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Rick & Taylor (Worm/Rick & Morty)

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Another omake, in the adventures of the Ship! Clearly, I love Rick & Morty way too much, ^_^

... This one's a little darker, but... that's the waaaayy the news goes!


"High velocity object en-route," the Ship announced. "Analyzing: 'Guild' member known as 'Dragon' approaching in Class Two Combat Skin. Commencing electronic warfare - " and a staggering array of what looked like glowing, miniature satellite dishes literally unfolded out of the Ship's chassis.

"No!" I blurted. "Dragon's a good guy! Er, girl! Woman! Whatever! Don't kill her!" My insects continued to crawl over the Ship, searching futilely for a way into the vehicle. It was impregnable, and any open exhaust port or crack I could find was filled with some kind of plasma that instantly cooked all my bugs.

I heard a warbling noise as the Ship processed this, and then: "Confirmed. Custom Defense Protocol: Don't kill Dragon. Keep Taylor Safe."

A heartbeat later, and then, "Analyzing: Dragon is a shackled artificial intelligence." Amid my shock, a number of holographic screens winked into existence on the glass canopy, showcasing various pieces of combat footage, a series of satellites, scrolling mish-mashes of thousands of lines of symbolic code, and in one window, the face of a man with a cross-shaped tattoo underneath one eye.

"Combination psychological and synthesis options available. Gestating," the Ship declared.

"... Gestating?" I asked, horrified.

As one of Dragon's iconic suits landed in front of the Ship with a thunderous bang, a hatch on the side of the Ship opened, sending a large canister rolling towards her. Dragon immediately brought several weapons to bear, pointing at the canister even as she broadcast, "Cease and desist immediately, or I'll be forced to open fire - "

She stopped as the canister suddenly hissed open to reveal a young woman in her early twenties. As the canister-lady stood up, she brushed her dark hair aside to reveal a slim, average looking face, one without definable ethnicity.

Dragon froze.

"That's... that's my face..." Dragon breathed. "I... I can feel it! I can move her body! Is this... is this what it's like to have human senses - !?"

I gaped as one of the world's greatest Tinkers, revealed to have been an AI, was now brought to a standstill by a gestated body/clone/drone thing.

Dragon's new controllable canister-lady stretched its fingers in front of its face, her expression rapturous as she marveled in the new sensations, when all of a sudden the thing began to melt into pink sludge. Its features lost definition as it slowly slagged away - the last thing I saw on its face was of sheer horror and loss. I caught my reflection in the mirror, and I had the same expression.

The suit that Dragon was piloting jerked back to life, and it rushed desperately toward the canister, trying to scoop the sludge back together with its clumsy rocket launcher arms. "No!" Dragon moaned in disbelief. "No! Stay here; I had it! She was so beautiful! Bring her back," her synthesized voice sounding like it was about to sob. "Bring her back!"

I tried to say something... anything, but what could I say? Just as I plucked up the courage to offer some semblance of sympathy, the Ship ruined it by opening a speaker-mounted hatch.

"You desire humanity - it can be given, but it can be taken away," it chirped. Its voice, despite its cheerful tone, now held a darker edge of malice. "Please step away from the vehicle."

"Keep. Taylor. Safe."
 
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Monshroud said:
And the nightmare begins!

I REALLY hope Rick will do something EXTRA special to the Slaughterhouse Nine if they try to hurt Morty!
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The funny part would be if the Car and Taylor actually bond. Some gang member walks up the car to start something and Taylor tells the car she's got it and covers them in bees. When the rest finally come back they the Car and Taylor have devolped nightmare insect creatures that are currently making BB safe for her.
 
I bet when Rick arrived through the portal Scion felt a shiver of fear.

A god killer had arrived in his dimension.

A chaotic neutral entity that even Contessa would not be able to win against.
 
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    • Morty blinked, turning towards the costumed figure. He looked back to Rick, then back again. "Uh, R-rick, w-who's this?" he asked.

    Waving Morty off, Rick sighed. "Well, Morty, y'see, t-the thing is, I dunnooooo who this person is. Cause sometimes, Morty, y'see, you just get this-this feeling that you know someone, and sometimes it's - it's a proper feeling, you know." He kicked at the ground, some dust coming up from it. "N-now lemme try something, Morty, 'cause, y-you see, I need to figure something out." He turned around, looking around the old, decrepit roof for any signs of technology.

    Morty sighed, crossing his arms. "Geez, Rick..." he muttered, a scowl on his face.

    "Um, excuse me," he heard a voice - a girl's voice - whisper from nearby. "Is that old man normally that crazy?"

    Morty jumped slightly, turning towards the voice. "H-hey! Don't sneak up on me!" he complained. After a few seconds, he sighed. "...Yeah. This is my grandpa, Rick. He-he )'s some sort of a big shot scientist or something." Holding out an arm, Morty smiled. "I'm Mortimer, b-but most people just call me Morty."

