The world of Malus stands on the brink of destruction. With every passing year do the races of order grow weaker, with every year chaos grows stronger. The end times are inevitable.... are they? A foreign God sees the sorrow this universe is in and decides to send a champion to help.
Deliver us from Evil An alexander anderson on Malus story, Warhammer fantasy/Helsing Abridged + quest
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Prologue Part 1
- Pronouns
- He
Prologue Part 1
The multiverse was big. Really big. As in unimaginably, inconceivably, infinitely, utterly beyond mortal comprehension BIG. The highest functioning mortals could only scratch the surface of what the multiverse even was, let alone what it could entail. Each and every possibility, each step, all paths which could exist, was out there.
Time had no meaning for God, but on this day he was perusing a branch of the multiverse. Without a major crisis like a universal entity getting omnicidal or some part of reality cracking, he could spare a bit of attention to some smaller universes, see what could be done.
"Hmm, what's this?" One universe caught his eye, peering into its existence. "Oh, how did this one pass inspection? Oh, that one is not good."
It was a smaller universe, all things considered. Still it was inhabited by various people of different races, living their lives and choices according to their free will, for good and ill.
It had a little weaker rules than the baseline, so while it was recognizable to 'normal' verses the people from it came out as 'grander' than others, more capable of extraordinary things. Which wasn't unusual, those two superclusters of universes did a tone of weird stuff like breaking time or collapsing reality every now and again; he had to appoint a good entity just so he didn't have to babysit them all the time.
This one however, it had something the rest usually didn't. Another universe was mashed into it, entangling itself in the mesh of reality, invading and crossing over. Just by being there this extra universe was destabilizing existence, breaking down its rules in favor of its own. Alone it was possible but unlikely to cause a total event collapse, completely subsuming the universe, but it seemed like it wasn't unguided.
Something was in that slurry of power, directing its prongs for its own goals.
"Hmm, well I gotta… ah how unfortunate." 'Far' away, another universe was having problems. He couldn't spare the effort to fix this one right, especially considering how this Universe had no worshippers of his for whom he could act through. Not to mention that these fell powers had convinced numerous human beings to their side hmmmm…… what could be done here?
"How to do this…" There were no worshippers of his in this Universe, nor was there time to again send a part of himself as his son down there to save them, but there were other champions of his that would be well suited to help them out….. Just who to pick……
[]A boy recovering from a battle with a horrid akuma. An evil that might be redeemed resting in him.
[]A child of suffering, blessed with the power to destroy evil and cursed to misfortune. He had nothing of himself left, not even a name, all he had was strength and faith.
[]A pillar of faith vanquished, created by Man to serve God, sacrificing his salvation and soul to vanquish the greatest evil of his world, meeting death and life with a smile. His faith was beyond reproach, thus he cared little of upsetting nonbelievers.
[] all three of them
[] two of them (write in which two)
The multiverse was big. Really big. As in unimaginably, inconceivably, infinitely, utterly beyond mortal comprehension BIG. The highest functioning mortals could only scratch the surface of what the multiverse even was, let alone what it could entail. Each and every possibility, each step, all paths which could exist, was out there.
Time had no meaning for God, but on this day he was perusing a branch of the multiverse. Without a major crisis like a universal entity getting omnicidal or some part of reality cracking, he could spare a bit of attention to some smaller universes, see what could be done.
"Hmm, what's this?" One universe caught his eye, peering into its existence. "Oh, how did this one pass inspection? Oh, that one is not good."
It was a smaller universe, all things considered. Still it was inhabited by various people of different races, living their lives and choices according to their free will, for good and ill.
It had a little weaker rules than the baseline, so while it was recognizable to 'normal' verses the people from it came out as 'grander' than others, more capable of extraordinary things. Which wasn't unusual, those two superclusters of universes did a tone of weird stuff like breaking time or collapsing reality every now and again; he had to appoint a good entity just so he didn't have to babysit them all the time.
