barrier. It fractured the surrounding wall because they couldn't make it fit snugly. He very pointedly kept his mouth shut on that issue.
"Good hunting everyone -- smoke if you got 'em, get to work if you don't!"
Most of the genin teams jumped to the tiled rooftops and slipped off into the night to find quiet spots to check their scrolls. Hizashi and Hiashi's teams remained, however.
Noburu reached into his hoodie pocket and pulled out doll-sized rookie genin one at a time. "You guys have a good trip?"
Choza, the size of a mouse, held up a corn kernel. "This is great!" His voice was adorably squeaky. "I can make this last so much longer than normal!"
"Get us back to normal, pronto!" Inoichi, his voice just as squeaky, roared with fury. "And wash that hoodie more -- there's lint in the pocket!" He pointed dramatically, angry beyond all reason.
"Meh," tiny little Shikaku shrugged. "Was really warm, at least."
"Reduction ninjutsu, release!" Noburu made a handsign, and the three genin vanished in puffs of smoke.
When it cleared, the three genin were their proper sizes. And almost immediately, they started shivering.
"Oh Guanyin's unlying hips," Haruki muttered and reached into his robes. "Here." He grabbed a scroll from a hidden holster, opened it, and drew blood across the seals inside. Three fluffy fur-lined hoodies, all plus-sized, emerged and were roughly tossed at the genin. "I can't stand watching you three look pathetic, take these and tell no one where you got them."
The rookies were too cold to argue the point, and hastily put on the hoodies. Given their oversized nature, even Choza's went down past his knees.
"Oh spirits, this is so warm," Shikaku said with only his lower jaw visible under the hood.
Kushina and Junko were giggling like mad as the rookies jumped away.
"Those were all made in Moon Country style," Hiashi noted with an arched eyebrow. "Those… had to be expensive."
"Yes. They were. But they're meant to help people survive Snow Country, so they'll keep them alive." Haruki crossed his arms and scoffed.
"I thought you former Kiri ninja were all killing machines," Tsume muttered, disappointed. "But you're a softie." Kuromaru barked once in agreement.
"I suppose you squirrel-people would know, being the softest ninjas on the continent." Haruki glared. "But… at least they won't freeze out there."
Hiashi's team bounded off for the rooftops shortly after that, with their Hyuga team member lagging behind.
"We'll be fine, Lord Hiashi," Hizashi said with a forced respectful tone. "We know they're there, and we can deal with them."
Haruki narrowed his eyes at Hizashi, but said nothing to contradict his friend's words. Once Hiashi left, hesitantly, Haruki voiced his question. "Something we should know?"
"The tree ninja crossed the lake at the same time as us." Hizashi tilted his head ever-so-slightly toward the garden. "Shibi's kikaichu tipped us off."
Ah. They had guests in their new home. Haruki glanced at Kushina and saw chains of chakra grow from her hands to wrap around her fingers like knuckle-dusters. He glanced at Shibi and saw the teen's bugs crawling down his legs in visible lines. Junko laid her hand gently on Nuibari's hilt. A flash of gold precipitated Noburu's teeth visibly sharpening.
Haruki took a deep breath and exhaled a cloud of steam. "Alright." He leaned his head to and fro, popping his neck. "Shall we?"
"Junko," Noburu sing-songed. "It's your turn~"
Junko smiled, and flicked her wrist casually. Nuibari flew silently, the bandages left behind, and pierced through the garden wall. A pained cry echoed, and prompted the two genin teams to scatter as their enemies did as well.
Haruki found an opponent with red eyes filled with spinning tomoe. An older teen dressed in black clothes in a similar tasteful asymmetrical design to his own wardrobe. The Uchiha had a blunt-tipped tanto in one hand, and a trio of smokebombs in the other.
They found each other on the railing of the second floor balcony to the estate's main house. The third floor had collapsed on the second, and left nothing but splintered wood and trapped corpses besides the balcony.
Haruki's katana came out for the second time that night, as the two sized each other up. He noticed that the Uchiha's eyes only had two tomoe, and smirked to himself. Without the third, he wouldn't be able to outpace Haruki.
"Would asking for your surrender do anything?" Haruki asked, to which the Uchiha pulled his arm back. "Guess not."
While the Uchiha threw the smokebombs, Haruki molded chakra and formed a handsign with his free hand.
"Water release: Hidden mist jutsu!"
A cloud of thick white mist pushed the black smoke out of the way, while two plumes of similar mist went up from Noburu and Junko's positions, presumably. While the air rang out with clashes of steel, coral, and chain, Haruki closed his eyes and focused.
The Uchiha he fought was fast -- but Haruki was a sensor and trained in silent killing. He silently went from the railing to the balcony itself, and swiped his katana at the Uchiha who had tried to swipe his last known position. The alleged genin managed to use his forward momentum to dodge, however.
Haruki and the Uchiha danced like that for a while, in the thick mists. Move, dodge, attack. Sometimes the Uchiha would dare attack Haruki with fire jutsu -- which Haruki would return in kind.
It was all too easy.
"Haruki!" Someone was shouting at him, but he wast distracted by a fireball that came way too close.
But why did he feel so cold?
Haruki swung his sword and came so close to getting the Uchiha -- but the Konoha ninja was able to slip into the mist. He hadn't worked up much of a sweat, but he felt so tired. Something didn't add up.
"Haruki, no!"
He couldn't move, he realized. The Uchiha didn't move either. But Haruki couldn't move. His limbs didn't respond.
A spike of killing intent so dire Haruki momentarily thought Orochimaru had arrived precipitated a roar. Kushina, deep lines on her face and her eyes bloody read, with her teeth all replaced with shearing teeth, jumped up to the balcony with a bloody haze in her wake. She swiped at the thin air and chased after something which wasn't there.
"Noburu, get over there!"
And Haruki still couldn't move. He didn't understand why he was so cold. It was like he was trapped in the middle of a swing at the Uchiha -- who was also trapped.
Haruki suddenly pieced together what could have happened, and flexed his chakra. "Kai." Like a puff of smoke, the Uchiha vanished and was replaced with a section of balcony where his katana was embedded.
He was slumped against the corner of the balcony -- there was so much blood all over his clothes and the wood. He'd been in a genjutsu. He still couldn't move, and it became hard to see.
He made out vaguely cow-patterned arms in his diminishing field of vision, and some residual warmth. But it all seemed like it was far away.
He was dying.
His limited field of view changed so that he saw a byakugan eye through shutter-shades. His adopted brother. The one who told him the name of the game for the afterlife was reincarnation. That made Haruki smile. He'd see them again.
He wasn't afraid, even as the building shook, and faint roars echoed.
Noburu was trying to put something in Haruki's mouth, a little pebble it felt like. Haruki didn't fight it, but it didn't seem to do much.
Really, the only thing he regretted was that he wouldn't get to thank Akami for being such a good mom in the three years he'd known her. She'd been better than either of Haruki's original parents. Raiga-sensei and Sayaka would understand. It came with their line of work.
He wasn't cold anymore. But it was very dark.
And then there was nothing.
---
Howdy y'all, ten internet cookies if y'all can tell me what is the one thing you don't do when fighting someone with the sharingan. The absolute most important thing you don't ever do.
…
Did you say 'make eye contact'?! Yay! You win ten internet cookies! Collect them at your local Cookie Express.
Medical ninjutsu can fix a lot of things -- but there is a point where a body loses so much blood that it can't survive long enough to receive a transfusion. And that's assuming that you have blood to transfuse. Not even a blood pill can fix it. Not even the Legendary Sannin Tsunade can fix it.
RIP Haruki Fujimoto, beloved son and brother, gone too soon.
---
Genin Aburame
Shibi had his insects keeping a watch on the 'genin' who lingered in the trees, all while he kept his eyes on the presentation Noburu put on for the assembled teams. The sun began to set -- and cast the sky in orange and purple with only the faintest hint of stars.
Noburu had created a dark coral screen, and transformed a clone into a slide projector. The other genin seemed astonished that the transformation jutsu could do that -- which made Shibi realize the Academy didn't really do much to make them aware of how powerful that jutsu could be.
Or maybe they had mistaken Noburu's clone jutsu for the insubstantial one. Either or.
Shibi ate his beef fried rice in silence as he watched.
"Alright," Noburu said and clapped his hands for the slide projector to move to the first slide. It showed a topography map of the shore, lake bed, and a bit of the island on the far side. "This is the thinnest spot between the lake and the island. It is advised to cross here, to minimize the chances of being attacked."
Shibi noticed that the topography map included two large cave entrances on the island's side, where the shore was steep.
"As you can see, there are these cave entrances, we don't know how deep they go -- but there is a chance these are meant to feed wells inside the town." Noburu tapped the cave entrances on the slide. "So take care near them, they could have something nasty as a surprise. Questions so far?"
Hiashi raised his hand to be called on.
"Yes you, with sorrowful eyes?" Noburu pointed at him, uncaring about the wave of giggles that followed his jab.
Hiashi scowled, but spoke anyway. "Why do we need to know the topography of this section of the lake?"
"Because you need to know how deep it is." Noburu clapped his hands and the slide changed to display side-views of a spike-shell turtle, grisly pike, and a leech. "Grisly pike typically need a certain depth to move around in -- or they risk beaching themselves. Spike-shell turtles are bottom-dwellers, and they will chase you into shallow water." He tapped the animals on the screen, then circled the leech. "These fuckers are just as able to kill you. They are swimming around inthe shallows. Don't fucks with them."
One of the older genin raised her hand, she was a genjutsu type -- Shibi recognized her from seminars on new techniques. "Alright, that makes sense for the depth. But why do you include stuff like fallen trees and wrecked boats, n'shit?"
"Because Danzo Shimura said the boats were a safe way to cross." Noburu pointed at the boat out on the lake's surface. "But these ones all look identical to that one." He circled three sunken boats, all close together. "Which means either there's something unique about that boat, or, more likely, he's a dirty liar."
Shibi lifted his sunglasses to get a better look at the boats on the slide. They were all identical to the boat on the water.
Shibi's kikaichu bugs reported movement in the genin teams in the trees -- they were relocating, to a position further north. The reason, it seemed, was that a fire country moose was in the area.
He processed that over a couple seconds and almost choked on his fried rice once it clicked.
"Shibi," Noburu paused his presentation on the most viable ways to cross the lake to point his way. "I know the food's good, but it's not 'kill yourself' good. Junko, can you help him out?"
Shibi desperately wanted to get his choking under control before Junko could help him. He'd seen how she 'helped' people. While the energetic Kaguya skipped over, Shibi tried to speak. "Th-hck. Ther--cff!"
Junko grinned malevolently as she placed one hand on Shibi's shoulder, and raised the other as a closed fist. She was facing him from the side, which meant only one thing..
There was no escape, Shibi braced himself. When the blow came, it knocked all the wind out of him Junko's punch to his solar plexus was strong enough to lift him off the ground. The chunk of rice and beef which had blocked Shibi's airway flew out of his mouth and struck Tsume's dog in the face.
While Shibi recovered his air, and Kuromaru ate his sudden treat, Noburu continued the presentation.
"Right -- the best way to cross would be to cross in bubbles." Noburu clapped his hands and the slide changed to indicate them all floating over the water. "Trouble is -- there are Uchiha among us." He glanced at the relevant parties. "And getting y'all into one bubble would require me shrinking you down."
Junko helped support Shibi until he was able to breathe normally. As soon as he was, he spoke up.
"There is a moose nearby," he tried to look impassive as he cleaned rice grains off his face. "It's made the other genin team move."
"Hmm? Oh, yeah, that'd be perfect for a distraction if we cross the river normally." Noburu glanced around, uncaring while the Konoha ninja all seemed visibly concerned. "Everyone who can water-walk, raise your hands."
Shibi and Junko put up their hands, along with virtually everyone else in the meeting -- most of them, hesitant. Except the rookies.
Choza Akimichi shrank down as he noticed they were the only ones without their hands up. Inoichi Yamanaka's face turned red. Shikaku Nara pinched the bridge of his nose.
"Right -- as soon as everyone's eaten up, Junko and Haruki will grab the moose. I'll get you three across as soon as the water's clear for everyone to run." Noburu crossed his arms. "If y'all want our help getting back across the lake, just meet up with us once you've found your stuff. I look forward to seeing you in the next round of the Exams -- single combat."
"Wait," one of the Uchihas called out and pointed dramatically at Noburu. "You did steal intel about the exams!"
"No, your leadership just picks the wrong stuff to guard about the exam. They're always 'intel, survival, combat', in that order." Noburu clapped his hands and a slide shut down. "Now, everyone chow down. Choza, Haruki, and I worked really hard on that food." He pointed at Shibi again. "But don't choke on it! It's not that good!"
--
Legendary Sannin Jiraiya
Ever since the news from the start of the second exam had reached the Hokage Tower, Jiraiya had been a giggly bitch. He could hardly go a few minutes without devolving into giggles. It was a common problem in the Tower, but his case was the worst of all of them.
He had to tell them. Jiraiya wrote down a note in a scroll for a messenger toad to take to Tsunade. It read: 'Tell Raiga his team found out how to legitimately piss Danzo off. I'm laughing myself into an early grave.'
The old geezers, Kotaru, Homura, and Danzo all glared at him as the messenger toad left. The four of them sat in the Hokage's office, with Danzo in the guest seat opposite Sarutobi-sensei's conversation chair, and Jiraiya on the couch opposite Kotaru and Homura on its twin.
"I'm pleased you find humor in the subversion of the exam's intended purpose," Danzo ground out, the picture of composure even as he gripped the arms of his chair with white-knuckle strength. "It means there is some silver lining to this, after all."
"Yeah -- it means this batch of genin we've got has people smart enough to look underneath the underneath." Jiraiya rested his elbow on his knee and used it to hold up his chin. He just looked Danzo's way and giggled every few seconds. "We have genin smart enough to realize the whole world doesn't have to be their enemy. A beautiful thing, that."
"The purpose of the second exam is to test their survival abilities," Kotaru said with a bitter frown. "I don't like it, but cooperation is a valid way to survive. Given we have a war coming closer every day, I'm tempted to fail this whole batch of genin on principle."
Homura arched his eyebrow and turned to look at her. "You think cooperation makes them undeserving of being chunin?"
"I think we ought to try again next year, with more attention to detail on the individual exams." Kotaru crossed her arms and shook her head. "This subversion has made it so we have no idea how they would survive out in the field. Cooperation is valid -- but we need to see how they deal with being on their own."
"The power to pass or fail the genin does not fall squarely on us." Danzo spoke with a flat, emotionless voice while his hands strained to break the arms of his chair off. "Jiraiya, as Jounin Commander and acting Hokage, has two votes. We each have one. And the daimyo must agree with our reasoning."
"Which he won't," Jiraiya added, smug as a pig in shit. "Because he'll hear 'they worked together' and think, like sane people, 'oh wow, that's great'." He grinned, wide and spiteful. "Because, in a war, soldiers who can work with their 'competition' are vital for any alliances we form."
Homura glanced at each of them, and sighed. "I can see all your points. This chunin exam hasn't gone how any of us planned." He adjusted his glasses. "We need troops who can survive hostile conditions, we need troops who can be ruthless in the execution of their missions… but Jiraiya's point rings truest." He avoided Kotaru and Danzo's gaze as they glared at him.
"Konoha's resources are not infinite. We need troops who can at least be civil with forces from other villages who are not in direct warfare with us." Homura finished and met Jiraiya's gaze. "My official vote won't be given until after the third portion of the exam."
Jiraiya grinned just a bit wider as Danzo's right armrest finally snapped. It was so satisfying to see one of the geezers break from Danzo's mind control. "I'm just… trying to burn this into my memory." Jiraiya announced and gestured toward Danzo. "This look of frustration as you've lost this time, old man." Jiraiya took a deep breath, pleased with himself. "It's like the world just became a slightly happier place to be, ya know?"
Danzo glared at him, all pretense of being unemotional gone -- in its place was an expression of keenly focused anger. "You think I've lost, Jiraiya? The exam is still going. Things can change."
"Maybe." Jiraiya shrugged. "But the most important part is you think you've lost." He stuck his tongue out at the elder ninja. "Whatever you're plotting might recover, but you didn't turn these genin into crabs in a bucket, or bloodthirsty monsters."
"We shall see."
--
Genin Fujimoto
Haruki lept through the trees like a chipmunk, blood on his sword and a smirk on his lips. Behind him, a moose barreled through the trees with a bloody gash along its flank, and a spot of blood on the opposite side.
Junko giggled madly as she skipped through the trees faster than Haruki could at a normal run. Blood dripped down from one of her fingers as she glanced back at the enraged creature. "Ooh, it's so mad~"
"Probably used to humans being afraid of it," Haruki called back. They made it to the treeline and jumped. Both of them landed on the ground and bolted for the shore where the rest of the genin were waiting.
Behind them, the moose emerged from the trees with furious cries. Three meters tall, just as long, and with a rack of the same distance from point to point, the moose had a dappled fur of whites and browns, with a long tail that ended in a jagged club of antler-bone. It charged after them, faster than any civilian could run.
The genin were grouped up at the campsite, ready to bolt as soon as the lake was safe. Safe-ish, anyway.
"Ready for the stumble-slam, Junko?"
"Stumble-slam, gotcha!" She gave him the thumbs up and actually deigned to run to gain some distance.
Haruki flicked the blood off his katana, sheathed it, and took a shuriken from his holster. "Fire release: Flaming caltrop." He went to work making handsigns with the shuriken between his hands. When it was done, he dropped it as he ran -- while it began to glow violent orange and white.
The moose was not smart enough spot it, and soon planted its foot right onto the hot metal. A pained howl echoed from the animal as it struggled to resolve the issue of its momentum with the inability to put weight on one of its limbs and ended up skidding until it began to stumble.
As soon as it did, Junko appeared. Grinning like a demon she had run forward and looped around and came right at the animal. Haruki smirked as he passed her, and saw she had her fist raised.
Wham!
