Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest
- Thread starter eaglejarl
- Start date
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- Tags
- naruto rationalist romance armageddon is looking better and better damn you kishimoto explosions everywhere explosives solve everyone if in doubt surrender to the mercy of zabuza it seemed like a good idea at the time looks like a really bad case of being a jōnin my god. where does the lore end? precommitting is the winning plan screaming in kagome screw the rules i have explosives something bad might still happen sometimes you gotta sociopath stabby zabby subsection c of paragraph 9 should include we can weaponize this so hard open voting
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
- Location
- UK
Hmm, seems safer to vote for [X] Action Plan: Boom, check and run.
I don't think it will be appropriate for Noburi to touch her.
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
I think you mean genjutsu, not henge.
Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
So we should punch the kid in the face to see if the henge dispels, I think.
But wait, we recently learned the value of thinking things through so we should consider the possible fall out, then punch her again just to be sure. It could be a particularly resilient henge. (If the henge fails to break, it's merely another hint for the henge being special. Don't be fooled!)
I mean, what's the worst that can happen when assaulting loyal Leaf nin? A short stay in the Kill Box Inn - which is nice, considering it gives us a chance to sleep under a proper roof for a while?
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Y'all realize that was metaphor, right? Hazō is feeling old and world-weary compared to this chirpy little thing and his internal monologue grows more dismissive over time.
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
I don't think an academy student complaining that Noburi poked her in the face or shook her hand is too much of a political cost to us in this matter. In fact, we're foreigners. Maybe shaking hands is what we do. Us doing so first would even be a good way to signal Noburi what we want without saying anything out loud. And if the messenger is not just a Leaf kid but actually someone under henge or otherwise more powerful and experienced than she seems and thus capable of causing us problems for getting touchy feely with her then we have the legitimate excuse of actually being right to check.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Oh. Well, you can't blame us. There's a bloodline that lets one remove one's eyes, much less one that keys age to altitude
- Location
- Europa, Jupiter Orbit
So how old does she actually look? <11? Our age? Akane+?
I really do think that she is an academy student or recent graduate. The thread is getting alarmed over it because they don't expect a genin to do Important Work like being a skywalking courier.
Instead, we should consult with Best Girlfriend and Noburi before doing anything stupid.
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Skeleton of a plan.
[] Action Plan: Don't Do Anything Stupid.
1. Survive.
2. Don't kill anyone.
[] Action Plan: Don't Do Anything Stupid.
1. Survive.
2. Don't kill anyone.
- Listen to the briefing.
- Talk to Noburi and Akane. Verify the orders.
- Ask cute Murder-girl what's going on down there.
- Get news about what happening. Explain to her that you hadn't been there a while.
- "What do you mean by not letting us up high?"
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Things to note: Do not breach opsec. We were given the skywalkers to go on a mission, we have no idea how they came about.
(It's also worth noting that our opsec breach with Minami is probably not as bad as we think it is -- Jiraiya would not send someone with us, I suspect, that he did not trust implicitly.)
(It's also worth noting that our opsec breach with Minami is probably not as bad as we think it is -- Jiraiya would not send someone with us, I suspect, that he did not trust implicitly.)
Tua
鸡肉面条汤
- Location
- شوربة الدجاج المعكرونة
Of course you'd say that and the next thing we know is that said person of inderterminate age is rolling 200d100 attack rolls because we were stupid enough to let her get close without dispelling the
Okay, serious talk for now:
We don't know this, though. All we know is that this kid - who may or may not be a genin or Mari or someone else entirely - has at least one Skywalker seal. We can't extrapolate from there that other Genins (if she is one) also have them.
I could be wrong but we may be trying to be too clever for little gain here. Lets walk this through:
- In the case of this being Mari, failure to dispel her henge would have which dire consequences? One set of ruffled hairs, two sets of bruised egos and one set of bruised ribs from Akane's bearhug. Either way, nothing we can't afford to lose.
- If she not under Henge, we potentially just punched an allied ninja and barring Noburi being really good at explaining that away ("Riff is a slur in the Mist village and didn't you know that, coming here to pick a fight?") but good luck with that. Chances are, it won't have super bad consequences like Kill Box 2.0 - Raiton Boogaloo since ninjas might understand the whole "henge paranoia" argument, but it won't help our standing either. We don't want Team Uplift to become known as Team Innocent-Girl-Face-Puncher either.
