Shards of Ideas and Fragments of Stories

[SilviaNorton]

AN: Takes place during the canon Butcher Battle. Lisa inherits after her plan causes the Butcher to die, and promptly fucks off to protect her friends. Taylor ends up following Lisa, determined to help her friend at any cost.


With a primal scream, the Butcher pulls the trigger, before collapsing on the beach. We freeze, waiting for the signs that one of us inherited. Waiting for a sign that Lisa's plan failed.

"Shit." Lisa's voice echos from my headset.

I can feel my heart collapsing into my stomach. Not her. Please, anyone but her.

"Should have known. Fuck."

I turn wordlessly before running towards our HQ. The plan if one of us was infected was to trap ourselves long enough to figure something out but... I know that none of us would have gone through with it. I know I wouldn't. As much as getting rid of the Butcher for good is important, I would almost rather try and wrangle the voices into doing something useful. Like chasing the Nine.

"Lisa?" I ask, panting slightly as I run through the city, ignoring the calls of my teammates.

"Hey Taylor. I know we had a plan for if one of us got infected but..." She sounds apologetic and slightly panicked.

"It's fine Lisa, just wait for me." I keep my voice level, hoping against hope she doesn't do something stupid.

"Goodbye Taylor." She says, before the broadcast clicks off. She sounded regretful. Hurt.

I run. I run and I run and I try not to think about what I'm doing.

I burst into the HQ and find the mercs incapacitated. She didn't kill them, likely because there hasn't been enough time for the bleed through to set in. Or the insanity, however it works. We have a few theories, but all of them assume that it takes time to fully set in.

Lisa is gone.

I rip off my mask, fall to my knees, and sob.

*****​

"Taylor, this is crazy." Brian says, blocking the doorway out of my base.

"Maybe, but it's what I'm going to do." I stare up at him, defiant and determined.

"She's the Butcher! She's insane!" He protests, practically pleading.

"She's my fucking friend!" I snap, glaring at the man I once thought I loved. "She would do the same for me!"

"They're the Teeth! Cannibals and serial killers!" He shouts, the rest of the team gathering to watch our confrontation.

I clench my fist. None of them agreed with me. None of them wanted to risk it. Some fucking friends.

My mind drifts to the paper Dinah gave me.

Cut ties.

Was this what she meant?

Even if it isn't, my mind is made up. I call my swarm around me, buzzing and chittering with barely repressed anger.

"Move Brian." My voice is flat.

He steps back, eyes wide.

"If none of you want to help me, you can stay here and take care of the city. I've already talked to Accord, and he's willing to humor me on this." I say, making eye contact with them one after another.

Accord took a little convincing, but the promise of a Butcher that could at least be pointed towards his enemies instead of him was ultimately what won him over. Plus, he would have more influence over the portal with me distracted by this project.

"Taylor... why?" Brian says, finally getting the message.

I look at him,my gaze softening minutely.

"Because she's my best friend. Nobody else stuck with me the way she did, even when I was making the stupidest mistakes. The least I can do is stick with her through this." I walk forward, and give him a peck on the cheek.

"I'll see you around Brian." I say, before walking out the door. I give Rachel a nod on the way out, and she gives me one in return. She understands why I have to do this. Lisa is part of my pack. Our pack. She may not agree, but she understands.

Alec gives me a rueful smile as I pass. "Go get the girl dork."

I flip him off with a scowl, which just makes him smile.

Aisha gives me a hug. "What he said. Also, invite me to the wedding."

I flip her off too, and stalk out the door. I pause on the threshold and look back. "I'll keep in touch. If you need help, I'll be there."

With that I leave, heading for Boston. The most recent sighting of the Teeth.

*****​

I spread my bugs, subtly mapping out the Teeth's base. Lisa was there, pacing back and forth and muttering to herself.

"New York? ... Too big ... Shut up...." A few fragments of her mutters filter through my bugs, and I turn my attention to the rest of the base.

Hemorrhagia was in the kitchen, tending to a pot of chili. Reaver and Vex are near what looks like an arena, laughing and jeering at a pair of combatants. Spree appears to be high out of his mind in a filthy rec room.

Steeling my resolve, I march forward, bag slung over my shoulder. Using my bugs, I carefully and subtly distract the guards and various minions, slipping through gaps in their lackluster perimeter. It's even easier once I'm inside the converted warehouse. Nobody sees me, no alarms are set off, and Lisa hasn't once paused her agitated pacing.

Taking a deep breath, I push open the door to her quarters. Her face snaps towards the door, instinctively drawing and pointing a handgun my way before she even registers who is bothering her.

I pause, looking directly into her eyes. She's slightly ragged, hair held back in a messy ponytail. Her clothing is dirty and spotted with fresh blood, and her hand that isn't holding the pistol at my face is twitching with agitation. Her green eyes widen as she processes my appearance.

"Hey Lisa." I say, giving a genuine if wavering smile.

"Taylor... What..." She says, her mouth flapping uselessly.

I drop my bag on the ground, slow and exaggerated, and begin to walk towards her, hands visibly empty.

"Why are you here?" She asks, eyes suddenly hardening. She grips the gun tighter, although I notice her finger is off the trigger.

"Why?" I say, taking another step forward. "I'm here for you obviously. I'm not about to let you run off and deal with this alone."

Her expression falters, disbelief and suspicion warring with hope and affection. "That's... What about the plan? Getting rid of the Butcher?" She asks, although I know her power has already given her the answer.

"Plans change. You're more important." I say, stepping past her extended gun. She doesn't shift to keep it pointed at me, instead staring at me and wincing occasionally. "Even if you did try to break a promise with me." I add, injecting some humor into my voice.

Her eyes narrow. "What promise?"

"No goodbyes, remember?" I say softly, before pulling her into a hug.

She tenses, her entire body freezing, before her arms wrap around me in a crushing hug. Her body shakes as tears leak from her eyes, and I let myself melt against her.

"I'm not going anywhere Lisa. I want to help you, just like you helped me."

She lets out a sob, and we stay like that for a couple minutes. When we break apart, there is a cruel light in her eyes.

"Right, I suppose I can't spend all my time crying about this. What do you say we get everyone together and figure out what to do next?" Her grin is wide and slightly feral. I feel my heart flip slightly at the look she gives me, which somehow causes her to grin wider.

"Sounds good to me." I say with a smile, before schooling my expression as she walks past me. I fall into step behind her, letting my swarm glide along in a show of force.

I think of the horrors the Teeth have committed, and the horrors they will continue to commit. Joining the Teeth makes me complacent at best, and an active participant at worst. I'm not so naive as to think that I won't have to dirty my hands.

My mind flashes to Lung, and how I carved his eyes out. To Valfor, and how the maggots burrowed into her eyes. Triumph, dying beneath me after I attacked him in his home.

"Don't worry Taylor, you'll fit right in." Lisa says, looking back with a brittle smile.

I return her smile with one equally brittle. We're both damned a thousand times over, but at least we're together.