Seconds later, she struck the moose right on the skullcap when it had stumbled too severely. All its forward momentum was put to a quick end, and the concussed animal flipped over Junko to crash into the ground with its legs in the air.
With smaller targets, stumble-slam would send them through a wall or eight. It depended on how much time to build momentum Junko got.
The concussed moose was dragged by Haruki and Junko -- mostly Junko -- until they got to the campsite where Noburu could help.
"One!" "Two!" "Three!" "Dinnertime!" The three of them heaved the moose into the air and tossed it right into the lake. The water woke the moose from its concussed state enough for it to realize it was in danger as something began to drag it underwater.
With literal blood in the water, the genin made their break for the island.
The moose's thrashing kept it alive long enough for every spike-shell turtle and grisly pike in the area to want a piece of it.
Twenty-one genin started off from the shore, and other than some slowdowns from attacks from leeches, they all made it. The genin gathered in what had once been a wealthy home, multiple buildings with a courtyard and a moon gate to an overgrown garden.
Incomplete human remains were present in both the buildings and courtyard. Faded bloodstains indicated people were dragged out of the broken double-doors to the estate. Only the garden was safe, with claw marks on the moon gate and the only intact remains therein.
Haruki heated up a kunai and helped Noburu peel off the leeches that had latched onto some genin, then assisted in bandaging the wounds. While the genin used what earth-release techniques they knew to block off the broken gate, Junko collected the bodies for a burning pile.
"Right." Noburu announced once everyone was patched up. "Be on the lookout for any spike-shell turtles that are wandering town looking for food. I ain't your boss, but this place is going to be pretty safe from them with that barrier you got up."
Haruki didn't say anything about the shoddy craftsmanship on the barrier. It fractured the surrounding wall because they couldn't make it fit snugly. He very pointedly kept his mouth shut on that issue.
"Good hunting everyone -- smoke if you got 'em, get to work if you don't!"
Most of the genin teams jumped to the tiled rooftops and slipped off into the night to find quiet spots to check their scrolls. Hizashi and Hiashi's teams remained, however.
Noburu reached into his hoodie pocket and pulled out doll-sized rookie genin one at a time. "You guys have a good trip?"
Choza, the size of a mouse, held up a corn kernel. "This is great!" His voice was adorably squeaky. "I can make this last so much longer than normal!"
"Get us back to normal, pronto!" Inoichi, his voice just as squeaky, roared with fury. "And wash that hoodie more -- there's lint in the pocket!" He pointed dramatically, angry beyond all reason.
"Meh," tiny little Shikaku shrugged. "Was really warm, at least."
"Reduction ninjutsu, release!" Noburu made a handsign, and the three genin vanished in puffs of smoke.
When it cleared, the three genin were their proper sizes. And almost immediately, they started shivering.
"Oh Guanyin's unlying hips," Haruki muttered and reached into his robes. "Here." He grabbed a scroll from a hidden holster, opened it, and drew blood across the seals inside. Three fluffy fur-lined hoodies, all plus-sized, emerged and were roughly tossed at the genin. "I can't stand watching you three look pathetic, take these and tell no one where you got them."
The rookies were too cold to argue the point, and hastily put on the hoodies. Given their oversized nature, even Choza's went down past his knees.
"Oh spirits, this is so warm," Shikaku said with only his lower jaw visible under the hood.
Kushina and Junko were giggling like mad as the rookies jumped away.
"Those were all made in Moon Country style," Hiashi noted with an arched eyebrow. "Those… had to be expensive."
"Yes. They were. But they're meant to help people survive Snow Country, so they'll keep them alive." Haruki crossed his arms and scoffed.
"I thought you former Kiri ninja were all killing machines," Tsume muttered, disappointed. "But you're a softie." Kuromaru barked once in agreement.
"I suppose you squirrel-people would know, being the softest ninjas on the continent." Haruki glared. "But… at least they won't freeze out there."
Hiashi's team bounded off for the rooftops shortly after that, with their Hyuga team member lagging behind.
"We'll be fine, Lord Hiashi," Hizashi said with a forced respectful tone. "We know they're there, and we can deal with them."
Haruki narrowed his eyes at Hizashi, but said nothing to contradict his friend's words. Once Hiashi left, hesitantly, Haruki voiced his question. "Something we should know?"
"The tree ninja crossed the lake at the same time as us." Hizashi tilted his head ever-so-slightly toward the garden. "Shibi's kikaichu tipped us off."
Ah. They had guests in their new home. Haruki glanced at Kushina and saw chains of chakra grow from her hands to wrap around her fingers like knuckle-dusters. He glanced at Shibi and saw the teen's bugs crawling down his legs in visible lines. Junko laid her hand gently on Nuibari's hilt. A flash of gold precipitated Noburu's teeth visibly sharpening.
Haruki took a deep breath and exhaled a cloud of steam. "Alright." He leaned his head to and fro, popping his neck. "Shall we?"
"Junko," Noburu sing-songed. "It's your turn~"
Junko smiled, and flicked her wrist casually. Nuibari flew silently, the bandages left behind, and pierced through the garden wall. A pained cry echoed, and prompted the two genin teams to scatter as their enemies did as well.
Haruki found an opponent with red eyes filled with spinning tomoe. An older teen dressed in black clothes in a similar tasteful asymmetrical design to his own wardrobe. The Uchiha had a blunt-tipped tanto in one hand, and a trio of smokebombs in the other.
They found each other on the railing of the second floor balcony to the estate's main house. The third floor had collapsed on the second, and left nothing but splintered wood and trapped corpses besides the balcony.
Haruki's katana came out for the second time that night, as the two sized each other up. He noticed that the Uchiha's eyes only had two tomoe, and smirked to himself. Without the third, he wouldn't be able to outpace Haruki.
"Would asking for your surrender do anything?" Haruki asked, to which the Uchiha pulled his arm back. "Guess not."
While the Uchiha threw the smokebombs, Haruki molded chakra and formed a handsign with his free hand.
"Water release: Hidden mist jutsu!"
A cloud of thick white mist pushed the black smoke out of the way, while two plumes of similar mist went up from Noburu and Junko's positions, presumably. While the air rang out with clashes of steel, coral, and chain, Haruki closed his eyes and focused.
The Uchiha he fought was fast -- but Haruki was a sensor and trained in silent killing. He silently went from the railing to the balcony itself, and swiped his katana at the Uchiha who had tried to swipe his last known position. The alleged genin managed to use his forward momentum to dodge, however.
Haruki and the Uchiha danced like that for a while, in the thick mists. Move, dodge, attack. Sometimes the Uchiha would dare attack Haruki with fire jutsu -- which Haruki would return in kind.
It was all too easy.
"Haruki!" Someone was shouting at him, but he wast distracted by a fireball that came way too close.
But why did he feel so cold?
Haruki swung his sword and came so close to getting the Uchiha -- but the Konoha ninja was able to slip into the mist. He hadn't worked up much of a sweat, but he felt so tired. Something didn't add up.
"Haruki, no!"
He couldn't move, he realized. The Uchiha didn't move either. But Haruki couldn't move. His limbs didn't respond.
A spike of killing intent so dire Haruki momentarily thought Orochimaru had arrived precipitated a roar. Kushina, deep lines on her face and her eyes bloody read, with her teeth all replaced with shearing teeth, jumped up to the balcony with a bloody haze in her wake. She swiped at the thin air and chased after something which wasn't there.
"Noburu, get over there!"
And Haruki still couldn't move. He didn't understand why he was so cold. It was like he was trapped in the middle of a swing at the Uchiha -- who was also trapped.
Haruki suddenly pieced together what could have happened, and flexed his chakra. "Kai." Like a puff of smoke, the Uchiha vanished and was replaced with a section of balcony where his katana was embedded.
He was slumped against the corner of the balcony -- there was so much blood all over his clothes and the wood. He'd been in a genjutsu. He still couldn't move, and it became hard to see.
He made out vaguely cow-patterned arms in his diminishing field of vision, and some residual warmth. But it all seemed like it was far away.
He was dying.
His limited field of view changed so that he saw a byakugan eye through shutter-shades. His adopted brother. The one who told him the name of the game for the afterlife was reincarnation. That made Haruki smile. He'd see them again.
He wasn't afraid, even as the building shook, and faint roars echoed.
Noburu was trying to put something in Haruki's mouth, a little pebble it felt like. Haruki didn't fight it, but it didn't seem to do much.
Really, the only thing he regretted was that he wouldn't get to thank Akami for being such a good mom in the three years he'd known her. She'd been better than either of Haruki's original parents. Raiga-sensei and Sayaka would understand. It came with their line of work.
He wasn't cold anymore. But it was very dark.
And then there was nothing.
---
Howdy y'all, ten internet cookies if y'all can tell me what is the one thing you don't do when fighting someone with the sharingan. The absolute most important thing you don't ever do.
…
Did you say 'make eye contact'?! Yay! You win ten internet cookies! Collect them at your local Cookie Express.
Medical ninjutsu can fix a lot of things -- but there is a point where a body loses so much blood that it can't survive long enough to receive a transfusion. And that's assuming that you have blood to transfuse. Not even a blood pill can fix it. Not even the Legendary Sannin Tsunade can fix it.
RIP Haruki Fujimoto, beloved son and brother, gone too soon.
- Location
- United States
- Pronouns
- He/Him
WELL. That's a pickle; there's sure to be some lovely friction between Oto and Danzo and the Uchiha. I hope they're forward thinking enough to cut off the heads/tongues for proof.
Edit: actually, I just realized that they might all be disqualified according to the rules. "If a teammate can't move for 24 hours, you're disqualified." Well, he's kinda dead.
Edit: actually, I just realized that they might all be disqualified according to the rules. "If a teammate can't move for 24 hours, you're disqualified." Well, he's kinda dead.
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Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
So, full disclosure. Next chapter will be the last one before I shift to another story for some updates, probably Citrus Punk because I'm feeling tropical.
But.
Haruki dying here, in this way, has done what I wanted it to do. A poll is currently going on in my discord for twenty-four hours for what do with him going forward. This is my weekend off(ish), so I'll be writing up a storm. Normally, I do no-context polls when I'm at a crossroads, but this one is full-context. As a treat.
But.
Haruki dying here, in this way, has done what I wanted it to do. A poll is currently going on in my discord for twenty-four hours for what do with him going forward. This is my weekend off(ish), so I'll be writing up a storm. Normally, I do no-context polls when I'm at a crossroads, but this one is full-context. As a treat.
Ch 60
Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Chapter 60: Breaking Point
---
Rebellious Monk Kousuke
Something had happened. Kousuke had been in the midst of meditation in the Wave Temple with his disciples, and all the candles in the room blew out from a sudden gust. A deep, foreboding cold filled the room -- killing intent.
Kousuke immediately began to survey their environments for the foe that had come upon them. He expected someone from Kumo, or Nadeshiko, or perhaps Kiri remnants. But there was no one there. The killing intent didn't stop.
Killing intent could make one feel cold, but it didn't actually sap the heat from someone. At least, not normally. So when Kousuke saw his breath puff in the air, illuminated by moonlight through the windows, he was worried.
'Has the Two-Faced Dragon grown tired of being dead?' He wondered, and stood with his staff at the ready.
He saw nothing but confused and scared disciples, in the midst of being calmed by their elders. He felt nothing but the oppressive desire to inflict harm. Rumblings within his deactivated seal told him even Saiken could feel it.
'Kousuke,' Saiken called out from the seal. 'I think something's happened. Isobu's back, and Kurama's actually afraid of something and willing to admit it.'
That made Kousuke freeze in place. "Noburu…." He realized immediately what was happening. 'Saiken, what's happening?'
He could feel the great spirit slosh around in his cave. 'Isobu is… asking us all for some chakra. A loan, he says, that he'll pay back if we ever need it. I don't know why he's asking it, but he's asking it of all of us.'
"Remain calm, try and center yourselves." Kousuke called out to the other monks in the dark. "Treat this like a distraction, put it from your mind." In an effort to help calm them, he resumed his meditative pose on the floor. One by one, they followed his example.
As easily as breathing, Kousuke slipped into Saiken's seal. From there, the slug spirit was able to ferry them to the void where the bijuu would speak with each other. For once, it was crowded.
In the three years Kousuke had even known about the meeting space, he had only ever seen one bijuu there at any given time. Suddenly, there were three.
Kurama, spirit of karma, taller than any mountain ever seen, loomed with their ears pinned back and their tails tightly coiled behind them. Their jinchuuriki Kushina stood on the illuminated disk between the three bijuu. She was obviously frightened, but had nowhere to go.
Isobu, spirit of the sea, laid low to the ground. His shrimp tails were listless on the ground, like he was exhausted. In the distance, there was Noburu. He seemed to have his attention focused solely on Isobu, with his back to the rest of them.
The killing intent Kousuke had experienced in the physical world was nothing compared to its intensity in the void. The crushing depths of the ocean had less pressure than the palpable weight of killing intent projected by Noburu.
Saiken, spirit of transition, and artisan of ephemeral beauty, coiled one of his goey tails around Kousuke protectively. He braved the disk himself to offer Kousuke protection -- which made the monk raise an eyebrow.
"I can't very well say something to him if you block me off," Kousuke chided the great spirit.
"Maybe you shouldn't talk to him at all, yeah?" Saiken's eyestalks wiggled as he visibly strained under the weight of killing intent. "Looking at it now, Kurama has this handled."
"If you leave, it will take centuries to fix what I do to you," Kurama threatened with a side eye and tremors visible in their tails. "Girl-meat, you and the monk-meat talk to the… boy." Kurama's mighty hand, bigger than most villages in its own right, swiped the floor of the void to smack Kushina into Noburu's direction.
With Kushina forced, and Kousuke actively seeking freedom, the nine and six-tails jinchuuriki went to speak with the three-tails jinchuuriki.
As soon as they got close enough, Kousuke could see there was something visibly wrong with Noburu. His vitiligo spots had begun to move across his skin right before their eyes, his hair had grown long again, and he seemed to spasm -- like a distorted photograph -- every few seconds.
Kousuke glanced at Kushina, and stepped closer to her. He had an easier time navigating the overwhelming killing intent than she, and his proxmity made her able to move slightly easier.
"Kousuke, Kushina." Noburu's voice had dropped in pitch unnaturally low. It was something unearthly that rattled Kousuke's bones to hear. "Could I ask you to loan me some bijuu chakra?" Noburu looked over his shoulder at them, his eyes dark hazy globs. "Isobu needs a break, and I kinda need more."
Kushina took a step behind Kousuke, quite unlike the 'habenro' girl. "Um. Can… can you fix Haruki with it?"
"Maybe." The strange thing which resembled Noburu fully turned to them and shrugged. "I'm going to try. But even if it doesn't, I'd like to deliver a bijuudama directly to Danzo's face, if possible."
Kousuke glanced between the two teenagers with his brow furrowed. "Something's happened." He gestured with his staff at Noburu. "I can feel your killing intent all the way from Wave. That's not supposed to be possible."
"I'm kind of getting sick of old men like Ryukotsusei, Madara, Hiruzen, and Danzo making this world a shitty place to live." Noburu crossed his arms, like he wasn't in the process of becoming an unstable abomination. "A mild case of explosive dismemberment will be good for Danzo. Air out the humors, all that."
"We were doing the chunin exams," Kushina explained. "Haruki… got hurt. And, it looks like he might be… dead." She whispered the last word. Like she expected Noburu to fly off the handle.
Kousuke sighed, and walked closer to Noburu. "So… someone you cared about dies, and you want to throw a glorified tantrum?"
Noburu tilted his head. "You think this is the first time I've had someone I care about die on me, Kousuke?" His body began to twist -- he grew taller right before Kousuke's eyes. A white milky substance began to leak from his mouth and move against gravity -- over his face. "What's got me boiling is that -- it was all so stupidly petty. They killed Haruki for the jars of Saiken's syrup he had on him."
That made Kousuke wince, as he knew Saiken would, at hearing that.
"Danzo's goon tried so hard to get away with those syrups. Time in here is real slow, but -- spoiler warning for when you're out of your blood rage, Kushina? He didn't outrun you."
Kushina winced.
"You're going to be picking pieces of Uchiha out of your teeth for months. Welcome to the cannibal crew." Noburu's face began to be covered by the white milky substance -- it appeared to grow into a mask designed to accommodate a wildly different face. "Once they got those syrups -- they all backed off and tried to run. We had a jutsu Danzo wanted, and that was enough to kill an ally for. Not acceptable."
"Noburu… there… is something growing on your face." Kousuke pointed at it, and advanced on Noburu to inspect the substance.
Noburu didn't resist as his face was poked. "That happens sometimes, don't worry about it." He seemed unconcerned as a mass of bone-white tendrils grew over his eyes with a knife-like horn growing from his forehead. "Back to the issue at hand -- can I borrow some chakra or not?"
"Noburu," Kousuke chided with a tap to the hardened tendrils over his face. "This is something worrying, because it looks like those masks you told me wayward spirits wore in another life." Samsara was supposed to keep such things separate, but Noburu was a former Buddha -- if he pushed hard on the barriers between worlds, would they buckle?
"If it's any consolation, this is only happening in here."
"It's not." Kousuke sat down and patted the ground next to him for Kushina to sit. "So… how about we talk about this? Time doesn't pass nearly as fast out there as in here. And, if we can convince you to drop the continent-wide killing intent aura, we can get you that chakra."
"Um. Yeah." Kushina sat down next to Kousuke and uneasily signaled for Noburu to join them. "Why… don't we start with… with, um. How you feel about the situation?" She shrugged and glanced Kousuke's way to ensure it was fine.
Kousuke patted her on the shoulder and smiled.
After a couple of seconds, Noburu sat down with them. The white milky substance had stopped flowing from his mouth. "I suppose I'm feeling fed up with nobody killing Danzo…."
--
Kongo of Hardened Stone
Deep beneath the earth of Wave Country, in long-cooled volcanic caves, the mightiest of the elemental Genryu remained still. Through the secret ways of gods, he remained in contact with those of his brothers still awake.
