Da Klone Waaaaghs!!! (40k x SW)

Created
Status
Ongoing
Watchers
323
Recent readers
0

Prologue:
Anoat System

The Clone Wars had been in full swing for almost two months and the...

Kadaeux

Delta Imperator
Location
Vortice between realities
Prologue:
Anoat System

The Clone Wars had been in full swing for almost two months and the people of Anoat had remained nervous of the events surging from spark to wildfire in the galaxy, yet steadfastly refusing to take a side. As such, it took mere moments for them to notice the discrepancy at the edge of their system, a burst of unnatural light pooling out like a sickness before seeming to collapse back in on itself as if the unlight had never existed.

Several of the observers who happened to spot the event when it originally occurred went mad at the display, ranting and raving about things from beyond.

Half a dozen Toscan 8-Q's headed for the site of the phenomena with a pair of heavily tinkered Cloakshape fighters for anything the 8-Q's couldn't handle. They entered the asteroid field slowly, cautiously their sensors probing out for the phenomena they had spotted, it had certainly been strange. "This is Lackey 3, I have something at grid 250 mark five."

The Cloakshapes turned their sensors in the direction indicated curious and paranoid. "This is Eyeball, let's go in folks and take a look, Lackey, you have the prettiest eyes, care to tell me what you see." The flirting was unwelcome, but the question was serious.

"No idea, I tr... what in the.." Her fighter began to move sedately as she tried to steady herself. "This wasn't here before..." As the others caught up they saw what she meant, the object was incredibly vast, sixty kilometres from stem to stern, knobbled like a potato and yet blistered thickly with technological constructs.

A snort of derision came from Eyeball 2. "This thing looks like it was cobbled together by blind Jawas."

"Be careful all the same, I'm not picking up any power signatures, but a hell of a lot of those look like guns.. or maybe engines... hell maybe even hangars." The entire sight of it was menacing, for all its ramshackle construction it didn't look damaged. "I'm not seeing any activity."

"Lackey 6 here, this thing gives me the creeps."

"This is Eyeball 2, I just got signal spike! Another, two mor..." He stopped speaking, they were all picking it up now, they could even follow the trail of power as one generator sparked up and it helped the next jump back into operation. They felt a shield snap up over the object, then another and more, some covered the entire object, others covered only parts, still more seemed unstable, flickering into existence one moment then gone the next. But still its drives were quiet.

"This ain't good boss..."
 
OI ROIGHT BOYZ! LOOKZ LOIK WEZ FOUND A FOIGHT ALLZREDY! GIT DEM CHOPPAZ UP AND LETZ 'EAR A PROPAH WAAAAGH FROM YEW LOT!

I'm sure things will be fine.
 
Last edited:
Poor sidious, he is about to find out that in the grand scheme of things the sith barely rate in the top hundred of the most destructive forces in the multiverse. Looking forward for more.:D
 
Staff Notice: If we could hold back a little on describing something as 'about to be raped without lube', that would be nice.
So we are about to see the Force being raped without lube by the wonderfull power of WAAAAGH!!!
 
I think this is the second Orkz in Star Wars crossover that I have seen, but the other one seems to have petered out so I am especially interested to see which direction this one will take the story.

I think the idea has great potential.
 
Ironically, as a race of living weapons, the Orks are a Sith Lord's perfect tool. The problem is that they don't have an off switch.
If they could be isolated in a certain sector and regularly sabotaged to promote infighting, they might almost be manageable.
 
I doubt it they should quite resistant to it thanks to their Waaaagh psychic field. Also orks are stupid not weak minded.

To be fair, Orks aren't really stupid either. They just have a different way of looking at the universe. As evidence, remember that virtually ALL orks are bilingual, not only knowing their own native tongue, but Orks have been depicted as near universally conversant in low gothic.

For some reason I missed this. Is this a space Hulk? If it is it must be crawling with so many orks....

It absolutely is. Gotta have a big seed population. *Doesnt directly imply what happens when a bunch of lucky orks get their hands on hyper-capable fighters and freighters and play warbands and warbosses.*

Have you been Mek Mixup quest? I ask because the 'starting,' sector here is the Anoat system.

