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Uzamaki Naruto, Monkey D. Luffy, Sailor Moon, Tsunade, Shizune, Meito Gai, and Taylor Hebert vs The Entirety of Commoragh

Tiresia

Tiresia

Pronouns
She/Her
Naruto wanders into a webway portal to Commoragh looking for ramen sometime during towards the end of his training with Jiraiya, Tsunade got drunk and wandered into the same portal shortly after, and Shizune follows after her because she wanted to make sure her mentor got home from the bar safely, and Gai likewise did the same.
Luffy got lost and accidentally wandered into a webway portal directly to Commoragh, as did Sailor Moon.
Meanwhile, thanks to Contessa having a little too much vodka, Skitter during her warlord era wakes up in Commoragh with no idea how she got there.

They all end up in the same building in one of the slums of the Dark City, alongside all their standard equipment and possessions.
After their arrival, all portals back to their homes shut down and disappear.

given the personalities of the characters in question, when faced with the evils of the Dark City, none are willing to just stand by passively and allow others to be hurt, and so they agree to work together to fight the evils of the city for as long as possible.

How long do they survive? Can they win?

Note that for the purpose of this thread, I am defining survival as not only not dying, but also not suffering fates worse than death. If a haemunculus makes Naruto into a piece of living, screaming furniture, that doesn't count as survival even if he technically is still aware.
 
Am I missing something? I know she's powerful, but is she more powerful than the other characters I mentioned? I only watched part of the first season. Or are you saying that her reaction to the various evil things will be unusually strong in comparison? I'll be honest, I mostly decided to include her because the mental image of a bunch of archons and haemonculi reacting to, and trying to make sense of, a magical girl doing magical girl things, kinda made me giggle.

Regardless, my prediction would be that provided Taylor can actually convince Naruto, Luffy, and Gai to not rush into things without a plan and actually work together, they could survive for quite a while, especially if they start freeing slaves and seizing weapons for them. Depending on what the bugs are like in Commoragh, Taylor could be even more of a nightmare than she usually is, however, if the people I listed, I'd say Taylor is by far the squishiest, although if either chakra manipulation or Haki are skills that can be taught, then that could change.

The biggest advantage that they have versus Commoragh is that for a lot of dark Eldar archons, their reaction to strange humans causing havoc and freeing slaves won't be existential panic or overwhelming force unless it's their kabal who is being targeted. It will be "how can I make use of this to hurt my rivals or boost my own power". Much like skaven in WHFB, the biggest threat to a dark Eldar in their mind, is another dark Eldar. They will happily sabotage the defenses of their rivals, abandon allied forces to die the moment they think doing so would benefit them, with their only consideration "can I get away with this", rather than any strategic considerations.

Haemunculi covens are a different matter, as for them, "human with unusual physical abilities or supernatural powers and who haven't been mentally and spiritually broken yet" is actually going to be what make them a target/objective, rather than strategic concerns. They will also potentially be harder to root out from their lairs, because Haemunculi tend to fill their lairs with extremely dangerous, extremely advanced traps and horrifying guard monsters. And they have access to a lot of the most esoteric, horrifying, and absurdly powerful tech the Dark Eldar employ. Hex Rifles and ampules of the glass plague, Shattershards, Caskets of Flensing, Dark Gates, Destructors, Husk Blades, Ossefactors, etc.
 
Tiresia said:
Am I missing something? I know she's powerful, but is she more powerful than the other characters I mentioned? I only watched part of the first season. Or are you saying that her reaction to the various evil things will be unusually strong in comparison? I'll be honest, I mostly decided to include her because the mental image of a bunch of archons and haemonculi reacting to, and trying to make sense of, a magical girl doing magical girl things, kinda made me giggle.
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Manga Sailor Moon is more powerful than every other character involved, up to and including Slaanesh. The last arc had her soul and body torn to shreds, before she said "nope", and then resurrected herself, an entire galaxy (exploded stars and planets included), and rewound time so nobody remembered it all.

Anime Sailor Moon isn't as potent, but it's not by much.
 
Well, with Usagi and Naruto, you have basically god and Jesus on the team, so uh... yeah I'd say they win.