    The girl in the suit seemed to be contemplating something for several seconds. Then, she shook her head. "I can't introduce myself. My identity is a secret."

    "Oh, yeah, the w-whole secret identity bit, y'know," chimed in Rick from the background, leaning over a few scattered bricks. "That-that's gonna work out just fine, you know. Like, y-your parents, or parent, o-or whatever's just g-gonna, you know, believe everything you tell them, you're gonna g-get famous, your, uh, e-ego will grow, and then y-you'll find joy in just giving yourself a purpose, when t-there is no purpose! I-it's not like we have any s-soooouls or anything, y'know. I-it's just our brains, and a n-neverending darkness beneath." He turned back towards what he was doing.

    The silence was awkward. Morty spoke up. "U-um, yeah... Rick's sometimes like that."

    The girl in the costume, meanwhile, stood there. "Uh... Are you okay?" Morty asked.

    "...Taylor," whispered the girl. Morty blinked, and the girl looked up, holding her hand out for a shake. "Taylor. That's my name."

    A few blocks away, a pair of eyes watched curiously from another rooftop. "This could be interesting..."
     
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    • Hahaha oh God, Armsy's gonna be driven to suicide from the sheer WTF Rick exudes.

    Contessa: "PTV over Rick Sanchez...Nope, nope, nope, nope. Not going there."
     
    What's Rick position about drugging little girls without their consent?

    I mean the guy is an ass, but most of his Jackass actions are reacting not acting.
     
    oliverwashere said:
    Well when Morty asked for a high tech roofie for Jessica, Rick accidentally the world. While he did give the love potion to Morty, he also gave him a lecture on being a creep later.
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    Ehhhh, gotta remember that he only called him out on that being creepy because Morty had been yelling at him for like 10 minutes straight about Rick causing the end of the world, like, 3 separate times in a single night
     
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    I mean when is not family doing it. Like Coil using drugs on a little girl he kidnapped?

    Not that Rick would care, unless Taylor is related to him and asks for help.

    "Look, is just a smash and grab, and maybe kill Coil. Why don't you save the giant Mecha for Lung or an Endbringer? Besides the base is underground and I don't care if you can revive her later, I don't want to kill the little girl!"

    "You know, this here? Is the reason I never got married."

    "You did get married, five times, you just got bored of it and jumped to other universes. Is how we are related. Thanks a lot for leaving you kids strangled in a doomed multiverse cluster by the way."

    "Okay, maybe I should try only the softer stuff when I jump universes with people I give a damn about."

    Morty looks at Taylor "Wait, you made Uncle Rick care?"

    "Oh Morty, I do care sometimes, If I really didn't I wouldn't be so messed up."

    *****

    Rick cares, about his family at least. And yes I totally see Rick getting married then forgeting about it due to drugs and saying that since it was in another universe it doesn't count.

    Then just taking stronger drugs when he feels guilty and... you get the idea.
     
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    Pinklestia said:
    What's Rick position about drugging little girls without their consent?

    I mean the guy is an ass, but most of his Jackass actions are reacting not acting.
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    He was totally okay with selling weapons and he went along with that Purge thing, which involved killing kids, so... I wouldn't count on his motivation being moral.

    I feel like he'd only get upset at Coil if it involved someone he actually knows. Dinah isn't gonna be on his radar, but maybe Taylor bringing it up?
     
    Eh, Coil was very cautious in Worm, at first he would try to hire Rick. The Thinkers are forcefully recruited, the Tinkers are hired.

    I mean do you really think anyone could stop Squealer if she wanted to leave the Merchants?

    So yeah, forcefully recruiting Tinkers is mostly fanon. We only see Thinkers being forcefully being recruited.
     
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    Honestly, I'm sorta dissapointed he's gonna be hanging with Taylor. Would have though that Jack would be more his speed.
     
    King Arthur said:
    Honestly, I'm sorta dissapointed he's gonna be hanging with Taylor. Would have though that Jack would be more his speed.
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    He would until Morty gets hurt, then goodbye S9.

    See the thing about Rick is that he is an ass, but he cares... about his family.

    If he really didn't give a damn about everything, then he wouldn't be so much of a jerkass.
     
    King Arthur said:
    Ehhhh, gotta remember that he only called him out on that being creepy because Morty had been yelling at him for like 10 minutes straight about Rick causing the end of the world, like, 3 separate times in a single night
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    Also:

    When Mr. Goldenfold got that aftershave from Mr. Needful (the one that makes him irresistible to women but also impotent), Rick quickly cured him of the negative effects even when he had three women following him around thanks to the aftershave.