The world outside their holy mountain was in desperate need of balance, too much for them to balance alone. Even if they could wake their sleeping siblings, a difficult task itself, there would be too much work for all ten of them to manage. They had to focus on blessing their new home, and hope one day the sleeping gods would wake.
Suiko, Kongo's aquatic little brother, labored to build strands of trust from Otogakure to the established villages in their new holy land -- Wave Country.
Rekka, their emotional center, wove kindness into the body of Wave's lone volcano -- from the volcano, into the rich soil it provided, then into the life of the island.
Korin, most holy of the Genryu, worked to inspire in mortals a desire to know the divine -- to seek spirituality, to find joy in art.
Tenku, the only flying Genryu left awake, breathed motes of wisdom into the water droplets that would fall onto Wave as rain and snow.
And Kongo, arbiter of justice, waited until he was needed. Mortals often did not find the godly concept of justice palatbable in their everyday lives, so he reserved his intervention when it was necessary.
It came all too soon.
Through the bond they'd swore, all those who carried the crest of Otogakure into the wider world were their eyes and ears. In exchange, they were protected by the Genryu spiritually. Through this, Kongo witnessed foul murder as a result of simple greed. Worse, foul murder from a supposed ally.
When a wave of deadly intent reached from the continent's interior all the way to their island, Kongo knew he had to act. He had to bring the hammer of justice upon the matter.
Kongo stirred in the depths of the earth, and reached out along the bond they shared with their distant ninja.
He didn't go for pomp or ceremony in his first administration of justice in years. Betrayal, foul murder, all for greed had to be punished. And Konoha, who had allowed it to happen, would face justice.
Kongo spoke to the earth around Konoha, heated by volcanic activity from below. The stones shifted, they moved water from deep aquifers along paths Kongo instructed. From their mighty Hokage Monument, bursts of boiling hot water would erupt. One of their carvings was damaged, but Kongo didn't care which human face belonged to whom.
Kongo spoke to the earth, and the soil loosened their grips on trees. Every tree within Konoha's walls and for twelve kilometers in every direction went tumbling down. And if those trees landed on the ground -- Kongo bade the earth to swallow them up. Konoha would make due with bamboo, or not at all.
And lastly, Kongo reached out to the cankers from which the tragedy had spawned. Danzo Shimura, whose greed had brought dire need of justice, and Hiruzen Sarutobi who had enabled that same greed. Hunger and inaction had brought this on their people.
Humanity had lived in a world where they did not face the god's judgement for so long they forgot it. Kongo would remind them. Unending hunger for Danzo Shimura, and paralysis for Hiruzen Sarutobi.
Justice was done.
--
Genin Uzumaki
It took a long, long time in the seal to talk Noburu out of emitting so much killing intent the whole continent felt it.
She wouldn't have been surprised if people on the sub-continent as far out as Bird Country had felt it.
But eventually, Noburu calmed down. The white stuff broke off his face, and he stopped talking weird. Once he was normal again, Kousuke and Kushina both acted as transfers for their bijuu's chakra to Noburu.
Kushina was glad it was over -- but had no intention of forgetting that it had happened. Noburu had scared the fox. The nine-tailed fox spirit of karma, taller than mountains and more destructive than any hurricane, had been afraid.
She emerged from the void where the bijuu could talk to the cold autumn night, mere minutes after she had first been summoned. Her heart was beating hard in her chest, her hands and forearms were covered in blood, and she had an entire human corpse hanging from her jaws by the neck. She was on all fours, her chakra chains had dispelled at some point.
Her eyes were fixed on one of the rookie genin -- Choza Akimichi, who watched her from below with terror in his eyes and on his face. He was on the street, Kushina realized. She was on the roof of a wall around an estate -- a tile shifted under her hand when she moved around.
She spat the human out, and wondered why the taste of human meat hadn't been unpleasant. It didn't taste good, but she knew she should have been repulsed by having a human's throat in her mouth. And she hadn't been.
"What are you looking at?" Kushina growled without meaning too. Leftover scraps of the fox's chakra in her system deepened her voice. The more she breathed, the more her seal reabsorbed the bijuu's chakra. She felt her teeth return to normal, and naturally moved to stand on her feet again. "It's dangerous out here. You should stay with your team, rookie."
Choza nodded and steadily backed away. Once he was sure he wasn't going to be attacked, the rookie turn and ran as fast as he could.
Kushina looked down on the corpse she'd had in her mouth -- an Uchiha. An older teen, maybe eighteen or nineteen. He'd been torn to shreds, like he'd been mauled by a bear. She looked around -- and something seemed off. She'd seen a couple trees in and around the island -- but they'd all fallen over. A couple, near the shore, were gone entirely. She narrowed her eyes to see further, and the treelines along the south, east, and west of the island were all gone too. Only the northern treeline remained.
Several estates over, there was an ominous multi-colored glow.
She hauled the dead Uchiha up and jumped from rooftop to rooftop back toward where the fight had started.
More corpses littered the courtyard -- one was stitched to the wall with most of their torso open and emptied out, another was dead without any blows whatsoever, Kushina's original victim had a broken neck, one was covered in a swarm of bugs, and the last was impaled through the forehead by a coral spike.
The source of the multi-colored glow was Noburu, surrounded by their friends on the second floor of the estate's main house.
Kushina dropped the corpse, and joined them. Right away, Hizashi and Shibi approached her only to stop when they saw all the blood.
It didn't stop Junko, though. Junko walked right between the squeamish boys to bind Kushina in a bone-crushing hug. "You did so well," Junko whispered to her while Kushina choked for air. "Used your chains to break that arrogant girl's neck, and chased down the last one who thought he could escape. All your training paid off -- I'm so proud of you."
Kushina was allowed to take a gasping breath once Junko ended the hug.
She held Kushina at arm's length, beaming. "If you were a Kaguya, you would be considered an adult now. All grown up! Able to choose whom you marry, if anyone, and honored with a wind chime made from your victim's bones." She didn't seem to care about the blood all over her clothes and hair from Kushina's flailing.
Kushina still hadn't fully caught her breath from the strength of the hug. "Aw… J-unko that's… I don't know what to say."
"I don't think they'll let us make a wind chime from their bones, Konoha ninja are weirdos." Junko glanced at Kushina's teammates, then beamed at Kushina again. "But! When you come to visit us, I'll make sure you get a seat at the grown-up's table."
Junko seemed… so perky, even though Haruki was dead not three meters away. She followed Kushina's glances, and rolled her eyes.
"Oh -- don't be silly. We're ninja." Junko tilted her head, and let Kushina go so she could put her hands on her hips. "We kill people all the time -- that sort of thing happens." She gestured at Noburu and Haruki with a flippant flick of her hand, and stuck her tongue out. "Besides -- Noburu's fixing him up."
Kushina looked at Shibi and Hizashi, confused. The boys didn't give her a lot of confidence when they avoided her gaze.
She looked at Noburu, and saw him working fast with a clone of his on Haruki's other side. The clone formed a handsign and vanished in smoke. Then another clone would appear and do the same. Over, and over, and over.
"He is having his clones transform into blood," Hizashi explained. "I… don't know how he's managing it, but I saw with my byakugan that Haruki's blood is increasing. The wound in his neck is gone, too." He looked wary, like he was afraid to approach his cousin. "But… Haruki should be conscious now, if that's all it took."
"Noburu said something about the Shinigami just before you arrived," Shibi added. "I couldn't catch it, unfortunately."
Kushina remembered the shrine to the Shinigami back in Uzushio -- the great horned god of death, reaper of souls.
Kushina approached Noburu slowly, she paused every time she caught a glimpse of the fox's bloody red chakra, then resumed shortly afterward. "Noburu?"
He turned to look at her -- his byakugan active, but had changed. No more were they two lavender disks in his eyes -- they had been replaced with gold. "Sup?" There was something in his hoodie pocket, perhaps a ninja rodent.
His casual air disturbed Kushina almost as much as the crushing killing intent he'd loosed earlier had.
"Um…. Are you going to be able… to get Haruki back?"
"Probably. Just need to get this done before the Shinigami shows up." He turned back to Haruki's pallid body. "Gave him a blood pill -- with these clones acting as stop gap, that'll have time to kick in." His hands were in the sign for making shadow clones -- not the magical hand technique.
Kushina saw something in the pocket of Noburu's hoodie. Not a ninja rodent, like she'd thought, but the hilt to a tanto. One of the ones from the genin teams?
"And -- if the Shinigami comes by before I'm ready -- I fight him." Noburu shifted his weight, and the hilt vanished deeper into his hoodie pocket. "With a weapon that can harm spiritual beings."
Something about that didn't sit right with her. Fighting the Shinigami was always seen as foolish -- death would win. But… what if Noburu won? What would happen?
And how did Noburu get a weapon that could harm death?
"Noburu -- what happened to your byakugan, and where did you get that tanto?"
"In order of asking," Noburu answered briskly. "I dunno. After you and Kousuke joined the others in loaning me some chakra, they turned into this." He tapped his face with his hands, still in the handsign. The flow of clones into Haruki hadn't stopped or slowed. "And the tanto isn't a tanto. It's something called a zanpakutou."
Noburu smiled, happy despite the circumstances.
"He was always there. I just… forgot how to reach out and grab him -- to make him real. This whole experience made me remember." One of Noburu's eyebrows arched. "Dunno if the poison ability will work here -- not a lot of reishi. But if the Shinigami knows what's good for him, he won't make me find out."
Kushina felt the same dread as when Noburu had projected killing intent across an entire continent. He was contemplating fighting the god of death -- and winning. A normal person would assume hubris -- but Kushina wondered if it was something different.
Absent anything else she could do that wouldn't make the situation worse -- Kushina knelt down and began to pray.
'Don't fight, O Death. Let this soul return -- lest all souls be put at risk.'
---
Not a full Bleach crossover, mind. Just reincarnation chicanery. Let's hope Shinigami bitches his face off before he sees the shikai.
Anyway, say hello to the reason for Haruki getting Yamcha'd in the first place. The equivalent to the mangekyou sharingan -- the kaibyakugan.
Glossary:
Kaibyakugan: An evolution of the base byakugan brought about by intense emotional distress in a person with massive chakra. Often, the chakra needed to make the transition is comparable to a jinchuuriki, or requires external absorption. The kaibyakugan summons a past life of the user, and fuses them to their present incarnation. This can result in physical changes, additional skillsets, or unique powers manifesting. Unlike the mangekyou sharingan, the kaibyakugan does not damage the eyes of the user, but it also cannot be deactivated without death.
---
Rebellious Monk Kousuke
Something had happened. Kousuke had been in the midst of meditation in the Wave Temple with his disciples, and all the candles in the room blew out from a sudden gust. A deep, foreboding cold filled the room -- killing intent.
Kousuke immediately began to survey their environments for the foe that had come upon them. He expected someone from Kumo, or Nadeshiko, or perhaps Kiri remnants. But there was no one there. The killing intent didn't stop.
Killing intent could make one feel cold, but it didn't actually sap the heat from someone. At least, not normally. So when Kousuke saw his breath puff in the air, illuminated by moonlight through the windows, he was worried.
'Has the Two-Faced Dragon grown tired of being dead?' He wondered, and stood with his staff at the ready.
He saw nothing but confused and scared disciples, in the midst of being calmed by their elders. He felt nothing but the oppressive desire to inflict harm. Rumblings within his deactivated seal told him even Saiken could feel it.
'Kousuke,' Saiken called out from the seal. 'I think something's happened. Isobu's back, and Kurama's actually afraid of something and willing to admit it.'
That made Kousuke freeze in place. "Noburu…." He realized immediately what was happening. 'Saiken, what's happening?'
He could feel the great spirit slosh around in his cave. 'Isobu is… asking us all for some chakra. A loan, he says, that he'll pay back if we ever need it. I don't know why he's asking it, but he's asking it of all of us.'
"Remain calm, try and center yourselves." Kousuke called out to the other monks in the dark. "Treat this like a distraction, put it from your mind." In an effort to help calm them, he resumed his meditative pose on the floor. One by one, they followed his example.
As easily as breathing, Kousuke slipped into Saiken's seal. From there, the slug spirit was able to ferry them to the void where the bijuu would speak with each other. For once, it was crowded.
In the three years Kousuke had even known about the meeting space, he had only ever seen one bijuu there at any given time. Suddenly, there were three.
Kurama, spirit of karma, taller than any mountain ever seen, loomed with their ears pinned back and their tails tightly coiled behind them. Their jinchuuriki Kushina stood on the illuminated disk between the three bijuu. She was obviously frightened, but had nowhere to go.
Isobu, spirit of the sea, laid low to the ground. His shrimp tails were listless on the ground, like he was exhausted. In the distance, there was Noburu. He seemed to have his attention focused solely on Isobu, with his back to the rest of them.
The killing intent Kousuke had experienced in the physical world was nothing compared to its intensity in the void. The crushing depths of the ocean had less pressure than the palpable weight of killing intent projected by Noburu.
Saiken, spirit of transition, and artisan of ephemeral beauty, coiled one of his goey tails around Kousuke protectively. He braved the disk himself to offer Kousuke protection -- which made the monk raise an eyebrow.
"I can't very well say something to him if you block me off," Kousuke chided the great spirit.
"Maybe you shouldn't talk to him at all, yeah?" Saiken's eyestalks wiggled as he visibly strained under the weight of killing intent. "Looking at it now, Kurama has this handled."
"If you leave, it will take centuries to fix what I do to you," Kurama threatened with a side eye and tremors visible in their tails. "Girl-meat, you and the monk-meat talk to the… boy." Kurama's mighty hand, bigger than most villages in its own right, swiped the floor of the void to smack Kushina into Noburu's direction.
With Kushina forced, and Kousuke actively seeking freedom, the nine and six-tails jinchuuriki went to speak with the three-tails jinchuuriki.
As soon as they got close enough, Kousuke could see there was something visibly wrong with Noburu. His vitiligo spots had begun to move across his skin right before their eyes, his hair had grown long again, and he seemed to spasm -- like a distorted photograph -- every few seconds.
Kousuke glanced at Kushina, and stepped closer to her. He had an easier time navigating the overwhelming killing intent than she, and his proxmity made her able to move slightly easier.
"Kousuke, Kushina." Noburu's voice had dropped in pitch unnaturally low. It was something unearthly that rattled Kousuke's bones to hear. "Could I ask you to loan me some bijuu chakra?" Noburu looked over his shoulder at them, his eyes dark hazy globs. "Isobu needs a break, and I kinda need more."
Kushina took a step behind Kousuke, quite unlike the 'habenro' girl. "Um. Can… can you fix Haruki with it?"
"Maybe." The strange thing which resembled Noburu fully turned to them and shrugged. "I'm going to try. But even if it doesn't, I'd like to deliver a bijuudama directly to Danzo's face, if possible."
Kousuke glanced between the two teenagers with his brow furrowed. "Something's happened." He gestured with his staff at Noburu. "I can feel your killing intent all the way from Wave. That's not supposed to be possible."
"I'm kind of getting sick of old men like Ryukotsusei, Madara, Hiruzen, and Danzo making this world a shitty place to live." Noburu crossed his arms, like he wasn't in the process of becoming an unstable abomination. "A mild case of explosive dismemberment will be good for Danzo. Air out the humors, all that."
"We were doing the chunin exams," Kushina explained. "Haruki… got hurt. And, it looks like he might be… dead." She whispered the last word. Like she expected Noburu to fly off the handle.
Kousuke sighed, and walked closer to Noburu. "So… someone you cared about dies, and you want to throw a glorified tantrum?"
Noburu tilted his head. "You think this is the first time I've had someone I care about die on me, Kousuke?" His body began to twist -- he grew taller right before Kousuke's eyes. A white milky substance began to leak from his mouth and move against gravity -- over his face. "What's got me boiling is that -- it was all so stupidly petty. They killed Haruki for the jars of Saiken's syrup he had on him."
That made Kousuke wince, as he knew Saiken would, at hearing that.
"Danzo's goon tried so hard to get away with those syrups. Time in here is real slow, but -- spoiler warning for when you're out of your blood rage, Kushina? He didn't outrun you."
Kushina winced.
"You're going to be picking pieces of Uchiha out of your teeth for months. Welcome to the cannibal crew." Noburu's face began to be covered by the white milky substance -- it appeared to grow into a mask designed to accommodate a wildly different face. "Once they got those syrups -- they all backed off and tried to run. We had a jutsu Danzo wanted, and that was enough to kill an ally for. Not acceptable."
"Noburu… there… is something growing on your face." Kousuke pointed at it, and advanced on Noburu to inspect the substance.
Noburu didn't resist as his face was poked. "That happens sometimes, don't worry about it." He seemed unconcerned as a mass of bone-white tendrils grew over his eyes with a knife-like horn growing from his forehead. "Back to the issue at hand -- can I borrow some chakra or not?"
"Noburu," Kousuke chided with a tap to the hardened tendrils over his face. "This is something worrying, because it looks like those masks you told me wayward spirits wore in another life." Samsara was supposed to keep such things separate, but Noburu was a former Buddha -- if he pushed hard on the barriers between worlds, would they buckle?
"If it's any consolation, this is only happening in here."
"It's not." Kousuke sat down and patted the ground next to him for Kushina to sit. "So… how about we talk about this? Time doesn't pass nearly as fast out there as in here. And, if we can convince you to drop the continent-wide killing intent aura, we can get you that chakra."
"Um. Yeah." Kushina sat down next to Kousuke and uneasily signaled for Noburu to join them. "Why… don't we start with… with, um. How you feel about the situation?" She shrugged and glanced Kousuke's way to ensure it was fine.
Kousuke patted her on the shoulder and smiled.
After a couple of seconds, Noburu sat down with them. The white milky substance had stopped flowing from his mouth. "I suppose I'm feeling fed up with nobody killing Danzo…."