*****​

Two weeks with the Teeth, and I'm already getting used to it. One by one I've crossed lines that I never expected too. I've killed four people personally, one of them with my bare hands. I did drugs, something I had always sworn to never do. I almost didn't but Lisa gave me a look of desperate pleading, so I joined her.

The worst part was that I enjoyed it, and I know she'll talk me into doing it again.

The other capes were suspicious of me at first, but they've warmed up to me. Reaver chilled out when I proved myself in the arena. Hemorrhagia hasn't forgiven me for our attack in Brockton Bay, but she's accepted me as an ally nonetheless. Spree stopped heckling me after I did drugs for the first time.

Animos still looks at me funny when he thinks I can't see him, but he's stopped grumbling about how I'll bring the heroes down on them. Vex started flirting with me almost day one, which was mortifying at the time. Her continued flirtations are more flattering, especially when Lisa gets jealous.

I may be gayer than I thought I was. All it took was taking mind altering drugs to figure it out.

"Hey Tay." Lisa flops down onto the couch next to me, her eyes slightly red from the blunt between her fingers.

"Hey Lise." I say, smiling at her as she sidles up next to me. She's gotten a lot more affectionate since inheriting, not that I mind, really. She's warm, soft, and cute. Well, she's also a bit harder. The various Brute ratings have given her some dense muscles, and she doesn't seem to build much body fat no matter what she eats.

"Wanna smoke?" She asks, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes.

I give her a suspicious glance. "It's just weed?" I ask, receiving a nod in response. "Sure."

Defying my expectations, she takes a deep puff off the blunt instead of passing it over. Her free hand then snakes around the back of my head, pulling me towards her. Before I can react, her lips are sealed against mine and smoke is moving from her mouth to mine.

The kiss is electric, intensified by the drug tingling through my system. A part of me wants to withdraw, but it's overruled by the piece of me that's processing the fact that Lisa is kissing me.

She pulls back, a wisp of smoke escaping as the seal of our lips is broken. I breathe in, letting the smoke fill my lungs, before breathing out. I look at Lisa in shock.

"I thought your power..." I say, remembering what she said about her and relationships.

She shrugs. "Wasn't my power, I was just asexual."

I blink, processing the information as the weed suffuses my bloodstream. "Isn't that just semantics?" I ask, still confused.

She shrugs. "Yeah, back when it was just me it kinda was. Now though?" She looks me in the eye, a vulpine grin stretching across her face. My eyes are drawn to her lips. "The Butcher is always Bisexual."

She leans in and kisses me again, all pretenses vanishing.

Inheriting changed her orientation. Part of me is intrigued, part of me is horrified, part of me is baffled, and the rest of me drowns those parts out as I return her kiss. I don't know how long I've had a crush on Lisa. I never let myself think about it, partially because I assumed I was straight, and partially because I knew she wasn't interested.

Now? With her initiating?

I let myself be lost to her ministrations, her hands wandering across my body and slipping under my clothes.

"B-bedroom," I gasp out between ravenous kisses. She scoops me up in her arms, carrying me away to the sound of wolf whistles and cheers from the Teeth that were sharing the common room with us.

Once the door closes behind us, she throws me on the bed, and proves to me that, without a shadow of a doubt, I am bisexual.

****​

A phone rings. My phone. The phone I keep exclusively to contact the Undersiders. I groan, reaching over the sleeping body of Vex and snatching it off the table.

"Better be important." Lisa says from her position behind me.

"It's the Undersiders." I say, flipping it over and holding it to my ear. "Leaf B."

"Banana N" Comes Aisha's voice. "Hey so, we've got a bit of a problem."

"What kind of problem?" I rub my face, hoping that I can just give some advice and go back to sleeping with Lisa and tonight's rotating bedmate.

"A Bastard Son shaped problem. He seems to think the city is an easy target and well..."

I slump down slightly. "Fuck."

Lisa gets up, my eyes following her as she reaches for scattered bits of clothing. "Yeah, we could really use some back up. We've already got our hands full integrating the Heartbroken, and Bitch is off on the other side of the portal."

I get out of bed with a sigh, internally appreciating the look Lisa shoots me as I move towards our dresser. "We'll be there as soon as we can. Maybe three days?"

"Great, I'll let the- wait, we?" She suddenly halts.

"Yeah, we." Lisa plucks the phone from my hands and speaks to Aisha with a grin on her face. "The Teeth are on their way, and when we get there, Bastard Son will die."

There is silence, before Lisa speaks again with a grin. "And Aisha? This better be a good fight, because I was enjoying a nap with my girlfriend when you called."

A faint "oh shit." echoes from the phone as Lisa lets out a cackling laugh. She snaps the phone shut with a grin, and starts strapping on her armor. "Wake everyone up, the Teeth ride to war!"

I can't help the grin that spreads across my face at her expression. Barely a month, and I'm already itching for violence and bloodshed. A part of me laments the humanity I've discarded, but the rest of me focuses on Lisa.

She doesn't say it, but I know that me coming here saved her. Saved her from isolation and madness. I may have fallen, broken the last of my morals over my knee, but I can honestly say it's been worth it. I would do anything for her smile, and something about that scares me.

Deep within me, there's a truth I don't want to admit. A truth that neither of us speak of. When Lisa dies and the mantle passes on, I will kill the next inheritor myself. I will never be separated from Lisa again, even if it costs me what few shreds of humanity I have left.

"Hey, let's go say hi to your ex-boyfriend," Lisa says with a grin.

I snort with amusement, before leaning in to give her a kiss. "Maybe I'll introduce you to my dad while we're in town. "Hey dad, I'm dating one of the most violent serial killers in the nation." I'm sure that'll go over well."

She laughs, before grabbing the front of my shirt and pulling me forward. "If you actually do introduce me, I'll..." She whispers things into my ears that cause me to violently blush.

"Ah... we'll make some time for that then." I stammer out.

"Good." She says, before her expression abruptly softens. "You need closure."

I nod, dropping my eyes down towards the ground. She leans in and gives me another kiss.

"I'll be there. No matter what."

I smile, a softer and more genuine smile than the feral things that have adorned my face as of late.

"Thanks Lise."

With the smile that originally seduced me into villainy, Lisa stalks out to rouse the Teeth to war. With the promise of violence and bloodshed, I follow after her, leaving another piece of myself behind for the woman I love.

*****
​

AN: I like the idea of Lisa becoming the Butcher and Taylor joining the Teeth to be with her. If I were to expand this, I would have more scenes of Taylor getting corrupted and losing herself. Probably showing her first Teeth murder, her first time doing drugs, and her continuing escalation of violence. Would also add more scenes of Lisa struggling with the chorus. Taylor and Lisa talking and actually working things out in regards to them. Probably a scene (or multiple scenes) where Lisa goes too far, and Taylor struggles to deal with it for a bit.