Naruto would have Asdrubael Vect talking about his sad backstory and then dying while wanting to be friends and a good guy. Urien Rakarth would somehow get a free pass for everything and continue his experiment while being a quirky guy on the good guy's side.

Luffy would somehow have a slave revolt yet have it be comical despite being heavily political (and based).

The secondary Naruto characters would punch people, I guess? Tsunade and Shizune are good against poisons so that'd be useful I guess, though Usagi can just rez anyone who dies, so...

Taylor... well honestly I think she'd just get smoked unless she's Khepri? She'd be fine thanks to Usagi, but I don't see what she adds to the team.

And Usagi would 1v1 Slaanesh and win, then hopefully the Deldar would chill although it's unlikely since they had a way not to be fucked up and evil already and chose not to do it.
 
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Tiresia said:
Am I missing something? I know she's powerful, but is she more powerful than the other characters I mentioned?
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Sailor Moon is stronger than the God Emperor of Mankind.

She's a planet-busting immortal that can resurrect herself even after her soul has been destroyed, and can keep everyone else on the team healthy and alive even if they were fighting the four Chaos Gods. She's both the team's healer and their strongest DPS and Tank.

Everyone else is pretty much her cheerleader. She solos.
 
Bea said:
Glad that Usagi gets a cheerleader squad as she does all the work.
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I mean, that's accurate to her source material, too :V

Sailor Moon can just purge the entire planet of evil (and repair all the damage that evil did, including the death and destruction of everything), from orbit, in a single shot. A capability she's used repeatedly, starting as early as the end of the Dark Kingdom arc.
 
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This is like if someone made a Star Wars versus debate where one side consisted of five or six random fighters and frigates, and also the Death Star II.
 
Mister Bad Guy said:
This is like if someone made a Star Wars versus debate where one side consisted of five or six random fighters and frigates, and also the Death Star II.
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Yeah, that was my bad. I must have misremembered how powerful Usagi actually was, and assumed she was, like, powerful enough to face-world ending threats, but not so powerful that everything would be a cake walk for her.

Renu said:
Taylor... well honestly I think she'd just get smoked unless she's Khepri? She'd be fine thanks to Usagi, but I don't see what she adds to the team.
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My thought was that the group needed someone who could actually plan and strategize rather than defaulting to running straight at enemies and punching then in the face. Basically, I figured that she could balance out the fact that I'm pretty sure Naruto and Luffy collectively have a single brain cell between them, at least when it comes to impulse control and long-term planning. And Gai is…extremely enthusiastic, as well.
 
Tiresia said:
My thought was that the group needed someone who could actually plan and strategize rather than defaulting to running straight at enemies and punching then in the face. Basically, I figured that she could balance out the fact that I'm pretty sure Naruto and Luffy collectively have a single brain cell between them, at least when it comes to impulse control and long-term planning. And Gai is…extremely enthusiastic, as well.
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Disregarding Usagi because as you've said she's just bonkers strong, Jiraiya and Tsunade are also both here Tsunade is also here? I don't think Taylor is all that smarter than her and she's certainly far less experienced.

e: scratch that, Jiraiya isn't here, only Tsunade, but I think my point still stands.
 
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Patak said:
scratch that, Jiraiya isn't here, only Tsunade, but I think my point still stands.
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As I understand it (and bear in mind that my entire knowledge of Naruto comes from fanfic, fandom osmosis, and occasional looks at wikis, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), Tsunade is very smart, but she's specifically a medic and an excellent fighter, not necessarily a particularly good strategist or tactician, and she actively does not want any sort of leadership role. She's definitely better than Naruto, but like, that isn't exactly saying much. Taylor has experience as a warlord and leader of both parahumans and regular people in a gang-riven urban nightmare and she has faced the equivalent of haemonculi in the form of bonesaw.
 
Tiresia said:
As I understand it (and bear in mind that my entire knowledge of Naruto comes from fanfic, fandom osmosis, and occasional looks at wikis, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), Tsunade is very smart, but she's specifically a medic and an excellent fighter, not necessarily a particularly good strategist or tactician, and she actively does not want any sort of leadership role. She's definitely better than Naruto, but like, that isn't exactly saying much. Taylor has experience as a warlord and leader of both parahumans and regular people in a gang-riven urban nightmare and she has faced the equivalent of haemonculi in the form of bonesaw.
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I think you're overhyping Taylor a bit. Kind of the whole point of Worm is that she didn't, in fact, manage to lead people. It's pretty much her last words in the story.
 