--
Kongo of Hardened Stone
Deep beneath the earth of Wave Country, in long-cooled volcanic caves, the mightiest of the elemental Genryu remained still. Through the secret ways of gods, he remained in contact with those of his brothers still awake.
The world outside their holy mountain was in desperate need of balance, too much for them to balance alone. Even if they could wake their sleeping siblings, a difficult task itself, there would be too much work for all ten of them to manage. They had to focus on blessing their new home, and hope one day the sleeping gods would wake.
Suiko, Kongo's aquatic little brother, labored to build strands of trust from Otogakure to the established villages in their new holy land -- Wave Country.
Rekka, their emotional center, wove kindness into the body of Wave's lone volcano -- from the volcano, into the rich soil it provided, then into the life of the island.
Korin, most holy of the Genryu, worked to inspire in mortals a desire to know the divine -- to seek spirituality, to find joy in art.
Tenku, the only flying Genryu left awake, breathed motes of wisdom into the water droplets that would fall onto Wave as rain and snow.
And Kongo, arbiter of justice, waited until he was needed. Mortals often did not find the godly concept of justice palatbable in their everyday lives, so he reserved his intervention when it was necessary.
It came all too soon.
Through the bond they'd swore, all those who carried the crest of Otogakure into the wider world were their eyes and ears. In exchange, they were protected by the Genryu spiritually. Through this, Kongo witnessed foul murder as a result of simple greed. Worse, foul murder from a supposed ally.
When a wave of deadly intent reached from the continent's interior all the way to their island, Kongo knew he had to act. He had to bring the hammer of justice upon the matter.
Kongo stirred in the depths of the earth, and reached out along the bond they shared with their distant ninja.
He didn't go for pomp or ceremony in his first administration of justice in years. Betrayal, foul murder, all for greed had to be punished. And Konoha, who had allowed it to happen, would face justice.
Kongo spoke to the earth around Konoha, heated by volcanic activity from below. The stones shifted, they moved water from deep aquifers along paths Kongo instructed. From their mighty Hokage Monument, bursts of boiling hot water would erupt. One of their carvings was damaged, but Kongo didn't care which human face belonged to whom.
Kongo spoke to the earth, and the soil loosened their grips on trees. Every tree within Konoha's walls and for twelve kilometers in every direction went tumbling down. And if those trees landed on the ground -- Kongo bade the earth to swallow them up. Konoha would make due with bamboo, or not at all.
And lastly, Kongo reached out to the cankers from which the tragedy had spawned. Danzo Shimura, whose greed had brought dire need of justice, and Hiruzen Sarutobi who had enabled that same greed. Hunger and inaction had brought this on their people.
Humanity had lived in a world where they did not face the god's judgement for so long they forgot it. Kongo would remind them. Unending hunger for Danzo Shimura, and paralysis for Hiruzen Sarutobi.
Justice was done.
--
Genin Uzumaki
It took a long, long time in the seal to talk Noburu out of emitting so much killing intent the whole continent felt it.
She wouldn't have been surprised if people on the sub-continent as far out as Bird Country had felt it.
But eventually, Noburu calmed down. The white stuff broke off his face, and he stopped talking weird. Once he was normal again, Kousuke and Kushina both acted as transfers for their bijuu's chakra to Noburu.
Kushina was glad it was over -- but had no intention of forgetting that it had happened. Noburu had scared the fox. The nine-tailed fox spirit of karma, taller than mountains and more destructive than any hurricane, had been afraid.
She emerged from the void where the bijuu could talk to the cold autumn night, mere minutes after she had first been summoned. Her heart was beating hard in her chest, her hands and forearms were covered in blood, and she had an entire human corpse hanging from her jaws by the neck. She was on all fours, her chakra chains had dispelled at some point.
Her eyes were fixed on one of the rookie genin -- Choza Akimichi, who watched her from below with terror in his eyes and on his face. He was on the street, Kushina realized. She was on the roof of a wall around an estate -- a tile shifted under her hand when she moved around.
She spat the human out, and wondered why the taste of human meat hadn't been unpleasant. It didn't taste good, but she knew she should have been repulsed by having a human's throat in her mouth. And she hadn't been.
"What are you looking at?" Kushina growled without meaning too. Leftover scraps of the fox's chakra in her system deepened her voice. The more she breathed, the more her seal reabsorbed the bijuu's chakra. She felt her teeth return to normal, and naturally moved to stand on her feet again. "It's dangerous out here. You should stay with your team, rookie."
Choza nodded and steadily backed away. Once he was sure he wasn't going to be attacked, the rookie turn and ran as fast as he could.
Kushina looked down on the corpse she'd had in her mouth -- an Uchiha. An older teen, maybe eighteen or nineteen. He'd been torn to shreds, like he'd been mauled by a bear. She looked around -- and something seemed off. She'd seen a couple trees in and around the island -- but they'd all fallen over. A couple, near the shore, were gone entirely. She narrowed her eyes to see further, and the treelines along the south, east, and west of the island were all gone too. Only the northern treeline remained.
Several estates over, there was an ominous multi-colored glow.
She hauled the dead Uchiha up and jumped from rooftop to rooftop back toward where the fight had started.
More corpses littered the courtyard -- one was stitched to the wall with most of their torso open and emptied out, another was dead without any blows whatsoever, Kushina's original victim had a broken neck, one was covered in a swarm of bugs, and the last was impaled through the forehead by a coral spike.
The source of the multi-colored glow was Noburu, surrounded by their friends on the second floor of the estate's main house.
Kushina dropped the corpse, and joined them. Right away, Hizashi and Shibi approached her only to stop when they saw all the blood.
It didn't stop Junko, though. Junko walked right between the squeamish boys to bind Kushina in a bone-crushing hug. "You did so well," Junko whispered to her while Kushina choked for air. "Used your chains to break that arrogant girl's neck, and chased down the last one who thought he could escape. All your training paid off -- I'm so proud of you."
Kushina was allowed to take a gasping breath once Junko ended the hug.
She held Kushina at arm's length, beaming. "If you were a Kaguya, you would be considered an adult now. All grown up! Able to choose whom you marry, if anyone, and honored with a wind chime made from your victim's bones." She didn't seem to care about the blood all over her clothes and hair from Kushina's flailing.
Kushina still hadn't fully caught her breath from the strength of the hug. "Aw… J-unko that's… I don't know what to say."
"I don't think they'll let us make a wind chime from their bones, Konoha ninja are weirdos." Junko glanced at Kushina's teammates, then beamed at Kushina again. "But! When you come to visit us, I'll make sure you get a seat at the grown-up's table."
Junko seemed… so perky, even though Haruki was dead not three meters away. She followed Kushina's glances, and rolled her eyes.
"Oh -- don't be silly. We're ninja." Junko tilted her head, and let Kushina go so she could put her hands on her hips. "We kill people all the time -- that sort of thing happens." She gestured at Noburu and Haruki with a flippant flick of her hand, and stuck her tongue out. "Besides -- Noburu's fixing him up."
Kushina looked at Shibi and Hizashi, confused. The boys didn't give her a lot of confidence when they avoided her gaze.
She looked at Noburu, and saw him working fast with a clone of his on Haruki's other side. The clone formed a handsign and vanished in smoke. Then another clone would appear and do the same. Over, and over, and over.
"He is having his clones transform into blood," Hizashi explained. "I… don't know how he's managing it, but I saw with my byakugan that Haruki's blood is increasing. The wound in his neck is gone, too." He looked wary, like he was afraid to approach his cousin. "But… Haruki should be conscious now, if that's all it took."
"Noburu said something about the Shinigami just before you arrived," Shibi added. "I couldn't catch it, unfortunately."
Kushina remembered the shrine to the Shinigami back in Uzushio -- the great horned god of death, reaper of souls.
Kushina approached Noburu slowly, she paused every time she caught a glimpse of the fox's bloody red chakra, then resumed shortly afterward. "Noburu?"
He turned to look at her -- his byakugan active, but had changed. No more were they two lavender disks in his eyes -- they had been replaced with gold. "Sup?" There was something in his hoodie pocket, perhaps a ninja rodent.
His casual air disturbed Kushina almost as much as the crushing killing intent he'd loosed earlier had.
"Um…. Are you going to be able… to get Haruki back?"
"Probably. Just need to get this done before the Shinigami shows up." He turned back to Haruki's pallid body. "Gave him a blood pill -- with these clones acting as stop gap, that'll have time to kick in." His hands were in the sign for making shadow clones -- not the magical hand technique.
Kushina saw something in the pocket of Noburu's hoodie. Not a ninja rodent, like she'd thought, but the hilt to a tanto. One of the ones from the genin teams?
"And -- if the Shinigami comes by before I'm ready -- I fight him." Noburu shifted his weight, and the hilt vanished deeper into his hoodie pocket. "With a weapon that can harm spiritual beings."
Something about that didn't sit right with her. Fighting the Shinigami was always seen as foolish -- death would win. But… what if Noburu won? What would happen?
And how did Noburu get a weapon that could harm death?
"Noburu -- what happened to your byakugan, and where did you get that tanto?"
"In order of asking," Noburu answered briskly. "I dunno. After you and Kousuke joined the others in loaning me some chakra, they turned into this." He tapped his face with his hands, still in the handsign. The flow of clones into Haruki hadn't stopped or slowed. "And the tanto isn't a tanto. It's something called a zanpakutou."
Noburu smiled, happy despite the circumstances.
"He was always there. I just… forgot how to reach out and grab him -- to make him real. This whole experience made me remember." One of Noburu's eyebrows arched. "Dunno if the poison ability will work here -- not a lot of reishi. But if the Shinigami knows what's good for him, he won't make me find out."
Kushina felt the same dread as when Noburu had projected killing intent across an entire continent. He was contemplating fighting the god of death -- and winning. A normal person would assume hubris -- but Kushina wondered if it was something different.
Absent anything else she could do that wouldn't make the situation worse -- Kushina knelt down and began to pray.
'Don't fight, O Death. Let this soul return -- lest all souls be put at risk.'
---
Not a full Bleach crossover, mind. Just reincarnation chicanery. Let's hope Shinigami bitches his face off before he sees the shikai.
Anyway, say hello to the reason for Haruki getting Yamcha'd in the first place. The equivalent to the mangekyou sharingan -- the kaibyakugan.
Glossary:
Kaibyakugan: An evolution of the base byakugan brought about by intense emotional distress in a person with massive chakra. Often, the chakra needed to make the transition is comparable to a jinchuuriki, or requires external absorption. The kaibyakugan summons a past life of the user, and fuses them to their present incarnation. This can result in physical changes, additional skillsets, or unique powers manifesting. Unlike the mangekyou sharingan, the kaibyakugan does not damage the eyes of the user, but it also cannot be deactivated without death.
Oof. On the one hand, a paralyzed Hiruzen (quadriplegic? Just severely numbed and slowed? Full paralysis is a death sentence, and his sentence wasn't death.) cripples Konoha in a time they really can't afford. On the other hand, Divine Judgement will stifle any power jockeying within Konoha itself, and while it might not do anything to the other Villages (who will not believe it and just see weakness, or WILL and use it as an excuse to step up war)...getting blasted by Shinigami Noburu will keep them cautious and on edge until they figure out what the source is, and how to deal with that in battle plans.
Edit: Looking back at it too...it's doubly damning. In the amount of time it took to Genjutsu, then kill Haruki, the Uchiha ROOT operatives could have just...stolen the jars/scrolls-containing-jars and made their escape. It would have been obvious what happened, but it would have been obvious anyway when the jars mysteriously weren't on the bodies of the Oto-genin. They had deliberate orders to go for the kill, probably on both Haruki and Junko (not Noburu whose death would be a Problem, and Junko it seems was too hard a target). And that is just...pointlessly stupid. If they just stole the jars, Konoha could have bullied Oto into 'accepting' an obvious lie about rogue agents or enemy infiltrators. Oto is in no position to lose Konohan military support after all. Killing the Genin team is just petty bullshit and/or trying to pull some VERY dumb mind-games with Noburu. Maybe make him unstable and liable to explode on Oto? Maybe to make him aggressive enough to actually attack, and give Danzo the excuse to capture him then 'interrogate' all his prophetic secrets out? Either way, it's stupid games with stupid rewards compared to all the other soft levers Konoha has (that Danzo can't personally touch). Though it does make me wonder if there are perhaps some shenanigans going on with the tensions back in Oto. Just the right amount of rioting would keep Oto still a contributor in the war, but weakened overall compared to Konoha. Only issue there is ROOT isn't really that big yet, and there are plenty of more worthwhile places for them to be still.
Edit: Looking back at it too...it's doubly damning. In the amount of time it took to Genjutsu, then kill Haruki, the Uchiha ROOT operatives could have just...stolen the jars/scrolls-containing-jars and made their escape. It would have been obvious what happened, but it would have been obvious anyway when the jars mysteriously weren't on the bodies of the Oto-genin. They had deliberate orders to go for the kill, probably on both Haruki and Junko (not Noburu whose death would be a Problem, and Junko it seems was too hard a target). And that is just...pointlessly stupid. If they just stole the jars, Konoha could have bullied Oto into 'accepting' an obvious lie about rogue agents or enemy infiltrators. Oto is in no position to lose Konohan military support after all. Killing the Genin team is just petty bullshit and/or trying to pull some VERY dumb mind-games with Noburu. Maybe make him unstable and liable to explode on Oto? Maybe to make him aggressive enough to actually attack, and give Danzo the excuse to capture him then 'interrogate' all his prophetic secrets out? Either way, it's stupid games with stupid rewards compared to all the other soft levers Konoha has (that Danzo can't personally touch). Though it does make me wonder if there are perhaps some shenanigans going on with the tensions back in Oto. Just the right amount of rioting would keep Oto still a contributor in the war, but weakened overall compared to Konoha. Only issue there is ROOT isn't really that big yet, and there are plenty of more worthwhile places for them to be still.
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Theres escalation. Slowly increasing tension and stakes accompanied by power creep. Which is a common enough and understandable trope in shounen.
And then theres this thing thats like someone taking an elevator and finding out theyve boarded a rocketship, gotten to space, and seeing the pilot reach for the lever marked hyperdrive.
I do like the touch of Byakugan also having evolutions. The Sharingan always seemed too weirdly special compared to the other kekkai genkai and Byakugan, a supposed branch off the Rinnegan and another eye based bloodline makes good contrast. You could say the sharingan deals with manipulation of chakra and the illusion/reality divide, so most of its evolutions and abilities make some kind of sense. But a byakugan evolution, which was more about sight and themes on limited omniscience might follow something like Clairvoyance, Pericognition, Futuresight. Although the past life thing does seem somewhat adjacent, It should have been something put on a higher level ability, instead of the base mangekyo equivalent.
And then theres this thing thats like someone taking an elevator and finding out theyve boarded a rocketship, gotten to space, and seeing the pilot reach for the lever marked hyperdrive.
I do like the touch of Byakugan also having evolutions. The Sharingan always seemed too weirdly special compared to the other kekkai genkai and Byakugan, a supposed branch off the Rinnegan and another eye based bloodline makes good contrast. You could say the sharingan deals with manipulation of chakra and the illusion/reality divide, so most of its evolutions and abilities make some kind of sense. But a byakugan evolution, which was more about sight and themes on limited omniscience might follow something like Clairvoyance, Pericognition, Futuresight. Although the past life thing does seem somewhat adjacent, It should have been something put on a higher level ability, instead of the base mangekyo equivalent.
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Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Understandable, but the final evolution of the byakugan provides a unique type of chakra along with truth-seeking orbs. The tenseigan is strong.
Also, when I watched Urashiki and Momoshiki develop this evolution of the byakugan, they both clearly drew their power from summoning something which fused to them. I had to make the evolution strong -- but also this clear theme of summoning something. So, with the tenseigan being the 'reincarnation eye' I went with the theme of it involving past lives.
Those are all powers established as being advanced uses of the base byakugan, though. The Otsutsuki nerds use it to read minds, see the future, and shit like that. They're kinda bullshit.
Considering Orochimaru was the most skilled user of killing intent Konoha had before this, they might assume he's responsible, or that Kurama almost got free. The tensions in Oto are... being helped along. I think y'all can guess by whom. Danzo is unfortunately the victim of Hiruzen's inaction too. He really is great at stealth and counterintelligence. But his lack of reprimand meant he never developed skills like 'management' or 'respect for allies'. From there, paranoia did the rest.
Ch 61
Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Chapter 61: Breathe In
---
Genin Fujimoto
When he last had cognizant thought, he'd died. In the moments before he fully parsed that he was awake, he first realized he was also alive.
That was a sour way to wake up. Haruki had made peace with death, and suddenly he wasn't dead. Noburu's medical talents had to be responsible.
Well, if his adopted brother wanted him to stick around, Haruki owed it to him to make his life annoying. He wanted to get on that, when he opened his eyes and found a wet rag over them. Where others would be confused by such an object, Haruki saw it as a tool for vengeance.
If only his arms would cooperate.
His body seemed like it was carved from stone, unable to move or even twitch at his commands. After some time bringing his spectacular will to bear, Haruki managed to get his jaw to obey.
"Haaaaa," he spoke, dramatically. "Aaaach."
"I'm right here, dumbass," he heard muffled words speak from his side. They sounded far away, but the only one he knew who would call him 'dumbass' was his brother.
Briefly, the wet towel over his eyes was removed. Haruki saw blue sky through cracks in a roof.
Haruki couldn't turn his head to follow where the rag had gone, but he heard the splash of water. "Haaa." He briefly caught a glimpse of Noburu – with gold byakugan eyes – before the rag was placed over his eyes again. "Ah!"
"Don't you take that tone with me," Noburu chided him. "I'm your doctor, and you don't have enough blood yet to be that loud."
"Aah."
"That's better." Something glass moved around. "So, how was being dead for three and a half minutes?"
Haruki didn't have as much of a reaction as he thought he would. He was dead. And it didn't bother him much at all.
"Aah."
"Hmm. You did look pretty peaceful on the way out the door. Really, you're lucky that such a short time being dead kept you from seeing anything fucked up."