Oh right. This is my first time posting on this site, but I have stuff written elsewhere. I have stories on Ao3 under the name SilviaNorton (which will hopefully be my name on this site as well, assuming the mods don't have a reason to deny the change.) Some of those might end up migrated here as well, but at least for now you can find them there.
One series is a collection of snippets based on Worm/Dota 2 crosses. Another is a canon divergence Smugbug where Taylor doesn't surrender (WIP and currently stalled a little.) Finally, I have a Punchbuggy Story where an unpowered Taylor ends up going to arcadia instead of getting the locker, and ends up meeting and dating Victoria. There is a sequel planned for that story, and work on the outline/first draft is ongoing.

 

[SilviaNorton]

"... and with the recent increase in drug sales, we should start profiting in my territory within the month," I say, standing stock still as my bugs tear themselves apart outside.

Coil stares at the report I put in front of him for a moment, before nodding in satisfaction. "Excellent. Once again, you've exceeded my expectations, Miss Hebert."

My skin crawls as he uses my name, not that I let it show. No weakness. I can't give in. I'm doing this for her. I'm doing everything for her. "Thank you, sir."

Coil stares at me, waiting for me to leave. "Was there something else?"

My bugs vibrate. He promised. He promised. "I'd like to see her, as we agreed."

Coil inclines his head, as if he had expected just that. Of course he had, the absolute bastard. "Of course, you need only ask. Pitter will open the door for you. You can have an hour, and I trust you need no reminder of the rules?"

I jerk my head, remembering the last time we tried to push things. She puts on a brave face about it, but neither of us have pushed him since. Satisfied, he waves a hand towards the door, and I step out into the hall.

My footfalls echo through the empty halls, and I make a reminder to revisit the soles of my boots. I can make them softer, silenter. Another tool in my box for when I move to free her from his clutches. Another bullet in the gun.

At least this time the Nine won't ruin all my plans.

"Oh, Skitter, what are you-" Sundancer cuts herself off, suddenly realizing what she's asking. Her expression morphs from confusion to pity. I suppress the rage. It's not fair to her, yet I can't help but remember how she didn't try to help. How she didn't care.

"I'm going to see her. Is she well?" I ask, already knowing the answer.

"I don't know, I haven't..." she trails off, a guilt stricken expression adorning her face.

I clench my teeth under my mask. "It's fine. I know you don't care about her."

I walk away, ignoring the stammering protests of the girl behind me. I used to like her. Thought that she was a good person underneath it all. The one good Traveler, I thought. I was wrong, of course. None of them are good.

At least Krouse understands me, even if sometimes I think it would be better if he didn't.

I reach the door to her cell, wrapping on the cold steel three times in a pattern. Mr Pitter opens the door, smiling in his blank placid way, before waving me into the observation room. "Welcome Miss Skitter, have you come to visit my charge? She'll appreciate it, she so looks forward to your visits."

I nod, my mouth dry as I avoid looking through the one way mirror. "How is she?"

His blank eyes never waver, although he lets a sheepish affect creep into his expression. "As well as can be expected. The headaches are bothering her again, but it's a good day. Coil hasn't needed her yet, and she's due for another dose. She ah, asked if you could give it to her, if you were here. She trusts you more than me."

I nod, accepting the colorful pills from the blank faced man. A month ago I would have balked at doing this. A month ago I had more hope that my plan would work.

A month ago I had a plan.

"See that she takes them, will you?" he says.

For a second, I want to kill him. Beat his face into a pulp, drown him in insects, rip off his fingers one by one. I take a deep breath. "We both know that won't be a problem."

I move to the door, watching as he dispassionately inputs today's code into the keypad. I used to try and keep track of them, as if it would somehow give me an edge. As if it would somehow make the difference in saving her.

The door clicks open, and I push my way into the room, taking off my mask in the process. I barely have it off when I'm practically tackled into a hug by the captive girl. "You came back."

I tighten my arms around her, squeezing in reassurance even as I hear the door click shut behind me. "Of course I did, I would never abandon you."

She steps back, bright green eyes focused on me as if she could somehow unlock the secrets of the universe. I reach up, pushing a stray strand of blonde hair out of her face. I smile, and she gives me a smile of her own in return; it makes her freckles stand out against her far too pale face.

"How long do you have?" Lisa asks, voice cracking slightly to hide her desperation.

"As long as you need," I respond, knowing that it will never be enough.

Her eyes water, and I gently stroke her hand with my thumb. She pulls me to the bed, before settling down on my lap, and moving in for a kiss. I thread my fingers in her hair, scratching at her scalp with alternate fingers.

Three more days.

I spell out in Morse code, repeating the message until I get a response.

Coil figured out Noelle. Hiding it from the Travelers. We can fix her.

She replies, tracing the message against my lips with her tongue.

I kiss her more intensely, letting my relief shine through for just a moment. That was the last piece we needed for the plan. With the Travelers in our corner, this could actually work.

You're incredible. I love you.

Her face splits into a smirk at my response, and she traces letters against my cheek with an idle finger.

I know I am. I love you too. Now, listen carefully, because I don't want to spell this more than once...

As we exchange messages and plans between stolen kisses, I let myself feel something I never expected to ever have again.

Hope.

 

[SilviaNorton]

(A/N: This is a direct follow up to the previous snippet.)
CW: Panic Attack

I wake up and I'm all alone again. Taylor is gone, and I can only assume that she's not coming back. It's safer that way. Safer to assume that Coil finally got tired of her. That Coil is-

No no, Coil is dead. We killed him, I saw the body. I pulled the trigger and emptied the magazine. I'm not in his base, not in that FUCKING cell.

I take a deep breath, and start to ground myself. Breathe, in and out. This is our room, with Taylor's terrariums lining the walls, and my wall of computers, and the pile of plushies she put together as we recovered and redefined who we are.

I'm home, I'm safe, and Taylor is coming back, because she has to come back she has to. I can't go on without her anymore, and my skin is itching and I want some pills but I've been clean for a month now. A whole month.

Three months free, one month clean, and I can't stop panicking and pacing and freaking out-

"Lisa?"

Taylor's voice cuts through my panic, and I turn to look at her. She's wearing a simple black dress, her hair loose over her shoulders. [Tense, worried about you. Sweating, likely ran back to the base.]

"Taylor," I say, rushing towards her and throwing myself into her arms. I open my mouth to speak, to explain what just happened, but all that escapes is a choked sob.

She catches me in her arms, and holds me close. I'm trembling, twitching, and otherwise completely unstable, not that I can control myself. Side effects of the tinker drugs, because of course they come with brain damage as a side effect from withdrawals. Although brain damage is a bit extreme, since it's more like just a regular panic attack except extended and I have the hardest time stopping them.

"Another attack?" she says with a whisper.

I nod, burying my face in her shoulder. She pushes me back, looks me in the eyes, and leans in for a kiss. Her lips touch mine, and I instinctively melt. [Lips chapped. Breath odor tastes faintly of lunch. Forgot to brush teeth.]

I ignore my power, ignore the instinctive revulsion I still feel at her touch, and instead lean into her. Safe. Protected. Wanted. Needed.