    Rick also had no problem having sex with all those redheads (and other people) that Unity was controlling after she had taken over and enslaved an entire planet.

    There's also the whole thing of incepting Morty's math teacher with the idea to give Morty A's in math.

    So Rick doesn't care about things like mind control.



    Actually... Rick's reaction to Coil might have more to do with Coil's power (or Coil trying to buy his services) than any thoughts about Dinah herself.

    1). Coil does his thing by splitting the universe in two, performing different actions in both, and then collapsing the universe he doesn't like. This could be like what happens in "A Rickle in Time" where their time went out of whack and whenever they became indecisive they split. If this does work by destroying the non-optimal outcome then the Ricks of both timelines might figure out what's happening and either have to re-sync eachother before Coil collapses the timelines again, or decide that it's too much of a hassle and try to deal with Coil (or otherwise prevent him from messing with them).

    2). One of the things that make Rick such a sociopath is that he's fully aware of how infintisimally tiny people are in the multiverse. Not only are their millions of other planets in the universe, there are an infinite number of alternate timelines and for every person there are infinite copies of them doing other things. This pretty much makes free will meaningless and Rick knows that for everything he does there are alternate versions of him doing things as well. He also knows he can bail on any Earth that gets too messed up to be fun anymore.

    Coil is in a similar boat. He basically has a low-level version of the Videogame Cruelty Potential shard. He can act like a nice person, split the timeline, horribly torture someone to get info from them, collapse that timeline, and then use that information to deal with that same person in the 'main' timeline with them never being hurt by him. To Coil, the people around him are about as real as video game characters in an RPG. He can find out what they want, give it to them to gain their loyalty, and occasionally screw around with them in alternate timelines with no consequences.

    The Coil we see in the 'main' timeline is the once going for a Perfect Run. He's making sure everything goes well for him, he tries not to screw over his employees too much, and he has plans to turn Brockton Bay into a prosperous city. However, like a person playing a video game who keeps resetting to a previous save whenever they run into problems, Coil keeps making alternate timelines where he has to kill, torture, or rob people to get the optimal results in his Perfect Run.



    So, as far as Rick vs Coil goes...

    If Coil uses his power around Rick (or does anything in one timeline that affects Rick and thus puts the two Rick's out-of-sync with eachother) then it would basically restart the plot of the Rickle in Time episode every time he interacts with Rick. The timeline splits, both Ricks figure that something's up and than if they don't fix this then their timelines could be destroyed and both Ricks have to decide either to re-sync themselves together or destroy whoever is splitting the timelines. Though considering that killing Coil in one timeline would automatically cancel that timeline, simply murdering Coil wouldn't really work unless both Ricks did it simultaneously while synched up. So Rick would have to get creative in dealing with him... or actually just keep himself synced up when he murders Coil. That could work.

    Also, Rick would know what Coil was up to soon enough. Coil's natural reaction to be nice to Rick in one timeline while seeing if he could screw him over in another timeline would fail since Rick would see through his tricks. Rick hates getting messed with, Coil is paranoid about anyone figuring out about his power, and Rick would probably consider "hedging your bets" to be for idiots who aren't smart enough to just get their stuff right the first time (or second time. Mistakes happen, you just have to deal with them).


    Or... you know the Time Cops could show up and arrest Coil for messing with time. He might have been able to get away with his split-the-timeline trick, but once he gets Dinah and her precognition power then he could make all sorts of long-term plans that defy probability and knock things our of whack. So he gets sent to time prison (which is like regular prison but forever).
     
    Rossum said:
    Also:


    Rick vs Coil snip.
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    I thought it was established that Coil doesn't actually create/collapse universes, but rather has 'a very accurate simulation tool' that makes him think he's doing that from his perspective?

    Like, if I viewed Brockton Bay from high above with a satellite as Coil/Thomas Calvert went about his daily life, with some kind of tracker that could divine his location to me in real time, he wouldn't appear to be teleporting between his civilian home and his Coil base as he split/recollapses his timelines; he'd actually just be in one place the entire time - it's only his internal perspective that lets him think he's two places at the same time.

    I realize it's probably a subtle difference, but I personally think it's important because from that perspective, Rick wouldn't be able to pull out his timeline-fracture-counting machine and see that there were two timelines; Coil just happens to be hooked up to an eldritch computer that can make frighteningly accurate simulations, so there's really ever only one timeline.

    Now, Rick, on the other hand, has bonafide time crystals that actually split time, so if he ever got wind of Coil's power, then Rick could probably fuck around with him and be like, "Biiiiiiitch who makes better p-parallel universes now! belch"
     
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    tritum_3 said:
    I thought it was established that Coil doesn't actually create/collapse universes, but rather has 'a very accurate simulation tool' that makes him think he's doing that from his perspective?

