- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Deal. Accordingly, you now also receive a Mild Consequence whenever you make a combat roll.
Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
-
- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
- Location
- Texas
Deal. Rocket tag, here we come.
- Pronouns
- She/Her/They/Them
I love this so much
Ah, shit. Always with the whiplash!
Granny Kiho is great. I like her!
Oh that's a cute name!
damned cat-like Kurosawa bloodline. how are they not only so agile but also so flexible? I'm hyperlax and I can't do that. Cheating bloodline stinkers.
Tsunade is going to mooch all of Mari's cred at this rate
They also teach you this if you're going to be an instructor. As soon as you're in charge of helping other people, you realise how much more efficient everything would be if they would simply stop whatever dumb thing they're doing
ALWAYS WITH THE WHIPLASH. ALWAYS
- Location
- USA
Claw of Cannai
Paper Seal
A seal that produces a Lightning natured chakra construct centered on a weapon.
Attacks with the construct are as follows:
1) +1 to Weapon Rating for the weapon the seal is applied to. Eg. Kunai would become Weapons:2
2) The attack is converted to Energy:Lightning damage, half of which bypasses Armor:Energy, as per most attack Lightning ninjutsu
3) The attacks of the weapon affect chakra constructs otherwise unaffected by physical weapons. Eg. the flame shades from Chaper 614.
Strangely, the shape of the chakra construct resembles the paw of a Dog, with claws extended, ready to gash.
The effect dissipates after one successful attack or 1 minute, whichever comes first.
This seal is compatible with thrown weapons like kunai, or held weapons like the Pangolin gauntlets and Satsuko, or Yuma's spear.
Paper Seal
A seal that produces a Lightning natured chakra construct centered on a weapon.
Attacks with the construct are as follows:
1) +1 to Weapon Rating for the weapon the seal is applied to. Eg. Kunai would become Weapons:2
2) The attack is converted to Energy:Lightning damage, half of which bypasses Armor:Energy, as per most attack Lightning ninjutsu
3) The attacks of the weapon affect chakra constructs otherwise unaffected by physical weapons. Eg. the flame shades from Chaper 614.
Strangely, the shape of the chakra construct resembles the paw of a Dog, with claws extended, ready to gash.
The effect dissipates after one successful attack or 1 minute, whichever comes first.
This seal is compatible with thrown weapons like kunai, or held weapons like the Pangolin gauntlets and Satsuko, or Yuma's spear.
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@eaglejarl @Paperclipped @Velorien
Can Reo tell if some of the undecipherable notes we got from Oro are Technique Hacking XP lootboxes? If he can tell, are they?
Can Reo tell if some of the undecipherable notes we got from Oro are Technique Hacking XP lootboxes? If he can tell, are they?
- Location
- United States
Can we call this a Claw of Cannai?
I just like the idea of making enemy ninja take our CoC to their face.
I will obey the will of the thread.
Vote like if you want the change to CoC, vote heart if you want to keep it FoC (perhaps you don't give a fuck). Or suggest another name!
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Silhouette of Cannai
Paper Seal
A seal that makes a dog shaped lightning construct to hang out with you and be your bro. Can't move more than a zone from the source seal, seal can't be moved once activated. Idk mauls enemies too or something
Interlude: Chasing Shadows
- Location
- USA
Interlude: Chasing Shadows
"Lord Hokage."
Asuma nodded and quickly gestured for his guest to sit down.
"First of all, my congratulations," Uchiha Sasuke said, placing down his gift on the table.
Asuma laughed. "Relax, Sasuke. Your congratulations are well received, and I'll give Kurenai your well wishes. Because of the happy event that put me in this situation, I'm in a good mood. We can leave the formality behind today. What did you need from me?"