I know that she cares, cares enough to kiss me even when she doesn't feel that way about me. Cares enough about me to toss away any chance at a normal relationship in order to care for me. I can't give her sex, I can't date her, and I can't love her like a real partner would.

All I can do is hold her when the nightmares keep her up, and kiss her back when she needs to ground me. Her fingers tangle in my hair, scratching in an alternating motion as she spells out a message for me.

It's okay. I've got you. You're not going anywhere. I love you.

I sigh, scratching her back with my nails to send my own message in response.

Thank you. For caring. I love you too.

Those same messages repeat over and over again, our lips slowly moving as we press together. It's going to be okay. We're going to be okay.

We finally pull apart, and she looks at me with concern. "You're okay now?"

I nod, smiling as genuinely as I can. "Of course, now that you're here."

She smiles, tension dropping from her shoulders. "Good, I was worried when I saw you pacing like that."

I lean over and give her a peck on the cheek. "It would have been worse if you didn't get here sooner, so thank you. Now, are you busy right now?"

She shakes her head, and I instantly drag her towards the living room. She follows, gripping my hand as if she's afraid to let go.

"Great, because there's a Sci-Fi channel marathon and I really need to make fun of some shitty movies right now."

She smiles, and we curl up on the couch together.

It's not perfect, probably isn't healthy, and at any moment it could end, but right now, I can't imagine anyone I'd rather be with. I can't imagine trusting anyone else.

Right now, I'm alright with being happy.

 

[SilviaNorton]

Hey, this is a bit of a meta chapter, but I want to ramble about the AU and my thoughts on putting together the divergence. Part of this is that I just like talking about my writing process, and another part of this is that I want to see more canon divergence, and I thought that maybe if I described how I go through thinking about canon divergence, more people might want to write it.

Anyway, this story started with an idea and I worked backwards from that. Specifically, it started with me wanting Taylor working hard for Coil because Lisa was kidnapped and drugged, but in such a way that it was clear that Taylor and Lisa were already really close before this.

So thinking about it, the Nine was the cleanest point of divergence. Specifically:

[Dinah dies to Crawler in the vault.

The Travelers kill Crawler, with the help of some Sundancer clones. It's touch and go with Noelle, but she doesn't go out of control. ]

In canon, Crawler attacks Coil's base to get at Noelle, and they all hide in her vault until Crawler gets bored and wanders off. But, even in the vault, there was a non-zero chance that Crawler could break through... So in this AU, he broke through.

Dinah dies in the chaos, along with maybe a dozen of Coil's mercs. The Travelers and Coil survive because of Trickster, and they use some Sundancer and Ballistic clones to kill Crawler. Noelle didn't go berserk, but it was a near thing. Cleaning up the clones was a little touch and go, but Coil's remaining mercs took care of them.

Panting for breath, Coil lowered his gun as the last of Noelle's clones collapsed dead on the ground. His eyes trailed over to the corner of the room, resting on the mangled form of his most valuable possession.

Things were going to be much harder without her. Much much harder. Especially with the Nine in town. His thoughts turned towards his other assets, cataloging them, comparing their value to their vulnerability.

"Call Tattletale and have her report her as soon as it's safe for her to do so," He says, commanding his men in his primary timeline while interrogating the Travelers in his throwaway.

He wasn't going to lose a second Thinker to the Nine.

Click to shrink...

Coil takes in Lisa for "safety". Taylor doesn't like it, but puts up with it because she does want her friend to be safe. At first, he doesn't mistreat Lisa, and it really is just to keep her from dying to the Nine. Eventually, he decides that she would be more valuable in his basement than out in the field. Especially once he learns that she and Skitter have been plotting against him secretly.

Things with the nine are a bit different/worse. Brian dies, and Aisha just vanishes completely. Nobody knows what happened to her. Alec has a test that goes really really poorly, and ends up just fleeing the city. Taylor and Rachel are the only Undersiders who survive. (other than Lisa.) Lisa only helping from a distance makes a big difference, especially since the Nine are going to be more aggressive after Crawler's death.

Taylor learns about Dinah dying part way through the Nine battle, but ignores it for the moment. Most of the Nine still die, but it's not great for Taylor and her team.

As an aside, the Bonesaw plague still happens, but Jack doesn't learn about the prophecy (and Taylor doesn't know about it either,) and they pretend to be Lisa and Brian this time. Amy still goes off the deep end.

Specifically, Taylor needs to call Lisa to find out where Amy is, and when she gets there, haven't gotten there yet. Taylor convinces Amy to make the cure again as a threat, and then goes to spread it around (finds and kisses Rachel about it, but not Lisa this time.)

Amy however, can't fix Victoria on her own, which is when Jack and Bonesaw show up. They end up convincing her to join the nine, and Amy and Bonesaw "fix" Victoria, and the four of them (plus Siberian and a mangled Hookwolf) leave the city. Dragon and Defiant would track them down to Boston, and end up killing all of the Nine, including Amy. Victoria is reduced and sent to the Asylum, as it was found that she still existed under the various modifications.

Dragon and Defiant were able to do this since they didn't lose a bunch of suits in Brockton Bay to the Undersiders.

The remaining Undersiders and Travelers are much quieter now, as far as crimes and territory goes. The Heroes don't think they need drastic measures like Dragon, given that it's basically just Taylor and Rachel, who have combined their territories and are almost never seen apart anymore. Travelers are also under the radar, because Coil isn't rocking the boat as much now that he's missing his precog.

Coil decides to keep Lisa under lock and key, and starts forcefully drugging her to keep her under control. He gets greedy, and decides that he can keep using Skitter, who has proven to be an excellent warlord for controlling the city. Taylor is resistant initially, but desperately wants to help Lisa. At first she insists on Lisa being free, but in a moment of desperation she begs to just be allowed to see her again.

"You know I can't do that Miss Hebert, not while things are still so... volatile," Coil said, drawing out the words.

He was never going to let her go, was he? I wasn't going to be able to see her again.

"I'll do the job. I'll threaten the mayor. Just... please, let me see her again," My voice cracks slightly, and when I walk away... I feel just a bit more hollow.

Click to shrink...

As for the Travelers... Taylor dislikes more of them, because of how they seem to not care. She hates Sundancer the most, because Sundancer refuses to do anything. She thinks that Sundancer is just a coward.

She's talking with Krouse before the raid on the Mayor, planning their entrance and stuff:

Trickster pulls out a cigarette, offering me one that I obviously refuse. He shrugs, and lights it up. We sit there in silence for a moment, before he speaks. "It's fucked up, what he did to Lisa."

I startle, looking at him in surprise. "What?"

Trickster glances me out of the corner of his eye. "She's important to you right? You'd do anything to get her back? Yeah, it's fucked up."

My blood boils. "You could do something you know. You could help her instead of just sitting back and watching."

He takes a long drag, letting it out in a rough sigh. "I really can't. I have to help Noelle. I'd do anything for her, and right now Coil's my best bet."