Noburu went on about the crazy things he'd seen after his deaths. A universe where the basic building block of matter wasn't the atom, but brine shrimp; gold-based life; a highlight reel of his greatest failures as perceived by the top god of another universe.
With a rag over his eyes, unable to move, Haruki didn't have many options other than to listen, and think. Everything past his head and shoulders felt numb – he was aware of his weight, and nothing else. But minute by minute that changed – sensation returned.
He'd faced death, and hadn't been a coward about it. He'd accepted death, and was willing to go on. The foreknowledge of reincarnation helped a lot. There was no end to life from his perspective, just new life.
Haruki was proud of himself.
He knew he wouldn't beg any otherworldly power to save him from death, next time. He knew he wouldn't become a backstabber to escape death, next time.
That realization made him willing to endure being numb for a few hours until he could make his survival Noburu's problem.
"...and it's always nice seeing universes where two plus two equals fish – oh, hey Junko's back." There was a scrape of wood on wood, and footsteps. "How'd your search go?"
"Great!" Junko's peppy voice was good to hear again. "It was an urn at the bottom of a well – and there were leeches down there – so I stabbed them until they tried climbing the walls to escape, but they just weren't fast enough."
"Alright! I can grind these up, fry 'em, and we'll be having tacos tonight." Noburu shifted, and seemed to walk away. "Princess is awake. Say hi, Princess!"
"Aaaah," Haruki greeted the most murderous of their trio.
"Welcome back!" Junko's voice was close by, perhaps she was at his side? He felt her pat him on the head. "How was dying?"
"Ah."
"Yeah, I don't know why so many people are babies about it either. But glad you had a healthy response!"
Haruki heard something horrible in the next room over – a loud whirring and grinding noise. Like a food processor, but bigger.
Leech puree would soon be available for taco making, seemingly. Hopefully they had enough seasonings to cover the metallic taste of the leeches.
"Alright," Noburu announced as he returned to the room. "Those two idiots will get to making dinner – I'll go get my artifact, be back asap." In a moment his voice spoke directly at Haruki, perhaps thirty centimeters away from his head. "And hopefully by then that second blood pill will have kicked in and you'll be on your feet. Elsewise Imma have to puppet you to get yours."
"Hach," Haruki barked back.
"That's the spirit. Seeya in a bit."
--
Legendary Sannin Jiraiya
He was so unbelievably lucky he'd been drunk last night – he'd wanted to celebrate Danzo Shimura's first unequivocal defeat in his lifetime – because he'd managed to sleep through some freaky stuff.
First? All the trees in Konoha had fallen down. All of them. The only ones left were the ones that had collapsed onto people's homes. Twelve kilometers outside the village walls in every direction was barren of trees too. Witnesses confirmed that they'd seen the trees subsumed into the earth – like earth release jutsu had been used.
Second? Sarutobi-sensei's face on the Hokage monument had been damaged. Somehow, water had built up under the rocks and eventually broke through. Sarutobi-sensei's face from the nose downward was gone and a new waterfall of hot spring water had taken its place.
Luckily no one lived at the base of the mountain, or they'd have been drowned by boiling hot water.
Third? And the most freaky of all? Everyone in the village had reported a wave of killing intent that outclassed everything they'd felt in their lives. It had doused flames, it had caused animals of all kinds to huddle in place and scream – unwilling to run.
Once the sun came up, reports came in from all across the continent – and beyond. Whatever had emitted the killing intent had reached out all the way to Swamp Country on the subcontinent. Konoha was the center of it.
As the acting Hokage, he had to deal with it. And he did so in the most effective way possible.
He went to the suspected source, with an air of seeming flippancy but a core of terrified anxiety.
Jiraiya's feet led him to Orochimaru's new house. It looked rather nice, a lot nicer than his old apartment – even though there was no balcony.
Orochimaru never used the balcony except as a back door anyway.
With trepidation, he knocked on the door. He could hear some kind of music inside, but that could be anything. It was a bit quiet to cover screams, but if one compromised the victim's lungs beforehand….
Jiraiya forced himself to look calm and at ease as Orochimaru answered the door in ridiculous fashion. Not in a ridiculous manner, but in literal ridiculous fashion.
Orochimaru stood there in a unitard – yellow with purple legs -- with lavender leg warmers, wrist weights, and a sweatband under his hair. "Jiraiya, good to see you." As he stood in the door way Orochimaru marched in place, getting his knees oddly high as he did. "I'm in the middle of aerobics – what's up?"
Jiraiya's mind blanked for a solid two seconds as he struggled to parse that his friend, fellow Legendary Sannin, and the most proficient infiltration shinobi currently living, did aerobics. It was a civilian thing, too soft for ninja training.
"Um." Jiraiya started to talk, stopped himself, glanced at Orochimaru's leg warmers again, then held his curled-up fingers in front of his mouth to stymie any laughter. "Just… checking in with you after what happened last night?"
"Oh, I'm fine. Noburu sent his rat messenger to let me know what happened. After that, it all started to make sense." Orochimaru shrugged. "It's infuriating that Danzo pulled another stunt, but we knew he would eventually, right?"
Rapidly, Jiraiya blinked as he suddenly connected the dots. All his anxiety and fears that Orochimaru had finally snapped melted into liquid rage at Danzo. Through clenched teeth, Jiraiya asked a question with a saccharine tone. "Oh? Care to share the juicy details?"
Orochimaru's new house was pretty nice. Around the back half of the house somewhere there were wind chimes that created soft music when the wind swept through. Orochimaru's tea room featured thick, fluffy cushions that felt like a cloud to sit on.
Tea was served, and while doing so Orochimaru spelled out the situation. "So. Danzo had two teams infiltrate the exams to act as a hit squad." He smiled and took a sip of tea.
Jiraiya felt dread creep into his soul. Orochimaru seemed happy about that. Why?
"Those teams decided to try and steal the specialized syrups used in the Witch's Bubble jutsu to increase its strength. And in the process, they almost killed my adoptive nephew – Haruki."
The dread that Jiraiya felt earlier escalated into fear. Danzo's goons had almost killed an allied village's ninja – the last male with a kekkei genkai even – over a jutsu? That was grounds for a war.
Oto would never do it with Kumo eyeing them up, but it created an entirely unnecessary rift between the two villages.
"Sayaka is letting her village leadership know about this upstairs." Orochimaru sipped his tea, still pleasant in tone and expression. "Not thirsty, Jiraiya?"
With a muttered apology, Jiraiya took a sip of the tea. It had an oddly fruity aftertaste, not unpleasant but unexpected. "So… why aren't you on the rampage right now?"
"Because I've found out the perfect way to get revenge on Danzo. It came to me in a dream." Orochimaru's smile became sharper, his eyes narrowed, a faint aura of killing intent emanated from him. "Let me share the details with you, just a moment."
Orochimaru stood from the tea table, went to a bookshelf, and came back with a white envelope that he offered to Jiraiya.
The words on the envelope chilled him to his core.
'Resignation Letter', was the title of the envelope. It claimed 'hostile workplace' as the cause for the resignation. It was addressed to the daimyo.
Jiraiya looked up at Orochimaru, mouth open wide.
"I'm going to arrange a face to face meeting when the daimyo comes for the chunin exams final test," Orochimaru explained. "Then, I'll begin the process for retirement. Maybe move to Oto, so I can be with family."
The toad pervert's mind couldn't make sense of what he'd heard when he heard it. He had to manually stop his train of thought and re-center himself. "You're giving up your career to stick it to Danzo? When a war's ongoing?"
"Danzo and Sarutobi-sensei made it necessary, I'm afraid. Having to put up with their abuse is simply too much." Orochimaru sighed, as his killing intent vanished. "...I suppose you've got a month and change to convince me otherwise; but I don't presently see how you'll manage it." Orochimaru looked down at his tea, his smile gone and his saccharine mannerisms abandoned.
"...I've found I enjoy teaching, though." Orochimaru continued. "So… if my team doesn't pass the exams, I'll stay."
That put Jiraiya in an uncomfortable place – Kushina, Hizashi, and Shibi were some of the top picks for chunin rank. He had to sabotage his best friend's team in the exams if he wanted Orochimaru to stay, or convince him otherwise. Without Orochimaru – all that fighting over the contested territories would be worthless.
His student's deaths would be worthless.
At first, he didn't think Orochimaru had considered that. But when he met Orochimaru's eyes, he saw glass look back at him. Orochimaru was visibly at his limit for utter nonsense.
Jiraiya took a deep breath and met his teammate's eyes. "Alright. How do I convince you to stay?"
"Let's start with asking some pointed questions of Danzo Shimura…."
--
Genin Fujimoto
Haruki was able to move after several hours of being numb – a testament to Noburu's medical skill. Long before he was able to stand, he was able to feel his body, and noted he had gained a new scar on his abdomen.
Also that, under the blankets, he was nude.
Noburu reacted to Haruki's questions on that count as a brother should.
"Well, see Princess? When folks die they tend to go all limp. Including the muscles keeping you from having an accident in your pants." Noburu flicked him in the head and deposited the porcelain dish he'd been tasked to retrieve in his sealing scroll. "So we had to get you cleaned up, and launder your stuff. Don't worry, your manties will be dry in a bit – I didn't let them stain."
Haruki, able to move around, responded as a brother should. He flicked a rock right between Noburu's eyes. "You'd better not, or I'll claim death gave me lactose intolerance – make Akami throw out all the milk and cheese in the fridge back home."
For his threat, Noburu jumped on him – and a tussle ensued. While Haruki quickly grabbed some hair to pull, Noburu bit his hair-pulling hand.
Junko giggled as the two of them started to wrassle. "You guys are so weird, wrestling with no knives." She casually drew a kunai and spun it on her finger. "Want me to show you how you really wrestle?"
Noburu spat out Haruki's hand, and disentangled himself from his adoptive brother. "Alright Princess, you good to walk?" The speckled ninja didn't wait for a reply – he made a shadow clone and snapped his fingers at Noburu. "Go with him, make sure he doesn't get stabbed again."
While the clone bemoaned the assignment, Noburu launched himself at Junko and a tussle ensued.
The clone helped Haruki get to his feet and steadied him while he walked and got dressed.
"So – what's up with the golden eyes?" He asked as he unrolled his scroll to receive his instructions. 'Retrieve a defunct summoning contract+, white backing and red markings, location estimate: northern quarter.'
Defunct summoning contracts typically meant that the ninja animals had stopped responding to the summoning jutsu – either they had died or nullified the contract's effect on them. Decorative, but useless.
"The delicious power of rage evolved my kekkei genkai – all mangenkyou sharingan style," the clone replied. "Don't forget your sword, Princess."
"I'm putting it on, stop nagging." Haruki threaded his sheathed katana through his belt and was about to shunshin his way out of the ruined manor house, but found himself falling headfirst toward the ground.
Thankfully, Noburu's shadow clone caught him with a chakra string. "So, that was almost a problem." The shadow clone shunshined down to him, and let him hit the ground without momentum. "Feeling light-headed? He asked ironically, given your head seemed to weigh you down back there."
"Might not have enough blood to do high-speed movements," Haruki muttered and got up from the ground with careful attention to his speed. The clone wouldn't help, not unless he fell again.
They walked together through the ruined settlement. Areas where the spike-shell turtles could come ashore were free of human remains, while the more secure areas showed how dense the population had been. Konoha ninja flitted around the walls and buildings, on the hunt for their assigned item.
Some of them recognized him and had the decency to wave. Some good will had been earned by helping them to cross over safely, it seemed.
Before, he might have found the ruined settlement's evidence of suffering sad. But his own brush with death let him see lichen and moss, fungi and insects. Any of those could have been the people who had lived in the settlement, reborn.
The part of their story where they'd suffered on the island was over, and they'd been moved to the next chapter.
"Alright, so whatcha lookin' for?" Noburu's clone interlocked his fingers behind his head as they walked. "I can byakugan around to see where it is."
"This test got completely wrecked by us, didn't it?" Haruki put his hands on his hips and looked around. "They expected folks to tear each other apart just to get to this point, then do it again to get back." He gave Noburu the description of the scroll, and off they went to an abandoned bathhouse.
"That is how Danzo sees the world. Why work together when you can win alone?"
They walked quiet for a while, before Haruki leaned his head toward Noburu's clone. "Thank you, by the way."
"You're welcome. Be sure to thank Kushina too – she chased down the fuckass who stabbed you." Noburu smiled, wicked and wide. "Joined the cannibal crew in so doing."
"Eugh."
"Alright, so." Noburu's clone brought his hands from behind his head and started to dig through wreckage with chakra strings. Timbers from the bathhouse's upper floors and roof were moved aside like annoyances. "Because so many of us aced this second exam, they're likely to hold preliminary matches before the third exam's tournament structure."
"Man, Konoha really is predictable." Haruki kept his eyes out for the scroll.
"It's because they've won so much and so often that their tactics haven't needed to change. Others have to change their tactics to beat them. But anyway." Noburu's clone used both hands to haul a section of the second floor off the ground and into the street. "I'm reasonably certain you're not in any shape to fight at a chunin level, speaking as your doctor, so we're going to wait another day before we go around and get everyone ready to go back across the moat."
"Reasonable."
From the wreckage – they found the scroll. Stained and moldy, but still recognizable. Haruki held it up, then turned to Noburu.
"Just in case Danzo booby-trapped this, could you take a look at it?" An amateur would have rigged it to explode when touched. But Danzo was described as a proficient, petty, and mean-spirited assassin.
The possibility of a lingering, slow death couldn't be discounted.
Noburu's clone looked at it with his fancy gold eyes and narrowed them. "Hmm. The mold is probably not good to breathe near – and it's old. The silk's starting to break down from age, meaning it's at least a hundred years old."
Haruki arched his eyebrow. "How do you know that about silk?"
"While cleaning your britches, Junko talked all about silk."
He really hoped his brother had the sense not to clean his 'britches' where the squirrel people could see. Wasn't much he could do about it, though. After a moment, he'd sealed the defunct scroll into another scroll – and they were done.
The two of them made their way back, at a placid pace while all around them other genin scoured the island.
"We're going to tell mom what happened," Noburu's clone announced as they drew nearer the ruined manor their team was based out of. "She deserves to know it wasn't as safe as advertised."
Haruki nodded. "You want to send her a messenger mouse, or tell her in person?"
"Every time I've told someone 'hey, I almost died, so you know' without doing it in person they slap me when I see them next." Noburu's clone shook his head. "We'll just do it in person."
They walked in silence for perhaps nine steps before the shadow clone pulled Haruki in for a side-hug. "I'm glad you didn't end up a vegetable, by the way."
"As we established years ago, I'm not a half-tree mutant. It was never possible for me to be a vegetable." Haruki returned the clone's side hug. "And I have a good doctor. On that count, should I be offended that Junko seemed mostly alright with me nearly dying? I'm alright with me nearly dying, but it's weird that she is."
"Kaguya express love through violence – as soon as you're back to a hundred percent she'll wrestle you with knives just like she is with the boss."
As soon as the clone said that, there was a burst of broken wood and dust from the second floor of the ruined manor. Noburu and Junko, both bloody with multiple kunai in their upper bodies, emerged from the burst still in the midst of a wrassle. They hit the ground in the courtyard and vanished from view without stopping.
"See? Like that." The clone was all smiles. "We'll stitch you up good afterward, won't even leave scars unless you want 'em."
For a moment Haruki considered if being dead was the safer bet. But then he decided – life was short, he should at least indulge the Kaguya way of wrestling. Once.
And then, never again.
---
A bit of a breather chapter from the last two high-octane chapters. Orochimaru's learned the value of his labor and isn't afraid to withhold it now. Good for him! Haruki's learned that life doesn't have an end, but certain chapters do. Good for him!
Junko has learned Noburu loves her enough to stab her in the throat, and reciprocates. Good for her!
---
Genin Fujimoto
When he last had cognizant thought, he'd died. In the moments before he fully parsed that he was awake, he first realized he was also alive.
That was a sour way to wake up. Haruki had made peace with death, and suddenly he wasn't dead. Noburu's medical talents had to be responsible.
Well, if his adopted brother wanted him to stick around, Haruki owed it to him to make his life annoying. He wanted to get on that, when he opened his eyes and found a wet rag over them. Where others would be confused by such an object, Haruki saw it as a tool for vengeance.
If only his arms would cooperate.
His body seemed like it was carved from stone, unable to move or even twitch at his commands. After some time bringing his spectacular will to bear, Haruki managed to get his jaw to obey.
"Haaaaa," he spoke, dramatically. "Aaaach."
"I'm right here, dumbass," he heard muffled words speak from his side. They sounded far away, but the only one he knew who would call him 'dumbass' was his brother.
Briefly, the wet towel over his eyes was removed. Haruki saw blue sky through cracks in a roof.
Haruki couldn't turn his head to follow where the rag had gone, but he heard the splash of water. "Haaa." He briefly caught a glimpse of Noburu – with gold byakugan eyes – before the rag was placed over his eyes again. "Ah!"
"Don't you take that tone with me," Noburu chided him. "I'm your doctor, and you don't have enough blood yet to be that loud."
"Aah."
"That's better." Something glass moved around. "So, how was being dead for three and a half minutes?"
Haruki didn't have as much of a reaction as he thought he would. He was dead. And it didn't bother him much at all.
"Aah."
"Hmm. You did look pretty peaceful on the way out the door. Really, you're lucky that such a short time being dead kept you from seeing anything fucked up."
Noburu went on about the crazy things he'd seen after his deaths. A universe where the basic building block of matter wasn't the atom, but brine shrimp; gold-based life; a highlight reel of his greatest failures as perceived by the top god of another universe.
With a rag over his eyes, unable to move, Haruki didn't have many options other than to listen, and think. Everything past his head and shoulders felt numb – he was aware of his weight, and nothing else. But minute by minute that changed – sensation returned.
