Always and Eternal
- Thread starter YseultNott
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Always and Eternal [Complete]
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Statistics (7 threadmarks, 1.1k words)
User Total YseultNott 7 Threadmarks Reader mode
Child
- Pronouns
- He/Him
When Colin is six, he gets a fever.
He feels cold. Shivering. He feels cold, and sleepy, and his head hurts, and he wants to practice his letters but everything hurts too much, and thinking is very hard.
Colin sleeps. Colin sleeps, and wakes up in a bed that isn't his.
There is a woman beside his bed, and she looks like Mom, she has her brown hair and her eyes and her face and her hand, but she's looking at Colin, whispering nice words and smiling kindly at him, and Mom isn't kind, isn't nice, is too busy to just sit next to him and not do anything else.
The woman looks like Mom, but she's not Mom, and Colin wants to ask but it's still hard to think, and all that comes out is a whimper, like he's a baby.
"Shhhhh," Not Mom says, and she doesn't sound like Mom at all. She sounds like the teacher, at school, when she tells a story and makes the voice for the princess's mom, who likes her very very much. "Don't worry, child. It's going to be okay. Whichever way it goes, it's going to be okay."
Colin sleeps again.
He makes it through the fever.
He feels cold. Shivering. He feels cold, and sleepy, and his head hurts, and he wants to practice his letters but everything hurts too much, and thinking is very hard.
Colin sleeps. Colin sleeps, and wakes up in a bed that isn't his.
There is a woman beside his bed, and she looks like Mom, she has her brown hair and her eyes and her face and her hand, but she's looking at Colin, whispering nice words and smiling kindly at him, and Mom isn't kind, isn't nice, is too busy to just sit next to him and not do anything else.
The woman looks like Mom, but she's not Mom, and Colin wants to ask but it's still hard to think, and all that comes out is a whimper, like he's a baby.
"Shhhhh," Not Mom says, and she doesn't sound like Mom at all. She sounds like the teacher, at school, when she tells a story and makes the voice for the princess's mom, who likes her very very much. "Don't worry, child. It's going to be okay. Whichever way it goes, it's going to be okay."
Colin sleeps again.
He makes it through the fever.
Shard
- Pronouns
- He/Him
The next time Colin sees her, he's nineteen, and she looks like him.
She looks like him, except she doesn't. Except she doesn't have the bruises, and the scrapes, and the bags under her eyes, except she's standing tall and strong and untouched.
She looks like him, except she's…
She looks like him, except she's fine.
She looks like him if the last few months hadn't happened. If there hadn't… If he'd…
"You still have time," she says.
Colin doesn't understand.
"Or you could come with me, I suppose," she says. "But I have time, too, and I don't mind the wait."
He looks at her eyes. She's old, he thinks. Older than anyone he ever met. Older than anything he ever saw.
He doesn't want to go with her.
Not yet.
She looks like him, except she doesn't. Except she doesn't have the bruises, and the scrapes, and the bags under her eyes, except she's standing tall and strong and untouched.
She looks like him, except she's…
She looks like him, except she's fine.
She looks like him if the last few months hadn't happened. If there hadn't… If he'd…
"You still have time," she says.
Colin doesn't understand.
"Or you could come with me, I suppose," she says. "But I have time, too, and I don't mind the wait."
He looks at her eyes. She's old, he thinks. Older than anyone he ever met. Older than anything he ever saw.
He doesn't want to go with her.
Not yet.
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Lives
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Colin is twenty-three when he's hit by a bolt of lightning.
Lyon isn't his first Endbringer fight, or his second, or third, but he had a good run of them until now, if anything to do with Endbringers can be called good.
He got lucky then, and he got lucky now, catching the edge of the lightning rather than its full might, having recently worked on his armor insulation, the bolt being small in comparison to what it could have been. He got lucky, but it is too soon yet to tell whether luck will be enough.
This time, she looks like an old woman.
