Well I've read a few things and like Jake with "Doing it right this time" @Strypgia has inspired...
"On Angel's Wings" (Eva/MacrossF Xover)
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Well I've read a few things and like Jake with "Doing it right this time" @Strypgia has inspired me with A&T and ACoS to throw my own hat into the ring with a bit of Eva fiction. This is a crossover with a MacrossF and while Alto and his friends will appear and have roles I will likely focus more on the AU Eva elements. That stated this will likely be posted up for fun as a first fic and I don't have a beta so I will admit to start that it will probably wind up awkward and (if I continue writing after this story) will probably be a bit embarrassing in the future.
So have fun, laugh with (or at) me, and enjoy the ride.
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Prologue
Island 1 had been in full buzz for weeks over the big show. The galactic fairy was going to be performing two concerts and making various special appearances throughout frontier until their flight path neared close enough to Galaxy for Sheryl to return home. It was the chance of a lifetime for some and as he waited backstage with emergency response gear and replacement smoke containers for the stunt pilots he was just bored. The fact that his friends were more involved in their argument than doing their jobs didn't really help.
"I tell you Toji we can fly at least as good as they can so why are we stuck back here watching tanks and suits when we should be up there with them." Kensuke Aida argued barely concealing the whimper from his tone.
"Just because you think you're god's gift to pilots doesn't mean you are. Not to mention that somebody has to watch the supplies and tanks to keep things going smoothly, wouldn't want an accident ruining your idol's big show now would you?" Toji Suzuhara replied.
As if provoked by that question a pair of pilots collided sending one spiraling toward the stage. As Shinji prepped his pack to fly out the pilot recovered enough to not crash but sent Sheryl off her platform and into his arms. As the pilots improvised formation around this sudden development he heard Aida wail plaintively behind him. "Really, look, Alto gets to hold Sheryl and actually fly her around, can you imagine if that were me out there?"
"Not very likely, you'd have passed out hyperventilating and gotten both of you hurt or killed instead." Toji murmured under his breath as he started pulling replacement smoke tanks only to stumble as he was struck by the spine of an organizer. "OW pres! You have to hit us so hard with weapon you call a schedule?"
"Maybe if you'd take your duties more seriously I wouldn't have to Suzuhara," Hikari replied. "You should both know that we got this job for our good reputation and you guys acting up back isn't helping prove that. You want to keep flying these or go back to working with the old simulators you had before?"
Shinji turned his attention back to the floor as Hikari continued to scold the pair on professional behavior. He noted that the song was ending and Sheryl was being returned to the stage when the general quarters alarm went off. Emergency lights came on to guide the crowd to shelters as disappointed murmurs gradually gave way to panic. Shinji was stunned more out of surprise than any kind of worry or fear; a feeling that was compounded even more when Toji and Kensuke looked at an alert on their phones before turning in unison for the exit.
"Hey Ikari, get yourself and the pres to a shelter ASAP alright? I'm trusting you to get her there safe!" Toji called out as the pair left through the door, followed shortly by Luca and Mikhail who seemed to have a similar alert up. As Shinji and Hikari looked at one another confused as to what was going on they were brushed past rather roughly by a NUNS escort team leading Sheryl out while Alto Saotome followed demanding an explanation. As they watched their classmate get rebuffed by a woman in a formal military uniform Hikari finally spoke up.
"We should get moving Shinji. The shelters around here were designed for crowds but we'll probably have to make it a few blocks before we find anything open. I would say this is a poorly timed drill but that escort made me nervous." The young woman started pulling on the sleeve of Shinji's flight suit as she spoke, drawing an understanding nod from the pilot.
"All right pres, let's get going, I really don't want Suzuhara getting mad at me again like what happened with his sister." The flat look he received for his comment quickly cowed him as he quickly motioned his apology. Upon leaving the backstage door he noticed the crowd had all but vanished and with a quick glance at the emergency notifications on his phone realized they had come out on the wrong side of the hall and would need to walk most of the way around the building. Leaning down he spoke as he lifted her in his arms, "Hold on Hikari, we've got a way to go and the power assist on the suit can get us there faster than walking."