He'd faced death, and hadn't been a coward about it. He'd accepted death, and was willing to go on. The foreknowledge of reincarnation helped a lot. There was no end to life from his perspective, just new life.
Haruki was proud of himself.
He knew he wouldn't beg any otherworldly power to save him from death, next time. He knew he wouldn't become a backstabber to escape death, next time.
That realization made him willing to endure being numb for a few hours until he could make his survival Noburu's problem.
"...and it's always nice seeing universes where two plus two equals fish – oh, hey Junko's back." There was a scrape of wood on wood, and footsteps. "How'd your search go?"
"Great!" Junko's peppy voice was good to hear again. "It was an urn at the bottom of a well – and there were leeches down there – so I stabbed them until they tried climbing the walls to escape, but they just weren't fast enough."
"Alright! I can grind these up, fry 'em, and we'll be having tacos tonight." Noburu shifted, and seemed to walk away. "Princess is awake. Say hi, Princess!"
"Aaaah," Haruki greeted the most murderous of their trio.
"Welcome back!" Junko's voice was close by, perhaps she was at his side? He felt her pat him on the head. "How was dying?"
"Ah."
"Yeah, I don't know why so many people are babies about it either. But glad you had a healthy response!"
Haruki heard something horrible in the next room over – a loud whirring and grinding noise. Like a food processor, but bigger.
Leech puree would soon be available for taco making, seemingly. Hopefully they had enough seasonings to cover the metallic taste of the leeches.
"Alright," Noburu announced as he returned to the room. "Those two idiots will get to making dinner – I'll go get my artifact, be back asap." In a moment his voice spoke directly at Haruki, perhaps thirty centimeters away from his head. "And hopefully by then that second blood pill will have kicked in and you'll be on your feet. Elsewise Imma have to puppet you to get yours."
"Hach," Haruki barked back.
"That's the spirit. Seeya in a bit."
--
Legendary Sannin Jiraiya
He was so unbelievably lucky he'd been drunk last night – he'd wanted to celebrate Danzo Shimura's first unequivocal defeat in his lifetime – because he'd managed to sleep through some freaky stuff.
First? All the trees in Konoha had fallen down. All of them. The only ones left were the ones that had collapsed onto people's homes. Twelve kilometers outside the village walls in every direction was barren of trees too. Witnesses confirmed that they'd seen the trees subsumed into the earth – like earth release jutsu had been used.
Second? Sarutobi-sensei's face on the Hokage monument had been damaged. Somehow, water had built up under the rocks and eventually broke through. Sarutobi-sensei's face from the nose downward was gone and a new waterfall of hot spring water had taken its place.
Luckily no one lived at the base of the mountain, or they'd have been drowned by boiling hot water.
Third? And the most freaky of all? Everyone in the village had reported a wave of killing intent that outclassed everything they'd felt in their lives. It had doused flames, it had caused animals of all kinds to huddle in place and scream – unwilling to run.
Once the sun came up, reports came in from all across the continent – and beyond. Whatever had emitted the killing intent had reached out all the way to Swamp Country on the subcontinent. Konoha was the center of it.
As the acting Hokage, he had to deal with it. And he did so in the most effective way possible.
He went to the suspected source, with an air of seeming flippancy but a core of terrified anxiety.
Jiraiya's feet led him to Orochimaru's new house. It looked rather nice, a lot nicer than his old apartment – even though there was no balcony.
Orochimaru never used the balcony except as a back door anyway.
With trepidation, he knocked on the door. He could hear some kind of music inside, but that could be anything. It was a bit quiet to cover screams, but if one compromised the victim's lungs beforehand….
Jiraiya forced himself to look calm and at ease as Orochimaru answered the door in ridiculous fashion. Not in a ridiculous manner, but in literal ridiculous fashion.
Orochimaru stood there in a unitard – yellow with purple legs -- with lavender leg warmers, wrist weights, and a sweatband under his hair. "Jiraiya, good to see you." As he stood in the door way Orochimaru marched in place, getting his knees oddly high as he did. "I'm in the middle of aerobics – what's up?"
Jiraiya's mind blanked for a solid two seconds as he struggled to parse that his friend, fellow Legendary Sannin, and the most proficient infiltration shinobi currently living, did aerobics. It was a civilian thing, too soft for ninja training.
"Um." Jiraiya started to talk, stopped himself, glanced at Orochimaru's leg warmers again, then held his curled-up fingers in front of his mouth to stymie any laughter. "Just… checking in with you after what happened last night?"
"Oh, I'm fine. Noburu sent his rat messenger to let me know what happened. After that, it all started to make sense." Orochimaru shrugged. "It's infuriating that Danzo pulled another stunt, but we knew he would eventually, right?"
Rapidly, Jiraiya blinked as he suddenly connected the dots. All his anxiety and fears that Orochimaru had finally snapped melted into liquid rage at Danzo. Through clenched teeth, Jiraiya asked a question with a saccharine tone. "Oh? Care to share the juicy details?"
Orochimaru's new house was pretty nice. Around the back half of the house somewhere there were wind chimes that created soft music when the wind swept through. Orochimaru's tea room featured thick, fluffy cushions that felt like a cloud to sit on.
Tea was served, and while doing so Orochimaru spelled out the situation. "So. Danzo had two teams infiltrate the exams to act as a hit squad." He smiled and took a sip of tea.
Jiraiya felt dread creep into his soul. Orochimaru seemed happy about that. Why?
"Those teams decided to try and steal the specialized syrups used in the Witch's Bubble jutsu to increase its strength. And in the process, they almost killed my adoptive nephew – Haruki."
The dread that Jiraiya felt earlier escalated into fear. Danzo's goons had almost killed an allied village's ninja – the last male with a kekkei genkai even – over a jutsu? That was grounds for a war.
Oto would never do it with Kumo eyeing them up, but it created an entirely unnecessary rift between the two villages.
"Sayaka is letting her village leadership know about this upstairs." Orochimaru sipped his tea, still pleasant in tone and expression. "Not thirsty, Jiraiya?"
With a muttered apology, Jiraiya took a sip of the tea. It had an oddly fruity aftertaste, not unpleasant but unexpected. "So… why aren't you on the rampage right now?"
"Because I've found out the perfect way to get revenge on Danzo. It came to me in a dream." Orochimaru's smile became sharper, his eyes narrowed, a faint aura of killing intent emanated from him. "Let me share the details with you, just a moment."
Orochimaru stood from the tea table, went to a bookshelf, and came back with a white envelope that he offered to Jiraiya.
The words on the envelope chilled him to his core.
'Resignation Letter', was the title of the envelope. It claimed 'hostile workplace' as the cause for the resignation. It was addressed to the daimyo.
Jiraiya looked up at Orochimaru, mouth open wide.
"I'm going to arrange a face to face meeting when the daimyo comes for the chunin exams final test," Orochimaru explained. "Then, I'll begin the process for retirement. Maybe move to Oto, so I can be with family."
The toad pervert's mind couldn't make sense of what he'd heard when he heard it. He had to manually stop his train of thought and re-center himself. "You're giving up your career to stick it to Danzo? When a war's ongoing?"
"Danzo and Sarutobi-sensei made it necessary, I'm afraid. Having to put up with their abuse is simply too much." Orochimaru sighed, as his killing intent vanished. "...I suppose you've got a month and change to convince me otherwise; but I don't presently see how you'll manage it." Orochimaru looked down at his tea, his smile gone and his saccharine mannerisms abandoned.
"...I've found I enjoy teaching, though." Orochimaru continued. "So… if my team doesn't pass the exams, I'll stay."
That put Jiraiya in an uncomfortable place – Kushina, Hizashi, and Shibi were some of the top picks for chunin rank. He had to sabotage his best friend's team in the exams if he wanted Orochimaru to stay, or convince him otherwise. Without Orochimaru – all that fighting over the contested territories would be worthless.
His student's deaths would be worthless.
At first, he didn't think Orochimaru had considered that. But when he met Orochimaru's eyes, he saw glass look back at him. Orochimaru was visibly at his limit for utter nonsense.
Jiraiya took a deep breath and met his teammate's eyes. "Alright. How do I convince you to stay?"
"Let's start with asking some pointed questions of Danzo Shimura…."
--
Genin Fujimoto
Haruki was able to move after several hours of being numb – a testament to Noburu's medical skill. Long before he was able to stand, he was able to feel his body, and noted he had gained a new scar on his abdomen.
Also that, under the blankets, he was nude.
Noburu reacted to Haruki's questions on that count as a brother should.
"Well, see Princess? When folks die they tend to go all limp. Including the muscles keeping you from having an accident in your pants." Noburu flicked him in the head and deposited the porcelain dish he'd been tasked to retrieve in his sealing scroll. "So we had to get you cleaned up, and launder your stuff. Don't worry, your manties will be dry in a bit – I didn't let them stain."
Haruki, able to move around, responded as a brother should. He flicked a rock right between Noburu's eyes. "You'd better not, or I'll claim death gave me lactose intolerance – make Akami throw out all the milk and cheese in the fridge back home."
For his threat, Noburu jumped on him – and a tussle ensued. While Haruki quickly grabbed some hair to pull, Noburu bit his hair-pulling hand.
Junko giggled as the two of them started to wrassle. "You guys are so weird, wrestling with no knives." She casually drew a kunai and spun it on her finger. "Want me to show you how you really wrestle?"
Noburu spat out Haruki's hand, and disentangled himself from his adoptive brother. "Alright Princess, you good to walk?" The speckled ninja didn't wait for a reply – he made a shadow clone and snapped his fingers at Noburu. "Go with him, make sure he doesn't get stabbed again."
While the clone bemoaned the assignment, Noburu launched himself at Junko and a tussle ensued.
The clone helped Haruki get to his feet and steadied him while he walked and got dressed.
"So – what's up with the golden eyes?" He asked as he unrolled his scroll to receive his instructions. 'Retrieve a defunct summoning contract+, white backing and red markings, location estimate: northern quarter.'
Defunct summoning contracts typically meant that the ninja animals had stopped responding to the summoning jutsu – either they had died or nullified the contract's effect on them. Decorative, but useless.
"The delicious power of rage evolved my kekkei genkai – all mangenkyou sharingan style," the clone replied. "Don't forget your sword, Princess."
"I'm putting it on, stop nagging." Haruki threaded his sheathed katana through his belt and was about to shunshin his way out of the ruined manor house, but found himself falling headfirst toward the ground.
Thankfully, Noburu's shadow clone caught him with a chakra string. "So, that was almost a problem." The shadow clone shunshined down to him, and let him hit the ground without momentum. "Feeling light-headed? He asked ironically, given your head seemed to weigh you down back there."
"Might not have enough blood to do high-speed movements," Haruki muttered and got up from the ground with careful attention to his speed. The clone wouldn't help, not unless he fell again.
They walked together through the ruined settlement. Areas where the spike-shell turtles could come ashore were free of human remains, while the more secure areas showed how dense the population had been. Konoha ninja flitted around the walls and buildings, on the hunt for their assigned item.
Some of them recognized him and had the decency to wave. Some good will had been earned by helping them to cross over safely, it seemed.
Before, he might have found the ruined settlement's evidence of suffering sad. But his own brush with death let him see lichen and moss, fungi and insects. Any of those could have been the people who had lived in the settlement, reborn.
The part of their story where they'd suffered on the island was over, and they'd been moved to the next chapter.
"Alright, so whatcha lookin' for?" Noburu's clone interlocked his fingers behind his head as they walked. "I can byakugan around to see where it is."
"This test got completely wrecked by us, didn't it?" Haruki put his hands on his hips and looked around. "They expected folks to tear each other apart just to get to this point, then do it again to get back." He gave Noburu the description of the scroll, and off they went to an abandoned bathhouse.
"That is how Danzo sees the world. Why work together when you can win alone?"
They walked quiet for a while, before Haruki leaned his head toward Noburu's clone. "Thank you, by the way."
"You're welcome. Be sure to thank Kushina too – she chased down the fuckass who stabbed you." Noburu smiled, wicked and wide. "Joined the cannibal crew in so doing."
"Eugh."
"Alright, so." Noburu's clone brought his hands from behind his head and started to dig through wreckage with chakra strings. Timbers from the bathhouse's upper floors and roof were moved aside like annoyances. "Because so many of us aced this second exam, they're likely to hold preliminary matches before the third exam's tournament structure."
"Man, Konoha really is predictable." Haruki kept his eyes out for the scroll.
"It's because they've won so much and so often that their tactics haven't needed to change. Others have to change their tactics to beat them. But anyway." Noburu's clone used both hands to haul a section of the second floor off the ground and into the street. "I'm reasonably certain you're not in any shape to fight at a chunin level, speaking as your doctor, so we're going to wait another day before we go around and get everyone ready to go back across the moat."
"Reasonable."
From the wreckage – they found the scroll. Stained and moldy, but still recognizable. Haruki held it up, then turned to Noburu.
"Just in case Danzo booby-trapped this, could you take a look at it?" An amateur would have rigged it to explode when touched. But Danzo was described as a proficient, petty, and mean-spirited assassin.
The possibility of a lingering, slow death couldn't be discounted.
Noburu's clone looked at it with his fancy gold eyes and narrowed them. "Hmm. The mold is probably not good to breathe near – and it's old. The silk's starting to break down from age, meaning it's at least a hundred years old."
Haruki arched his eyebrow. "How do you know that about silk?"
"While cleaning your britches, Junko talked all about silk."
He really hoped his brother had the sense not to clean his 'britches' where the squirrel people could see. Wasn't much he could do about it, though. After a moment, he'd sealed the defunct scroll into another scroll – and they were done.
The two of them made their way back, at a placid pace while all around them other genin scoured the island.
"We're going to tell mom what happened," Noburu's clone announced as they drew nearer the ruined manor their team was based out of. "She deserves to know it wasn't as safe as advertised."
Haruki nodded. "You want to send her a messenger mouse, or tell her in person?"
"Every time I've told someone 'hey, I almost died, so you know' without doing it in person they slap me when I see them next." Noburu's clone shook his head. "We'll just do it in person."
They walked in silence for perhaps nine steps before the shadow clone pulled Haruki in for a side-hug. "I'm glad you didn't end up a vegetable, by the way."
"As we established years ago, I'm not a half-tree mutant. It was never possible for me to be a vegetable." Haruki returned the clone's side hug. "And I have a good doctor. On that count, should I be offended that Junko seemed mostly alright with me nearly dying? I'm alright with me nearly dying, but it's weird that she is."
"Kaguya express love through violence – as soon as you're back to a hundred percent she'll wrestle you with knives just like she is with the boss."
As soon as the clone said that, there was a burst of broken wood and dust from the second floor of the ruined manor. Noburu and Junko, both bloody with multiple kunai in their upper bodies, emerged from the burst still in the midst of a wrassle. They hit the ground in the courtyard and vanished from view without stopping.
"See? Like that." The clone was all smiles. "We'll stitch you up good afterward, won't even leave scars unless you want 'em."
For a moment Haruki considered if being dead was the safer bet. But then he decided – life was short, he should at least indulge the Kaguya way of wrestling. Once.
And then, never again.
---
A bit of a breather chapter from the last two high-octane chapters. Orochimaru's learned the value of his labor and isn't afraid to withhold it now. Good for him! Haruki's learned that life doesn't have an end, but certain chapters do. Good for him!
Junko has learned Noburu loves her enough to stab her in the throat, and reciprocates. Good for her!
One of the things I found annoying about the ending of the Naruto series is that it technically ended in a victory for Danzo as Konoha ended up as the strongest village and de facto hegemon of the new world order. This is a status they are unlikely to lose in the near future given that they came out of the war with the least loses, made overwhelming gains in military power through the growth of the Rookie Nine, and have subverted the loyalties of the Bijuu and many high ranking ninjas through their personal relationship with Naruto. If Danzo really had the best intentions for Konoha than he would probably be very satisfied with the status quo at the series end.
- Location
- Norfolk, England
Let's not kid ourselves, he'd take one look at the situation and be mad beyond belief that he wasn't in the driver's seat.
PrognosticHannya
Far Too Enthusiastic About Etymology
- Pronouns
- She/Her
I can't imagine Hiruzen will be able to keep Danzo around after such an incredible fuck-up. So it'll be interesting to see what ROOT pulls in its death throes.
Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Coshiua
An Autistic Kyogre~!
- Location
- The Ocean
I'll look around to see if I can find the original drawing, but I'm not that hopeful I'll find it; I clean out old artwork every couple of months because I don't have much room to store it. I can make another drawing of him if I can't find it.That's @Coshiua 's decision -- I don't have the original pic anymore, changed computers. If they've still got the pic, they can slap it upon imgur and link it here again.
Ch 62
Chairtastic
Anything's a chair if you're brave enough
- Location
- Breakfast nook
- Pronouns
- He / Him / It
Chapter 62: Let it Out
---
Genin Nara
Shikaku held an awkward pose for the sake of his friend. Sweat beaded his forehead as he stood awkwardly on debris to keep the shadow possession jutsu in effect. A spike-shell turtle held half its body out of the water of a partially flooded cistern, unable to move since Shikaku's shadow held it in place.
Inoichi waded through the water and dunked himself every few steps. With every surfacing, he grew more distressed.
Choza stood behind Shikaku with a candelabra taken from the manor topside – the lit candles provided the light Shikaku needed for his shadow possession jutsu. They were on a stone island with an iron ladder that led up – the one dry space in the cistern.
When they'd started, the candles had been tall. Multiple failed attempts saw the candles at the end of their lifespans.
"Inoichi…." Shikaku ground out around his mouth as he struggled against the turtle.
"I'm looking!" Inoichi shouted back and slapped the water.
The turtle's pitiless eye watched Inoichi like he was the only thing in the whole world. Not even a glance at Shikaku or Choza.
Shikaku didn't need to guess what would happen perhaps at most a second after he lost control of the beast.
Every time Inoichi dove beneath the water and came up empty handed, Shikaku wanted to scream because it inched them closer to needing to fall back. Again. Shikaku and Choza hadn't even started to look for their assigned items because Inoichi's was in such a dangerous spot.
