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DoofQuest- a Disney Villains Victorious CK2-Style Quest

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Oh no, my expectations for Janna have made her anxious! This is the opposite of what I wanted!

Or something, hope Janna doesn't take this whole mishap too personally, assuming things don't turn out to bad she probably won't face much punishment, and it'd probably be the community service kind that ends up being training or whatever, so it's not that bad.

Wonder if we can keep the Hellfife? It'd be a consolation prize if we can't take the Manual back anyways.
 
Made in Heaven said:
"Ahhhh, Janus! Come come come! Is wonderful to be seeing you!" Jumba said, as if the two had not last spoken at breakfast that morning.

"Is it finished? It's been so long since the last time you made one, I've forgotten how quickly you work!" Janus Lee had a foreign expression of excitement on his face, something most of his coworkers had never before seen.
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And people say Janus needs more friends. HE has all the friends he needs right here!

Also, 103-E is absolutely perfect and I wish for them to have a long and fulfilling lfife.
 
I wonder if the fact that Malf accidentally accelerating the summoning of Celena will explain how his crit fail meshed with her crit success?
Made in Heaven said:
Despite barely looking humanoid, Celena's ghostly form still managed to cringe despite the low-rent haunting she'd been summoned through. "Well, this shouldn't get in the way of binding me, but… I'm not sure if there's that much I can do. Binding me to the building like we planned will keep me from going anywhere else, and even then, ghosts are usually a bit… out of it when they first etherealize."
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Upside, we get Celena as a proper hero unit that can do things, perhaps even more powerful than she otherwise would have beem, or have other advantages like being able to be assigned to Quests because someone can carry her rock or whatever.

Downside, Celena is summoned with an excess amount of power, and she's high off her gourd for a turn or three? Malf is also upset.
 
Also, no one say Puck's name around 103-E.

That is a low-hanging fruit that I do not want to teach it to reach for.

Made in Heaven said:
"U-u-uh, most of the witches are at the FCLORP. Right outside."

"What?" Winnifred asked.

"Something about his… doglike face."

"Perhaps we made him that way." Sarah suggested dreamily.
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I mean, I am not sure we've ever formally learned who Max' mother is, so technically there is a possibility one of them did make him that way.

See Max, if you were more adventurous about your Toon nature, you could've utilized this!
 
Omegahugger said:
Also, no one say Puck's name around 103-E.

That is a low-hanging fruit that I do not want to teach it to reach for.


I mean, I am not sure we've ever formally learned who Max' mother is, so technically there is a possibility one of them did make him that way.

See Max, if you were more adventurous about your Toon nature, you could've utilized this!
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Luckily, this quest being *relatively* kid-friendly forbids such Freudian slips - let´s be happy we aren´t on QQ, folks

Imean according to some guy working on WFRR, Max is the product of a fling between Goofy and Jessica Rabbit, so....
 
103-E is great, i love them alreddy. so much petty villainy to be had with it and great at fucking up wizards.

i am sure Doof qill be happy with him aswell.
 
Made in Heaven said:
Janus nearly concealed a chuckle, remembered he was among peers, and decided to indulge himself. "Very good doctor."
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Of all our heroes Janus is probably the most delighted with his working conditions.

or perhaps a leaping squirrel.
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Spoken like a narrator who has never had a squirrel leap at them. Underestimate the most agile arboreal creature on earth at your peril.

"Oh," Mary said, "They walked out the door a moment ago." She attempted a winning, gormless smile, one whose ultimate goal was to assure the target you were far too stupid to be blamed for whatever had just happened. "Should I have mentioned that?"
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Woman knows her role.

"Sorry Janna." He grimaced. "But we need some backup."
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Tom shows maturity beyond his teenage aesthetic.

Why did that suddenly matter?
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Because maturity.

50cc of mouse blood
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If it is good enough for DEATH himself then it is good enough for a ghost queen.

On the astral plane, it slammed open as a tidal wave of raw magic coursed over the room. Celena put her hands up, controlling the flow almost instinctively by funneling it, twisting it, channeling it down-

Tom gazed in shock at the now crystal clear image of Celena the Shy, something-th Queen of Mewni, and the visibly glowing orb of magic power floating in her hand.
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Gentlebeings I present to you a practitioner who actually knows what they are doing. At long last.
 
Made in Heaven said:
A few floors further down, the elevator came to a stop. The doors opened and two odd men stepped inside, a blond with heterochromia and a four-eyed monstrosity in a white coat. Some sort of odd bird was perched on his shoulder.