Sasuke waited for a moment, and Asuma handed him a gift of his own. Sasuke considered the puzzle the Hokage prepared for him. It was a complicated piece of knotwork, with strings of various materials – twine, rubber, steel wire of varying thicknesses – all entangled into a complex ball. Apparently it had been a civilian pastime originally, but some ninja had discovered or decided that the process of disentangling the various strands was similar to the process of shaping chakra flows in a ninjutsu, and before long it had become a hobby and unofficial training tool for technique hackers. Sasuke did not believe the puzzles did anything meaningful, but constructing and solving them were both intriguing challenges.
He picked up the tangle and started to pick at it, feeling which areas were under tension and which were not.
"I came to ask about my brother. Your career as a ninja overlapped his, didn't it? I want to know everything that you remember about him."
Asuma sighed, picking up Sasuke's carefully crafted tangle to examine it. "I did, yes. I know you must want revenge on him, Sasuke, but caution and patience are the virtues our village needs right now. He is powerful, and we could not afford to cross Akatsuki if we dared."
Sasuke nodded, picking a stretch of rubber and pulling at it until a loop of twine within the tangle shifted to a new location. Complexity reduced, now easier to understand.
"I understand," he said. "I will not do anything rash."
Asuma nodded, eyes going distant.
"In a way, his story also began at the Nine Tails attack," Asuma said. "I was only a genin at the time. I didn't care at all about keeping an eye on Academy students, but the people that did had noticed his... excellence."
There was really no other word for it. His brother had been an excellent ninja in every way that mattered. Agility, stealth, ninjutsu, and deception. Tactics, strategy, and the ability to close his heart to emotion.
"In the wake of the Nine Tails attack and the death of the Fourth, we- rather, my father and Leaf's senior leadership, needed a new hero to champion Leaf. The First had possessed a certain magic that the Second, for all his genius, didn't. My father was growing old, and just as the Fourth took the Hat, he was slain. Jiraiya and Tsunade had both left Leaf on various long-term assignments so that they could grapple with their demons, and Orochimaru... While he appeared to be a model ninja at the time, I think even then my father could tell that he had a seed of evil in his heart.
"Meanwhile, your brother was shattering every barrier we'd known before. Fugaku trained him every day after the Academy, and by his second year, he'd already learned the basics of adhesion, repulsion, and seal-pulsing. They moved him up by a year. He struggled for a week, kept pace with his peers for a month, then exceeded them again.
"Orochimaru's defection, the year after the Nine Tails attack, was the final straw. On the one hand, we all counted our blessings that Orochimaru hadn't forced a confrontation in the middle of Leaf. He wouldn't have defeated my father – and at the time, he may not even have survived the battle – but the rebuilding Leaf didn't need a second battle of titans in its streets, and Orochimaru had already demonstrated his willingness to summon Manda in critical fights. On the other hand, the clans hated my father for his decision not to hunt Orochimaru down despite all the clan secrets he'd stolen. I couldn't tell you whether the clans were right that sentimentality played a role in my father's decision. Still, I do not believe he was wrong to prioritize preserving Leaf's power as a whole, and ensuring the village's unity was a part of that. He needed a successor. And your brother, Sasuke, presented the perfect candidate."
Asuma paused to sip at his water and pick at the tangle. Sasuke hadn't invested nearly enough time in the art of constructing the puzzles, and Asuma quickly found a critical knot, sloughing off half of the tangle's mass in a single tug. The Hokage started slowly sifting through the retrieved threads, separating them, sorting them, and aligning them neatly on the low tea table.
"I would have been... sixteen, just promoted to chūnin," Asuma said. "He graduated yet another year ahead of schedule, age ten. I believe that's right, he was nine years your senior, but I may not be remembering the exact numbers correctly. I remember thinking that he was too young to be a ninja, but for what little I asked around, everyone said that he was ready. Maybe not as strong as the average genin graduating in the fullness of their time, but almost there, and ready to learn from field experience instead of repetitive classes catered to the average ninja.