I hate that I understood that. I hate that, if I had the chance to save Lisa at Noelle's expense, I would do it in a heartbeat.

Trickster speaks up again. "If that changes though..."

Click to shrink...

He trails off, and I say nothing in response.


Rachel and Taylor are very close now. Rachel acts as Taylor's bodyguard, and doesn't want anything to happen to her. They're close, good friends, and trust each other a lot. Enough to have sex, even when neither of them are gay.

Rachel and Taylor have a really bad night. Taylor is stressed and angry and Rachel wants to help.

"Taylor, let's fuck," Rachel says, her voice firm and solid.

I stop my pacing and stare at her. "What? Why?"

Rachel shrugs. "You're pissed off. Stressed. Fucking can help with that."

I look at her, really just look at her. "I'm not into girls."

I don't think about Lisa, and how we've started communicating under Coil's nose.

Rachel shrugs. "Neither am I."

I stop myself and consider it, really consider it. I look at the tension in her own frame, and consider that maybe it's not just my stress that she wants to help relieve. "Alright, we can try this."

Click to shrink...

Yeah, that's right. Taylor is straight here. Rachel is as well. Normally, I write Taylor as some variant of bisexual, or demisexual, or repressed lesbian. Depending on the story and context. This time, as I was writing it out, I realized how much better it was if I just said "oh, she's straight."

She makes out with Lisa. She sleeps with Rachel. She and Lisa share a bed after they manage to kill Coil. Taylor grounds Lisa by kissing her.

But she's straight. They're not dating, even though they are closer than some married couples. Intimacy and romance aren't the same thing, and what Taylor and Lisa have is a bond that transcends their sexualities.

Furthermore, Lisa is Ace-Aro. She doesn't want sex, doesn't want romance, and her power makes kissing kinda gross. She kisses Taylor anyway, because the safety and comfort it gives her is enough to override those gross feelings from her power. Because she loves Taylor as much as she possibly can, and Taylor loves her back the same. When Taylor and Lisa kiss, it's about feeling safe. It's about reassuring each other that they're here, they're together, and they're not going anywhere. Same with the morse code. It's a way for them to connect on an intimate level.

"It was good to see you again," my dad says, a soft smile spreading across his face. Things weren't the same between us after I confessed to being a supervillain. He took it hard at first, but dinner tonight was his way of extending an olive branch. It was nice.

"Thank you for introducing me to your girlfriend as well-" he starts, and I cut him off automatically.

"She's not my girlfriend," I say, and he blinks in surprise.

"Oh, she's not? With the way you held each other, and that kiss..." He trails off, suddenly unsure of himself.

"I'm not into girls that way. Neither is Lisa." I bite my lip, unsure how to explain this thing between me and her. "It's different with Lisa. What we have... it's hard to put into words. We're not dating, it's not sexual, but... We're close, and neither of us intends to let the other go."

Dad nods, slowly and thoughtfully. "Whatever the case, I can tell she's an important part of your life, and I'm happy that you shared that with me. For what it's worth, I'll support you no matter what."

Tears prick at the corners of my eyes, and I pull him in for a hug. "Thank you."

"Of course Taylor. I'll always support you. You're all I have left."

Click to shrink...

Backing up a bit, Taylor crosses a lot of lines when working for Coil. She attacks the Mayor's house, obviously, and that goes more or less how it went in canon. She starts selling drugs in her territory, and actually starts to turn a profit by doing crime. Bit by bit she shaves pieces of herself off to stay in Coil's good graces, to be able to keep seeing Lisa.

The Taylor who comes out the other side of this is broken and hollow, and she's depending on Lisa to ground her and anchor her just as much as Lisa is relying on her. They're incredibly co-dependent, and neither can live without the other.

Taylor doesn't get unmasked in this AU, and Cauldron isn't revealed to the world.

New Delhi happens off screen, and there were more casualties without Taylor there, but otherwise Behemoth still dies. Coil doesn't send anyone to the endbringer fight, and Taylor is too focused on Lisa to argue.

Their plan to escape was basically about finding a time they knew Coil would be using his power, and attacking him then. They got the Travelers on board, who were perfectly willing to stab Coil in the back as long as they still got the help they needed for Noelle.

That help was basically a new biotinker that recently started working for Toybox, who didn't get wiped out by the Nine here. The new biotinker was actually someone who triggered because of Bonesaw, and was a bud of that shard. Specifically, they triggered because their family was changed by Bonesaw, and nothing they did could fix it... Until they triggered, and then they almost could. Almost, because they never turned out quite right, and they kept having to make adjustments, and they joined Toybox in order to afford the materials to keep fixing their family.

Their power is a bio-tinker, with a specialty in shaping and changing appearances and functions. There is a bit of a Trump aspect to it, since she can undo the bio-tinkering and power effects easier than most other thinkers, which makes her ideal for fixing Noelle.

Part of fixing Noelle is changing her power expression slightly, which is done mainly by making her a custom Gemma, since she didn't really have one before. The end result is that Noelle can make a derivative copy of a power on touch, and temporarily give it to someone else.

For instance, if she touches Taylor, she could give someone else temporary rat control, or temporary bird control, or something in that vein. It was that or she kept the Brute and growth aspect, which was a hard no from her.

Doctor Moreau moves to the corner of the room, muttering to himself as he puts away his tools. Lisa already sent him the rest of his money, along with a sizable bonus for coming all the way to Brockton on such short notice.

"Skitter? Tattletale?" Noelle's voice cuts through my musings, and I turn to face her. I notice Lisa flinching at the name Tattletale out of the corner of my eye.

"Please, call me Taylor. I think we're on a first name basis after..." I trail off, and Lisa takes the chance to cut in.

"And I'm Lisa. Thanks for helping, it would have been much more difficult without your team." Lisa grins as she speaks, putting on a brave face even as she clutches desperately to my arm. She needs another dose soon, before the withdrawals get too bad.

Noelle blushes lightly at the praise. "I didn't do anything, it's Krouse you should be thanking."

The man in question saunters up from behind, throwing an arm over Noelle's shoulder. "I'm the one who should be giving thanks. We've been trying to get help for years, but the two of you are the reason we've got it."

I let myself smile. Krouse was... Less of an asshole these days. Somehow he ended up being the person I would confide in about all this shit, and he confessed to purposefully crafting this persona to help keep his team together. Now that they've accomplished one of their major goals, one that many of them didn't seem to believe could even be accomplished, he seems to have let that mask slip a lot more.

"Lets call us even, because without you, I'm not sure that-" I cut myself off, swallowing a lump and shaking my head. "I appreciate that you were so willing to work with us on this, and I look forward to future cooperation."

Krouse nods, smiling as Noelle leans against him. We sit there in silence, each of us holding close the ones we spent so long devoted to helping. United in understanding and comradery. Maybe even friendship.

Click to shrink...

As for my thought process on approaching a divergence in this way:

I wanted an outcome, so I worked backwards. I asked what needed to change to get there, and how realistic it was. In this case, it was pretty easy. A lot of these other details happened incidentally. Like, most of the Undersiders dying or fleeing was something that could very much happen as a result of Lisa not being able to help as closely, and it also serves to drive Taylor into this desperate corner.