Actually i'd never even heard of it until now (the Quest, I knew Anoat). I picked Anoat for its early unaffiliated status in the Clone Wars. (And knowing it from Dark Forces)
 
OI GOTZ A PLAN! WOT WE GUNNA DO IZ, WE TURN OFF DA GLOWY BITZ AN ZAT MAKEZ EM FINK WEZ NOT 'ERE! AN WEN DEY FINK DERES NO BOYZ 'ERE TO FOIGHT, WEZ TURN EM BACK ON AND WAAAAGH! IZ PROPAH KUNNIN IT IZ!

To be fair, Orks aren't really stupid either. They just have a different way of looking at the universe. As evidence, remember that virtually ALL orks are bilingual, not only knowing their own native tongue, but Orks have been depicted as near universally conversant in low gothic.

Orks are the smartest species in 40K by a long shot. They have figured out what the most important thing is in life; A BLOODY GOOD FIGHT.

The Orks are perfectly evolved for the 40K universe, as long as there's a fight, the Orks are happy. And even if there isn't a fight, the Orks are more than capable of bringing one on their own.

Everyone else in 40K suffers horribly and can at best look forward to peaceful oblivion in death, and eternal torment is far more likely. Orks though? Orks have it made. If you're an Ork, everything is fine. The Orks have already won at life, and they've been winning every hour of every day of every year ever since.

I'd expect Orks to be pretty much immune to Jedi Mind Tricks, because whatever you might say about their intelligence, Orks are possessed of an utterly indomitable ironclad willpower. Ork willpower is so strong that it literally warps reality in sufficient quantity.

Now, normal mind tricks, like pointing over their shoulder and going "LOOK! A THREE HEADED MONKEY WITH CHAINSAWS!" or something along those lines? Yeah, that'll work.
 
Last edited:
Chapter 1: Flyboyz
Chapter 1
Flyboyz
Anoat System

Lackey 3 didn't engage in the banter surrounding their unease, instead keeping his compound eyes focused wholly on the object they were near, signs of activity began to make themselves known. Cranes on the surface began to move objects from the bowels of the ship. "This is Lackey 3, go dark." He kept the transmission short, but they all obeyed trusting his instincts, he'd always had feelings and they had learned to trust them.

Almost as soon as they could shut down their fighters colossal doors large enough to fit a CR-90 through sideways opened across the vast hulk. Dozens of ships emerged making beelines for the asteroids, firing massive grappling hooks or lashing them with beams of energy drawing them in. They could only watch as the frenzied industry began, mining drills and other machinery they could barely identify began to modify the asteroids without even a pause. Lackey 3 leaned back and watched realizing he had a very big problem.

They were all nestled too close to an unknown mothership for a fleet of unwanted, unwelcome and unidentified miners. With their fighters dark they couldn't communicate safely, but neither could they get out easily. And his sensitivity told him, practically screaming, that if they were there in the next five minutes they were all going to die.

Working fast he tried to boost the range on his helmet comms. "This is Lackey 3. We need to go. Hot start and all power to engines." He said while practicing what he preached.

The drives flared to life and he poured every erg of spare power into the drives, shooting off into the field like a bat out of hell, with his colleagues mostly following him.

"This is Lackey 1. We've been spotted and whatever they are, they're comin!" Instinct said the flight leader was right, and yet his blood ran cold when he checked the sensors and saw almost forty craft in pursuit. "Lackey Squadron, we need to get the Eyeball's home. Break and cover them." With a twist he flicked his 8-Q back towards the oncoming swarm of strange fighters, smoke billowed from their engines into the void of space and their ramshackle appearances were even greater than the massive asteroid they called home.

Suddenly his vision was lit up as a wall of fire came towards them, poorly aimed it seemed the ramshackle crafts noses and wings exploded with fire as they began their assault and Lackey Squadron was turned to the fight of it's life. Forty craft against six old Toscan 8-Q's. The odds were enormously against them as their own laser fire spat out, launching a concussion missile from the small bank of four his own craft had been fitted with one of the craft detonated as laser fire destroyed another.

