Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
1) Yeah sure I'll edit it in.
2) Me naming names explicitly doesn't do anything but waste word count. Track info down on (Insert list of 6-7 people) is just needlessly verbose, isn't it?
I'll add "Get the akatsuki book" later.
Right. I'll do the switcharoo on the order and edit that back in (minus the CCnJ) later tonight.
- Location
- Denmark
I'd suggest not doing anything that could be misconstrued as asking Ino out on a date until after we've clarified that we did not, in fact, have an orgy planned.
Maybe save the lunch for the next plan, and instead add "damage control and clarification regarding the orgy" to happen the very next day? I'm pretty sure that we don't want to let this rumor spread. Jiraiya would likely find it hilarious in the short-term, but I doubt that it'll do us any good in the long-term, whereas there is some potential for it to damage us.
Fair enough.
Hmmm.... I think the plan could use some polish in a number of areas o better guide the QMs as to our intentions and exactly how we want to accomplish things. Remember, creative ideas on how to do a thing as oppose to 'QMs figure it out' earn more xp. Let me lay out some thoughts.
First, I think we should give some approximate percentages of how much time Hazou should spend on each of these. Here's a for-purposes-of-example
R&D with Kagome - ~25% of waking time (mornings)
Training from Hell - ~50% of waking time (after lunch into evenings)
Relaxing - ~10% of waking time (lunches; evenings)
Misc - ~15% of waking time (as required)
This list needs to be prioritized. As it is, Hazou might end doing some on each of them and accomplish none. Here are my suggestions. Naturally you'll want to compact the working.
1. Determine if practical to adapt Casino seals for in-combat chakra sensing within a month; if so, first priority. If not, Extra-Capacity Storage seals are first priority.
2. Ask Kagome if he could review Mountain seals on his own time and determine roughly what they do. No reason for Hazou to do it when he can probably give at least a rough idea what they do much more quickly.
I think we should consider if there's specific training ideas that could earn more xp for Alertness and Chakra Capacity, two high priorities. For Alertness I have suggestions; "Lose a Sense" training. Go blindfolded. Plug up ears. Also, ask Kagome to prepare a trap field full of training exlosive seals and find your way through it... at speed.
For chakra capacity, maybe consult with Medical and find the best way to exercise it?
For Ebisu, be proactive about what we want him to teach. Maybe ask him for more experience fighting solo duels? Hazou isn't used to fighting solo really; most of his fights have been as part of a team.
Frankly I see little benefit in Hazou trying to play detective and track down the origin of the orgy rumor. It's wasting valuable time he could be spending on refreshing seals and tracking down opponent info.
Second, I think it would be helpful to have an idea *how* to track down infor. I have three suggestions:
1. Bingo books.
2. Try to find ninja who have fought Hot Springs ninja before; Ebisu might know who to ask.
3. Pass the job off and ask Mari to use her social skills to do the research for you.
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
First off, wow that was quite the update. I'm glad that people seemed to enjoy themselves (especially with so many Goketsu unavailable one way or another) until the whole orgy thing came up. At least Hazou's blunder near the end is the kind of blunder people will be able to recognize as one in retrospect (if they don't already get it, given how vehemently Hazou opposed Anko's 'misunderstandings').
Shiori, Shiori, Shiori. I wonder what'll happen to you when you finally realize that all of the perversion you saw in the Goketsu came from your brain instead? After all, tonight she very nearly started an orgy simply because she expected it to happen.
Contrast this with a quest format, which is much like a regular story in many respects including the one where characters are much more fleshed out and observed in detail than they would be in a roleplay. In such a context, the natural progression of social interactions can be fully modeled and you don't need social combat to determine the shape and result.
The biggest real concern I think might arise from that is the trivialization of social stats, as a character's characterization becomes more important than the XP put into those stats, but as you have shown it's perfectly viable to have stats inform characterization (Keiko's tendency to rely on intimidation, for example) and thus inform her actual behaviour. In that sense, Keiko's social stats are not trivialized as much as they are made indirect, which isn't necessarily a bad thing for them.
Shiori, Shiori, Shiori. I wonder what'll happen to you when you finally realize that all of the perversion you saw in the Goketsu came from your brain instead? After all, tonight she very nearly started an orgy simply because she expected it to happen.
I've been thinking that in Fate, the whole social combat thing was facilitated by the fact that the players were only approximating their characters, so the natural progression of social interactions could only be estimated at best. Social combat, then, provided a way to determine the shape and outcome of a social interaction and let the players fill in the gaps with character-specific details.