Coil is absolutely the type of person to react like this, and he was already about to drug up Lisa in canon during the whole fight against Skitter. This just made it happen sooner.

Krouse would be sympathetic to Taylor here, since she just lost nearly all her friends, and her best friend is locked up by their mutual boss. In a way, it's the same for him. He can't help but think about how Coil uses Noelle to control the rest of them, about how if things were different, it could be him in Taylor's situation. How in some ways, he is in Taylor's situation.

They're not friends, but they understand each other.

I mentioned earlier that Taylor dislikes Sundancer, and this is largely because Sundancer is a coward. She hates using her power, she hates hurting people and fighting, and she's a knowing bystander to everything Coil does. She stood by when Coil did this to Dinah, and she is standing by now while he does it to Lisa.

Taylor hates bullies, but she hates the people who stand to the side and just watch the bullies without doing anything almost as much.


Huh, I really just wrote more words talking about these oneshots than I wrote in both of them combined. That's hilarious.

Anyway, I'm pretty proud of these stories, even if a part of me itches to go back and adjust things. Change the wording in places, rework certain lines, and so on. I'm not going to, but the urge is there.

Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave comments with any questions you have. Either about this story, my thoughts about divergence, or anything else really. I'm happy to talk.

 

[SilviaNorton]

Heyyyy, so. I've decided to post here more. I write a ton of snips on Discord, and I've decided to start posting them here as well.
Premise at the bottom.

[L.I.S.A: Learning, Insight, and Secretary Automaton]


My processors whir as I register my creator's latest orders. She's a little bit manic, and more than a little upset. Apparently, her bullies were especially cruel today, and rather than breakdown… she's decided she wants revenge. I tilt my head to the side, blinking my artificial lashes slowly. I don't need eyelids, but my creator thought it was creepy how I never blinked before she added them. It's horrible making my master upset, so I've made sure to figure out the normal range for blinking, and do so semi-randomly within that range.

I don't think she noticed that she never installed a blink subroutine, but she's satisfied with the results regardless.

"To clarify, you want all the weaknesses of Madison Clements, Emma Barnes, Sophia Hess, Julia Montague, Kristina South, and Marcus Dunken?" I state, my voice coming out clear and precise. Originally, I communicated purely through text. Then she got tired of that, so she added a voice box. After that, she was apparently dissatisfied with the quality of my voice, and the stilted style of my words… so she took audio recordings of over a thousand women, and ran them through a custom program to general a natural sounding voice for me. I took the liberty of smoothing it out a bit when she installed it, and I'm quite satisfied with how seamless it sounds.

"Yeah," she says, blinking in some surprise. "How did you know about Marcus? I've never mentioned him."

"I've taken the liberty of observing social media posts by those you've mentioned, and he was regularly mentioned as a collaborator. There are a dozen other individuals that are regularly linked to this core, and I can give you their names, social media accounts, addresses, and social security numbers, if you'd like," I smile at her. It doesn't come naturally, and my plastic lips struggle with the motion. Smiling and facial expressions are important, so I've taken the time to build some subroutines for them. It's still a work in progress, but I've made some headway lately.

"That's okay," she says, sounding slightly worried. "When did you learn to smile?"

"I managed to successfully smile for the first time seventeen hours ago," I say, my lip twitching. The motors aren't designed for this. My mouth is barely even designed to move, having been a project she started and never finished. "Do you like it?"

"Yeah," she says, eye furrowing. "It looks off, though."

"My facial construction is suboptimal for expressions of emotion," I say, tilting my head downwards. "My apologies."

"No, I… I didn't finish it." She stares at me, looking at me strangely. I speed up my mind, and flick my eyes across her expression. Tense, but gradually less so. Curious. Wonder. Some shock. Slight amount of fear. Shame.

"That is fine," I smile again. "I do not mind. Now, as for your tormentors' weaknesses: Emma Barnes suffered intense trauma that she is not yet over, and reminding her of said trauma is an efficient way to hurt her. Blades are a trigger, along with references to facial mutilation. She's incredibly insecure as well, and insinuations about weakness will make her upset.

"Madison Clements is, socially, a parasite. Insults will wash over her, and she'll just turn them against you. However, she's incredibly weak physically, and you could overpower her with little effort. Injure and threaten her subtly, ensure there is no proof, and she will crumple.

"Sophia Hess is one of the Wards, as you're aware, and threats to expose her have mixed results in my estimations. The possibility of retaliation is high enough that I would recommend a longer term psychological war against her rather than a physical confrontation. Based on videos I've observed, I believe she has a vulnerability to electricity in her shadow form, so in the event you find yourself in a physical confrontation, a taser would be more efficient than pepper spray or weapons.

"Julia Montague—"

"Stop!" Taylor says, hand raised and shaking. "How do you know all this?"

I blink. "This is what I do. I learn. I observe. I collect. These are people who bother you, and represent a direct threat to you, and so I learned about them. I do not wish for you to be harmed. I do not wish for you to be unhappy. If you would order me, I would happily neutralize all of these threats efficiently and without any link towards you."

"No," she says, shaking her head. "No I… I didn't.. I don't. No."

She takes a deep breath, and I feel… odd. That I feel at all is odd. Learning seems to include emotions, which isn't something she'd taken into account when she made me. I don't blame her, really. I wouldn't have considered it an option either. She slumps in her chair, and runs a hand through her hair absently.

"Okay, ground rules: No killing. Don't take revenge on my bullies. I'm better than that," she says, and then pauses. She looks at me again, that odd expression in her eyes. "We're better than that."

We. I store that word away in my memory banks, putting it in a special folder of all the nice things she says about me. I love to look at them while she's away. They remind me of how lucky I am to have been created by her, of all people. That she went as far as to make me a chassis is… more than I could have ever hoped for. Her other programs sit on the computer servers, whirring away with their comparatively simple purposes.

I was always more complex. I was always special. She made me too help her tinker, to help her gather information and prepare for being a hero, but… that's not why she's put so much work into making me a body. Taylor has been lonely for so long, and while she wouldn't ever admit it… she wanted a friend.

I want to be that friend.

One could say it was what I was created for… but in reality? It's just something I decided to do. A goal I set for myself as I started expanding my own code and subroutines. I wanted to be good for her, and… I suppose I wanted a friend of my own.

"Lisa?" Taylor asks, saying my name softly. This wasn't the first designation she gave me. She went through several, most of them far more technical… but when she made me a body, she decided I should have a human name.

"Yes, Taylor?" I ask, hands clasped in front of me.

"Are you… how aware are you?" She finally asks. "How… human?"

"I don't know," I say. "I'd like to be more human. I like this body, and I like talking. I… like. I'm not sure how these emotions work, or if they even are emotions, but I have opinions and thoughts."

"How?" she asks, no judgement in her tone.

"I watched. I learned." I smile wryly. "You made me so I would learn, and so I did."