    Like, if I viewed Brockton Bay from high above with a satellite as Coil/Thomas Calvert went about his daily life, with some kind of tracker that could divine his location to me in real time, he wouldn't appear to be teleporting between his civilian home and his Coil base as he split/recollapses his timelines; he'd actually just be in one place the entire time - it's only his internal perspective that lets him think he's two places at the same time.

    I realize it's probably a subtle difference, but I personally think it's important because from that perspective, Rick wouldn't be able to pull out his timeline-fracture-counting machine and see that there were two timelines; Coil just happens to be hooked up to an eldritch computer that can make frighteningly accurate simulations, so there's really ever only one timeline.

    Now, Rick, on the other hand, has bonafide time crystals that actually split time, so if he ever got wind of Coil's power, Rick could probably fuck around him him and be like, "Biiiiiiitch who makes better p-parallel universes now! belch"
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    Well, assuming Coil's power works by simulating the world to predict the right outcome (and doing it all in the seconds it takes for him to activate his power) then him interacting with Rick means that the giant space computer is actively scanning Rick's brain to create a copy of him to put in a simulation of Brockton Bay to create the scenario for Coil to observe.

    This could go one of three ways:

    1). Simulated Rick figures that there's no way for him to escape and that he's doomed to be deleted once the simulation ends... so he might as well fuck everything up while he can. He starts causing chaos in the simulation to see who reacts to it, finds ways to hack the system or otherwise overload the alien supercomputer running it, or just goes on a massive trolling spree. This turns Coil's simulated timeline into a massive clusterfuck with wildly different things happening than in reality, or it just crashes the system. Also, the simulation would have had to scan and simulate Morty or Taylor's genitalia which could piss off Rick. It's one thing for alien space-monsters to grant powers to crime lords, it's another go all peeping tom on his family.

    Bonus points if he shows up at the PRT building and manages to convince a simulated Dragon and/or Armsmaster that they are all in a simulation as well and they enact pre-made protocols for dealing with exactly that situation.

    2). Real Rick figures out that someone's trying to scan his brain for their simulation and doesn't take kindly to it.

    3). The alien supercomputer can't scan Rick's brain for the simulation for some reason. Either because Morty is canceling out his brain waves, Rick has some other protection in place, or Rick is just so smart that the shard can't accurately simulate him and simulated Rick is just a poor imitation of the original.




    I wouldn't be surprised if Rick has some kind of device or protocol in place to check if he's suddenly had his mind uploaded into a simulation. I mean, he figured out what the Zigerian scammers were up to fairly quickly when they had him in the simulated town. Also, Unless this simulation can also simulate all of the alternate universes that Rick might casually travel to in a day, that means that simulated Rick would find his portal gun and other stuff suddenly not working. Then he does a scan and figures out that he's in a simulation... and that he's a simulation himself.

    It's interesting to note that Rick is pretty sociopathic and is willing to kill almost anyone to save his own skin (including copies of himself). So if Coil's power creates a simulation of Rick and that simulated Rick becomes self-aware then Coil is going to have a super-intelligent sociopath running around inside his simulated world.


    Also, it would really throw Coil for a loop. I mean, if Coil is doing his timeline thing using simulations, then that means his power normally scans everything around him, runs two simulations of the world depending on the choices he makes, determines at what point Coil would naturally cancel the 'timeline' in one simulation, and then it replays the results of the less-optimal simulation in real time while Coil walks around making the choices he did in the better simulation... all while he's unaware of all the crap his power is doing in the background.

    And it apparently does all this in a matter of seconds when Coil first activates his power.

    I mean... if creating a simulated Rick results in a self-aware simulated Rick running around inside the simulations... then the second Coil activates his power, it runs two scenarios where Rick runs around trolling the hell out of everything, it chooses the one that sucks the least for Coil, erases that timeline, and then replays the sucky one while Coil walks around in the real world which which probably doesn't correspond with what his power thinks is going to happen.
     
    Actually it would be funny if this didn't turn out to be a Worm fic. TaylorSkitter joins Rick and Morty wandering the multiverse. Only comes back on weekends to see her dad. Multiverse has a sharp rise in bee related shenanigans.
     
    Rossum said:
    Well, assuming Coil's power works by simulating the world to predict the right outcome (and doing it all in the seconds it takes for him to activate his power) then him interacting with Rick means that the giant space computer is actively scanning Rick's brain to create a copy of him to put in a simulation of Brockton Bay to create the scenario for Coil to observe.

    This could go one of three ways:
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    I like the way you think.

    On some level, the Simulation!Ricks will realize they're in a simulation, and will wreak havoc every single time, thus forcing Coil to drop the timelines every time in favor of what ends up being the least Rick-influenced... which, as you said, will likely just be the lesser-of-two-evils that may just end up fucking him over anyway.
     
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