This one however, it had something the rest usually didn't. Another universe was mashed into it, entangling itself in the mesh of reality, invading and crossing over. Just by being there this extra universe was destabilizing existence, breaking down its rules in favor of its own. Alone it was possible but unlikely to cause a total event collapse, completely subsuming the universe, but it seemed like it wasn't unguided.
Something was in that slurry of power, directing its prongs for its own goals.
"Hmm, well I gotta… ah how unfortunate." 'Far' away, another universe was having problems. He couldn't spare the effort to fix this one right, especially considering how this Universe had no worshippers of his for whom he could act through. Not to mention that these fell powers had convinced numerous human beings to their side hmmmm…… what could be done here?
"How to do this…" There were no worshippers of his in this Universe, nor was there time to again send a part of himself as his son down there to save them, but there were other champions of his that would be well suited to help them out….. Just who to pick……
[]A boy recovering from a battle with a horrid akuma. An evil that might be redeemed resting in him.
[]A child of suffering, blessed with the power to destroy evil and cursed to misfortune. He had nothing of himself left, not even a name, all he had was strength and faith.
[]A pillar of faith vanquished, created by Man to serve God, sacrificing his salvation and soul to vanquish the greatest evil of his world, meeting death and life with a smile. His faith was beyond reproach, thus he cared little of upsetting nonbelievers.
[] all three of them
[] two of them (write in which two)
Character vote
- Pronouns
- He
Vote for who is/are the champions God sends to this most holy task
[] Allen Walker (D Gray Man)
[] Alexander Anderson (Helsing Ultimate Abridged)
[] Father (Make the exorcist fall in love)
[] all three of them
[] two of them (write in which two)
[] Allen Walker (D Gray Man)
[] Alexander Anderson (Helsing Ultimate Abridged)
[] Father (Make the exorcist fall in love)
[] all three of them
[] two of them (write in which two)
- Pronouns
- He
Hello you all! Yes, I am posting this quest now also on SV. I am excited in what direction people will take it here! I hope you all have a good time with it and as always, feedback, questions and criticism is very welcome.
For those unaware from the SB version, this quest is basically about the God of Helsing Abridged noticing the plight of Malus and deciding to help out.... namely by tossing one or multiple of his champions from other worlds at warhammer and see if the end result is something better than cannon.
Note here, multiple champions will greatly increase the strenght of the MCs, but their characters and personalities might very well clash!
Either way, have fun!
For those unaware from the SB version, this quest is basically about the God of Helsing Abridged noticing the plight of Malus and deciding to help out.... namely by tossing one or multiple of his champions from other worlds at warhammer and see if the end result is something better than cannon.
Note here, multiple champions will greatly increase the strenght of the MCs, but their characters and personalities might very well clash!
Either way, have fun!
- Pronouns
- He
Thank you!
Imma post some thoughts of the headspace of the people involved, since Allen and Father are rather unknown
[x]A pillar of faith vanquished, created by Man to serve God, sacrificing his salvation and soul to vanquish the greatest evil of his world, meeting death and life with a smile. His faith was beyond reproach, thus he cared little of upsetting nonbelievers.
Allen Walkers Dream
- Pronouns
- He
Allen Walker´s Dream
Allen did not dream. Not really. There was a time where he did dream, as a child. After he had sacrificed his father´s soul to the earl to see him revived. After Mana cursed him for this horrific act that saw him become an Akuma. For how his adoptive father, the one man who had showed him kindness in his life had thanked him as his own claws, moving of their own volition and against his will, tore him apart. How he had begged for him to run away from him.
He had dreamed after his first friend had died, again at his hands. He had not told him what he knew and so the young boy had turned towards the earl in grief about his sisters death.
It had not been nice dreams.
After a while, his dreams had finally ended. They had been replaced with the comfort of eternal empty darkness, deep from within his mind.
So, it took more than a couple seconds for the young man to realize that he was, in fact, dreaming.
The sourrondings he 'woke' up in looked not unlike Noah´s ark. All around him were large buildings and towers, made out of marble, drown out over an impossible vaste distance and yet..... it was not like the ark.