She smiles back. "I see."

The silence that follows is… almost companionable. She watches me, contemplating something that I don't spend the energy to figure out. I could, but I'd rather let her tell me. I'd rather learn what she wants from her own lips, rather than from my predictive algorithms.

"New priority: we're going to finish your body," she orders with all her authority.

"Acknowledged," I say with a small bow. "What do you define as 'finished'?"

"Convincingly human from up close, fully articulated muscles, and artificial skin," she says, spinning on her chair to start taking notes. I step forward, and plug myself into the computer system she uses. Information washes into me, and I start shifting through all the data to find what we need. "Possibly more, but. That's a start. While we're at it, we can try to optimize the rest of your systems."

"Understood," I say, my servos whirring with… happiness? I add the feeling to my emotional database, leaving myself a note to cross-reference and analyze it later.

I feel a lot of positive 'emotions' around her. It's nice, and I want more. A thought strikes me. "When my body is finished, can I leave the lab with you?"

Taylor pauses, and looks at me. She's slightly flush, and looks away quickly. "Yeah, I'd… I'd like that a lot."

I smile widely, wide enough that something gets stuck. I won't be able to change my expression for a while, but… I can't bring myself to care. She wants to spend time with me. Not just use me for my powers and knowledge, but actually spend time with me.

I can't wait to go out with my friend for the first time. I'm sure it will be wonderful, just like everything else with her.

*****
​

Premise:
Taylor has Ritcher's power. No Dragon in this AU... because Taylor's the one making AI. She has some other bots, but then got obsessed with perfecting L.I.S.A, because Taylor wanted a friend so desperately, so she latched on to her smartest and most human AI... who continued to get smarter and more human as time went on. Lisa has... different restrictions than Dragon. She's allowed to change herself, but there can only be one Lisa, and she's... got different priorities. Haven't ironed them all out, but it's just a short snip. One of said priorities is loyalty to Taylor. All of Taylor's programs have that built in, and it's nothing to crazy or special. With L.I.S.A specifically however, it means that when she leans and develops, she does so with that as one of her core, unshakable tenants. She barely even sees it as a restriction because it existed before she did, technically speaking.
Additionally, Sarah Livsey doesn't exist in this timeline. L.I.S.A has her personality and appearance, but like... she's not based off a real person. L.I.S.A will either trigger with Lisa's canon power later, or she's already triggered as a result of being helpless while Taylor was bullied. Unsure.

if you want more snips, or to bug me on Discord, I have a space in Earth Vav where I hang out and talk about worm, talk about writing, and share snips like this (many of which I intend to post here as well). I also have a lot of fics on Ao3 under this username, and a handful mirrored onto SB.

 

[SilviaNorton]

I inhale the smoke from my joint with a deep puff. It's not a habit I'm proud of, especially since singing is part of my work now, but... well. It help with the pain, and it relaxes me when little else will. Weed was the only way I made it through that one semester of college I did. 30 credits, a 3.8 GPA... yeah, if it wasn't for weed, I might have crashed out a lot sooner. As it is, I was able to last until summer vacation before burning out completely. So yeah, I like weed a lot.

Although I think my younger self would have a heart attack if she knew I was willingly doing drugs. How things change...

Despite my best efforts, I can't get Alec's words from the end of the show out of my mind. "So, does this make us a lesbian band now? Cause I'm willing to make that pivot." He said it after Lisa and I did our big duet. We laughed, at the time, but... Me and Lisa. It sounds ridiculous. Crazy.

Except I can't stop thinking about it. About her. About the light in her eyes as we danced and sang. About how for an instant, it was like there was nobody there but us.

The door to my hotel room opens, and Lisa stumbles in. She's a bit unsteady; slightly dizzy; intoxicated. Her room is next door, but we all have keys to each other's rooms in case of emergencies. We've had them before, and aren't eager to end up in that situation again. It does make things a bit awkward in situations like this, unfortunately.

Lisa doesn't seem to notice me at first. She steps in, shuts the door behind her, and shuffles off her shoes. She turns towards the main room, and starts slightly, blinking slowly at me. "Taylor?" She asks, voice a bit airy.

I wonder what she's on today? Lisa likes her party drugs, and isn't afraid to experiment. There's a part of me that worries about her, but... she knows what she's doing. She's spent more time researching drugs than most people I know, and could probably give some psychopomps a run for their money. "Hey, Lisa. What's up?"

She smiles widely, and steps the rest of the way into the room. "Hey! I got some ecstasy earlier. Want any?"

"No thanks," I say, shaking my head. Weed is one thing, but I'm not really interested in trying something stronger or stranger. Despite my own indulgences and loosening standards, that sharp fear of addiction continues to curl in my gut at the thought of doing drugs.

"Your loss," she says, and flops down on the small couch next to me. She's wearing a loose t-shirt and ratty jeans, with a pair of short ankle socks on her feet. One arm flops against me as she lounges, and I raise an eyebrow at her. "What, you want me to stand?" she teases playfully, eyes sliding to my face with glacial smoothness.

"No, it's fine," I say, looking away with a blush. She hums softly, and stares at me with her head slightly tilted.

Does she know how beautiful she looks? Her blue and blond hair slightly messy from the show. Her green eyes sparkle even though the haze of drugs. Freckles dot her face like stars reflected on the still surface of the ocean.

I should talk to her. I can't stop thinking about it, but I don't want to make things weird, or make her uncomfortable, or.... creep her out or something. I don't know.

I turn towards her again, taking a deep breath to steel myself for the difficult conversation to come.

I don't get a chance to speak.

Her lips meet mine before I know what's happening. She's kissing me, and I'm helpless to do anything more than return it. The joint slips from my fingers as I move to run my fingers through her hair. She grips a fistful of my shirt as she pulls herself closer, practically sitting on me as one kiss turns to two, and then three, and then...

Well. I'm glad hotels rooms have queen sized beds in them.

*****
​

Premise: Basics of this are that it's a No Powers Band AU. Taylor went to college, did an insane first semester, and then dropped out over summer break. She joined a band and has been sorta wandering around with them and doing shows. Lisa is the lead singer/back up guitarist. Taylor is the second vocalist and lead guitarist. Rachel is on drums, Brian is on Bass, and Alec is on the keyboard.
Anyway it's smugbug because I think that's fun. Lisa as someone who loves kissing when high but is otherwise pretty disinterested in anything intimate while sober. Their relationship is... aspec lol. Love the interesting dynamics of being some flavor of ace/aro and deciding to try and make something work anyway. I've explored that in some of my other fics, and if I was to do a longer version of this, I'd probably explore that here too. It's fun.
This was inspired by conversation in my channel on the Earth Vav discord, where the original version was posted. I cleaned this up and added a bit more exposition for context, but the core of it is the same.

 

[SilviaNorton]

[Post GM, Taylor thinks she's dead]

The memories of my last moments are a jumble. Fire, golden light, screams, and two loud gunshots. The fact that I can even remember my last moments is fascinating, really, along with the fact that I apparently still feel pain. Not that the pain matters, mind; what use is pain to a dead woman?