The empty streets and emergency lighting made for a disturbing contrast to their arrival at the hall hours ago and put both teens on edge. As Shinji was about to make a comment to try to dissolve some of the tension they were disturbed by a nearby crash which shook the street enough to knock the pair off-balance and the sounding of secondary warning sirens. As they regained their footing and finally approached the shelter entrance Shinji was grateful for the headgear that muted loud noises as Hikari screamed in his ear and a line of impacts came perilously close to the pair.
Looking back as he pushed Hikari the last few yards Shinji was able to recognize a YF-25 engaging several flying creatures who appeared to be firing some kind of energy pules while the Valkyrie maneuvered in gehrwalk mode to try to get what shots he could. As Hikari began climbing down the ladder Shinji continued to watch and with dread as a Quadluun-Rau came into view crashing to the ground from behind a nearby building as a larger monster followed looking for the kill. Shinji wasn't the only one distracted by this development and it spelled a disastrous result for the Valkyrie pilot who attempted to cover the other pilot as one of their original foes whipped out its tail and piercing the cockpit. The Valkyrie fell into an uncontrolled decent, crashing dangerously close to Shinji as he dove out of the way and triggering the shelter's emergency shutters.
"This is just great, stuck in a battle between monsters and the military and no way to get to safely. Just what were these idiots…" The grumbled complaints died in Shinji's throat as he looked at the powered armor and noticed a face he never expected to see.
"Rei?!"
So have fun, laugh with (or at) me, and enjoy the ride.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Prologue
Island 1 had been in full buzz for weeks over the big show. The galactic fairy was going to be performing two concerts and making various special appearances throughout frontier until their flight path neared close enough to Galaxy for Sheryl to return home. It was the chance of a lifetime for some and as he waited backstage with emergency response gear and replacement smoke containers for the stunt pilots he was just bored. The fact that his friends were more involved in their argument than doing their jobs didn't really help.
"I tell you Toji we can fly at least as good as they can so why are we stuck back here watching tanks and suits when we should be up there with them." Kensuke Aida argued barely concealing the whimper from his tone.
"Just because you think you're god's gift to pilots doesn't mean you are. Not to mention that somebody has to watch the supplies and tanks to keep things going smoothly, wouldn't want an accident ruining your idol's big show now would you?" Toji Suzuhara replied.
As if provoked by that question a pair of pilots collided sending one spiraling toward the stage. As Shinji prepped his pack to fly out the pilot recovered enough to not crash but sent Sheryl off her platform and into his arms. As the pilots improvised formation around this sudden development he heard Aida wail plaintively behind him. "Really, look, Alto gets to hold Sheryl and actually fly her around, can you imagine if that were me out there?"
"Not very likely, you'd have passed out hyperventilating and gotten both of you hurt or killed instead." Toji murmured under his breath as he started pulling replacement smoke tanks only to stumble as he was struck by the spine of an organizer. "OW pres! You have to hit us so hard with weapon you call a schedule?"
"Maybe if you'd take your duties more seriously I wouldn't have to Suzuhara," Hikari replied. "You should both know that we got this job for our good reputation and you guys acting up back isn't helping prove that. You want to keep flying these or go back to working with the old simulators you had before?"
Shinji turned his attention back to the floor as Hikari continued to scold the pair on professional behavior. He noted that the song was ending and Sheryl was being returned to the stage when the general quarters alarm went off. Emergency lights came on to guide the crowd to shelters as disappointed murmurs gradually gave way to panic. Shinji was stunned more out of surprise than any kind of worry or fear; a feeling that was compounded even more when Toji and Kensuke looked at an alert on their phones before turning in unison for the exit.
"Hey Ikari, get yourself and the pres to a shelter ASAP alright? I'm trusting you to get her there safe!" Toji called out as the pair left through the door, followed shortly by Luca and Mikhail who seemed to have a similar alert up. As Shinji and Hikari looked at one another confused as to what was going on they were brushed past rather roughly by a NUNS escort team leading Sheryl out while Alto Saotome followed demanding an explanation. As they watched their classmate get rebuffed by a woman in a formal military uniform Hikari finally spoke up.