All six inhabitants stared at each other.

A few moments passed as the elevator resumed its slow descent. As the sign turned to single digits, Sarah opened her mouth to say something, only to be met with a quick slap from Winnifred. The blond man opened his mouth, only for the monstrosity to nudge him in the ribs in turn.
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Picturing this scene was hilarious and made me laugh to the point of coughing. Just the absurdity of the shear awkward mundanity a bunch of weirdos finding themselves in.
 
Oooooo, update! Reaction time!
Made in Heaven said:
Jumba returned immediately to his boasting. "Experiment 103-E can flawlessly change any singular phoneme in target's speech retroactively, as if never occurring! Nearly undetectable effect and benign appearance-"

The bird scratched its enormous cone-shaped growth.

"Is based in exotic planes of reality, incorporating limited research from Experiment 610." Jumba described the integration of magic into his work in the same way most people described a new type of screw. "Imagine the chaos he will be capable of! 103-E can cause politicians to commit gaffes live on campaign trail, closed captioning writers will continually get inexplicably obvious things wrong, and best of all, scientific rivals will be tricked into referring to incorrect nucleotide pairs at academic conferences! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
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...FUCK!!!

Well, this could be a good thing. It might make the Sandersons mix up their own spells.
Made in Heaven said:
"What were you thinking starting with a spell that strong?!" Feldrake snapped, his eyes glowing violet. "We both know there's no way you'll be able to cast that again! If you're in a duel, you start out with something like Plasma Bolt! Sure it's not as flashy, but it doesn't take as much out of you!"
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Janna, now is not the time to overcompensate for your insecurities!
Made in Heaven said:
Setting up a massive FCLORP across the city had to be one of their best ideas ever! The turnout to this thing was massive, Phineas had expected maybe ten or twelve nerds other than his friends to show up, but they were numbering in the hundreds! Luckily the flash-fabricated safety swords and shields made sure everyone could fill a role, and some flashy lights and special effects filled in for the magic.
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Well... at least we won't have to worry about the Masquerade.
Made in Heaven said:
A few floors further down, the elevator came to a stop. The doors opened and two odd men stepped inside, a blond with heterochromia and a four-eyed monstrosity in a white coat. Some sort of odd bird was perched on his shoulder.

All six inhabitants stared at each other.

A few moments passed as the elevator resumed its slow descent. As the sign turned to single digits, Sarah opened her mouth to say something, only to be met with a quick slap from Winnifred. The blond man opened his mouth, only for the monstrosity to nudge him in the ribs in turn.
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This is either going to be really stupid or extremely funny, there's no in-between.
Made in Heaven said:
Janna skidded into the lobby after leaping off the stairwell, leaving a long thin mark that would drive Mr. Moseby insane later that day. With a running vault she flipped over the concierge desk, landing next to Max who didn't even look up from his paper.

"Hi Janna."

"Hey Max."
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Oh hey, Max! He finally starts helping again!
Made in Heaven said:
Janna immediately flipped open her phone. "Thank you cool whatever oh heeeeeey Marco! How you doing?"

"Janna, I can't talk right now." Marco's voice rose out of the high-end Doofphone.

"Liiiisten." Janna replied as Tom joined her crouching under the desk. "It's kinda important…"

"I think I've found someone who saw Star."

Janna grimaced. "Look that's really cool but-"

"Yesterday." Marco hissed.

Janna pulled up short, dumbfounded. "I-"

"I have to go." Marco said firmly. "You have a whole building full of weirdos. Whatever it is, make use of them."

Marco hung up.
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...crud. Well, at least the Hunt for Star is progressing.
Made in Heaven said:
"So today, servants, I am going to be teaching you a spell near and dear to my heart. A spell capable of shutting up even the most annoying peasant screams. Behold!"

With a burst of not-sound, every noise in the room was replaced with a gentle buzzing. "Ahhhh, Silence. Is there a better spell for dealing with peons?" Malf asked, strolling leisurely across the room. "Except Doom Finger I mean, but for some reason that's not allowed nowadays. Because of these things called labor laws. And federal laws. And morality. Morality! Can you believe it? Back in my day we had immorality, and we liked it. They say if I do anything I'll get the Feds on us. I don't know what a feds is but I don't want one on me, it sounds like a rash, so I'll just hit them with the non-lethal spells for now. Hmm. Turning them into cows isn't lethal, maybe I could get away with that!" Malf rambled to himself as he hovered between the thankless, silenced interns. Looking past them he saw the infuriating noise device on his desk silently blinking a bright red light at him. "Wait, what, is that thing blinking at me again? Stupid thing, stop blinking!" Malf snapped, picking up the silently ringing phone and staring back at it. "Stop that! I can blink too, you're not special!"

