Eh. Depending on how you interpret the "yer a squid, Good Hunter" ending.
And it's... Interesting. I admit that I'm not exactly a fan of always-good paradigms. (I mean who else but me would try to develop the Ayleidoon from Elder Scrolls rather than Pelinal?) But it's well-written, though I see some spelling and grammar issues.
I know its got a grounding for some darkness like @Kalrotix wants but i feel that if we want darkness use the quest itself to make it happen so that we see the DESCENT into madness, so to speak, rather then the final result
I like this take on Salem, a much more malevolent version of Kos, some say Kosm. I was actually thinking of making Salem a Great One, but this take is much more up my ally. Danke, and I'm still coming up with ideas for other Great Ones.
Also other Hunters, and what do you guys think of a Scholar version of Penny, except she's much more...Eccentric. Considering she's basically a biological version of the Doll, and much stranger.
I like this take on Salem, a much more malevolent version of Kos, some say Kosm. I was actually thinking of making Salem a Great One, but this take is much more up my ally. Danke, and I'm still coming up with ideas for other Great Ones.
Also other Hunters, and what do you guys think of a Scholar version of Penny, except she's much more...Eccentric. Considering she's basically a biological version of the Doll, and much stranger.
I'm very proud of that little adaptation. Glad I could help!
And Penny Polendina, the Byrgenwyrth Scholar? That.... Makes too much sense. Like Bloody Stupid Johnson building Yharnam.
Other Great Ones? Hm.... Well... the Maidens would probably be their creations, rather than Great Ones themselves... Since Ozpin is Salem's rival, he might be the Moon Presence equivalent...
The Brother Gods? Darkness could match to Amygdala, Light could be Ebrietas...
I'm very proud of that little adaptation. Glad I could help!
And Penny Polendina, the Byrgenwyrth Scholar? That.... Makes too much sense. Like Bloody Stupid Johnson building Yharnam.
Other Great Ones? Hm.... Well... the Maidens would probably be their creations, rather than Great Ones themselves... Since Ozpin is Salem's rival, he might be the Moon Presence equivalent...
The Brother Gods? Darkness could match to Amygdala, Light could be Ebrietas...
Atlas Scholar, but yes that's what I was going for. I was also thinking of them representing different things, the Light Brother represents the pursuit of knowledge and insight like Ebrietas, while the Dark Brother represents the innate, primal fear of the unknown, and he actively cultivates this like the Amygdala.
As for Oedon and Mergo, well I'm stumped there but I'm thinking of going the original character- Wait, no. You know the relics, yes? Those could be the Chalice Dungeon Entrances, and for Oedon and Mergo we could keep them constants since I have no clue on who their counterparts in Remnant would be.
Atlas Scholar, but yes that's what I was going for. I was also thinking of them representing different things, the Light Brother represents the pursuit of knowledge and insight like Ebrietas, while the Dark Brother represents the innate, primal fear of the unknown, and he actively cultivates this like the Amygdala.
As for Oedon and Mergo, well I'm stumped there but I'm thinking of going the original character- Wait, no. You know the relics, yes? Those could be the Chalice Dungeon Entrances, and for Oedon and Mergo we could keep them constants since I have no clue on who their counterparts in Remnant would be.
I know, but I was thinking sort of how they named the city after her, we do this like if instead of Yharnam it was say...Mistral, though I'm leaning towards Vale for its similar architecture and feel.
I know, but I was thinking sort of how they named the city after her, we do this like if instead of Yharnam it was say...Mistral, though I'm leaning towards Vale for its similar architecture and feel.
[X] Plan alternativ Erin
[X] Name: Erin(pronounced Air-in) Crimson
[X] Age:16
[X] Race (Human or Faunus, please Specify): Wolf faunus (ears)
[X] Color Scheme:Red and white
[X] Homeland:Atlas but currently lives in Vale
[X] Appearance: A yoing man with a rough and tumble appearance wearing a tall coat with a tricorn hat that was his "grandfathers" prize memento said to be from the faunus rights revolution taken from general lagoon himself. now is worn as a keep sake with three scars running down his face his hair an odd mixture of red and white with a respectable six feet of height with a wiry frame belying his strength and intelect and an old signet ring with a wolfs head in the middle of a snowflake said to be from his birth father he wears it constantly.
[X] Any Family?: Nicholas Schnee (for glyphs)(old but it could lead to fun shenanigans later on is not known to be his father(to clarify the PC doesnt know but Nicholas and mara do know who his father is)) Mother: Mara Crimson: A former mine worker and friend to Jack Schnee in his later life and left to keep the rumors of their friendship being beyond appropriate and unknown to the wider public it was more then rumors despite being in her mid 30's atr the time she had her son Erin looks like shes barely in her MId 20's due to a remarkable vitality.