"We should get moving Shinji. The shelters around here were designed for crowds but we'll probably have to make it a few blocks before we find anything open. I would say this is a poorly timed drill but that escort made me nervous." The young woman started pulling on the sleeve of Shinji's flight suit as she spoke, drawing an understanding nod from the pilot.
"All right pres, let's get going, I really don't want Suzuhara getting mad at me again like what happened with his sister." The flat look he received for his comment quickly cowed him as he quickly motioned his apology. Upon leaving the backstage door he noticed the crowd had all but vanished and with a quick glance at the emergency notifications on his phone realized they had come out on the wrong side of the hall and would need to walk most of the way around the building. Leaning down he spoke as he lifted her in his arms, "Hold on Hikari, we've got a way to go and the power assist on the suit can get us there faster than walking."
The empty streets and emergency lighting made for a disturbing contrast to their arrival at the hall hours ago and put both teens on edge. As Shinji was about to make a comment to try to dissolve some of the tension they were disturbed by a nearby crash which shook the street enough to knock the pair off-balance and the sounding of secondary warning sirens. As they regained their footing and finally approached the shelter entrance Shinji was grateful for the headgear that muted loud noises as Hikari screamed in his ear and a line of impacts came perilously close to the pair.
Looking back as he pushed Hikari the last few yards Shinji was able to recognize a YF-25 engaging several flying creatures who appeared to be firing some kind of energy pules while the Valkyrie maneuvered in gehrwalk mode to try to get what shots he could. As Hikari began climbing down the ladder Shinji continued to watch and with dread as a Quadluun-Rau came into view crashing to the ground from behind a nearby building as a larger monster followed looking for the kill. Shinji wasn't the only one distracted by this development and it spelled a disastrous result for the Valkyrie pilot who attempted to cover the other pilot as one of their original foes whipped out its tail and piercing the cockpit. The Valkyrie fell into an uncontrolled decent, crashing dangerously close to Shinji as he dove out of the way and triggering the shelter's emergency shutters.
"This is just great, stuck in a battle between monsters and the military and no way to get to safely. Just what were these idiots…" The grumbled complaints died in Shinji's throat as he looked at the powered armor and noticed a face he never expected to see.
"Rei?!"
And here is the first actual chapter. Using the Macross Frontier setting may have been a mistake since it starts off with some brief character introductions and then dives headfirst into an action scene but hopefully this flows alright even though it's a different kind of feel for Shinji falling into this scenario than when Alto did.
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Ch. 1
Shinji was dumbfounded by the revelation that Rei had sortied into battle. He had known she was a pilot but last he had heard she had moved out into company housing for the civilian development and testing firm she worked for. Battle should have been for NUNS forces not someone who had been like an older sister to him after being taken in by his Aunt and Uncle.
He was torn from the tangent his mind had embarked upon when Rei regained her feet using her armor's thrusters and turned to engage the smaller flying creatures as they charged which unfortunately left her open as the larger red creature closed the distance with surprising speed and barreled her into another building and using it's claws to restrict her in a grapple. Realizing that this would not end well for Rei, Shinji turned to the fallen Valkyrie and took a shaky step towards it. Taking a moment to swallow to try to alleviate the dryness in his mouth he clinched his fists and boosted up towards the fallen Valkyrie.
Stupid, stupid, stupid, this has got to be the DUMBEST thing I've ever done but I just can't run and leave her to die. Shinji sighed in relief as he noticed the undamaged co-pilot seat inside the veritech and immediately regretted that action when he was hit by the strong smell of blood. I think I'm gonna be sick he thought as he bit down the nausea and locked into the interface to reboot the unit's controls. The status display across his HUD showed a distressing amount of red including main propulsion system but he still had enough power to move and transform battloid mode and the com channel encryption synced. As he considered the poor state of the craft and felt once more the desperate urge to flee from what was happening he heard something that quickly cast aside all those thoughts.