He blinked each eye, one at a time, at the phone for a few seconds. The phone continued blinking back. "Oh yeah?! W-well you know what else I can do?"

The window shattered silently as the phone plunged thirty stories to its demise in the parking lot below. "Whaddya think of that, huh?"

The phone notably did not say anything.

"Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, Silence! Pretty neat, huh?" Malf asked expectantly.
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DAMMIT MALF!!!!!!!!!!!
Made in Heaven said:
"A little? The only reason you didn't kill yourself from overcasting is because he was topping you off every other spell!" Feldrake snapped.

"But that doesn't matter!" Janna replied forcefully. "I'm the only one here, and I'm stronger than I was before anyway, so I'll handle this."

"How?!" Tom replied.

"I'll think of something." Janna said firmly.

Tom pursed his lips. "Okay, how about you think of this: We were about to have someone else here. The ritual circle for Celena is still set up! Let's just sneak back up there, call her out, and we can get her to solve this."

"No, there's no time." Janna replied. "The Sandersons always try to eat babies or whatever."

"I'm not hearing a better idea." Tom said. "Celena is definitely stronger than us."

"We can't have her first day be crisis mode!" Janna hissed. "Especially when It's my fault. I'm not going to get chewed out for this mess. I'm here, I caused it, I'll fix it."
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Yikes. What's going on with Janna? It's like she's suddenly decided she's worth nothing and now needs to prove otherwise!
Made in Heaven said:
Don't sigh. Don't sigh or you're dead.

Even the tiniest implication that the trouble was over would immediately bring it back. Max bundled up every ounce of relief he felt and shoved it away as if he'd never been worried at all. Unhealthy in the long term, but shockingly healthy in the moment.
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Careful. It's learning.
Made in Heaven said:
But it was too late. Sarah had already leaned down and picked up a three-fold spread advertising Lard World from the wooden shelf. A moment later the floor gently unfolded beneath them, dropping the three witches with a shriek into…

"This is much worse than the brochure!" Sarah wailed as she fell into two feet of lard.

"Of all the intractable- Nnngh!" Winnifred snarled, flames bursting into being and physically burning the fat away. Snarling and slightly matted, the three witches crawled in a most undignified manner out of the pit.

Without even saying a word, Winnifred stalked out of the lobby, leaving a growing trail of fire behind her.
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And this is why we booby-trap literally everything. More reason to trap our HQ.
Made in Heaven said:
Mr Moesby ran into the lobby as quickly as possible. "I heard the Lardinator go off- did we get them at las…!"

Moesby's excitement trailed off as he saw the three women walking away. "Who are they?"

"They're here for the FCLORP." Max deadpanned. "No ninjas today. Sorry boss."

"Drat." Moesby replied. "We'll get those hooligans yet Max. There will be no more fires in my lobby."

Moesby looked over said lobby for the first time.

"THERE'S FIRE IN MY LOBBY!!!" He screamed.

Max pushed the sprinkler button, and flame retardant foam quickly covered the center of the room.

"Oh, today is off to a wonderful start, isn't it?" Moesby bemoaned, sitting down on a futon. There was an unpleasant squish as something that may or may not have been placed there by a witch horribly stained his trousers. He groaned.

As soon as the coast was clear, Janna and Tom popped up from underneath Max.

"...do I want to know why you were under there?" Moesby asked.

"We're teenagers, so no." Max said without hesitation.

"Ahn." Moesby murmured, turning his head in an expression of abject misery.
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Sorry, Moseby. And I don't think your day is over yet.
Made in Heaven said:
High up in the towers of DEI, a dam cracked. It was not a physical dam, but a metaphysical one. For hours, arcane energy drawn from the heart of the Earth itself had gathered, filling and stagnating in the bend that Malifishmertz had so carelessly created. Now it was swollen, glutted with undirected magic. And in mere seconds… it broke loose. An invisible flood poured forth, crashing through DEI and destroying the magical equivalent of the coven intern's desk toys with mystic power that went completely unremarked by almost everyone in the building. The exception was Malf, who was interrupted thirty minutes into his silent lecture when a tidal wave his students couldn't see swept him out of the building.

Magic poured down DEI like wet treacle, strands of magic oozing downwards as they sought a power sink, a leyline, anything strong enough to contain the wayward power.