There were people here. They greeted each other, joked, lived in peace and joy. There was an inherent calmness that was utterly alien to the people he knew. To the world he knew.
"Is it truly? Another sin that the earl will have to answer for." A sudden voice appeared on Allen´s head, a warmth feeling his body that he had not known in a long time. Whirling around in reflexes honed by a life that had far to great a portion of it focuses on fighting.
Behind him stood a massive triangle of blue light. It was sourronded by pure, absolute, power that yet was silent, not blazing like an exploding vulcano or toumultous like the wild sea but instead calm and gentle, laying itself around him more like a comforting blanket.
"Hello Allen. I am."
There were many different confessions of christianity, many with different defenitions of heresy, what to do and what not to do. It was remarkably difficult to get them to agree on anything, yet Allen was pretty sure they´d all be pissed by what he did next.
He punched God.
God did not in particular have a face he could shove his fist in, but that did not in particular stop him. He did kind of expect to burn up, maybe he´d fall like Suman the instant he tried but nothing of the sort happened. His fist connecting with the ring of light and pushed it back a bit. It did feel remarkably similar to punching a human.
"That´s for Sum-" He started before a a force grabbed him from behind and just.... lightly shoved him forward, right into God.
He expected pain or the like, but there was nothing of the sort. The force behind him was soft and gentle, embracing him in a matter that felt genuine in a manner no one had done since Mana. He tried to struggle for a moment, for a second, but the hug he found himself in was as unrelenting as it was gentle.
"I know. I know, my Son." The sheer sorrow in God´s voice hit him like a punch, he felt how his own legs began to tremble from hearing it. "I know what you went through. I know what Suman did to himself out of guilt. I know how you and so many have suffered. I was there, with each and everyone of you, feeling what you did." The hug became gentler, even more genuine. "And I am sorry. You deserve the rest of Paradise more than so many. Yet I have to ask of you yet more."
A multitude of different emotions burled up in Allen, but one reigned above all. There was.... sorrow in God´s voice. Sorrow and he could almost feel tears, invisible yet undeniably present, run down his form. So, almost on reflex, Allen did the one thing he always did when confronted with the sorrow of others, be they demon or human. Innocent or Monster. He combated it.
He hugged him back, a fist, clenched in anger spreading in an embrace.
"I thank you, my child." God sounded almost touched, before slowly, his embrace lifted of him, though Allen could still feel his warmth as if he was still there. "I am terrible sad but I must ask yet more of you on top of all you have done so far. There is another world, different from yours, that is deep in the clutches of evil. The people there suffer horribly and if nothing is to be done, the light of hope there will be vanquished at last. I must ask of-"
For the second time in less than five minutes, Allen did something that almost all the churches of the world would consider heretical and something that was terribly rude and as such would normally go at his own standards. He interrupted God. "The people there suffer? Then my choice is already made." He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking for a couple moments about his friends and collegues.
"You will be able to return to them exactly where you left of." There was a pause. "And thank you my child."
Authors note:
Alright, that was a taste of Allen´s perspective. Father is next and after that comes Anderson! To give you all a taste of their respective Povs. Hope you enjoyed it!
Allen did not dream. Not really. There was a time where he did dream, as a child. After he had sacrificed his father´s soul to the earl to see him revived. After Mana cursed him for this horrific act that saw him become an Akuma. For how his adoptive father, the one man who had showed him kindness in his life had thanked him as his own claws, moving of their own volition and against his will, tore him apart. How he had begged for him to run away from him.
He had dreamed after his first friend had died, again at his hands. He had not told him what he knew and so the young boy had turned towards the earl in grief about his sisters death.
It had not been nice dreams.
After a while, his dreams had finally ended. They had been replaced with the comfort of eternal empty darkness, deep from within his mind.
So, it took more than a couple seconds for the young man to realize that he was, in fact, dreaming.