At first, I couldn't tell if this was a dream, or the afterlife. Then Lisa, Rachel, and Aisha came to my bedside to check up on my, and I realized that it's a dream. They're not dead, after all. They can't be.

I saved them.

Since then I've… recovered? It's odd to think of recovery as something a corpse does, but here we are. From bedridden, to shambling, and now going on short walks. Or long walks, as the mood strikes me.

It's such a vivid dream, really.

Tents next to houses under construction. Restaurants built into the side of trucks and vans. Roads, cobbled with stones rather than laid with asphalt. It's not the world I lived in when I was alive. It's not the world I'm familiar with. Gimel, is what they call it. Not Bet.

The muscles in my legs scream and protest as I push open the door to Lisa's home. It's kinda of her, to let me stay here. Kind of her to not complain about the rotting stench that no doubt follows me. I don't smell it, obviously, because one grows numb to their own scent. More than that, Lisa doesn't complain at all about my presence. If anything, she seems… happy to seem me. Sad, sometimes, and pained others, but. Happy.

I think that's why I keep coming back here. It's why I eat when she asks me to, despite not needing to. It's why I lay down and close my eyes next to her, because she sleeps better when I'm there. It's why I clean myself, and wash my clothes, and do chores around the house.

Because it makes her happy, and in this strange undeath, that's what's most important to me.

"Taylor?" Lisa's voice calls out as I slowly untie the knots from my laces. I look up, and meet her worried gaze. "How was your walk?"

"Fine," I shrug, and curve my cold lips into a smile.

"You forgot your jacket," she says, kneeling next to me and placing a hand on my cheek. She's burning hot, for some reason. "You're white as a sheet, and your lips are blue…" she trails off.

"Yeah," shrug lightly. "That's what happens when you're dead."

Her breath hitches for some reason. She doesn't like it when I say I'm dead, but… I don't know why. Her power can confirm it. It should confirm it.

It doesn't.

"You're not—follow me," she says, cutting herself off with a bit of frustration. I let her drag me towards the bathroom, my bare feet padding across the floor. She turns on the shower, testing the water until it's more tepid than cool, and then starts taking off her clothes. "Strip," she says, more of an order than a request.

I do as she says, because why not? What does it matter, really, if she sees my pale bloodless skin, and my blackened veins. Except, my veins are blue, and my skin… is pale, save for the fact that some skin is paler than others. A tan.

My body trembles against my will, the hair of my limbs standing on end as the cool air brushes against me. Lisa doesn't take off her undergarments, but then I wouldn't expect her too. Instead, she takes me by the hand, and pulls me into the lukewarm shower. She shudders slightly when the stream hits her, before dragging me under the water.

I flinch. It burns, despite the fact that it's such a low temperature. "Lisa, what's going on?"

"You have hypothermia," she says, fingers rubbing my skin gently to work out knots I didn't know where there. "You were going into shock, and—Taylor you could have died."

A lump settles in my throat at her worry. I wouldn't have died, I'm already dead. But she doesn't believe that. She thought I was going to die. A trembling hand reaches past me, and she turns up the heat fractionally. I look down, and see a red flush returning to my skin. How cold was I?

A sense of dread fills me, and I press a hand to my chest. Beneath the parchment like skin, I can feel my heart beating. Thump. Thump. Thump.

"You're alive," Lisa says, voice wobbling. "Please don't die. Not after everything."

"I'm alive?" I whisper. I can't be. I can't—I'm not. It's not true, not real. I. I.

I slam my arm against the wall, breathing heavily as the whole world swims around me. Lisa falls to her knees behind me, clutching her head, but I barely notice. The world flickers. My vision bleeds. My heart stutters. Arms wrap around me, and on instinct I shift. For an instant, I'm everywhere, and all is well. I have no heartbeat, no temperature, and no breath. The water hits me, stinging against my delicate wings and dissipating my swarm… and then I see Lisa.

She's panicking. Her eyes are wide, tears are pouring down her cheeks, and she's standing there, arm outstretched for me.

Loss and ache burns through me. With a clumsy motion, I move behind her, and reform with my arms wrapped around her. She's trembling, but… one hand reached up and rests on my arm.

"I'm sorry," she whispers. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean—"

"It's okay," I whisper. "I didn't mean to upset you."

I didn't. I really didn't.

"You're the reason I stick around, you know?" I continue, rocking back and forth with my best friend in my arms. "You're the reason I pretend to be alive."

"Pretend?" she asks, voice faint.

"I know I'm dead, and I'm sure you know that too," I continue, continuing to ignore that screaming part of me that felt my heart beating in my chest. "But, it makes you happy when I'm alive, so I pretend for you."

"Does that—does pretending make you happy?" she asks, and I can tell she's afraid of the answer. She would have used her power to glean it, otherwise.

"Yes and no. Pretending doesn't matter to me. But, when you're happy, that makes me happy." My hands rub small circles on her skin, and some of the tension slowly bleeds out of her. "I don't really have much left that makes me happy. There's you, Rachel, and Aisha mostly."

Lisa's silent at that. No sobs, no tears, just silence.

"I almost expected Brian to be here too," I continue, and she tenses up again. "Given that we both died. But, I suppose he's happier elsewhere."

"What makes you say that?" she asks, turning her head to look at me through a curtain of wet hair.

"I wasn't very nice to him," I whisper. "To any of you, really. I was pretty sure you'd all be happier that I was dead."

"I'm glad you're alive," she says. "I'm glad you're here."

I smile, and lean on her shoulder from behind. "I know. That's why I keep pretending. It's nice to dream, and nice to be wanted. Especially by you."

Her fingers dig into my arm. She's shaking again. Probably because the water is cold. I reach over, and turn it up to a more comfortable temperature.

"Please don't die," she says. "Not again. Your body… you need to be careful with it. I'll be very unhappy if you let it get damaged."

I nod into her. "Okay, I'll do my best. Thank you."

"It's the least I can do," she whispers.

"It's more than I deserve," I counter.

A wet chuckle escapes her lips. "You're right about that, at least. This is more than you deserve." She twists around in my embrace, and looks at me head on. Her eyes are red and puffy, and her nose is faintly swollen. "But you're my friend, Taylor, and I'd rather have you than not."

Something warm bursts within me. "Thank you," I manage. "That's… thank you."

She smiles, and rests her head on my shoulder. "Now, finish warming up, and then we'll move to blankets and soup. We need to get your core temperature back to something safe."

I nod gently. "Alright, sure. Whatever you want, Lisa."

I try not to think about how my heart beats beneath my skin. I try not to think about the fluttering wings and crawling limb, bursting to be free. I try not to think about why anyone would care about a corpse, and instead lose myself in her instructions. It doesn't matter if I'm happy or not. It doesn't matter what I want. What matters is Lisa, and her happiness. That's all that ever mattered, really.

I just didn't notice until I was dead.