Today is Tuesday, September 6, 2022 - the first day of the rest of history! Today is the day when you begin planning actual research into mutagenic inducement methodologies, and there's no research institution, law enforcement agency or shadowy government cabal that'll stop you!
To those around the world, both near and far, today is no more than a typical Tuesday - but wasn't that how the most momentous days in history often went? Were the streets of Philadelphia filled with festivities upon the adoption of the Declaration of Independence? Did panic grip the streets of Petrograd on the day of Lenin's October Revolution? Did millions flock in to see ENIAC? Did anyone so much as bat an eye when the internet first became of use to the general public?
Yes, the stuffy cronies of consensus science may have mocked you and ridiculed you throughout your tutelage at the university, but deep within your heart - and more importantly, your mind - you are utterly convinced of your infallible theories in all of their maddening detail.
But of course, before you can begin your great leap forward in genetic and mutagenic research, you must first look back on your past. Even Einstein had an origin story, and you are by no means any different:
[] Educational Background:
-[] Princeton
These days they say Florida and Ohio are the two craziest US states, but has anyone given much thought to New Jersey? Well, you've lived there all your life, and you can say for a fact that some of the things people do in this state are right up there with the craziest escapades of Florida Man.
The antics of others aside, your admittance to one of the highly respected Ivy League colleges was even by your own admission a freak accident. In all your four troublesome years of study, you never made any long-term friends or connections, you often had heated confrontations with campus police over your bad habit of smoking marijuana, and any involvement you had with any research project was put to an abrupt end when you began pushing your ideas on colleagues almost to the point of ad nauseam. Now you are poverty-stricken and bordering on homeless, often skipping meals just so you can jot down more theories in your notebook. This will all change soon, however - you just know it...
-[] Oxford
It has been said that a university bearing the name of the English city of Oxford has been around in some form for over nine hundred years. Your birth into an upper-class family and subsequent education at a series of excellent academies almost guaranteed you a spot in either Cambridge or Oxford. Of course, given your tendency to go on nigh-incoherent rants during lectures and your complete lack of social skills it wasn't long before you caught the particular ire of a dean who recommended your expulsion. Moving back to a rundown flat in East London was by no means a good decision on your part, but your new knowledge (but by no means connections) with the criminal underworld may prove useful in a number of things, most particularly the procurement of new test subjects.
-[] Prague
Though your childhood home was and always will be the wonderful city of Hamburg, for the past three years you have studied abroad at the former Charles University in Prague, one of the most prestigious institutions of higher education in all the world. Upon your expulsion from there six months ago you moved to Vienna, where you took a degrading blue-collar construction job in order to make ends meet. Now that you've saved enough money to start going around and look for investors, you are confident enough to begin preparations for experimentation.
-[] Amsterdam
It's quite strange. For centuries the Dutch have been viewed as an afterthought among the nations of Europe, always getting invaded by one major power or another. How long has it been since geniuses like Huygens and van Leeuwenhoek brought enlightenment and scientific discoveries to the collective consciousness of mankind? How long has it been since Dutch merchantmen prowled the seven seas, trading guns for spices and building trade posts across the globe? How long has it been since incredible painters like Rembrandt, Bosch and van Gogh awed millions with their incredible paintings Who will take the lead and bring this troubled land to its rescue?
You. You will bring glory to your nation like it has never seen before, bringing it prosperity and advantage unparalleled throughout history. You will usher in a new page in the long story of mankind, one dominated by the true masters of the planet Earth: the Dutch!
Besides, shouldn't there be more Dutch mad scientists in today's world?
- - -
Mutagenics is a broad and diverse field (or at least, it will be once you've created it). The human body is so... malleable, a blank template which can be shaped and molded to fit almost any task or desire. If you are to begin research into mutagenic inducement methodologies, then it would be wise for you to start off with a particular focus into a certain class of potential forms and work from there. Note the considerable overlap between each of the four options below; this is by design.
[] Starting Field of Research:
-[] Humanoid
Why attempt to give humans non-human features when humans by themselves are already so diverse? Perhaps by applying transformations on a mass scale, you could rid the world of racism and sexism! Of course, if the limitations of human forms don't tickle your fantasy, then you could go out and create forms based straight out of Tolkienesque fantasy - elves, dwarves, halflings, you name it...
-[] Therian
Furries. Kemonomimi. Anthros. Whatever the name, these forms are patterned off of fictional depictions of various animals, primarily mammals, given a great number of human characteristics and personality traits. There are people who would pay thousands for a chance to become what the fantasize about being, and there's little doubt in your mind that you wouldn't take such an opportunity lying down.
-[] Monstrous
The word "monster" has always invoked images of terrifying and ravenous creatures. In more recent times, some people might think of attractive women with bizarre inhuman features - but the core concept remains. Zombies, vampires, werewolves, lamias - no form lies out of your reach.
The physical characteristics of these monsters can easily surpass those of even the most powerful humans, making them ideal for military operations. Perhaps you could go further, and build an army of mutant superman capable of conquering the world in your name? The possibilities are endless...
-[] Aesthetic
This one is a bit more abstract. One of your more outlandish theories (which given the rest, is saying something) posits that by manipulating the core quantum fields of subatomic particles one would be able to manipulate. You haven't quite been able to pick a good name for this property yet, but the closest equivalent you can think of would be "art style". With this knowledge in mind, you could develop technology that could transform people into literal anime characters, rubber hose cartoon characters, or PS1-style CGI characters.
- - -
And here we have what I consider to be one of the most batshit insane quest on Sufficient Velocity. Name me one that's crazier.
I dare you. Real-world politics and political figures (or at least, a pastiche of them) may come up in this quest, but given its nature it'll likely just not be relevant at all.
To be honest, I'm not even sure if stuff like this is allowed. At most this quest will delve into ecchi levels of weirdness, but like I said if the mods don't want that sort of stuff then I won't get into it. Body horror will definitely be a thing, too.
But with that said, I hope you enjoy this quest. If I messed anything up in terms of writing and grammar please tell me, because I wrote this post up in a flurry of late night sleep deprivation over the course of about an hour.