The sourrondings he 'woke' up in looked not unlike Noah´s ark. All around him were large buildings and towers, made out of marble, drown out over an impossible vaste distance and yet..... it was not like the ark.
There were people here. They greeted each other, joked, lived in peace and joy. There was an inherent calmness that was utterly alien to the people he knew. To the world he knew.
"Is it truly? Another sin that the earl will have to answer for." A sudden voice appeared on Allen´s head, a warmth feeling his body that he had not known in a long time. Whirling around in reflexes honed by a life that had far to great a portion of it focuses on fighting.
Behind him stood a massive triangle of blue light. It was sourronded by pure, absolute, power that yet was silent, not blazing like an exploding vulcano or toumultous like the wild sea but instead calm and gentle, laying itself around him more like a comforting blanket.
"Hello Allen. I am."
There were many different confessions of christianity, many with different defenitions of heresy, what to do and what not to do. It was remarkably difficult to get them to agree on anything, yet Allen was pretty sure they´d all be pissed by what he did next.
He punched God.
God did not in particular have a face he could shove his fist in, but that did not in particular stop him. He did kind of expect to burn up, maybe he´d fall like Suman the instant he tried but nothing of the sort happened. His fist connecting with the ring of light and pushed it back a bit. It did feel remarkably similar to punching a human.
"That´s for Sum-" He started before a a force grabbed him from behind and just.... lightly shoved him forward, right into God.
He expected pain or the like, but there was nothing of the sort. The force behind him was soft and gentle, embracing him in a matter that felt genuine in a manner no one had done since Mana. He tried to struggle for a moment, for a second, but the hug he found himself in was as unrelenting as it was gentle.
"I know. I know, my Son." The sheer sorrow in God´s voice hit him like a punch, he felt how his own legs began to tremble from hearing it. "I know what you went through. I know what Suman did to himself out of guilt. I know how you and so many have suffered. I was there, with each and everyone of you, feeling what you did." The hug became gentler, even more genuine. "And I am sorry. You deserve the rest of Paradise more than so many. Yet I have to ask of you yet more."
A multitude of different emotions burled up in Allen, but one reigned above all. There was.... sorrow in God´s voice. Sorrow and he could almost feel tears, invisible yet undeniably present, run down his form. So, almost on reflex, Allen did the one thing he always did when confronted with the sorrow of others, be they demon or human. Innocent or Monster. He combated it.
He hugged him back, a fist, clenched in anger spreading in an embrace.
"I thank you, my child." God sounded almost touched, before slowly, his embrace lifted of him, though Allen could still feel his warmth as if he was still there. "I am terrible sad but I must ask yet more of you on top of all you have done so far. There is another world, different from yours, that is deep in the clutches of evil. The people there suffer horribly and if nothing is to be done, the light of hope there will be vanquished at last. I must ask of-"
For the second time in less than five minutes, Allen did something that almost all the churches of the world would consider heretical and something that was terribly rude and as such would normally go at his own standards. He interrupted God. "The people there suffer? Then my choice is already made." He closed his eyes for a moment, thinking for a couple moments about his friends and collegues.
"You will be able to return to them exactly where you left of." There was a pause. "And thank you my child."
Authors note:
Alright, that was a taste of Allen´s perspective. Father is next and after that comes Anderson! To give you all a taste of their respective Povs. Hope you enjoyed it!
Father's dream
- Pronouns
- He
Father's dream
Father had fallen asleep on his books. Not too rare an occurrence. He had fallen asleep more than a couple times when Abbot Nicholas has him read the Bible and other liturgical texts for a whole week straight!
The good Abbot had whipped him so hard that time that he had skinned most of his back. He had only been six at the time, but that was hardly an excuse now was it? Still had repeated that Sin a couple more time, to the great frustration of the priests who raised him.
Of course, if they were to see what he was reading now they´d probably would be even more incensed than that. Romeo and Juliet, from Shakesphere, great expectations, from Charles Dickens and so many more classic love novels that could find in the church library or that he could convince the acolytes to bring him when they left the convent.