"He exceeded expectations. In three years, he was my equal in rank. In two more, he earned the rank of full jōnin, outranking me. I never had to take orders from him, but I tried to imagine it. Occasionally, you have to deal with a younger squad leader, but it was unnerving to think that a kid, who should have been a genin in any other world, would be able to command me around, by that point a seasoned and senior chūnin.
"But you already know the numbers. What really mattered was the story he had. Everyone knew his name. The younger ninja looked up to him. Teachers told their students that they needed to study if they wanted to be like him. Sage, I think my aunt once told my little sister that she needed to eat all the food on her plate if she wanted to grow up to be like your brother. We envied him and his fame. Criers told the town squares about his missions, street actors re-enacted them, and everyone knew what he was going to be."
"The next Hashirama," Sasuke said. Working his way through the tangle, he'd found a curved and polished section of bone at its core. He tried to pull it free, but too many different threads had looped around the section of bone, tension holding it stable in the center of the tangle. Still, it created an objective. Starting from the stretchy, deformable rubber, he started to loosen its bonds.
Asuma nodded. "That's right. He may not have had the same raw charisma and force of personality that had made seven clans pin their banners beneath Hashirama's, but he had a quiet, relatable friendliness to him that captured the people's adoration just as much. Of course, it helped that every single one of Leaf's propaganda machines were aimed at this course. He wasn't meant to be a normal ninja – even as an ANBU, the level of publicity his missions got made him more of a giant fire dragon to be feared than a hidden blade in the night."
"But it failed."
Asuma considered again for a long moment. "That's right. It failed. You know that part."
Sasuke did. He could never forget.
"Two years after his promotion, he was already one of Leaf's strongest jōnin. He couldn't trade blow-for-blow with Gai's taijutsu, and he couldn't match Kakashi's breadth of ninjutsu, but it was close. In open spars, where he could abuse his genjutsu as much as he liked, he got the better of them sometimes. Not the majority of the time, but a seventeen year old kid doesn't ever get the better of senior ninja like Kakashi by chance.
"Well, you know what happened as well as I do. Did he break under the pressure? Did he push his mind too far with genjutsu or shadow clones? Did he get corrupted by some foreign agent? We don't know."
Sasuke nodded, picking at the tangle. One night. Ninety deaths. Almost every single ninja in the clan, and all the collateral damage that a high-level ninja fight in a crowded civilian district was bound to cause.
The end of the Uchiha.
"After that night, a spell broke. Unlike with Orochimaru, my father was quick to send out plenty of hunter squads to track him down alongside his stolen Summoning Scroll. His name was quickly erased from any sorts of plays or propaganda, and everyone but the upper echelon tried to forget he ever existed. Now, he's a shadow. Some of the older civilians might remember the name from a long time ago, might even remember him as a famous ninja of Leaf, but they won't remember the mistakes we made with him. As for Leaf's ninja, all but the most senior ones will remember him for his final deed. He's someone to be hated, not commemorated."
Sasuke accepted the Hokage's words and continued to work on the tangle in silence. The bone was mostly held in place by a band of twine. It would be easy enough to snap, then the whole puzzle would fall apart… but it wasn't the intended solution. He twisted his fingers, trying to loosen the knotwork.
Asuma let him think, steadily dismantling Sasuke's tangle and stacking up the components on the table.
"But you didn't stop," Sasuke said. "Leaf didn't stop. We still want a new Hashirama. The thing you – no, the Third did to my brother, it's the same thing that the Third did to Naruto."
Asuma smiled, bittersweet. "In a way. You remember the circumstances of my election, Sasuke. I am not the leader Leaf needs. I'm the leader she was left with by tragedy after tragedy. I may have earned the strength to play at Hokage, but strength, bearing, and common sense make only a leader, not a Hashirama. I don't have what it takes for that. I can admit my weaknesses, and now that I'm well into my thirties, I can tell that I never will have what it takes for that.
"You're wrong, though. There's a subtle difference. I don't think my father or Lord Fifth ever wanted to turn Naruto into the next Hashirama. I think that's what they learned from this affair, from this mistake of theirs. The time for people like Hashirama has come and passed. I think they wanted Naruto to become the next Minato."
