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Marked for Death: A Rational Naruto Quest

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faflec said:
Alright, all joking aside, could we contact Jiraiya instead of Zabuza? He's stronger, more inclined to help us, and we've felt his KI before (however restrained). Plus we have a Summoning Scroll he used, unlike Zabuza!
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How would you propose modifying it to do that? I figured Z would be easier since he has unfinished business with us of a sort, and it would be less emotionally crushing if it doesn't work.
 
[X] Action Plan: Real Estate Play

I think we have options other for moderating Orochimaru, why not use Kabuto as a way to to do it?

He's already interested in poking at us because of the seizure. And let's face it, he already knows something's up.

Anywho, the goal is to make Hazo a mystery, a rare specimen and assistant that Oro has to figure out, one that prevents him from spending time on his more inhumane experiments.

So, something like this in the next plan after this one:

Meet with Kabuto (Optimize with Mari):
  • Use Kabuto to exploit Orochimaru's interest in your seizure (distract him from vulnerable people)
    • Drop hints about your Out exposure,your vi.
    • Encourage the spread of game night activities for KEI ninja and civies (Protection in groups)
 
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faflec said:
Alright, all joking aside, could we contact Jiraiya instead of Zabuza? He's stronger, more inclined to help us, and we've felt his KI before (however restrained). Plus we have a Summoning Scroll he used, unlike Zabuza!
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Jiraiya would be a sore point for the clan, especially Mari. Lets not get their hopes up prematurely. Best try and contact him after we get Z.
 
Ok, I know I voted for the plan, but why are we trying to contact Zabby?

We must know some dead people who are actually pretty well inclined towards us. Even if Jiraiya is a sore point, Guy is a pretty good target, as is Sarutobi.

Also, it's not like we have to tell them who we're trying to call upon.
 
*reads winning plan*

Kiba said:
Attempt to contact the other Paths for spiritual guidance. Remember: reality is probably still very thin around you.
  • Prep:
    • Attempt to widen the dimensional apertures via continuous sealing/unsealing of a few dozen storage scrolls .
    • Arrange an array of party trick seals around you in the most eldritch fashion possible.
    • Play the spooky flute music in between renditions of a new piece entitled "Zabuza cannot find a needle in a sewing kit, especially now that he's dead!"
    • Pay some Genin to stand around and do the Dance of Please Let The Walls of Reality Crumble (invert the motions of the Dance of Pray Reality Does Not Break Down ).
    • Drench the ground with leftover (from the Basement) chicken blood so that it smells like death.
    • Focus overwhelmingly on the feeling of hunting demons that was Z's killing intent, maybe send some psychic messages back "Here I am, come on and get me!"
  • When it works:
    • "Haha! Who is the idiot now ghosts!?"
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Are we having a youthsuit moment, or what?
 
[X] Action plan: Hugs for snakes
[X] And Push It Somewhere Else
[X] Action Plan: Contracts and Contacts
 
If y'all have any suggestions for a plan that doesn't have Hazō take hallucinogenic when he's mentally fucked up without a trip sitter I'd love to hear them
Oneiros said:
[x] Action plan: Hugs for snakes

Discuss with Naruto and Mari
  • With the arrival of of Orochimaru Leaf's political situation has drastically changed
  • Hiashi doesn't have the strength to stand up to him. Nor does he have an S-ranker on call like we dp
  • I'd like for us to strike up an alliance with him for the time being
    • We can coordinate with him to stop Orochimaru excess plus give him a united front in Leaf for the upcoming war
    • Of course we will wring him dry
    • Concessions we are wanting to get from include
      1. The Shimura estate
      2. The dog scroll
      3. Access to Arkadia's notes
      4. Teacher from Mist so Hazo and Noburi can better use there bloodlines better in service of Leaf
The meeting: Hazo and Mari go
  • Hazo will play bad ANBU while Mari Plays good ANBU
    • Hazo needs to keep in mind that he has faced down scary people than Hiashi
      • He's not the greatest hunter nin in the world who wants to kill him
      • He's not a mad scientist who wants to vivisect him
    • play up the fact that Orochimaru is essentially Kage in name
    • But if Hiashi cooperates he has a ninja in his faction who can stand up to Orochimaru in the village constantly
      • In fact Hazō is close to becoming his apprentice. So Hiashi would have direct information from his inner workings
    • if he doesn't well we might have to work with our Dear Uncle
Have Noburi talk to Kabuto
  • It sure is delightful that Orochimaru returned to Leaf safe and sound.
  • Our deal is, of course, void. Would you mind if we started from a blank slate?
  • By the way, how's the study on him coming along?
Miscellaneous
  • Lease underground space beneath properties adjacent to our tavern. Employ seals and Earth jutsu to build tunnels and rooms there, connected to our tavern.
    • Get Keiko's help. She still has Panjandrum, right?
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Edits in blue