Love, what a fascinating thing.
When he woke up he was not in the church anymore, that much he recognized immediately. All around him was an empty dance floor, or at least seemingly empty. There was a person he could not make up, covered by shadows as she swept across the dance floor, dancing in her lonesome.
At once his senses entered on high alert. A bubble of brilliant light formed around him, ready to deflect any surprise attack while his mind expanded, taking in every slot, every curve, every inch of the space he was in, trying to detect whereever the demons were. It was not the first time one of the lords of hell had chosen to throw him into some dimension to face him there.
There was none. He felt no demons, nor any hostile intent.
That was…. Troubling. He was the strongest exorcist on the planet, God´s weapon, made to defeat Satan. The amount of things that could hide from him where…. Exceedingly small, almost entirely limited to the demon lords.
With a snarl, he called upon the sword of scripture, starting to recite the verse in question, ready to scour any potential attacker away with the wrath of God.
There was only one thing in this ball room he could interact with, so slowly, ready for an attack, he creeped forward to the dancing shadow woman.
Was she a demon? A human cultist of Gehenna? An Illusion within his mind? He had not noticed anyone trying to affect him, but that did not mean that no one had.
From What little he could see, she looked to be 14 or 15, older than him. Her hair, the strands that were visible were brown and he could swear she was smiling at him whenever his eyes met where hers should be.
"Who ar-" He was interrupted with a yelp as she suddenly reached out, her hands piercing through his shield as if it wasn´t even there! She was moving as fast as a normal human, so he could have easily stopped her, but because of some reason, some deep yearning buried deep, deep in his soul, he did not..
He let her grab his hands and sweep him up, taking him into her dance. It…. was just a simple dance, an uncomplicated waltz, that father could follow easily enough. Just….. Why did his heart ache as he danced in this woman´s arms? Why did her hands feel so warm around his? Why did her fingers fit so perfectly to his?
Why did her unseen smile fill him with such warmth that all the teachings of Abbot Nicolas could not replicate?
"That is because that is love. Your love to be exact." A voice behind him stated. Father turned around, his eyes seeing an immense light, right before his forehead crashed into the ground, the wooden floor desintegrating under the force with which he prostrated himself.
"My Lord, I am not worthy of this honour." God was before him, God! Every cell in his body froze as he refused to make any movement, refused to show even an inch of disrespect to his lord and master. Was he dead? Was this heaven? It had to be. But how did he die? A sneak attack by Lucifer perhaps? Poison? For some reason he felt his heart ache even more at the realization that he was dead. Martyrdoom had been his goal for most of his life, to leave this cruel world behind and finally enter heaven.
That had been before Father Dante had told him to find and experience love.
"You yet live, my son." There was a silence between his lords words that disconcerted him. Had he done something to displease him? The penance he would d-
"Do not Mutilate yourself. You have not insulted me, nothing you did has. There are others though...:" For a moment Divine wrath flared up and it outburned all the fires of Gehenna Father had walked so far, the exorcist only remaining standing because it was not directed at him.
"There is another world out there, that is in need of your aid."
"Your command is my will!" Father enthusiastically shouted, though.... was he mistaken? For he did not dare to look up on his Lord´s form, he could have sworn to have felt slight disapproval in that very moment. Though it was gone the next second, before he could even come to terms with it.
"Very well..... thank you my son."
Authors Note:
And that was father´s example pov! Hope it gave you a small look into the character. Next and final one is anderson.
Father had fallen asleep on his books. Not too rare an occurrence. He had fallen asleep more than a couple times when Abbot Nicholas has him read the Bible and other liturgical texts for a whole week straight!
The good Abbot had whipped him so hard that time that he had skinned most of his back. He had only been six at the time, but that was hardly an excuse now was it? Still had repeated that Sin a couple more time, to the great frustration of the priests who raised him.
Of course, if they were to see what he was reading now they´d probably would be even more incensed than that. Romeo and Juliet, from Shakesphere, great expectations, from Charles Dickens and so many more classic love novels that could find in the church library or that he could convince the acolytes to bring him when they left the convent.