Contrast this with a quest format, which is much like a regular story in many respects including the one where characters are much more fleshed out and observed in detail than they would be in a roleplay. In such a context, the natural progression of social interactions can be fully modeled and you don't need social combat to determine the shape and result.
The biggest real concern I think might arise from that is the trivialization of social stats, as a character's characterization becomes more important than the XP put into those stats, but as you have shown it's perfectly viable to have stats inform characterization (Keiko's tendency to rely on intimidation, for example) and thus inform her actual behaviour. In that sense, Keiko's social stats are not trivialized as much as they are made indirect, which isn't necessarily a bad thing for them.
Who do you think J was talking to? What sort of device would the Perve Sage and habit of peeping on women in the hot springs find useful for hot springs from his high tower?
On the plus side, it sounds as if he's had the same insight about their potential for people with skytowers or skywalkers and is looking into making them standard equipment. The Hyuga are going to be pissed.
Hey, new trade good for the pangolins? Their eyes are notoriously weak and that must be limiting their skytower benefits.
Also, if we're handing out pets, we still need to get Noburi one of those mind-chickens. Kagome probably knows how to deal with them as food if nothing else.
Nothing is going up convince people that the Perve Sage didn't throw an orgy. The rumor is just too juicy. At this point damage control is going to involve placating people who are offended that they weren't invited. That's probably going to involve throwing more orgies, so best make plans to be out of the house a few nights while J and Mari deal with that.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
It's more the other way around. Keiko's characterisation results in a lot of XP going into Intimidation. Characters put XP into things that matter to them; things do not start mattering to them because they've put XP in them.
- Location
- Yes.
...we need to get levels in Empathy. We need to get waaay more levels in Empathy.
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
How does this follow from the post you're quoting?
Emstar
The Shining One
- Location
- Trapped in an extradimensional rift.
- Pronouns
- She/They
I suppose the weird Dichotomy is how this works with Hazou.Taking things to extemes: We can have him spend a few months on people skills, but not putting any actual XP into it reflects no progress on that front or something?
Perhaps we are going about it in a roundabout way, but a more direct way of asking what I think some are trying to ask is the following:
So like, spending some time IC on this AND devoting a healthy amount of XP to the issue will surely make Hazou less of a dumbass when it comes to social stuff , right?
- Location
- Yes.
...is...is Hazou an exception to the rule?
- Location
- The Maple Syrup Mountains
It sounds like it works both ways, to be honest. Characterization informs where their stats should be placed, but if they place new stats in new places that also informs their characterization. Someone can want to understand other people better than they currently do, which suggests both a lack of Empathy and a willingness to put XP into Empathy. Then, once they put XP into Empathy, representing IC time spent trying to learn how to understand people better, their characterization can move a portion of the way from 'wants to be good at understanding people' to 'good at understanding people'.
Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
Alright, security blanket in place and now it's time to read.
Ominous title but it could mean anything at this point so lets approach with this with an open mind.
With how often we barely missed the telescope merchant, I believe Hazou and he now qualify as star-crossed lovers in the romantic comedy that is MfD. I hope the story will have a happy ending where they finally meet and show each other their telescopes.
Aww, Keiko, you rock. It's nice to see her take initiative for something she cares deeply about.
Loving this paragraph, very well written.
Haha, Tobikomi. Just like Tobi; what a nice coincidence. And he is so nice to Keiko, too.
Something tells me this has nothing to do with the telescopes themselves but what they allow you to see. Maybe something like this? But with older ladies, I am sure. No way this chapter is going to have any double entendres or implied sexual content with teenagers.
Unrelated note: How much of a faux pas would it be for Hiashi to find out the Hokage is spying on his kunoichi? Would he feel threatened that the Goketsu are trying to break into the peeping business that the Byakugan monopolizes or will we be fine?
@eaglejarl @Velorien @OliWhail: What does Hazou think?
I am sure Keiko understand this sweet, innocent man means well and that she will drop the issue at once.
Oh dear. Ah well, she will get over it, I am sure. Sweet, well adjusted Keiko. It's perfectly normal to feel this way as long as you move on and don't act on these thoug-
Sage damn it, Keiko, you scary. It's terrifying to see her take initiative for something she cares deeply about.
We never should have encouraged this side of her. What if the lack of agency was not a bug but a feature of the Mori to stop them from murdering everyone?
Well, I guess it's going to be one of those chapters then.
*Grips security blanked more tightly*
Lets do this.
A fine choice, totally not evil or anything.
On a related note, I looked up the name Tobikomi and "komi" is Japanese for "Corrupter of Innocents"*. In hindsight, the "Tobi" part of the name is clearly a reference to the major Naruto villain who was responsible for most of the suffering in the setting and I no longer believe Tobikomi is as innocent as I thought. And neither is, you know, Keiko.