[X] Right Hand Weapon Description: An elegant rapier-gun terribly effective to thrust but remaining able to deliver deadly cuts. taken from general lagoon with etchings added in by his Grandfather with a long series of thorn like etchings and a dust port with the hilt next to the gun mechanism Its name is the bite of Mantle
[X] Left Hand Weapon Description: An elegant Yatagan revolver, shorter than his rapier but able to make monstruous cuts and efficient thrust. with the ability to channel dust into the shots as well as the blade. Its name is The Sting of Truth
[X] History: The Young man from Atlas was born to a single mother in a low rent town house due to having gotten a bad reputation due to both being a faunus and an illegitimate child born out of wedlock only ever knowing his father from a Signet ring sent to his mother when he was two and a small yet sizable amount of money from an anonymous source. He has faced an increase in discrimination due to the white fang but is choosing to not only blame current policy but the fang under Sienna Khan for giving such policy makers the justification to discriminate against them. As the only Faunus in his school he was bullied relentlessly save for one human friend who happened to have a brother in the Atlas millitary as an aide for winter schnee and general Ironwood. But a 12 years old his friend die triying to stop a White Fang terrorist. This die will profondly mark him and convince him that heroism is useless, his friend died unnecessarily, without preventing the flight.
This event convince his that he need to become stronger to survive. He was also convinced that trying to ssolve the problem of faunus couldn't be resolve simply with good intentions, he though that to ameliorate things he must become an important figure, and become a hunter was another way to succeed.
His mother knowing what her son was aiming to become managed to scrape some funds and send him to signal as well as giving him weapons supposedly from her Grandfather(actually his Fathers) and sent him to signal. In the beginning he was sullen and withdrawn but with time he learn to become more social, he knew that for his objectives he couldn't be associal and he should made a lot of efforts to be social and charming with peoples, even if he should forced him or lying.
He made his first real friend when he met a young girl naming Ruby Rose whose perky demeanor reminded him so much of his long dead friend and could not help but warm up to her. Even if her naivety frustrated him some times he never could be angry with her. After he met her sister Yang Xia Long that he appreciated for her joyful and sympathic personality, even if her love for fighting was a little to ittle too uncontrollable to his taste. But he has a rivality and animosity angainst Weiss Schnee, because he think that she is an arrogant spoil girl who don't deserved her weath. He has also big problems with the Schenne compagny for his politic with faunus.
Personality: He is a complex individual whose drive for knowledge because he think that it's the only way for peoples like him to escape poverty and misery. He is passionnate by the origin of beasthood and don't hesitate to steal research of mad scientistin hopes they have made strides in that question. If he can be very social and charming with peoples, it often a false apparence. in reality he has difficulties to trust peoples and don't hesitate to forgot them if they have no more utilities for him. But with peoples who gain his friendship he can be realy kind and very protective. Especialy with Ruby Rose and her sister, and could be terrible violent if bad things happend to them.
He has ambition to become an influent man to ameliorate the situation of faunus, because he is persuade that the ways are useless. But his motivation is also a consequence of the poor and difficult life that he lived with his mother. His ambitions to maliorate the chohabitation between humans and faunus is real, but he want become someone and evade the poverty definitely too.
He loves a good fight but hates for those uninvolved to be dragged into it, as they did not choose to take part nor did they want it to happen and shows no real mercy to those who do.
[X] Plan alternativ Erin
[X] Name: Erin(pronounced Air-in) Crimson
[X] Age:16
[X] Race (Human or Faunus, please Specify): Wolf faunus (ears)
[X] Color Scheme:Red and white
[X] Homeland:Atlas but currently lives in Vale
[X] Appearance: A yoing man with a rough and tumble appearance wearing a tall coat with a tricorn hat that was his "grandfathers" prize memento said to be from the faunus rights revolution taken from general lagoon himself. now is worn as a keep sake with three scars running down his face his hair an odd mixture of red and white with a respectable six feet of height with a wiry frame belying his strength and intelect and an old signet ring with a wolfs head in the middle of a snowflake said to be from his birth father he wears it constantly.