Love, what a fascinating thing.
When he woke up he was not in the church anymore, that much he recognized immediately. All around him was an empty dance floor, or at least seemingly empty. There was a person he could not make up, covered by shadows as she swept across the dance floor, dancing in her lonesome.
At once his senses entered on high alert. A bubble of brilliant light formed around him, ready to deflect any surprise attack while his mind expanded, taking in every slot, every curve, every inch of the space he was in, trying to detect whereever the demons were. It was not the first time one of the lords of hell had chosen to throw him into some dimension to face him there.
There was none. He felt no demons, nor any hostile intent.
That was…. Troubling. He was the strongest exorcist on the planet, God´s weapon, made to defeat Satan. The amount of things that could hide from him where…. Exceedingly small, almost entirely limited to the demon lords.
With a snarl, he called upon the sword of scripture, starting to recite the verse in question, ready to scour any potential attacker away with the wrath of God.
There was only one thing in this ball room he could interact with, so slowly, ready for an attack, he creeped forward to the dancing shadow woman.
Was she a demon? A human cultist of Gehenna? An Illusion within his mind? He had not noticed anyone trying to affect him, but that did not mean that no one had.
From What little he could see, she looked to be 14 or 15, older than him. Her hair, the strands that were visible were brown and he could swear she was smiling at him whenever his eyes met where hers should be.
"Who ar-" He was interrupted with a yelp as she suddenly reached out, her hands piercing through his shield as if it wasn´t even there! She was moving as fast as a normal human, so he could have easily stopped her, but because of some reason, some deep yearning buried deep, deep in his soul, he did not..
He let her grab his hands and sweep him up, taking him into her dance. It…. was just a simple dance, an uncomplicated waltz, that father could follow easily enough. Just….. Why did his heart ache as he danced in this woman´s arms? Why did her hands feel so warm around his? Why did her fingers fit so perfectly to his?
Why did her unseen smile fill him with such warmth that all the teachings of Abbot Nicolas could not replicate?
"That is because that is love. Your love to be exact." A voice behind him stated. Father turned around, his eyes seeing an immense light, right before his forehead crashed into the ground, the wooden floor desintegrating under the force with which he prostrated himself.
"My Lord, I am not worthy of this honour." God was before him, God! Every cell in his body froze as he refused to make any movement, refused to show even an inch of disrespect to his lord and master. Was he dead? Was this heaven? It had to be. But how did he die? A sneak attack by Lucifer perhaps? Poison? For some reason he felt his heart ache even more at the realization that he was dead. Martyrdoom had been his goal for most of his life, to leave this cruel world behind and finally enter heaven.
That had been before Father Dante had told him to find and experience love.
"You yet live, my son." There was a silence between his lords words that disconcerted him. Had he done something to displease him? The penance he would d-
"Do not Mutilate yourself. You have not insulted me, nothing you did has. There are others though...:" For a moment Divine wrath flared up and it outburned all the fires of Gehenna Father had walked so far, the exorcist only remaining standing because it was not directed at him.
"There is another world out there, that is in need of your aid."
"Your command is my will!" Father enthusiastically shouted, though.... was he mistaken? For he did not dare to look up on his Lord´s form, he could have sworn to have felt slight disapproval in that very moment. Though it was gone the next second, before he could even come to terms with it.
"Very well..... thank you my son."
Authors Note:
And that was father´s example pov! Hope it gave you a small look into the character. Next and final one is anderson.
Alexander Anderson's dream
- Pronouns
- He
Alexander Anderson's dream
Alexander Anderson was dead. He knew that much one moment he was about to tell Alucard the secret to contentment - hah, he was totally going to say boondock saints at first, that vampire fuck would have been so mad! - but some protestant whore son cunt had stomped on his head before he could tell it! Did that asshole have any idea how hard talking was without a fucking set of lungs?
Still....