Sasuke frowned. "Hashirama and Minato were different people, of course. But I don't think I understand what you mean by the comparison. Can you explain the difference?"
Asuma shook his head. "This is important to you, and it would be worth it for you to contemplate and research it to figure out the difference on your own. Knowledge created is closer to your heart than knowledge casually given, of course. Speaking of taking your thoughts with you," Asuma said, pulling apart Sasuke's final interlaced steel threads and setting them aside, "I do need to go for my next appointment. Feel free to keep the tangle."
He stood, and Sasuke did as well, bowing to his Hokage and murmuring his niceties before leaving deep in thought, the puzzle clutched absentmindedly in his palm.
Leaf had tried to craft themselves a second Hashirama. They had failed, and created another Madara instead. What would happen if they could not create their Minato? What would Naruto become?
- Location
- United States
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Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Tsukuyomi + Shadow Clone
- Location
- Texas
I think Talent was rebalanced to be able to go past 5/day, so likely that plus the early apprenticeship to Fugaku and SC training.
ASUMA: We need a new Minato.
HAZOU: I am standing! Right here!
HAZOU: I am standing! Right here!
- Pronouns
- He/Him
When did he get those things though? He was breaking barriers way before it seems like he would have either one
- Location
- Yes.
Is it just me or is Asuma a bit younger than he should be?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
I think it may also be because Itachi was aged up some but idk
- Location
- USA
Right now, I think Asuma is 32.
- Location
- United States
Fun fact this is often believed to be the age people are in Islamic Heaven.
He whined so hard at school they moved him up two years
- Location
- Book Fort
- Pronouns
- They/Them
Leaf totally would've moved Hazou up early. Darned Mist, not knowing what they had.
Nah, we weren't that talented, we're like a low jounin level talent-wise, or that's where we'd most likely peak at if we didn't chance onto a Sealing Scroll / SSA / SC / become a Clan Head, or live forever by ninja standards in general. Without OOC exp and FOOM it'd take us until our late 30s to even be able to fight a low tier S-rank like Gai, Kakashi or Zabuza, and that's if we were a combat spec.
I mean a ninja graduates the Academy at 12 yo with 1k XP, then we'd have gotten 3.5 XP per day so 1278 XP per year and that's with 0 stagnation whatsoever, so if we never ran into any stagnation barriers at all (which is very unlikely), we'd hit 15k XP (jounin) by 23 yo and ~26.6k XP by the time we were Asuma's age (32), likely a bit less than him, and that's the ideal scenario if we constantly risked our life, without access to S-rank bullshit.
In comparison Itachi graduated at age 10, Asuma mentions him being a match for a new genin (1k XP) by then. Then he made chuunin by 13 and full jounin by 15. I'd expect full jounin to mean 15k XP. Which gives us an XP rate of ~7.7 XP / day over the period, since age 10, most likely a bit less before all the apprenticeships he got and a bit more after. If he exactly maintained that and didn't run into stagnancies like in our example above, he'd get to 61.8k XP by age 32, to our 26.6k, which he'd pass by age 19, so thats the kind of talent it takes to skip two years in the academy. It was mentioned that by age 17 (20.6k XP at the pace) he was already in striking range of Kakashi and Gai, though weaker. Thats more XP than we'll have at the same age (14.5k) even with years worth of OOC XP, FOOM and suffering zero stagnancy mechanics for the majority of the story.
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- Location
- USA
I think this is most of what you know, but I'm no expert.
For what it's worth, stagnancy would have been pretty rare on 3.5XP/day - around once every 5 months. Assuming alt!Hazou was still a combat/sealing spec, he'd need to take a tough combat mission and do a challenging sealing project ~once a year each. This seems extremely manageable to me.
Otherwise, good analysis. Safe to assume that Itachi by now has suffered greatly from stagnancy.