She is clearly an Akatsuki sleeper agent and the candy was the trigger toreboot (?) wake her.
All in all, pretty good foreshadowing there, Velorien.
It all makes sense now: Keiko's high Intimidation score, her being an outcast in Mist due to being a seasoned missing-nin trying to act like a little girl - all while masterfully manipulating all of us into feeling pity for her and making us drop our guard.
*Trust me on this, no need to double check.
No, Jiraiya! This is a terrible, terrible idea. Stop provoking Keiko, maybe there is still a chance we can avert this disaster by appealing to her atrophied good side.
I guess she isn't even trying to be subtle anymore, then. Surely she understands she is no match for Jiraiya as long as he is protected by his elite guards?
Oh, welp. Nevermind then. Jiraiya is as good as dead by the time update ends, I am now sure of it.
How can I be so sure, you ask? Because this scene is clearly intended as a mirror to the canon Hiruzen-Orochimaru stand off: Hiruzen found out that his student and pseudo-son was irredeemably evil but still let him go.
And we all know how that worked out for him in the end.
Though maybe I am wrong and there is a still a chance we can turn this around. Keiko seemed reasonable before, right? What if we come up with a plan to deescal-
...
*throws away blanket*
[X] (lethal) Yes
It's like watching a horror movie and seeing one of the dumb protagonists poke The Evil Monster. We all know how it's going to end but we still enjoy watching it.
Well, looks like someone is going to get murdered-
...with words? OK, what is going on?
Huh.
Soooooo, does she just roll Intimidation on every social interaction by accident at this point or something?
Also, maybe I overreacted. What if we can direct Keiko's loathing of the world and everyone in it for the Greater Good and train her to only murder objectively evil people? You know, like Dexter? Maybe we don't have to reboot the setting after all.
@MadScientist: Would this be salvagable if we specced Empathy for Keiko?
You keep using thatword phrase, I do not think it means what you think it means. You use it suspiciously often, in fact.
What are you trying to tell us, Evil Author Man?
Wait a minute! I think I finally got it. How were we so stupid to miss all this foreshadowing?!
Akatsuki agent Keiko will burn down all of Leaf, torture everyone in it, steal all the remaining Sharingan - which she previously activated by killing her only love Tenten - and become the new protagonist.
All the pieces fit.
Well done, Velorien.
Well done.
This should probably shock me but my mind is too busy thinking about how Keiko is going to murder everyone before the end of the night.
On the other hand, it seems like Keiko would look favorably upon Hanabi and she might spare her like Itachi did with Sasuke.
Maybe even take her under wing; every evil mentor deserves to have an evil student, after all.
This chapter is just plot twist after plot twist. Is Hanabi implying she is also a sleeper agent and she knew Keiko from before her deep cover mission? Or does she equate Keiko to Jashin in terms of bloodthirst and pure evil?
Then again, she refers to Jashin as "Him" so surely not?
Sage damn it! She was talking about Keiko.
Not that it matters at this point but damn you, woman. This is Hazou's Quest thread not yours. Take your plans of disturbing the world order and your agency to your own thread. Someone should really report her since I am pretty sure it is frowned upon interfering with other people's quests.
Yes, I wonder what she might be doing. Probably sitting in her room, smiling and thinking happy thoughts and not painstakingly planning everyone's deaths.
She knows.
Shiori knows about the Sunset Racer. Maybe having Keiko kill her before we try to stop her would be acceptable after all?
Kurenai seems like such a good person. Maybe in an alternate universe where Kurenai was Keiko's sensei she could have helped her channel her powers for good. But alas, it was not meant to be.
You and everybody else. Is the date supposed to be a distraction for whatever Keiko is planning? Anyone got any ideas?
You, uh, typo'd. I think.
The word you are looking for is "persuade(someone)todosomethingbymeansofdeceptionorflattery".
I knew it! I predicted that the Hyuuga used their Byakugan primarily to peep on other people. Is it considered conceited to quote yourself in the same post you predicted this in? Then again, what do I care, the quest is ending soon anyway.
So here is me, doing it:
These were simpler, happier times...
Oh crap. If we die before the update ends there really won't be any chance to turn this wreck around. Maybe there is still time:
[X] Action Plan: Kill Keiko
Goals
Celebration Time
On the other hand, an orgy sounds fun, too.
[O] Orgy Plan: Kill Boredom with an Orgy
Orgy
Orgy Time
Well, that was a lot to process.
My overall chapter rating.
Happy at first, then the realization that we have to kill Keiko hit me. The orgy was nice, though.