"i 'ad imagined 'eaven to be a little different." He looked around, blinking away the headache he still had. Not the worst one in his life to be honest, still a nasty son of a bitch to deal with. After effects of having his brain stomped to mush, if he had to guess.
Not that he did not know this place. The old orphanage looked as much of a shithole as always, though it is one that he could say with some pride he had somewhat visually improved. Granted, it wasn´t as pretty as what he had in mind at first, but all the finger paintings he and his flock had made over the years and hung up were still nice. Even if instinct of a proper multi layered defense system with grenade throwers and bunkers would have been better.
He had already drafted an entire plan to make this bitch a fortress that would have made Rommel and his stupid ass atlantic wall made look like some highschool project, but no, the higher ups in the church had to be stuffy beancounters over it.
'Bla bla, the church couldn´t simply spend billions to fortify an orphanage, bla bla'
Stupid shit. It only meant that he had himself be extra cautious to make sure that any vampire or other inhabitant of the protestant hells who tried to get back at him over the small ones here got to learn just how bad an Idea that was.
And oh, had he made sure of that.
Still, walking through this made him fill awfully nostalgic, he remembered the places where he had the brats had played hide and seek for ours, though it wasn´t the pussy variant the usual kids played. He had given them all something reasonably sharp if safe to ambush and stab him with, if he failed to spot them.
Had to keep himself on the top of the game after all! And the little shits had gotten frustratingly good at it too after a while. Pulling Rambo shit or planning out whole maneuvers to distract him while a smol silent one sneaked up on him for a shank.
Ah, good times…..
The brats were going to miss him, but bah, they were going to get over it after a while. He had raised them to be tough. Taught them how to punch punks properly in the gonads who couldn´t take a no or how to stand up for themselves.
He was going to miss them.
"bah, this shit is way to depressin! Let´s see what the afterlife is properly aboeht!" He wouldn´t even have minded hell too much. Fighting demons like a proper catholic would have been fun! Hell, he'd have gotten a shot at stabbing Hitler in the face! This orphanage without any of the little shits that made it fun just sucked!
He entered the main lunch hall with care. Usually he'd kick doors open in his usual manner, tended to help assholes get the message. But there were more than a few brats who came to be orphans in an unfortunate manner who reacted poorly to that.
Lead to more than a couple wannabee assholes "parents" getting their teeth shoved down their assholes when they tried to pretend to be the big cock star as potential adopters, which meant they didn´t have to follow the rules.
The lunch hall was as empty as the rest of the house, though he saw more than one little 'Chef Anderson' portrait, showing him cooking for the others while wearing a ridiculous chef uniform. The picture looked awful and he hated it, but the little ones wouldn´t ever have stopped whining if he didn´t put it up on their fridge.
That didn´t mean there wasn´t anything interesting around here though. There, right in the middle of the room was a big hole….. Looked almost like a whirl stream, though it was made out of gooey looking shit, through which he could see various monsters storming into what seemed like a cave city filled with tons of dwarf's! Huh, though these dwarfs packed some serious heat compared to those he met in scandinavia.
Still, they were losing, obviously.
Hmmmm. He looked around again.
He supposed he could stay around here, prepare the orphanage once his boys and girls came here as well. Pretty it up a little. Maybe even find some Unicorn like Maria always wanted. Surely in heaven he could find some nice ones, the one on earth all had been rapist pieces of shit.
Or he could go down through this obvious dimension and stab some monsters now. Help some people. Spread the good word a little more.
Heh.
Hehehehehehehehehehe!
Two Bayonets shot out of sleeves, blades of silver steel, his fingers once again grasping around their handles.
What kind of question was that?
With a grin that almost split his face, he jumped through the hole.
It was time for a Crusade!
Authors Note:
And here is Anderson´s dream. Bit different to the ones of the others, but there are reasons for that.
Alexander Anderson was dead. He knew that much one moment he was about to tell Alucard the secret to contentment - hah, he was totally going to say boondock saints at first, that vampire fuck would have been so mad! - but some protestant whore son cunt had stomped on his head before he could tell it! Did that asshole have any idea how hard talking was without a fucking set of lungs?