[X] Any Family?: Nicholas Schnee (for glyphs)(old but it could lead to fun shenanigans later on is not known to be his father(to clarify the PC doesnt know but Nicholas and mara do know who his father is)) Mother: Mara Crimson: A former mine worker and friend to Jack Schnee in his later life and left to keep the rumors of their friendship being beyond appropriate and unknown to the wider public it was more then rumors despite being in her mid 30's atr the time she had her son Erin looks like shes barely in her MId 20's due to a remarkable vitality.
[X] Right Hand Weapon Description: An elegant rapier-gun terribly effective to thrust but remaining able to deliver deadly cuts. taken from general lagoon with etchings added in by his Grandfather with a long series of thorn like etchings and a dust port with the hilt next to the gun mechanism Its name is the bite of Mantle
[X] Left Hand Weapon Description: An elegant Yatagan revolver, shorter than his rapier but able to make monstruous cuts and efficient thrust. with the ability to channel dust into the shots as well as the blade. Its name is The Sting of Truth
[X] History: The Young man from Atlas was born to a single mother in a low rent town house due to having gotten a bad reputation due to both being a faunus and an illegitimate child born out of wedlock only ever knowing his father from a Signet ring sent to his mother when he was two and a small yet sizable amount of money from an anonymous source. He has faced an increase in discrimination due to the white fang but is choosing to not only blame current policy but the fang under Sienna Khan for giving such policy makers the justification to discriminate against them. As the only Faunus in his school he was bullied relentlessly save for one human friend who happened to have a brother in the Atlas millitary as an aide for winter schnee and general Ironwood. But a 12 years old his friend die triying to stop a White Fang terrorist. This die will profondly mark him and convince him that heroism is useless, his friend died unnecessarily, without preventing the flight.
This event convince his that he need to become stronger to survive. He was also convinced that trying to ssolve the problem of faunus couldn't be resolve simply with good intentions, he though that to ameliorate things he must become an important figure, and become a hunter was another way to succeed.
His mother knowing what her son was aiming to become managed to scrape some funds and send him to signal as well as giving him weapons supposedly from her Grandfather(actually his Fathers) and sent him to signal. In the beginning he was sullen and withdrawn but with time he learn to become more social, he knew that for his objectives he couldn't be associal and he should made a lot of efforts to be social and charming with peoples, even if he should forced him or lying.
He made his first real friend when he met a young girl naming Ruby Rose whose perky demeanor reminded him so much of his long dead friend and could not help but warm up to her. Even if her naivety frustrated him some times he never could be angry with her. After he met her sister Yang Xia Long that he appreciated for her joyful and sympathic personality, even if her love for fighting was a little to ittle too uncontrollable to his taste. But he has a rivality and animosity angainst Weiss Schnee, because he think that she is an arrogant spoil girl who don't deserved her weath. He has also big problems with the Schenne compagny for his politic with faunus.
Personality: He is a complex individual whose drive for knowledge because he think that it's the only way for peoples like him to escape poverty and misery. He is passionnate by the origin of beasthood and don't hesitate to steal research of mad scientistin hopes they have made strides in that question. If he can be very social and charming with peoples, it often a false apparence. in reality he has difficulties to trust peoples and don't hesitate to forgot them if they have no more utilities for him. But with peoples who gain his friendship he can be realy kind and very protective. Especialy with Ruby Rose and her sister, and could be terrible violent if bad things happend to them.
He has ambition to become an influent man to ameliorate the situation of faunus, because he is persuade that the ways are useless. But his motivation is also a consequence of the poor and difficult life that he lived with his mother. His ambitions to maliorate the chohabitation between humans and faunus is real, but he want become someone and evade the poverty definitely too.
He loves a good fight but hates for those uninvolved to be dragged into it, as they did not choose to take part nor did they want it to happen and shows no real mercy to those who do.
Is he willing to help if he sees people about to die even if he doesnt seek them out. And i assume that since Nicholas sent money and weapons that he does care about his son other wise you have my vote [X] Plan alternativ Erin
did you get the word play on E'r(i.e always) in crimson by having it pronounced that way
Ah well. Guess Clay was just a source for idea scavenge.
Adhoc vote count started by King Tharassian on Feb 27, 2018 at 8:44 AM, finished with 66 posts and 3 votes.
[X] Plan Erin
[X] Name: Erin(pronounced Air-in) Crimson
[X] Age:16
[X] Race (Human or Faunus, please Specify): Wolf faunus (ears)
[X] Color Scheme:Red and white
[X] Homeland:Atlas but currently lives in Vale
[X] Appearance: A yoing man with a rough and tumble appearance wearing a tall coat with a tricorn hat that was his "grandfathers" prize memento said to be from the faunus rights revolution taken from general lagoon himself. now is worn as a keep sake with three scars running down his face his hair an odd mixture of red and white with a respectable six feet of height with a wiry frame belying his strength and intelect and an old signet ring with a wolfs head in the middle of a snowflake said to be from his birth father he wears it constantly.