But the Toscan's shields weren't the greatest, never had been, and the withering volleys of fire came from enough sources to make it problematic and he counted down the seconds until his shield failed. He refused to think about the two people who'd already disappeared from communications as their craft were shot full of holes. As his own shields failed Lackey 3 discovered that their guns weren't really all that powerful, but the number of them was the telling point. The crude ballistic weapons were finding weak seams and points in armour and burying themselves deeply.

"Fall back! The Eyeballs ha..." Lackey lead dropped from the line and Lackey 3 felt his own systems failing, his intuition was no help here, the numbers too great... with a pause he pulled the ejection lever and prayed they didn't simply murder his ejected cockpit.

---------------------------------------​

A startled moment of awareness as he came to in what looked like a Jawa's workshop was not helped by the fact he hung a foot above the ground from thick chains secured to manacles around his wrists and neck. Beyond the curtain he could see parts of Toscan fighters being unloaded from another ramshackle craft. But what he saw was bizarre. The creatures looked like a warped copy of a gamorrean. They were hunched creatures, and yet far far bulkier, they seemed entirely corded in muscle and while they lacked horns, their tusks were significantly more prominent. Smaller creatures ran around following the alien directions given by the beasts, accentuated by swift kicks, violent backhands, thrown boots or the occasional staving in of their heads with massive wrenches.

The small ones terrified him almost as much as the larger, they looked like a Kowakian monkey-lizard had mated with a Gamorrean and successfully produced offspring, and they were as vicious as their masters, the pecking order obvious until...

The curtain was pulled aside and he recoiled, the beast that entered was head and shoulders above the others, and its skin was almost five shades darker, verging on being nearly black. Two more of the beasts entered and looked up at him before moving to the workbenches, they were smaller and their colouration closer to that of the others he'd seen in the bay beyond.

The huge one picked up a wrench and called out.

Writhing with horror as something else came in, his skin prickled in terror as it came in, his sensitivity to the force too small to be taken for Jedi training was nonetheless developed enough that it was screaming at him to get away, escape anything to avoid the creature. It capered about covered in shamanistic fetishes with a copper rod in one hand and two minders with some sort of equipment.

It's brain was exposed and crackled with emerald lightning as it looked at him. The big black one grunted out words to it and he felt his mind crashed under by a wave of power that plucked at his synapses.

Da Mekaniak Boss asks who you are.

The words were in his brain and he gibbered in terror, this was no force manipulation.... "Gaidan Melka!" He screamed and the sparking creature spoke up only for the big one to begin talking at length.

Gud dis werks. Time da figga out wot u kno.

Gaidan began screaming as the creature dived into his mind fully.
 
Oh shit those boyz are being led by a goddamn Mekboss, and from the sound of it a bloody hard one at that. Palpatine is screwed.

By the time anyone figures out what is going on, that entire system is going to be one giant shipyard\weapons factory, and wall to wall with angry, well armed greenskins.
 
Last edited:
Oh shit those boyz are being led by a goddamn Mekboss, and from the sound of it a bloody hard one at that. Palpatine is screwed.

By the time anyone figures out what is going on, that entire system is going to be one giant shipyard\weapons factory, and wall to wall with angry, well armed greenskins.
Ah, but the Republic and CIS both have a bunch of systems sort of like that.
The Orkz don't really have a notable tech or productivity advantage, their advantage is in fighting spirit and their ability to infest worlds. They're also probably better warriors than most of what they might fight.
 
Ah, but the Republic and CIS both have a bunch of systems sort of like that.
The Orkz don't really have a notable tech or productivity advantage, their advantage is in fighting spirit and their ability to infest worlds. They're also probably better warriors than most of what they might fight.
If it was a normal Warboss you'd be right, but Mekbosses are known for leading WAAAGH's with unusually good tek and heavy industry. And if the WAAAGH gets big enough then he'll start becoming a Primork and everyone is screwed.

e: And who knows what he'll be able to do with looted SW tech.
 
Last edited:
Back
Top