It fsound one.
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FUCKING DAMMIT MALF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Made in Heaven said:
Winnifred smiled, flipping through the book. "From blackened spires of deadened sites, from demons cruel in darkened rites, master of killers, thieves and liars, summon forth your black hellfirfe!"

A little bird tweeted.

Jumba, who had up to now been working his way through the throng of geekery with the slow determination of the five foot wide man, turned and gaped as multicolored lights swirled in the eyes of his creation.

Winnifred's face screwed up in confusion as a swirling black portal edged with flame came into being. All the powers of hell conferred to deposit in her outstretched hand a pitch black… woodwind instrument.

The fife was dark as night, etched with skulls and seeming to absorb the light around it.

It was also a fife.
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...keep that bird near the Sandersons, this is perfect (so long as Janna stays away from it).
Made in Heaven said:
"It's a little weird, but I can dig it." the kid admitted. The rest of the crowd started to applaud enthusiastically.

"But it didn't rhyme!" One man complained, but he was ignored.

"You have demonstrated your power and wisdom!" Several of the players declared.

"And your inclusivity to bards!" one noted.

Approximately half the crowd swore loyalty to the witches.

"That's better than we usually do." Mary muttered, sidling up to Winnifred.

"A fair point." Winiffred admitted. "But I am more fascinated by what hath disrupted my-"
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Oh, dammit. Now they have an army.
Made in Heaven said:
"Astonishing!" a voice roared out. "Experiment 103-E is even capable of altering metaphysic idea space on fly while disrupting invocations! What an unexpected success!"

"A way to influence magic…" the blond man intoned, delighted.
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And, they're going to be insufferable about this.
Made in Heaven said:
In the distance, Janna popped out of DEI and took in the scene, getting lost in the crowd. She grimaced when she saw Jumba and Janus, major DEI figures, already interacting with the Sandersons. Nooo. Oh, the big wigs were never going to take her seriously if they had to clean this up for her.

Why did that suddenly matter?
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I'm with Janna, when did she suddenly start caring about people cleaning up her messes? I think both she AND Russ need some therapy.

EDIT: Ah, yes, the maturity arc. Definitely keep that, but not to the degree that you're charging headfirst into danger because you want to prove you're responsible and/or worth something.
Made in Heaven said:
"Let sit for… 2-3 weeks?!" Tom blanched.
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BLAST IT ALL!!!!!!!
Made in Heaven said:
A small, weak haze rose up from the petals. At first Tom was worried nothing was going to happen, but then a thin, hazy form slowly stabilized.

"...did you… um… by any chance skimp out on the three weeks?" Celena said, voice sounding even smaller and further away than usual, like one good embarrassment would completely discorporate her.
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...perfect. Maybe the torrential downpour can fix this?
Made in Heaven said:
Tobe and his Vagabond Ninja watched carefully as Hernae slowly lowered a single slice of pineapple down onto a sweet-potato upside-down potion.

"Oooh."

"Aaah."
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DAMMIT, TOBE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Made in Heaven said:
The ghostly smudge put her hands together. "Well, I, um. I suppose it's also possible to bind a ghost to a specific object instead. But, that would require far more energy than we've set aside. The sort that would take an entire leyline hours to build up. I'm… afraid that kind of power doesn't just fall out of the sky."

In the mundane world, the door creaked slightly.

On the astral plane, it slammed open as a tidal wave of raw magic coursed over the room. Celena put her hands up, controlling the flow almost instinctively by funneling it, twisting it, channeling it down-

Tom gazed in shock at the now crystal clear image of Celena the Shy, something-th Queen of Mewni, and the visibly glowing orb of magic power floating in her hand.

"Does… this sort of thing happen often?" She asked weakly.

"It's Danville." Tom replied.
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....okay. Not thanking Malf for this, but I can definitely appreciate it. Let's just hope this is enough to do away with the Sanderson Sisters (though that bird is still making me nervous).
 
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Poor Janna..

When P&F fuck up, they end up saving the Masquerade, when Jumba fucks up he ends up stopping the Sandersons from frying people, when Malf fucks up he ends up empowering Celena's binding...

When Janna fucks up there has been no silver lining.
 
Malifinschmirtz, foulest of villains and #3 family related employee of Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated, I am ashamed of you, and you should be ashamed of yourself. You did good. Turn in your badge, your weapon, your 6.675.56 liters of unicorn blood, and your coffee mug. You're through!
 
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