Still....
"i 'ad imagined 'eaven to be a little different." He looked around, blinking away the headache he still had. Not the worst one in his life to be honest, still a nasty son of a bitch to deal with. After effects of having his brain stomped to mush, if he had to guess.
Not that he did not know this place. The old orphanage looked as much of a shithole as always, though it is one that he could say with some pride he had somewhat visually improved. Granted, it wasn´t as pretty as what he had in mind at first, but all the finger paintings he and his flock had made over the years and hung up were still nice. Even if instinct of a proper multi layered defense system with grenade throwers and bunkers would have been better.
He had already drafted an entire plan to make this bitch a fortress that would have made Rommel and his stupid ass atlantic wall made look like some highschool project, but no, the higher ups in the church had to be stuffy beancounters over it.
'Bla bla, the church couldn´t simply spend billions to fortify an orphanage, bla bla'
Stupid shit. It only meant that he had himself be extra cautious to make sure that any vampire or other inhabitant of the protestant hells who tried to get back at him over the small ones here got to learn just how bad an Idea that was.
And oh, had he made sure of that.
Still, walking through this made him fill awfully nostalgic, he remembered the places where he had the brats had played hide and seek for ours, though it wasn´t the pussy variant the usual kids played. He had given them all something reasonably sharp if safe to ambush and stab him with, if he failed to spot them.
Had to keep himself on the top of the game after all! And the little shits had gotten frustratingly good at it too after a while. Pulling Rambo shit or planning out whole maneuvers to distract him while a smol silent one sneaked up on him for a shank.
Ah, good times…..
The brats were going to miss him, but bah, they were going to get over it after a while. He had raised them to be tough. Taught them how to punch punks properly in the gonads who couldn´t take a no or how to stand up for themselves.
He was going to miss them.
"bah, this shit is way to depressin! Let´s see what the afterlife is properly aboeht!" He wouldn´t even have minded hell too much. Fighting demons like a proper catholic would have been fun! Hell, he'd have gotten a shot at stabbing Hitler in the face! This orphanage without any of the little shits that made it fun just sucked!
He entered the main lunch hall with care. Usually he'd kick doors open in his usual manner, tended to help assholes get the message. But there were more than a few brats who came to be orphans in an unfortunate manner who reacted poorly to that.
Lead to more than a couple wannabee assholes "parents" getting their teeth shoved down their assholes when they tried to pretend to be the big cock star as potential adopters, which meant they didn´t have to follow the rules.
The lunch hall was as empty as the rest of the house, though he saw more than one little 'Chef Anderson' portrait, showing him cooking for the others while wearing a ridiculous chef uniform. The picture looked awful and he hated it, but the little ones wouldn´t ever have stopped whining if he didn´t put it up on their fridge.
That didn´t mean there wasn´t anything interesting around here though. There, right in the middle of the room was a big hole….. Looked almost like a whirl stream, though it was made out of gooey looking shit, through which he could see various monsters storming into what seemed like a cave city filled with tons of dwarf's! Huh, though these dwarfs packed some serious heat compared to those he met in scandinavia.
Still, they were losing, obviously.
Hmmmm. He looked around again.
He supposed he could stay around here, prepare the orphanage once his boys and girls came here as well. Pretty it up a little. Maybe even find some Unicorn like Maria always wanted. Surely in heaven he could find some nice ones, the one on earth all had been rapist pieces of shit.
Or he could go down through this obvious dimension and stab some monsters now. Help some people. Spread the good word a little more.
Heh.
Hehehehehehehehehehe!
Two Bayonets shot out of sleeves, blades of silver steel, his fingers once again grasping around their handles.
What kind of question was that?
With a grin that almost split his face, he jumped through the hole.
It was time for a Crusade!
Authors Note:
And here is Anderson´s dream. Bit different to the ones of the others, but there are reasons for that.
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