A mouse fell on Shikaku's face then quickly jumped away – which stunned him enough to let the shadow possession jutsu slip just a bit. In that bit, the spike-shell turtle had its jaws opened and centimeters away from where Inoichi was under the water.
Spike-shell turtles were fast.
Shikaku glared up at the steel ladder up to the roof where they had come from, and where the mouse had fallen from. Why did it all have to be so annoying? He contorted his neck to pull the spike-shell turtle's razor beak away from the water's surface.
Inoichi came up for air and immediately wasted it all on a girlish scream – the mouse had swam past him to climb on the turtle.
"Did you find it yet?" Choza called, because Shikaku had locked his jaw to keep his focus.
"I think so, but it's stuck!" Inoichi took another breath and dove down.
"We've got maybe five minutes on these candles!" But Inoichi had already dove, so Choza's words were unheard.
"Choza," Shikaku ground out as sweat started to get in his eyes. "Try… and put the candles somewhere, then go help….."
"You sure? Alright…." Choza shucked his backpack and set the candelabra on it before he waded out into the water.
The change in shadow direction made it ever so slightly harder to control the spike-shell turtle, but Shikaku held strong. With Choza in the water too, the spike-shell turtle pushed even harder – enough to ignore the mouse that crawled across its neck and head.
Then, all at once, it stopped. The turtle went totally limp.
In some ways, that was great news for Shikaku – he didn't have it actively fight him. However, the turtle no longer used its own muscles to haul itself above the water. Thus, Shikaku had to hold it in place.
Choza and Inoichi surfaced for air, then dove again, while Shikaku held the turtle in place. His face was red from the strain, sweat poured off him like he was in a sauna, his legs wobbled as the ponderous weight of the turtle wore him down.
"Guys… get outta the water," Shikaku muttered as his jutsu started to collapse from his exhaustion. His team was underwater at the time, they couldn't hear him. But he had no other way to warn them. "Guys, please…."
The turtle was too heavy, Shikaku couldn't manage to hold it. Gravity accomplished what strength of arms couldn't.
Shikaku's shadow possession jutsu failed, with the shadows that connected shinobi and vicious predator severed. All at once, the animal crashed beneath the water and sank.
Exhausted but desperate, Shikaku wobbled his way to the water's edge and pulled out a kunai. He needed to at least try to save his friends!
The mouse that had crawled over the turtle swam back to the cement pad and scurried up the ladder.
As Shikaku readied to jump in – his friends emerged.
"Got it!" Inoichi shouted, and held up a glass skull with a diamond in its jaw. He swam to the cement disk and hastily got out of the water.
Choza floated a moment more, his eyes on Shikaku. Eventually he swam back. "How'd you do it, Shikaku? I thought your folks didn't teach you how to kill with shadows yet."
Shikaku had fallen to his knees in relief. They were out of the water, with all their limbs. "Wha… what you talkin' bout?"
"The turtle's dead…." Choza helped Shikaku to his feet and let the Nara lean on him to the ladder. "It hit the water and sank to the bottom – blood came out of its nose and mouth, so it has to be dead."
Inoichi was busy in the midst of sealing his target, then rushed to follow them up the ladder. "Yeah – if you could kill it earlier, I don't know why you were so worried."
"I didn't kill it!" Shikaku struggled to haul himself up the ladder and shout at the same time – he was drained. "I thought… I thought it had figured out how to break my jutsu." He was in the lead for ladder climbing – with Choza helping him up as needed.
"Nah," a squeaky voice said from above them. "Just some good old tetrodatoxin."
Shikaku hauled himself up a rung to the top of the ladder and saw close to a dozen mice on their back legs, all with small cow-pattern vests on. In the midst of them was a rat that had a kunai pouch on their tail, a flak jacket, and an Otogakure headband of appropriate size.
"No injuries to report?" One of the mice said as they stowed a sewing needle like a sword being sheathed.
"Um… no?" Shikaku responded, his brain empty of thoughts except the repeated word: What?
"Who're you talking to Shikaku?" Choza called up from the ladder and nudged him. "Keep going, I'm hungry!"
"I'm seeing signs of chakra exhaustion – was this your mark, kid?" The rat spoke with a smooth voice – like one of those crooner singers from the radio.
Shikaku shook his head. His brain had recovered from the surprise of talking mice to piece together: Otogakure symbols, they were the summons of one of the Oto genin. The Oto genin had helped them, without payment.
Suspicious.
"Alright." The rat turned to some of the mice. "Go tell the boss we need a resupply here for the rookies. Assume all three just to be safe."
The mice saluted and scurried off.
"I hear you having a conversation up there, Shikaku!" Inoichi shouted. "Move it, so we can talk like normal people!"
Annoyed, tired, and spiteful, Shikaku forced himself out of the cistern ladder shaft, and waited patiently for Choza to ascend. When Inoichi ascended, and saw he was on eye level with mice and a rat the dandy predictably screamed like a girl and almost fell.
Vengeance took some of the edge off Shikaku's aches.
--
Ninja Rat Keigo
Back in action!
Keigo was back to the front, being the boss' number one summon. Akimitsu had gotten a lot of action while Noburu was on Mount Koryu, and afterward in the hospital. So Keigo had an unexpected vacation.
But he'd been summoned, and given a job: Get a bunch of Konoha ninja through a mission alive. A tall order, given how squirrely they could be.
He'd been given a mischief of ninja mice to command, and had them scout out the island. Wildlife that gave the humans trouble was quietly dealt with. The objects they hunted for were scouted out and brought to their attention.
The boss had asked him to personally make sure the Konoha rookies made it alright – and to come get him if they needed help.
Keigo and his mischief followed the rookies back to their campsite, a wrecked wagon in the middle of a road with a horse skeleton nearby. The wagon's wheels had all rotted away, and it lay flat on the ground.
Now, Keigo was a rat. His mischief were all mice. They had lived in squalid conditions before. But he had to physically stop his mischief from any comments about the wagon as the humans made themselves comfortable.
Questions like 'why next to a skeleton', 'why in the middle of the street', and 'why something with only two walls' would only serve to embarrass the poor squirrel-people. They were continentals, and they were kids. It was unreasonable to ask them to make good decisions.
"Alright, we've got your teammates sorted – let's hear what you two are looking for." Keigo asked and looked up at the large rookie and his exhausted friend. "Chop chop, we're on a time crunch here."
The exhausted one, Shikaku, arched his eyebrow. "What's the rush?"
"The boss is going to make ready to go back across the lake tomorrow," Keigo pointed off into the horizon. "So we're out here to make sure all you Konoha ninja get your stuff together by then so you can leave."
"Oh man, that'd be perfect." Choza, the large one, said with relief. "I'm almost out of food." He reached into his backpack and took out a packet of raisins. "Look at what we're forced to eat to get by."
Keigo and his mischief looked at the human in silence. Judging. Just like they judged the boss when his active dislike of raisins was revealed. Some humans had no sense of their good fortune.
"So anyway, what are you guys looking for?"
Once given the information on 'what' and 'where', Keigo's mischief went to work. The humans would still need to retrieve the items, but they'd be found in relatively short order.
As Keigo himself was about to leave to watch for the boss to send a shadow clone, he found himself picked up by the tail – that Shikaku kid had been raised in a barn, it seemed.
Shikaku held him up with narrowed eyes. "Why is your boss helping us with all this? What's he get out of it?"
Being held by the tail was painful, but Keigo was patient with the stupid children. "If I had to guess? I'd say he gets people who can accept help gracefully, without getting their egos offended. That's something of a problem with you human ninjas."
Shikaku arched an eyebrow. "Explain."
"I've been in this business long enough to see dozens of humans turn down help because of pride. For a while, I thought it was humans as a whole – but no." Keigo crossed his paws and shook his head. "Just you ninja. You're young, you haven't learned that stupid notion that pride is worth more than your life yet."
Shikaku averted his eyes and set Keigo down. "...Thanks, for telling me and for helping."
"Mhm, no problem. Don't pick me up that way again." Keigo scurried away before anyone else got ideas.
--
Genin Aburame
Hizashi had let them know about Noburu's ninja mice scurrying through the town. They offered indirect help to the other Konoha genin – mostly by the removal of debris or dangerous animals.
Once he knew to instruct his kikaichu, Shibi had them track the mice. Noburu may have instructed them to help, but it could also have been the setup for mischief. And there was the possibility that his teammate/brother's near-death experience had driven him absolutely insane.
People credited Madara's madness to his brother's murder by the Second Hokage, after all.
Yet, with the mice's help it seemed the Konoha genin without a Hyuuga on their team quickly found their items and returned to the manor where they'd crossed over to the island. Team Orochimaru was among the last to get there – Kushina's target had been a black pearl necklace that broke when she first found it.
In a basement with no natural light.
That had been quite possibly the least fun basement to go through – a list which included Orochimaru-sensei's family home with the human remains.
Once everyone was back, the Oto genin went around to offer medical treatment to anyone who was injured or chakra exhausted. Shibi never stopped being amazed that Kushina's grandmother had developed a technique for medics to refill a person's chakra supply but it had not been used widely in wartime until Lady Tsunade found it.
Her proposal that every squad should have a medical ninja only grew more sensible as time went on.
Noburu's shadow clones had created another group meal for everyone – something called 'French Tacos' with an oddly flavorful minced meat that Shibi couldn't identify. It was meat with cheese, onions, and a white sauce surrounded in a piece of flatbread that was grilled with a criss-cross pattern. The Akamichi boy and Inuzuka girl had the most out of any of them, but everyone seemed to enjoy the food.
"Alright, everyone good?" Noburu shouted from the second floor of the destroyed manor. He received thumbs up and confirmations from the crowd below, and continued. "Alright. When everyone's done eating, we're going to cross the lake again. Get ready to move as soon as you're done! Until then, smoke if you got 'em."
Shibi glanced at Kushina and Hizashi. Neither of them seemed happy at Noburu's nonchalance, but they sped up their eating anyway.
"Should… we talk to him? About what happened the other night?" Shibi focused his words at Hizashi, as they'd tried to talk to Kushina about it multiple times. She was unwilling to discuss what she'd done to Haruki's would-be murderer or Noburu's response.
"...When we're across the lake." Hizashi said and wiped his hands free of taco debris. "Doing so before or during would only make him unstable." He glanced at Kushina, as she finished her taco. "We might want to talk to Haruki. He's the injured party."
"Do either of you know what a bijuudama is?" Kushina asked suddenly. "Noburu mentioned using it to make Danzo explode, but I don't know anything about it. Neither does grandma Mito." She acted as if they hadn't spoken before she had.
Shibi opted to roll with it.
"I vaguely remember it as an orb the nine-tails could summon to lob at cities?" Shibi adjusted his glasses. "Supposedly it's bigger than the fox itself? But my great-grandparents didn't like to talk about the fox much."
"Bigger than the…. Shibi." Kushina looked at him like he'd grown a second head. "The fox is bigger than any mountain on the continent."
"Yes." Shibi met her disbelief with indifference. "And, allegedly, the bijuudama is even bigger. No idea why Noburu thinks he could use a technique only the nine-tails can do."
None of them even touched the madness that was using an orb meant to crush entire cities to explode one person. Noburu had likely been murderously vengeful when he said it – that drove normal people insane. For a madman like Noburu, it'd probably driven him into something worse than insanity.
Shibi internally proposed the name 'unsanity' for such a state, but he would never speak it to his friends. They would definitely laugh at the idea, regardless of the technical accuracy.
Once more, the genin assembled for a mad dash across the lake. Only this time, they had no moose to distract the grisly pike or spike-shell turtles with.
There were four people with the byakugan among the genin – and they were the ones who scoured the lake bed for turtles, pikes, and leeches. When the amount of wildlife was low – they did the only thing they could.
Run.
Like deer in a herd, they counted on numbers for safety.
Hizashi made masterful use of his wind-release taijutsu to strike animals that drew too close to the group. Kushina's chains functioned like whips to drive them off. And Shibi introduced more than one large aquatic eyeball to a kunai's point.
It wasn't as easy as the initial crossing, but no one died. Substitution jutsus had to be used more than once, but the worst anyone was injured once they were across the lake was more leeches and blood loss.
The lack of trees on the southern half of the training area visibly disturbed some of the teens that hadn't noticed it prior.
Yet it was all overshadowed by the appearance of several black-outfitted proctors and Danzo Shimura seemingly in the span of a blink. One moment, there was only an empty field – and the next, ninja stood there.
The Mad Dog of Konoha had a bag of toasted potato chips in hand, and took several from it as he spoke. "I take it… you have all finished your assign… ments?" Like he was an Akamichi, he finished the bag and callously discarded it. One of the proctors handed him another, which he tore into.
One by one, they turned in their scrolls. An air of anxiety surrounded them as they watched the examiner pig out while they hoped for a favorable outcome.
It wasn't to be.
As soon as the last scroll was turned in. Danzo discarded his fourth empty snack bag. A glass jar of jerky became his new object of gluttony, provided by a proctor.
"While I'm disgusted by your betrayal of the spirit of these exams…." Danzo paused to bite a stick of jerky into chunks slightly too big to be safe to swallow and chewed them up. "Fyou fund… a woophoe Ah cuwwant disquavafa fyou foh." A scrap of jerky escaped Danzo's mouth, which prompted him to drop his jar and crawl around on all fours until he found it again.
It was returned to his mouth. He hadn't swallowed the entire time.
Shibi glanced at his teammates and saw they were both confused and disgusted at the elder's behavior.
The proctors looked just as disgusted, but quickly steeled their features while Danzo picked up his jerky jar.
"The maximum… hlimit… for the third exam is… nahn." He ate another jerky stick, but swallowed. "I'm sorry, 'nine', I meant to say. To that end…." Danzo ate the last jerky stick from the jar then ran his fingers along the inside. Minute dust particles collected on his fingers, which were lapped up as if they were the most delicious thing in the world.
Shibi felt like he would never live down the shame of having such a man in his village's leadership.
"To that end… an elimination aspect will be added between this exam and the next." Danzo snapped his fingers at the proctors as he discarded the glass jar. It shattered on the ground behind him.
A box of cookies was handed to him next. Ugh.
"From this point forward, it's every genin for them… themselves." Danzo was slightly easier to understand with sandwich cookies in his mouth. Slightly. Partially. Mildly. Ten-percent-rely. "You will all compete in a simple footrace. Race from here, to the finish line at the Hokage tower. The first… first nine genin to complete the race advance to the next exam. On… your marks get set, go."
He delivered the last sentence with a mouth full of cookies. Yet even so, the moment the word 'go' was sounded Junko, Tsume, and Hizashi all ran like arrows loosed from a bow.
The race was on.
Shibi was faster than he had been, but he knew he'd have to push himself hard to make the qualifying nine. He ran like Junko's starving dogs were at his heels again.
The trees were gone, but smaller plants still remained. Bushes, grass patches, venus dogcatcher plants and so on. Muddy soil filled the gaps left by the trees – ready to suck in the legs of anyone foolish enough to walk on them.
As, regrettably, several genin found out.
"Human bullet tank!" Young Choza shouted, as he passed by Shibi in the form of a giant ball. For a while, it seemed he would join the leaders of the pack – but alas. His great speed lacked maneuverability, and he was unfamiliar with the terrain.
Shibi passed over the Akamichi, stuck in a creek bed still spinning uselessly.
He saw Hizashi's back ahead of him, with Hizashi's twin brother off to the side, just as they crested the Hokage Monument plateau. For perhaps a second, Shibi was stunned by the waterfall that had formed from the Third Hokage's face, before he started to shunshin down the mountain.
The waterfall had formed a pond at the bottom of the Hokage Monument that they had to run on to get to the city. Shibi could make out some figures in the leading runners. Junko, Noburu, Tsume, Kushina, and others.
They were in the village proper at last, and Shibi's legs began to burn. Hokage Tower wasn't far away – by his estimation, him and his teammates would be in the nine winners!
Hizashi and Hiashi were still the closest racers to Shibi that he could see as they approached a gate decorated with signs about 'victory' and 'finish'. Hizashi was ahead of his brother. Kushina was steps away from crossing – just behind Tsume.
Then, suddenly, Hizashi screamed and clutched his head. It was a scream of pain that Shibi had never heard so loud.
He tumbled to the ground and rolled.
In that moment Shibi forgot the race, he forgot the exam. He saw his teammate on the ground and skidded to a stop.
Hizashi wouldn't let him look at his head to see what the problem was – he rolled onto his knees and pressed his forehead into the dirt road like a painful kowtow.
Changes in air pressure let him know he'd been passed. Then suddenly one from the opposite direction came.
Shibi glanced up and saw Kushina next to him – just as worried for Hizashi.
He looked the way she had come and saw Hiashi on the other side of the finish line, eyes only for them, out of breath.
Shibi scowled behind his coat collar and focused on Hizashi again. The screaming had started to weaken into pained whimpers.
Neither he or Kushina seemed to care they'd lost. They refused to leave Hizashi's side until he could stand again.
---
Props to Kushina for ditching the finish line to help a teammate. In a combat situation, she'd 100% be dead just like Hizashi and Shibi, but hey.
Third Exams finalists:
...Somebody get Danzo away from the ice cream cake!
---
Genin Nara
Shikaku held an awkward pose for the sake of his friend. Sweat beaded his forehead as he stood awkwardly on debris to keep the shadow possession jutsu in effect. A spike-shell turtle held half its body out of the water of a partially flooded cistern, unable to move since Shikaku's shadow held it in place.
Inoichi waded through the water and dunked himself every few steps. With every surfacing, he grew more distressed.
Choza stood behind Shikaku with a candelabra taken from the manor topside – the lit candles provided the light Shikaku needed for his shadow possession jutsu. They were on a stone island with an iron ladder that led up – the one dry space in the cistern.
When they'd started, the candles had been tall. Multiple failed attempts saw the candles at the end of their lifespans.
"Inoichi…." Shikaku ground out around his mouth as he struggled against the turtle.