[X] Any Family?: Nicholas Schnee (for glyphs)(old but it could lead to fun shenanigans later on is not known to be his father(to clarify the PC doesnt know but Nicholas and mara do know who his father is)) Mother: Mara Crimson: A former mine worker and friend to Jack Schnee in his later life and left to keep the rumors of their friendship being beyond appropriate and unknown to the wider public it was more then rumors despite being in her mid 30's atr the time she had her son Erin looks like shes barely in her MId 20's due to a remarkable vitality.
[X] Right Hand Weapon Description: An elegant rapier-gun terribly effective to thrust but remaining able to deliver deadly cuts. taken from general lagoon with etchings added in by his Grandfather with a long series of thorn like etchings and a dust port with the hilt next to the gun mechanism Its name is the bite of Mantle
[X] Left Hand Weapon Description: An elegant Yatagan revolver, shorter than your rapier but able to make monstruous cuts and efficient thrust. with the ability to channel dust into the shots as well as the blade. Its name is The Sting of Truth
[X] History: The Young man from Atlas was born to a single mother in a low rent town house due to having gotten a bad reputation due to both being a faunus and an illegitimate child born out of wedlock only ever knowing his father from a Signet ring sent to his mother when he was two and a small yet sizable amount of money from an anonymous source. He has faced an increase in discrimination due to the white fang but is choosing to not only blame current policy but the fang under Sienna Khan for giving such policy makers the justification to discriminate against them. As the only Faunus in his school he was bullied relentlessly save for one human friend who happened to have a brother in the Atlas millitary as an aide for winter schnee and general Ironwood. His only Friend and one who made him wish to be a hunter to try and stop the grimm and curb the white fang as he saw just how bad the Anti-faunus sentiment got as a result of their terrorist actions and a year later at his 12th birthday a white fang member murdered his friend azul in cold blood for being a human and in trying to stop him was scared down the face by the murderers claws and threw himself into training and getting into fights to try and bring people like that to justice for murdering a human who was able to look past race and economy to try and bridge the gap die from the so called defenders of eqaulity and champions of the faunus. His mother knowing what her son was aiming to become managed to scrape some funds and send him to signal as well as giving him weapons supposedly from her Grandfather(actually his Fathers) and sent him to signal where he became sullen and withdrawn save for a friend he made while in his second year named Ruby Rose whose perky demeanor reminded him so much of his long dead friend and could not help but warm up to her. Through her he met the overbeaing, and in his opinion a bit too vain, sister Yang Xiao Long whom he never got along with but tolerated for the sake of his friendship with Ruby. Now having helped foil Roman a dangerous thief he was given leave to wander farther and wider trying to expand his guilds fame as it was mostly based in Patch and downtown Vale the qauint city being both beautiful in its advancement compared to the outlands and frontier towns and a dangerous in its far more insidous threats, He works to uncover the nature of who his father was by trying to bring fame to his name as well as doing so that his race would be only minor to the good name he would bring through his actions so that he might be claimed by his birth father (unknown to him his father is waiting for that day to come, as well as having written in his will should he die before then of the truth). He dreams of a better world wher the beast are driven back to the deathlands of their origin and humanity and faunus free to live as one people but knows such a thing is lifertimes away and seeks simply to see how far he might help it forward.
[X] Plan Royalist
[X] Name: Clay Nemain
[X] Age: 17
[X] Race (Human or Faunus, please Specify): Snake Faunus
[X] Color Scheme: Terracotta, Black, and Green
[X] Homeland:Mistral
[X] Appearance: A young man, almost tall enough to stand head and shoulders over first year students (around 6 feet). He has brown hair, and green eyes with reptilian pupils. He dresses in formal clothes tailored with specialized combat capabilities to resist damage, appearing as a black duster over a vest and buttoned shirt, with tall boots, long gloves, and an Atlesian (Homburg) hat.
[X] Any Family?: Three cousins (triplets, two female, one male)(Helia, Diana, and Asterus) who live in one of the nomad communities in the wildland. His parents (Aurea and Anguis) disappeared during a Grimm attack only a few years ago, and his sister (Euryale) is somewhat hesitant to be around him when near other people.