I hope there aren't too many typos left in here but this post took me waaaaaaaaaaay to long to make as it is.
Ominous title but it could mean anything at this point so lets approach with this with an open mind.
With how often we barely missed the telescope merchant, I believe Hazou and he now qualify as star-crossed lovers in the romantic comedy that is MfD. I hope the story will have a happy ending where they finally meet and show each other their telescopes.
Aww, Keiko, you rock. It's nice to see her take initiative for something she cares deeply about.
Loving this paragraph, very well written.
Haha, Tobikomi. Just like Tobi; what a nice coincidence. And he is so nice to Keiko, too.
Something tells me this has nothing to do with the telescopes themselves but what they allow you to see. Maybe something like this? But with older ladies, I am sure. No way this chapter is going to have any double entendres or implied sexual content with teenagers.
Unrelated note: How much of a faux pas would it be for Hiashi to find out the Hokage is spying on his kunoichi? Would he feel threatened that the Goketsu are trying to break into the peeping business that the Byakugan monopolizes or will we be fine?
@eaglejarl @Velorien @OliWhail: What does Hazou think?
I am sure Keiko understand this sweet, innocent man means well and that she will drop the issue at once.
Oh dear. Ah well, she will get over it, I am sure. Sweet, well adjusted Keiko. It's perfectly normal to feel this way as long as you move on and don't act on these thoug-
Sage damn it, Keiko, you scary. It's terrifying to see her take initiative for something she cares deeply about.
We never should have encouraged this side of her. What if the lack of agency was not a bug but a feature of the Mori to stop them from murdering everyone?
Well, I guess it's going to be one of those chapters then.
*Grips security blanked more tightly*
Lets do this.
A fine choice, totally not evil or anything.
On a related note, I looked up the name Tobikomi and "komi" is Japanese for "Corrupter of Innocents"*. In hindsight, the "Tobi" part of the name is clearly a reference to the major Naruto villain who was responsible for most of the suffering in the setting and I no longer believe Tobikomi is as innocent as I thought. And neither is, you know, Keiko.
She is clearly an Akatsuki sleeper agent and the candy was the trigger to
All in all, pretty good foreshadowing there, Velorien.
It all makes sense now: Keiko's high Intimidation score, her being an outcast in Mist due to being a seasoned missing-nin trying to act like a little girl - all while masterfully manipulating all of us into feeling pity for her and making us drop our guard.
*Trust me on this, no need to double check.
No, Jiraiya! This is a terrible, terrible idea. Stop provoking Keiko, maybe there is still a chance we can avert this disaster by appealing to her atrophied good side.
I guess she isn't even trying to be subtle anymore, then. Surely she understands she is no match for Jiraiya as long as he is protected by his elite guards?
Oh, welp. Nevermind then. Jiraiya is as good as dead by the time update ends, I am now sure of it.
How can I be so sure, you ask? Because this scene is clearly intended as a mirror to the canon Hiruzen-Orochimaru stand off: Hiruzen found out that his student and pseudo-son was irredeemably evil but still let him go.
And we all know how that worked out for him in the end.
It didn't.
Though maybe I am wrong and there is a still a chance we can turn this around. Keiko seemed reasonable before, right? What if we come up with a plan to deescal-
...
*throws away blanket*
[X] (lethal) Yes
It's like watching a horror movie and seeing one of the dumb protagonists poke The Evil Monster. We all know how it's going to end but we still enjoy watching it.
Well, looks like someone is going to get murdered-
...with words? OK, what is going on?
Huh.
Soooooo, does she just roll Intimidation on every social interaction by accident at this point or something?
Also, maybe I overreacted. What if we can direct Keiko's loathing of the world and everyone in it for the Greater Good and train her to only murder objectively evil people? You know, like Dexter? Maybe we don't have to reboot the setting after all.
@MadScientist: Would this be salvagable if we specced Empathy for Keiko?
You keep using that
What are you trying to tell us, Evil Author Man?
Wait a minute! I think I finally got it. How were we so stupid to miss all this foreshadowing?!
Akatsuki agent Keiko will burn down all of Leaf, torture everyone in it, steal all the remaining Sharingan - which she previously activated by killing her only love Tenten - and become the new protagonist.
All the pieces fit.
Well done, Velorien.
Well done.
This should probably shock me but my mind is too busy thinking about how Keiko is going to murder everyone before the end of the night.
On the other hand, it seems like Keiko would look favorably upon Hanabi and she might spare her like Itachi did with Sasuke.
Maybe even take her under wing; every evil mentor deserves to have an evil student, after all.