Oneiros said:
[x] Action plan: Hugs for snakes

Discuss with Naruto and Mari
  • With the arrival of of Orochimaru Leaf's political situation has drastically changed
  • Hiashi doesn't have the strength to stand up to him. Nor does he have an S-ranker on call like we do
  • I'd like for us to strike up an alliance with him for the time being
    • We can coordinate with him to stop Orochimaru excess plus give him a united front in Leaf for the upcoming war
    • while we are discussing this we will make the threat that Orochimaru has offered to become our clan head in exchange for our support.
      • And we'd obviously have to help him in whatever goals he had. Up to taking the Hat from Hiashi
      • Unless we knew that we had the support of Leafs current Hokage
    • Of course we will wring him dry
    • Concessions we are wanting to get from include
      1. The Shimura estate
      2. The dog scroll
      3. Access to Arkadia's notes
      4. Teacher from Mist so Hazo and Noburi can better use there bloodlines better in service of Leaf
The meeting: Hazo, Mar and Naruto go
  • Hazo will play bad ANBU while Mari Plays good ANBU
    • All threats are veiled/ subtle
    • Hazo needs to keep in mind that he has faced down scarier people than Hiashi
      • He's not the greatest hunter nin in the world who wants to kill him
      • He's not a mad scientist who wants to vivisect him
    • play up the fact that Orochimaru is essentially Kage in name
    • But if Hiashi cooperates he has a ninja in his faction who can stand up to Orochimaru in the village constantly
      • In fact Hazō is close to becoming his apprentice. So Hiashi would have direct information from his inner workings
    • if he doesn't well we might have to work with our Dear Uncle
    • If he does agree to our terms he will have a unified leaf while facing the upcoming crises
Miscellaneous
  • Lease underground space beneath properties adjacent to our tavern. Employ seals and Earth jutsu to build tunnels and rooms there, connected to our tavern.
    • Get Keiko's help. She still has Panjandrum, right?
  • Conduct creative training daily.
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@Kiba

Roomba's right about contacting part. We should ease our way there.
Also, we might want to inform the clan about why we want drugs.

We'll say we need to ground ourselves for upcoming interactions with Orochimaru. We can' go full disclosure on the real reason though. We may be deemed mentally compromised and should not be head.

Anyway, could you add Something like this.
  • Inform the clan you want to get more mentally resileint for future Orochimaru encounters.
 
@Oneiros, here's a global rewrite of your plan. I think it flows better, and does show-don't-tell on veiled/subtle threats. I also added more concessions.