"I'm looking!" Inoichi shouted back and slapped the water.
The turtle's pitiless eye watched Inoichi like he was the only thing in the whole world. Not even a glance at Shikaku or Choza.
Shikaku didn't need to guess what would happen perhaps at most a second after he lost control of the beast.
Every time Inoichi dove beneath the water and came up empty handed, Shikaku wanted to scream because it inched them closer to needing to fall back. Again. Shikaku and Choza hadn't even started to look for their assigned items because Inoichi's was in such a dangerous spot.
A mouse fell on Shikaku's face then quickly jumped away – which stunned him enough to let the shadow possession jutsu slip just a bit. In that bit, the spike-shell turtle had its jaws opened and centimeters away from where Inoichi was under the water.
Spike-shell turtles were fast.
Shikaku glared up at the steel ladder up to the roof where they had come from, and where the mouse had fallen from. Why did it all have to be so annoying? He contorted his neck to pull the spike-shell turtle's razor beak away from the water's surface.
Inoichi came up for air and immediately wasted it all on a girlish scream – the mouse had swam past him to climb on the turtle.
"Did you find it yet?" Choza called, because Shikaku had locked his jaw to keep his focus.
"I think so, but it's stuck!" Inoichi took another breath and dove down.
"We've got maybe five minutes on these candles!" But Inoichi had already dove, so Choza's words were unheard.
"Choza," Shikaku ground out as sweat started to get in his eyes. "Try… and put the candles somewhere, then go help….."
"You sure? Alright…." Choza shucked his backpack and set the candelabra on it before he waded out into the water.
The change in shadow direction made it ever so slightly harder to control the spike-shell turtle, but Shikaku held strong. With Choza in the water too, the spike-shell turtle pushed even harder – enough to ignore the mouse that crawled across its neck and head.
Then, all at once, it stopped. The turtle went totally limp.
In some ways, that was great news for Shikaku – he didn't have it actively fight him. However, the turtle no longer used its own muscles to haul itself above the water. Thus, Shikaku had to hold it in place.
Choza and Inoichi surfaced for air, then dove again, while Shikaku held the turtle in place. His face was red from the strain, sweat poured off him like he was in a sauna, his legs wobbled as the ponderous weight of the turtle wore him down.
"Guys… get outta the water," Shikaku muttered as his jutsu started to collapse from his exhaustion. His team was underwater at the time, they couldn't hear him. But he had no other way to warn them. "Guys, please…."
The turtle was too heavy, Shikaku couldn't manage to hold it. Gravity accomplished what strength of arms couldn't.
Shikaku's shadow possession jutsu failed, with the shadows that connected shinobi and vicious predator severed. All at once, the animal crashed beneath the water and sank.
Exhausted but desperate, Shikaku wobbled his way to the water's edge and pulled out a kunai. He needed to at least try to save his friends!
The mouse that had crawled over the turtle swam back to the cement pad and scurried up the ladder.
As Shikaku readied to jump in – his friends emerged.
"Got it!" Inoichi shouted, and held up a glass skull with a diamond in its jaw. He swam to the cement disk and hastily got out of the water.
Choza floated a moment more, his eyes on Shikaku. Eventually he swam back. "How'd you do it, Shikaku? I thought your folks didn't teach you how to kill with shadows yet."
Shikaku had fallen to his knees in relief. They were out of the water, with all their limbs. "Wha… what you talkin' bout?"
"The turtle's dead…." Choza helped Shikaku to his feet and let the Nara lean on him to the ladder. "It hit the water and sank to the bottom – blood came out of its nose and mouth, so it has to be dead."
Inoichi was busy in the midst of sealing his target, then rushed to follow them up the ladder. "Yeah – if you could kill it earlier, I don't know why you were so worried."
"I didn't kill it!" Shikaku struggled to haul himself up the ladder and shout at the same time – he was drained. "I thought… I thought it had figured out how to break my jutsu." He was in the lead for ladder climbing – with Choza helping him up as needed.
"Nah," a squeaky voice said from above them. "Just some good old tetrodatoxin."
Shikaku hauled himself up a rung to the top of the ladder and saw close to a dozen mice on their back legs, all with small cow-pattern vests on. In the midst of them was a rat that had a kunai pouch on their tail, a flak jacket, and an Otogakure headband of appropriate size.
"No injuries to report?" One of the mice said as they stowed a sewing needle like a sword being sheathed.
"Um… no?" Shikaku responded, his brain empty of thoughts except the repeated word: What?
"Who're you talking to Shikaku?" Choza called up from the ladder and nudged him. "Keep going, I'm hungry!"
"I'm seeing signs of chakra exhaustion – was this your mark, kid?" The rat spoke with a smooth voice – like one of those crooner singers from the radio.
Shikaku shook his head. His brain had recovered from the surprise of talking mice to piece together: Otogakure symbols, they were the summons of one of the Oto genin. The Oto genin had helped them, without payment.
Suspicious.
"Alright." The rat turned to some of the mice. "Go tell the boss we need a resupply here for the rookies. Assume all three just to be safe."
The mice saluted and scurried off.
"I hear you having a conversation up there, Shikaku!" Inoichi shouted. "Move it, so we can talk like normal people!"
Annoyed, tired, and spiteful, Shikaku forced himself out of the cistern ladder shaft, and waited patiently for Choza to ascend. When Inoichi ascended, and saw he was on eye level with mice and a rat the dandy predictably screamed like a girl and almost fell.
Vengeance took some of the edge off Shikaku's aches.
--
Ninja Rat Keigo
Back in action!
Keigo was back to the front, being the boss' number one summon. Akimitsu had gotten a lot of action while Noburu was on Mount Koryu, and afterward in the hospital. So Keigo had an unexpected vacation.
But he'd been summoned, and given a job: Get a bunch of Konoha ninja through a mission alive. A tall order, given how squirrely they could be.
He'd been given a mischief of ninja mice to command, and had them scout out the island. Wildlife that gave the humans trouble was quietly dealt with. The objects they hunted for were scouted out and brought to their attention.
The boss had asked him to personally make sure the Konoha rookies made it alright – and to come get him if they needed help.
Keigo and his mischief followed the rookies back to their campsite, a wrecked wagon in the middle of a road with a horse skeleton nearby. The wagon's wheels had all rotted away, and it lay flat on the ground.
Now, Keigo was a rat. His mischief were all mice. They had lived in squalid conditions before. But he had to physically stop his mischief from any comments about the wagon as the humans made themselves comfortable.
Questions like 'why next to a skeleton', 'why in the middle of the street', and 'why something with only two walls' would only serve to embarrass the poor squirrel-people. They were continentals, and they were kids. It was unreasonable to ask them to make good decisions.
"Alright, we've got your teammates sorted – let's hear what you two are looking for." Keigo asked and looked up at the large rookie and his exhausted friend. "Chop chop, we're on a time crunch here."
The exhausted one, Shikaku, arched his eyebrow. "What's the rush?"
"The boss is going to make ready to go back across the lake tomorrow," Keigo pointed off into the horizon. "So we're out here to make sure all you Konoha ninja get your stuff together by then so you can leave."
"Oh man, that'd be perfect." Choza, the large one, said with relief. "I'm almost out of food." He reached into his backpack and took out a packet of raisins. "Look at what we're forced to eat to get by."
Keigo and his mischief looked at the human in silence. Judging. Just like they judged the boss when his active dislike of raisins was revealed. Some humans had no sense of their good fortune.
"So anyway, what are you guys looking for?"
Once given the information on 'what' and 'where', Keigo's mischief went to work. The humans would still need to retrieve the items, but they'd be found in relatively short order.
As Keigo himself was about to leave to watch for the boss to send a shadow clone, he found himself picked up by the tail – that Shikaku kid had been raised in a barn, it seemed.
Shikaku held him up with narrowed eyes. "Why is your boss helping us with all this? What's he get out of it?"
Being held by the tail was painful, but Keigo was patient with the stupid children. "If I had to guess? I'd say he gets people who can accept help gracefully, without getting their egos offended. That's something of a problem with you human ninjas."
Shikaku arched an eyebrow. "Explain."
"I've been in this business long enough to see dozens of humans turn down help because of pride. For a while, I thought it was humans as a whole – but no." Keigo crossed his paws and shook his head. "Just you ninja. You're young, you haven't learned that stupid notion that pride is worth more than your life yet."
Shikaku averted his eyes and set Keigo down. "...Thanks, for telling me and for helping."
"Mhm, no problem. Don't pick me up that way again." Keigo scurried away before anyone else got ideas.
--
Genin Aburame
Hizashi had let them know about Noburu's ninja mice scurrying through the town. They offered indirect help to the other Konoha genin – mostly by the removal of debris or dangerous animals.
Once he knew to instruct his kikaichu, Shibi had them track the mice. Noburu may have instructed them to help, but it could also have been the setup for mischief. And there was the possibility that his teammate/brother's near-death experience had driven him absolutely insane.
People credited Madara's madness to his brother's murder by the Second Hokage, after all.
Yet, with the mice's help it seemed the Konoha genin without a Hyuuga on their team quickly found their items and returned to the manor where they'd crossed over to the island. Team Orochimaru was among the last to get there – Kushina's target had been a black pearl necklace that broke when she first found it.
In a basement with no natural light.
That had been quite possibly the least fun basement to go through – a list which included Orochimaru-sensei's family home with the human remains.
Once everyone was back, the Oto genin went around to offer medical treatment to anyone who was injured or chakra exhausted. Shibi never stopped being amazed that Kushina's grandmother had developed a technique for medics to refill a person's chakra supply but it had not been used widely in wartime until Lady Tsunade found it.
Her proposal that every squad should have a medical ninja only grew more sensible as time went on.
Noburu's shadow clones had created another group meal for everyone – something called 'French Tacos' with an oddly flavorful minced meat that Shibi couldn't identify. It was meat with cheese, onions, and a white sauce surrounded in a piece of flatbread that was grilled with a criss-cross pattern. The Akamichi boy and Inuzuka girl had the most out of any of them, but everyone seemed to enjoy the food.
"Alright, everyone good?" Noburu shouted from the second floor of the destroyed manor. He received thumbs up and confirmations from the crowd below, and continued. "Alright. When everyone's done eating, we're going to cross the lake again. Get ready to move as soon as you're done! Until then, smoke if you got 'em."
Shibi glanced at Kushina and Hizashi. Neither of them seemed happy at Noburu's nonchalance, but they sped up their eating anyway.
"Should… we talk to him? About what happened the other night?" Shibi focused his words at Hizashi, as they'd tried to talk to Kushina about it multiple times. She was unwilling to discuss what she'd done to Haruki's would-be murderer or Noburu's response.
"...When we're across the lake." Hizashi said and wiped his hands free of taco debris. "Doing so before or during would only make him unstable." He glanced at Kushina, as she finished her taco. "We might want to talk to Haruki. He's the injured party."
"Do either of you know what a bijuudama is?" Kushina asked suddenly. "Noburu mentioned using it to make Danzo explode, but I don't know anything about it. Neither does grandma Mito." She acted as if they hadn't spoken before she had.
Shibi opted to roll with it.
"I vaguely remember it as an orb the nine-tails could summon to lob at cities?" Shibi adjusted his glasses. "Supposedly it's bigger than the fox itself? But my great-grandparents didn't like to talk about the fox much."
"Bigger than the…. Shibi." Kushina looked at him like he'd grown a second head. "The fox is bigger than any mountain on the continent."
"Yes." Shibi met her disbelief with indifference. "And, allegedly, the bijuudama is even bigger. No idea why Noburu thinks he could use a technique only the nine-tails can do."
None of them even touched the madness that was using an orb meant to crush entire cities to explode one person. Noburu had likely been murderously vengeful when he said it – that drove normal people insane. For a madman like Noburu, it'd probably driven him into something worse than insanity.
Shibi internally proposed the name 'unsanity' for such a state, but he would never speak it to his friends. They would definitely laugh at the idea, regardless of the technical accuracy.
Once more, the genin assembled for a mad dash across the lake. Only this time, they had no moose to distract the grisly pike or spike-shell turtles with.
There were four people with the byakugan among the genin – and they were the ones who scoured the lake bed for turtles, pikes, and leeches. When the amount of wildlife was low – they did the only thing they could.
Run.
Like deer in a herd, they counted on numbers for safety.
Hizashi made masterful use of his wind-release taijutsu to strike animals that drew too close to the group. Kushina's chains functioned like whips to drive them off. And Shibi introduced more than one large aquatic eyeball to a kunai's point.
It wasn't as easy as the initial crossing, but no one died. Substitution jutsus had to be used more than once, but the worst anyone was injured once they were across the lake was more leeches and blood loss.
The lack of trees on the southern half of the training area visibly disturbed some of the teens that hadn't noticed it prior.
Yet it was all overshadowed by the appearance of several black-outfitted proctors and Danzo Shimura seemingly in the span of a blink. One moment, there was only an empty field – and the next, ninja stood there.
The Mad Dog of Konoha had a bag of toasted potato chips in hand, and took several from it as he spoke. "I take it… you have all finished your assign… ments?" Like he was an Akamichi, he finished the bag and callously discarded it. One of the proctors handed him another, which he tore into.
One by one, they turned in their scrolls. An air of anxiety surrounded them as they watched the examiner pig out while they hoped for a favorable outcome.
It wasn't to be.
As soon as the last scroll was turned in. Danzo discarded his fourth empty snack bag. A glass jar of jerky became his new object of gluttony, provided by a proctor.
"While I'm disgusted by your betrayal of the spirit of these exams…." Danzo paused to bite a stick of jerky into chunks slightly too big to be safe to swallow and chewed them up. "Fyou fund… a woophoe Ah cuwwant disquavafa fyou foh." A scrap of jerky escaped Danzo's mouth, which prompted him to drop his jar and crawl around on all fours until he found it again.
It was returned to his mouth. He hadn't swallowed the entire time.
Shibi glanced at his teammates and saw they were both confused and disgusted at the elder's behavior.
The proctors looked just as disgusted, but quickly steeled their features while Danzo picked up his jerky jar.
"The maximum… hlimit… for the third exam is… nahn." He ate another jerky stick, but swallowed. "I'm sorry, 'nine', I meant to say. To that end…." Danzo ate the last jerky stick from the jar then ran his fingers along the inside. Minute dust particles collected on his fingers, which were lapped up as if they were the most delicious thing in the world.
Shibi felt like he would never live down the shame of having such a man in his village's leadership.
"To that end… an elimination aspect will be added between this exam and the next." Danzo snapped his fingers at the proctors as he discarded the glass jar. It shattered on the ground behind him.
A box of cookies was handed to him next. Ugh.
"From this point forward, it's every genin for them… themselves." Danzo was slightly easier to understand with sandwich cookies in his mouth. Slightly. Partially. Mildly. Ten-percent-rely. "You will all compete in a simple footrace. Race from here, to the finish line at the Hokage tower. The first… first nine genin to complete the race advance to the next exam. On… your marks get set, go."
He delivered the last sentence with a mouth full of cookies. Yet even so, the moment the word 'go' was sounded Junko, Tsume, and Hizashi all ran like arrows loosed from a bow.
The race was on.
Shibi was faster than he had been, but he knew he'd have to push himself hard to make the qualifying nine. He ran like Junko's starving dogs were at his heels again.
The trees were gone, but smaller plants still remained. Bushes, grass patches, venus dogcatcher plants and so on. Muddy soil filled the gaps left by the trees – ready to suck in the legs of anyone foolish enough to walk on them.
As, regrettably, several genin found out.
"Human bullet tank!" Young Choza shouted, as he passed by Shibi in the form of a giant ball. For a while, it seemed he would join the leaders of the pack – but alas. His great speed lacked maneuverability, and he was unfamiliar with the terrain.
Shibi passed over the Akamichi, stuck in a creek bed still spinning uselessly.
He saw Hizashi's back ahead of him, with Hizashi's twin brother off to the side, just as they crested the Hokage Monument plateau. For perhaps a second, Shibi was stunned by the waterfall that had formed from the Third Hokage's face, before he started to shunshin down the mountain.
The waterfall had formed a pond at the bottom of the Hokage Monument that they had to run on to get to the city. Shibi could make out some figures in the leading runners. Junko, Noburu, Tsume, Kushina, and others.
They were in the village proper at last, and Shibi's legs began to burn. Hokage Tower wasn't far away – by his estimation, him and his teammates would be in the nine winners!
Hizashi and Hiashi were still the closest racers to Shibi that he could see as they approached a gate decorated with signs about 'victory' and 'finish'. Hizashi was ahead of his brother. Kushina was steps away from crossing – just behind Tsume.
Then, suddenly, Hizashi screamed and clutched his head. It was a scream of pain that Shibi had never heard so loud.
He tumbled to the ground and rolled.
In that moment Shibi forgot the race, he forgot the exam. He saw his teammate on the ground and skidded to a stop.
Hizashi wouldn't let him look at his head to see what the problem was – he rolled onto his knees and pressed his forehead into the dirt road like a painful kowtow.
Changes in air pressure let him know he'd been passed. Then suddenly one from the opposite direction came.
Shibi glanced up and saw Kushina next to him – just as worried for Hizashi.
He looked the way she had come and saw Hiashi on the other side of the finish line, eyes only for them, out of breath.
Shibi scowled behind his coat collar and focused on Hizashi again. The screaming had started to weaken into pained whimpers.
Neither he or Kushina seemed to care they'd lost. They refused to leave Hizashi's side until he could stand again.
---
Props to Kushina for ditching the finish line to help a teammate. In a combat situation, she'd 100% be dead just like Hizashi and Shibi, but hey.
Third Exams finalists:
- Sitaram Hyuuga.
- Hiashi Hyuuga.
- Tsume Inuzuka.
- Noburu Jiang.
- Junko Kaguya.
- Toya Sarutobi.
- Ji Ko.
- Vinh Kamiya.
- Sima Uchiha.
...Somebody get Danzo away from the ice cream cake!