This chapter is just plot twist after plot twist. Is Hanabi implying she is also a sleeper agent and she knew Keiko from before her deep cover mission? Or does she equate Keiko to Jashin in terms of bloodthirst and pure evil?
Then again, she refers to Jashin as "Him" so surely not?
Sage damn it! She was talking about Keiko.
Not that it matters at this point but damn you, woman. This is Hazou's Quest thread not yours. Take your plans of disturbing the world order and your agency to your own thread. Someone should really report her since I am pretty sure it is frowned upon interfering with other people's quests.
Yes, I wonder what she might be doing. Probably sitting in her room, smiling and thinking happy thoughts and not painstakingly planning everyone's deaths.
She knows.
Shiori knows about the Sunset Racer. Maybe having Keiko kill her before we try to stop her would be acceptable after all?
Kurenai seems like such a good person. Maybe in an alternate universe where Kurenai was Keiko's sensei she could have helped her channel her powers for good. But alas, it was not meant to be.
You and everybody else. Is the date supposed to be a distraction for whatever Keiko is planning? Anyone got any ideas?
You, uh, typo'd. I think.
The word you are looking for is "persuade(someone)todosomethingbymeansofdeceptionorflattery".
I knew it! I predicted that the Hyuuga used their Byakugan primarily to peep on other people. Is it considered conceited to quote yourself in the same post you predicted this in? Then again, what do I care, the quest is ending soon anyway.
So here is me, doing it:
Tua - Master of Prediction and Humility said:
These were simpler, happier times...
Oh crap. If we die before the update ends there really won't be any chance to turn this wreck around. Maybe there is still time:
[X] Action Plan: Kill Keiko
Goals
- Kill Keiko.
- I am not joking.
- This is a real 'X' in there.
- Stab her when she isn't looking.
- Distract her with physical affection if we have to.
- Stab her again to be sure. She might be an Edo Tensei construct.
Celebration Time
- Bake cookies and eat them.
- We just saved the world and we deserve it.
- Forcefully take over the "Hana" avatar should Hazou perish and run as far as we can back to Mist to plot our revenge.
- Practice saying "Hello. My name is Kurosawa Hana. You killed my son. Prepare to die." for the inevitable showdown.
On the other hand, an orgy sounds fun, too.
[O] Orgy Plan: Kill Boredom with an Orgy
Orgy
- Orgy.
- Orgy.
- Orgy.
- Orgy.
- Orgy.
- Orgy.
Orgy Time
- Orgy?
- Orgy.
- Cookies.
- Orgy.
Well, that was a lot to process.
My overall chapter rating.
Happy at first, then the realization that we have to kill Keiko hit me. The orgy was nice, though.
I hope there aren't too many typos left in here but this post took me waaaaaaaaaaay to long to make as it is.
Last edited:
TaliesinSkye
Occasional Editor
- Location
- Northeast Ohio, United States
It showed. XD
Also, Hanabi is adorably terrifying. She should show up again.
- Location
- Milky Way
Damn!
This is hilarious!
edit: If the funny reaction was like the Kagome reaction I would try my best to get it to the point of an integer overflow.
Last edited:
- Location
- Europe
Future Team Hazo genin candidate!
So, killing intent is something detectable in the MfD-verse.
We need to learn that jutsu.
- Location
- uk
Vecht
Self-Requested Ban
- Location
- Snarksville, Snarkland
This should have greater specificity imo. Who specifically do we prioritize (first round combatants, biggest threats)? What information do we expect to gather? How do we approach this?
This should be cut, it's not going to lead anywhere good.
I actually disagree. I think getting the social butterfly on our side is one of the best avenues open to us to do damage control.
- Location
- Liverpool
[X] Action Plan: A Week to Do Things v2.0
- Location
- UK
- Pronouns
- He/Him
He's a case of his own, I think. His social stats and characterisation are both shaped by the players, but in different ways. Hence why, when he lies, people tend to believe him (though his skill is still sub-chūnin), but at the same time he is a youth of openness and moral principle (ignoring all the compromises) who fails at knowing when to do it.
Hazō, who knows nothing about the Hokage's peeping skills, is unlikely to consider them to be competition for the Byakugan. Hiashi would just sneer at the puny mortal trying to imitate even a fraction of the Hyūga's glory.
Tobikomi actually means "jump into", as per Tobikomi Jibura's catchphrase (which I sadly neglected to reference in this update) of selling at a mutually satisfactory price "or he'd jump into a chakra beast's maw himself".
Broken quote there.
[confused]
That was wonderful. I love detailed reaction posts, even if they sometimes reveal plot secrets that weren't meant to come to the players' overall attention.