The long low sound of metal twisting and shearing accompanied by Rei's sobbing scream.
That terrible sound broke something free within Shinji, transforming the fallen veritech all Shinji could hear was his own scream echoing in his ears as he charged the monster, gunpod blazing. All thoughts of fire discipline, strategy, or even self-preservation seemed to be gone from his mind as his gunpod ran dry and he slammed into the monster with enough force to damage his own unit as the monster rocked back, forcing it to drop Rei. As Shinji righted himself he discarded the now useless gunpod and pulled the units blade driving it deep into the neck of his foe. The resulting scream seemed to satisfy something primal in Shinji's rage fueled mentality but the resulting surge from the creature was disastrous for him as a claw severed one already damaged elbow joint and the larger mass of his opponent easily overpowered him and sent him crashing backwards into a building which collapsed under the impact spelling the end of the already damaged fighter.
A dread like he had never felt before hit Shinji as he pulled futilely at the controls of the pinned fighter. Desperate cries of "Move, move, move godamnit MOVE" rang through his mind as a last desperate prayer as he watched energy build up through the beast as it prepared to fire the large cannon on its back. Finally recognizing the futility of his situation Shinji slammed fists down on the flickering console in front of him with a desperate cry of "I don't want to die!" drowning out the unit's alarms as his eyes slammed shut out of fear as a flash and the sound of the explosive discharge seemed to take over everything.
It took a few moments and the thought that dying should have actually felt like something for Shinji to realize that he was still in one piece, a pair of Quadluun-Raus, one red and one green, hovered overhead and what remained of his opponent scattered over the majority of the intersection it had been standing in. An alert crossed his HUD for an all clear and a window burst into view in front of him showing a distracted pilot around Rei's age with a red piloting suit with green and black accents.
"Eren what the hell were you thinking! You damn well know better than," she stopped as her attention turned fully to the window, eyes narrowing as she began again. "You're not Eren, who are you and what are you doing in that unit? What idiotic idea could have EVER driven you to fight that way and where is the pilot who should have been in that unit?"
Shinji was so overwhelmed by the sudden interrogation that his thoughts and words began to jumble over themselves in an unintelligible mess of apologies, half-formed words, and sobs which culminated in the rapid evacuation of Shinji's stomach into his section of the cockpit as the smell and adrenaline crash finally caught up with him. The first pilot's cry of disgust was interrupted by another voice cutting across the channel which was more even in tone and helped Shinji regain some sense of composure as it spoke.
"Alright Asuka we're clear now but we still have a lot of cleanup to take care of and we're on a priority for recovery vehicles. Get that rubble cleared while I see what I can do to help Rei, the interrogation can come later."
Asuka closed the com window with a grudging response of "Alright, Klan" as Shinji felt the fighter shift as what remained of his camera gave a scratchy feed of the red unit begin to move the rubble while the green unit landed just out of sight. By the time the recovery vehicles and crews arrived he was free enough for the emergency release of the cockpit to function and recovery teams in powered frames helped him free of the cockpit and towards a waiting ambulance. He heard the gasps and comments about the state of the original pilot and was glad that leaving the craft had severed the communication circuit to the other pilots, but was still worried about Rei. He tried to ask about her but was firmly guided into the waiting vehicle where he was strapped into a bed and with the slight sting and hiss of a shot he was swallowed into a dreamless slumber.
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Have to prove right off that going berserk physically in a veritech is MUCH less effective than doing so in an evangelion. I know that Shinij knowing how to pilot may seem out of character but there is one small hint as to why early in this chapter and the more full reveal is planned for a later event. I also feel I should note some changes in age made for plot reasons just to have it clear:
Shinji: 16
Toji: 16
Kensuke: 15
Hikari: 16
Rei: 18
Asuka: 17
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Ch. 1
Shinji was dumbfounded by the revelation that Rei had sortied into battle. He had known she was a pilot but last he had heard she had moved out into company housing for the civilian development and testing firm she worked for. Battle should have been for NUNS forces not someone who had been like an older sister to him after being taken in by his Aunt and Uncle.