  • Meet with Hiashi. (Optimize with Mari and Naruto, take them along.)
    • Thoughts:
      • Orochimaru's arrival drastically rewrote Leaf's political landscape. Hiashi doesn't have the strength to stand up to him, nor an S-ranker for protection/support.
      • We can get concessions out of him by promising cooperation, and threatening to back Orochimaru if he declines.
    • Mindset: You've faced people far scarier than Hiashi — he's nowhere near Zabuza or Orochimaru.
    • Concessions we want (if some aren't viable, downscale what we're offering proportionally):
      • Primary: The Dog Scroll; the Shimura Compound; credible assurance we won't be sent on suicide missions.
      • Secondary: Arikada's notes; Mist allowing Hazou, Noburi, and Keiko to learn bloodline secrets (with teachers provided, if necessary).
      • Tertiary: Degree of control over the Academy's curriculum (consult Kagome). Hiashi stops fucking with Naruto's Council seat. More adoption slots.
    • Tactics:
      • Inform Hiashi that Orochimaru had agreed to be adopted in exchange for becoming Clan Head and learning clan-secret jutsu and Jiraiya's seals.
      • Say you're planning to go along, since you feel unsafe without the compound and with the war looming — which might prove particularly dangerous to us.
        • [Primary concessions] would make you feel safer.
      • Additionally, you're interested in Orochimaru's work, and fear that your growth would be stunted in Leaf as-is. You've offered to become his apprentice. If that shakes out, and if Orochimaru would be so inclined, you'd encourage him to climb even higher than the Clan Head.
        • [Secondary concessions] would dismiss your fears.
      • But you understand Orochimaru has a somewhat... unruly personality. If most/all your concerns were addressed, you'd consider helping the Tower manage him — as would our clan's friend, Uzumaki. In addition, you'd support the Tower in earnest in these trying times, if you started feeling truly welcomein Leaf.
        • [Tertiary concessions] would make you feel welcome.
    • Contingencies: If Hiashi suggests that we won't follow through because Orochimaru will...
      • ... vivisect random civilians, whom we care about: recite your ruthless-utilitarianism thought-process.
      • ... vivisect us: claim that Jiraiya made Uncle Oro promise not to harm us, and we're better tools while undamaged anyway.
  • Other:
    • Lease underground space beneath properties adjacent to our tavern. Employ seals and Earth jutsu to build tunnels and rooms there, connected to our tavern.
      • Get Keiko's help (Pangolins).
    • Conduct creative training daily.
 
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Noumero said:
@Oneiros, here's a global rewrite of your plan. I think it flows better, and does show-don't-tell on veiled/subtle threats. I also added more concessions.

  • Meet with Hiashi. (Optimize with Mari and Naruto, take them along.)
    • Thoughts:
      • Orochimaru's arrival drastically rewrote Leaf's political landscape. Hiashi doesn't have the strength to stand up to him, nor an S-ranker for protection/support.
      • We can get concessions out of him by promising cooperation, and threatening to back Orochimaru if he declines.
    • Mindset: You've faced people far scarier than Hiashi — he's nowhere near Zabuza or Orochimaru.
    • Concessions we want (if some aren't viable, downscale what we're offering proportionally):
      • Primary: The Dog Scroll; the Shimura Compound; credible assurance we won't be sent on suicide missions.
      • Secondary: Arikada's notes; Mist allowing Hazou, Noburi, and Keiko to learn bloodline secrets (with teachers provided, if necessary).
      • Tertiary: Degree of control over the Academy's curriculum (consult Kagome). Hiashi stops fucking with Naruto's Council seat. More adoption slots.
    • Tactics:
      • Inform Hiashi that Orochimaru had agreed to be adopted in exchange for becoming Clan Head and learning clan-secret jutsu and Jiraiya's seals.
      • Say you're planning to go along, since you feel unsafe without the compound and with the war looming — which might prove particularly dangerous to us.
        • [Primary concessions] would make you feel safer.
      • Additionally, you're interested in Orochimaru's work, and fear that your growth would be stunted in Leaf as-is. You've offered to become his apprentice. If that shakes out, and if Orochimaru would be so inclined, you'd encourage him to climb even higher than the Clan Head.
        • [Secondary concessions] would dismiss your fears.
      • But you understand Orochimaru has a somewhat... unruly personality. If most/all your concerns were addressed, you'd consider helping the Tower manage him — as would our clan's friend, Uzumaki. In addition, you'd support the Tower in earnest in these trying times, if you started feeling truly welcomein Leaf.
        • [Tertiary concessions] would make you feel welcome.
    • Contingencies: If Hiashi suggests that we won't follow through because Orochimaru will...
      • ... vivisect random civilians, whom we care about: recite your ruthless-utilitarianism thought-process.
      • ... vivisect us: claim that Jiraiya made Uncle Oro promise not to harm us, and we're better tools while undamaged anyway.
  • Other:
    • Lease underground space beneath properties adjacent to our tavern. Employ seals and Earth jutsu to build tunnels and rooms there, connected to our tavern.
      • Get Keiko's help (Pangolins).
    • Conduct creative training daily.
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Thank you as always @Noumero.
 
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