"I see you decided to be a hero," she says, and there is something like approbation in her voice, and Colin isn't sure how to feel about it.
He thinks about the ruins in Lyon, and the dead heroes, and the people they failed to save.
"For all the good it did," Colin says.
She smiles at him, kindly.
"You tried," she says, just as kind. "There is value in that."
Her hands are knobby. Her hands are knobby and her face lined and all of her is weathered in the kind of old that only comes from age, that only comes from living and surviving.
Her eyes are older still.
Lyon isn't his first Endbringer fight, or his second, or third, but he had a good run of them until now, if anything to do with Endbringers can be called good.
He got lucky then, and he got lucky now, catching the edge of the lightning rather than its full might, having recently worked on his armor insulation, the bolt being small in comparison to what it could have been. He got lucky, but it is too soon yet to tell whether luck will be enough.
This time, she looks like an old woman.
"I see you decided to be a hero," she says, and there is something like approbation in her voice, and Colin isn't sure how to feel about it.
He thinks about the ruins in Lyon, and the dead heroes, and the people they failed to save.
"For all the good it did," Colin says.
She smiles at him, kindly.
"You tried," she says, just as kind. "There is value in that."
Her hands are knobby. Her hands are knobby and her face lined and all of her is weathered in the kind of old that only comes from age, that only comes from living and surviving.
Her eyes are older still.
- Location
- Southern Georgia
So this is death he is picturing as his mother.
Her being old and weathered means either this is his time to go, or soon?
Her being old and weathered means either this is his time to go, or soon?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
It's supposed to be subject to interpretation, but what I had in mind while writing was her taking a form adapted to the moment - a comforting mother for a scared child, a version of himself who is strong enough to make it through his lowest point, someone who lived a long life when confronted to the feeling that everyone is dying around him...
Fear
- Pronouns
- He/Him
When Colin is twenty-six, there is a boy on his strike squad, a few years younger than he is. Nicholas. Sleepsong. Colin wouldn't say they're friends, but they get along all right, and it's nice, sometimes, to just sit down and talk.
"Are you afraid of dying?" Nicholas asks one day, and Colin…
Colin has had more than one brush with death. His, others', part of himself's. Somewhere along the line, he made his peace with the knowledge that he would die.
"I'm going to fight her," Colin says, and he's not quite sure why he uses her instead of it, beyond maybe the impression of smiles from half-remembered dreams. "Death. I'm not… I don't want to die, and I'm going to fight her back as long as I can, for myself and for people and…"
He takes a breath, clears his thoughts.
"No," he says. "I'm not afraid."
"I am," Nicholas says. "I'm terrified."
Six months later, Nicholas is transferred to a city team, in one of the smaller, safer departments.
A year later, Colin is leader of the Brockton Bay team, and Nicholas is dead in a fight gone wrong.
Colin isn't sad. Just angry.
"Are you afraid of dying?" Nicholas asks one day, and Colin…
Colin has had more than one brush with death. His, others', part of himself's. Somewhere along the line, he made his peace with the knowledge that he would die.
"I'm going to fight her," Colin says, and he's not quite sure why he uses her instead of it, beyond maybe the impression of smiles from half-remembered dreams. "Death. I'm not… I don't want to die, and I'm going to fight her back as long as I can, for myself and for people and…"
He takes a breath, clears his thoughts.
"No," he says. "I'm not afraid."
"I am," Nicholas says. "I'm terrified."
Six months later, Nicholas is transferred to a city team, in one of the smaller, safer departments.
A year later, Colin is leader of the Brockton Bay team, and Nicholas is dead in a fight gone wrong.
Colin isn't sad. Just angry.
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punster lv1
Killjoy - cheerful shitposter - ignorant pedant
Drowned
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Colin is thirty-four when Leviathan comes to Brockton Bay.
His arm is missing. His arm is missing, and he thinks if he thinks too much about it he might get hysterical, but it's hard to think about anything else when it's not there, when his head is still full of Leviathan's hand closing around him, pulling, of the feeling of bone popping out of socket and the pain and the blood loss and the tearing and…
She's there.