He was torn from the tangent his mind had embarked upon when Rei regained her feet using her armor's thrusters and turned to engage the smaller flying creatures as they charged which unfortunately left her open as the larger red creature closed the distance with surprising speed and barreled her into another building and using it's claws to restrict her in a grapple. Realizing that this would not end well for Rei, Shinji turned to the fallen Valkyrie and took a shaky step towards it. Taking a moment to swallow to try to alleviate the dryness in his mouth he clinched his fists and boosted up towards the fallen Valkyrie.
Stupid, stupid, stupid, this has got to be the DUMBEST thing I've ever done but I just can't run and leave her to die. Shinji sighed in relief as he noticed the undamaged co-pilot seat inside the veritech and immediately regretted that action when he was hit by the strong smell of blood. I think I'm gonna be sick he thought as he bit down the nausea and locked into the interface to reboot the unit's controls. The status display across his HUD showed a distressing amount of red including main propulsion system but he still had enough power to move and transform battloid mode and the com channel encryption synced. As he considered the poor state of the craft and felt once more the desperate urge to flee from what was happening he heard something that quickly cast aside all those thoughts.
The long low sound of metal twisting and shearing accompanied by Rei's sobbing scream.
That terrible sound broke something free within Shinji, transforming the fallen veritech all Shinji could hear was his own scream echoing in his ears as he charged the monster, gunpod blazing. All thoughts of fire discipline, strategy, or even self-preservation seemed to be gone from his mind as his gunpod ran dry and he slammed into the monster with enough force to damage his own unit as the monster rocked back, forcing it to drop Rei. As Shinji righted himself he discarded the now useless gunpod and pulled the units blade driving it deep into the neck of his foe. The resulting scream seemed to satisfy something primal in Shinji's rage fueled mentality but the resulting surge from the creature was disastrous for him as a claw severed one already damaged elbow joint and the larger mass of his opponent easily overpowered him and sent him crashing backwards into a building which collapsed under the impact spelling the end of the already damaged fighter.
A dread like he had never felt before hit Shinji as he pulled futilely at the controls of the pinned fighter. Desperate cries of "Move, move, move godamnit MOVE" rang through his mind as a last desperate prayer as he watched energy build up through the beast as it prepared to fire the large cannon on its back. Finally recognizing the futility of his situation Shinji slammed fists down on the flickering console in front of him with a desperate cry of "I don't want to die!" drowning out the unit's alarms as his eyes slammed shut out of fear as a flash and the sound of the explosive discharge seemed to take over everything.
It took a few moments and the thought that dying should have actually felt like something for Shinji to realize that he was still in one piece, a pair of Quadluun-Raus, one red and one green, hovered overhead and what remained of his opponent scattered over the majority of the intersection it had been standing in. An alert crossed his HUD for an all clear and a window burst into view in front of him showing a distracted pilot around Rei's age with a red piloting suit with green and black accents.
"Eren what the hell were you thinking! You damn well know better than," she stopped as her attention turned fully to the window, eyes narrowing as she began again. "You're not Eren, who are you and what are you doing in that unit? What idiotic idea could have EVER driven you to fight that way and where is the pilot who should have been in that unit?"
Shinji was so overwhelmed by the sudden interrogation that his thoughts and words began to jumble over themselves in an unintelligible mess of apologies, half-formed words, and sobs which culminated in the rapid evacuation of Shinji's stomach into his section of the cockpit as the smell and adrenaline crash finally caught up with him. The first pilot's cry of disgust was interrupted by another voice cutting across the channel which was more even in tone and helped Shinji regain some sense of composure as it spoke.
"Alright Asuka we're clear now but we still have a lot of cleanup to take care of and we're on a priority for recovery vehicles. Get that rubble cleared while I see what I can do to help Rei, the interrogation can come later."