[X] Right Hand Weapon Description: A yatagan, inlaid with channels for dust and a handle capable of turning it into a bayonet. (Name: Falling Leaf)
[X] Left Hand Weapon Description: A katar designed to channel dust, and combined with a pair of dust-compatible pistols. (Raven's Claw)
[X] History: Clay has always been an oddity. He is quite affable, even likeable. But he hides a significant dark side. He secretly loves the feeling of the chase, the thrill of combat, the smell of fear. He grew up with parents who served the Grimmbloods, Knights in all but name, and was groomed to be the next Royal Huntsmaster. His sister Euryale was groomed instead to act as a defender, clad all in white robes and silver plate. But having a human mother and a Faunus father led to complications, and he secretly thinks that most people are little more than potential targets for his hunts, but holds the Grimm to be the best game. Should someone demonstrate valor or skill, he views them as an equal. Anything less and they are potential prey. His parents disappeared in a Grimm hunt, and he joined a Guild to complete his training, that he might better serve his rightful masters. His cousins are secret informants for the monarchy, and his sister is deployed to another guild, being eternally willing to see him, but concerned about his other behaviors. He comes from a long line of hunters, and is determined to live up to that legacy. His sense of honor, however, sometimes gets in the way.
[X] Plan alternativ Erin
[X] Name: Erin(pronounced Air-in) Crimson
[X] Age:16
[X] Race (Human or Faunus, please Specify): Wolf faunus (ears)
[X] Color Scheme:Red and white
[X] Homeland:Atlas but currently lives in Vale
[X] Appearance: A yoing man with a rough and tumble appearance wearing a tall coat with a tricorn hat that was his "grandfathers" prize memento said to be from the faunus rights revolution taken from general lagoon himself. now is worn as a keep sake with three scars running down his face his hair an odd mixture of red and white with a respectable six feet of height with a wiry frame belying his strength and intelect and an old signet ring with a wolfs head in the middle of a snowflake said to be from his birth father he wears it constantly.
[X] Any Family?: Nicholas Schnee (for glyphs)(old but it could lead to fun shenanigans later on is not known to be his father(to clarify the PC doesnt know but Nicholas and mara do know who his father is)) Mother: Mara Crimson: A former mine worker and friend to Jack Schnee in his later life and left to keep the rumors of their friendship being beyond appropriate and unknown to the wider public it was more then rumors despite being in her mid 30's atr the time she had her son Erin looks like shes barely in her MId 20's due to a remarkable vitality.
[X] Right Hand Weapon Description: An elegant rapier-gun terribly effective to thrust but remaining able to deliver deadly cuts. taken from general lagoon with etchings added in by his Grandfather with a long series of thorn like etchings and a dust port with the hilt next to the gun mechanism Its name is the bite of Mantle
[X] Left Hand Weapon Description: An elegant Yatagan revolver, shorter than his rapier but able to make monstruous cuts and efficient thrust. with the ability to channel dust into the shots as well as the blade. Its name is The Sting of Truth
[X] History: The Young man from Atlas was born to a single mother in a low rent town house due to having gotten a bad reputation due to both being a faunus and an illegitimate child born out of wedlock only ever knowing his father from a Signet ring sent to his mother when he was two and a small yet sizable amount of money from an anonymous source. He has faced an increase in discrimination due to the white fang but is choosing to not only blame current policy but the fang under Sienna Khan for giving such policy makers the justification to discriminate against them. As the only Faunus in his school he was bullied relentlessly save for one human friend who happened to have a brother in the Atlas millitary as an aide for winter schnee and general Ironwood. But a 12 years old his friend die triying to stop a White Fang terrorist. This die will profondly mark him and convince him that heroism is useless, his friend died unnecessarily, without preventing the flight.
Is he willing to help if he sees people about to die even if he doesnt seek them out. And i assume that since Nicholas sent money and weapons that he does care about his son other wise you have my vote [X] Plan alternativ Erin
did you get the word play on E'r(i.e always) in crimson by having it pronounced that way
Thank you. And yes, he is not insensible to other peoples suffering, he will help people if he sees them he doesnt seek them out. I tried to make a character with dark sides but not too importants.
An dyes, for me Nicholas cares about his son and regret to not have the possibility to make himsel know to him.
hey Kalrotix Do you think we IC could discover who our father was or if we get famous enough the old man will at least privately acknowledge us cause my idea was that it was in Nicholas Schnees will that we were at least privately acknowledged
edit should he die before he can do it himself
hey Kalrotix Do you think we IC could discover who our father was or if we get famous enough the old man will at least privately acknowledge us cause my idea was that it was in Nicholas Schnees will that we were at least privately acknowledged
edit should he die before he can do it himself