- She is under henge but not Mari. Assuming said person is not friendly, we now have to face someone skilled enough that a) somehow managed to steal the identification codes and b) is within easy melee range of our team. At this point, we'd be better off pretending we didn't notice anything and let said person leave for now. (If the person is friendly, we might get a mild lecture about awareness but nothing too bad, I think.)
tl;dr
The risk to reward ratio is slanted too much in the favor of risk for little gain so while I think we should dispel (it's just best practices to do regularly anyway), we should hold off on punching little girls in the face until we can justify doing so.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
Sounds reasonable enough.
- Location
- Australia
Okay so 3 possibilities
1) Mari
Requires Mari to be assigned the mission. (likely, the less unknown people who meet us the less political trouble Jiraiya has to deal with.)
Requires to be a troll on official ninja business (Not that unlikely)
2) Recent graduate
Requires the village to give skywalkers to a genin (very unlikely)
Requires leaf slang to be weird (riffs, shattered) (a bit unlikely)
3) Hostile ninja pretending to be recent graduate.
Requires gate guards to be comprised or messenger to be comprised in order to get pass-code (Depends on leafs operational security. I think there was something a while back about gate guard being mandatory on a rotation to prevent this but I may be misremembering)
Requires operative to be incompetent or toying with us (Unlikely. You don't toy with Ninja that have our reputation & root doesn't have fun)
Requires operative to have an effective plan to render our testimony irrelevant (Depends how likely she is to kill us & how likely we can effectively silenced by a smear campaign based around killing her)
Requires motive.
1) Mari
Requires Mari to be assigned the mission. (likely, the less unknown people who meet us the less political trouble Jiraiya has to deal with.)
Requires to be a troll on official ninja business (Not that unlikely)
2) Recent graduate
Requires the village to give skywalkers to a genin (very unlikely)
Requires leaf slang to be weird (riffs, shattered) (a bit unlikely)
3) Hostile ninja pretending to be recent graduate.
Requires gate guards to be comprised or messenger to be comprised in order to get pass-code (Depends on leafs operational security. I think there was something a while back about gate guard being mandatory on a rotation to prevent this but I may be misremembering)
Requires operative to be incompetent or toying with us (Unlikely. You don't toy with Ninja that have our reputation & root doesn't have fun)
Requires operative to have an effective plan to render our testimony irrelevant (Depends how likely she is to kill us & how likely we can effectively silenced by a smear campaign based around killing her)
Requires motive.
This is very frustrating to me.
Keep in mind that we haven't been in the village in a while. We don't know what is going on inside Leaf.
What we DO know:
1) Leaf ninja are mobilizing much of their resources trying to find Naruto.
2) The geopolitical situation is unstable. WW4 could start. We done nothing but deliver messages and execute a kidnapping mission.
THEREFORE, it isn't necessary abnormal for a genin to use skywalker. If WW4 is imminent, then it is to Leaf's advantage to teach everyone they could on how to use skywalkers.
In other words, we lacked context. It is probably most likely a genin. She mentioned going to one other skytower, or not being allowed to go very high up.
Adhesion skill is probably most likely a genin level skill, so it shouldn't be unusual.
- Location
- Somewhere over the rainbow
Something to note: With the advent of widespread sky walker seals, tree walking and walking on water is likely going to disappear as a taught skill, simply because whatever you can do with tree walking or water walking you can do better with skywalkers.
Unlikely, since you need chakra adhesion to activate skywalkers, so tree walking would be the obvious preliminary training method for that. Also, most ninja won't have skywalkers in the same numbers since they can't just produce them at will.
- Location
- USA
- Pronouns
- He/Him
A little younger than you. She's either a very fresh genin or maybe a late-stage Academy student.
Something to keep in mind: We are getting paranoid because we saw something unusual to us that can't immediately be explained away, not necessarily because it is a threat.
If they want to kill us or do something else nefarious, they would send someone we would expect, not telegraph out loud.
My bet is NOT on dangerous ninja wanting to kill us, but something is going on inside Leaf. We haven't been there in two weeks.
Therefore, our greatest threat is OUR OWN FEAR.
If they want to kill us or do something else nefarious, they would send someone we would expect, not telegraph out loud.
My bet is NOT on dangerous ninja wanting to kill us, but something is going on inside Leaf. We haven't been there in two weeks.
Therefore, our greatest threat is OUR OWN FEAR.
Cariyaga
Handsome Gentleperson
- Location
- United States
*feedback loop of screams gradually increasing in volume*