Asuka closed the com window with a grudging response of "Alright, Klan" as Shinji felt the fighter shift as what remained of his camera gave a scratchy feed of the red unit begin to move the rubble while the green unit landed just out of sight. By the time the recovery vehicles and crews arrived he was free enough for the emergency release of the cockpit to function and recovery teams in powered frames helped him free of the cockpit and towards a waiting ambulance. He heard the gasps and comments about the state of the original pilot and was glad that leaving the craft had severed the communication circuit to the other pilots, but was still worried about Rei. He tried to ask about her but was firmly guided into the waiting vehicle where he was strapped into a bed and with the slight sting and hiss of a shot he was swallowed into a dreamless slumber.
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Have to prove right off that going berserk physically in a veritech is MUCH less effective than doing so in an evangelion. I know that Shinij knowing how to pilot may seem out of character but there is one small hint as to why early in this chapter and the more full reveal is planned for a later event. I also feel I should note some changes in age made for plot reasons just to have it clear:
Shinji: 16
Toji: 16
Kensuke: 15
Hikari: 16
Rei: 18
Asuka: 17
- Location
- Spain
Well, I'll be honest and say that I have never watched Macross (even if I have a general idea of what it is about), so there's a pretty big chance that I may drop out from this story. If only because I'm not going to understand a lot of the stuff unless it's explained, and you might not be willing to go that far.
As for what you have here right now, I'd advice to check some of the punctuation and structure. There are some dialogues and descriptions that could use a once-over, like this one:
And this one:
My main criticism would be that it feels a bit jumbled. There are a lot of actions described in single paragraphs and sometimes that can end up breaking the pace. You might want to look into that.
I'm not commenting on the setting since... well, I know nothing of it.
As for what you have here right now, I'd advice to check some of the punctuation and structure. There are some dialogues and descriptions that could use a once-over, like this one:
And this one:
My main criticism would be that it feels a bit jumbled. There are a lot of actions described in single paragraphs and sometimes that can end up breaking the pace. You might want to look into that.
I'm not commenting on the setting since... well, I know nothing of it.
Ranma-sensei
Sorcerer
- Location
- Citrix Receiver
- Pronouns
- Weatherdependent
I'll have to parrot Gryphon on not knowing much of the setting, but I'll see where it takes me before I decide.
You might want to take on an editor, though; someone to touch up your story, correct mistakes, the works.
Good luck with your writing!
You might want to take on an editor, though; someone to touch up your story, correct mistakes, the works.
Good luck with your writing!
GeshronTyler
Kleiner Giftzwerg
So, what themes are you including from NGE aside from the character's names and some characterization? Shinji desperately trying to connect with his father, who is completely absorbed in his work? Maybe Gendo is researching the Vajra, because his wife was killed by them, or went missing after an attack? He could be involved with Birler (who actually owns SMS) and the Galaxy conspiracy, which could stand in for SEELE. The EVA stand ins might be attempts to "re-engineer" Vajra corpses/cloned bodies as biomechanical machines for human use, requiring fold-crystal implants or the like for "synchronization"- which amount of augmentation/body modification would be illegal on Frontier IIRC.
I've got a few ideas in that regard and how things will tie in and work. The story is likely going to be a bit more Macross-ish than Eva earlier but there are some things that will be done later that will tie in with a lot of what you've been saying (and a few things that may be ideas that will shamelessly be incorporated).
I've been roughing out the next chapter and had hoped to have time to get it ready to post this weekend but work has turned into an absolute monster and I've been a bit too exhausted to really get into the writing. I know what the next scene is and how I'm going to frame a portion of it but with some of the other critiques of the haphazard formatting of my the prologue and first chapter bit (which really should have been on longish chapter with some editing for brevity) I want to take a bit more time to really have it more feasibly written instead of the raw stream of consciousness type writing I had before. Looking to get a RL friend to try beta-ing the chapters as I think that would help.
I've been roughing out the next chapter and had hoped to have time to get it ready to post this weekend but work has turned into an absolute monster and I've been a bit too exhausted to really get into the writing. I know what the next scene is and how I'm going to frame a portion of it but with some of the other critiques of the haphazard formatting of my the prologue and first chapter bit (which really should have been on longish chapter with some editing for brevity) I want to take a bit more time to really have it more feasibly written instead of the raw stream of consciousness type writing I had before. Looking to get a RL friend to try beta-ing the chapters as I think that would help.