Tiresia said:
As I understand it (and bear in mind that my entire knowledge of Naruto comes from fanfic, fandom osmosis, and occasional looks at wikis, so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong), Tsunade is very smart, but she's specifically a medic and an excellent fighter, not necessarily a particularly good strategist or tactician, and she actively does not want any sort of leadership role. She's definitely better than Naruto, but like, that isn't exactly saying much. Taylor has experience as a warlord and leader of both parahumans and regular people in a gang-riven urban nightmare and she has faced the equivalent of haemonculi in the form of bonesaw.
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.. Yesn't?

If you set the Naruto timeline at 'near the end of the Jiraiya/Naruto roadtrip' then we're right before Shippuden, which means that this is Tsunade after she got over most her issues and accepted the position of Hokage.

Tsunade would have been the leader of an entire militarized city-state for a couple years by that point.

I'll grant that Taylor might be better at on the fly improvisation, because ultimately she's just a squishy human with bug control and she had to learn how to improvise to survive whereas Tsunade was always a powerhouse that could brute force through most things in her own setting.

(Though funnily enough, stereotypes aside Naruto is the other excellent improvisational tactician in this group, he's shown multiple times that he's actually very clever and cunning in battle)
 
Even without Sailor Moon, Saitama could punch through the dimensional barriers and collapse the whole place with one punch so.

also yeah seriously why is Taylor even there tbh
 
As the joke goes, the only reason 'Azathoth in a miniskirt' is an inappropriate nickname for Usagi is because if anything it undersells her.

EDIT: And yeah, as with everyone else I don't see Taylor's use here. You've got the best improvisational tactician of the list in Naruto, someone in charge of literally an entire nation/military in Tsunade, the third most powerful ninja possibly fucking ever in Gai (he is legitimately insanely dangerous in a way that's hard to overstate, this is the man who nearly took out super!Madara while super!Madara was explicitly unkillable), Luffy is ridiculously strong if his metaphysics work and they should because we're assuming eveyone else's do...

Like, what does 'oh I'm a knock-off Aburame but worse' get you?
 
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Kaboomatic said:
Being fair, there's no way in hell that Commoragh's cleanliness is up to code. Every single bug in the slave pits rising up to eat you is pretty scary.
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Don't forget any giant bugs the beastmasters had brought to their arenas from realspace (5th edition DE. Codex lists beasts called Helspiders as a commonly used animal by beastmasters, which could potentially include things like Catachan Devils (or really, any of the insects from Catachan), Heretic Ants, Ambull, Vein Worms, Arachnospila, Arthromite Dunescuttlers, mind-controlling Cortical Leeches (as if Skitter wasn't scary enough, now she master people as well as bugs, albeit not as easily as she would as Khepri), any sufficiently insectoid humanoid like vespids, or sufficiently insectoid or worm-like artificial creations of homunculi. And I'm sure if I browsed the Fauna page on Lexicanum, I'd probably find more.

Commoragh is a major hub of the webway, and beastmasters are known for seeking out creatures from across the length and breadth of the galaxy looking for the deadliest beasts.
 
How'd this get more popular than my thread? It's an interesting premise, but it has no theme in the characters fighting or the settings.

And it seems to have gotten popular for all the wrong reasons. In that it's a curbstomp for Sailor Moon…
 
Ultimate said:
How'd this get more popular than my thread? It's an interesting premise, but it has no theme in the characters fighting or the settings.

And it seems to have gotten popular for all the wrong reasons. In that it's a curbstomp for Sailor Moon…
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It does sorta have a theme, in that most of them (Shizune, Tsunade, and Taylor excepted) are characters who are enthusiastic, frequently optimistic (not sure if that's the right word) characters who believe in things like The Power of Friendship. In essence, they a complete tonal mismatch with the horrors of Commoragh. I failed to account for just how powerful Sailor Moon was, however. I'd advise you to just ignore her for this scenario since I did not realize what she was actually capable of. Or just assume this version of Usagi got her magical girl powers from Wish.c0m, and thus only has access to a tiny fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of a fraction of her canon power.
 
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