She looks like a kid, like she's sixteen or seventeen. Her skin is pale, grey, wet, like the skin of the drowned, and she has Skitter's hair.
She's quiet, and for the first time, she doesn't feel kind.
When she finally looks at him, she has Aegis's eyes.
His arm is missing. His arm is missing, and he thinks if he thinks too much about it he might get hysterical, but it's hard to think about anything else when it's not there, when his head is still full of Leviathan's hand closing around him, pulling, of the feeling of bone popping out of socket and the pain and the blood loss and the tearing and…
She's there.
She looks like a kid, like she's sixteen or seventeen. Her skin is pale, grey, wet, like the skin of the drowned, and she has Skitter's hair.
She's quiet, and for the first time, she doesn't feel kind.
When she finally looks at him, she has Aegis's eyes.
Flesh
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Mannequin left, and Colin isn't sure he's going to wake up this time.
He tried to kill Mannequin. He tried, as hard as he could. He failed.
He…
"I'm not like him," Colin says. She doesn't answer.
She is made of bones. Old bones, and they might have been white, once, or they might have carried flesh and skin and sinews, but they are brown now, dark and bare and polished, the bones of something dead for a very, very long time.
"I'm not like him," Colin repeats, and she lowers her head, antlers reaching for the sky like twisted, grasping hands, like twin tangled trees, like the upturned belly of a dead spider.
"I'm not," Colin says, pleading, and she doesn't answer.
He tried to kill Mannequin. He tried, as hard as he could. He failed.
He…
"I'm not like him," Colin says. She doesn't answer.
She is made of bones. Old bones, and they might have been white, once, or they might have carried flesh and skin and sinews, but they are brown now, dark and bare and polished, the bones of something dead for a very, very long time.
"I'm not like him," Colin repeats, and she lowers her head, antlers reaching for the sky like twisted, grasping hands, like twin tangled trees, like the upturned belly of a dead spider.
"I'm not," Colin says, pleading, and she doesn't answer.
This is really good, is it practice for NaNoWriMo?
- Pronouns
- He/Him
It's not practice for NaNoWriMo, no, just a series of little snippets I wrote as a way to let out some steam in-between more cohesive projects. I'm glad you like it!
Edit: May I ask why you thought it was practice for NaNo?
Pretty sure NaNoWriMo is coming up soon, might be wrong though.
- Location
- Nightopia
Hmm, if the fight went as canon, I can see why she'd be upset at him.
Stars
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Colin is thirty-seven, and Dragon isn't dead.
They made it through the end of the world. Through Gold Morning and Scion, through Saint and Ascalon, through Teacher, through Pandora.
They made it.
It's strange, really, how strange it feels, sometimes. How unreal, that they both survived, or came back, more or less whole, more or less free. Stranger, even, that he didn't lose her. That she forgave him Pandora, that she didn't leave or make him leave.
The stars are bright over Drachenheim. There were never so many, before.
There is a lot of work left to do, but here, with the snow and the stars and Dragon by his side?
Colin is happy.
They made it through the end of the world. Through Gold Morning and Scion, through Saint and Ascalon, through Teacher, through Pandora.
They made it.
It's strange, really, how strange it feels, sometimes. How unreal, that they both survived, or came back, more or less whole, more or less free. Stranger, even, that he didn't lose her. That she forgave him Pandora, that she didn't leave or make him leave.
The stars are bright over Drachenheim. There were never so many, before.
There is a lot of work left to do, but here, with the snow and the stars and Dragon by his side?
Colin is happy.
And that's it! I hope you had fun!
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punster lv1
Killjoy - cheerful shitposter - ignorant pedant
Well this was a nice read, thank you for sharing.
(I hope I don't sound like a broken record, because I do wholeheartedly mean it.)
(I hope I don't sound like a broken record, because I do wholeheartedly mean it.)