GeshronTyler
Kleiner Giftzwerg
Some of the inspiration for the idea of "Vajra as bio-mechs piloted by humans" comes from the Macross: Frontier Movie (either One or Two) where an Individual Vajra attacks during Sheryl's concert, and captures Ranka inside a body cavity and tries to escape with her. That would imply that Vajra could be theoretically made to provide life support for humans. While the canonical feats of manufacturing the factory satellites and factory ships like the 3-Stars are pretty darn amazing, the idea of a self-repairing superdimensional-capable "vehicle" that could conceivably continuing growing and developing into something like the cruiser/battleship/carrier variants of the Vajra would be pretty seductive for some people.
Iirc, Ranka can survive in short periods in space due to her Zentradi heritage.
GeshronTyler
Kleiner Giftzwerg
That would also seem to be true, I think there was just such a scene in first one or two TV episodes, and possibly in the first movie.
In the 2nd Movie (IIRC), Rsnja was actually absorbed/swallowed by one of the Vajra Soldiers, you can see her appearing to be floating in some kind of bubble.
ecs05norway
Zenryoku Zenkai!
Ranka gets blown out of the habitat dome on Macross Frontier, yes, in the first couple of episodes. Thus leading Alto to demonstrate one of the new remote-piloting features of the Valkyrie/EX-Gear interface: "Hey, I fell out of the cockpit, come pick me up!"*.
Ranka is never outside the stream of escaping atmosphere from the ship, however, so I don't think it's a terribly good example of her resilience in vacuum.
*: Actually, given that Alto is a civilian - if in a pilot-training track in high school - who has probably never touched a modern military Valk in his life, it's probably not all that new.
Ranka is never outside the stream of escaping atmosphere from the ship, however, so I don't think it's a terribly good example of her resilience in vacuum.
*: Actually, given that Alto is a civilian - if in a pilot-training track in high school - who has probably never touched a modern military Valk in his life, it's probably not all that new.
Bit of a raw teaser (no edits yet) of what's in the works, just to keep this up and make sure I don't let this drop. At about 1200 words raw and still have to finish out a chunk of the scene.
"An unfamiliar ceiling. I wonder where I'm at now" Shinji wondered aloud to himself as he began to shift to full wakefulness. Sitting up he took in the room around him as he sat up noting the sterile surroundings and the bank of monitors to the right side of the bed. <Hospital it is then. I hope they told my Aunt and Uncle I'm safe. Wait, what about Rei.> As the panicked thought entered his mind it was just as quickly interrupted by the sound of the door as a scruffy looking man who appeared about 30 entered the room. The most notable thing about his clothes was the Black jacket lined with purple and a yellow logo he didn't recognize on the left breast. He strolled in with a casual nod and pulled a chair around to sit backwards in it facing Shinji.
Give the thread 3 guesses as to who gets an earlier than his cannon addition to the cast (though I think you'll likely need just 1)
"An unfamiliar ceiling. I wonder where I'm at now" Shinji wondered aloud to himself as he began to shift to full wakefulness. Sitting up he took in the room around him as he sat up noting the sterile surroundings and the bank of monitors to the right side of the bed. <Hospital it is then. I hope they told my Aunt and Uncle I'm safe. Wait, what about Rei.> As the panicked thought entered his mind it was just as quickly interrupted by the sound of the door as a scruffy looking man who appeared about 30 entered the room. The most notable thing about his clothes was the Black jacket lined with purple and a yellow logo he didn't recognize on the left breast. He strolled in with a casual nod and pulled a chair around to sit backwards in it facing Shinji.
Give the thread 3 guesses as to who gets an earlier than his cannon addition to the cast (though I think you'll likely need just 1)
Last edited:
Ranma-sensei
Sorcerer
- Location
- Citrix Receiver
- Pronouns
- Weatherdependent